Photos of Fillies

I had to contain myself. She probably didn’t know. There was no way she could know. I’d been sure to cover my tracks every part of the way. I’d even made sure to hide the photos back in my—I remembered earlier and made a mental note to kick myself in the face.

I couldn’t let them find the camera, otherwise they would—Wh-where was the camera!?

My sudden panic attack was brought to a halt by Rainbow Dash’s voice. “Dude, are you okay?”

I shook and I croaked. “UGH!” My screams only caused them to look more concerned. Rainbow raised her eyebrow as the filly looked directly at me—those eyes were painted with concern. Innocent, happy, but concerned. This was the last thing I needed.

“N-No!” I said, almost too quickly before redoubling back, correcting. I clenched my teeth and smiled. “I-I’m fine. I just—” I just my camera, I wanted to say, but I couldn’t tell them that.

“Are you sure?” This time it was the filly’s turn to speak. She rolled over in her mentor’s hooves to give me a look. I could have sworn I saw something when she moved her tail. “You look a little pale.”

“N-no, I’m—” I raised my hands to hold them back, retreating a step as I trudged further into the flowers we had both most definitely, utterly, destroyed.

Rainbow Dash dropped to the ground with a crunch of her hooves into the soft mud,l and Scootaloo was quickly shifted to her back, where she watched from over her mentor’s head.

“I think he dropped something.” I heard somepony say, and my stomach dropped as I was left motionless, unable to do anything but watch in agonising silence as Rainbow Dash leaned to the ground and lifted up the missing camera, strap between her teeth.

“Mmfmmfmmm...?”

Her brow creased and I responded in a similarly perplexed expression, awkwardly holding my hands out. She set the camera on my palm, where it rocked momentarily, and then spat out the strap to speak. “Is this yours?” she repeated.

My mouth hung slightly agape, but I still managed a half-hearted nod. Did that... just happen? “Thanks,” I said.

Rainbow—and the filly with her—nodded.

“You need to be careful where you drop those things, you know. “ Rainbow Dash was still glaring at me, though her expressions had softened a little. It now looked a little more sorry for me rather than angry. She gestured to the Polaroid and I turned it over in my hands—the lens, luckily, hadn’t been damaged, though it was a little muddy. “That needs to be covered.”

“Oh—Oh—” I stuttered as I slung the strap over my shoulder. The feeling of it pulling taught against my back sent a wave of relief through me. It wasn’t gone, thank Celestia. If this thing had gotten into the wrong hands—or—hooves, I couldn’t tell you what would have become of me.

Just knowing what was on it, I wouldn’t be surprised if the news went straight to the top. Princess Celestia—or—oh fuck—Luna—would personally come down to see me to my dungeon. Maybe they’d vaporize me on the spot, or worse--The mental image of being shoved into a cannon and shot to the moon flashed through my head. That was, unfortunately, one of the eventualities Twilight had, repeatedly drilled into me upon my arrival, sometimes almost literally.

But, nevertheless, I took a deep breath and pushed it to the back of my mind. There was no point in dwelling on something that hadn’t happened—or that had almost happened.

I put a grin on, clutching the strap with my right hand, and stood up straight, bringing my eye line almost to level with the filly topping Dash’s head. “Y-Yeah, thanks. I know. I had a cap, I just—” A glint out of the corner of my eye caught my attention.

There was nothing there, just the trees and the playground, and yet still, I felt like I’d just seen the reflection off a pair of glasses, or silver, like a tiara.

I gulped and ignored it, tightening my grip slightly to steady the tremors. “I had a cap,” I said, “but I kind—”

Rainbow Dash snorted and threw me off my swagger. I was thrown back by her sudden, and loud, proclamation: “You lost it, didn’t you?”

“Wha—“ My head snapped around, glancing every which way as I struggled to hide the sudden rising blush. Nopony heard that, did they? No? Good—there wasn’t anypony in earshot, despite the feeling of being watched. “N-n—NO!” I shouted, stuttering still. “I didn’t lose it, it was—It was misplaced!”

Dash’s giggles were joined by snort from her back, and Scootaloo glanced down to her, smiling wide. “He totally lost it,” she said.

They both nodded in agreement and I face-palmed. “No...” A sigh of exasperation escaped me. Somewhere, another giggle drifted on the breeze, too distant to make out clearly whether it was from the fillies on the playground, or from somewhere more close by. “I misplaced it,” again, I repeated, stressing the misplaced. “There’s a difference.”

“Dude,” Dash raised her eyebrow, looking me in the eyes with a knowing mirth, a smirk, and a glint in her eyes that says ‘dude’ more than anything else. “You can’t fool us”—Scootaloo nodded, bobbing on her head with each motion—“I’m, like, a pro’ at bullshitting. You can’t bullshit a bullshitter.” She gave me a nudge with her shoulder. “So come on; what actually happened to it?”

“I told you. I misplaced it.”

Her grin was wild. “Mouth says ‘misplaced’, your face says otherwise.”

“We—“ I licked my lips and relented. “Well—Okay, fine, I lost it.” Huffing, I crossed my arms and turned away my back. “I was taking photos earlier and must have dropped it somewhere and now I can’t find it.”

“There you go!” She bopped me in the shoulder, causing me to stumble under the weight. I had no choice but to face her when she spread her wings, puffing the fur on her chest out as she beat against it with a hoof. The loud thump was all I could hear as she rasped. “Now isn’t that better?”

Granted, it did make me feel a little better. I smiled. It felt nice to be able to tell somepony the truth, even if I was leaving out a few more... sensitive details.

“Y-Yeah, I guess...”

“Don’t ‘I guess’ me,” she said, teasing. Dash kicked off the ground and started a hover. She did a spin in the air and almost gave me whiplash as she darted to my other side, leaning a fetlock over my shoulder whilst Scootaloo bobbed against the back of her head. “Now, do you wanna go find it, or what?”

“Y—” My nodded stopped mid-jolt as what she was implying sunk in. My words suddenly turned into a yelp as I screamed, “N-NO!” Then, moments later, I corrected myself with a mental slap to my forehead.

Here she was, trying to help me, and I’d just screamed ‘no’ in her face! It didn’t matter if I couldn’t let her find out about my other hobby, there were no excuses for being a jackass.

“I-I mean—”

Dash had this hurt look about her, and she was glaring at me with those daggers again. I reeled to try and recover, pulling away from her—out of safety, raising both hands to try and fend off her attacks. “It’s not that important,” I said, almost too matter-of-fact. Hopefully she didn’t pick up on anything else. This mare was unusually smart.

“Why?”

Oh fuck, she knows! Just by the tone alone, I was screwed—“B-Because—” My eyes darted to the sides, scanning the surroundings for a way out. Rainbow Dash felt a whole lot bigger when she was angry, and I remembered how again her horseshoes—steel horseshoes. I should’ve checked if she was wearing any when I had a chance. I swallowed, steadying my racing heart. I repeated, again, with a slightly calmed tone.“I-It’s not that important,” I said, “I—I can just get a new one.”

Her eyes narrowed. It was like being inspected from inside out taken apart by a merciless killer. If they found my body, would they be able to recognise me? Does Equestria even have dental records?

Her ears lowered slightly. Was that a sign of defeat, or a warning? I couldn’t remember. Her eyes looked sad, like I’d wounded a puppy. “Oh... okay.” She said.

I flinched, awaiting the inevitable—“I-It’s not—”—but nothing came.

I looked up and Rainbow Dash had dropped back to the ground. She was quiet, but not angry. Just a little disappointed. She refused to look me in the eyes.

Scootaloo then broke the silence—and the tension, oh thank Celestia!—She piped up from her mentor’s shoulders. “H-Hey,” she whispered. “Aren’t you the guy who, you know—” She waved a hoof, giggling at me—“That crashed our recess a while back?”

A pang of guilt rang through me, calling back to the scene of destruction I’d left in my wake upon arriving in Equestria. It had taken weeks for them to get that crater cleaned up, and I still felt bad about destroying the playground.

Dash raised her eyebrows, though. Her ears perked back up as she glanced up at Scootaloo, and then looked at me with a glint of recognition. “He is?”

“Yeah!” Scootaloo said.

As if there were any other humans in Equestria, I felt like saying, but instead nodded, bracing myself for the inevitable tirade I’d gotten used to getting. I nodded, “Yeah.”

“Oh.”

Silence.

What? No ‘you monster! How could you do this’? Nothing!? Not even going to ask me to explain myself? You’re just going to accept that and move on!? I could live with this, but really!?

“Hey, Dash?” I said. Both eyes suddenly turned back to me, sparkling for a moment of curiosity. I had to tense myself to keep from keeling over from the combined cuteness, and instead grit my teeth, clenching my hands. “So you’re...” I gestured to the filly on her back, as if it was nothing out of the ordinary, and muttered. “You’re teaching her to fly?”

That seemed to do it, as the mood changed like a switch. Dash’s face lit up and her regular, proud self floated to the surface as she spread her wings, making herself large and impressive. “Oh yeah!” she shouted, “And she’s doing awesome. I already have her doing the basics. Soon she’ll be flying on her own and doing tricks, just like her ma—” Dash stumbled slightly, before recovering. “Mentor.”

“My physiotherapist says I’m an anomaly!”

I nodded. Dash continued, “Yeah, she’s progressing super fast, though she still has a long way to go before I’ll let her do anything out of my sight.”

“Aw...”

Scootaloo’s ear dropped and then she slumped against Rainbow’s back, sliding almost all of the way down to her flanks. We both laughed and Rainbow gave a quick buck, jolting Scootaloo up to the crux of her back, where she wouldn’t fall off. “Yeah, well, keep it up, squirt,” she said. “Continue progressing as fast as you do and soon you’ll be as fast and as awesome as yours truly.”

Scootaloo’s face lit up, and she jumped up onto Dash’s shoulders again, leaning in beside her as she shouted. “Wait really!?” She looked at Dash, then at me, and then deflated, sighing, “But I want to be Rainbow Dash now, Dash!”

“Hey,” I ruffled her mane. Oh wow, it was so soft. She always looked so coarse and rough, but now that I had a proper chance to see her up close, she was more cute and soft than I could ever imagine. It was like touching a literal cotton ball, and she seemed to agree.

After a short hesitation, the filly responded with a purr, leaning into my hand as I stroked her head.

I pulled my hand away, smiling, and pointed a thumb over my shoulder, not really anywhere in particular, but just up. “From what I saw back there, you’re already pretty awesome. Doing loops and dives and everything? Terrifying, sweet, and amazing. You should be proud.”

She pouted at the word ‘sweet’ but still blushed at the compliment. “Thanks,” she said, but then blushed, muttering, “The wind helped, though...”

“Still,” Rainbow Dash said, “You did really well.” She pulled the filly off of her back and gave her another squeeze against her chest before booping her snout. Scootaloo immediately sneezed like a kitten, and the whole interaction alone was enough to kill a lesser man—“So well, in fact, that when we get home, I think you’re in a little reward!”

“Oh my fillies, Celestia!” She gasped, practically vibrating with excitement. “You don’t mean it!?” Dash nodded, and Scootaloo practically squee’d. “Sweeeeeeet! Do we get to try the new toys, too?!”

Rainbow Dash gave off a startled ‘eep’, giving me a glance before pulling Scootaloo to her chest. She said something under her breath in Scootaloo’s ear, though I couldn’t tell what it was, and then turned to give us both a half-smirk. “S-Sure,” she said, and then shoved Scootaloo back onto her back.

Dash licked her lips. Her ears lowered slightly as she ascended off the ground. “Hey, so—I-I should really be going. It was to finally meet you, though.”

Scootaloo, on her back, nodded too. “Yeah!” she said. “Don’t go cratering another school yard, okay?”

“Th—” It was my turn to shine red—something I felt like had been happening way too often—and I stuttered. “Th-That happened one time!”

It wasn’t even my fault. There was no way I could control where I’d landed, and if I could, that would’ve been one of the last places I would pick!

Before I could protest, though, Rainbow Dash stuck out one of her legs for a hoof bump. “Like, see ya around?”

I looked blankly at the hoof for a second, before the notion had clicked and I pressed my knuckles against hers. “Y-Yeah,” I said, at a loss for what else to say.

Her hoof pushed against my hand for a moment, then gave way as Rainbow turned to leave. Her entire body tilted, and in a flash she shot into a low glide across the lawn, heading away from me at a speed of a slow-travelling robin.

There were a few glances my way, and I could’ve sworn I heard Dash saying something to Scootaloo, but by this point they were already too far, and were actively climbing to get over the trees, I couldn’t make out what she was saying, yet still, they seemed friendly enough, and Rainbow Dash accompanied Scootaloo in waving when they spotted me staring.

She was acting strange, but no stranger than any embarrassed parent would. I figured she just didn’t want anypony to know she was treating Scootaloo like her own kid, buying her toys and everything.

They picked up height and vanished over the treetops, finally, and once they were gone, I let out the breath I’d been holding.

Finally, I’d done it. I’d survived.

My muscles relaxed slightly—not completely—a part of me reminded myself that I still had to worry about those two fillies. They were out there looking for me, and with a probable means of blackmail too if they decided to go to the royal guard first.

The creeping feeling of being watched etched its way in the back of my mind as I wearily started in the direction of the exit. Checking that there was nopony behind me, I was sure to avoid the flower beds at every turn.

Hopefully I’d be able to get home alive and have this film developed by tomorrow. Fluttershy surely wouldn’t mind waiting another night for her flower pictures, right?

I figured not.

I picked up my pace, now going at just under a sprint.

Still, the creeping feeling like I was being watched refused to leave my back.