The greatest detective in the world.
Once again, he had no idea where the hell he was.
This routine had repeated itself for a couple of days; he'd go to sleep, wake up in any place except his own bed, fall asleep again and finally wake up in his own bed in the morning. However, unlike the previous times, he sensed something familiar about this particular place.
Whatever it was, it made him feel at home.
He remembered clearly, the dark nights and the laughter of children and adults alike that came along with it. Where every day was a special one and everypony lived in peace and harmony. He smiled to himself as he trotted through the town and greeted many familiar faces; he managed to see Mr. and Mrs. Cake putting their kids to bedm while their naïve apprentice kept jumping all over the place. He heard the sound of books falling over from the library and the yelp of a certain neurotic unicorn. He took a deep breath and smiled; listening to the sounds of his home.
“Beep, beep, beep”
All of the other sounds and ponies disappeared as he opened his eyes and looked around his rather small yet clean apartment. He was no longer in Ponyville, he was back at his apartment in the flaming city of Trottingham with an alarm clock ringing its infernal tone. After silencing it and gazing at the beautiful smog filled sky he let out a disappointed sigh and said.
“I knew it was too good to be true.”
He quickly stood up and flipped the sign of his apartment/office from close to open, not that it mattered to him anyways. He hadn’t had a single costumer in the last month, forcing him to survive by eating cups of noodles, which aren´t bad but they aren´t particularly good either. At the moment his food supplies were dwindling and he was down to his last glass of vodka.
“Is this what I get for following my dream?” he thought with grief as he served himself some much diluted vodka. He used to be the son of a nice couple of fashion designers and everypony thought he would grow up to be the most fabulous designer Equestria had ever seen. He would’ve become that too if a certain book hadn’t gotten into his life, Daring Doo and the mystery at Buckingham palace. In fact, as soon as he read the book he started going around Ponyville looking for mysteries to solve, if he couldn’t find any he just made them up.
He did horribly at school, yet he was widely recognized for his deductive thinking and logical problem solving abilities. He decided to drop off high school like most of his friends and live his dream of being a detective who solved crimes and didn’t afraid of anything. He managed to buy a small room in which he could live and work in; the fact that he lived in the basement of the building and that he was antisocial helped to make him an outcast. With no clients and the inability to establish a conversation with potential clients, the business quickly went downhill.
With money supplies dwindling, he seemed to be forced to return to Ponyville in a week’s time and be a fashion designer. He headed towards the door to pick up his mail and spend a whole day reading it since he had nothing better to do nowadays, but fate has a funny way of working and today was no exception.
“Hello Mister Blanc!” said an extremely happy voice.
Blanc gasped as he recognized the mare standing in front of him, grey coat and yellow mane. Not to mention that lingering smell of muffins coming from her.
“Miss Hooves? What are you doing here?” asked Blanc with surprise in his voice, but he couldn’t hide his smile. After all it had been a couple of months since he last saw any pony activity, television not taken into account obviously.
“Oh not much, I just got promoted to lead mail mare of Trottingham!” said Derpy with joy as she flew around in circles, making Blanc chuckle to himself.
“Glad one of my friends is doing all right.” thought Blanc as he watched her knock down one of the generic china vases decorating the building, but catching it quickly before it hit the grouhd.
“So what have you been doing Mister Blanc?” asked Derpy as she brought her face very close to Blanc’s. He trotted back a bit and quickly looked anywhere except towards his friend, he had quite the reputation of being socially awkward and having a lone wolf nature.
“Y-you know, stuff. In fact I’m quite busy at the moment, I’m working on a very important case!” blurted Blanc as he read the gas bill with newfound attention. Derpy entered the apartment and looked around curiously with her mouth wide open.
“Wow! This is your office?” asked Derpy as her eyes looked in 2 different directions.
“Office and home yes.” Said Blanc as he was thinking up of a way to get Derpy to leave the apartment, he didn’t want her to find out he was poor so the less she knew the better.
“That’s so cool, you’re never late to work!” said Derpy as she spotted a cup with the vodka and started sniffing it.
“Yes Miss Hooves! I’m so happy to have you visit me, but look at the time! It’s time for me to go to bed!” exclaimed Blanc as he pushed Derpy out of the apartment.
“But I only arrived 2 minutes ago, and it’s only 2pm!” said Derpy as she pouted and struggled to get back in.
“Why are women always so curious about my sleeping quarters?” thought Blanc as he used all of his strength and power to resist Derpy’s attempts to make herself at home.
“I need my sleep! After all, you wouldn’t want me to be tired on our dinner tonight.” Said Blanc while blocking her view of the room.
At the mention of dinner, Derpy immediately perked up and stared at Blanc in surprise. At that instant he realized what he just said and entered full panic mode.
“Ok! See you at 7 at Hoofers!” yelled Blanc as he shut the door on her face.
5 minutes later.
“What the heck was I thinking?!” yelled Blanc as he paced around his room whilst drinking some water with a lingering smell of alcohol. “Inviting her to dinner when I can barely eat and to top it all off, Hoofers! Some friend I am, she probably thinks I’m a pervert now, why does this only happen to me?”
“Hello? Are you talking to someone Mister Blanc?” asked Derpy from outside the house, causing Blanc to blush and quickly dress up in the only clothes he had, a 50’s detective outfit he used once at a costume party. Sadly, it was the last surviving personal belonging that didn’t succumb to gambling.
“Just my phone! I’m getting dressed to take you out ok?”
“Okey Dokey” replied Derpy as she paced outside of the room. While she was waiting, Blanc sat on the edge of his bed and entered a session of deep thinking. He had to make a choice of either invite Derpy to a good dinner, or use the money to remain here for 3 more days.
“Well, I can always sell this apartment to someone and return to Ponyville, at least there I can find a job anywhere. I guess I’ll use the last of my money on this dinner.” Thought Blanc grimly to himself. Afterwards he stood up reluctantly and trotted around the room while admiring its humble splendor.
“Besides, it’s not like I have much of a future here….” Whispered Blanc as he left the now empty glass by the faucet. His dream seemed to be close to an end and surely he would return home and make some fancy clothes for the so called upper class of Canterlot. He then made his way to the door with his last 20 bits and tried to put up his best smile for his friend.
“Ready to go and catch up?” asked Blanc while locking his door; Derpy nodded happily in response and started making her way to the stairs.
“You look cool Blanc, but didn’t you say you had to sleep?” said Derpy as she hopped by his side, earning a small look of guilt from Blanc.
“Uh… I drank coffee.” Replied Blanc; as they walked towards the exit of the building one particular thought entered his mind.
“Wait, I just took Miss Hooves out for dinner, with 5 hours to spare?” thought Blanc as he started blushing.
The restaurant was one of the most liberal places in all of Equestria, with mares that were unusually easygoing and stallions looking to score a quick hit and run. Of course there was the occasional noble mare who wanted nothing more than to earn money for her family, and the mare looking for his one true love in the land of colts and abuse. Blanc found it quite disgusting to say the least, the mere thought of a mare selling herself for simple desires filled him with a great feeling of repulsion. Sadly, it was the only place he could afford at the moment; at least he would if the bartender gave him a special discount as a farewell present.
As soon as the couple entered the establishment, Blanc felt the oppressive aura of lust and desire. Luckily this was one of the quiet nights so there were only silent costumers around; He looked at Derpy for reassurance and sure enough she was smiling and laughing without a care in the world.
"The less she knows about this hellhole, the better." thought Blanc to himself while smiling. As he was looking around for a place to sit a lime colored mare interrupted his view with a big fake smile.
“Hello Sherlock! Where would you like to sit today?” asked a lime mare while smiling slightly, she was wearing the traditional uniform of the establishment and she was the only waitress working for the night.
“If I had a bit every time I heard that….” Thought Blanc with his pride hurt.
“Uh… we’ll take any place.” Said Blanc while looking around the restaurant, there was only one pony in a trenchcoat, a couple of guys talking by the corner and the manager walking around. The lime mare then whispered in his ear. “How about you sit between my legs cutie pie?”
“How about no?” replied Blanc as he glared at her and took Derpy to a table by the corner, Derpy felt sorry for the mare since she seemed kind of sad and she swore she saw her cry a bit.
"Poor girl, I think she just needs a hug. Maybe we can invite her over here and be friends." thought Derpy as she looked around the establishment. It wasn't anything special but it certainly was somewhat cozy and warm.
It was an amusing scene for any bypasser, at one end there was the gray pony who was observing every detail Hoofers had to offer, and on the other side there was a pony who thought the menu was similar to a treasure map. No words were spoken between them, although Derpy did establish a good conversation with the waitress and both seemed to be having a good time; much to Blanc's annoyance.
"I can't let my friend become someone like her!" thought Blanc to himself as he glared at both mares.
“So Miss Hooves, how have you been doing here in Trottingham?” asked Blanc idly as he finally made eye contact with Derpy.
“Oh! I’ve been doing very well! Except for the smog clouds, they’re very bad for flying and I end up coughing up there. Not to mention that the muffins here taste weird and all the people are very mean to me sometimes, but my boss is a very nice mare so that makes me very happy!” said Derpy as her eyes looked at both the lime pony and at Blanc.
“Very different from Ponyville don’t you think?” asked Blanc while chuckling at his friend’s joy.
“Yes! It is way too big! Trottingham should learn a thing or two from Ponyville!” Said Derpy as she started to look for muffins on the dessert section of the menu,
"It would certainly help if it was smaller." said the lime pony with a weak voice.
"It would also help if ponies here had a sense of morality and weren't as easy going." said Blanc as he glared at the lime mare, causing her to gulp slightly. Out of the blue he felt a growling sensation from his stomach and blushed heavily while begging not to be heard by the mares.
"Damn it noodles, why now?" thought Blanc to himself.
"I'll be right back." said Blanc as he ran off to the restroom with a look of total despair written over his face. Leaving Derpy and the mysterious mare all alone much to his regret. Derpy was having the time of her life with the lime mare, she was the second friend she had made since she arrived at town, not to mention she was very nice to her.
"Why were you sad earlier miss?" asked Derpy; earning a look of sadness from the mare.
"Miss Hooves... hold on to this." said the mare as she deposited a flash drive in her mailbag. This confused her for a moment but then had the thought that this was a gift from a new friend.
"Thank you! I will!" said Derpy as she smiled widely and started clapping her hooves while giggling.
"Yay! She's very happy!" thought Derpy happily.
"Would you like to hang out with us tonight?" asked Derpy with a wide smile.
The lime pony suddenly started sobbing in front of her and hugged her tight, confusing Derpy for a while.
Before anyone knew what happened, the lights went out for a moment. Derpy was confused as to why the power had failed only in this building, she suddenly felt the lime pony get stiff and felt some warm liquid in her hand.
"Are you ok friend?" asked Derpy while nuding the pony.
"Who turned off the lights?" yelled a male voice.
Blanc had just finished his business in the restroom when the lights went out, his first thought immediately darted to the common electrical failure in the area so he didn't hurry up much.
"After all, the lights should come back any minute." thought Blanc to himself as he started washing his hooves.
As soon as the lights turned back on he walked out of the restroom and was greeted by a rather nasty sight.
The lime mare was lying on a pool of her own blood directly in front of Derpy, a knife sticking out from her back and the blood was still flowing. Blanc had to maintain his stomach under control in order to not throw up,
“What the hell was that?” yelled one of the costumers who stared at the scene.
"Oi! It's the cross eyes! She's done Linda in the back that's what she did!" yelled the manager as he pointed the hoof at Derpy, whom was rather busy crying her soul out over the body of her recent friend. Blanc quickly looked at everyone at the scene and started thinking to himself about what to do, until the thought hit him.
His friend was the prime suspect of a murder case.
And he was the only one who could prove her innocence.
"Alright you ponies, nobody move. I got this." said Blanc in the most secure voice he could manage.
