The Magic of Friendship, Love, and Guns

As the two caped crusaders backed away from the robot, Bender’s eyes bugged out while making excited noises.

“Hellooo, sexy mama.” He went over and leaned on the robot’s leg. “Hey, baby. Name’s Bender, but you can call me anytime~.” The robot looked down at Bender, as if…actually considering his attempted flirting. Until it then kicked him away, having him crash against the machine. The Robot turned its attention on the two vigilantes and aimed its cannons at them, firing a massive wave of ice at them. The two dodged the wave of ice as Bender got back up. “Wooo, I love me a Fembot with an attitude.”

“Bender! Take out the machine! We’ll hold off the bot!” Red Robin said as he used the sonic weapon in his staff to shatter a wall of ice.

The robot fired another wall of ice at Robin, but Robin quickly rolled away from the blast, groaning as his foot was now frozen. Robin gasped as the robot aimed at him but suddenly multiple batarangs were soaring through the air and exploded upon impact. Red Robin grabbed Robin and ran off behind some ice pillars

“Hold still.” Red Robin pulled out a small laser and used it to try and melt the ice around Robin’s foot. The ice bot staggered a bit before looking around, stomping around searching for the two.

While the big robot was searching for the two, Bender went up to the machine that was responsible for this ice storm and opened up the control panel.

“Hmm, this will take all my technological knowledge to properly shut this machine down. But first, the proper tool.” Bender reached in his chest before bringing out a crowbar. “Take this!” Bender started beating the control panel. On the last hit, the machine lets off an electrical discharge that went right into Bender. “Awwwwwww yeeeeeeahhh.”

Sparks of electricity flew as Bender whacked the controls. The robot turned back to see Bender by the machine and aimed its cannons at him but was suddenly attacked by exploding batarangs. Red Robin and Robin both charged at the robot from behind, Red Robin used his staff to jump up as Robin threw his sword into the robot’s back. Red Robin landed on the Robot’s back and tossed Robin back his sword. Using his staff, Red Robin sent a powerful voltage of electricity through the opening from the sword to electrocute the robot. The Robot let out an automatic scream as it staggered. Robin grabbed his sword and slashed at the cannons, mist and frost covered the robot's arms. Red Robin soon jumped back and aimed his staff at the robot.

“Bender! Try to override the machine! Hurry!” Red Robin shouted at Bender.

“Bender. Try to override the machine,” Bender repeated in a sarcastic tone before reaching inside his chest and bringing out a few cables attached to him. He then plugged the wires into the machine causing all the freezing weather. “Alright, keep that giant floozy off my back and we should be good to go in a few minutes.”

“We don’t have a few minutes!” Robin shouted as he used his grappling hook to scale up a large pillar of ice while the robot fired giant ice balls at the two vigilantes. Robin jumped off the ice pillar as it was knocked down by the ice balls and rolled to the ground.

"I got an idea! Push the robot into the machine!” Red Robin shouted.

His eyes widened as he saw the robot aiming at Damian and fired. Red Robin ran forward and threw Robin out of the way but was caught in the blast, his body except his face and hands were encased in ice. Red Robin shivered and gasped as his teeths clattered from the cold. The Robot aimed once more at the duo as Robin tried breaking Red Robin free.

“Aw, crap.” Bender went and destroyed the machine before rushing over and downing a whole six-pack. Once he was in front of the Robins and facing the robot, he bent down, turned around, and opened his crotch plate. “Bite my flaming ass!” He then lets out what most would consider a fart and a continuous flame hit the robot and the machine behind it, melting the two.

“…We can never let anyone know that we were saved by a fire farting robot,” Robin said and cringed.

“A-A-Agreed-d-d,” Red Robin shivered from the cold as the machine and robot melted together and was now becoming an ugly piece of artwork. The robot’s lights shut off and then its arm cannons exploded and was closed in ice. Robin walked up to Bender and patted his leg.

“…Never speak of this,” Robin said as he and Bender then started to free Red Robin from the ice.

“Oh, like anyone’s gonna believe that. What they will believe is this.” Bender went and projected the scene that just happened to the two vigilantes. “Now, no one needs to see that, but uh, I’ll need a little help finding the delete button,” Bender said while looking away and holding out his hand toward Robin. Both Robins rolled their eyes before handing Bender a few hundred dollars. They kept some cash on them in case they ever needed it while still in their uniform.

“You better not tell anyone. Especially Todd,” Robin said.

“Yeah, sure, whatever,” Bender chuckled as he counted the cash.

Red Hood and Nightwing were making their way to the basement of the school, noticing it was getting more and more colder the further they went. Seeing frost and ice cover the walls and ceiling.

“We must be getting close,” Nightwing said, following some pipes and soon heard voices coming down the hall. The two crouched down and moved quietly as they peeked behind the corner, seeing a large lab with Dr. Freeze and over a dozen armed guards with the hostages. They seemed to be working on some sort of formula.

“Why is it not done yet?” Dr. Freeze demanded while talking down to an older professor.

“I-I-I’m sorry, D-Dr. Freeze, but this just doesn’t-!” The professor gagged as Freeze grabbed his throat.

“I don’t want excuses! I want answers!” Freeze said, his chilling voice filled the hostages with dread as they feared what he would do to them and worked harder. As Freeze paced among the hostages, he let out a dark chuckle. “You can come out of the shadows, boy wonders. You cannot hide from my infrared.” The guards turned their guns away from the hostages and aimed them at Red Hood and Nightwing.

“Just wanted to see if it’s too late for extra credit,” Nightwing said as Red Hood dropped some smoke bombs and the two jumped through the smoke.

Red Hood used his pistols to shoot the guns out of the guards hands while Nightwing lept at them. Moving elegantly through the air as he smacked them across the face with his batons. Taking down the guards in under a minute before the two vigilantes stared down at Freeze.

“You can stop this, Victor. Just put down the ice gun,” Red Hood said. Nightwing was surprised by this as Red Hood rarely, if ever, told someone to give up without shooting their kneecaps off first or beating them into submission.

‘I can’t stop. You know I can’t stop, not while Nora’s life is on the line.” Freeze aimed his gun at the two with a cold expression. “Now leave, or I’ll have no choice but to kill you.”

“Freeze, just wait-,” Red Hood didn’t finish as he and Nightwing both had to dodge a blast of ice from Freeze. “Get the people out of here, I’ll hold him off!” Red Hood told Nightwing as he fired at Freeze. Nightwing began evacuating the hostages while Red Hood and Dr. Freeze fired at one another.

“Victor, listen to me! I know what you’re-!” Red Hood stopped as he rolled behind a table just as Dr. Freeze threw an ice bomb near him. Seeing the small area now covered in ice. Red Hood gritted his teeth and jumped from behind the table.

“Hot shot!” Red Hood shouted, firing a small flare at Freeze’s ice blast. The two blasts hit and resulted in a large cloud of frost and smoke.

“I know what it’s like, Freeze, to have a loved one taken from you and the will to do whatever it takes for the ones you love,” Red Hood tried to reason with Dr. Freeze.

“What could you possibly know, Red Hood?! Your heart is colder than even mine!” Freeze spat before throwing another ice bomb at the ceiling above Jason, causing it to come crashing down toward him.

Red Hood gasped and tried to jump out of the way until he slipped on the icy floor, looking up as he saw ice shards about to pierce him. He outstretched his hand in a feeble attempt to stop it, until suddenly, a black tentacle appeared forth from his hand and shattered the ice shards to bits. Jason looked down at his hand with shock and great confusion, wondering just how he did that and what it was. He didn’t have much time to question it as Dr. Freeze fired another stream of ice at him but Jason managed to jump out of the way in the nick of time.

“You’re right, my heart was black and cold as the ice that surrounds us! I didn’t give a damn about others and pushed away everyone that tried to help me because I was afraid! But now…I have a family, women who love me, a child and more on the way! I know the feeling of wanting to do whatever it takes to protect them. My lovers, they are some of the most powerful magic users and rulers of this land. If you give up, I give you my word that we WILL help find a cure for your wife. Please. Do it for Nora,” Jason pleaded as he got up from behind cover and held out his hand, showing Dr. Freeze to trust him.

Freeze kept his aim on Jason, wondering whether or not to fire or trust the one who led an army into Gotham. But the thought of any true help for his wife weighed heavily on him. Finally, Freeze lowered his gun and took a step forward.

“I have no reason to trust the words of a man who’s taken the lives of many,” Freeze said coldly. “However, considering you would go through such great lengths to convince someone like me, who was supposed to be your enemy, I shall choose to give you the benefit of the doubt. However, I warn you, Red Hood, if you’re lying, then Hell freezing over won’t be a metaphor to you.” Freeze handed him the weapon and nodded. “I’m at your mercy, for Nora. I surrender.”

“I promise you that we will do everything we can to save your wife,” Jason said, taking Freeze’s weapon. He then called the others.

“Freeze surrendered,” Jason told them. As both the Robins, Nightwing, and Bender entered the room, Jason was putting Freeze in handcuffs.

“I wasn’t aware the Bat was building his wards these days,” Freeze commented over at Bender.

“Lick my frozen metal ass.” Bender then lifts Freeze from the ground and proceeds to carry him out.

“It would seem I was mistaken. The Bat would never construct something like this,” Freeze said while being carried back to the ship.

“Are the hostages secure?” Batman asked over the comms

“Don’t worry, I took them back to the gym,” Nightwing said.

“Good, I was able to radio back the Princesses about sending-,”

SCREECH!

A loud shriek was heard and the group looked up to see…griffons? Their feathers were white with a mix of green, their eyes a sickly glowing green, and they had unusually large grins on their faces. There were about a dozen of them and they flew down towards Red Hood and the others, bearing their sharp talons.

“Hey! What’s with the flying jerks?” Bender asked before bringing out an electric gun.

“It would seem the clown has been busy,” Freeze noted while watching the flock gather over the ship.

“Did you know about this?!” Robin asked as the flock of infected Griffons swooped down, their talons aiming for their heads and throats. Red Hood pulled out his pistols and took aim.

“Stun!” He fired and was able to stun four of them but they didn’t stop. They just took the pain and swooped down. One tackled Red Robin to the ground.

“Hahahahaha!” The Griffon laughed hysterically as it tried clawing Red Robin’s throat out.

Red Robin kicked off the Griffon and whacked it over the head with his staff, but like with Jason’s pistols it didn’t stop. The others were now fighting off the Griffons and trying to keep them at bay, but nothing they did was able to keep them down.

“We gotta restrain them somehow!” Nightwing said as he dodged a few swipes from a Griffon.

“Why don’t we just use this?” Bender brought out Freeze’s gun and aimed it at the flock. “Who wants cold chicken?!” He said before firing the gun and froze a few of the attacking buzzards.

“That works!” Jason said before getting tackled by a Griffon.

Nightwing and Robin were fighting against a few other Griffons until one grabbed Damian and lifted him up high into the air, making Damian drop his sword and grappling hook. Bender froze the Griffon but it still held on to Damian. The frozen Griffon and Damian began falling.

“No!” Batman and the others all shouted as they tried to rescue Damian but were halted by the other Griffons.

Bender threw down the gun and charged past the griffons using his robot strength and stopped under where Damian was falling. He used his extendable legs and arms to stretch higher and catch Damian and the griffon he was frozen to. Once he caught him, Bender brought Damian close to his cheek.

“Aww. I couldn’t let you splatter on the ground, little meatbag,” Bender teased.

Damian growled and glared at Bender. “Put. Me. Down.” He demanded.

Click.

Damian turned to see Nightwing holding a Griffon back with his foot and a phone in his hand.

“I’m gonna kill you!” Damian shouted while struggling to get free from Bender’s hold and the frozen Griffon.

Nightwing laughed before shouting as the Griffon tackled him. Nightwing grabbed his head and slammed him into the ground, punching him over and over, but it did nothing as it kept fighting back.

Red Hood jumped over and kicked a Griffon off the roof, but it flew up and charged at him. Bender tossed Damian to the side and started grabbing Griffons.

“C’mon you overgrown chickens! Time for the chef to start cooking!” Bender said.

He started grabbing them by their wings and throwing them down to the ground and placing them in his chest. After a few minutes, Bender had captured them all. When he felt them try to get out, he turned to Nightwing.

“Hey, Tricky Dicky. How about giving me another jolt?” Bedner asked.

Nightwing figured out what Bender was planning and smirked as he charged up the voltage in his batons and electrocuted Bender. The Griffons couldn’t feel pain, but that didn’t make them invincible. Their bodies eventually gave out from the pain and finally ceased their attacks.Bender opened up his chest and the Joker-Griffons fell out into a smoking pile of twitching bodies. He then took out a chef hat, a carving knife, and a carving fork.

“Alright, who wants the dark meat?” Bender offered. Red Robin smacked the utensils out of his hands and shook his head.

“We need to restrain them. Red Hood,” Red Robin said.

“On it.” Jason used some rope and tied up their wings and each other to keep them from escaping. Once that was done they carried them onto the ship that waited for them. That was when they saw Wonderbolts and other Pegasus guards beginning to fly into the city.

“Guess they can finally come in,” Nightwing said.

“Ain’t that how it is? The guys without the badge do all the work, while the ones with the badge take all the credit. What a croc,” Bender complained.

“Meh, you get used to it,” Nightwing said as they saw the guards swoop in and start to tend to the citizens, at least the ones that could be saved. Two Wonderbolts landed down in front of them. One was the one that attacked Jason back in the Crystal Empire, Spitfire, and the other was a stallion with a light cyan colored coat and a dark blue mane.

“Whoa. There are more of you?” Spitfire asked while looking at Batman and the others.

“We’ll take Freeze into custody, we’ve subdued the guards and taken down the weather machine that was causing the blizzard,” Batman said as they headed up to the ship.

“Wait, wait, wait. You mean to tell us that just you six freed this entire place? Alone?” The pegasus stallion was shocked to see that they had done this single handedly.

“You know it, Clipper. We’re large and in charge,” Bender said while bringing Nightwing and Red Robin in for a double headlock.

“Don’t push it,” Red Robin said while getting out of Bender’s grip.

“This feels like he’s overstaying his welcome,” Nightwing muttered.

“And who are you?” Damian asked, crossing his arms.

“I’m Soarin, vice-captain of the Wonderbolts,” Soarin answered.

“Well, anyways, we’re here to help with the civilians,” Soarin said as he then walked up to Red Hood. “By the way, I saw your fight back at the Crystal Empire against Shining Armor. You are amazing!” Red Hood took off his helmet and smiled.

“Thanks, nice to meet a fan,” Jason said with a chuckle.

“Woah, mama. Get a room, you two, haha haha!” Bender laughed before getting back on the ship.

“Uh…not sure why you guys have a talking trashcan, but he’s got a point,” Soarin said with a red tint to his cheeks.

“He’s not with us, he was dropped on us. But if you want a room, you gotta take a guy to dinner first.” Jason gave a playful wink at Soarin. Soarin stood stock still and his wings nearly sprung out. He then shook his head and chuckled. “Haha, good one.” Soarin went with the rest of the guards and Spitfire while looking back at Jason’s ass.

“Wow, that guy’s so far back in the closet, he broke through another room,” Bender remarked.

“I am the desire of women and men,” Jason laughed as he headed back up the ship, glancing back at Soarin and caught him staring. Jason smirked at Soarin before heading up to the ship.

“Hey, Bender, quick question. How can you tell a person’s sexual preference when you yourself don’t even have genitals?” Tim asked Bender while walking up the gangplank.

“First off, I do have a way to tell if I’m a dude.” Bender went and flicked his antenna. “And second, I have what you might call, gaydar.” Bender reached into his chest and pulled out what looked like a small mobile radar device. He points it at Soarin and the machine starts beeping rapidly before giving off a ding. “Yep, he’s gay.”

“I’m not gonna even begin to ask how and why the fuck you have that,” Jason said as Batman took control of the ship and started to fly back to Canterlot.