Give the Audience What They Want
Pinkie Pie bounced merrily across Ponyville, clenching a large picnic basket by its handle in her teeth. The other ponies watched her pass, and a few waved to her, but she didn’t seem to pay them any mind.
She soon arrived at her destination: Carousel Boutique. Rather than bound into the front entrance, she rounded the round building to the domestic entrance and let herself in. She found Rarity in the kitchen, setting a kettle of tea on the stove. Pinkie beamed, dropping the basket, which made a heavy thud.
“Afternoon, Rarity!” she chimed.
Rarity jumped slightly, but put on a friendly smile. “Oh! Hello, Pinkie. I wasn’t expecting you.”
“I just stopped by to see how Sweetie Belle was doing. She made a lot of progress at yesterday’s lesson.”
Rarity beamed. “Oh, that’s wonderful, darling! I’m so proud of her, expressing her creative talents in new ways.” She glanced at the tea kettle. “Can I get you anything while you’re here? Some tea will be ready shortly.”
“No thanks, Rarity. My fuel tank is already topped off,” Pinkie said, picking the basket back up.
“Very well. Sweetie Belle is up in her room. I wholeheartedly support her endeavors, but I simply couldn’t let her use my workspace – what if she got oil on my fabrics?”
Pinkie nodded. Rarity flashed her another smile before turning her attention to the kettle and huffing a sigh. She sat back on her haunches and drooped, head swimming with thoughts.
“Is… everything ok, Rarity?”
The unicorn jumped, nearly running into the stove, and whirled around to find Pinkie still there, albeit closer to the kitchen exit. She had an eyebrow raised.
“Y-yes of course, darling,” Rarity said, making a shooing motion. “Now, go along. Mustn’t keep Sweetie Belle waiting.”
Pinkie watched her for a moment with a skeptical look before turning and leaving, heading up the stairs. She swore she heard Rarity huff a sigh of relief once she was halfway up the stairs.
Pinkie looked between the doors, taking a second to study each one, before picking one and knocking firmly.
“Come in,” came a muffled Sweetie Belle from within.
Pinkie stepped inside, and was surprised to see not just one Sweetie Belle, nor two, but instead three. Two of them stood identically: solid as rocks, unmoving, eyes closed, with a hole in their foreheads where their horns should be. The third one was very much active, as evident in her disheveled mane and besmirched coat.
“Oh, hey P-Buddy,” Sweetie said cheerfully, dropping the rag she was using to clean her front hooves.
The robot blinked twice and dropped the basket. “How’d you know it was me?”
Sweetie giggled. “Well, Pinkie doesn’t usually knock – she’d probably find some sort of shortcut into my room.”
P-Buddy thought for a moment before nodding. “That does sound like the boss,” she admitted.
“So, what do you think?” Sweetie Belle stood to the side, gesturing to her inactive doppelgangers.
“Well, they at least look like you. Mostly. Why’d you make two?” P-Buddy asked, walking over and scanning each of the inactive Sweetie Belles up and down.
“To be honest, I just had so many parts.” Sweetie Belle shrugged, picking up the rag in her magic again to wipe down her coat. “Pinkie gave me the parts for an adult-sized robot, but I’m not an adult yet. I figured I’d try to make another, that’s why I’ve been asking for more parts.”
“Well, from a technical standpoint, these seem pretty complete. Except their horns.”
Sweetie Belle gave a sheepish smile. “Well, that wasn’t exactly covered in the lessons. You aren’t a unicorn robot, after all.”
P-Buddy nodded thoughtfully and walked over to the basket, sliding it over to her. “That’s why the boss sent these,” she said.
Sweetie eagerly lifted the lid of the picnic basket and used her magic to pull out what was inside. Out floated capacitors, circuitry, and wires, before finally—two small horns that matched Sweetie Belle’s light grey coat.
“This is fantastic!” Sweetie exclaimed, already setting the parts out around her robots for installation. Tools from a toolbox off to the side quickly joined them. “I didn’t know Pinkie knew how to incorporate unicorn magic into robots.”
“Well…” P-Buddy glanced around. “I could show you something.”
Sweetie Belle halted what she was doing, turned sharply to P-Buddy, and sat on her haunches with an eager grin and nod. P-Buddy smiled before reaching back and poking the balloons of her faux cutie mark in a specific order. She concluded by booping herself on the snout.
There was a soft whirring noise. P-Buddy looked up to her forehead as a unicorn horn matching her chassis coat spun out like a screw from under P-Buddy’s curly mane. Sweetie Belle gasped, covering her mouth.
“Pinkie made you a unicorn robot too!” she exclaimed cheerfully, getting up and onto her hind legs to examine the horn this way and that.
“It’s… an experimental feature,” P-Buddy explained. “Now, the horn has its limits, especially those smaller models for your robots. It only has a tractor beam function as of right now, and consumes a lot of fuel the more it’s used or if it’s used on objects harder to lift.”
“Tractor beam? So… only telekinesis?”
P-Buddy nodded. “That’d be the organic version: it picks up things in an energized field.”
“Well, this is great and all, but…” Sweetie Belle huffed a sigh and turned to her robots. “I’m not sure how to install them. Again, it wasn’t exactly covered in Pinkie’s lessons.”
“The boss thought of that,” P-Buddy said cheerfully. “I can show you how mine’s installed so you can install yours.”
Sweetie Belle squealed, running over to hug P-Buddy. “Thank you so much!”
“My pleasure. It’s literally my job to make you smile,” the robot replied, before looking past her to the other Sweetie Belles. “So, have you decided on what you’ll call them?”
“I was thinking of calling them unitrons, seeing as they’re the first unicorn robots – well, I mean, first unicorn designated robots. That’s correct, right?” She grinned sheepishly at P-Buddy.
“That’s… a little impersonal, don’t you think?” P-Buddy cocked her head to the side. “I mean, I’m called P-Buddy because it’s short for ‘Pinkie Buddy,’ which is my purpose.” She beamed. “What’s the purpose of your robots?”
Sweetie Belle hummed in thought. “Well… I guess to just be me. I can’t always hang out with Apple Bloom or Scootaloo, so I thought a robot could fill in for me. I even tweaked their harmonization modules to be able to sing like me. We could even sing together, Power of Three and all that.”
P-Buddy frowned. “Power of Three? What’s that?”
“Pinkie never taught you? Well, I’ve been doing research into it. If three ponies get together, especially friends, there’s some sort of synchronization energy that happens between them that just… boosts everything. That’s why Scootaloo, Apple Bloom, and I always do amazing at stuff,” Sweetie Belle explained. “I figured the same could work with three Sweetie Belles.”
P-Buddy rubbed her chin, squinting in thought. “Well… if they’re meant to be you, why not call them… Sweetie Bots?”
Sweetie Belle hummed in thought, looking between her two doppelgangers. “I suppose that could work. I already gave them serial numbers to tell them apart, just like Pinkie has with you.” She pointed a hoof at the Sweetie Bot to her left. “18-9-7-8-20-25.” Then she pointed to the other. “And 12-5-6-20-25.”
“Interesting choice. Now, let me open up my face plates, and we—“
P-Buddy was cut off by a loud scream from downstairs that made Sweetie Belle jump. The robot blinked in confusion.
“That sounded like Rarity! Come on!” Sweetie Belle bolted through the door, P-Buddy in hot pursuit. They thundered down the stairs and into the kitchen.
They found Rarity laying on her back on the floor. On the table, next to a freshly poured cup of tea, was a loaf of bread missing a slice, which lay next to Rarity with a bite out of its corner.
“Rarity! Are you alright?” Sweetie Belle asked frantically, rushing to her sister’s side.
“Oof… Sweetie Belle…” Rarity said. Her little sister helped her up onto her haunches. “Applejack stopped by with a loaf of the most delightful apple bread I have ever tasted. I believe it even had a pinch of cinnamon.”
“Why’d you scream?” P-Buddy asked.
“Well, it was such a rush of emotions and warmth so unexpectedly.” Rarity squinted at her, blinking a few times. “Darling… do you have a horn?”
P-Buddy’s pupils shrunk as she quickly retracted it. “Nope!” she quickly covered.
“It must be something with the bread,” Sweetie Belle said with a nervous chuckle.
“Oh, there’s something with the bread alright,” Rarity said, conviction in her voice as she puffed out her chest. “It filled me with such warmth that it got me thinking. Here I’ve been moping around these past few days, bemoaning a non-existent love life when I could be out there starting one!”
And before either unicorn or robot could say anything, Rarity charged out the door with a determined glint in her eyes. P-Buddy and Sweetie Belle stood there, blinking in confusion.
“What was that all about?” P-Buddy finally asked.
“She’s been a bit down lately, so much so that it affected her work,” Sweetie Belle explained. “I didn’t want to ask… mostly because she goes for a chaise lounge and a tub of ice cream when she gets depressed.” She huffed a sigh. “I think she’s cured.”
“Are you ready to install those tractor beam transmitters now?”
“Just a sec, I have to go put up the closed sign.” Sweetie Belle huffed. “No telling when she’s getting back – I could probably build a dozen more Sweetie Bots by the time she gets a love life.”
Author's Note
Date of Creation (D.o.C.): 4/4/20
Someone in the comments of the last story, "Apple Bread," asked for both more P-Buddy as well as, for some reason, two Sweetie Bots. Which is why the title of the chapter is the way it is. They too have "serial numbers."
The song I listened to while writing this was "Bounce Man Stage" from Mega Man 11. Has the right amount of springiness and mechanical to it for P-Buddy.
-yours truly,
The Legendary Bill Cipher
