The Continuing Adventures of Baudy, the Filly With a Dial-Up Modem for a Vagina

Baudy walked into the pony's place like she'd lived there before. She found the couch immediately and kicked up on it, sprawling out with a pillow to cushion her head and taking up generally the entire length of the piece of furniture, which was a nice black leather-like material—hopefully not the real thing, Baudy thought.

The pony who owned the couch looked very similar, with a dark brown-black coat, a brown-red, dusty-looking mane with a little goatee-type beard, and a cutie mark of two pieces of paper being weighed on a scale. It seems the bit part ponies always get the office related cutie marks in this universe.

His eyes were a deep brown, and he smiled when he saw Baudy on the couch. He smiled extra big when he saw her from behind, waving her thong-clad ass at him under her skirt. If he looked extra hard, he could've seen just the peek of white plastic underneath, and the even-more hidden black circle port in the center of the plastic. But he was mostly focused on Baudy's butt, and after all, who could blame him?

Baudy noticed, and giggled, giving her butt an extra wiggle and bounce for the sudden audience. She crossed and uncrossed her hind-legs, showing off the crack of her ass and the way the red thong seemed to hug the inside of her curves, hinting at the tight, tiny butthole underneath.

The pony watching licked his lips. He looked hungry like he hadn't eaten in weeks—maybe in his whole life.

"You look great," he said.

Obviously, Baudy thought to herself.

"Thanks," she said. "You're cool too. This is a nice place. You get any porn channels on there?" She gestured to the flat-screen T.V., which was still for some reason referred to as a 'flat-screen' T.V., when many more contemporary synonyms existed, such as 'smart T.V.', 'HD T.V.', etc. etc...

"Uh, no, that's fine, you can call it a flat-screen if you want. The screen is pretty flat, aheh..."

"Right. Heh. But the porn channels?"

"Oh, yeah. I get a few. Wanna see?"

Baudy grinned devilishly at him.

"Now you're speaking my language. Got anywhere I can plug this in?" She held up her laptop and pointed to the ethernet port, and dangled the long yellow cable she'd brought with her other hoof.

"Um, I think there are some ports that look like that on the back of the router... what do you need it for, exactly?"

"Just wanna get a feel for the network, scope the internet traffic, maybe poke into your shared drives... just get a feel for who I'm dealing with, y'know?"

"Not, really no." The pony scratched his head. "Wouldn't you like, like to know my name first, or something?"

Baudy smacked her head theatrically and grinned.

"Oi! Doofus. Of course I would. You know I totally forget that bit all the time? I was still just mentally referring to you as 'FillyButtLover69' in my head." She smirked at him, and wiggled her butt again, bouncing her cheeks up and down and making her viewer sweat even more than he had been.

"You can, uh, call me that if you want to... but my real name's Paperweight."

"Paperweight... 'cuz you weigh papers, right?"

"Uh, no. I kind of just... stand on top of a big stack of paper and make sure it doesn't go anywhere. And when ponies need some paper, they ask me to move, and if they have the right form, I do, and they can get a piece of paper." He cleared his throat and adjusted a tie he wasn't wearing. "It's a very important job. Not just anypony could do it."

"Did you know your neighbour's been stealing your wi-fi?" Baudy asked. She was clicking through a flurry of file-trees and pages on her laptop. It looked like she was using one of those 'enter-the-matrix' style UIs they make for movies where the computer science is fudgy at best and psyche-shatteringly-awful in the other direction. Paperweight noticed a distinct "HACK THE GIBSON" button in the top left corner of the screen.

What the heck was a Gibson?

"Anyway, I'm almost done here. Do you wanna put on some tunes before we fuck?"

"Uh, sure. I have smart speakers, so you can just play something from my phone and it'll broadcast through the house—oh, yeah, you can take that."

Baudy had grabbed Paperweight's phone off the living room table and started flipping through it while he was speaking. She kicked her legs back and forth as she browed, showing off her butt and the thong inbetween every other movement.

"Decent stuff on here. Never heard of the Dame Megan's Band before though. They sound like dad-rock."

"How old did you say you were again?" Paperweight asked. He looked Baudy up and down twice while asking himself the same question in his head. How old did she look? Was it possible to have a filly's body with an adult mare's butt? Had science truly gone too far?

"Thirteen," Baudy said, sticking her tongue out from the corner of her mouth. "But I'll be thirteen and a half in April."

"You're barely older than my daughter..."

"Guess it'll be good to get out all those daddy-daughter issues by fucking me senseless then, huh?" Baudy flipped her laptop shut and tapped a track on Paperweight's phone's touch-screen. A slow, soft jazz took over the ambience of the apartment, with such an ambling, uncertain progression that it seemed the instruments were congealing out of shere coincidence rather than playing together intentionally. Baudy tilted her head back with her eyes closed and sighed as the sour saxophone notes mingled with each other and fought back and forth, refusing to harmonize cooperatively.

"Oh yeah," she said. "That's the good stuff."

Paperweight was tired of waiting, and for some reason seeing Baudy swept up in the current of a musical language he had never spoken lit a fire inside his loins. Yes, loins. We're in twenty-twenty, it's time to start saying 'loins'. Again.

"Oof... hey!" Baudy shouted and giggled as Paperweight lifted her up and propped her on the far end of the couch, her upper half hanging over and her butt straight up and squarely pointed in Paperweight's direction. He gave her cheeks a squeeze and kneaded them underneath her skirt, ruffling the fabric and causing Baudy to moan quietly into the couch-cushions. "Wait," she said. "Before you stick it in my ass, I was wondering if maybe you wanted to try something different..."

"Different?" Paperweight had already picked up his own bottle of lube and was squeezing a generous helping onto his erect cock, then spreading it up and down before adding another coat. Lube or no lube, he could tell one he shoved inside Baudy's little butthole, he was going to get all the friction he needed.

Though... different could be good.

Baudy nodded over her shoulder.

"Uh-huh. I could show you my special talent."

"What kind of special talent?" Paperweight stroked his shaft idly with one hoof, still eyeing Baudy's booty and twitching every time she bounced her cheeks up like two beautiful halves of marshmallow.

"My hardware. It can do tricks. I can download you."

"Download me?"

"Lemme show you," Baudy said.

She spun around on the couch so that she was lying on her back, facing towards Paperweight. She lifted up her skirt, revealing the red thong underneath, then pushed that to the side to, finally offering a proper peek at the telephony accessory in the place an average filly's quivering slit would be.

Even though he lived in Equestria, and was used to absurd happenings on a daily basis, Paperweight took a moment.

Huh, he said to himself.

Weird.

But... kind of hot?

"Look right there," Baudy said. She gestured with her hoof to a small circular spot in the center of her plastic protrusion. It's important to visualize here: the modem is inlaid, following her stomach up just a bit, and the rest is down between her legs, sunken into her pelvis. It doesn't protrude much, it's not like a dong, she doesn't have a futa-modem-cock. It's just a modem, and it's, like, kind of there, and look, really, if I was an artist, I'd draw you a picture. I really would. Please just do your best to visualize your own version.

But this special spot. I can help you with that.

As Paperweight stared at her, Baudy spread herself with both hooves and tapped at what, upon close inspection, could be revealed to be a black, plastic, circular cover to an identically-sized circular opening. Baudy lifted the cover, and a black hole peered back at Paperweight.

"That's my penis port," she said simply. "It changes size based on the... well, you know. And if you give me a little time—my download rate isn't the fastest, heh—I can learn all about you just from a little data exchange." She smiled up at him. "In fact, if you cum, I can make a full copy for storage, and remember you forever... heheh." She licked her lips, then scrunched up her face, as though she'd suddenly remembered a forgotten shopping list item. "Uh... sorry. Was that creepy?"

"A little," Paperweight said. "But I'm still interested. You're saying I just have to shove my dick in there—" he pointed incredulously to the small circular port on Baudy's modem, and she squealed and rocked her hips up at him as though he'd tickled her clit. "—and you'll be able to, like... know what my favorite colour is or something?"

"I'll be able to imitate you perfectly," Baudy said, smiling without blinking. "I'll know just what it takes to make you cum, over and over and over again, your deepest, darkest fantasies, the things you'd never tell anypony but want them to know so, so bad..."

"How do I sign up," Paperweight said. He pushed his cock forward curiously and prodded the tip at the entrance to Baudy's penis port, which made her groan and wiggle her hips back and forth.

Baudy giggled and stared down at the cock poised to slide into her tiny hole. "Easy," she said. "Just stick it in me real good." She put one hoof on either side of her port and made to spread wider, though that didn't seem possible with a piece of solid hardware. Still, maybe it was big enough to fit his cock in there... maybe?

"Come on," Baudy said. "Stick your big adult cock in my illegal, underage filly port."

"That sounded so perfect except for the last word," Paperweight said. "But fuck it. I'm as hard as I'm going to get. Ready to take this dick, you little code-monkey?"

"Ready for repeated driver installation, sir," Baudy said, smirking.

Without much else to wait for, Paperweight pushed his penis forward. It slid in past the tip, very tight, almost like someone was clenching around him with both hooves. If he slid forward, would more go inside? Only one way to find out...

"Oooh, that's it, nice and slow," Baudy said. She stared down between her legs as Paperweight slid his cock forward, the girth somehow vanishing into the apparently miniature port, the plastic cover hanging and dangling in a silly way off to the side. "Buck yes. Fill me up with that cock, Daddy."

This is so weird, Paperweight thought.

"This is so weird," Paperweight said. "Your ass looks amazing."

"Mhmm, yes Daddy, why don't you spank it for me?" Baudy wiggled her rump back and forth and smacked one of her own butt-cheeks with her hoof. "I've been a naughty girl... I downloaded a lossless music torrent and ran up our data bill again, mhmmm..."

"You want me to spank you?" Paperweight asked. Somehow the experience of meeting, finding, and fucking an underage filly with an out-of-this-world ass and modem-for-a-pussy was taking a heavy toll on him—not in terms of willpower, but just how long could he keep the thread of things before he turned into a horny, gibbering mess? He could already feel his hips screaming to move forward, his balls twitching and surging full up with cum... and he was still going slow, just because he didn't want to hurt the poor thing, or break her modem, or whatever...

But that was it. He was all the way in. He'd shoved his cock inside a port on the side of a modem attached to an underage filly.

It felt like she was sucking him dry.

Pulling back out was a struggle. So tight, and still so wet, whether it was the lube or some kind of unknown moisture being secreted inside, he didn't know and didn't care. All that mattered was how snugly she held his cock, squeezing every inch as he drew back his hips, and then clenching even harder when he slid in again, the pressure on his head so much he almost couldn't manage the first inch. Eventually, his cockhead slid in, and then the rest of his shaft, but it was an intense journey, gritting his teeth and groaning under his breath, and when he pulled back each subsequent time, he made sure to leave the head of his cock inside.

"Oh, buck," Baudy said. She reached a hoof down to the side of her modem and began gently twiddling a dial, slowly moving it from the lowest setting to the highest, then back down, each in gentle, rocking spurts of motion. "That feels so good. I feel like I'm gonna bucking factory reset if you keep doing that."

"Is that... good?" Paperweight asked between thrusts and grunts.

"Hell yeah!" Baudy said. She slapped her own ass again and giggled. "That means you fucked me up real good. Come on, go for broke. Bust a nut in my network card!"

Paperweight found his balls, which were slapping against Baudy's ass over and over again as he fucked her, and finally gave her butt-cheeks a few slaps as well, only one hard enough to leave a mark. Baudy squealed at each one regardless, and her eyes rolled back in her head in tandem with Paperweight's thrusts, hard enough to rock the couch and almost drown out the avant-garde horn-blowing.

"I'm gonna cum," Paperweight said. "It's standard practice in this part of Equestria to let everypony know that beforehand—er, beforehoof, just in case they want to have the load somewhere different, or just so they can be prepared in advance—"

"Shoot it all over my externals. I want the cum to drip into the exhaust port."

"Fuck," Paperweight said. He pulled out, already cumming, and sprayed Baudy down like he was painting the exterior of a house. A long pool of the spray dripped out and over the circular port in the center of the side of her modem, but a decent amount of it also went into the modem itself, sliding down the casing and clouding the lights, which were blinking back and forth in seemingly almost-random combinations of orange and green.

On the stereo, somepony who had been dead for a long time tried to make his instrument sound beautiful.