Hay is for Horses

by Holy

Rating: everyone
Tags: Comedy, Equestria Girls, Sunset Shimmer, Slice of Life
Length: 1695

Sunset has been in the human world for so long she's almost forgotten the taste of her favorite food, but an encounter with a few of Applejack's hay bales incites an uncontrollable urge within her to indulge in her old pony pastime.

Sunset has been in the human world for so long she's almost forgotten the taste of her favorite food, but an encounter with a few of Applejack's hay bales incites an uncontrollable urge within her to indulge in her old pony pastime.

Art Source | Support the author | Ko-fi

Published 2020-05-14 19:50:01 UTC
Last updated 2020-05-14 19:50:01 UTC

The Good Stuff

The evening breeze gently brushed through the trees and through the hills of Sweet Apple Acres, eventually blowing Sunset's hair across her back as well. Gravel crunched beneath her feet as she made her way off of the farm, though a little quicker now than her usual stride. The normally peaceful stroll back now had Sunset breathing heavily and her entire body on edge as she wished she could trot again without looking suspicious. Sunset's stomach twisted with every glance over her shoulder, expecting to have to cover for her strange posture. Thankfully her glances didn't reveal anyone there to catch her in the act.

Sunset's heart pounded as she squeezed her arms tighter around her core, making sure her score was still snugly secured in its hiding place. Memories of snatching snacks out of the convenience store when she first arrived in this world rushed back to her mind with the familiar feeling. She looked over her shoulder one last time to make sure she was alone on that long driveway out of the farm. The long curve away from the farmhouse was completely empty, and a quick crane of her neck over the surrounding hills revealed nothing but more apple trees. Stopping for a moment on the grass, Sunset finally decided it was time to indulge in her sinful urges.

A shaky hand reached underneath the leather adorning her chest to grab her prize. The anxiety building up in her torso was quickly replaced by a giddy excitement as she felt the familiar prickle of her score: a lump of hay.

Sunset pulled out her score and held it in both hands as if it was an injured bird. Her eyes shot around the farm one last time; Sunset's mind raced with potential consequences before she realized Applejack probably wouldn't even care. Sunset chuckled at herself and shook her head. She wasn't in Canterlot anymore and no one would miss a little swiped hay here, she told herself to quell the final bits of nervousness nipping at her. It's not like Applejack was going to be upset at her for swiping a handful from one of the bales, though... the rest of the kids at school wouldn't be so forgiving with the horse girl teasing if this got out. Sunset rolled her eyes at the memory of those playful pranks and the endless jokes at her horse history that only just finally died down, but with those wonderful strands finally in her hands Sunset can hardly bring herself to care about anything else.

A long, heavy sniff of the hay in her hands sent chills down her spine and a satisfied sigh out of her mouth. Sunset's entire body shivered at the thought of finally indulging in that savory snack again. So many sour days in her youth were brightened by that savory taste of warm, seasoned hay fries with a massive helping of ketchup and she couldn't wait to experience the rush all over again. Sunset knew if she was never concerned about her weight, a plate of delicious hay fries would be all she ever ate. Back in Canterlot, many bits were spent on overloaded plates, to the point it almost became an issue a few times. A sadness overcame her at the realization of how many years it'd been years since she enjoyed her favorite dish, but another quick whiff of the hay in her hands was enough to bring a bright smile to her face with giddy anticipation.

Sunset looked down at the lump and then looked up in thought of all the ways she might try it: A little at a time? No, she wanted a good mouthful... All at once? No... she wanted to savor it and definitely didn't want to have to risk going back to the barn for seconds, as much as she wanted to just drag a whole bale off the farm with her. The dry grass wasn't baked, fried, or seasoned either, but trying recipes at her apartment was time that Sunset didn't know if she could wai through. Her mouth was already salivating as hard as it possibly could and she grew fidgety in place with every passing second.

With another quick glance around the driveway to make sure she was alone, Sunset leaned her elbows onto a nearby fence to support herself, ready for the intense pleasure to wash over her entire body at the first taste. Not wanting to waste anymore time, Sunset smashed her face into the handful of grass and took a generous chomp out of it. Bliss her body with the smell so close to her nose and the chewy texture filling her mouth. A bright, happy smile came over her face as she chewed into the first bites, letting out an audible moan as the joyous nostalgia flooded in.

Sunset's excited chewing slowed as her smile gradually faded. The sharp prodding on the inside of her cheeks was manageable, but something felt... wrong. She chewed a little longer, wincing as her softer human mouth organized the strands into more comfortable areas. She did her best to savor every little bite as the flavor flooded into her mouth, but her stomach churned as the taste began to form in her mouth and at the back of her throat. Her tongue had a complete picture of the object in her mouth now, and her ecstatic anticipation slowly turned into uncertainty with each rotation of her jaw. Sunset coughed and brought a hand to her mouth to keep it in; her body reeled with a sudden disgust and yelled at her to spit it out.

As her teeth crunched the blades into a more palatable form, the ugly truth was finally revealed: the taste on her tongue was like sun-dried dirt and dead leaves. The sweet feeling of eating warm hay fries on a quiet afternoon vanished from her mind, replaced by memories of accidentally getting a mouthful of dirt on nasty falls or crunchy leaves making their way past her lips after getting lost in a massive pile her and her friends raked up last fall. Sunset's throat refused to open to allow the awful taste any further, and with a dissatisfied groan she let the pile of brown mush slide off of her tongue and down into the grass below her.

Sunset shook her head, her eagerness quickly washed over with disappointment as she looked at the rest of her meal in her hands. "Stupid omnivore taste buds..."

Her leather jacketed crinkled up as she slouched forward onto the wooden fence. The nostalgia drained out of her and left behind a somber yearning for her life when she could enjoy the disgusting livestock feed she was holding. Sunset tipped her palm over, letting the little strands fall away and catch the wind to fly away like all her pleasant memories fading towards bittersweet. Part of her mind screamed not to waste it, but the last thing she wanted was more of the taste that was currently poking at her gag reflex. Sorrow built up at the back of her throat as she stared out past the hills towards the encroaching darkness with a somber sigh. Sorrow for the life she used to have and all the little things she grew up loving. They were all literally in another world now, somewhere she knew she'd never belong in anymore.

Sunset leaned down to rest her head against the fence and stare across the rolling hills of apple trees before her. The little brown sticks finally settle into the grass a few yards away from her as she silently contemplated if trying to cook or season them would somehow make them better. She sat back as her mind desperately tried to find a reason to hold on, to keep them in her life somehow, some way, but as her mind projected the different tastes of her ideas into her mouth, she had to hold back another gag. Her stomach churned at the idea of having that nastiness in her mouth and if she was being honest, she thought she might rather actually have a mouthful of dirt instead.

A soft sigh left Sunset's lips and she turned around to face the last rays of the evening sun as they peaked over the apple trees. A sun not controlled by Celestia beaming down on the world she'd spent a good portion of her life in now. The hay sprinkled around the green grass was another loss to add to the list from her old life. Sunset's mind wandered towards her journal; Twilight wouldn't mind a quick visit to raid the Ponyville restaurants, would she? The urge still nipped at her mind despite her unsettled stomach. Sunset shook her head with a knowing smile as she pushed herself off the fence. Night was drawing closer and a sudden hay heist probably wasn't a great idea for a school night.

Sunset's mind drifted back toward her friends and all the strange restaurants they've explored around Canterlot. Her thoughts had urged her toward the portal like a magnet drawing her in, but Sunset took in a long, deep breath and cast the hay heist out of her mind. Instead she looked through her internal list of the endless unique human foods her palate had the luxury to once enjoy. As much as she missed her old favorite, Sunset knew she had plenty of new ones to pick from in her new home. Her elaborate binging session that would put most dragon hordes to shame would have to wait... for the weekend probably. Though it'd take a miracle to get the memory of that awful concoction of dead plants and dirt to leave her mind now.

Sunset spit out one last time to get that awful taste off her tongue, then let off a low chuckle at her own ridiculousness of her petty thievery. "I think I'll just order some Chinese instead."

Author's Note

Not my best work, but it was a fun little request to see if I could make something decent in the realm of comedy.