The Joke

The sound of hooves brushing against the ground filled the air around the dense forest. Grass crinkled and twigs snapped as a single pony trotted with a familiar, but uneasy, step. Fluttershy knew the Everfree Forest well, more than any other pony or creature for that matter, but it was never an easy task. The sight of twisted trees was all she was greeted with as even thicker trees above kept the midday sun hidden overhead. Breaks in the branches let strips of sunlight break through and it was enough to illuminate the path she traveled, but it did little to ease her fears.

The sound of timberwolves howling in the distance filled the once quiet air, and her pace quickened. They weren’t near, but she could tell it was a pack of five or more hunting and scouting deeper within. She hated seasons where they were more active, as it put all the creatures at her cottage on edge constantly, and it was for that reason she was out in the Everfree at all.

“Elizabeak!” Fluttershy called out, her voice no louder than the wind blowing through the trees. “Please come out!”

The howls faded swiftly and a silence filled the air in an almost eerie manner that made her regret going out alone. She had her doubts she would find her friend and debated running back to town to get some help, but as she broke through a large shrub blocking her path, she stopped in a small, open area.

It was a scenic view, a breathtaking one when beheld for the first time.. Before her was a small, enclosed field of flowers; the sound of flowing water made her ears perk up and her eyes swiftly followed to a small stream. As she turned, she let out a deep sigh of relief as the sight of a small white chicken busily drinking from the stream greeted her vision. Even with the chicken not looking in her direction, Fluttershy knew she found what she was looking for, but she quickly went back on full alert. Despite the field of flowers presenting a relaxing feeling, it was a trap that only the ill-experienced and less-traveled pony would miss. The flowers were a deep midnight blue, and thanks to her previous encounter with them, she knew they were better off not being touched. Poison Joke; a twisted creation of nature that would cause all sorts of oddities to whoever touched one.

The only things Fluttershy found odd were how many flowers were bunched up together (Considering poison joke only ever appeared in small batches) and even though they were a deep blue, they also had a slight reddish-pink tinge as well. She didn’t pay it much thought; it was still a poison joke by appearance, and it was meant to not be touched. Sadly, Fluttershy could see a path of flowers that had been walked upon by her feathered friend, and she knew she would have to obtain a remedy when she got home.

“Elizabeak, come here!” Fluttershy shouted as she walked to the edge of the large bed of flowers.

Despite her timid and quiet nature, the chicken heard her voice. She watched as its oddly shaped canine ears perked up, before the rest of its body rose up and turned around. As it did, Fluttershy’s eyes went wide before she sighed again. Though she looked like a chicken from the rear, the poison joke had seen fit to make it so her head resembled a dog. She looked a fair bit like Winona, in fact.

The chicken barked in return, before it turned its face back to the stream.

“Come here, you silly chicken! We gotta get you home and into the bath,” Fluttershy spoke out as she attempted to step forward, but stopped midair as her hoof dangled over the flowers. “Oh, horsefeathers.”

The chicken didn’t listen, and Fluttershy knew she would have to fetch the bird by hoof. A quick flex of her wings was all it took, and in a split second, she was up in the air and hovering in place, until she began to glide towards the chicken.

“Out of all the places you had to run to, you picked here,” Fluttershy grumbled as she stared at all the flowers underneath her. “Sometimes I wish I co-”

Awooo!!!

Snap!

Fluttershy tensed up mid-flight as the loud snapping of a branch filled the air, and her wings slammed shut. Before she could react, her butt landed on the flowers below with a hard thud, before the rest of her body fell back.

“Oh dear,” she gasped as her back hit the ground.

For a brief moment flowers surrounded her vision, until she quickly pulled herself up and took to the air. Though she was quick to remove herself from the flowers, she tried to mentally prepare for whatever strange effect was coming.

There was nothing, but Fluttershy knew better. Sometimes effects would take hold right away, and sometimes they would appear much later. The longer she would have to wait, the more bizarre and body-altering it would be.

“Please be something that isn’t overly weird,” she pouted as her eyes traveled back to her feathered companion.

As she flew closer, another branch snapped behind her, but thankfully distance between her and the bushes was moderate, and her reaction was mild as a soft ‘eep’ came out. Coming to a hover midair she turned around and prepared for something big and scary to jump out of the bushes. There was silence for a brief second, until a shrub started to shake, and Fluttershy felt a bit of anxiety build up in her throat. She waited, she watched, and she could only picture a pack of timberwolves that managed to sneak up on her, ready to pounce.

A flash of white jolted from it.

It was a bunny. Her bunny.

“Angel? What are you doing here?” Fluttershy sighed deeply as she relaxed, but couldn’t help but glare with annoyance. “You could have been snatched by the big, scary timberwolves prowling about.”

Angel glared back with an equally annoyed look on his face before he started to squeak repeatedly at her.

“Yes, I know you were worried about me, and yes I know I shouldn’t be wandering in the forest when they are hunting. But I couldn’t just ignore Elizabeak, now could I?” Fluttershy replied as she pointed to the chicken.

Angel focused where she was pointing and instantly cringed at the sight of the dog-faced chicken before he started to squeak again.

“Well, of course, she looks silly, but that's only because she ran into the joke flowers. Once we get home, she and I will have to take a bath.”

Angel cocked its brow and squeaked once again.

“Yes, I fell in the flowers, and no I don’t know what they are going to do to me. Anyhow, you stay there while I get Elizabeak so we can go back home,” Fluttershy said as she turned back in the direction of the chicken.

Angel sighed and crossed his forelegs before he impatiently stamped a foot against the ground.

***

A brisk breeze blew by as Fluttershy flapped her wings and flew in the direction of Ponyville. On her back rested her bunny, while she held tightly onto her chicken with her front hooves. She looked down at the tree line of the forest and couldn’t help but smile. Knowing she didn’t have to walk through it anymore put her mind at ease, even as she noticed the wooden silhouettes of wolves moving through the bushes.

Her companions were quiet as she flew, and with a steady breeze at her back, she could almost glide through the air without any troubles whatsoever. Despite that, she found herself starting to feel hot and sweaty as time trickled by. She tried to ignore it, thinking it was just the sun beaming down on her, but as the roof of her cottage came into view, she felt like the whole core of her body was vibrating with increasingly intense heat.

It wasn’t that kind of heat, she knew that feeling all too well, but the heat she was experiencing was very similar to how she felt when she first dealt with the effects of the poison joke flower. Last time it made her throat dry and hoarse, which ended up with her adopting the deep voice of a stallion. The feeling was similar, albeit in a much lower and more private part of her body, and she wiggled her hips to be rid of it.

As she flew, she winced as her thighs tingled and she felt the need to pant. Her face started to feel flushed, and the tingling sensation quickly turned into a numb buzzing feeling as it focused all in on her nether region. She wondered if the flowers had the ability to force a heat cycle, and she grew more nervous. Instinctively she felt her legs part and the feeling of something beginning to grow became apparent. She wanted to look, but with the chicken in her hooves, looking at whatever was happening between her legs wasn’t an option.

She felt something drop at her rear, but whatever it was, it felt like it was trapped under her skin. She gave her hind legs a shake, hoping to dislodge it, but as the sensitive flesh bounced against her thigh, she winced as a bit of pain shot through her. It was brief but she instantly realized there were two bits near the area and she grew more worried. Thankfully her home was near, and quickly steering herself downward, she landed on the ground.

“Now, head inside, Elizabeak,” Fluttershy said to the chicken as she took a deep breath and steadied herself.

The chicken nodded as it was released from her grip and quickly made a beeline for the house. As it did, Fluttershy felt Angel jump off her back as well, before he instantly let out a loud squeak.

“W-what is it?” Fluttershy asked meekly as she turned to the bunny and saw it staring wide-eyed at her rear.

Angel didn’t reply for a moment before his shocked expression quickly turned into a crooked smile. Laughter quickly followed as the bunny fell on his back and began to roll back and forth.

“Wait!? What do you mean its a-” Fluttershy’s face turned a crimson red as she lifted a hind leg awkwardly to stare at what the problem was.

Though she heard Angel laugh the words out, she never expected it to be real. What greeted her vision was a large set of low hanging stallion balls and a sheathe from which the tip of a penis was visible. She’d never seen a proper set in real life, but she had knowledge of what they were and what they did, yet seeing a set for the first time growing on her made her wish the flowers had forced a heat cycle instead. She looked away as her mouth went agape and her ability to breathe became nonexistent for a few seconds.

She felt an overbearing sense of shame and an unbridled amount of fear as a stiff feeling started to take effect in her new loins. Her body fidgeted and she felt the need to cover herself up with anything she could. She hugged her tail close to her butt, but as the soft hairs brushed against her new privates, the stiffening feeling increased and the head of her penis popped out from its hiding place. She winced and swallowed back her embarrassment before grinding her thighs vigorously in an attempt to shut down the feeling. It did nothing, and she let out a loud groan as she began to sit her butt down on the ground.

“This doesn’t feel right a—eek!” she spoke softly, but tensed violently as her rear met the cold grass.

She quickly pulled up and trembled as the sensation of the soft ground sent a shiver through her body. She stayed standing, afraid to move or do anything at all, in fear of any strange and overly unpleasant sensations that could follow.

Angel squeaked at her, causing her to lose her focus from her racing thoughts.

“Yes, I know I should go for a bath. Just... give me a second to umm, get used to it,” Fluttershy replied as she winced and squeezed her butt cheeks together. “Ugh, how do stallions walk with something like this all day? It feels so heavy and hard, and it even hurts a bit when you squeeze the… bits the wrong way.”

Fluttershy shook her hips and tensed as her low hanging bits slapped against her thigh before they bounced off each other. The way they moved reminded her of the grandfather clock’s pendulum Twilight used to have in her old library, and she couldn’t get the image of it out of her mind.

“Ooh, Fluttershyyy~” A feminine and very elegant voice sang out, making Fluttershy clinch her buttcheeks even harder than before.

She knew that voice very well, and just hearing it reminded her that she and Rarity had a spa date she was supposed to be ready for shortly. Even though she didn’t see her, Fluttershy knew Rarity was very close, and she silently began to hope and pray that her friend wouldn’t see her new stallion bits.

Tails were useful things in such a situation, but what helped most was that no matter how embarrassed she felt and looked, it didn’t really amount to more than what her friends were used to seeing from her. That left only her traitorous mouth to watch, and so long as she was careful, she could weather that problem as well.

“There you are, darling!” Rarity exclaimed as she rounded the corner of the house and could be seen from the vantage of the front of her home. “I got that yarn in from Canterlot, I thought I’d drop it off and pick you up for our spa date.”

The yarn was welcome, though Rarity’s reminder was needless. Fluttershy didn’t have many social engagements to worry about, after all. But she understood why Rarity would mention it, as it was something they both tended to look forward to.

The reminder today, however, was somewhat unwelcome. She needed to go to the spa, posthaste, of course, but not for their Usual, or at least not in the state she was in now. She’d need to get Aloe and Lotus to prepare the cure for her current predicament, and hopefully without revealing what had happened to her this time. If she could accomplish that, she could just bury this whole incident away as a bad memory, just like every other horrible thing that had happened to her in her life. “Oh, thank you!” she said, meaning it despite herself.

“You look troubled, darling,” Rarity asked much more inquisitively than Fluttershy found comfortable, as her friend stepped forward to close the distance. Fighting the urge to back away, Fluttershy instead forced a smile she didn’t feel.

Getting the cure would mean missing spending time with Rarity, and Fluttershy didn’t want to do that unnecessarily. Rarity needed that time to relax just a little.

“It’s nothing, really,” she said, flashing the fake smile again. Pinkie would have been so upset with her.

“Are you sure?” Rarity asked, taking another step forward.

Just a few more steps and Fluttershy was in real danger of Rarity closing the distance for a hug, and then it would be very difficult to avoid discovery. Fluttershy allowed her wings to dip just a little bit to her sides, trying surreptitiously to block the view of her undercarriage and actually taking a half step back. “Y-yes!” she said insistently.

Rarity stopped in place, eyeing Fluttershy for a long moment. “Darling,” she said eventually. “We promised, did we not? Something is bothering you, and I cannot know what that is, but it seems to be related to me in some way. Tell me what’s wrong, please?”

Fluttershy hesitated for a long moment, unsure of what to do. They had promised, and invoking that promise meant Pinkie would know, somehow, if she lied. She was in danger of upsetting two friends for the same problem. She had to say something.

“It’s... not you, but... it’s a bit embarrassing. I... I fell into poison joke while chasing after Elizabeak earlier—”

Rarity winced visibly. “Oh, dear! You’ll be needing a curative bath prepared then, won’t you? Not your voice this time, at least.”

“Not my voice this time, no...” Fluttershy said carefully.

“Well, that’s good luck at least. You have such a lovely voice, darling, and even if the other one is very pleasant as well it’s such a shame to not hear your real one. So, what happened, then?” Rarity asked with well-meant curiosity.

“I’m...” Fluttershy faltered, blushing. “It’s very private...”

“Too embarrassing? That’s all right. Say no more, darling. I shan’t pry,” Rarity replied with a nod of understanding. “Shall we reschedule for next week, then?”

Fluttershy considered for a long moment before answering. “I mean... we could still...” she paused, torn between wanting to please Rarity and avoid potential exposure. In the end, it was no real contest. Rarity was more important. “I don’t think I’d want a preening, and... maybe no massage, but the mineral baths would be okay, and the steam room...”

“Well, you could always keep me company during my horn filing and massage. It will give Lotus time to prep the bath.” Rarity said with a nod. “Worry not, Sweetness. I shall be the soul of discretion, nopony but you need know what transpired.”

Fluttershy’s fake smile fell away into the dust, to be replaced by a genuine one of relief. “Thank you!” she said, meaning it.