Hentai Horse in Magical Pony Land

<<>>

[Regret]

“I told you bud. I’m not upset at you, I’m still not upset. A little irritated maybe but not upset. Honestly it was fun and at least the Friendship Bukkake was useful. I mean the mana-core is fully repaired and operating above peak efficiency!”

[Agreement]
[Excitement]
[Data]

“Yeah that’s awesome bud. Now if only I had a way to utilize my mana-core externally that wouldn’t involve having a spike growing from my brain and through my skull.”

[Exasperation]
[Data]

“I know okay! I’m just not okay with something attached to my brain that’s exposed okay?”

I heard my CPU grumble before it did whatever it does when it wasn’t paying attention to me, probably playing with all the Harmonics data and trying to uncover the best way to utilize it along with my newly repaired mana-core.

Currently I was doing the promised roofing for Ruby Heart, I was also wearing a mass-negator harness so my hefty ass just doesn’t fall through the roof. Of course it also doubled as a pseudo toolbelt so that’s cool, granted I could easily drive nails (and possibly railroad spikes honestly) with my hoof but look a little professional never hurts you know?

I paused in my work and looked up at the clear sunny sky, say what you will about Dash but she’s a serious mare when it comes to weather management. The forecast said the skies would be clear for the next couple days as well barring any freak weather blowing in from the Everfree. And I just wanna say the Equestrian weather control thing (never mind the Day/Night cycle) still freaks me out a little.

“Mr. Steel! Care to come down for a drink!?” Ruby Heart called, turns out I did know her… I just didn’t remember seeing as I was pretty work-focused at the time.

I looked down to see the single mother with a tray balanced on her back with a pitcher of lemonade and two glasses. Checking my internal temp I decided now wouldn’t be a bad time for a break.

“Sure Miss Heart! Just go set that down and I’ll be down in a jiffy!” I replied before turning to make sure the shingles were properly secured.

“Okay!” I heard Miss. Heart reply.

After a few minutes of inspecting, and removing a nail that bent and replacing it with a straight one, I went to the edge and hopped down. My mass-negator ensured I just landed with a thud instead of a crater. Stretching out I yawned, man the weather is just perfect for a nap!

Pity I had a couple more jobs in line after this. Though maybe after I got to the library to check if any of the furnichure or bookshelves need repair maybe I can sneak in a quick nap before I head over to Rares to do some modeling for her… side business.

“Think you know a pony then *BAM* she takes you to a side room and you see BDSM for days and pink fuzzy shackles.”

Though I couldn’t help but feel like Rares was testing me for something. I mean she deliberately got me aroused and practically dared me, pity for her I have more control then that. I’m really not sure what prize that’s at the end of this game but I’m not going to lose… no matter how much time I want to at times.

Dismissing the thought I trotted over to Ruby Heart who was already pouring some lemonade, and… she flashed me on purpose. God… I wonder how thirsty this mare is? I mean, I get it but honestly. Most mares see my dick and will do anything but let me mount so god… fuck it. Just drink the lemonade and ignore the goddamn cocktease of a single mother.

“Thanks Miss Heart.” I said with a smile as I took the glass.

“Well it’s the least I could do.” She said with a smile.

“How’s Button doing?” I asked curiously.

He’s a nice colt, honestly reminds me of me when I was younger. I was pretty focused on video games and then later anime. So I understood how the kid thinks for the most part, actually I was pretty oblivious at that age too now that I think about it. God, I could’ve lost my virginity in high school if I just paid a bit more attention and wasn’t such a goddamn introvert!

“Oh he’s about as usual.” Ruby Heart said with clear fond exasperation, “More interesting in Ogres and Obilates then fillys. Oh and he’s really eager for the next gaming session and been asking about. Maybe you can set him up with the Crusaders? They’re sweet fillies and I’m sure they’d all get along!”

I just chuckled at the rather… ham-hoofed (I suppose) attempt at matching (or herding) as I took a drink, hmm a bit on the sweet side for lemonade but not bad.

“I’ll try Miss Heart.” I said, “I can’t promise anything though. If anything I think Sweetie and Button do look cute however.”

Honestly I wish I had some pictures of when Button was helping the girls, mostly Sweetie, build their characters. He didn’t try to impose the “correct” way or anything, just walked them through the process, helped them keep their characters balanced, and let them test out to find a style that suited them.

Though I’ll be completely honest I never expected Scootaloo to be a Cleric, Applebloom to me a Nuker Black magic, or Sweetie to be a Rogue Assassin.

I was the DM of course, and I was fairly generous without being a pushover. Though Button had to curb Scootaloo’s boisterousness on occasion, telling her “Never Taunt the Dungeon Master'' as DMs can be very spiteful if they feel offended before then explaining one nightmare of a session that included Snips and Snails.

Now Snips and Snails, they’re not really stupid or even ignormate. They’re actually fairly intelligent and surprisingly observant. It’s just that they’re… gullible as hell and not the swiftest on the uptake, and they have no filters between their mouths and brains. And during a lucky streak they were having I decided to punish them for their arrogance.

And I might’ve let a bit of human morbidity and spitefulness show seeing as I broke their characters down and turned them into gibbering mad husks.

Needless to say they didn’t let themselves get big headed again when I’m DMing!

Chuckling at all the fond memories of playing with Button I shook my head and finished my drink, “Well Miss Heart I’m almost finished. Honestly it was such a small job I think I shouldn’t accept my pay.”

“Nonsense. You’re a working stallion.” Ruby Heart said dismissing my words, “If anything you work too hard even though everypony knows you can take it. You really do need to take a “You” day at least on the weekends. You work harder than the local Guards.”

“Heh, well thanks Miss Heart but I like to keep busy. Keeps my mind from going to strange places.” For the most part it was all true, I just didn’t mention that it helped me vent my frustrations in a constructive manner.

Ruby Heart just sighed, “Celestia, are all Horses as stubborn as you?” It was rhetorical so I didn’t say anything, “Well have some more lemonade and I’ll get your payment.”

“Thank you ma’am.” I said politely as I poured myself some more of the oddly sweet lemonade, probably she added a bit too much sugar?

[Amusement]

<<>>

Ruby just waved as the local giant trotted off to his next job, and when he finally disappeared from her sight she just sat on her flanks and crossed her legs with a huff.

“That Love Honey didn’t even make him twitch!” Love Honey being a potent aphrodisiac that is the strongest that is commercially available, “Honestly I know his barn door doesn’t swing that way, I’ve caught him watching my plot often enough. Is he just that oblivious??”

Honestly she was glad her son was at the arcade, the thought of her beloved colt seeing her conduct herself in such a whorseish manner! Sun and Stars imagine just how the nags would gossip if they found out!

Ruby Heart blushed brightly before she decided to go in and relax. Momma is a little frustrated.

<<>>

“Seriously what is so amusing!?”

[Denial]
[Smug]
[Amusement]

Grumbling I made my way to the Treebary, still shocked that Twilight was allowed to live there but then again it honestly suited her. Sure she’s kind of a stickler but damn if she could unwind and let her mane down I bet she could bucking own the Sexy Librarian look! It’s just a pity she probably never would.

Fanon makes Twilight out to be a bundle of neurosis, borderline out of control OCD, and a smidgen autistic like Albert Einstein was. And I can confirm the OCD thing at the very least, as she sent me a notarized parchment listing everything single thing she needs me to check. Sorted according to priority. Oh and an estimated total she would be paying me using a stipend she gets from being Sunbutt’s prized student and teacher’s pet.

If that isn’t OCD I’ll eat a goddamn saddle! Granted I probably could but well… you know.

Shaking my head I knocked on the door, which was opened by Spike.

“Oh!” Spike turned and yelled “TWILIGHT! THE MAD STALLION IS HERE!!!”

“Well… he’s not wrong…” God if this was an anime I would’ve had such a massive sweatdrop right now.

I was saved by a very… unhinged Twilight and damnit I knew this wasn’t going to be straight forward.

“And I was looking forward to that nap…”

[Amusement]

“Fuck off you smug shit!”

[*Cackles*]

“This is all Twilight’s fault somehow. I just know it.”

“Come on we have a lot of work to do! Come on hurryhurryhurry!” The increasingly volatile Twilight said.

I cracked my neck before I entered, having to duck my head under the door frame.

Why do I feel like I’m stepping into a Mad Scientist's lair?

Oh wait- this is Twilight Sparkle… goddamnit…

“Dear Celestia! You look exhausted darling!” Rarity exclaimed, “I didn’t think that was possible.”

“I had Twilight. In full OCD mode. Micromanaging. Everything.” I said flatly, “So… can we just chill? I really don’t feel up to modeling after that… job.”

Rarity, God (Celestia, Luna, Buddha whatever) Bless her generous heart! She nodded and I headed straight to a couch I specially reinforced to take my weight after I caused the original to collapse. She of course would’ve simply dismissed it but I got her! Asking why I should accept her generosity if she can’t accept mine?

Oh she blushed so brightly after that!

Anyway I just eased down on the couch, not so much as physically exhausted but mentally. I tried not to let my frustration at Twilight get the better of me, I really did. I think I made it almost a quarter through the list before I snapped at her.

I told her that she hired me to do the job and that I’ve done this sort of thing all the time. And I’m not sure if it was my tone of voice or what but she calmed right down and actually shifted around awkwardly before she slinked off to her room.

I didn’t see her for the rest of my time there and I finished a lot sooner than expected. Granted Spike was annoyed but understanding, telling me that he would bring my fee to me tomorrow as he wasn’t allowed to handle large sums of money.

I just nodded, patted the little guy on the back, before I left.

I was pulled from my thoughts by Rarity with a large gallon of ice cream and two spoons.

“Well darling after I’ve had a particularly stressful time I always enjoy a little comfort food.” She said with a pleasant smile.

“Rares you are a Saint and too good for this world.” I said making her giggle.

She sat down beside me and for the next hour we just chilled and talked.

It had been a long day, but damn was it good to be home!

Trotting in I decided to see if any breakthroughs have been made in my mana-core project, sure I could’ve easily gotten the data via wireless update but it’s the little things, the little inefficiencies, that remind me that I’m not just a soulless logical machine.

Trotting in I greeted myself, “So any breakthroughs?”

“Nope. Sorry, but if we want to start using magic like a unicorn we’ll have to allow one to grow.” Myself said, “But we already knew that didn’t we?”

“Yes… yes we did.” I sighed, “But a guy can hope you know?”

“Well we know the old saying. You can wish in one hand and shit in the other. Guess which will fill up faster?” Myself said cheekily.

“True.” I said, “Well I’m going to get some sleep. Try not to work all night okay?”

Myself just rolled my eyes before turning back to his work.

“God I’m an asshole sometimes.”

[Snark]

“Oh shut up!”

Grumbling to myself I headed to my bedroom to get some much desired sleep. I didn’t dare hope for tomorrow lest I jinx things.