It wasn't as though you ever really got used to it—living in Equestria, that is. The little things that made up parts of every day on terra firma drifted away like fragments of a dream, recollections of a past you'd once walked as firmly as brick hallway, now mostly just fuzzy recollections and portions of paintings arranged out of order. A face you'd be sure to remember for the rest of your life would one day drift into the storage compartment. Names would sound alike, and only the smiles on faces would help you navigate from day to day.
Samantha liked Equestria. It was, as a general rule, less complicated than her life on Earth had been. Ponies, by nature, didn't seem to enjoy complication. They liked a world that was straightforward and communicated its intentions without duplicity. Possibly this was why there was such a perpetual kerfuffle over mating in Equestria—everypony wanted to do it, and do it simply, but had no means of joining one end of the equation to the other.
It was a Thursday evening. Samantha was at home with a glass of imported wine and a romance novel she'd been chipping away at for the last few weeks. A simple-but-beautiful earth pony is displaced from Equestria to Earth in medieval times, and has to combine her intuitive know-how with help from the locals to survive. Will she ever discover a way to return to her own time and place—or find a love which makes her stay? Samantha had been guessing at the conclusion herself every night before bed. In the end, she preferred something involving a time machine, as that was the most efficient, and lead to the highest volume of sequels.
Rosy Dawn was beside herself with worry. On the one hoof, the new creature, this 'man', was astounding, built differently than any creature she'd previously been acquainted with, towering tall over her like a mythical giant. And while she longed deeply to return to her home, her family and friends which she'd so suddenly left behind... Rosy Glow couldn't help but imagining, in her deepest, darkest, secretest of imaginings, what life would be like if she decided to stay with the human.
If she decided to stay, and let love bloom, in a time between Humans and Hay-Fields.
Samantha wrinkled her nose and took a sip of wine. She hated when the book went out of its way to drop the title somewhere in the middle like that.
Knock knock, came two knocks at the door.
Who's there?
No, you're supposed to say 'Who is it?'...
Samantha folded off the top-right corner of her page, ever the scandalous rulebreaker of the de facto librarian world, then set her book down next to her glass of wine, on the small oak table she'd gotten made a few months ago. She took a moment to adjust herself before getting up; brushing hair into place, making sure her shirt wasn't tucked into her pants—the basic 'appearance groomers' that were still in place since growing up twenty-plus years in conventional human society. Even if ponies didn't notice, you caught yourself doing it anyway, just to feel like you were still at home.
At one point she'd read a study, published several centuries ago, by a pony with a very hard to pronounce name she could no longer remember, about the effects of pony and human cohabitation. Apparently a girl named 'Megan' served as a test-case... In any event, the end predicted result, according to this word-sandwich pony, was complete and total insanity. Utterly irreversible. Often fatal.
So far, after just over a year, Samantha had noticed none of the predicted symptoms. She had, however, noticed an increase in general life quality. Many friends, many more days on which she felt needed and necessary.
An initially sharp decline, then still worryingly slow climb when it came to—
Well, that was what she had her romance novels for, after all.
Still, eventually she did get up. And she did go to the door, and answer it, and see 'who could it be at this hour?', which was in fact 6:45PM, and therefore a highly reasonable hour for somepony to be calling anyway. Possibly the context of life fell away when you were deeply immersed in love-crossed scandals spanning species and timeline.
It was Derpy. Was she the only pony in this town who delivered mail?
"Hi!" Derpy said with an envelope between her teeth. She'd had a lot of practice, and her talent to sound discernible with a mouthful of paper was nothing to scoff at. Whether it was related to bubbles was somepony else's jurisdiction.
"Oh. Hello, Derpy." Samantha felt like she'd forgotten something, maybe a burner left on in the background, though she hadn't cooked anything on the stove in days. Take-out was far easier, and you got to chat with the delivery pegasus as well, which could serve as a good substitute for company when you were really lonely.
"I've got a letter for you," Derpy said after she'd spit the letter out into her hoof. She held it forward for Samantha, smiling obliviously as though the tiny drop of spit wasn't hanging precariously off one of the corners.
"Thanks." Samantha grabbed it by one of the few unsoaked corners and held it at arms length.
A lavish, unadorned silence of a single minute passed by. Derpy smiled obliviously throughout, standing in place on Samantha's doorstep and ignoring the single awkward cough that Samantha forced out at the halfway mark.
"Well," Samantha said, "I guess I'll be going then."
"Okay," Derpy said. She continued to stand, and smile.
"Bye for now," Samantha said.
"Bye!" Derpy said. Standing, smiling.
Samantha was very careful to close the door slowly, so as not to either hit Derpy directly in the face, or knock her off the front-step with a particularly volatile puff of air.
Samantha waited about fifteen seconds before peering through her front-door peephole.
A grey pegasus with a silly smile was there staring back at her.
"Derpy," Samantha said, "are you still standing on my front step?"
"Yep!"
"Do you mind telling me why?"
"Oh... good point."
As though her incomprehensible motivator had been forced into a surreal checkmate, Derpy nodded, doffed her postal hat, and took off with a series of frumpy-looking wing-pushes, toggling her weight between either side before leveling out after the third or fourth bounce and bounding away into the sky.
Samantha watched through the peephole until the grey blob had disappeared. She allowed herself one drawn out, indulgent sigh, before taking herself and her new letter back to the living room, where her glass of wine was still waiting. She took a few sips after sitting, in no more of a hurry to open the letter than Rosy Dawn was to return to her own time and place. A nagging voice from a distant past of college literature classes whined at her to examine the situation for applicable metaphors. She ignored it by finishing her glass of wine.
"Let's see," she said to herself as she picked up the letter. Talking to yourself was a habit everypony seemed to develop in Equestria, and Samantha wasn't immune despite her species variance. The writing on the front of the envelope was swirly, but highly legible, and Samantha found herself scanning a small, but accurate mental dictionary of hoof-writing she'd encountered previously. Not meticulous and regimented enough to be Twilight's, not nearly chaotic enough for Pinkie Pie... no hearts for the dots, so not her old pal Cheerilee... Samantha didn't feel like guessing any longer. She ripped the envelope open at the side, lacking a proper letter opener, and slid the contents out onto the oak table. It was, predictably, a letter, which she unfolded, and began to read.
It was brief, content-wise. Regardless, Samantha smiled after only a few lines, and even laughed when she'd finished reading. She read the letter a second time, bobbing her head a little as she bounced over each syllable, murmuring some of the lines to herself at barest minimum volume, a vibration that was barely detectable even by her own ears.
When she'd finished reading the letter a second time, Samantha set it down on the table. She poured herself a second glass of wine, a swirl of rich, dark cherry colour, and downed half of it in one go, closing her eyes as she swallowed and opening them as she finished. Her eyes held new, bright sparkles, as brilliant as the wine.
"That," she said to herself, "sounds like exactly what I need right now."
She took a little time to finish the rest of her second glass, then poured herself a third and began to write a reply. By the time she finished it, her third glass was gone, and she felt pleasantly buzzed on the way up the stairs to bed, where she tossed around the words of her reply in her head for a while, searching to know she had chosen the best arrangement, before giving up and masturbating twice, in the favorite way she liked to do, with a big pillow stuffed between her legs, clenching and grinding on it like she'd done when she was a horny and confused middle-schooler without access to proper sex-toys. Even now, with a range of dildos to choose from, person to pony and everything inbetween, she still found herself drawn to the familiar comfort of that old, squishy pillow, rubbing against her clit as she rocked back and forth on top of it.
One more, she caught herself saying, breathless and sweaty. One more, and then I'll go to sleep.
Dear Pony Penthouse Forum...
I remember hearing somewhere in the past that tales of sordid romance are best told 'from the horse's mouth', so to speak. It's impossible to be completely immune to the equestrian puns after you spend enough time here, they practically seep into your bloodstream...
I also remember hearing somewhere that it's best to start a story at the beginning. Consider that bit out the window. Ish.
I followed the invitation's instructions for a Friday evening get-together, the same as you might attend the directions of one of Pinkie's party invites, albeit with less chaos and presence of confetti. The walk through the Everfree was alarming if you let the timberwolves growling in the shadows alarm you, but whether human or pony, they were just as afraid of you as you were of them, and if you were a strange-looking, clothing-wearing thing walking upright, it stood to reason they remained better off growling where they were than emerging to make any undue trouble.
Taking walks in Equestria is nice in general. You get a whole new sense of the world above and below you, when there are barely any skyscrapers to challenge the clouds, and the earth is paved by hoof instead of concrete vomited in stripes like a grey, infinite tongue. You can wave or smile to anypony you pass, and expect a wave or smile back. Certainly a lot nicer than the human neighbours back on Earth, who would either frown or pretend they hadn't noticed you in the first place.
You can make friends with almost everypony too. Even though it was a week and bit until the third Sunday of the month, spending time with Cheerilee was a guaranteed stress reliever to look forward to. And whenever she was busy, I could just go into town, grab a sandwich or coffee and make small-talk with whomever happened to be sitting nearby. None of the interactions feel perfectly complete—there's always a little something, whether it's one side of your best friend, or just the things you can't share in public... it's hard to find that special balance of sharing yourself all at once.
Zecora's hut looked wonderful—creeping vines growing through the windows and back out onto the roof. Everything looked made of Everfree native materials, though that was probably as expected, given pony proclivity to make such good use of their surroundings. It's one of many things I've started to admire in a more permanent way since ending up here. I've got a list somewhere, someplace. I'll find it later.
Knocking at somepony's door still feels weird, just because they'll open it up and find a sorta-embarrassed looking human standing there instead of a pony at eye level. Some ponies are tall, but humans are taller than almost all of them, and the whole 'wearing clothes' thing always feels weird, like an inversion of normal human principles. Ponies go around naked to show they don't have anything to hide, but whenever they put on clothes, it suddenly becomes a game of mystery and disguise and keeping certain bits just out of view, and that's something that makes a bit more sense from a human perspective. Only, what does that mean for me, walking around wearing clothes all the time, every day? Like I'm waiting for somepony to yank them off me and see what's underneath.
So I knocked, and Zecora opened the door.
"Samantha, my friend, what a pleasure to see you," Zecora said, smiling broadly as she opened the door. "Could you please come inside, and help measure this beetroot?"
I blinked. Zecora's rhyming sounded more strained than usual. Maybe I'd shown up to a conversation already ongoing.
"'beg pardon?"
"Don't mind her," somepony said—a sharp, sassy mare from far back enough in Zecora's hut—is it rude to call it a hut? house, then—that I couldn't see them. "She's just having a bit of trouble with self-expression since committing to multi-syllabic rhymes."
"Poly," said another voice, this one a low but tender stallion's, equally impossible to locate through the clutter of tables, cooking supplies, and hovering smog inside Zecora's house.
"Huh?" came the mare's voice again.
"Poly," the stallion said back. "It's 'polysyllabic'. You're mixing your 'etyms'."
"Shush. That's not the point. The point is poor Zecora doesn't take criticism well, and all the ponies complaining about her rhyming have gotten her stuck for a bit. Isn't that right, dear?"
"I must confess, I know not what you mean," Zecora said. She was still barring way to the entrance, though I suppose I could have stepped over her like a little baby pony at the petting zoo. That seems kinda rude though. "Perhaps it's true, the... the... the stove-top wasn't... green?"
"Sweetie, take it down a notch," said the mare, her voice drifting a little closer through the permeating wall of smoke. "Two syllables is plenty. Most ponies just want an end rhyme. You're thinking about this entirely too much."
"Supply me a... group-hug?" Zecora managed, squinting her eyes close and scrunching up her face.
"Oh, hun. Come here. We'll get through this." A pair of forelegs appeared behind Zecora from the smoke, and another, both standing tall enough that they looked close to my height already. I'd just showed up, but hey, who can say no to a group hug. So I joined in, and there were four of us smooshed up on the doorstep before I'd even gotten inside. Ponies like hugging, and I'm glad for it.
"Thank you," Zecora said, sniffling a little bit. "Though it's not why I've called you here, I suppose now you know my fear."
"There you go!" the mare shouted. "Just one syllable, back to your old tricks again. That's all it takes. See?" She patted Zecora on the back, and in doing so, finally emerged enough from the circulating smog that I could get a proper look at her.
Now, firstly, I haven't lived in Ponyville a long time. Just long enough to witness a singular change of government, which doesn't account for much. Mayor Mare doesn't seem to be going anywhere. Anywho.
The point is that I haven't seen every type of pony or pony-type-creature under the sun. I've met zebra before, sure, I've met Zecora, if that counts... but yeah, she was kinda my 'one zebra friend' before this party. I'm gonna go ahead and call it a party, because once I tell you what happened, you'll probably agree it fits the bill.
This girl was thick.
I love using that word. Thick. What about with two 'c's, t-h-i-double-c; THICC. They're both good. Both big, bouncy, evocative descriptors.
She had a butt like a set of body-pillows. No, wait, I'm not doing this in the right order.
She was tall, like I thought. Not as tall as a human, that's understandable, but she barely had to look up at me to catch me in the eyes, and I was staring back at her the second she came into view, because I've never seen anypony, black, white, or any other colour, that seemed to be curved in every direction. Any way you looked at her, there was a spherical horizon waiting to taper into the distance. Her butt jiggled behind her when she walked, which she did right towards me, and it did, a lot, and it's really hard not to stare at somepony or somezebra's butt when they're walking towards you and it's big enough to see bobbling up and down like that. It's like trying to have a quiet, serious conversation with someone while there's a bouncy cheerleader in the background screaming "Booty, booty, booty!" over and over and over again.
Cough. Ahem.
Well, I did my best not to stare the entire time. I even managed to say 'hi', at some point.
Probably like, "uuuhhheello?"
She laughed, but it didn't make me feel bad. Just a little embarrassed, the way you naturally got when you were in the locker room and one of the popular girls with overdeveloped hips giggled and patted you on the butt...
What, that hasn't happened to everyone?
"Hey," she said, and gave me a little nod while extending her hoof.
I took it. Felt like kissing it, for some reason. I think you're just supposed to shake though? So that's what I did. She seemed pleased, and smiled back.
"Hey," I said. Tried not to think about the fact that it's technically a horse pun. Failed, and stifled a little giggle completely unrelated to the stacked-up booty-queen currently making my acquaintance. "My name's, uh, Samantha."
"T'ixixi," the mare said. She kissed my hand, which threw all notions about 'hoof-shaking' out the window for the foreseeable future. I made a mental note about it. Her name, though, it was a bit difficult to—
"And that's pronounced... 'T'ixixi'?"
She nodded.
"Yeah. It's in our native tongue."
Zebrish?
Let's pretend I just know all the correct Equestrian terms for things whenever I don't. And let's pretend I asked Cheerilee to help edit this thing for me later. Please? I'll give you a back-rub. :x
"Ah. Well, that make sense." I smiled at her, doing my best to hide the perpetual blush that comes with meeting somepony new, even if I know exactly what I'm doing, which in this case I didn't. "I thought I heard somepony else back there with you?"
T'ixixi nodded. She wasn't wearing anything, it might be important to note at this point, or not wearing an outfit, per se, but maybe what counted as 'accessories', a gold collar around her neck that matched Zecora's, hoop ear-rings that looked made of an ancient, colour-blended wood. And... well, I wasn't staring, anyway. I promise. But her butt... it seemed like she was wearing the slightest, smallest, thinnest, most imperceptible thong underwear. Like a little red highlight just barely covering... well, I couldn't see if they were covering anything, from here. Maybe when she turned around everything would basically still be on full display? The colour caught your eye, anyway, if the butt didn't.
Butt. Butt.
I tried to focus on the fact that conversation exists and is practiced by human and pony alike. That, and I was still standing on Zecora's front-step.
"May I come in?" I asked. I brushed a strand of hair out of my eye, catching myself calling it my 'mane' in my head. It all started to blur together after enough time here.
T'ixixi nodded, and Zecora did the same, standing behind her and enjoying a cup of a strange-looking orange brew, steaming up from the cup which she was holding in both hooves. The stallion still wasn't in view, he was lurking somewhere around the cauldron pouring out the thick volumes of smoke.
Once I got in, they shut the door behind me. The smoke felt a little oppressive at first, a little bit like a campfire indoors, but once I inhaled, I noticed it didn't seem to bother my lungs at all, and maybe even made me breathe a little clearer. It felt like the smoke was tinged with sparkles of a missing, ethereal flavour, and no matter how many mouthfuls I swallowed in the process of breathing, I couldn't quite place the taste.
"Thanks for inviting me over," I said to Zecora. She seemed calmed down now that other ponies were handling the dialogue, and the drink she was nursing seemed to be helping even further. She smiled back at me, and for a moment it was just a normal get-together, though organized on rather short notice and with participants I barely knew.
"So," I said, the 'awkwardly' hovering in potential adverbial space over my words and threatening to loom down and consume them whole.
"Oh," T'ixixi said. Still trying to describe her voice exactly, it sounded like a pineapple sundae? Bit closer, but still not perfect. "You should meet Din'de too. He's the other guest for the evening."
"'ello," came the gruff, calm baritone through the smoke. As I stared, a set of features emerged, those attached to a tall-standing, hulky-looking zebra stallion with more muscle on him than Big Mac could boast on a good workout day. Big muscles and an even bigger.
"Oh my gosh." I kind of said it without thinking. 'God' fell out of fashion once you had to explain to the tenth pony what you meant, and 'oh my Celestia' just didn't roll off the tongue anywhere near as well. Some verbal responses are just programmed, automatic, visceral reactions. You see a cock bigger than somepony's foreleg, dangling between a new acquaintance's legs, still soft, a voice inside you yelled about it and your mouth probably opened whether or not you wanted it to. I managed to contain myself to three words. The blush on my face was the other half of the equation.
Behind me, T'ixixi laughed loudly.
"Don't feel bad," she said, and gave me a pat on the back. She traced her hoof along the small of my back, and it felt good, not really any different from a hand massaging me in the same place. "Din'de has that effect on most people when meeting for the first time."
"You'll find yourself practically uninterested in a matter of minutes," Din'de said, his voice slow, a tad lazy. "Unless you're the type to fixate on somepony's material talents."
"Material... talents?" I took a quick look at his cutie mark, but it was a zebra symbol I couldn't translate, and probably would have misinterpreted regardless. Cutie mark discernment was more art that science.
Din'de rolled his eyes and nodded. T'ixixi giggled and held a hoof to her mouth, which failed to suppress even a little of her laughter.
"Don't mind him," T'ixixi said playfully. "He just gets grumpy whenever somepony finds out what his name means in Equestrian. It's related to his cutie mark."
"Oh." I waited for somepony to clue me in with an explanation, and, after realizing nopony was going to do so, added: "I don't recognize the symbol. Could you translate it for me?"
Din'de sighed loudly.
"Really? We're just finished with introductions, and already this?"
T'ixixi could barely suppress her laughter to speak, but she managed even through Din'de's glares.
"It means... hee-hee! Well, roughly translated, it means... 'beef-cake'."
"...beef-cake?"
T'ixixi broke into a fit of giggles so strong she couldn't speak anymore, and had to hold onto Zecora to avoid tumbling to the ground. Even Zecora started laughing, apparently healing quickly from her multi-syllabic rhyme-sores.
Din'de looked unimpressed, but he seemed to take the whole thing in stride. What a good sport.
"Alright, fine, everypony get it out," Din'de said. "Yes, my cutie mark and name effectively render me a big zebra dick-steak on a silver platter, yes, my destiny is both ironic and hilarious, yes, please continue your uproarious hilarity."
"Oh come on," T'ixixi said, grabbing Din'de around the shoulders and grinning at him. "Where's your sense of humour?"
"I'm afraid I left it in the same place as anyone who thought naming a pony after their penis was a proper idea."
"Pfft... you said 'penis'!"
Even I couldn't help it anymore. And holding onto Zecora for support while laughing meant holding on to T'ixixi for support while laughing, which meant... well. You know.
Butt.
"When you're all done, we could get on with the evening's plans," Din'de said. He was leaning up against the cauldron in the center of room, and had evidently scooped himself a cup of smokey orange-stuff without anyone noticing. "Or we could continue to joke about my hilarious name and origin." Pause. "As we do every weekend."
"Hey, cool guy, there's no rush to get anything started," T'ixixi countered. She grabbed for his cup of orange stuff, which he pulled away, leading her into another fit of giggles. "Things start on their own; naturally, when everypony is comfortable and feels like they know each other well enough."
"Or it can start with a blindfold, Zecora's salve, and the sensation of being pounded into borderline unconsciousness."
"I prefer to stay conscious for my fucking, thanks," I said. It was hard to keep up the pace of the conversation with all the new elements in place, but after enough practice, you can tell when somepony's talking about sex. S-e-x SECKS. You know.
That got their attention. Zecora seemed used to the banter, but apparently neither Din'de nor T'ixixi had heard a human quip like that before, or about the subject of sexy stuff. It always set the bare notion of interspecies shenanigans in everyone's mind, and from there, it was only a delicate slide downward until the act itself. Just so long as everything was navigated calmly and carefully...
Or T'ixixi could grab me by the back of the head and start kissing me with orange-cauldron-punch-taste still on her tongue. I've never objected to going from first-meeting to frenching without much distance between the two, but this was one forward Zebra, and yes, I got two good handfuls of both buttcheeks once we started making out, it was painfully easy to just wrap my arms around and grab 'em, and then start squeezing, two jiggly pillows smooshing underneath my fingers. Yes, I am unashamed, I went right for the zebra butt. May a stronger person in my place some day make a different decision. I was weak. And the ass was fat.
T'ixixi broke the kiss after she'd gotten a good taste of the inside of my mouth, and felt me moan more than once as she nibbled at my lower lip. It was hard to look her in the eyes without feeling all flush and warm, and she licked her lips while staring at me, which sent a long, lingering shiver right down my back. When she opened her mouth, I expected giggles, whether or not they were there, ringing like bells in the background.
"Mhm," she said with a nod in the direction of my hands still squeezing tight on her zebra-buns. "I guess a butt's a butt, whether pony or person."
"I guess it is," I said. Doing my best to contribute to the conversation while essentially spending the majority of my focus on T'ixixi's booty. Squeezing it, squishing it, rubbing and massaging and wondering what it'd look like bouncing up and down in front of my face.
Din'de's breath on the back of my neck was a surprise, but a welcome one. He managed to slide into place just like that, and I could even feel his extra big 'talent' pressing up against my butt, the most pronounced form of arousal and interested I'd ever had shoved directly into my ass.
"So," he said, nibbling gently at my earlobe. "This is your first party with Miss Zecora?"
I nodded first, finding it easier than scooping the words out of my chest, but then realizing no matter how flush and swept away I was, some baseline communication might be important until at least my clothes had disappeared.
"Yeah," I said, sounding more breathless than I wanted. "It is."
"I trust, then, that you're unfamiliar with Zecora's personal brand of... 'party favor'?"
I blinked. Thinking was hard with a big zebra butt in one direction and a big zebra cock in the other. Somehow I'd gotten smushed between them, and it seemed like the pattern would eagerly repeat itself many more times before the night was over.
"Uh... what?"
T'ixixi giggled and gave me a peck on the forehead.
"Don't mind him. He talks all fancy because he's overcompensating." She kissed me on one cheek, then the other, and I'm sure my face got even brighter. "He just wants to know if you've had any of Zecora's 'size-salve' before."
"Oh." Blink, nod, try desperately not to start grinding your ass backwards and begging for a rutting before the conversation is even over...
"You haven't, have you?"
Oh. Blink, nod.
"No, I haven't."
T'ixixi smiled. Even though I couldn't see him behind me, I could tell Din'de was doing the same.
"This oughta be fun," he said.
"And how," T'ixixi said.
"Zecora," Din'de called, "you do have a batch ready for tonight, don't you?"
Zecora nodded, and, as though she'd been waiting just conveniently off-screen to be necessary, handed over a small, unopened jar, which Din'de unscrewed and sniffed to sample.
"Yep," he said. "Smells like Zecora's."
"Before we get started, have you had anything to drink?" T'ixixi asked. She was still a fixture of bounceable booty, but she moved a little bit to let me feel less squished, which I wasn't entirely sure was necessary.
"No," I said, "although I've been smelling that orange stuff all night so far. What's in it?"
"Just oranges," T'ixixi said, pouring me a cup of the colorful bubbly liquid. "Well... mostly oranges."
"Zecora's had a thing against oranges until just recently," Din'de said. "Now that she learned about 'foreign', though, she seems a lot more comfortable around them."
"Is it like an alcohol or something?" I asked. The cup felt light in my hand, and the smokey fumes drifting up from the orange concoction smelled a bit like cream soda.
"Not really," T'ixixi said. Her mouth was close to my ear as she was speaking, it seemed to have a habit of drifting there naturally, and the shivers running up my spine were becoming more or less constant. "It's just a drink to help lower your inhibitions. No headaches, no dizziness, no hangover the next day... better than alcohol, in my opinion."
I took a sip. It did taste a lot like oranges.
"Now," T'ixixi said, "do you wanna see what Zecora's magic salve is all about?"
I nodded.
"Uh-huh. I'm guessing it's something sex-related?"
Oops. I put my hand to my mouth, the way you do when you realize you've just said something your brain meant only to think. That orange stuff worked fast. I barely even felt the flush of embarrassment that normally comes after blurting out something a little too honest.
T'ixixi and Din'de both smiled and nodded.
"Mhm-hmm. Would you like us to give you a demonstration?" T'ixixi asked.
I nodded. Took another sip of my orange stuff, which was definitely beginning to grow on me. Sparkly creamsicle, maybe.
As it was happening, I became vaguely aware of T'ixixi unbuttoning my shirt, which was admittedly a little above the dress-code of the evening anyway. Normally when someone or somepony reaches for your clothing and starts helping you strip without asking, you find yourself responding in a negative and immediate fashion. This time, I just let myself watch it happen, enjoying the fact that a pony (or zebra) could somehow manage all those buttons with just their mouth and tongue. Just goes to show that ponies might be particularly talented in that area...
"There," T'ixixi said as she popped open my last button and let my shirt hang open. "Let's let those sweater puppies out for a run."
I giggled, swallowed the last of my cup of orange stuff.
"Ponies know 'sweater puppies'?"
"Oh yeah," T'ixixi said, smirking. "Though, in a matter of seconds, those are gonna grow up to be full-blown hound-dogs..."
"Huh?"
T'ixixi undid my bra with her hooves, another feat of equine dexterity I considered worthy of admiration. It wasn't anything I needed to react to, I'd come over practically hoping for a night of illicit interspecies entertainment, but going from that vague desire to the actual act of a big-butted zebra taking your tits out to look at and ostensibly play with was a little jarring in its immediacy. The orange stuff really seemed to help take the edge off.
"There," T'ixixi said in a satisfied voice once she'd unclasped my bra and let it fall down my back, catching it in her hooves. "Dang. Those kinda look big enough already."
Having my tits hanging out underneath my shirt... it felt nice. Brushing against the soft fabric made my nipples perk up a little bit. And the compliment felt nice too.
"You've got a really big, beautiful butt," I said, rapidly relaxing the barrier between what I was thinking and what I was capable of saying. "It looks really sexy."
T'ixixi smiled back at me.
"Thanks," she said. "Can I give you a taste of Zecora's 'special sauce' now?"
I nodded. Regardless of what the effect was, or how the salve needed to applied, I was bought in for the rest of the evening now. I wanted to see what this room full of sexy zebra had to offer.
T'ixixi opened up the small jar Zecora had given her and scooped a little bit of the ointment inside onto her hoof. It was a sort of translucent white, the same an allergy or cold relief cream might be. And, just the same as a chest-cold, T'ixixi rubbed the salve onto my breasts, making sure to cover them from top to bottom, holding them up off my chest for the bit underneath, swirling around so every inch of sensitive skin was coated, and my nipples too, which were by now pointy and excited and made me jump and let out a little 'eep!' when she touched them. And when she touched them again. And again. Eep.
"There," she said once my boobs were evidently lubed up enough with Zecora's stuff. "Now we just wait a few seconds, and..."
Golly. How do I go about telling you what it felt like?
The best part was just looking. I don't know what magic's supposed to feel like, when it helps you grow, make something bigger or smaller... but just watching, staring down at my own tits, seeing them get bigger, and bigger, and bigger, in front of my own eyes... it was like breaking apart every image stored in my head of staring at myself in front of a mirror since puberty. The double-Ds I was used to had always felt like a lot, but now I was beginning to understand why even bigger chested girls both seemed to enjoy and despise the extra attention they got. My boobs felt big enough to knock over a skyscraper.
T'ixixi and Din'de both couldn't stop smiling at me. I highly doubt they'd seen a naked human before, let alone one with big honkin' sweater puppies.
Din'de couldn't even keep his hooves to himself. He reached out and gave my titties a big ol' poke, and smiled like a colt in a candy store as he watched them bounce.
"Hey!" I said. Not that his hoof on my tits didn't feel nice. Just that... if you're gonna tease, at least follow through.
The atmosphere in the room was hard to describe. Like the moment in a porno movie right before everyone just rips their clothes off and fucks each others' brains out?
Well, I guess it was technically that, anyway.
"So this is why you guys are so big and bodacious?" I asked. I couldn't help but stare at the jar of cream, wondering how such an interesting concoction could be held in such a small container.
Din'de and T'ixixi shared a look, smirking.
"No," Din'de said, "this is more or less our 'natural'. But—"
"That doesn't mean you can't have a lot of fun making something big even bigger," T'ixixi said. She jiggled her hips from side to side, shaking her big, bootyful buttcheeks for effect.
The next minute or so is kind of a blur, in the way that transitions from being fully clothed to sex usually are. Your clothes get thrown somewhere, you start drooling and staring at somepony's rapidly hardening prick... I'm sure you've all been there before.
What's important is that pretty instantly thereafter, I was naked, and that made me fit in with everypony else, unless T'ixixi really had been—
"Aha! I knew it!" I stared and pointed as I caught her sliding off that almost imperceptible, paper-thin thong. Her butt still looked amazing without it, but there was the lack of highlight emphasis.
T'ixixi just smiled at me.
Then everypony took a bit of the salve, and things started to get crazy.
It's hard enough to describe how big and bouncy T'ixixi's booty was, just wobbling there in front of me. Watching it get even bigger was like finding out your parents had hidden an entire tree's worth of presents from you the night before Christmas. And there was Din'de, whose cock looked like it was enough to stretch me out into sore-walking territory for weeks. Now that was even bigger, and I found myself wondering how hard it was possible to cum when every inch of your cunt was full of with zebra cock.
"Come here," I said to Din'de, licking my lips. Waiting is no fun when there's a prize right in front of your eyes.
Din'de was happy to comply. He kept smiling as he walked over, let me reach underneath his stomach and feel his big, half-hard shaft, cup his low-hanging balls in my hand and give them a nice squeeze, which made his hulking zebra cock twitch, so big it made a little 'slap' sound against his belly.
Without words, the two of us found our way to the floor. Din'de lay down on his back, and I got to kneel in front of him, slavering over this giant hunk of dick-meat and what I wanted to do with it.
Maybe just because I was still getting used to the extra heft of my big hanging titties, a devilish idea popped into my head.
"You know," I said, running a hand languidly up the base of Din'de's cock, rapidly hardening and twitching against my touch. "It occurs to me that probably nopony's ever gotten a proper titfuck before. On account of," I cupped my hands underneath my tits and bounced them accordingly, "nopony really has tits to fuck."
Din'de was staring wordless at me. It reminded me of a nervous foal in school, waiting for the teacher's instruction. It made me smirk, like a little minx.
"Want me to wrap these big melons around your prick and milk you until your balls are dry?"
He was all words before. Now Din'de looked like he could barely manage a nod.
"Yes," he said, half-grunting it. His hooves were at the base of his cock, holding it steady, and the sheen of the salve glowing along the shaft made it look even juicier and more delicious. Between wondering if the whole thing would even fit in my pussy, it seemed like a good idea to at least give it the tit-test. Whether my double-d's would have done the job before salve was anypony's guess. But there definitely wouldn't be any problem right now.
"Ohh, buck," Din'de moaned as I slid the head of his cock through the tight tunnel made in the center of my tits. His head bulged and strained profanely against my boobs, and by the time I'd gotten them wrapped all the way around, he was groaning under his breath and bucking his hips up every other second to jam the head of his big prick against the underside of my chin, and just get the shaft as lubed up and slippery as he could, squeezing between my two big jugs.
I smiled as I wrapped my arm around to squeeze my titties even tighter. Kept smiling, one arm around to hold his cock in place, as I started moving my chest up and down, sliding slowly and deliciously over Din'de's big, hulking prick.
I'd just started to get into a rhythm when Din'de's posture changed. His face scrunched, his eyes darted nervously, and his hips moved even more out of control.
"Mhmm," I said, extending my tongue and giving the head of his prick a cute little lick. "I take it that means you like my big—"
His cock shot me in the face with a torrent of cum before I could finish my sentence. It felt like catching a close-up spurt from a giant supersoaker, and the second stream was just as fierce, kind of just spraying my face with sticky zebra cum like cake frosting, until almost my entire face was coated in it, dripping down my chin onto my chest, where it collected like a little reservoir in the space inbetween my titties as they were held together. A bit more dribbled down and began to drip down Din'de's cockshaft, a big pool of cum dripping everywhere.
I felt like a comical cough would have been in place, but I hadn't choked on any of his load. Just gotten a very impromptu facial cleanse. I wiped a handful of the cum off my cheek, almost enough to collect in my cupped hand, and tasted it playfully with my extended tongue.
"Mmm," I said. "Musky."
Din'de seemed like he'd been conked on the head with a hammer. His verbal reasoning centers were decidedly short-circuited.
"B'duh," he said. "Uh... huh."
T'ixixi giggled mercilessly at him.
"Don't mind big boy over here... he's always a quick shot for the first few rounds."
"Mm," I said again, licking a line of cum off my finger. "No complaints here. I like getting all sticky."
Though he'd just fired off a load big enough to drown a small forest creature, Din'de's cock twitched inbetween my tits, making them jiggle slightly, and me giggle less slightly.
"You're not gonna make her do all the work, are you?" T'ixixi asked. She seemed eager to get started playing herself, but also to be aware of the fact that with a big set of tits and an even bigger cock, there might be nothing else I'd rather do with my evening than keep on milking until there was none left to milk.
Din'de rolled his eyes and sighed.
"No," he said. "I just... I'm just catching my breath. That's all."
T'ixixi laughed.
"Okay, hot-shot. Well, when you're done, you think you can manage to rut this poor horny girl, before she gets bored of your big zebra prick?"
"That's not gonna happen any time soon," I interjected, wiping off the last of my sticky 'face mask'. Just looking at Din'de's swollen zebra cock made my cunt tingle in an eager and desperate way.
T'ixixi and Din'de shared a laugh.
"Well," Din'de said, standing up and maneuvering his absurdly huge prick with a modicum of grace, "have you ever taken a cock this big before?"
I shook my head, looking more innocent than might have otherwise been possible while naked, tits out, and covered in zebra cum.
Din'de didn't say anything else. He just held his cock and waited, smiling, as I put two-and-two together and spread myself out on the ground of Zecora's hut. I wanted to just put my legs up behind my head and stare at that zebra dick, but not paying attention to my own titties was tricky. They were big, and bouncy, and tweaking my nipples felt even better than usual. Mmm.
Din'de didn't need me to help navigate though. His prick was huge, engorged, swollen and veiny and ready to shove inside some poor human girl's cunt for the ride of her life. He gave it a few strokes up and down on either side, showing off the hardness and sending a tingle up and down my spine while I was waiting. Then he maneuvered the tip downward, and pressed it against my pussy, and right away I can tell you I've never felt anything that big ready to shove right inside me, but that's just what he started to do...
"Oh," I said, after not even an inch had slid inside. "That's... really big."
"Do you need me to slow down?"
I shook my head. Cupped my tits together and held them out for Din'de to stare at. Pinched one of my nipples, and groaned under my breath.
"No," I said. "That's okay. Just... just give it to me. Please."
T'ixixi tapped me on the shoulder, and I turned my head, though it was hard to take my eyes off the imminent and proverbial prize of Din'de's dick.
"Don't forget to breathe, hun," she said in a reassuring voice. "After the first few inches, the rest is a breeze."
"I want you to sit your big fat zebra butt on my face," I blurted out. Maybe one too many glasses of orange-stuff deep. But if you get a chance for a zebra booty face-squash, wouldn't you take it?
T'ixixi giggled and shook her butt at me.
"Oh? You want lil' ol me to park my big ol' zebra booty on your face? Is that it?"
"Yes," I said, gasping it as Din'de shoved another half-inch inside. "Ahh!"
"Well," T'ixixi, "since you asked so nicely..."
She stood in place above my head. Staring at anything other than her butt was suddenly impossible. Like being squished by two moons falling from the sky.
"Maybe just a little extra," she said. She grabbed a small bit of salve and rubbed it onto her butt, already shiny and big and bouncy from her previous dose. To my surprise, she reached down and gave my butt a playful squeeze, and I could feel the warming-cool of the salve as it evaporated off my skin. That, and the soft swelling feeling that came as my butt started to grow bigger...
"Oh," I said. It wasn't much, but all I could manage being overwhelmed at the moment. Din'de's cock felt like it was halfway in, but when I looked down, I'd just barely managed to take the bulky head of his prick inside. And T'ixixi gave me one last smirk before she got into place, holding her colossal backside over my head and jiggling her cheeks back and forth before slowly lowering towards my face. I don't know that I can correctly translate the experience or urge to be smothered by a zebra booty-queen's gigantic tush. Speaking of remembering to breathe... well, there was enough room for that. Between her cheeks, I could just barely reach her little rosebud with my tongue, but that would have required focus, and effort, and most of that was out the window after Din'de gave in and started to shove his cock all the way inside me.
"Oh shit," I said out loud. "There's no way that giant thing is gonna fit inside my cunt."
"Where there's a will, there's a way," T'ixixi said, wiggling her buns on my face. My own butt was almost finished swelling, making a much better cushioning on the ground as Din'de got ready for properly pounding me.
The three of us became singularly focused then, watching Din'de groan and grit his teeth as he shoved himself in my pussy, slowly, arduously, pushing out every inch until I was so full I was sure I couldn't take any more, and still, there was more, and Din'de was no quitter, he kept grunting and shoving until finally, with the three of us all sized up, he'd managed to fit about the entire length of his limb-sized appendage in my pretty human pussy.
Tools for description left me as I stared at Din'de's big, fat horsecock, pushing up against my stomach and filling every inch of my pussy, including inches I was just finding out I had. I couldn't help it, and reached down to give my own butt a squeeze. It felt soft, squishy, but not nearly as gigantic as T'ixixi's.
It didn't occur to me until later in the evening, when things were finally winding down, that Zecora had been standing on the sidelines almost the entire time, observing the goings on without saying so much as an end-rhyme.
T'ixixi explained it to me later, when we'd taken up an exchange and were trading letters a few times a week. Simply put: 'Zecora likes to watch'.
So do I, as it turns out. When you're being zebra-fucked by a cock the size of a small pony, it becomes difficult to remember you're even in control of your own body. One inch of a giant cock getting shoved into your pussy and you can't help but stare. Watch the glistening shaft slide in and out, feel your whole body shudder as you go from feeling 'full' to 'empty' and then back again. It was a lot; playing with my own, swollen titties, getting dose after dose of T'ixixi's big, bulging butt in my face. Din'de grunting and groaning and quite obviously trying to keep himself from cumming before anypony else was finished. Poor guy.
Well, it wasn't much longer he had to wait. I could feel myself ready to cum the second his head was inside me, and I'd been riding at the edge of my orgasm as long as possible, teasing it out and seeing how big the explosion might be if I timed it simultaneously with another load of zebra spunk.
You could tell by the urgency of his thrusts, the little panic in his eyes, that he was about to shoot. Possibly a human pussy was just as sexy and exotic to a zebra as a zebra cock was to a human. Very possibly.
T'ixixi noticed it too. She moved until her butt was just slightly above my face, so her pussy was lined up with my mouth, and my tongue started going to town instantly, not needing any instruction or signal to see if we could all chain our climaxes together.
Din'de was the one not doing anything other than fucking, so he was the one who got to make the announcement.
"Buck," he said, his voice gruff and unsteady. "I think I'm gonna—"
T'ixixi kissed him, hard. None of us could speak properly, all dangling off the edge of the same cliff.
The moment I felt his cock twitch and surge and begin to unload cum like a firehose in my pussy, I started cumming. My tongue went wild, and I could feel T'ixixi cumming too, her butt bounced and jiggled and her cheeks clapped together, but her pussy winked and dripped all over my mouth, and my moans were muffled into the folds of her cunt, and Din'de kept thrusting through the whole thing, his groans caught up in T'ixixi's french-kiss, his cock pulsing and throbbing and shooting rope after rope of hot sticky cum into my pussy. He pulled out halfway through, and the thick torrent of creamy jizz continued to spray onto my stomach, tits, and the lower half of T'ixixi's bouncing butt. I didn't count the shots, just to know that I was full, and leaking zebra cum, and covered in it too, and had just finished cumming my brains out at the same time as a room of sized-up sex-friends... and, yes, Zecora was still there, watching, though I didn't really notice her at the time.
It took a while for anypony to say something. Catching their breath, and such.
When someone did speak, it was all of us at once, minus Zecora, who preferred smiling silently from the sidelines.
"Wow," was the word that came out.
Another moment, tense with waiting.
Then the three of us, simultaneously:
"Wanna do it again?"
