Record Deal

by Paper_Pen

Rating: everyone
Tags: Original Character, Comedy, Random, Slice of Life, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic
Length: 1664

Rock Note gets a record deal... for a couple of minutes, at least.

Rock Note gets a record deal... until Paper Pen opens his mouth, of course.

Published 2020-06-10 07:20:01 UTC
Last updated 2020-06-10 07:20:01 UTC

Record Deal

"Cause you're about to miss everything!" Rock Note belted out the final lyrics to a song as he shredded his guitar, "Cause you're about to miss everything!" The pegasus dexterously flew his hooves across the instrument's strings as he sung, his hooves providing a precision typically reserved for the likes of creatures with fingers or claws. Finally, after what had been a successful and physically taxing night at the cafe's open mic, Note closed out his final song of the evening.

The audience, as they had for every one of the pony's other performances, applauded loudly. Note was good, not just good for the scene at a local open mic but he could genuinely work the strings of his guitar as if the instrument was an extension of himself. His voice was similarly golden, an instrument in it of itself wielded masterfully in a thousand screaming cadences.

"Thank you, seriously, it's been a blast! And uh, if anypony knows a drummer, or literally anypony who can play an instrument, please let me know!" A smile couldn't help but work itself onto the exhausted musician's face as he stood up, gave a parting wave to his audience, and trotted off stage to join his friends, Canvas Brush and Paper Pen, on the cafe's sofa.

"You were great, babe!" Canvas Complimented, giving her stallionfriend a peck on the cheek as he sat down next to her.

"Aww, thank you hun!" The pegasus returned his marefriend's affection, "Yo, Pen, you have booze on you right?"

"It's two o' clock on a Tuesday, Note, of course I have booze on me!" His unicorn friend assured, taking a small bottle of vodka from inside his scarf and handing it to the pegasus. Note emptied the bottle into his coffee and chugged the drink, a refreshing drunkenness allowing him to relax.

"Should you really be drinking this early?" Canvas asked with a concerned look.

"What are you, my mom? It's fiiine!" Note rolled his eyes, playfully teasing her.

"Nah, if she was your mom she'd be ten times hotter!" Pen joked. Nopony else laughed and the unicorn slammed back his own spiked cup of coffee, "But uh... yeah, dude, you were great up there!"

"You're too nice! But seriously, I was pretty awesome." Note smiled, not even attempting to act humble, "I just wish I could record some of this, y'know? Finally start selling some tapes instead of riding off of live performances."

"My friend Lilac has a tape recorder, you know!" Canvas optioned, "She uses it to record poetry, the sound quality is really nice."

"Eh, those are fine for vocals, but you need the studio stuff to get the guitar sounding good."

Suddenly a blue unicorn in a sharp white suit sat across from the trio, laying his hooves on the coffee table and extending his hoof, which contained a cream-white business card to Note.

"The name's Frostbite," The sudden stranger introduced himself, "I've been in the business for longer than Princess Twilight's had wings, you need a studio, I'm your guy!"

"Sounds great, but if it costs money I don't have any." Note said, regretfully.

"...a record deal, I'm offering you a record deal. I pay you." Frostbite clarified, sliding a contract in front of Note, "All you gotta do is sign here and-"

"Yo, Pen, help me out here?" Note interrupted, calling to his friend, "Sorry 'bout cutting you off freezer burn, he's my…?" Note looked to Pen, expecting him to finish the lie with whatever title would work best.

"Agent, I'm his agent." Pen lied.

Immediately the contract was enveloped in an aura of grey magic and levitated to Pen. The unicorn closely examined the document, making note of every carefully worded fine print to ensure that his friend wouldn't get bucked out of any bits. The contract seemed sound enough, Fueled By Oats LLC would allow Note to record in their Manehattan studio, then they'd sell tapes and he'd get a ten percent cut of the profits. It wasn't great, of course, but negotiations hadn't started yet.

"I'm sorry," Frostbite looked to Pen, confused, "He's doing open mics in coffee shops and he has an agent?"

"Are you deaf or just stupid?" Pen asked, looking at the businesspony like he was an idiot, "He gets a twenty five percent cut or we walk!"

"Twenty five?!" Frostbite scoffed, "Maybe I'd be willing to go to twelve, maybe! But no higher!"

"How about twenty and I don't kick your flank!" Pen raised his voice.

"Thirteen!" Frostbite raised his offer, similarly raising the severity of his tone with Pen, "Thirteen percent, final offer!"

"Thirteen?! Thirteen?!" Pen looked to the stallion with fire in his eyes, "Do you kiss your mother with that mouth? Do you? I wouldn't even kiss your disgusting bugbear of a mother with that mouth! Fifteen percent or so help me Celestia I'll shove this contract so far up your-"

"Fine, fifteen percent!" Frostbite nervously wiped his brow and sat down.

"Great, glad we were able to come to an agreement!" Pen said cheerily, levitating the contract back over to his friend, "You record music, they sell it, you get a cut, easy deal."

"Thank you, dude!" Note seemed pleased with the deal, "So, Freezer Burn-"

"Frostbite… My name is Frostbite." The business stallion corrected.

"Yeah, that's what I said. So, how soon are we doing this?" Note asked.

"Well, it's been a busy quarter but I can work with you, when are you free?" Frostbite offered.

"Like, whenever, literally, I don't have-"

"My client is a very busy stallion, if you couldn't tell!" Pen interjected, the alcohol settling into his system and allowing him to better settle into his role, "Seriously, are you stupid? Because you seem like a real bucking idiot. Whenever he says, you work, got that?"

"For a stallion in a scarf you really think you're tough, don't you?" Frostbite sneered at Pen, "Forget it, I thought the talented pony was supposed to be the difficult one, but I'd rather sign Tirek than have to deal with you!"

Frostbite got up and left in a huff, stomping from the cafe in frustration with a curse on his breath. Note didn't say anything, his only reaction was to stare into his coffee, but he didn't need to guilt Pen, Canvas could do that just fine on her own.

"Seriously?" Canvas cocked her eyebrow and looked down her snout at Pen, "You realize how sucky that was, right?"

"Yeah…" Pen said softly, realizing how badly he'd bucked up.

"He was going to give Note exactly what he wanted and you ruined it. You're acting like a real jerk!"

"Holy bits, Canvas, I got that already!" Pen held his head in his hooves, distraught.

"I don't care, you really bucked up here and you deserve to get called out on it!" Canvas kept on, "Every time you're drunk you do this, you just can't keep your mouth shut!"

"He's probably not far-" Pen got up from his seat, trotting out of the coffee shop.

It wasn't an easy task to find a well dressed jerkwad in a city full of them, but nevertheless Pen raced down the street looking for Frostbite. Finally he saw the blue unicorn trotting down the street, still justifiably upset from the looks of it.

"Hey, Frostbite!" Pen approached.

"By Celestia-, what do you want?!" He looked at Pen with disdain. He deserved it, of course, even if something in the back of his drunken head wanted to call Frostbite a jerkwad or hit on the stallion's mom.

"Just listen, please-" Pen began with a sigh, "Look, I get I was a total tool back in the cafe-"

"A tool? Tools are useful, you just suck!" Frostbite retorted. That one hurt, Pen could appreciate the wit, but it still stung.

"Yeah, I suck, I get it, but Note is a really great guy and he doesn't deserve to lose this because of me." Pen explained.

"He is talented… I like his style but if I have to deal with you as his agent, it's still a no!"

"So uh, about that agent thing…" Pen gave a nervous chuckle, "I'm not his agent, he doesn't even have an agent, I just wanted to make sure you didn't buck him out of any money."

"So you're not even an agent, and you managed to negotiate his share to fifteen percent?!" Frostbite looked to Pen, shocked.

"And to top it all off, I'm drunk! It's amazing, really." Pen bragged, "Anyways, how about I give you fifty bits, neither of us talk to each other ever again, and Note gets a record deal?"

Frostbite brought his hoof to his chin, considering the offer for a moment.

"A hundred bits." Frostbite raised, "You were really sucky!"

"A hundred bits?!" Pen scoffed, "Buddy, I've been living off ramen for years, fifty is steep for me! Seventy five, final offer."

"Eighty." Frostbite offered.

"Come on, that's only like five bits more, you did that just to spite me!" Pen accused.

"You called my mom a bugbear!"

"Fine, fine…" Pen relented, begrudgingly pulling a coin-purse from his scarf, pouring eighty bits into his hoof and giving them to the stallion.

"Great, glad we were able to come to an agreement!" Frostbite mocked Pen, taking the bits.

"We agree not to talk… Jerkwad." Pen poorly covered that lost jab with a fake cough.

Frostbite rolled his eyes, but nevertheless turned back toward the coffee shop and trotted in. Pen watched from afar as he approached Note and struck up a conversation. There, things had been mended, now Pen could forget about the panging guilt eating away at his heart, and if he couldn't? Well, that's what vodka was for!

Author's Note

Heya! Hope y'all liked this, it isn't my best work but quarantine hit me hard mentally and I couldn't get much out, so it's nice to finally have something to post again!