Chapters Equestria Girls Random Moments 2
One afternoon the Rainbooms went to the nall to hang out, take selfies and have tons of fun without worrying about school. By chance Pinkie spots her older sister, Maud Pie, from a distance and decides to call her so she can join them. However, upon arrival Maud shows a black eye.
"My God, Maud! What happened to you!?"
"It's nothing Rarity. I just have my left eye swollen." Maud says in her monotonous tone.
"Swollen ? Someone hit you in the eye! Your eye !" Rainbow Dash exclaims without believing that someone has assaulted Maud Pie from all the people she knows.
"My poor little big sister was savagely attacked! But fear not Maud, I'll find and lay the smackdown to whoever did this to you. Then, I'll take this cupcake and stick it right into the-"
"Actually Pinkie, I caused this myself." Maud says making the girls gasp at the shock by the revelation.
It was a fact Maud Pie is a calm person by nature and that she never did anything wrong in her life to other people. Thus, she begins to narrate the facts.
"You see, I came to pick up Boulder from his beauty session as I was heading home. Arriving at the bus stop I didn't realize that I took the position of a girl who uses her hands to make herself understood, which caused the lawsuit. It's not necessary to tell the aftermath, since you already know it. "
Twilight Sparkle adjusts her glasses, getting an idea of who that person was. "I see. So that girl was deaf-mute."
"No. She was a boxer." Maud corrects her.
Inside the Army headquarters the soldiers were practicing their marksmanship incessantly as scheduled. When it was Applejack's turn, she started shooting with herweapon at point-blank range in all directions. However, no bullet hit its target, much less the targets of her companions.
Obviously her superior noticed the tremendous failure for which he decides to reprimand the blonde girl.
"What the hell is going on with you, Apple!? You haven't made at any target!"
"Well my commander, it's not that bad. We have to thank we are in training camp and not in a real fight." Applejack defends herself by rubbing the nape of the neck.
"You say this now. But suppose a war breaks out and you are called to serve. You are sent to a sad and smelly trench with nothing but your weapon and ammunition against a hundred of enemy troops.
Suddenly one of them approaches your post and just having him two meters away, two meters nothing else, you fail as you did now. What would you do?"
Applejack starts to think before giving her honest answer. "Um ... well I think nothing, my commander."
"What do you mean nothing ?!" The annoyed high-ranking military asks.
"Sure! I very much doubt the enemy has as bad aim as I do." Applejack says, giggling nervously.
Sugarcoat and her boyfriend went for a walk in the park. Far from having a romantic day, the pigtailed girl spent her time doing sums, divisions and percentages with the calculator on her cell phone; which annoyed her companion.
"Sugarcoat, could you put that thing down for a moment and do something else?"
"Hold on, I'm almost done." Sugarcoat responds without taking her eyes off the mobile device.
"The one who is going to done is me! Don't you realize that this is affecting our relationship?" The boy exclaims desperately.
"Yes. Approximately 79.5%." The girl in glasses responds by showing him the calculations with her cell phone in hand.
Carrousel Boutique is on fire!
Apparently a short circuit inside Rarity's clothing store caused the fire, alarming the city. Luckily, the group of firefighters went directly to the scene to extinguish the incident.
However, far from doing their job, the firefighters were sitting in the armchairs of the establishment at Rarity's request. Then the fashionista girl leaves her room covering her cell phone with one hand.
"Could you wait a little while more, please? I am with a client ...!" Rarity pleads because she was about to close a million dollar deal with said person, despite the fact that the room was covered with smoke.
A distraught Rainbow Dash was walking down the street kicking empty cans on her way. She hadn't eaten in weeks and her stomach was torturing her, wanting to digest something. The point was, she had no money to pay even a can of food.
" Dang it! If I don't eat something, I'm sure to starve in the next few hours!" Rainbow exclaims desperately inside her mind.
Suddenly she sees a sort of greenish paper being carried by the wind. She quickly picks it up, finding herself surprised that it's money.
"But it is a $ 100 bill!" Rainbow Dash screams with joy because she was finally going to buy some food with that money. Although something invades her.
"What if it turns out to be false?" She wonders uncertainly. "How could I know?"
Then a well-dressed man comes walking in her direction, so Rainbow Dash decides to ask him for help.
"Hey buddy! Sorry to interrupt you, but I need to ask you a consultation."
"Sure, young lady! What is it about?"
Rainbow puts the money she had found moments ago in the hands of the passerby. "Please can you tell me if this bill true or not?"
The man carefully examines the bill, exposes it to the light, and rubs it several times with his thumbs. Then he gives his verdict.
"Indeed, the bill is genuine."
The athlete jumps of joy at the man's prompt response and gives him a handshake. "Thank you very much, mister! Now I can eat something!"
"Glad to hear that, miss. Bon appetit! " The man expresses his best wishes to Rainbow Dash before leaving. However, the athlete realizes that the guy kept the 100 dollar bill in his coat, which bothers her tremendously.
"Hey! Where do you think you are going with my money!?" Rainbow claims who went after the man.
"Excuse me. Your money?"
"That's right, scoundrel! I found that money on the street! I'd only asked for consultation, and you're taking it away!"
"Look miss!" The passerby gets serious about Rainbow Dash's claims, " I am a doctor, and I charge a hundred dollars for consultations! Now that you know ... see you later!"
That said, the doctor walks away with the money bill inside his belongings leaving a Rainbow Dash totally out of place.
Big Mactintosh was in the living room carrying a ladder, hammer, and nails to hang a nice portrait of the Apple family. Positioning the nail in the right place to hold the portrait, Big Mac begins hammering about three times.
Unaware to him, a group of city workers was in the process of demolishing an abandoned house and only had a section of the property to be demolished until, for unknown reasons, the rope attached to the wrecking ball breaks.
Just as Big Mac was about to make the last hammer blow, the wrecking ball shoots out toward the Apple's home just like cannonball. As a result, the steel sphere not only destroyed the room, but took a portion of the family's house.
Fortunately, the oldest of the Apple brothers emerges from the rubble alive (although he now had several bruises, open wounds, and lost a few teeth).
"... Eeup ... I must control my strength ..." Big Mac said to himself.
Author's Note
Poor Big Mac. If only he could know.
Equestria Girls Random Moments 2
Class time at Canterlot High School. Cranky Doodle calls Scootaloo to the front for an exercise, much to the bad luck of the girl who wished internally that it be an easy question.
"Well Scootaloo, I'll give you an example!" Cranky begins to explain. "I'm walking on the outskirts of a farm, then I see a man ruthlessly hitting a donkey so I decide to intervene in defense of the poor animal. Wich sentiment would I be obeying?"
"To a brotherly sentiment, Mr. Doodle!" Scootaloo responds, causing the students to burst out laughing.
Trixie Lunamoon was heading home after practicing with her band. It was a good sunny day with the sky clear and the birds singing. It was hardly going to rain today.
But as if has been caused by magic, the sky clouded over and gray clouds began to appear giving way to the raindrops. People quickly return to their homes or businesses to avoid getting soaked and catching a cold.
Everyone except Trixie who was still outside with nothing but the hood of her jacket to cover herself from the rain.
"Damn you, Global Warming! I still have ten blocks to go home!"
The aspirant to mage needed a way to get to her destination faster. Coincidentally she comes across a lady, who apparently came prepared for this kind of situation, carrying a cart where her baby was asleep.
This gave Trixie an idea.
"Excuse me ma'am! I propose you a deal!" The teenager approaches the woman whispering something in her ear.
Minutes later, the lady was carrying Trixie inside the cart in addition to her baby. What bothered the woman the most was the great power of conviction that Trixie possessed and how she was persuaded to do this madness.
It was night in the neighborhood.
Winona, the Apple family's dog, began to howl in obedience to her nature inherited by her wild ancestors. However, no one who is resting at this time wants to be bothered by such noise, especially Granny Smith who comes out to scold the animal.
"Shut up Winona, you don't let anyone sleep with your noise!" The old woman growls. Then she gives her a threatening expression. "Listen to me: If I hear you howling again, even a little bit... I'm going to beat you up! Did you understand!?"
The dog nods her head several times, fearful of her owner's warning, and remained silent. After midnight Winona listens seberal footsteps in the distance. Looking up she sees a thief who entered the barn carrying a sack on his shoulders.
Winona wastes no time and enters the main house through the window, searching for Granny Smith's room. Once found, she starts waking the elderly woman up by gently tapping fer using the front paws.
"... Huh? ... What do you want now Winona?" Granny Smith asks heavily.
The canid takes a small blackboard and writes: WOOF! WOOF!
In the hospital room, Nurse Redheart is carrying a person who was seriously ill on a stretcher in order to save his life. Sadly, the body of the individual could not bear any more and dies in the process.
Redhead takes the patient's body on the same stretcher when he entered the operating room, now completely covered by a white sheet. One of the passing doctors looks at Redheart and the body, curious to know the cause of death.
"Bang Bang ?" The doctor asks her, imitating with his hand a pistol shooting bullets.
"No doctor, Glup Glup !" Nurse Redheart responds by imitating someone who drink a glass of water.
A girl with dark green hair and a country hat with doctor's clothes was walking through the corridors looking for her colleague's office. After a couple of laps, the young doctor finally locates the office where it sais: TWILIGHT SPARKLE. OWNER OF THIS TINY HOSPITAL.
After knocking on the door Twilight gives her pass to enter, leaving aside her notes about surgical procedures. The girl shakes her hand enthusiastically, not waiting for the moment to start working for her - I mean - with her.
"Nice to meet you at last! I've heard a lot about you and I must say I'm a great admirer of yours!"
Then, the girl with hat spits a disgusting amount of salivary mucus on Twilight's shoulder. "Sweet Leaf, professional spitter, at your service!"
Once Sweet Leaf has been introduced, Twilight returns the salute by spitting her own amount of salivary mucus directly into the green haired girl's eye.
"Nice to meet you. Twilight Sparkle, just an amateur spitter."
The most feared mob boss in town, Pinkie Pie, is getting ready to go out with her people to a meeting. Choosing whether to carry between her machine gun or a couple of pistols, the pink-haired girl opts for a mallet that had the image of a harlequin painted on one of the surfaces.
"Boss, your new bodyguard is here!" One of her subordinates calls her.
"Show him in!" Pinkie says.
Entering the room appears a man of approximately fifty years old but with a robust bearing. Despite his fierce appearance, he had the face of good people. Pinkie Pie decides to hit the man's abdomen, feeling she had just hit a wall.
"Not bad, not bad!" Pinkie says in surprise.
"Nobody will dare to mess up with while I'm by your side, boss." Says the big man.
"There is no doubt about it! So, tell me my friend, what did you do before?"
"I used to be a boxer, boss." The newly appointed bodyguard replies. "As there was no one like me until the end of my career. If you want, I can show you my wounds: I've got my nose operated after it was broken in a match, my ears ended like Brussels sprouts. The scars marked my face, and look at the teeth ... I have them all destroyed!"
"Okay! You'd already convinced me!" Pinkie Pie says pulling out a wad of bills before placing them on her bodyguard's hand. "Here. I give you an advance of three thousand dollars if you give me the address of the guy who left you in that state."
Fluttershy was not doing well.
Anyone who saw her would say that the teenager was having a bad time. She was walking down the street with her head down and her gaze lost. She stops in front of a Mini-market, looking through the showcase at various fresh and appetizing products. Unfortunately, the shy girl has nothing to pay with for any of them.
A dark thought crosses her mind. Fluttershy refuses to conceive of such an idea, but the need is too much for her.
"Oh well… if there is no other choice."
The girl enters the commercial establishment. Seconds later she leaves the place fleeing with a strip of cold cuts and cheese in her arms. The owner of the place starts screaming.
"HELP! I HAVE BEEN STOLEN! STOP HER!"
To add Fluttershy's bad luck a policewoman witnessed the assault and went after her, apprehending Fluttershy a few blocks below and taking her prisoner. Later that day, Fluttershy took pity on the judge.
"... And for having stolen a pound of sausage plus a pound of cheese, I sentence you to spend ninety days in prison!"
Dictated her sentence, Fluttershy breaks into tears. "Please Your Honor, have mercy on me! I'm so poor that I don't have a home!"
"Sorry young lady, but the law applies to the rich and the poor alike."
"B-but you say I must spend 90 days in prison!..." Fluttershy exclaims, "... and where am I supposed to spend the nights?"
Author's Note
Fear not, fellas. Fluttershy will be alright. Promise!
Equestria Girls Random Moments 2
"Gloriosa, I'm here!" Timber Sprunce says after a day of classes at College. He goes to the kitchen believing her older sister is there but was not. He searches the living room and the bureau without success.
Timber thought Gloriosa Daisy went for shopping when a faint voice calls to him from the room. "…T-Timbeeeerrr…."
"Gloriosa?" The young man enters the bedroom finding a Gloriosa in poor health, wrapped in layers of sheets. "Oh my god! Gloriosa, are you alright?!"
"… .. I-I d-don't feel good…." The woman responds in her subdued tone. “P-please… call a doctor….”
"Right away!"
Timber takes the cell phone out of his backpack and starts looking for the number of the doctor who always attends them. After thirty minutes, the doctor enters the bedroom with her equipment in hand.
"Okay Gloriosa, let's see what's happening. Do you have a fever?"
"... I-I'm an living o-oven, doctor..."
"Do you sweat?"
"... like a pig, doctor ..."
"Shaking chills?"
"Quite... m-my body t-trembles as you don't-have idea..."
"I understand. Do your teeth chatter?"
Gloriosa stops for a moment to think. "I'm not s-sure, doctor. My d-dentures are i-in the bathroom and from here I can't hear them ..."
Middle Ages
Sir Flash Sentry leaves his meeting of the Knights of the Wonderbolts Order and was preparing to go home, not before taking first a sip of his favorite drink at the Apple Tavern. Unlike other days where Flash tends to drink to his liking, today he was sulky and listless.
"I see you troubled, Sir. Did your mission at Garble's Castle leave you without energy to enjoy my brew?" Asks the owner of the place, Applejack.
"It's not that, gentle innkeeper. I have a strong discomfort that affects my entire body and does not leave me alone," explains Flash. "I went to all kinds of health teachers, witches, sorcerers and even with this new group of 'gypsies', and none of them could solve my ailments!"
At the knight's exclamation, Applejack can't help but chuckle. "Forgive me for what I'm going to say, but you've wasted your time in nonsense! You should have came to Clover the Clever from the begining."
"Clover the Clever?" The blue-haired knight asks curiously. "And who is she? Is it one of those sages from Saddle Arabia?"
"None of that, Sir!" Applejack begins to narrate about this character. "Clover the Clever came from the Northern Lands and dedicated to eradicate all kinds of evils by making gestures.
Note that once the Kingdom's Army was exterminated by the Hordes of Tambelon after a battle, then Clover the Clever came and with a gesture she'd disappeared the invaders. On another occasion, a plague struck the region until Clover the Magnificent came and with a gesture of hers the plague disappeared. And how to forget when a ferocious dragon was taking our herds, because Clover the Clever appeared and making a gesture the beast disappeared!"
Hearing the great feats of the aforementioned Clover, Sir Flash Sentry rises from his seat finding the solution to his dilemma.
"It's settled then! I'll ride my horse and go find this Clover maiden so she can heal me right now!"
However, the blonde innkeeper scratches the back of her head making a dubious grimace. "Eh ... that's no longer be possible."
"And why not?"
"Because she became so famous that the king made a gesture , and Clover the Clever disappeared !"
Trouble Shoes read the job ads in the day's newspaper, needing to pay some outstanding receipts and the fact there was almost no food in the pantry. After going through ads by ads, he finally finds one that might be for him.
"People are needed to do jobs in the city. I'll go right now!"
Minutes later, he appears before Mayor Mare with his curriculum.
"Alright, everything seems to be in agreement. You are hired, Mr. Clyde!" Says the mayor. "You will start tomorrow by putting up lamp posts."
This new job sounded far-fetched unlike his old job as an ice cream maker, but he knows the money is neccesary to cover his payments.
(The next day)
Poor Trouble Shoes struggled to stay steady by carrying the top of the heavy pole. Fortunately, he was assigned a co-worker - a strong man named Samson - who carries the base of the post on his shoulder like a backpack.
The muscular man stops at the place where the post will be placed and positions it without much effort. Finished his work, he goes to lunch.
"And where has that loafer gone?" Samson wonders.
"GET ME DOWN, YOU SLIMY!!!" Yells Trouble Shoes desperately from the top of the lamppost.
"Good morning, Mister Rector!"
"Indigo, good day to you too!" The rector returns the greeting of the Coach Indigo Zap. "Tell me, what can I help you?"
"Do you remember the young man I've told you about last day?" The girl with googles shows a boy in uniform. "Well, this soccer star is willing to sign for us, as long as you give him the pass to enter college and pursue a career in Electronic Engineering."
"Sounds good to me! But first, I'm going to look at his brainpower with a series of questions. Are you ready young man?"
"Ready!" The footballer responds.
"Let's get started then! First question ..."
After half an hour, Coach Zap approaches the rector. "And tell me, how is he doing?"
"Horrifying! Until now, he hasn't answered correctly any of the questions I'd made him!" Exclaims the scandalized rector, then he decides to change his strategy and ask the young athlete a fairly simple question.
"Let's see: tell me how much is nine squared."
The boy trembles in fear by the question, yet he's determined to answer. "Um ... eighty-five !"
"Oh! What a piece of animal you are!"
"Come on, Rector sir! Please give him the pass. Besides... he was only wrong by two !" Indigo says in defense of the boy.
The lives of the crew of a tourist cruise ship are in danger as the ship suffered an accident and was slowly sinking. People run in terror towards the boats to take shelter.
One of them, Randolph the butler, approaches to Spoiled Rich who was smoking her cigarette. "Ma'am ... the cruise ship is sinking!"
"I know that, Randolph." Spoiled Rich says unaware of the disastrous situation she was in. "Go to safety, but first tell me where can I find the captain."
"It seems he is supporting the evacuation of the passengers, ma'am!"
"Thanks Randolph. Be careful." Filthy Rich's wife says goodbye while looking for the captain of the cruise, taking the cigarette with her. Once she identifies him among the desperate crowd, she starts walking towards him.
"Excuse me, I'm very sorry to distract you under these circumstances but manners first… where is the smokers' boat please?"
An obese man walks through the streets of the city towards his place of employment. He'd says to himself that today would be a good day like everyday. Suddenly…
"Oh no! My heart!" The man exclaims before collapsing on the pavement.
Needless to say, he urgently needed medical attention and the citizens quickly called for an ambulance to take him away.
(Meanwhile, inside the hospital)
"... and as I was saying, lately I have been very distracted!" Discord was talking with another doctor while walking through the halls. "Note that two weeks ago I had to place a pacing mark on a woman's heart, and instead I did a stomach reduction! The other day I had to remove the appendix of a guy, but I don't know how I ended up removing his prostate!
And that boy of last weekend. Instead of removing his tonsils, I removed his- "
" Doctor Discord. Please go to the operating room."
Discord wastes no time and alongside with his colleague they go to the room where the patient waited. The man's wife, her face covered in tears, approaches to one of the auxiliaries.
"Miss, tell me, is my husband in good hands?"
"Of course. Dr. Discord is somewhat distracted, but he's the best surgeon in the entire country!" The assistant assures her.
An hour later, Discord leaves the operating room being received by the distressed woman. "Doctor, doctor! Did the operation go well?"
"Operation? It wasn't supposed to be an autopsy ?" Discord asks confused. "Don't tell me I got distracted again !"
At Canterlot High training ground, Coach Spitfire supervises those who were practicing soccer drills. Then Coach Soarin approaches to her.
"Hi Spitfire, I've already came from Principal Celestia's office. She and Vice Principal Luna are concerned about the performance of that Wallflower Blush girl." Soarin says taking a quick look at the teenager who practiced her midfield shots.
"No need to worry, she is quite promising." Spitfire assures him.
Her partner's comment intrigues Soarin. "Really?"
"Of course! For eight months she has been promising me to play better."
Author's Note
Another chapter done, and one more chapter to go. Anything related to real life is just coincidence (like a distracted doctor).
Equestria Girls Random Moments 2
" ... And we are back to the Rainbowfalls Formula One Race Event! ..." Shouts the announcer with great excitement at the car race that was taking place in said city. Then continue with his narration.
"... This is the last lap of the race and the 06th competitor, Trixie Lulamoon, keeps maintaining the lead! It's incredible to see how this young lady has taken advantage on her rivals since the begining of the race! They didn't see her coming!
The competitors are nearing the finish line ... and ladies and gentlemen, Trixie comes in first! Incredible feat! The crowd goes wild, carrying the winner on their shoulders while receiving the cup! Now, a few words from our winner. Right with you, Minute Man! "
"Here Minute Man, with our recent crowned champion and her team! A word to the press, Miss Lulamoon."
"Well, I can only say that Trixie's triumph was achieved due to the self-sacrificing work of my mechanics, Snips and Snails, who stayed up all night to ensure this victory." Trixie gathers her helpers, proudly displaying their faces in front of the cameras.
The reporter then resumes his interview. "I see! Did they spend all night fixing your car?"
"Of course not! They spent the whole night unfixing my rivals' cars!" Trixie exclaims.
Twilight Sparkle and Spike were watching a movie when the doorbell started ringing multiple times.
"Twilight, can you go see?" Spike asks.
"Why don't you go?"
"Because you are the one with opposite thumbs." The purple cub responds showing his paws to Twilight.
The teen girl with glasses resigns herself and in great annoyance gets up from the couch toward the door, thanks to whoever that person is still ringing the bell with insistence.
"I'm coming! I'm coming! They are getting more insistent nowdays!"
When she opened the door, a jaguar is shown roaring fiercely. However, Twilight is not impressed and shuts the door in front of the big cat's face.
"Who was it?"
"Nobody! It was just a jaguar!" Suddenly, something stops her steps. "Wait…"
Twilight reopens the front door of her house, glancing at the bell that was oddly positioned above the door's frame.
"And how the hay did you do to ring the bell!?" Twilight Sparkle exclaims in disbelief, while the jaguar is stumped by the girl's reaction.
Bon Bon strolls through the park, enjoying the fresh air emanating from the lush trees and listening to the chirping of the birds. Just then he comes across Lyra Heartstrings, who fumes from her mouth with a lit cigarette.
"Hi Bon Bon."
"Oh! Hi Lyra!" The two-colored hair greets her beloved friend with a wave of her hand, while removing the smoke that was heading towards her face. "Geez! Anyone who saw you would say you look like a fireplace!"
"I know Bonnie! This vice has me crazy. But neglect, I have been attending some talks about the harm of tobacco to health."
"And what have you learned so far?"
"Well," Lyra says, letting out another piece of smoke from her mouth. "I know that tobacco hardens the arteries, causing arteriosclerosis. Nicotine affects the pulmonary alveoli, making it difficult to breathe. And it is proven that tar causes cancer of the throat, or to the airways. "
Bon Bon is impressed by so much information about the prejudices that come with constantly smoking. "Incredible! I guess with all those dangers you will stop smoking."
"Don't be silly, Bon Bon. I will stop attending the talks, and everyone is happy." Lyra answers before continuing to smoke her cigarette.
A couple of madmen from a mental hospital were secretly chatting in the courtyard. The first one says to the second crazy person. "Hey, what do you think if we run away for a while and go to a bar."
"Sounds like a good idea to me. I'll go tell the others."
"Excellent! See you on the street!" Says the first madman.
Sunset Shimmer, the madhouse watcher, was looking them for a long time willing to figure out the plan for that pair of madmen. Next Sunset watches the first madman picking up a pebble from the ground, then approaches to her and places the pebble in her hand.
"Pay with this, please." Says the madman before going out the front door.
" That's odd. This one went out into the street and pays me with a pebble. " The flamed haired girl speaks to herself mentally. Suddenly, the second madman of moments ago appears before her with a pebble.
"Pay with this, please."
Like the previous one, this one puts it in Sunset's palm and then retreat to the outside. As if that were not enough, another madman appears with a a pebble as well and repeats the same procedure like the first two. After several madmen, Sunset discovered a pattern where each mentally ill patient "paid" her with a pebble before going outside.
Until a tall madman arrives holding a brick. "Pay with this, please."
"You stay here, buster! Where do you want me to give you change !" Sunset Shimmer cries.
A woman enters into a marine restaurant and takes a seat, being immediately attended by Derpy Hooves.
"Good afternoon, miss! What do you want to order today?"
"Tell me, is there a special dish in the menu?" Asks the refined lady.
"Well, I can suggest you an exotic and delicious hake dipped in black butter. It's for licking your fingers!"
Derpy's description increases the lady's appetite and she decides to order a side dish of hake. Finished her lunch, the lady wipes her lips having been more than satisfied.
"So, did you like it?"
"Very delicious was this hake! Could you repeat, please?"
"Gladly! Very - delicious - was - this - hake ! Very - delicious - was - this - hake ! Very - delicious - was - this - hake !" Derpy repeats the client's words several times like a parrot.
"Buy your 'Eternal Life Formula'!"
"'Eternal Life Formula'! Genuine elixir that will keep you young forever!"
"Don't go home without first acquiring your 'Eternal Life Formula'! Only fifty dollars!"
"Fifty? I thought we would sell them for two hundred dollars."
"Shut up, Sonata!"
"What we got here today!" A couple of officers approach the post the Dazzlings set up to sell their 'Eternal Life Formula' bottle. "If I remember correctly, we told you ladies we didn't want to see you around here again. Wasn't that right, partner?"
"That's right, partner. And we also warned you that if we saw any of you pretending to sell those things again, you were going to prison for fraudsters!"
Adagio pretends to be offended. "Are you implying that we put people's lives at risk just to get easy money? But our 'Eternal Life Formula' is authentic!"
"Yeaj right. And multicolored magical horses who speaks does exist in real life! Put them the handcuffs partner."
"On it!"
Soon, the Sirens were taken into the police car and to the Police Station where the officer in charge was waiting.
"Why are you bringing these three?"
"My commander, we surprised these girls wanting to swindle passers-by with adulterated products. According to them, this is an 'Eternal Life Formula', or something of the sort."
One of the officers give the jars to his superior, who examines it. Afterward, the commander addresses the Dazzlings. "And you have been arrested for the same crime before?"
"Yes sir." Aria Blaze answers.
"When?"
"In the years 1672 , 1729 , 1904 , 1923 , 1946 , 1955 , 1974 , 2000 and 2014 ."
A group of explorers - comsisting on Applejack, Pinkie Pie, Derpy Hooves and Trixie Lulamoon - was sent to study the depth of the unexplored jungle on a continent. Their mission was to study and collect information regarding all kinds of animals, plants or minerals that have never been seen, as well study the customs of the aboriginal ethnic groups if they existed.
Led by Applejack, the four girls set off, covering much of the jungle and encountering new species along the way. However, something has disturbed one of the explorers since the exploration began.
"Are you sure there are no cannibal tribes around here?"
"For the umpteenth time, Trixie: there is no such thing as cannibals! Since the last century, the existence of any of them has not been reported. That shows they disappeared." The blonde says annoyed at Trixie's insistence.
"It's true!" Adds Pinkie Pie. "The only places you could find cannibals would be in movies, TV series, or fanfics. The world is so civilized that nobody thinks on eating people's meat anymore!
I mean, it's not like out of nowhere a group of human-eating savages showns up and start chasing to make us their lunch."
If only Pinkie Pie hadn't opened her mouth, because highly complex human beings emerge from the trees armed to the teeth! (literally).
"It can't be! CANNIBALS!"
"Save yourself!"
"Don't you get tired of saying stupid things, Pinkie!?"
"SOMETIIIIIIIIIMES!!"
Soon, the four teenage girls saw themselves running for their lives dodging all kinds of arrows and darts that were aimed at them as the cannibals were chasing them.
After what seemed like an eternity, the group took cover behind the bushes.
Applejack took big puffs of air after running long enough. "... I think ... I think we lost them ..."
"Yeah, they're definitely not following us anymore ..." Derpy says. At that moment she realizes something. "Um… where is Trixie?"
"Wasn't she with you?"
"No. I remember seeing her with Pinkie Pie."
"And she was! I was pulling her by the sleeve of her jacket and-"
When the pink haired girl turns around, she is surprised that she only had a piece of Trixie's jacket in her hand. It was then that a nefarious and gtim thought comes to their minds.
"You-you don't believe she ... that Trixie is ... is-"
"Yes girls," Applejack sentences lowering her hat to chest height, "Trixie is gone…."
"And we left her to her fate!" Pinkie Pie starts crying, hugging Derpy. "I will never forgive myself!"
"Me neither, Pinks. Me neither."
The farmer joins the others in mourning Trixie's death. Or at least they believed that, because after twenty minutes ...
"Did you miss me?"
"TRIXIEEEE!!"
The young women pounce on the aspiring magician, wrapping her in a tight hug. "Never in my life I was so pleased to see you, Trix!"
"We had already given you up for dead! Thank God you got rid of those savages!"
"Certainly. But a little more and Trixie didn't count it."
Applejack asks Trixie how she managed to escape the cannibals, to which the white-haired girl begins her version of events.
"They surrounded me like wolves on a sheep, have tied me hands and feet leading me to their village where several people waited with knives, forks and spoons.
Then they put me into a huge cauldron full of water and the cooks started lighting the firewood while some of them chopped vegetables and potatoes. I thought my life came to an end, until Trixie's great and powerful brain concieved an idea!
I asked to speak with the tribal chief and told him that this beautiful and slender body would not be enough to satisfy the hunger of the men and women gathered around. So I convinced him to release me, and in return Trixie would promise to give them countless delicacies which he and his people would feed until their stomachs were full."
The girls were amazed at Trixie's cunning. Although there was still a doubt.
"And what kind of delicacies did you promise them in exchange for your life?"
"Very simple," says Trixie. " Cupcakes , apple cider , muffins, and cakes !"
With that said, Trixie gives the cannibals pass to take Derpy, Pinkie Pie, and Applejack away.
Author's Note
And thus, here ends the second series about the random moments of the Equestria Girls.
Once again I thank the reading and the faves on this fic. In another note, here I leave some curious information regarding some years I've placed in the Dazzling's random scene:
1923: Foundation of the Hasbro company that started as Hassenfeld Brothers.
1946: Birth of Bonnie Zacherle, the original creator of the My Little Pony toy line.
1974: Birth of Lauren Faust, creator of My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic.
2014: The Dazzlings debut with Equestria Girls: Rainbow Rocks .
That's all for now. Take care all of you these days and until next time!
Equestria Girls Random Moments 2
Stone age
A human group had settled on the banks of a huge lake, surrounded by mountains. Among this group of people Celestia assembles garments with hunted animal skins when Luna arrives carrying a round structure with a hole in the center.
"Sister, take a look at my new invention. This will revolutionize our lifestyle!" Luna proudly holds the carved piece of rock for her older sister and the other inhabitants of the settlement can contemplate.
"But Luna, the wheel has long been discovered."
"Wheel? What wheel?! This is going to be the toilet seat . Now with your permission, I'm going to use it." Luna retires to relieve herself privately and use her novel tool for the first time in human history.
Aria Blaze goes through the streets of a neighborhood looking for a lady everyone talks about on social media. As far as Aria knows, the woman is called Over Seer and apparently she is a 'fortune teller' since said woman tends to post videos of card readings, visions of the future and reveal secrets of unknown people she meets when traveling to the city center - mostly in Sundays.
Finally Aria is able to find the address of this self-proclaimed fortune teller, then the Dazzling rings the doorbell of the house.
"Who is it?" Ask Over Seer from the other side of the door.
"Try and guess, moron." Aria replies ridiculing the supposed fortune teller.
"I must admit, you are doing pretty well in the circus business, darling. None of us would have thought you would become so famous in a very short time." Rarity is amazed at Trixie Lulamoon's success when she and Fluttershy decided to pay a visit at her office one day.
"I know, my friend Rarity. The Great and Powerful Trixie not only have the best light show, the most seasoned acrobats and the best team of hillarious clowns..."
Trixie makes a dramatic pause "... but also have the honor of owning the greatest number in the history of circus AND the Ninth Wonder of the Modern World: The Capuchin Monkey on Motorcycle! "
Several streamers and confetti came out of nowhere after Trixie's announcement. "Unfortunately, Trixie won't be able to present him at this week's show."
"Oh, it's a shame." Fluttershy exclaims sadly, and with the desire she had to go and watch the little primate perform crazy maneuvers on two wheels. "And why you are not going to present him? Is the poor thing sick?"
"No. His driving license has expired." Trixie replies with annoyance.
Rover, Fido and Spot goes into the forest to try their luck finding gems or any precious stone they can find if possible. On their way they come across a huge stone with a message that said:
'PLEASE TURN ME BACK'
The Diamond Dogs are confused at the beginning but in the end they decide to heed the mysterious message and begin to turn the stone, hoping they could get a reward in the form of gems. After several failed attempts they finally manage to move the stone, finding another message within it and says:
'THANKS, I'M BETTER NOW'
It's recess time at Crystal High School. Indigo Zap and Lemon Zest chat about something until Fleur de Lis joins them.
"Hey girls, what are you talking about?"
"Lemon Zest was talking to me about her psychic powers ." Says Indigo, pointing Lemon who is nodding her head.
"Riiiight! If she have psychic powers, then I'm Songbird Serenate!" The pink-haired girl exclaims in a mocking tone.
"It's true, Fleur! I have the ability to guess what people is doing wherever they are, NO matter the place!" Lemon Zest ardently assures. However, Lis remains unconvinced; and she thinks Lemon is just bluffing, so she makes a proposal.
"Tell you that: when classes are over, I'll ahead to my house and you'll have to guess what I'm doing at that moment. If you guess right I'll give you 100 dollars, if don't you'll owe me 100 dollars."
"Done! And to make it fair give me the 100 dollars at once, so I can give them back to you if I fail. Indigo is my witness."
Once the deal was settled, everyone went right to their respectives homes at the end of the school day but not before Fleur gave Lemon Zest the money. Indigo Zap accompanies her friend to make sure the agreement is fulfilled. Ten minutes later, Lemon's cell phone starts ringing and she answers the call.
"Okay, I'm already at home. Now guess what I'm doing ."
"You are just talking to me by the cell phone. What else could you be doing at this moment!" Lemon replies while Indigo Zap laughs out loud at the tremendous prank they played on Fleur des Lis.
Photo Finish opens her gallery of paintings after five months of hard work. The event is being a success due to the huge number of people who are going to witness, admire and acquire the paintings.
At the moment, the girl with glasses presents one of her works to a couple of millionaires; although the man's wife puts her sights on a picture of smoked ham served with pineapple slices and young lettuce. The image looked so real that the woman felt the need to touch it.
Photo Finish notices this and rushes to the lady's hand.
"Wait! Don't touch it!"
"Why not? Is the painting still fresh?" Asks the wealthy man curiously.
"No. I just took it out of the oven."
Lyra Heartstrings and Bon-Bon are on the sidewalk, waiting for the traffic light to change so they can cross the track. While the teenagers waits, they spot a guy who apparently intended to enter a van by force.
The girls weren't sure if what that man was doing is what they were exactly thinking. Coincidentally, or perhaps luck, Sunset Shimmer was standing at the bus stop typing email messages from her cell phone so Bon-Bon and Lyra decides to go with her and clarify the doubt.
"Hey Sunset!" Bon-Bon says first. "Sorry we are bothering you, but please tell us if that van is being twocking ."
Sunset takes a quick look at the situation and her eyes opens wide as she understands what this was all about. "Oh my gosh! The van is actually getting twocked away! We must stop him!"
However, neither Bon-Bon nor Lyra join Sunset to prevent the theft of the vehicle. There is an awkward silence between the three girls until Lyra breaks the silence. "Meh, no need to worry then. That guy won't get very far."
"And why is that ?" Sunset asks with bewilderment.
"Because the truck belongs to the Municipal Kennel. And from what can I see, it contains several huge and rabid dogs with the sole desire to tear people apart."
"She's right. Look!"
Bon-Bon points in the direction of the stolen pickup truck that wobbled from side to side. From inside the thief's desperate scream could be heard along with the multiple barking and grunting of the enraged dogs.
Author's Note
Hello everyone, and welcome back!
This fics erves as my second story about random, goofy and absurd moment scenarios involving our favourite Equestria Girls characters. Because... why not?
Enjoy this multiple shorts series while I'll be writting more about it. Any comments and constructive criticism is welcome.
