Her Next Life As a Bug's Big Brother

by TundraStanza

Rating: teen
Tags: Thorax, Death, Alternate Universe, Human, Gore, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Dark, Comedy, Other, Pharynx
Length: 19576

Pharynx thought he knew his life pretty well. Then, the barrier at the Canterlot Wedding banged against his head, restoring memories of a past life. He was a girl?!

Pharynx used to be a top soldier in Chrysalis's hive. He had the drive to lead the army in her name. Then, his success came to a grinding halt when Cadance and Shining Armor's barrier launched the swarm away. But it did more than just eject him and his brethren out of the city. The shock restored some memories of a former life, one where he was a human with a slightly different set of chromosomes.

Armed with this knowledge, how will that change his approach toward events yet to pass?
---
Cover image by Frownfactory.

Published 2020-06-28 16:00:00 UTC
Last updated 2020-06-28 16:00:00 UTC

Ch. 1: Power of Love Conquers Amnesia

The Queen's order was absolute: Go feed! He had left the grand hall so that she could deal with the primary threat of ponies as she saw fit. While that was going on, he was rounding up locals and visitors of Canterlot alike. He could barely contain his saliva at the thought of so many options for breakfast, lunch, and dinner. He shook his head and mentally hissed at himself. He had to finish the takeover first. Taking pleasure in the feast of love energy could wait until later.

Pharynx and some of his fellow drones cornered a pegasus pony to a stray cloud. In his peripheral vision, he saw his brood mate hovering idly. If Pharynx had irises to roll, he would have done so. As it was, he simply pushed the thought of reprimanding his brother's weakness to the back of his mind. He led the charge against the pony.

A high-pitched, garbled scream caught his ear's attention. He paused and glanced back at the castle. It was just soon enough to see a giant, pink wave of magic approaching fast. He barely had time to open his eyes all the way before it collided with his entire squadron. In the seconds that it collided with and pushed him out of the city, something strange happened.

His life flashed before his eyes, yet it wasn't exactly his life.

A creature on two legs ran along a street. It had a bright red backpack. Its brown mane was tied in a ponytail. She was running late for her next class. Mom was sure to give her a lecture if she ever found out.

Pharynx tilted his head. How did he know what this girl was thinking? The image changed before his eyes. The girl was chopping vegetables on a cutting board. Her finished meal was something that both of her parents appreciated very much.

The moving pictures changed subject and setting even faster. She was riding an airplane to surprise her grandparents for Christmas. She stole a sip of Uncle Tommy's special drink when he wasn't looking. She was at the foot of her bed, praying for a little brother or sister. She was surfing the internet for completely legitimate means to watch animated shows.

Then, the images slowed down on one scene. The girl was well into her teen years and was getting on a public bus. She was going to meet with a friend who was a boy at the theme park. Pharynx remembered she was feeling sleepy and nodded her head for a few seconds.

A screeching of tires woke her up. She saw a wild driver in a vehicle on the wrong side of the road. That car's headlight glanced off the bus's front end. In avoiding a head-on collision, the bus had veered into the side of a bridge over another road. The bus was falling at a bad angle, enough that the pavement below was the last thing the girl got a good look at.

When his mind returned to the present, Pharynx was dumbfounded. Those had been memories of another life, and they felt too personal to be someone else. That had been him... her... in all of that. If it wasn't for the wind resistance, the other soaring changelings might have heard him sputtering in a mash of confused emotions. As if to save him from such an embarrassment, his body chose that moment for him to faint. His eyes shut while his jaw dangled open.

He woke up to the sound of a river running. He pulled himself along with his front limbs. When he looked down at the water, there were several ripple lines that distorted the reflection. But he could see it. That was the purple-eyed and fanged face he always had. However, he also felt like he was seeing himself with this face for the first time.

He tapped his hoof twice against his face. When he looked at the pattern of holes in his hoof, he felt slightly relieved. At the same time, he felt baffled. In his previous life, she was always told that you only lived once. No science could ever prove doubtlessly that reincarnation was a thing. The religions that believed in second lives were restricted to the third solid planet from the sun.

What was he supposed to do now? He supposed he should probably regroup with his hive. But to what end? A drone's job was to serve his/her queen. Did that extend to a plan to gorge on a large food source only to make it unpalatable for future consumption? Where he would have followed Chrysalis blindly until death before, now doubt was invading his thoughts.

Pharynx pondered as he lowered his head and took a drink. Maybe his queen wasn't nearly as absent-minded as that one mistake made her out to be. He swallowed one more sip of water and stood up. After wiping his mouth lightly, he decided. He had to know the condition of his home and every-ling still there.

Maybe he would feel better after making his brother hit himself again.

Flying through the invisible barrier brought a sense of ease to the changeling's nerves. No creature but another changeling could hurt him here. Any who tried would quickly lose their magic mid-cast, thanks to the queen's throne. Yet, the tension returned as he gazed over the land itself.

Any other day, Pharynx would have considered the dry and rocky terrain to be completely normal. Today, he felt nothing but empty as he looked at it. For all its faults, Earth had a tendency to make even a desert or a savanna pretty. Sure, these black jagged rocks probably discouraged intruders. It was just a shame that they looked so devoid of appearance.

As he landed close to the front of the hive, two changelings in purple armor saluted. Pharynx hissed at them, causing them both to resume standing at attention. He hopped up and climbed along a wall. He crawled through a hole in the rock before it closed up behind him.

For a while, he made a few turns crawling, flying, and trotting along the paths inside the mountain. He looked around, noticing a rather lacking number of fellow changelings. Sure, there were some here and there. But it hardly felt as full as it used to be. None of the changelings he passed had his little brother's eye shape.

Pharynx shook his head. What was wrong with him today? Sure, he didn't like it when other changelings ganged up on his punching bug, but he wasn't a worry earwig. He took a deep breath to calm himself before he wandered into the queen's chamber.

It was the largest opening in the entire cavern, minus the pointless spire room. The stone throne was as big and overcompensating as ever. There, the queen was lying down with a hoof holding up her head. She barely glanced at the returning soldier drone.

"My queen." Pharynx bowed deeply.

Chrysalis turned her gaze toward the ceiling. "Tell me why I shouldn't vaporize you for your incompetence at Canterlot."

'Returning home was a mistake.' Pharynx kept looking down without a readable expression. "For the same reason you spared the rest of your incompetent soldiers that were also at Canterlot."

"Touché." One of her eyes looked at him directly. "You're lucky I'm so perfect and merciful. Your punishment for disappointing me is simply a demotion to grunt drone. Crawl over the remaining soldiers if you want to earn your title of Commander back."

'Definitely a mistake.' He nodded once. "Understood, Your Highness. Permission to speak freely?"

Chrysalis sighed. "Out with it, Grunt."

"Has there been any word from my brood mate?" His left eye peeked up at her.

She spat at a far corner of the room. "As far as this hive is concerned, Thorax is dead to me."

"As far as... you mean, you don't know?" He lifted his head back to normal eye level.

"Scouts reported he was headed toward the Frozen North." She snorted. "Any drone who dares to venture without my permission doesn't deserve to be a part of my hive."

Pharynx's right hoof made an audible scratch against the rocky floor.

"Why are you still here, Pharynx?" Chrysalis lifted the spot where her brow would be. "Report to your wall space and rest. You begin your soldier training from scratch first thing tomorrow morning."

He was clenching his fangs, hurting himself to hold back a hiss. "Yes, Your Majessssty." He marched out of the throne room.

After the purple frilled changeling was gone, Chrysalis chuckled. "The best pronunciation to that I've ever heard."

Pharynx shape-shifted into a giant spider with scythe limbs. He growled and slashed at every single wall he nearly bumped into on his way to his resting hole. Maybe it was a waste of his energy. He didn't care at that moment. Once he made it back to a familiar set of holes, he shifted back to his default self.

In the years that he knew Thorax, he recalled thinking that he was nothing more than a burden to carry. He was playing with dolls when other changelings were getting in early practice for fighting and scaring. Heck, Pharynx even knew he enjoyed giving his brother a hard time about having a visible weakness. Contrasting that, the human girl's memories didn't have a sibling. Now that her psyche had one, she was losing him before she could really say she spent any time with him? That wasn't fair!

This changeling wasn't sure when he fell asleep. But he recalled feeling angry right until the moment he lost awareness.

Author's Note

Here comes another idea I thought I could get rid of just by typing a few words out.

Ch. 2: North For the Splinter

For the next six months, Pharynx trained under idiots that he was sure he knew more than. Sure, the changelings drilling him were loud enough, but they didn't know the first thing about flying straight, leading mock group battles, or espionage. After the first full day, Pharynx had inadvertently taken over teaching the troops everything they'd need to know in a fight and going undercover. The hive was back to calling him Commander one month before Chrysalis officially promoted him.

On the rare days where he actually managed to get some time alone, he tried his hooves at some smaller tasks. He managed to cook a cave fungus stew that, while not delicious, was at least non-poisonous. One of the toys stolen from a pony village resembled what the human girl's mind recognized as a Rubik's cube. He managed to scramble that and solve it within an hour. He knew that wasn't any world-breaking record, but it at least meant he was still capable of higher thought.

A couple days after his promotion, Pharynx was summoned to a meeting with several other changelings. Queen Chrysalis had a grander plan than a mere wedding reception in the ponies' capital city. She wanted eyes in multiple pony cities, ready to strike, gathering intel, and preparing to replace the existing rulers with puppet leaders under her control.

The recon to the Crystal Empire had to be small to not attract too much attention. Pharynx volunteered to scout it out by himself. Chrysalis thought the matter settled and assigned the other recon teams to Canterlot, Ponyville, and a few dummy locations, just to throw off any suspicious outsiders.

Pharynx was among the first to leave that meeting.

After passing through a layer of an idling snowstorm, the express train stopped at a station that looked temperate. A few ponies stepped off and trotted toward the Crystal Empire. Among them was a cream-colored earth pony mare. Her mane consisted of two complementary colors and she was wearing a pair of sunglasses. She mentally kicked herself when she realized two other ponies had her exact same color palette.

In this mare disguise, Pharynx slowly looked around for any pony suspicious. It seemed the visitors and returning locals were none the wiser. He quietly yet briskly walked along to the edge of the one-city empire. He knew that even a gentle, push-over like his brother couldn't resist feeding off the love this place was radiating on all sides. He had to be somewhere nearby.

When he came across a crystal newsstand, he grabbed a paper and flipped to a random page. A couple of crystal ponies nearby were chatting about some random subjects. Then, a subject caused him to flick his fake ear.

"Spike is so brave and glorious!" The crystal stallion lifted a hoof and slammed it down. "Did you know he even converted a changeling to the side of good?"

"Get out! Really?" The mare of a slightly lighter hue practically laughed.

"It's true!" The stallion insisted. "That changeling is so docile now, it can safely play with Princess Cadance's baby."

While the two were busy laughing, Pharynx folded up his paper and started trotting away. He tossed a chartreuse gem at the newsstand's counter.

"Keep the change," he said in a valley mare's voice.

"Thank you for your patronage, ma'am!" called out the worker behind the counter.

The Crystal Palace wasn't hard to find. While every single building was shiny and difficult for Pharynx to look at for too long, the palace turned out to be the tallest and largest. At the center of the open, ground level floated a heart-shaped crystal that spun and glowed. He was glad he had snagged his sunglasses now. As he approached, one guard in Crystal Empire armor happened to trot in front of him.

"Excuse me, ma'am." This crystal pony's voice rang deep. "Can I help you?"

Pharynx cleared his throat to adjust his own voice to a mare's. "Yes, I was wondering if I could see the princess."

The stallion smiled slightly. "Well, if you just want to see the princess, just wait around anywhere in the empire. She makes regular trips to ground level to comfort the citizens."

Pharynx tilted his disguise's head. "Isn't that a bit risky?"

"No more risky than any one of us stepping out for some fresh air." The guard leaned down. "I see you're not from around here. Hope the culture differences aren't too appalling."

"Not really appalling." Pharynx shrugged. "Just disappointing."

"I'm... sorry?" The guard blinked twice.

A black, crusty hoof smacked the underside of the guard's face. He flipped onto his back and saw stars spinning around his vision.

"Don't get up." Pharynx trotted away. "I'll show myself inside."

One guard near the top of the staircase let his eyes wander. "I spy..."

"No." His partner shook his head.

"But I haven't even said what it is yet." The first guard raised his brow.

"It's a crystal." The second guard deadpanned. "It was a crystal the last five times. It's a crystal this time. It's always going to be a crystal."

The first sighed. "I'm just so bored."

"Then why did you apply to this position?" The second stared with scrutinizing eyes.

Their conversation was interrupted when they saw their ground-level colleague galloping up to the floor they were on. He looked like he was short on breath.

"Urgent matter!" He panted. "There's a rogue changeling in the Empire!"

"Uh... no." The second guard tilted his head. "He's docile. In fact, he's probably playing with Princess Flurry Heart right now."

"Not that one!" The colleague face-hoofed. "Another one! It was a different color and it just beat up a guard downstairs! We've got to get word to the princess right away!"

The first guard nodded to his partner before giving a quick salute. "Yes, sir!"

All three started galloping along the hallway. About ten paces in, both of the upstairs guards spun around. They tried to grab their colleague and to hold him against the wall. He gasped in surprise.

"What are you doing?!" He struggled against their combined strength.

"Pin Amethyst downstairs is a new recruit." The first guard huffed. "He doesn't give us orders. But you wouldn't know that, would you? ... Changeling?"

The struggling guard went limp. "Well, chitin."

Pharynx shape-shifted into his large spider form. This pressed the two crystal guards into the opposite wall, temporarily dazing them. He used this opening to shape-shift back to his default self and run along the wall. As soon as the guards managed to regain their bearings, they galloped on the floor after him.

He turned a corner and crawled along the top of a doorway. He saw several long tables with chairs, food trays, and the dozens of eyes staring at him. This was the Crystal Guard's mess hall. Before he could turn around to double-back, a few unicorns were already casting spells at his position. One of those spells caught the back of his neck. He ended up tumbling onto the floor just outside the doorway.

Some of the pegasi guards dog-piled on his position. At the same time, the pair of guards from earlier had caught up. After a bit of growling and hissing, Pharynx sighed and closed his eyes.

"Where's the real Pin Amethyst?" asked the first guard.

"Downstairs." Pharynx surrendered.

The captured commander changeling contained conflicting emotions. On one hoof, his first instinct was to think that the crystal prison cell he was being held in was kind of gaudy. On the other hand, his human mind thought the aesthetic was pretty and mesmerizing. Even the chains holding back his front hooves and clamping his horn were made of crystal. At least this empire had some consistency going with its theme.

Pharynx snapped out of his trance when several hoof steps echoed. Most of them stopped halfway while one set continued. After a few more seconds, he saw the holed hooves he was familiar with. Those soft eyes all but confirmed who he was looking at.

"Um, hey th-" The changeling outside the bars stopped mid-sentence and stared wide-eyed. "Pharynx?!"

"Thorax." Pharynx attempted to nod, but the chain holding his horn was a bid too rigid to allow that.

"What are you doing here?" Thorax placed a hoof against the bars. "I hoped I wasn't the only changeling that left the hive, but I never would have thought you'd be the next one."

"Heh." Pharynx smirked. "Well, I'm surprised you survived the Frozen North without some-ling else with you. So, we're even." He coughed. "Anyway, it's not like I came here to check on you or anything."

Thorax blinked twice. "Which in your language, that's exactly why you came here." He rubbed his forehead. "Does Chrysalis know you're here?"

Pharynx shrugged his wings. "Officially, I'm here because she wanted me to gather information about the Crystal Empire's defenses. Unofficially, I think I'm done with her beetle chitin."

"Really?" Thorax's ears perked up. "That's great! Does that mean you'll learn how to share love instead of stealing it?"

"Slow down, little brother." Pharynx grimaced. "I'm not about to give up who I am just to join the Flowers and Crystals Club." He averted his vision. "Anything happens to the hive, the queen is responsible for it. Chrysalis abandoned that foundation when she refused to confirm every-ling's life, death, or incapacity. If she doesn't follow her own rule, why should I follow her?"

Thorax twiddled his hooves. "So... what do you want to do, then?"

Pharynx sighed. "I want to make sure you're alright, that these ponies aren't making you even weaker than you used to be."

Thorax mulled over some thoughts. "If I convince them to let you out, will you promise not to steal any love without permission?"

"Do they have any other options we can actually eat?" Pharynx attempted to tilt his head, but the chains kept him vertical.

"Oh, do they ever!" Thorax smiled. His eyes practically sparkled. "They've been giving me fresh fish every day!"

Pharynx hummed and muttered, "I could kill for some unagi roll."

"What?" Thorax blinked twice.

Pharynx cleared his throat. "I mean, that sounds really good." He looked right at his brother. "Fine, I promise not to steal any love without the victim's permission."

"Great! I'll go tell every pony else!" Thorax walked briskly away.

"I'll just hang here." Pharynx mentally slapped himself. 'Oh, gosh. I'm turning into my past life's dad.'

"You're sure he's telling the truth?" asked Shining Armor.

"My brother may be... well, is... aggressive, blunt, and mean sometimes, but he doesn't lie," insisted Thorax.

"What about impersonating me?" Pin Amethyst waved his hoof around at himself.

"Actually, he did tell us that a different-colored changeling beat you," said the first crystal guard from the stairs. "That was technically true."

"Permission to call you a feather-face, Corporal?" Pin Amethyst glared.

"Permission denied." Corporal grinned.

"So you're just going to let this rogue element go?" Pin Amethyst looked pleadingly at Shining Armor. "Your Majesty, he punched me in the face!"

Princess Cadance leaned in from beside her husband. "We will personally compensate you for any basic medical procedures you need until the end of this week."

"Mm... okay." The ground-floor crystal guard sulked. "But I'm still upset."

"Noted, Private." Shining Armor magically floated up a set of keys. He unlocked the cell and its prisoner's chains. "Alright... Pharynx, was it? If you don't mind, I'd like to ask some questions. Would you follow us?"

Pharynx cracked some of his sore joints. "I do mind, but you'll ask them anyway. So, what does it matter?"

Shining Armor slowly put his keys away. "Wow. Starting to see what you meant by 'blunt'."

There was much clattering of plates. Unlike the mess hall's cozy feel with all of the tables meshed together, the royal dining hall was more open and had several different server ponies running around. Most of the table's occupants were eating a mix of fried tofu patties and veggie blends. Meanwhile, there was an ever-cycling of two plates of fish in front of the changeling guests.

At first, Thorax was the only one chomping down like a starving animal. After watching for a couple seconds, Pharynx had shrugged and followed his little brother's example. At the rate they were scarfing down the fish, they sounded more like pencil sharpeners than mouths. A couple belches signified when they were done eating.

"My goodness." Crystaller Sunburst adjusted his glasses. "I can see the family resemblance in your... appetite."

Pharynx cocked his head. "That's a dumb comparison."

Thorax folded his hooves. "Please excuse him. This is his first time at a dinner table."

'Oh, is that what you think?' Pharynx levitated a napkin up. He used it to pat around his mouth. Then, he folded it neatly before setting it down on his empty plate as a standing triangle.

Flurry Heart babbled happily at the sight of the napkin trick.

"Or... not?" Thorax stared with wide eyes. "When did you learn to do that?"

"Something I picked up while you weren't around." Pharynx folded his front hooves behind his head. 'Before I was born a second time, but let's stick with one mind-blow for now.'

"Tora! Tora!" Flurry Heart wiggled her hooves around.

Cadance chuckled. "She wants to play with you some more, Thorax."

"Sunburst, would you mind going with them?" Shining Armor turned.

"Sure, no problem." Sunburst stood up and magically grabbed the small cradle.

Flurry Heart teleported onto Thorax's back. The two of them laughed as he galloped around and out of the dining hall. Sunburst walked briskly after them. Wordlessly, Cadance dismissed the serving ponies. All that remained were herself, Shining Armor, Pharynx, and the stallion carrying the water pitcher.

"Nice offspring you have there." Pharynx glanced in the direction that Thorax and Flurry had left. "Did you hatch her yourself?"

"Uh..." Cadance blushed. "That's not exactly how we... make babies."

Pharynx waved a hoof dismissively. "Yeah, yeah, birds and bees. Got it." He made eye contact. "So, what did you want to talk about?"

Shining Armor set his napkin down. "What is Chrysalis up to right now?"

Pharynx took a deep breath and gave the rulers the rundown. He told them about Chrysalis's ambition to take over Equestria, the reconnaissance teams to various pony cities, and the plan to collect all the love. Expressions on the listeners ranged from initial shock to understanding to confusion.

"But if she intends to replace Celestia and Luna," interrupted Cadance, "how will the sun and moon keep moving when they're supposed to?"

Pharynx shrugged. "Beats me. She said something about a pocket watch device that could mimic that power, but I mentally filed that under her insanity."

Shining Armor tapped his chin. "Would you be willing to try acting as a double-agent, collecting more information about her plans while pretending to work for her?"

"Out of the question." Pharynx crossed his front limbs. "In case my demonstration earlier today didn't make it clear, I'm a fighter, not a silver tongue. You want me on the front lines against her, I'll gladly throw a punch. But I won't be able to hide my intentions from her."

"Hmm, you've got a point there." Shining Armor nodded.

Cadance tilted her head. "Aren't all changelings good at-"

"Lying and stealing?" Pharynx filled in.

"I was going to say 'illusions'."

Pharynx scoffed. "Have you met my brother? Most of his illusions seem to physically hurt him when he doesn't believe in himself. Part of the reason why Chrysalis failed at invading Canterlot was because she forgot that not all of her changelings were built to fight. The other part was some magical McMuffin, but that's to the credit of ponies."

Shining Armor blinked. "What is a... nick muffin?"

Pharynx shook his head. "Don't worry about it." He stood up. "If you'll excuse me, I'm going to go track down Thorax."

Before he left, he grabbed the pitcher of water and chugged down the rest of its contents. He exhaled and set the pitcher back down. Then, he promptly marched out of the room. Shining Armor sank into his seat.

"Any thoughts, Shiny?" Cadance looked with concern.

"Several." He groaned. "First and foremost: Is everything he said true?"

"I don't know," admitted Cadance, "but he does seem genuinely affectionate with his brother."

Shining smirked. "Closer than me and Twily?"

"About the same, actually." Cadance moved her front hooves like an invisible balance scale.

They sat in silence while the remaining server went about picking up dirty dishes. Eventually, Shining Armor pulled himself out of his chair.

"I'd better start setting up the new training regimen."

Cadance stood up. "And I'm going to send a few letters."

Author's Note

~Let's screw the timeline again...~

Ch. 3: Pretty Wings

Pharynx was on a jog along the sidewalk. She had on her typical red jacket and sweatpants. She also saw the edge of a white headband. She saw a few changelings and people pass her by on the other side of the street. She glanced back at the tiny, angry sun chasing her down. She smiled, knowing that the poor thing was just doing its job.

When she turned to look in front of her, she was in a long line. Every time one person walked away from the cashier, three behind them vanished without any sound effects. It was her turn.

"Do you want anything, sweetheart?" asked Chrysalis with his usually deep voice.

"Hmm, I'll just have a small number seven." Pharynx nodded while batting her eyes.

A box came out with a tray balancing on top of it. She grabbed the box with her hand, leaving the tray to float in a pink aura. She turned left to an arcade machine and tapped a button. The screen showed a unicorn on two legs. The words "Home Run" appeared. Pharynx then walked along a bowling alley to retrieve a pin.

One of the pins grew purple wings and jumped. "She's not just a pony with a lousy attitude. She's downright evil!"

Pharynx shook her head at the silly pin. "In an infinite world of possibilities, is any Zinthos really so Azareth to a false idol?"

"I'm sorry, Pharynx Nee-chan!" Thorax had tears in his eyes. "I let you down."

Pharynx wrapped her arms around the cute cinnamon roll. "Foolish little brother, I'll never desert you."

...

Clouds shifted around the room. Eventually, Pharynx found himself floating in a star field. He stared dully at his holed hooves. A sliding closet door appeared and opened in front of him. A dark purple alicorn stepped out, shook a loose red jacket off behind her, and turned her attention at the changeling.

"Pardon the interruption, but your dream intrigued me." She held a hoof against her chest piece. "My name is Princess Luna."

"Really?" Pharynx let his wings buzz a bit before stopping them. "What was so special about my dream?"

"There were some creatures other than the changelings that seemed unlike any combination of species real or imaginary." Luna swiveled her hoof around a bit. "What were they?"

"Well, those were human beings, obviously." Pharynx smirked. "They were the dominant species of my past life. It's only natural I'd see some of them in my sleep."

"You... believe in reincarnation?" She raised her brow.

"Lady, I'm living a reincarnation!" He spread his front hooves wide. "Or maybe I'm a memory transplant. Could be either one, I suppose."

"Fascinating." Luna scribbled down something on a dream clipboard before both it and the quill vanished.

"Wait, you're not going to blab about this, right?" Pharynx swam backwards.

"I keep dreams confidential unless I consider their material dangerous to real life, limb, and psychological health."

"Alright, just so we're clear," relented Pharynx.

He woke up to the feeling of something soft against his shell. In a sleepy panic, he tried standing up and spun around wildly. It took him a minute to remember that she knew what a blanket was. After a few pushes upward and back, he managed to crawl out from under the fabric. His surroundings looked sparkly in the morning sunlight.

There was a scratchy noise that caught his attention. After a look around, he saw Thorax leaning over a desk. A pen was scribbling in a journal upon said desk. Pharynx quietly crawled closer.

"You keep a diary?" He asked.

Thorax yelped and turned his head. "Oh, Pharynx! Did you sleep well?"

Pharynx popped his neck on either side. "Yeah. More or less. Whatcha writing about?"

Thorax continued scribbling magically. "Just some recent events and thoughts."

Pharynx looked over his little brother's shoulder and read along:

My ~~brood m~~ big brother showed up yesterday afternoon. His name is Pharynx. He stuck up for me against some meaner changelings back when we were much younger. I mean, he hit me too, but he still loved me... in his own way.

Anyway, I was playing with Flurry Heart at the time, so I only heard about most of this story from the guard ponies. He showed off his strength to one guard before outrunning some others. It took a whole mess of them to capture him. That's just how tough he is.

I didn't know it was him until I saw him in that cell. Chrysalis sent him to the Crystal Empire for a recon mission. But he said he was done working for her, after she assumed I was dead or unimportant. So, I asked him if he'd be willing to learn how to live without stealing love, just like I am. He didn't exactly say yes, but he didn't say no either. So, I'm hopeful.

"Ugh, some creature get me a waste bin." Pharynx dry heaved. "That's way too sweet."

"Mm, I guess I've written enough for now anyway." Thorax shrugged, set his pen down, and closed his little book. "Ready to go get breakfast?"

Pharynx blinked twice. "They give you two meals a day?"

Thorax smiled. "Three, actually. Sometimes four, if they have a mid-afternoon snack and tea."

Pharynx's jaw dropped. 'This empire's rulers are already spoiling my little brother! How am I supposed to compete with that?'

After breakfast, Shining Armor requested Pharynx to follow him. They went to yet another crystal building. A symbol of a sword and a shield were carved into the wall. The large entrance door stood right between these symbols. Inside, they passed a couple rooms. The first was filled with training dummies and was otherwise empty. In the next, some ponies appeared to be drilling spear practice.

Shining Armor knocked on the door of a third room. A slot briefly moved open near the top before closing again. Then, the door opened, allowing them inside.

"The Prince and Royal Captain is here, recruits!"

Several ponies, both crystal and not, stood and saluted. The majority of them were wearing a simplified version of the guard armor. When Pharynx entered the room, the pony at the door tensed up.

"Sir! A changeling!"

"At ease, Lieutenant." Shining Armor held up a hoof. "This is the one I told you about last night."

"Oh, of course." Lieutenant didn't stop clenching his front legs, but he tried to avoid staring.

As he followed the prince to the front of the room, Pharynx muttered, "What is this about?"

Shining Armor stood on the platform and stomped once. "Cadets of the Crystal Empire! First of all, I'd like to thank each and every one of you for volunteering to serve this nation."

Pharynx stared off into a random spot of the ceiling as the speech went on. He was waiting for the prince to get the point. His human thoughts felt obliged to agree. She knew that fluff and cushion to a speech was good for motivation, but it also meant that she'd be waiting around for several hours of the other person's hot air. It was her art teacher's lecture on the color magenta and how it didn't actually exist all over again.

The changeling shook his head when he heard Shining Armor switch topics. He was letting the recruits know about the potential threat that Chrysalis and her loyal changelings could pose. If any present wanted to leave, he wasn't going to hold anything against them. After all, citizens had more freedom to protect their loved ones directly than a soldier bound to duty. However, soldiers were still needed to give said citizens time to brace themselves for said threat or to retreat.

"And now, I'd like to give the floor to my associate to give a quick rundown on what to expect." Shining Armor turned and stepped back. "Pharynx, if you would, please?"

'Oh! An improvised presentation. This ought to be fun.' Pharynx stepped up and cleared his throat. "Alright, maggots! I don't like repeating myself! So pay attention the first time, and you might live in the near future!"

Expressions on the attendees ranged from shock to stiff. A few in the back looked uninterested. Lieutenant looked oddly relieved at Pharynx's tone. Shining Armor watched in amusement.

"Most of you may have this idea that a fair fight is face-to-face and out in the open. Well, go ahead and take a dump on that idea and flush it down to the sewer gators! Chrysalis's army does not know the meaning of 'fair fight' and she will rip apart your resolve from the inside! Soldier drones are taught almost immediately after birth to strike the weakest filth first. They drag it into a place that even a claustrophiliac would deem too tight! If your fellow soldier has been alone for two minutes without a partner, do not trust them when they suddenly come back. A changeling has already infiltrated your ranks and will likely knock you out when you were counting on them to help."

For a while, Pharynx gave a whole speech on everything he taught his former underlings. He included some facts about what changelings could and would not do. Contrary to the wild rumors, changelings could not turn other creatures into new changelings. Changelings could not mimic fire breathing of dragons and spells specifically created by magical prodigies. It also took at least a week of study to nail any pony's personality flawlessly.

One of the disinterested ponies in the back called out, "You don't look so tough!"

Pharynx stared directly at the heckler. "Care to repeat that, Private... Onyx?"

The ponies sitting right next to Onyx scooted away slightly. The slightly shimmering, lavender crystal unicorn crossed his front hooves. "I could take you with one hoof behind my back!"

"Cadet..." Lieutenant glared at him.

Pharynx waved his hoof dismissively. "No, Lieutenant. Let the hatchling keep digging. In fact, let's all give him a chance to prove himself. Maggots, clear a path!"

The rest of the recruits stepped apart, making a wide opening in the center of the room.

"You serious?" Onyx scoffed. "What happened to you changelings fighting from the shadows?"

"I can improvise." Pharynx stepped down into one end of the opening. "Can you?" He taunted with one hoof.

Onyx snorted. "You're going to wish you stayed where you belonged, bug!"

The challenger galloped forth while charging up his horn. Shining Armor gasped and set up a couple shield spells, protecting the observers on either side of the room. Onyx fired a magic beam. Pharynx stepped to the left, leaving the beam to get swallowed up by the front wall. The crystal unicorn kept running along with his horn pointed out.

Pharynx calmly put his right front hoof on his back and leaned down. As the unicorn horn passed above him, he spun around. His back leg tripped Onyx and flipped him over. Onyx growled and cast another beam spell. Pharynx hopped over that beam with a pirouette.

Onyx chuckled and cast one more time. This spell magically grabbed a decorative spear on the back wall. With a jerk of his head, Onyx willed the spear headfirst at his opponent. Pharynx shape-shifted into a rock, falling to the floor. This left the spear to fly at the caster. The crystal unicorn gasped until a pink shield appeared in front of his face. The spear impaled itself slightly into the magic shield.

"That's enough, Cadet!" Shining Armor trotted by, dispelling his shield and taking the spear to the back of the room.

Pharynx trotted over and offered his hoof. Onyx grit his teeth, but slowly reached up to accept the help. Pharynx pulled the crystal pony up to a stand.

"Figures, a changeling would cheat to win," Onyx grumbled.

"Uh, yeah. Weren't you listening to a word I said?" Pharynx tilted his head. "Besides, you were practically telegraphing your moves." He turned and looked around at the other recruits. "Spend as much time here as you can. Learn from your commanding officers. You'll never be a one-pony army. But maybe, you'll have a slight chance of fighting as a combined unit. Until then, keep your ears open and your egos shut."

"That was impressive back there." Shining Armor was leading him back to the castle.

"What? Showing a rookie where the ground was?" Pharynx asked in disbelief.

"No, that you showed restraint." Shining Armor looked behind him. "I was half-expecting you to singe his fur."

"An effective way to beat an opponent is to use less energy than they do." Pharynx kept walking along. "Showing off without substance tends to create vulnerabilities. Enemies in a real battle take advantage of any weak points they can find."

Shining Armor looked forward and mulled over the thought. "That is one way to look at it."

"You disagree?"

"Well, in my experience, the biggest boom tends to get the best results."

Pharynx smirked. "Sure, but you had the power of love on your side. Unlike the colt that was fighting for his own pride, you and the princess had substance to back up your spectacle. Different magic, different results."

Shining Armor chuckled. "You got me there."

He watched the scene unfold in front of him. His little brother was checking corners every so often. The baby princess was giggling to herself while sitting on his back. Meanwhile, Pharynx tried to see if a different angle would help him understand. After crawling up and tailing them for about thirty minutes, he decided that standing upside-down on the ceiling did not make Thorax's actions any more sensible.

Thorax had already been accepted as a guest of royalty for months by now. What did he have to gain by hiding like a thief in his new home? Also, he wasn't even trying to blend into the environment. Dark colors stood out against the vibrant crystal palace. At least the alicorn looked somewhat like she belonged.

For a second, Pharynx wondered why he wasn't getting an ache from blood rushing to his head. He mentally brushed it off, reminding his human self that he was a changeling now. He noticed Flurry Heart hold a hoof up to her mouth, as if to hold back her laughter. Had she already been with Thorax on this mockery of a stealth mission? Then, Thorax dove and rolled past an open hallway while Flurry Heart glided after him.

Pharynx rolled his eyes while silently continuing his ceiling crawl. He actually caught himself smiling at their childish antics. He wondered when was the last time he had genuinely found something so low-risk and amusing. Was such a joy only found in her life? He shook his head and returned his attention to his brother's antics.

At this point, Thorax had brought Flurry to a corner around from a stone door. A guard in crystal armor stood on either side. One of them looked up at Pharynx. They blinked twice.

"Don't mind me, gentle-colts." Pharynx waved a hoof dismissively.

Thorax used the conversation to crawl under the guards' view. He and Flurry pushed open the door. As soon as it closed behind them, the guards spun around. The guards looked at each other before one of them slammed it open again. Thorax and Flurry Heart were inches away from grabbing a cookie jar.

"I'm fairly certain I said that Flurry Heart can't have any extra sweets." Princess Cadance trotted into view. "Not after what happened last time."

Thorax chuckled nervously. Flurry seemed less restrained and teleported right onto her mother's back. The filly gave her a big hug. Cadance nuzzled her before returning her attention to the matter at hoof. Thorax's ears lowered as he slowly trotted out of the dry goods storage room.

Cadance glanced upward. "What do you think?"

Pharynx shrugged. "I'm surprised he got as far as he did. Maybe spending time away from the hive was what he needed to hone his natural instincts."

Thorax perked up. "Did you... Was that a compliment?"

"If you want it to be, go ahead and take it that way. It doesn't matter." Pharynx pulled himself off the ceiling and flipped over. He held himself up by letting his wings buzz.

Thorax leapt up and let his wings dance. His hooves embraced his older brother. "Ha ha! I knew deep down, you cared!"

"H-Hey! You're going to make us crash!"

Pharynx's warning came too late. Both changelings went tumbling to the floor. Cadance and the guards flinched before taking a chance to look. Flurry Heart clapped her little hooves. As soon as Thorax realized what had happened, he rolled off and apologized profusely. Pharynx groaned and sat up.

Maybe his annoyance broke. Maybe the scene was just too absurd for his human girl's mind to process. He didn't know. But all of it compounded into a high-pitched chortle coming out of his mouth. Thorax's eyes opened wide. He couldn't recall a moment where Pharynx ever laughed, much less like a young mare.

As if to relieve some of his tension, Thorax chuckled. This was a first step for his brother and he wanted to savor it. Neither of them noticed the little tingling sensation in their wings. They were too busy laughing with their eyes closed.

This wasn't what Pharynx had in mind. He wanted to keep tabs on his brother, not sign up for replacement limbs together. But every time he tried shape-shifting his wings back to what he was familiar with, he felt a tugging sensation. He exhaled and allowed his body to go to its new default.

They weren't exactly a bad addition. In fact, his human side was fascinated by how these violet wings shimmered. She wondered if it was similar to the effect of fireflies in their lower backs. She briefly thought about looking it up. He face-hoofed, mentally reminding her that there was no internet here.

"Are you okay, Pharynx?" Thorax trotted up beside him. "You've been staring at that mirror for a while now."

Pharynx glanced at his brother's wings. They shimmered whenever they moved too. Yet, these were a teal glow. For a moment, he felt himself drifting closer to them. He shook his head.

"Yeah, I'm fine." He whipped up his hoof. "Don't you dare tell any pony that I was powdering my nose."

Thorax tilted his head. "Why would I say that? You don't have any powder on your nose."

Pharynx sighed. 'Right. I briefly forgot he's still new to figures of speech.' He waved his hoof dismissively, then put it down. "Never mind. If you and Flurry were going after cookies, does that mean you're hungry?"

"Oh, no." Thorax chuckled. "I was just teaching her the importance of stealth and silence, two of our greatest tools in the field." He tapped his muzzle. "Though, speaking of hunger, I don't feel it at all."

Pharynx opened his eyes in surprise. "You don't?"

"Yeah..." Thorax looked down before returning his eyes to level. "Maybe it'll come later. I remember lunch being pretty big."

Pharynx shrugged. "I'm still not used to getting lunch, so maybe it was a lot."

"You want to hang out until dinner?" Thorax smiled in excitement.

"Uh... sure." Pharynx blinked twice. "What do you want to do?"

"There is only room for one ruler of the spots and stripes!" Thorax fiddled with a toy giraffe.

"Augh, curse your sudden yet completely foreseeable betrayal." Pharynx spun a plastic zebra over its back.

"Ho ho ho! Wicked chortle noises. Now perish!" Thorax tapped the giraffe against the zebra.

The door opened and Sunburst stepped in. "Hey, guys. Dinner is just about re- Oh my Celestia!"

Pharynx yelped out, magically grabbing both of the toys and shoving them under the bed. "Sunburst! Wh-What did you see?"

"Nothing! Nothing." Sunburst averted his eyes. "I didn't see your action figures at all!"

"Well, good!" Pharynx stood up and cleared his throat. "Next time, knock before you see if we're doing nothing!"

Thorax looked between the two fidgety creatures. "Why are you guys shouting?"

Pharynx slapped his brother's shoulder. "This conversation is over! We'll be right up."

"Okay." Sunburst adjusted his glasses before galloping off.

Author's Note

And then I pictured a "That's all, folks!" at the end of that gag.

Ch. 4: A Familiar Stranger

To the untrained eye, the badlands hadn't changed one bit. For the queen of the hive, she felt years sliding off her shell. In truth, it was only one month since she had deployed her spies. Out of the choice locations she had sent them, only the ones from Canterlot had reported back. At one point, she had placed a random pebble in her mouth and rolled her tongue around it.

The dummy locations, she could understand. Those spies were meant to distract from any pony that happened to be tailing them. Plus, she figured a larger group would cause more worry, more of a diversion of the enemies' firepower. No, what bothered her was the lack of word from her reconnaissance in Ponyville and the Crystal Empire. Those were smaller teams more familiar with disguise and low-profile tasks.

Chrysalis spat her pebble out at a passing drone. The worker changeling screeched out in pain before locking eyes with her queen. Immediately, she stopped her noise and hurried out of the throne room. Chrysalis sighed and fiddled with a beetle-shaped object made of dark and bronze metal.

"I didn't overlook anything." She flipped the 'beetle' onto its back. "I couldn't overlook anything. I'm the queen. That means I know everything by default." She let out another sigh and set the 'beetle' down, right-side up. "What's taking them so long?"

Princess Cadance didn't have to wait long. An old teacher went to work right away. He fastened clamps onto her horn. She had been given warning that such a treatment would hurt. She had carefully read and signed the waiver agreement before it had reached this point. She was familiar with feeling this pain, but usually it was after a manner of days.

This time, the stress on her internal power was instantaneous. She gasped for breath. Sweat ran down either side of her face. She heard a constant drumming noise. Folding her ears down only made it worse.

She wasn't sure how long it had been, but she found herself floating in the room she had been standing. Glancing to her left and right, it seemed her wings had decided to flap in rhythm with her heartbeat. She held her hoof against her chest, taking in as much as she could with one breath. She paused to a count of four. Her wings slowed down, enough that she floated back toward the floor.

When she exhaled, she straightened her hoof out. Her other three hooves had found solid support. She brought her hoof back to her chest. Three more times, she slowed her breathing down. Gradually, her wings relaxed and folded against her sides.

Once her body was in a more steady condition, she trotted over to a table. A teapot had already been set up with a candle underneath. Without even touching it, she willed the teapot to pour its water into a cup. After turning the teapot back onto its stand, she took the cup and willed it over to her teacher.

He grabbed it in a levitation spell and took a sip. "Are you really the same little filly? The ankle-biter student I remember wouldn't have made it past two seconds without having a heart attack. Pardon the pun, Your Majesty."

"It's definitely uncomfortable, no denying that." Cadance's tail swished. "But, right now, it feels like I can manage."

"Well, good." He whispered something into her ear before taking another sip. "If you're serious about what's to come, you won't use the safe word until Chrysanthemum, or whatever she calls herself, is standing in front of you."

"She won't get the jump on us again." Cadance poured a cup for herself. "A couple of changelings on our side is a start, but we should train ourselves too."

" 'If a princess doesn't lead, how can she expect her subjects to follow?' ~Wisdom of Clovers and Stars, page 42." He nodded. "Still, this last lesson I have for you is but one tool. It is up to you to know when to wield it."

Cadance gently smiled. "Don't worry. I haven't forgotten what you've taught me."

Pharynx knew they had to prepare. Given his lack of communication with the queen, he guessed that it wouldn't be much longer until Chrysalis moved on with her plan out of desperation. He had to get these crystal guards up to par as soon as possible. That was why he was standing in a gymnasium type room with a line.

Each time one pony stepped up, Pharynx surrounded himself with a bit of bluish-green flame. For the next several minutes, he performed mixed styles of hoof-to-hoof combat in what she recalled as "mirror matches". However, this was no arcade game, and a loss could result in worse than a mere seventy-five cents if he wasn't careful. Sometimes, he got to fly against his opponent. Other times, he got to cast simple spells. He was always using a new face.

Some of his sparring foes managed to flip him over in a daze. After recovering from such rounds, he nodded at them in approval with his own form. To the rest, he gave tips on weak points he discovered on his borrowed forms. Perfection didn't exist, and he knew all of them could strive for better.

Once he was done with the line, he stepped outside of the barracks and looked to the sky. Not a cloud could be seen. A stray water bottle floated in his peripheral vision. He grabbed it with his hoof and sniffed the top.

"Is this poisoned?" he asked rhetorically.

"Not unless plain old water is poisonous to you, Commander Pharynx."

He spun around and faced the other speaker. It was a gray-white unicorn with a short, black mane. Pharynx's human side winced at the sight of too much makeup on the pony's face. Yet, he was more concerned with discerning where he had seen her previously. He crossed his front hooves and lowered his voice.

"Did the queen send you to check on me?" He deadpanned.

"Pfft. Oh, that is just precious." The mare snickered. "Did the city of pretty rocks soften you up? Paranoia doesn't suit you. But I do like what you've done with the purple glitter."

"Violet fluorescence of shared love."

"Yeah, that. Whatever."

Pharynx glared metaphorical daggers. "What do you really want?"

"Oh, you don't have to act like you're impressing any-ling. It's just you and me here." She magically yanked up the water bottle, unscrewed the cap, and dunked its contents all over the changeling.

He shook several droplets off himself. "Grr..."

"I want to extend an invitation, Pharynx." The mare batted her eyes. "You see, some buddies and I have decided that Chrysalis's end-goals no longer coincide with ours." She used her tail hairs to wipe his face. "We'll still replace some ponies, but we'll be the ruling kings and queens of wherever we end up."

"Not interested." Pharynx spat.

"Oh, you can't fool me." She pressed her hoof under his muzzle. "I saw the hungry bug inside your heart for years. You can't deny that having power would be the greatest feeling."

He slapped her hoof away. "You're the fool, Cantrip. Every king, queen, prince, and princess has eventually run into a problem that power couldn't solve. Maintaining supply lines, means of travel, and dealing with the blame for everything that the ruler can't handle... that is not a position I would ever want. Take your offer and shove it down your nectar-hole."

"Tch." The unicorn, allegedly Cantrip, rubbed her front hooves. "You're no fun, shooting down dreams with your logic."

"I wouldn't have needed to, if you had any logic to begin with." Pharynx turned around and trotted away.

Cantrip's horn glowed green. In the next instant, she vanished with a last, echoing voice. "Hope you're less of a grouch when we see you again!"

Pharynx rolled his eyes and headed back into the barracks. He found his way to the locker room and grabbed a towel from a pile. He dried off the rest of his shell and sighed. 'So, Cantrip is on her own as well. If Chrysalis is overlooking that, then she is really tripping. Actually, would that even be possible? None of the fungi in the hive's caverns are that kind of shrooms.'

It was kind of possible that they no longer needed to eat. At least, that was one conclusion that Thorax and Pharynx drew. Another possibility was that they had some kind of sickness, but there was less evidence to suggest that. After all, even when they only ate half of their meals at the table, their bodies remained at their natural sizes. Exercising and playing didn't tire them out any more than it usually did. If anything, the two guests felt better ever since their wings gained brighter hues.

That was a little difficult to notice after that evening's meal. Sunburst had taken to rocking Flurry Heart in her personal cradle. Meanwhile, Shining Armor was staring intently downward. Cadance was massaging her temple with her hooves. Thorax's eyes were open wide.

Pharynx had somehow managed to fold his napkin into an origami swan. "Yeah..."

"I mean, on one hoof, it's good that there are other changelings against Chrysalis." Cadance shifted her feathers in place.

"But on the other, their intended measures are just as bad as hers." Shining Armor poured some extra wine into a goblet.

"Stealing love meant for some pony else is wrong, no matter what." Thorax poked his fork against the fish bones on his plate.

"But what can we do about this splinter pack?" Sunburst looked over. "Until they actually strike, we have no leads."

Cadance took a deep breath and exhaled quietly. "We won't get anywhere while we're tired and worried. Let's sleep on this and work out a plan in the morning."

As if to agree with her mother, Flurry Heart yawned. She wrapped herself up in her own wings and a tiny blanket. Almost everyone present in the dining room felt a bit of tension leave their hides. Pharynx was the exception, still not entirely sure if the wrapped creature was capable of stealing souls. He shivered as everyone got ready to leave and/or clear the table.

A high-pitched scream broke Pharynx out of slumber. Thorax groaned and looked around, still half-asleep. Pharynx trotted over and opened the bedroom door. It was just in time for a blur of blue to gallop hysterically past.

"Trixie, wait!" A different voice said. The pony attached to it trotted by, short on breath. "I haven't recovered after that long-distance teleport."

She panted, paused, and looked to her right. She blinked. Pharynx blinked right back. The unicorn gasped and backed up to the opposite wall.

"They're already here!" she exclaimed.

"Huh?" Thorax rubbed his eyes and looked out the door. "That sounds like... Starlight? Is that you?"

"Oh, Thorax!" Starlight's expression shifted from a sigh of relief back to panic. "Look out! A bad changeling's right next to you!"

Pharynx jumped out of the way just in time. A cyan magic beam from the unicorn zipped underneath his hooves. He did a somersault and shape-shifted into a copy of the unicorn mare. He pinned her to the floor.

He kept his own voice to say, "I'm not a bad changeling. Stop blasting and listen for a minu-"

Pharynx suddenly found himself unable to move or speak. His personal space had been covered in a slightly pinkish crystal. As he fell onto his side, he could barely turn his eyes. His shape had been forced back to his default self. He saw the unicorn panting for breath. Despite her fatigue, she looked determined with another spell charging in her horn.

"Starlight, stop!" Thorax jumped in front of Pharynx. "He's my brother!"

Starlight blinked twice. "Wait, huh?"

"Well, technically he's my brood mate who hatched before I did." He shook his head. "Anyway, he's good now!"

The unicorn lowered her brow, pointing her horn at the younger changeling. "How do I know you're the real Thorax, and not some other changeling pretending to be Thorax?"

Thorax sighed. "After Spike stood up for me, Princess Twilight said..." He shape-shifted into a lavender alicorn, complete with her voice. "As the Princess of Friendship, I should set an example for all of Equestria. But today it was Spike who taught me-"

"Okay!" Starlight held up her hoof and fizzled her horn. "You don't need to do the whole speech! I believe you."

She turned her horn and shot a smaller blast. This spell disintegrated the crystal, allowing Pharynx to draw breath. He stood up and breathed loudly for a few counts. Thorax shifted back to his changeling self and gently rubbed his hoof against Pharynx's back.

"Starlight, this is Pharynx." Thorax smiled. "My brother, like I said."

"Uh, nice to meet you?" Starlight held out her hoof. "Sorry about thinking you were bad."

"Meh, not the worst reaction I've gotten." Pharynx smirked and shook hooves. "Five more of you, and the pony army would have no trouble destroying your enemies."

"Eh heh heh..." Starlight chuckled nervously. Then she looked up suddenly. "Oh! I almost forgot." She cast a long-range spell through the hall. Her blue companion was still running her hooves, even though she was magically being pulled backward. "Trixie, this is Thorax and Pharynx. They're reformed changelings, on our side. Understand?"

Trixie stopped her screaming and nodded slowly. Then, Starlight dropped her spell and lowered the other unicorn to the ground. Thorax held out his hoof for a greeting. Trixie, however, shuffled behind her companion.

"Look, I'll believe Starlight that you're on our side. Just... don't come any closer right now, okay?" Trixie shook in place.

Starlight tilted her head. "Hey, your wings look different."

The two changelings flapped their respective wings once each. They shimmered in teal and violet respectively.

"Yeah, they do. Something about living and loving, I guess." Thorax scratched the back of his head.

Pharynx cleared his throat. "Any particular reason you ladies were running around like Cerberus was on your tails?"

"Shoot, that's right!" Starlight turned on her hind legs. "The changelings have captured Princess Celestia, Luna, Twilight and her friends! We need help from the Crystal Empire as soon as possible!"

"I know the way to Princess Cadance and Shining Armor's room." Thorax trotted along briskly.

The other three followed him at a similar pace. Pharynx took the long trek to ponder some thoughts. 'Chrysalis is enacting her plan now? Her intel can't be up to date. I never reported back. Unless...' He grit his teeth. 'Cantrip. I knew that drone was full of crud, but I didn't bother to measure how much crud. Who the crud measures crud?'

Author's Note

*sighs*
I'm not proud of the poop joke.

Ch. 5: "I Cast Darkness!"

As soon as the group got into the royal wing of the palace, Thorax slammed face-first into nothing. At least, that's what it seemed to be until Pharynx also ran into the invisible thing. They grunted in confusion while tapping a wall that wasn't a wall. Things were a little clearer when Starlight managed to walk through with little more than a tingle up her spine.

"It's some kind of anti-changeling shield," she deduced.

"Hmm..." Trixie moseyed on through the barrier and felt the magical ripple. "That's convenient, but why is it here?"

"Either Shining Armor was paranoid..." Pharynx took a step back.

"Or some of the hive is already in there." Thorax lightly tapped the wall and looked directly at Starlight. "Be careful, you guys."

Starlight nodded before giving her companion a glance. "Ready for this?"

"Th-The Great and Totally-Not-Trying-To-Hold-In-A-Nervous-Leg-Sweat-Why-Do-You-Ask Trixie is totally not trying to hold in a nervous leg sweat! Why do you ask?" Trixie's tail went rigid as she galloped next to her friend.

The two unicorns barged in through the large doors. Well, Starlight barged in. Trixie slid in two seconds after the break-in. Their expressions went from tense to surprised. As if to reflect their surprise, Cadance and Shining Armor dispelled whatever they were charging and stared wide-eyed.

"Wait, you're Twilight's student, right?" Shining Armor asked. "And since you got through while my shield is still up, you're the real deal."

As Starlight was about to answer, she got a look at the rest of the bed room properly. At least ten of Chrysalis's changeling drones were slammed against the walls and ceiling. The bodies were crumpled and oozing. A few of the gossamer wings had been torn off.

"Ew..." Starlight coughed. "I was coming to warn you about the changeling threat, but I guess you already know."

"Only as far as their attempted ambush here." Cadance lightly patted down some of her bed mane. "What's the news from Ponyville?"

Starlight pointed a hoof behind herself. "Maybe we should let Thorax and Pharynx in first so we can exchange information all at once."

"Oh, right." Shining Armor shot a spell out the door. A few seconds later, Thorax and Pharynx walked in. Then, he cast the shield again to be around them, not blast out from him.

"Right." Starlight nodded. "So, first of all..."

She talked about her dream interaction with Luna and how the changelings dragged the princess right out of it. Likely, they had already gotten what they wanted from Canterlot. Then, she touched on how Twilight and all seven members of the harmony table were replaced. Shining Armor and Cadance told Starlight and Trixie about what they knew of Chrysalis's plan, with Pharynx affirming the story.

Shining punched a wall. "How did they get Twily?! She's the Element of Magic for Celestia's sake!"

Thorax held a hoof under his chin. "Maybe, they brought a piece of Chrysalis's throne with them."

Pharynx shrugged. "Or at least the same kind of magic absorption stone. It might not have taken her powers away completely, but it would be enough to catch any pony off guard."

Shining Armor's eyes were blood-shot as he marched out of the room. "Guards! Ready all of the troops! We're going to march for the changeling hive in the Badlands immediately!"

Cadance opened her mouth and held up a hoof. But she immediately closed it and shook her head. "I don't blame him for being mad, but we should probably plan for this."

"Plan with what?" Trixie piped up. "We're down to one out of four alicorn princesses! No offense, Your Highness, but I don't like our odds!"

"You know, if I weren't such a nice guy, I'd be offended when ponies talk about powerful creatures and somehow forget about me."

The five living occupants of the room looked around. After a double-take, Starlight spotted a familiar face and body structure reclining on the bed. Discord seemed bored while reading a pamphlet covered in gibberish. The unicorn trotted over cautiously.

"Is that Discord?" Starlight lowered her brow. "How do we know you're the real Discord?"

The draconequus deadpanned and snapped his claws. The changeling corpses shed themselves down to skeletons and danced around sporadically. The bed sang an opera. Outside, the sky depicted the sun and moon playing 'Ring-Around-The-Rosie'. The floor turned into soap and Trixie tripped. Thorax, Pharynx, and Cadance flapped their wings to avoid slipping.

Discord snapped with his lion paw, returning everything to its state before he arrived. "Shall I continue?"

"Will you help us, please?" Starlight asked. "The changeling hive has practically taken over Equestria!"

"Bah, let them run around for a bit." Discord continued his fake-nap. "It has been a while since monsters last ruled the land, present company excluded."

Pharynx spat. "Gee, thanks."

"It's more than just a land takeover." Cadance trotted up. "They've captured Celestia, Luna, all of Twilight's friends-"

Discord was suddenly upright. "They took Fluttershy?!"

"Yes!" Starlight nodded.

His eyes briefly turned solid crimson as he leaned in close. "Where?"

"To their hive in the Badlands," answered Starlight. "That's where."

Suddenly, everyone was standing in a lightly wooded area. Cadance, Trixie, and Starlight looked around in confusion. Thorax and Pharynx recognized the landmark and knew they were at least within an hour's flight from their old home. Shining Armor and several of his sleepy soldiers were piled in a stack. After tripping over one guard, the prince caught sight of the draconequus.

"Discord..." He seethed.

"Why Young Prince, why do you sound so angry to see me?" Discord brushed some tail feathers off his dust.

"I don't know." Sarcasm dripped like venom. "Maybe the fact that you practically gift-wrapped Equestria's magic for Tirek has something to do with it!"

Discord blew a raspberry... into a nearby tree. "I said I was sorry."

"Apologies imply that you'll try to avoid repeating the wrong actions." Shining Armor crossed his front hooves. "How do we know you're not looking to betray us to the changelings or any future enemies?"

Discord scoffed. "I don't know what the future holds! As for the changelings, they stole my Fluttershy! I won't willingly work for creatures when they steal my stuff!"

Shining Armor turned around and muttered, "Anything you say can and will be used against you."

"Speaking of Fluttershy!" Discord magically donned a camouflage army suit and a flying pig steed. "I'll save you!"

He flew forth with haste. However, as soon as he crossed over a cliff, the pig and his outfit vanished into the aether. He yelped and grabbed a dying tree branch before pulling himself up. He tried snapping another flying pig into existence. When this pig flew past the cliff, it turned into a vapor as well.

"That's not going to work," said Pharynx.

Discord turned his head with a creaking noise. "Pardon vous?"

Thorax took a step forward. "Chrysalis's throne is made of a specially mined stone. It absorbs magic from anything other than changelings that enters her territory. That's how she keeps the hive safe."

Starlight trotted up to the cliff and tried casting a light beam spell. It left for about two centimeters. Then, the spell evaporated. She grimaced as she thought a bit.

"But if I can't teleport us over there, how do we get there?" Discord crossed his arms.

"Walking." Starlight found a makeshift path of small cliffs down the rocky slope.

Discord grabbed the skin under his eyes. "But I haven't walked anywhere in centuries!"

"Your Majesty, what should we do?" asked one of the crystal armored soldiers.

Shining Armor looked down. His eyes danced left and right. Then, he looked up at the hive mountain. "A fake-out. A larger force will charge in, making them think we're doing a desperate frontal assault. Meanwhile, a smaller force will find a back way entrance and try to dismantle the magic-absorbing throne inside."

"How do we hold off changelings when they have magic and we don't?" Onyx brought up a point.

"You brought your spear, didn't you?" Shining Armor stared at the formerly egotistic recruit. "Get creative."

After a brief discussion, the two forces were decided. Shining Armor would lead the Crystal Empire soldiers in the frontal assault. Meanwhile, Pharynx and Thorax would lead the smaller force through the hive's interior. Starlight, Trixie, Discord, and Cadance would be part of the smaller force.

Shining Armor and Cadance held each other in an embrace and kissed. Then, Shining Armor started his long march in front of his army. After about five minutes, the smaller group hopped down to begin their own trek. The amount of sand and dry rock was draining to look at.

"Are we there yet?" Discord whined. His wings had gotten droopy.

"If we were, don't you think the hive would be right in front of us?" Trixie shook her head. "Why did we let him come along?"

"Because of his potential once we get rid of Chrysalis's throne." Starlight glanced over her shoulder. "Discord could just sneeze the changelings away if he wanted to."

"That's right!" Discord crept up and placed a talon on Trixie's nose. "I'm here because of what I can eventually do! Which is a little more than can be said about you, little pony."

Trixie whacked the limb away. "At least Trixie does not moan and whine about having to use her perfectly toned legs."

"Pah, as if you know anything about being a body-builder!" Discord chuckled. "You're a street performer. Lying to your audience is all you're good for."

"Hmph!" Trixie stuck her face up. "You'd know all about lying, wouldn't you? Your own body doesn't even know what species it's supposed to be!"

"Would you two quit it?!" Starlight panted after her outburst. "We need to save our strength in case we have to fight or run away from changelings inside. Don't waste it fighting each other before the job's done."

"Fine." Discord took his hoof and foot and power walked. "I can be the bigger pony and let this go."

"Not if Trixie lets it go first!" Trixie broke into a canter.

Starlight face-hoofed before continuing to walk along.

Cadance mulled something over while glancing at the remaining two of the group. "Is there anything else changelings can shape-shift into besides ponies?"

"Well, sure." Thorax held out a hoof and moved it up and down. "We can turn into rocks, curtains, birds, snakes, gryphons, and even larger versions of ourselves if we want to."

"So, disguising yourselves as a draconequus isn't beyond your scope?" Cadance wondered.

"Probably." Pharynx shrugged. "It wouldn't be comfortable to hold such a weird form for longer than a few minutes, but it's doable. Why?"

"We need a password between the six of us. It's in case we get separated and some changeling tries to impersonate us." Starlight trotted into the conversation.

"Exactly." Cadance nodded.

"Oooo! Can we pick our own codenames?" Discord smiled and shook curled up hands in front of his chest. "This is Chaos1 to Blue0! Come in, Blue-Zerooooh!" He tripped over what looked like a horned skull. He got a face full of dirt.

Trixie smirked. "How about 'Klutzy Draconequus'?"

"Klutzy Draconequus?" Starlight tapped her chin. "Hmm."

"Klutzy Draconequus." Thorax tilted his head back and forth. "It's weird enough to work."

Pharynx nodded. "I can remember Klutzy Draconequus."

Cadance wrote some air cursive with her hoof. "Klutzy Draconequus."

"Klutzy Draconequus! / Klutzy Draconequus! / Klutzy Draconequus! / Klutzy Draconequus! / Klutzy Draconequus!" All five of them said at the same time.

Discord picked himself off the ground. "I don't think I like this password."

"Then, it's settled!" Trixie chuckled. "Now there's no way we'll get fooled by an enemy changeling."

Suddenly, the long walk was the last reason Discord felt tired of this mission.

There was a cacophony of battle cries filling the air. It was time for the small force to move away from the most-trodden path. Each creature kept an eye out for any enemy changelings. It looked like Shining Armor's force was doing its job and attracting a lot of changelings to the front.

As Pharynx quietly crawled along, he caught a glimpse of some stray lines of blood. A couple changelings were carrying away an unconscious pony guard toward the higher floors of the hive mountain. He wondered why he was feeling internally pained by the sight. This feeling wasn't all coming from her mind. He shook his head. He was part of a team and they had a mission to complete.

The entrances in the base of the hive rapidly shifted. He was relieved that Thorax seemed unperturbed after being away for so long. The unicorns, alicorn, and draconequus were a little more shaken by the environment. Discord in particular yanked on his tail, not used to having to pay attention to where he was at all times.

"So far, so good." Starlight's darting eyes betrayed her calm tone.

"Yeah, right into the wasps' nest where one wrong move gets the love drained from out of us." Trixie shuffled her hooves. "Speaking of which, are either of you feeling hungry?"

"Um, not really." Thorax looked back.

"Nope." Pharynx shook his head.

"But you could still get hungry somewhat soon?" Trixie's teeth chattered as she asked.

"Actually, I haven't really felt hungry since I met Spike." admitted Thorax. "Once I made a few friends, feeding felt not so important."

"Besides, your narcissism would give us heartburn." Pharynx trotted along while carefully watching the tunnels.

Cadance stifled a chuckle.

"Wow." Discord grinned, but kept walking.

Trixie tilted her head. "What?"

Starlight trotted up. "So, which way do we have to go?"

Pharynx pointed up. "Up a couple ladder-like rocks..."

Thorax crossed his front hooves. "Down a spiraling coral..."

"Through a bear-shaped cave..."

"Take a left at the birds and keys..."

"And into the throne room proper. / And into the throne room proper." The brothers finished together.

"I'm surprised you remember that," said Pharynx.

"Yeah, I just needed you to say the first direction and then I've got it." Thorax smiled.

"Yes, well... if you two are finished reciting nursery rhymes," Discord said while holding out his arms, "I've got a Fluttershy to save!" His last word echoed off the rocky walls.

"We should probably keep it down," reminded Cadance. "We don't want the changelings that are still in here to find us."

"Oh, please." Discord waved dismissively. "Your shiny hubby's got the whole hive distracted out the front."

Pharynx scrunched his mouth. "Actually, from what I saw, only a third of the hive's staying changelings were fighting outside."

"At worst, it was less than one fourth," Thorax added, "depending on how many changelings Chrysalis has hatched since the big wedding in Canterlot."

"How many children does a queen need?" Trixie shook her head in disgust.

"Wait, does any pony else hear... humming?" Starlight's ears perked up.

After a careful listen, there was a rhythm of buzzing noises. It was getting louder as the seconds ticked by.

"It's a full patrol!" Thorax's breaths became short and panicky.

"Chitin," muttered Pharynx.

Author's Note

*in my best impression of a Dungeon Master's voice*
And that's where we'll stop for today's session. See you next week!

Ch. 6: This Didn't Happen In the Cartoon

The frontal assault was doing everything it could to keep the changelings occupied. The crystal pony soldiers started spinning spears above their heads, whacking away incoming flyers. Every hiss was met with an angry yell. When one pony soldier got bitten and dragged away, a different changeling got impaled through the head. At first, it seemed like a calculated risk.

That being said, more changelings seemed to be flying out of the hive to replace the fallen numbers. Shining Armor's troops did not have any reinforcements. He kept shouting orders. This was to make sure his army kept up the pressure and also to keep as many enemies off the inside squad as possible. But a quick scan of the situation showed that morale was dropping every time a pony got picked up and knocked unconscious... or worse.

"We've got to pull out!" exclaimed Onyx.

"To where?!" shouted a crystal pegasus. "They've got us surrounded!"

"Any time you want to bring up one of those 'plan' things, it would be appreciated!" Discord looked impatiently among his current allies.

"How do we plan for this?!" Trixie stared at him with just as much frustration. "We don't have our magic and my illusions certainly can't beat them!"

"Wait a minute." Starlight did a double-take. "Trixie, do you have smoke bombs?"

Trixie scoffed. "Is that a trick question?"

...

As a patrol of changelings rounded a corner, they heard a sharp whistle. They turned their growls toward what appeared to be a blue unicorn carrying a weighted pack. She was laughing and taunting them. When they dove down after her, she threw down something and a puff of smoke appeared. The changelings grunted when they couldn't find the pony.

Another laugh drew their attention to a different cliff. It was the blue pony again. They growled and flew straight at her position. She threw down another ball of smoke and showed up at a different cliff. She stuck out her tongue, drawing the changelings' ire. She galloped down a cavern pass as the changelings followed her. A couple took a different cavern path.

"A clever use of misdirection." Cadance was hiding at a position that could overlook the entire string of events.

"Mm, I guess it wasn't too bad, for a bag of puff tricks." Discord rolled his wrist around for emphasis.

"I'll take it." Trixie smiled wryly.

"That worked better than I hoped." Starlight watched the changelings leave the vicinity.

Trixie(?) appeared in a puff of smoke and trotted up to the group.

"Klutzy..." prompted Starlight.

"Draconequus! / Draconequus!" Both of the Trixies said while the one with the pack shifted back into the form of Thorax.

Discord grumbled. "I really think we should get a different password."

"When did you pick up teleportation?" Pharynx tilted his head.

"A little before you came to the Crystal Empire." Thorax passed the supplies back to Trixie. "But since my favorite disguise didn't have a horn, I never found a good time to use it until now."

Cadance chuckled. "Well, no time like the present."

"Speaking of present, what do we do now?" Trixie looked around. "We kind of ran away in a panic and I didn't see any of the landmarks the ends-in-x-brothers described."

Pharynx deadpanned. "That's a dumb way to group us together."

"She does have a point," admitted Thorax. "We kind of got turned around while confusing that patrol."

"Actually, I had a thought!" Starlight slapped a hoof over her mouth before coughing. "I mean, if that's alright with everyone."

"Sure, Starlight." Cadance smiled encouragingly. "What is it?"

"Two of those changelings in the patrol earlier didn't chase after Thorax." Starlight drew a diagram in the loose dirt with her hoof. "If we follow them, where do you think that would end up?"

"Huh." Pharynx nodded. "I guess lightning can strike twice."

"If the changelings know an enemy is inside the hive, their natural instinct will be to send a few directly to the throne room to protect the queen!" Thorax's eyes glinted like his wings. "Good thinking, Starlight!"

"We should probably get going." Cadance looked around. "Before they realize we gave them the slip."

Pharynx grabbed onto Starlight and Thorax grabbed onto Trixie to glide them down. While unable to gain any elevation, Cadance was glad to find that her wings could still be used to slow her descent to the lower levels. Discord, however, ended up tripping over the ledge and rolling several times along his body's length. He landed face-first at the cave they needed to enter.

He groaned as he picked himself back onto his feet. "What do you changelings have against soft cushions, or at least a bed of flowers?"

"Plant life can be used to hide enemies," stated Pharynx as a matter of fact.

"Cotton and feathers can get stuck in our holes." Thorax wiggled his hoof before continuing to walk.

Discord mumbled, "What do you have against rhetorical questions?"

The inside team climbed some mossy steps. Once near the top, they peeked over the edge. A few changelings in their own variant of armor stood watching. The team ducked back down.

"Right, they moved to protect the queen." Thorax twiddled his hooves. "Maybe that part of the thought was more important."

"If I was sure they didn't know I switched sides, I could probably fool them with a fake missive." Pharynx sighed. "But with Cantrip's information, they'd probably grab me before I could even finish calling them maggots."

"No use beating yourself over what's already done." Cadance shook her head. "We just need to think of something else."

Trixie shuffled a hoof around her pack. "I'm all out of smoke bombs."

"We need another distraction." Starlight tapped her head lightly. "Something big, loud, and... really out of place."

Discord glanced around at his team. "What? Me?"

"Yeah." Pharynx nodded. "Your existence alone might make them short-circuit. I mean, make them think too hard."

"Please, Discord?" Starlight pressed her front hooves together. "The sooner we can get past them, the sooner we can rescue Fluttershy and the others."

Discord exhaled. "Alright! For Fluttershy!" His paw scrambled around Trixie's pack and pulled out a microphone. He then hopped onto the ledge and put on his trademark comedian grin. "Hello, changelings of the hive! How are you doing this pleasant nighttime even though the sun should have been up hours ago?" He chuckled. "When I first arrived, I thought I was beside myself! Then, I realized it was one of you."

The armored changelings chittered with confused expressions. One tilted his head. Another looked left and right, wondering what was going on.

"Hello?" Discord tapped his borrowed microphone. "Is this thing on?" He walked over a few steps as eyes followed him. "Why don't you shape-shift those frowns into smiles?"

All of the guard changelings growled and hissed. They used their wings to hover and slowly approach the draconequus.

"Well! It seems you just don't appreciate good stand-up! I'm leaving!"

Discord tossed his microphone and scampered away on all fours. The changelings picked up the pace and flew after him in a frenzy. Once they were far enough away, the infiltrators made a dash for the cavern. They pushed aside a vine-tied curtain before ducking around the opening.

"I can't believe that actually worked." Trixie deadpanned.

"Well, it's like Pharynx said with lightning and striking." Cadance smiled slightly.

"That was one for Discord." Pharynx waved a hoof dismissively. "I've yet to see his number two."

"I hope he'll be okay." Thorax glanced at the opening.

"Come on, it's Discord!" Starlight insisted. "If he can handle dealing with Twilight and her friends on a semi-regular basis, a few changelings can't faze him."

They waited around for what felt like five minutes. Thankfully, there was no sign of the changeling guards returning to their post. The draconequus, however, was also absent. Trixie tapped her hoof against the floor and groaned.

She turned to face Starlight. "If he doesn't come back soon, we should probably get going. The sooner we break the dumb absorption throne, the sooner we can get our magic back and free everyone."

"Maybe we should go back and look for him?" Thorax shrugged.

"That would waste time and the chance he gave us," Trixie pointed out.

"Hello!~"

A voice called out gently. The draconequus pushed the vines out of his way before resetting the curtain. "Fellow rescuers, I'm back."

Cadance gave the rest of her team an unsure look before returning her attention to their chaotic ally. "Klutzy...?"

"Huh?" Discord nodded. "Oh, yes. I'm very klutzy. But I heard one of those nasty changelings talk about the way to the queen. Follow me!~"

He walked lively past the group toward another set of caves. The rest of them followed, but at a significantly slower pace than they had before.

Trixie leaned her head close to Starlight. "We all know that's not the real Discord, right?"

"No point in stating the obvious," Pharynx retorted in his own hushed voice.

"This way!~" 'Discord' slithered into a cave to the left. "Our friends are right through here!~"

"Clearly, he's trying to lead us to a trap," muttered Thorax. "We should definitely take the other path."

Trixie clenched her hoof before putting on a determined look. "You guys go on. I'll keep the faker occupied."

"What?" Cadance did a double-take. "Trixie, no. That would be suicidal."

Trixie wasn't swayed. "If no pony follows him, he'll chase after us and that'll blow our chance of ever reaching the throne room in any destroying state."

"But..." Starlight grabbed her friend's shoulder. "Trixie, I can't do this! Not without you! I couldn't even take charge at the town festival without your support."

"Yes, you can." Trixie tapped a hoof against Starlight's chest. "Look, I know you said you're too scared to be a leader again, but you're really good at it." She moved her hoof off to the side. "You don't need magic to figure out what to do next. If you won't trust yourself, then trust in the words of your best friend." She turned her hat around and started trotting for the left cave.

Starlight reached out a hoof but stopped. Pharynx and Cadance urged her to move to the right cave. She looked one more time at her departing friend before reluctantly parting ways. Thorax trotted next to Starlight, offering a one-hoofed hug before they kept going.

"Hey, Discord!" Trixie's voice called out through the wall. "Wanna see a new trick I came up with? I call it... the changeling hanker-snare!"

That exclamation was met with a hundred hisses, only to be followed by deafening silence.

A lone unicorn slowly trotted into a large chamber with a high ceiling. She gasped as her eyes rested on the floating, cocooned bodies of Princess Celestia, Luna, and a few ponies in Crystal Empire armor. She tried to force herself to walk further inside, only to pause again at an echoing laugh. It almost sounded like her friend, but it was too deep and distorted.

"One little pony, all alone." The queen of the hive laughed while hanging effortlessly from the ceiling. "How will I ever thwart such a daring rescue attempt?"

Several nearby pebbles shape-shifted into her changeling drones. Starlight went wide-eyed as they all swarmed her position. Seconds later, she found her hooves trapped by some green gunk. Struggling did nothing to get free. She let out a couple short breaths while watching some other changelings bring in two more cocoons. These contained Discord, Trixie, and... one that nearly made her throw up. It might have once been a Crystal Guard named Onyx, but his head was missing.

"Do you want to know why I didn't bother capturing and replacing you?" Chrysalis trotted around with a smug grin. "It's because you were worthless. I knew a mere student of a princess couldn't have a shred of hope to stop me. Nobody's left to save you. It was just your little squad, and now it's just you."

Starlight grunted before putting on a brave smile. "Thorax is still out there. He can find a way."

"Don't you ever mention that traitor's name in my presence!" Chrysalis's mood soured immediately. "He was a fool to leave and an even bigger fool to return!" She sulked and trotted between a couple of her subjects. "When I get my hooves on him, I'll give him a traitor's punishment."

"Oh, so now he's worth your notice?!" Starlight's eyes glinted violet.

Chrysalis spun on her hind hooves. "I take it back. It seems I'll need to deliver punishment for two betrayals!"

She shot out a ray of green magic. Pharynx yelled out as his disguise was ripped away. Small trails of smoke funneled out of a few of his holes. He grit his fangs and growled at his former queen. She went back to her confident smile.

"Well, well, well." Chrysalis purred mockingly. "Are you finally here for your debriefing, Pharynx?" She spat at him, getting it all over his right eyelid. "You're only an invasion too late. Capturing Shining Armor and Mi Amore Cadenza would have gone more smoothly had you simply followed your duty, like a good little drone!"

Pharynx shook his head. "What good's a queen if she stops giving a chitin about her own subjects?"

"And what would you know about caring about the changelings?!" Chrysalis snarled. "You abandoned command of my armies just to... fraternize with the enemy!"

"At least my brother aimed to find another way to survive that wouldn't jeopardize the quality of our food in the future." Pharynx stared indignantly. "Did you forget how short the preservation time is for marinating ponies? And how their ability to love runs out faster in the cocoons than letting them live and love naturally?"

"Shut your mouth, you treacherous silkworm!"

Chrysalis slapped his cheek. All of the standard changelings in the chamber visibly flinched and took a step back. Despite his shell already being black, the dark bruise mark showed on Pharynx's face immediately. He spat out to the floor. Some lighter green, thick blood joined the drop of saliva.

"You have no right to talk to me that way!" Chrysalis's horn looked like it was burning. "You don't matter! None of you matter! The only way this hive survives is if I'm in charge!"

Pharynx coughed, yet he managed to chuckle. "Sure, Your Violence. Dig that hole deeper, why don't you?"

"I gave you an order to shut your mouth!" Chrysalis slapped his opposite cheek.

Despite a second bruise, he still smiled. "Hey, if I'm getting punished anyway, the least I can do is make sure you don't get to enjoy it."

"M-Mommy?" A small, voice cut through the tension.

Every changeling looked over at the source. It was a small changeling, looking barely older than a first molter. She had an identical blue eye-color of Chrysalis.

"Is that true what you said?" The small changeling shook. "That... none of us matter?"

"Can we talk about this later, Ocellus?" Chrysalis rubbed a growing migraine. "Your Queen is busy right now."

"But if none of us matter, then..." Ocellus shook in place. "All that stuff you said about me taking your place one day, all of those life lessons... It was all a lie?"

"Heh, hallelujah." Pharynx breathed unsteadily. "With a smart daughter like that, there's hope yet."

"You don't deserve to hope!" Chrysalis shouted while shooting a beam at him.

He cried out as his exoskeleton burned in pain. More smoke trails funneled from the rest of his body's holes. He would've collapsed to his knees, had the goop not forced his legs to stay mostly straight.

*Tink!* *Tink!* *Tink!*

A chipping noise caught Chrysalis's attention and she turned her facial wrath at the perpetrator. Starlight and Thorax were busy trying to attack the base of the throne seat. Thorax was levitating stalactites at the darn thing. Without her magic, Starlight was forced to hit it slowly with a rock in her hooves. They stopped and slowly turned their attention to the queen that was glaring at them. Chrysalis hissed and flew toward her throne.

"Uh-oh..." Starlight chucked her rock to one side and jumped out of the way.

Thorax spun his held stalactites around and launched them at Chrysalis. She fired three consecutive blasts and turned all of the pointy rocks into rubble. He flew around to Starlight's hiding place, and Chrysalis was fast on his tail.

"Hah!" Chrysalis forced herself to laugh. "What were you hoping to achieve? Nothing can break my throne and you're never getting the magic you need to fight me! Give up now and I can promise you a swift end."

"Just like you promised to give the hive's rule to your daughter?" Thorax countered. "I don't think so!"

Chrysalis punched the rocky surface closest to Thorax's head. "You're as pathetic an excuse of a changeling as your brother!" She turned around to look at the other changelings in the room. "What are you waiting for, you fools! Get them!"

For the first time in her rule, several changelings hesitated on the spot. They looked at each other with uncertain expressions. There was some quiet chatter mixed with bug noises. Chrysalis's head threatened to turn red and steam erupted from her horn.

"It seems you've spent so much time ruling with the stick." Hoof steps accompanied a familiar mare's voice. "But in doing so, you've worn it down to a splinter."

Chrysalis growled. "You..."

Princess Cadance gave the stare of a disappointed mother. "Chrysalis, let your prisoners go. Then, we can calmly discuss our kingdoms' relations moving forward."

Author's Note

Yeah, you already know Chrysalis isn't going to give up that easily. Right?

Ch. 7: Last Warning

Chrysalis was many things. She was an egg-hatcher, a manipulator, a deceiver, and a power-hungry creature. Negotiable was never one of them. At Cadance's statement, the changeling queen laughed loudly. She slowly looked up and her neck released a cracking noise every half-second. There was a pause. Then, she looked at her uninvited guest with cold eyes.

"You're in no position to demand anything, Princess." Chrysalis's wings flared. "You barge into my hive, slaughter my subjects, and you have the gall to tell me what my rights are?"

"Your Majesty," interrupted a soldier drone. "We kind of did that stuff to them too."

"Don't interrupt me!"

Chrysalis blasted the soldier away with a sporadic ray of magic. The soldier inhaled sharply before his body turned to ashes. His helmet clanged against the ground. The rest of the changelings present let out a screech in fear. The exceptions were Thorax, who was still hiding with Starlight, and Pharynx, who was still feeling burning pains from his earlier punishment.

"Anyway, you're far from home, Pony!" Chrysalis stomped the ground. "In my domain, you have no power! You have no magic! You have nothing to bargain with that I cannot simply take for myself!" She channeled a green light to her horn. "Unless your last words are, 'I surrender and you are the superior leader of Equestria,' I don't want to hear anything you say."

"Mommy?" Ocellus shakily raised a hoof. "Permission to say something?"

"Oh, for Fae's sake, what?!" Chrysalis stared metaphorical daggers at her 'daughter'.

The little changeling shook but managed to take a few steps forward. She cleared her throat and pulled out a small, greenish orb. "I, Princess Ocellus of the changeling pack, hereby and forevermore recognize Princess Mi Amore Cadenza of the Crystal Empire, an honorary guest." She tapped the orb against the alicorn's left wing.

When Cadance had first entered the changeling territory, she had felt severely dampened. Her magic was there, she just couldn't bring it out without it slipping away to the absorption throne. But the moment the orb touched her wing, her emptiness left and every one of her limbs felt full of life.

Chrysalis gasped and launched a beam. "No!"

Cadance closed her eyes and lifted her hoof. At the same time, her horn lit up and a transparent, sky blue field appeared in front of her. The queen's spell bounced around the shield and dissolved. Cadance blinked twice and looked over at Ocellus.

"You may cast your magic at will." Ocellus smiled gently.

The little changeling was suddenly lifted up by a sickly green aura. Chrysalis willed Ocellus to float eye-to-eye. Ocellus gulped. Chrysalis growled before tossing the small changeling away like a rag doll. Cadance spread her wings and soared. Chrysalis mirrored the princess's flight path.

Zigzagging beams of green and focused spirals of light blue filled the throne room. Most of Chrysalis's changeling drones scurried away to avoid getting zapped. Meanwhile, Thorax ran over to his brother's side. Starlight galloped over to check on Ocellus. There was a sound imitating two buzz saws as Cadance and Chrysalis crossed horns in the air.

An explosion of blue and green lights forced both royals to the ground. Chrysalis was huffing for breath. Cadance stared at her, preparing for anything.

"I've had enough of you!" Chrysalis shouted. "I was going to lock you up in a nice cocoon with forcibly sweet dreams, but forget it! You'll never see the light of another day!"

Starlight muttered while helping Ocellus onto her hooves. "Pretty sure that's Nightmare Moon's line."

Chrysalis either didn't hear or didn't care. Sparks of black and green were flashing out of her horn with little focus. She fired as many of those as she could straight in front of her. Cadance grit her teeth and cast a wide ray of light blue magic. It looked like the spells were fighting for space... and the green static was gaining ground.

Cadance grunted. "Chrysalis! Don't push anymore! If you do, it'll mean death!"

Chrysalis hissed as she continued to cast. "You think I care? I've already made peace with you dying!"

Cadance held a hoof to her chest and calmly exhaled. She opened her eyes fully. "Aloha Amore."

Her teacher's clamp made itself visible on her horn. It was just long enough for the shackle to crack and dissolve into the aether. Her current spell resembled a faucet being turned to full blast. Her eyes turned white as the magic rushed forth, destroying all of the green and black bolts in its way.

"What? That's impossi-" Chrysalis's whole world turned white.

An explosion of white and blue appeared near the top of the hive mountain. All of the changelings and ponies out front paused to look at the damage. The changelings turned around flew inside base. Shining Armor felt a spark return to his whole body. He shot up a beacon spell that popped in the shape of his shield cutie mark. He gave the order to give chase to the fleeing changelings and what was left of his army galloped inside.

Where there once stood an imposing stone throne, now there was a giant hole in the wall. Some shards of red and blue crystals were scattered along the circumference. The changeling drones that had been present in the chamber slowly crawled out from their hiding spaces and looked in awe. Cadance's eyes returned to their normal color. Her opponent was no more. In the queen's place stood a giant valentine statue made of several different crystals.

"You've made your bed, Chrysalis." Cadance stared at the heart. "Rest in peace."

Vibrations from the fight had dislodged the cocoons from the ceiling. Celestia, Luna, Discord, Trixie, and the encased crystal ponies that still drew breath pulled themselves out of the gunk. When the ponies saw the broken cocoons with corpse remains of Onyx and the others, they lowered their heads in grief.

The changelings marched around the Crystal Princess. The other ponies readied actions for spells. But when the changelings took deep bows, the casters quickly halted.

"The hive surrenders, Princess Cadance." One changeling soldier took off his helmet and laid it at her hooves.

By this time, Shining Armor's force had made it up to the throne room. When he saw his wife glance at him with a knowing smile, he equipped his spear back to his belt. The guards took the hint and disarmed as well. Celestia finally raised the sun to where it was supposed to be at the midday hour.

"Pharynx, wake up!" Thorax's voice broke the silence. "We won."

Attention was turned by all occupants to the reformed changelings. Thorax had managed to pull his brother out of the goop, but he wasn't responding. Ocellus scurried over and placed her ear near Pharynx's chest. She frowned. She stepped back and slowly shook her head.

"Chrysalis's fires must have cooked his lungs." She gave look of sorrow to the younger brother. "He doesn't have long."

"No..." Thorax's eyes watered. "This isn't right. Pharynx, please. I need you! Stay with us and help us!"

Trixie glanced at the currently slimy draconequus. "Hey, can't you mess around with your powers now?"

"Oh, I can make a mess of many things!" Discord stated proudly before crossing his arms. "The Reaper's Scythe is not one of them."

"Maybe I can try necromancy," Starlight suggested.

"Absolutely not!" Luna shot her a death glare.

Celestia shook her head. "A shambling ghoul would not replace the love that was lost in life."

"Oh, right..." Starlight scratched her mane. "I forgot about the 'needs to feed on brains' part of the necromancer ritual. My bad."

Discord looked around the room. "Not to diminish the lives that were lost today, but where's Fluttershy?"

Almost every occupant stared at him with wide-eyes. The ponies looked around, seeing no sign of Fluttershy. For that matter, the other Bearers of Harmony weren't present either. One of the drone changelings piped up.

"C-Can I speak without getting vaporized?" She asked.

"That depends..." Discord's eyes glowed red.

"Discord! / Discord! / Discord!" Cadance, Starlight, and Trixie called him out at once.

"Oh, fine." Discord stuck his tongue out at the ponies before returning his attention to the changeling drone. "I won't vaporize you for talking. I might still glare at you angrily while wagging my claw at you."

"Uh... okay." The drone twiddled her hooves. "The recon force in Ponyville stated that they were bringing the Bearers of Harmony and their pet dragon very soon. But they still haven't shown up."

Pharynx coughed. "C-Cantrip..."

"Pharynx!" Thorax exclaimed and wrapped his front hooves around him.

Pharynx weakly pushed against him. "Just listen for a sec. Cantrip was the squad leader in Ponyville. She claimed she was going to make that group kings and queens in their own right." He breathed shakily. "She... really did... betray the hive... for her own greed." His eyes darted to the ponies in the room. "Get to Ponyville. Find... Cantrip..."

The reformed, violet wings glinted one more time before going limp. The light left his eyes, leaving dull purple orbs. Thorax shook while hugging his brother tightly. The world gave him someone close to him, that had something in common with him... and it took him away. He cried out in anguish.

Author's Note

We're way off script now.

Ch. 8: Wilds Beat Kings And Queens

Author's Note

Experiment: How does an author continue their story when the main character is no longer there?

Answer: Poorly, especially if it isn't Hamlet or Les Miserables quality.

If you've made it this far, thank you for taking the time to read. I wasn't always sure how this was going to develop. Please make sure to take care of yourself, whatever you're going through.

Ch. 8: Wilds Beat Kings And Queens

She went through a haze. It was difficult for her to concentrate on anything. What was her name? For some reason, a bowl of Pho briefly crossed her mind. But she slowly shook it off. Maybe it didn't matter.

What was she? It was a strange question to cross her cloud of thoughts. There were holes that went through her hands? Hooves? It was so hard to focus. Both couldn't be right, yet she couldn't decide which was actually right.

She went her entire life as an only child. No, wait... that wasn't entirely true. She had a little brother. How was he doing? The bigger guys shouldn't be messing with him, if they didn't want to face her rage.

Briefly, it crossed her mind that she could have died. How exactly did she die? The hive fell off a bridge. No, her bus caught fire. No, she wasn't ready for release yet! She needed to stop Cantrip! ... Cantrip? What was that? Some kind of weird name for a fantasy power?

She was too tired to keep her thoughts together. She wanted to rest.

In the place between long teleports, Luna's hoof went to her head. "The dead do not have dreams. How is that possible?"

"Luna, what's wrong?" Celestia held out a wing.

"All physical signs showed that the changeling known as Pharynx has passed on." Luna scrunched her brow. "Yet, I was able to access his dreams as any other living sleeper. This makes little sense."

Celestia looked toward the exit point. "We can speak more of this later. We are approaching Twilight's castle now."

A force of multiple ponies, a draconequus, and a select few changelings appeared in a flash. They landed right on the doorstep of the Castle of Friendship. Out of habit, Starlight trotted up to the front door and tried to open it. It didn't budge to her magical pull. She tried the door-knocker.

A small slot opened near the center of the door. "What do you w-" The fake dragon's eyes opened wide at the sight of the literal army at the door. "Uh... um... No solicitors!" He slammed the slot closed. Through the door, his voice could be heard, shouting, "Pony princesses at the door!"

"I don't have time for this." Discord sulked and snapped his claws.

The big door got up on two chaos-crafted legs and stepped out of the way. Discord launched out his paw like it was rubber, snatched up the fleeing fake dragon, and pulled it close.

"Where's Fluttershy?" Discord hissed with fire coming out of his ears.

"F-Fluttershy?" The fake dragon surrounded himself in green fire to resemble the light yellow pegasus with a pink mane. "Y-You mean some pony that looks like this?" Then, it shape-shifted back into its dragon disguise. "Never met her!"

"Then you're useless." Discord opened his mouth as big as a blue whale, armed with several rows of mismatched fangs and chompers.

Fake Spike yelled in fear and covered his eyes. "The ponies we captured are in the basement with the spiders and centipedes so that curious ponies would be put off and not go looking for them! Please let me go!"

"There." Discord patted the area under the fake dragon's tail. "Was that so difficult?" He tossed the changeling behind him.

It landed on the grass and shifted back to its standard drone shape. The changeling curled up into a fetal position and shivered. Shining Armor and his guards went to work scavenging every room, checking for potential changeling traps. The changelings that had volunteered to come with them checked the ceilings.

Now that there was an idea of where she needed to go, Starlight was able to activate her teleport directly into the basement. Sure enough, several spiderwebs and centipedes marked the way. Celestia flashed a ray of sunlight into the dark halls, convincing the arachnids and the multi-legs to crawl away in fright.

Luna cast some dancing lights to follow the team around. It helped those without night-vision to see in the dark corners that weren't already lit. Unicorn horns fizzled out when they rounded a corner. Seven cocoons were trapped to the ceiling. What stood in the way was a little unnerving.

Six sets of colored eyes glowed in the darkness. Thorax cast a glow to his horn and wings to light up the basement room. The giggling was coming from six changelings. Every single one of them looked large enough to have Chrysalis proportions. Each of these royal changelings was holding a glowing stone, which looked identical in color to Chrysalis's throne.

"Cantrip!" Thorax called out.

"Well, if it isn't the little doll-player." Cantrip chuckled. "You may have brought help in the form of pony princesses. But now, their magic is completely useless. Can you beat six hive royals all by yourself?"

"Funny thing about making friends." Thorax smirked. "I'm never by myself." He motioned behind himself.

Cadance's horn lit up. She magically pulled all six of the absorption stones to the room's center. Then, she trapped the spheres in a giant, blue crystal. Another cast crushed the crystal and its contents.

"That's not possible!" Cantrip exclaimed. "How can a pony use magic against something that pony magic doesn't work against?"

"Your hive's princess was kind enough to gift me a guest pass." Cadance brimmed with confidence.

The other ponies readied action spells and their horns lit up. Discord surrounded his upper limbs with a red aura, just for kicks.

"Ocellus..." Cantrip hissed. "Well, it doesn't matter! We've been gathering love from Ponyville's residents long before Chrysalis started her invasion plan properly. We're invincible changeling kings and queens!"

Thorax looked at Cadance with gratitude. "Thank you for defeating Chrysalis. But I think Discord and I have some steam to uncover. Mind taking a breather?"

Cadance blinked twice. "Are you sure?"

"I've seen enough badassery from you to last a lifetime." Thorax smiled. His wings glinted teal, violet, and back to teal. "Alright, Klutzy Draconequus. You take the three royals on the right. I'll take the three royals on the left."

"Oh, feathers to that!" Discord cracked his knuckles. "I'm taking five of them!"

Thorax tilted his head, then shrugged. "Have it your way."

The atrocities inflicted by the draconequus upon his victims were not suitable for a written record. Meanwhile, the reformed changeling was facing off with Cantrip herself. She seemed completely unmoved by what happened to her colleagues. Thorax covered himself in battering fire and flew toward the last enemy. Cantrip smiled crookedly and lit up her horn. Her aura surrounded Thorax and smothered his fiery attack.

She magically tossed him against a sidewall, the floor, and then the ceiling. Conveniently, the impact knocked one of the cocoons loose. Discord caught the cocoon, squeezed tight, and popped it open. A drowsy Fluttershy suddenly found a familiar set of limbs hugging her. She coughed up some of the green gunk from the cocoon.

Thorax took a moment to shape-shift. A paper plane zipped through the air. Cantrip tried magically grabbing the tiny aircraft, but she kept hitting random spots in the architecture instead. Once the paper plane got right in front of the royal's face, Thorax shifted back to his default to perform a back-flip kick.

Celestia, Luna, and Starlight went to work freeing the rest of the ponies and Spike from their respective cocoons. While they were doing that, Cantrip started spraying spells wildly in an attempt to catch Thorax. Cadance threw a shield spell like a net to keep the stray blasts off the rest of the basement's current visitors.

"What's... going on?" Twilight Sparkle rubbed her head and some goo off.

"You remember Spike's changeling friend Thorax?" Starlight pointed over at the fight going on. "Well, he's currently battling the last big, bad changeling. The rest have either surrendered or turned a new leaf."

"Or have been squashed," added Trixie.

Starlight sighed. "Right, some were squashed."

Thorax was zipping around his enemy's spells. A stray thought went to a time when he was barely older than a hatchling. His brother had taken a habit of grabbing Thorax's hoof and slapping it against his face. Back in the present, he got an idea and looped around. He landed all four hooves on Cantrip's back.

"What the-? Get off!"

She swung at him with her hoof. Thorax jumped off just in time to watch her break one of her own wings. She hissed in pain.

"Why are you hitting yourself?" Thorax grinned as he zipped under the royal's abdomen.

Cantrip magically grabbed a stone shard and launched it toward her foe. He crawled around, dodging the shard, leaving it to jam right through the royal's shell at her belly. She cried out at the impact.

"Why are you hitting yourself?" Thorax spun around and kicked against the wannabe queen's horn.

Cantrip fell to her knees, trying and failing to grab her sources of pain. Thorax flew off and stood in front of his friends and allies. The remaining royal changeling heaved for breath, taking shaky steps forward. After about five steps, her eyes rolled back and she collapsed on her side.

"Meh." Discord jiggled his wrist. "That kind of beat down was too good for her."

Spike ran over to Thorax. "Are... you okay?"

Thorax hugged the young dragon. "That's my line." He shook and wept. "And no, I'm not."

The next few days were a bit more hectic with a bit less action. Paperwork had stacked up and cases needed to be filed. Some bills needed to be backtracked since they had been signed by fake princesses instead of the real deal. The changeling hive's population had to collectively come to terms that their hunting and stealing days were over. While some agreed to reform and figured out how to share their love, others were more hesitant and decided to go hungry in silence.

Chrysalis had been defeated and Cantrip had been sentenced to Tartarus imprisonment. As for who would lead the hive now, provisions were made to establish a co-rule between Princess Ocellus and Thorax as the provisional king. There were still some wrinkles to iron out, but those would come in due time.

As the sun set one evening, Thorax sat in front of a flat piece of stone. It marked where Pharynx's remains had been buried. He didn't understand why someone had left flowers. He really didn't understand why they had left them in a bouquet with plastic wrap. It seemed like such a waste, almost disrespectful. Yet, all he could do in retaliation was sigh for the umpteenth time.

"How long are you going to mope around, Little Brother?"

"I don't know," admitted Thorax. "The pony books regarding funerals and grieving didn't specify a right time."

Purple eyes rolled. "You can't keep blaming yourself. Chrysalis is the one who fried me, not you."

Thorax tapped his hoof against his cheek. "And I wasn't strong enough to stop her."

"Thorax, for real. Stop hitting yourself. You're part of the leadership for the future of changeling-kind."

Thorax buried his face into the cloak he brought with him. "What good is a king if he can't keep watch over his subjects?"

"You care enough to try. That's a billion times better than what the hive had before you came along." A flower petal went between fangs. "Blegh... daffodils. How do ponies stomach these things?" There was a cough. "Look, maybe I'm not the best creature to say this, but your ability to be kind and genuinely listen are your best strengths. If you don't trust yourself, then at least believe in what I'm telling you."

"You always knew better." Thorax smiled sadly. "Even if you didn't always have the best tact."

"Yeah, I'm kind of a jerk. But that's why it has to be you. You can be the leader. You can be the example others strive for."

Thorax sniffed and wiped his face. After adjusting his cloak, he stood up and turned around. "Thank you, Pharynx. I should get going."

"I'll be here feeding my pet worms." Pharynx saluted.

Thorax chuckled but stopped himself. He looked back at the grave. As long as he remembered, his big brother would never truly die. After taking a deep breath and exhaling, Thorax began the flight back home.