Taming The Past

Maud silently stood, walking toward the kitchen while Twilight took a moment to cry. After a minute or two, she returned with a soothing cup of tea, for Twilight’s nerves. She walked past the couch, placing the drink upon her hand. Without checking to observe it, Twilight took a sip and brushed her hair back. But even as the soothing warm chamomile trickled down her throat, the tears didn’t stop.

“Thank you…” Twilight replied, quietly.

Twilight took another sip, as Maud returns to her seat allowing her all the space she needs. The others sat dumbfounded, uncertain whether or not to speak.

“I don’t know what to do here,” Pinkie whispered to Rainbow Dash. “I don’t want to just sit here, watching my friend with a frowny pouty face. She shouldn’t feel she should continue, but we can’t just tell her to stop.”

“I feel lost too,” Rainbow Dash whispered back. “I have no idea what to do in this situation.”

Suffice to say, the two were awful when it comes to whispering. Twilight Sparkle could practically hear every word from their ‘hushed’ conversation. It wasn’t hard for her to hear them, but at least they cared. They were good girls, what more could Twilight ever ask for.

“The tea will calm her nerves,” Maud said.

“Girls… It’s okay, really,” Twilight assured, choking her words. “It’s just… Nobody ever asked me about my… Childhood before. I never had a reason to talk about it, so I just… I tried not to think about it… That way it doesn’t bother me as much.”

“What about your parents?” Rainbow Dash asked. “Did they ever know how you felt about going to Crystal Prep? Did they even care?”

“No, th—” Twilight choked her words. “I know they love me, but… I was scared if I stopped excelling at any time. But before I tell you ‘that’ story… C-Can I finish with high school?”

Everyone felt a tad uncomfortable, fearing it would leave Twilight devastated. But not to hurt her feelings anymore and considering how far along she’s come; it would be wiser to let her finish. After all, saying ‘no’ at this point would make her feel unappreciative.

“Umm… S-Sure,” Pinkie spoke, uncertainly. “If it helps.”

Twilight actually forced a smile across her tear-stained face, all while sipping the tea Maud made. The drink did more than enough to help her, as she felt calmer and relaxed. A sigh escapes her lips as she goes back in time to her youth.

<>

Dinner time, after school. The part of the day where Twilight would be with her parents and sometimes her older brother, a Crystal Prep alumnus, whenever he’d come to visit. But for this occasion, they decided to go out to eat at one of the best restaurants in town, though Twilight didn’t remember the name. They were all discussing Twilight’s possible enrollment to Crystal Prep which her brother, Shining Armor by name, attended. They were very ecstatic for Twilight, who suffice to say didn’t share the same sentiment.

“I told my parents of my accomplishments and all the big places I was going to. Between myself, the news, the food, and my family, they were very happy for me, they laughed together, praised me. They often told me ‘You’re a great kid, we always knew you’re destined for greatness’. I don’t hate my parents, quite the opposite. It’s just hard to have an emotional connection when all they talk about is having a genius for a daughter.”

<>

The scene eventually switched to the front of Crystal Prep, where Twilight Sparkle stood in a déjà vu moment. This was supposed to be the most prestigious high school in the entire county, reserved only for the most promising students. And sure enough, Twilight Sparkle was one of them.

“I ended up accepting the offer and began my freshman year at Crystal Prep when I was nine.”

<>

After telling that part, Twilight slightly smiled, as if she had just moved on from her breakdown a while ago.

“Granted, I was in Crystal Prep longer than any other school,” Twilight continued. “But mostly because I took the more advanced classes earlier on. At a total of six classes per year, and high school lasting four, how many is that?”

“Uh… 22?” Rainbow Dash answered first.

“Is it 26?”

Twilight chuckled, shaking her head. As bad these guesses were, she needed a laugh.

“24,” Maud said, simply.

“Correct,” Twilight nodded. “Granted, I could have just taken the basic classes, but I worried they wouldn’t amount to whatever bar I set myself for my parents. The truth is: I only took the advanced classes assuming my parents figured I ‘should’. They always believed in me, they did say I did not ‘have’ to if I didn’t desire it, but I thought those were just their way of saying, ‘We want you to’.”

In that instance, Twilight Sparkle noticed Rainbow Dash’s body language communicate ‘sympathy’ and the former immediately felt guilty. The moment Rainbow caught Twilight looking at her, she turned away as if to drown herself in whatever shame she had. But Twilight noticed her looking out the window, noticing the sun going down. Night was coming fast, almost too soon.

“Wow, have I been talking that long?” Twilight replied. “I feel bad for taking up your entire afternoon.”

“Oh no, no, no!” Pinkie objected, waving her hands. “Please continue.

“Well, okay… Just stop me if it gets annoying, okay?”

Twilight Sparkle paused a moment, taking a deep breath, before proceeding.

“What my middle school counselors told me was a gargantuan lie,” Twilight spoke. “Whatever maturity they claimed Crystal Prep had in their students, they weren’t present. Turned out, the things they do to me was far worse, verbally and physically.”

<>

Twilight Sparkle walks down the halls of the pristine private school that is Crystal Prep, passing by all the students. She could blend in with these kids, all dressed in the school’s uniform as part of a strict dress code they followed. But she never truly fit in: She would hear what they say about her on the way to class or sometimes they’d just ignore her completely. Twilight felt alone in a world she was brought up to fit in.

“The torment began the first week I was there,” Twilight started, teary and upset. “I-I was bullied daily, whether for my size or my age. They’d take my s-suplies from me most days of the week and the girls would mock me all the time. This one student, Sugarcoat, sometimes I feel she really hates me. Everyday, they’d steal my notes and toss them to each other like a game of ‘Monkey in the Middle’. As if that wasn’t enough, they throw it in the garbage can and leaving me to dig them out for myself.”

<>

“That’s terrible!” Rainbow Dash replied.

“And it only gets worse…” Twilight said, sniffling.

<>

Twilight found herself climbing out of the giant dumpster digging for her notebook and all her important notes. By the time she emerged, she heard chuckling from the sides noticing that her actions had granted her an audience in the worst way. All the other students, especially the girls, were all laughing at her some mouthing ‘Garbage Girl’. Twilight just sighed, as a tear slowly slipped down her eye.

“None of those students ever wanted to be my friends. They’d say I wasn’t ‘cool’ to be around them, that I should ‘go back to playing with dollies’ or ‘have tea with my imaginary friends’. Well, at least my imaginary friends are more civil than those jerks. Everyday, I try to shrug it off, hiding all the pain inside. But it got so bad, one time I actually got into a fight with that kid.”

<>

“No way, Sci-Twi!” Pinkie gasped, in disbelief. “I can’t see you actually hurting anyone.”

Twilight practically shivered as she turned to her friend. The words she said were painful and it’s true Twilight would never hurt ‘anyone’. But what they didn’t know… It did happen.

“It wasn’t an intentional ‘fight’, but yes someone did get hurt…”

<>

Sophomore year, Twilight was just going down the halls minding her own business. When there was this girl who ran right into Twilight and apparently, Twilight had spilt the girl’s coffee from her hand and onto her uniform. The look on that girl’s face said it all: She was furious.

“I was a sophomore when it happened. I was just turning a corner walking to my fourth class when this one girl, Lollipop, one of the meanest girls in school, dashed from the other side and crashed into me. She had coffee in her hand and, apparently, my collision with her dumped the hot beverage onto her skin and uniform. I followed her toward the water fountain, intending to apologize, but she was boiling in anger.”

Lollipop, knowing the stain would not come off no matter how hard she scrubbed her dress with the water, confronted Twilight Sparkle. She began yelling at her, viciously pushing a finger to her chest. Twilight tried so hard to apologize, but it was all fruitless. She loomed over the frightened Twilight Sparkle, raising her fist slowly.

“She started complaining about how I ruined her uniform, never mind the fact her reckless dashing caused the accident. I tried to reason with her, but she wouldn’t reason. She just walked toward me slowly, her looming over me by a foot and a half while I was only four feet and seven inches. And then… She sucked punched me in the face!”

<>

The memory ends as Twilight Sparkle clutched the side of her right cheek, as if she could still feel where that fist made contact. It was only later she realized Twilight had been shouting, with Pinkie reaching towards Maud for a pillow to lean against. When she couldn’t reach it, Maud, not breaking her stare towards Twilight, handed the pillow to Pinkie, who clutched the pillow tightly against her chest. And Rainbow Dash, in that rare instance seemingly out of character, she was speechless.

“I ended up with a black eye because of her,” Twilight spoke. “But I told the nurse I tripped and slammed my face onto the flagpole. I don’t know if she actually believed it, but I don’t recall her ever questioning it. Not one student or teach called my bluff, not even the kids who witnessed it. I suppose I chose not to say anything fearing Lollipop would try to hurt me again or her friends would do it. As if I wasn’t already hated enough.”

“What about your parents and your brother?” Rainbow Dash asked. “What did they say?”

“I never told my parents, not even my brother,” Twilight sighed, shamefully. “I only gave Shining the same lame story. I just didn’t want them to be so disappointed in me, that they’d drag me out of that school for that.”

The others were confused as to how their one friend could say such talk. But as Twilight continued to speak, her voice only got sadder with each passing second.

“I was in that school for three years, though I could’ve graduated much sooner. I completed all the basic classes, more than enough AP substitutes for a diploma. But I stayed longer because I wanted the time to do the college level classes, knowing I’d attend college no matter how long I was at that school. On one hand, I’d be saving money and-and… By the time I was ready, I’d go to college as an adult.”

“Wait… Is that the reason you didn’t go off to college proper?” Rainbow Dash spoke up. “I’m sorry, but I feel like there’s more to it than that.

Twilight Sparkle looked toward the trio, sighing.

“No, you’re right… That wasn’t exactly the ‘only’ reason. I believe I decided to stay in Crystal Prep longer and not rushing to college because… For the first time: I felt that it wasn’t best for me.”