Taming The Past

“So… I understand you decided to transfer to our school because Crystal Prep is awful, I get that,” Rainbow Dash spoke. “But still, when you’ve finally had enough of high school, what will you do after graduation?”

Twilight Sparkle didn’t quite answer right away, she just brushed a finger in circles through the empty teacup. But still, she knew that question would come up eventually.

“Well, I know I’ll still be much younger than the other students at college,” Twilight explained. “Which makes it worse because college students are older; I’d still stick out like a sore thumb. I imagine all the discrimination against me can only get worse from there… I don’t know. I always believed students in college are more mature, but then I felt the same about Crystal Prep… And we all know how that turned out.”

“As far as what I would do after graduation? I guess what I really want is to get out of the system, after being abused for so long. But what scares me most is the idea of staying in college for six years or more, graduating at fifteen, and with all the child labor laws, I doubt I’d ever get a job anywhere.”

Suddenly, it was then Twilight’s eyes opened widely. As if she had an epiphany, a sudden realization of great truth sparking her mind.

“You know what I just realized: I’ve spent my entire childhood trying to make everyone happy. My parents, my brother, my teachers… But what about me? I never gave myself permission to be just a kid; I never even bothered to make any true friends! I’ve just been so busy trying to impress my superiors, I never realized until now – I wasn’t caring for myself!”

That moment of truth made the poor girl bury her face in her arms, bawling her eyes out unable to contain her sadness. Rainbow Dash just looked at her friend with both concern and confusion.

“I… I don’t understand,” Rainbow spoke. “I’ve always assumed you enjoyed being in school, even though I could never understand why.”

It took a moment for Twilight Sparkle to properly respond, trying to choke her own tears. There was no mistake: Twilight Sparkle was a total mess… More like an awkward loser with no friends. For years, that’s how Twilight always looked at herself, but no one ever called on her to speak about it. She didn’t want this night to end with a pity party, not in front of among the few friends she ever made.

“D-D-Don’t get me wrong…” Twilight answered, stuttering. “I… I love learning. I love my books, I love the math, English, everything. It just would’ve been nice to just be a kid, to have friends… Like you girls did. Kids should be able to have fun, not stressed over being an adult. Kids are meant to be kids… The last thing they should worry about is college…”

All at once, before Twilight could continue, Pinkie jumped onto her, hugging her tightly.

“Aw, Twily… I’m sorry you had such a rotten childhood…”

And as Pinkie raised Twilight’s head, she could see her friend was pouring tears. Still, Pinkie Pie pressed on.

“But look at you now: You aren’t alone anymore! You have friends now! You have Maud, you have Dashi, but most of all… You have me! There’s Fluttershy, Applejack, Sunset, and that’s just off the top of my head!”

The last thing Twilight Sparkle wanted was to throw a private pity party, but then she saw Rainbow Dash and Maud Pie join in the embrace. It was difficult for her to feel awful, when these girls were giving her all the comfort, of which she hadn’t felt from anyone her age, apart from her brother. But if there’s one other thing she didn’t want: She didn’t want to feel so terrible, that these wonderful girls would suddenly have a different opinion on her.

“Thank you so much, Pinkie…” Twilight smiled, wiping her eyes. “And Maud… Rainbow Dash… You guys are the most amazing friends I could ever ask for! So much more than I…”

There was no mistake: Twilight Sparkle was absolutely beaming. Emotions are funny; one moment she was bawling her eyes out and next thing she’s smiling bigger than she’s ever had before. The girls spent the next few minutes in the most soothing hug they ever had. Eventually, they split off and returned to their seats, sitting quietly for a while.

“So… If you were such a miserable child,” Rainbow spoke, breaking the silence. “Why did you stay anyway? Why not tell your parents you’d rather not be there? Why torture yourself?”

“You mean… Should I have dropped out?” Twilight responded.

“No, I’m just referring to those earlier years you mentioned. You didn’t have to take those college classes if you didn’t want to. You always had a choice.”

“That’s just it. For the longest time, I wanted to say no… But my parents wouldn’t have liked that.”

“How would you know?” Pinkie asked. “Did you even… Talk to them about it?”

There was a long silence in the room, so quiet that the wind outside could be heard brushing against the house. It took a while for Twilight to determine an answer.

“Going to college always seemed to be the plan for me,” Twilight explained. “My parents were always proud of my excellence; they’d praise me on a daily basis. To even tell them I don’t want any of that would only hurt them. I could never do that to them.”

Twilight’s smile was gone by this point. She didn’t want to look in a mirror to see how she looks. But she imagined her emotions were running at light speed by this point. So, without question, any emotion on her face was readable.

“Hey Twilight,” Pinkie spoke up. “It’s okay, really it is.”

Leave it to Pinkie Pie making the effort to turn that frown upside down. But Pinkie Pie was determined to get through to Twilight at all costs.

“Your parents would never be disappointed in you; they love you very much. They were happy for you because they were proud of you, not because they wanted you to do anything. Your parents never wanted what was best for them, they only wanted what was best for ‘you’. If you don’t want to be in college, not right now, I’m sure they’ll understand.”

Twilight Sparkle wiped the tears from her face, shrinking her frown slightly.

“You… Y-You really… Think so?”

“Pinkie’s not wrong when it comes to family,” Maud replied.

“Every parent wants what’s best for their kids,” Rainbow added. “I’m not one to talk, but I do ‘feel’ that’s what they would do. Family’s about supporting each other and I’m pretty sure that’s what your parents were doing. Supporting you, not encouraging you.”

“Dashie’s right,” Pinkie came in. “If you’d rather be a normal child, not some prodigy, go ahead. You don’t have to be anything that makes you uncomfortable, no matter what others think. The only real opinion that matters is yours.”

Pinkie hopped off the catch, walking towards Twilight Sparkle with Maud following close behind.

“We are proud of you, no matter what,” Maud says, then added. “Is what your parents would say.”

Rainbow Dash turned toward one of the windows, noticing there wasn’t much daylight left. For a moment, she seemed concerned over whether it would be safe for anyone to walk home at this hour. And yet, Rainbow Dash actually chuckled at the thought.

“What’s so funny?” Twilight asked, almost snappy.

“Ah, nothing,” Rainbow replied, with a smile. “It’ll be dark soon. Probably should head home.”

Twilight nodded, feeling she may have overstayed her welcome. What was meant to be a casual gathering among friends Twilight felt she made it depressing with her stories. Still, they encouraged her to share those stories and speak her mind over how she felt. And now… Somehow, it was as if Twilight felt a weight slide off her shoulder and it’s in place… She felt confidence. It was in that moment Twilight Sparkle knew what she was going to do:

“I have to talk to my parents… Tonight,” Twilight declared, to herself.

She had just grabbed her homework and made for the door when, all of a sudden, she stopped.

“Oh, wait! I forgot to clean and return my silverware.”

Twilight just took a step toward the kitchen when Rainbow grabbed her shoulder.

“I’ll take care of it,” Rainbow Dash volunteered. “Just promise me you’ll talk to your parents about this deal. Trust me, if they are anything like my parents, they’ll understand… If you just talk to them.”

Twilight Sparkle smiled, nervously at best, but she wanted to show Rainbow that she was right. That everything was going to be okay.

“I promise, Rainbow,” Twilight whispered, turning to the rest. “I’ll talk to my parents tonight.”

“Great!” Pinkie shouted, waving. “See ya later!”

“Bye, Twi!” Rainbow yelled.

Maud said nothing, only nodded with a tiny smile. But if she did have something to say, chances are it be the same thing. Soon enough, Twilight left Sugar Cube Corner behind and made her way for home. Her mind raced as if it ran a thousand kilometers a minute, not certain how she was going to approach her parents over this matter. But she knew this much: Her heart had never felt more confident until tonight.