Blue Acres

Blues lay on his bed, staring at the far wall, as he had been for the last fifteen minutes. Unsurprisingly, it did nothing to help alleviate his boredom, which was getting worse by the minute.

His thoughts drifted towards Big Macintosh; the way the shy stallion reacted to his teasing, the way his fur felt against Blues and that cute farmer accent. Starting a new relationship, if that’s what this was, felt… well, weird was the only word that Blues could use to describe it, but not in a bad way. His relationships were few and far in between and even those rarely got serious. Actually, now that he thought about it, he had only ever been in one serious relationship before.

***

I met him a few years back. Back then I was living in Manehatten and playing a bunch of different gigs with other musicians for bits. On this night I was doing a concert with a popular unicorn DJ in one of the city’s many nightclubs. We wrapped up their set to the sound of applause.

“Considering how slow you were playing, I thought you were going put them to sleep,” commented Scratch.

“Sorry I don’t make up for a lack of talent by just playing really fast that certain unicorns.”

“You call that having talent? I could stick the mouth piece in a donkey’s rear end and make better sounds than you do with it.”

“Big talk from somepony that doesn’t even play a real instrument.”

“I… I…” She quickly turned around and began rubbing the side of her turn table. “Don’t you listen to the mean stallion, Wub Wub, you are a real instrument no matter what others say.”

I did his best to hold in his laughter, I really did, but it was impossible. Scratch soon joined in. “You are so weird at times.”

She pulled me close with and continued her laughter. “And yet you like hanging out with me. Doesn’t that make you weird also?”

“Probably. So, what’re we doing tonight Scratch?”

“Same thing we do every night Blues, try to have as much fun as possible.”

The two of us trotted over to the club’s bar, along the way Scratch thanked Celestia for the idea of club musicians getting free drinks; though how she talked the manager into that idea, I’ll never know. I guess when you become popular as her you get better perks.

“So, any luck in the boyfriend department?” I responded with shake of my head. “You need to get a pair of awesome shades like mine. Guys dig sunglasses.”

“Oh, of course that’s why they flock to you. Has nothing to do with you being a female that known for having lots of sex.”

She scratched the bottom of her chin, thinking it over for a moment. “Nah. It’s the shades. And speaking of guys, there’s one of there with his eyes on you.”

“Like I’m going to fall for that one again,” I said with an eye roll.

“No, I’m serious. Look.” She motioned her head towards the end of the bar. Sure enough, when I looked back there, I spotted a grey unicorn with a short black mane and a pair beautiful, blue eyes looking my way with a smile. “You going to introduce yourself or what?”

“Uh…”

She practically pushed me off the barstool. “I’m tired of you complaining about being single and not getting laid. Go on, get yourself a boyfriend. Oh and see what his policy on threesomes is.”

“Really, Scratch? Really?”

“Hey, it can’t hurt to ask, right?”

With a defeated sigh I marched over the stallion and did my best not to sound like I’d been forced into this conversation. It turned out that his name was Jet Set and he spoke in that typical, upper-class Manehatten accent. Honestly, as soon as I heard his style of speech, I was ready to bail, but then he said something that really caught me off guard.

“That set, I think that’s what you musicians call it, yes, that set of yours sounded similar to Colt-Trane’s music. Though that ending sounded much more like Bleeding Hooves Murphy. Were they inspirations for your music?”

I stood there for a second with my mouth hanging open. “Wow. Yes actually, I’ve been listening to old music of theirs since I was a kid. You really know your jazz.”

“But of course, my good sir. I make it a point to collect music from the very best in all the genres. So, would you care to continue this conversation somewhere more private?”

“Sure,” I said with a shrug of my shoulders. Despite his accent, I figured that this Jet Set guy can’t be all that bad. At the very least I can talk about music with him for a while.

We walked out of the club, and out onto the city’s sidewalks. The cool night air was a nice change to the heat generate by all of those ponies inside. Jet was just finishing up some weird story, “And that’s when he said, that’s not a martini, that’s my wife.”

“Heh, heh, good one Jet.”

Good taste in music: Check. Good taste in humor: Could use improvement.

***

In the following days, I learned that not only did Jet Set talk like the rich ponies in Manehatten, but he also had enough money to put them to shame.

The two of us were in some tailor’s shop. I stared ahead at the three mirrors in front of me, checking out how the suit that I apparently had to have, looked. I moved around a bit and pulled at the collar, trying to get comfortable in the restrictive clothing. It didn’t work.

“Oh would you quit fidgeting.”

“I don’t like these things.”

“Blues, you are a musician, part of your job is to have the right image and wearing a suit while playing the sax just adds so much more to the presentation. Don’t you agree?”

“The music itself is all that matters. Not how I look while playing.”

“So says that pony that always plays second fiddle to others.” I really didn’t want to admit it, but he had a point.

Even though he would nag at times, we were getting along pretty well. He loved to dote on me and give me presents. I was a bit worried that I wast becoming a trophy wife, particularly since I’m a guy, but hey, free stuff. He would even try to use his business connections to get me gigs, ones where I would be the main musician, and not just there to accompany others.

The tailor came around holding a yellow lily, placing it on the front of my suit. “There you go Mister Blues, the final touch. It’s even the same shade as your eyes,” said the tailor.

“Oh, I completely agree, it’s perfect,” said Jet.

You know what? I looked pretty good in a suit. Though I still hate the things. They’re hot, restrictive and simply aren’t worth the effort it takes to keep them clean. However, if you got to wear something you hate, at least make it something that looks good on you.

***

I got the chance to wear my suit the next day on our date at some fancy restaurant. It was one of those places that charged a fortune but yet you barely got any food. I told him that we should have just gotten a pizza or something, but he was insistent on having a dinner date. ‘We should have a real date,’ he said. Things got better afterwards when we found a nice and secluded spot in Central Park to do a little stargazer.

He grew quiet and there seemed to be a bit of a barrier between us. “Something up?” I asked.

“No, no. It’s just that… well; this is actually the first time I have been on a date with another stallion before. I am not entirely sure what I should do next,” he said to the ground, though I think he meant it for me as well.

“Just do what you would with a mare.”

“Very well, but please remember, this was your idea.”

He got closer, until he was right up against me and nuzzled my cheek, ending off with a small kiss on my nose. I’m sure I was probably blushing like some idiot. If Scratch would have seen me, I’d never hear the end of it.

“Did I do something wrong?” he asked, breaking my thought process.

“No. You did everything right.” I leaned over and planted a big kiss on him. His horn suddenly started glowing so I think he liked it or he was surprised or maybe something else. Well, let’s just say that it had some kind of effect.

***

About a week after the date, Jet set me up with a gig. Ok, so technically he was the one hiring me, but it was still a nice sentiment. I was playing for him and a bunch of his rich friends on board a giant airship.

Just as I was finishing up, I spotted a white unicorn stallion surrounded by a flock of starry eyed mares. Jet later on told me that he was some distant relative of the princess. “Now, now ladies, this is why I had my servants make a schedule. There’s only enough of me for two at the time, so the rest of you have to wait your turn.” That voice… that horrible voice. It made Jet’s way of speaking look normal. I wondered if the airship or this so called prince had more hot air in them.

Jet walked up to me, and nuzzled my cheek. “So, the prince has caught your attention? Should I be jealous?”

“Yeah, right. I don’t think I could even get past his groupies.”

“Indeed. They’d tear you to shreds before allowing more competition. Care to come with me back to my cabin? We still have an hour until we dock in Canterlot.”

“Only an hour?”

He led me back to our cabin, making sure to lock the door after we entered. I gently bit his ear and pulled him over the bed, then pushed him onto it. He rolled over to his back and giving me a full look at his body. Jet’s cheeks turned a bit red and he lips curled up into a sheepish little grin. Never one to deny an open invitation, I leapt onto the bed. As I stood over him, I used one hoof to hold him down by the shoulder and leaned down, giving him a love bite on the side of his neck. Oh, and I may have growled a bit while doing it. Or not. I don’t really remember all that happened next.

Afterwards, we laid on the bed for a while. Both of us were still panting a bit, and he had a noticeable mark on his neck. I tapped it with my hoof, “Sorry about that.”

“Don’t be.”

After that night, we started seeing even more of each other… in more than one manner of speaking. It was amazing how his personality would change behind closed doors. He just became so relaxed and he loved to cuddle. I think he may have liked it even more than the sex. I wonder how Macintosh will act once he relaxes around me… if he learns how to relax.

***

Everything was going smoothly as we reached our one month anniversary. He took me to a little cabin he owned, along the outskirts of White Tail Woods. Jet said he loved going there whenever he wanted to get away from the world, and I could understand why, particularly in winter. All the animals were hibernating and the air outside was dead calm. It was as if the outside world didn’t even exist while there.

The candle on the night stand flickered, stretching out and moving around our shadows. We were lying on the bed, with him in my forelegs as I teased his ear a bit with some nibbling. I can still remember how he would fidget around and nuzzle my neck whenever I did that. He was so adorable when he was like this and I loved it. I… I loved him.

Then there was a knock at the door. “Jet Set, I know you’re in there. Open this door right this minute,” said a female voice. Her accent sounded just like his. “We need to discuss some matters.”

He slowly pushed my legs away and got off the bed. “Jet, what’s going on?”

He looked at more for a moment and opened his mouth, but then closed it before anything came out. Jet walked out of the bed, into the living room where I heard the front door open. I heard the other pony coming inside. “Hello dear,” he said. There was a certain amount of warmth in his voice that I didn’t hear often out of him. The only other time was when he spoke to me.

“I needed to talk to you about your latest affair.”

I kept repeating that word in my head: affair. It just didn’t make any sense. Knowing there was only one way to get my answers, I went out there to see who this mare was. The yellow unicorn and I locked eyes as soon as I went through the doorway.

“You must be Blues. A pleasure to make your acquaintance,” she said with a bow of her head. “I am Upper Crust, Jet Set’s wife.”

The throat tightened when I repeated that last word, “Wife?” I turned from Upper Crust to Jet, but he looked away from me.

“That… is correct,” he said

“Now then, firstly, I’m sorry for my husband not making you aware.” She turned her gaze upon Jet. “And you, we talked about this over and over again. I don’t care about you little trysts on the side, but you are to be discreet about it. The last thing I need is you giving those mules in the country club something to gossip about.” She glanced back at me, “Though I suppose I can give you some credit for picking a stallion this time. However rumors will still start if you keep treating him like you do in public.”

My relationship with him was all lie. I was just an affair for him, nothing but someone who he sleeps with on the side when his wife isn’t around. Part of me wanted to give him the hardest kick I could, another part just wanted to cry and another wanted to be as far away from him as possible. I walked back into the bedroom and grabbed some bits.

“Blues wait, please?” he begged.

“Go to Tartarus.” I wasn’t going to listen to anything he had to say. He had yanked me around long enough and I wasn’t going to waste anymore of my time with him.

I left the cabin, walked to Ponyville and took the train back to Manehatten. From what Scratch told me, I was in tears when she let me into her place. I don’t remember. All I know is that me and her drank more alcohol than what should be possible and I moved back to Ponyville shortly afterwards. I can’t say that Jet wasn’t one of my reasons for leaving the city.

***

Blues got up with a grunt and went into his bathroom. He stared into the mirror. “Dude, you look like crap.”

He couldn’t help but to compare his relationship with Jet to this thing going on with Macintosh. He believed that he was definitely trading up. Macintosh was honest and Blues knew full well that he didn’t have a secret wife. However, having him take Dash to a family reunion had brought up his bad memories of Jet. Once again he was someone’s secret love. One bit of doubt in particular kept working its way into his thoughts over and over.

Is he really worried about what his family will think… or is he ashamed of it?

He shook the thoughts out of his mind. “I need to go do something before I make myself crazy.” Blues grabbed his sax and headed out the door.