Author's Note
hopefully this makes for a good quick chuckle to brighten someones day, or just to get a smile on your face. Plus, just look at that picture! i had to use it for a story!
Revenge Is So Sweet
Anon was used to weird situations happening to him. From being drugged and waking up in a gay strip club, and ending up with the contact information with a wealthy business man. There was even that one time where Anon won a free months payed vacation to Australia, and he didn’t do anything to warrant it. And to even being grabbed from a large eagles talon, being pulled through what looks like a blue black-hole, and then being thrown at a group of techno-colored ponies. So yeah, Anon is defiantly no stranger to weird or bizarre situations.
But this…this is defiantly at the top of his list.
“…ugh, Double Tap…I’m not so sure I’m 100% kosher with this plan of yours…especially how we’re doing it.”
Anon is currently standing in one of the many alleyways of Ponyville, on a Saturday afternoon, dressed in some of his newest causal clothes…while holding a small grey coated earth pony mare with a mane, and tail of black with two white streaks running through them, in the manner one would hold a rifle. The mare that is named Double Tap is certainly one of the oddest ponies that the young man has ever meet, and that’s even among the ponies that he knows pretty well after being stranded in Equestria five months ago. Now don’t take this the wrong way, Double Tap is one of Anon’s best friends, as far as ponies go, it’s just…Double Tap can be a little…weird. Even by ponies standard
“Come on Anon this is perfect! This is the best way to get Rainbow Dash & Pinkie Pie back!” Double Tap said as she tries to get comfortable in Anon’s grasp.
“They will rue the day that they ever decided to prank me with that stack of waffles!” the mare punctuated her statement by punching out her right hoof, before pulling it back in.
Anon thought back to that exact day, which was only yesterday. both he and Double Tap were simply enjoying having a nice jog around the town, getting in a little exercise, while talking about stuff that's been happening in their life. but as the pair reached the park, Double Tap's nose started to twitch, as she smelled something. Something sweet, something that was making her mouth drool, and when she followed her nose she found the culprit. sitting on a tree stump, a large plate of freshly made waffles, covered in butter, maple syrup, with just a little garnish of strawberries and blueberries. but as the mare sat down in front of the tree stump with the plate of waffles on it, Anon watched from a safe distance as the moment Double Tap took one bite of the waffles...she was assaulted by water balloons filled with what looked like chocolate sauce, before having a pile of feathers dropped onto her. All of which coated not only the mare, but the stack of waffles as well.
“How could any pony use the greatest food in the world—NO! The whole universe—for such a nefarious deed!?” the mare bemoaned as she threw a leg over her head, sighing in a dramatic fashion.
“In retrospect Tap…it was blatantly obvious that stack of waffles was a trap.” Anon said as he re-adjusted Double Tap’s position in his arms. “I mean it was a stack of freshly made waffles in the middle of the park…don’t you think that was just a WEEE bit suspicious?”
“I WILL HAVE MY REVENGE!” was all Double Tap’s response to Anon’s words was, causing the human to just give a exasperated sigh, quickly figuring that there’s talking the mare out of her plan.
The pair has been waiting in the alleyway for about an hour, going onto two, just to catch a glimpse of Rainbow Dash when she came by Sugarcube Corner, when she comes to get her daily apple brown betty. And as the pair waited…well actually it was Double Tap who was waiting, Anon was just sort of dragged into this situation, but anyway, the pair have been waiting for so long they have garnered some confused, or even suspicious looks from other ponies passing by. But Anon wasn’t to bothered by the looks the were getting, ponies find him odd enough already, so why should this be any different. The only thing that does bother the young man, was the fact that his face has been mere inches from Double Taps rear end, and getting a generous view of her tail hole, marehood, and her little teats. All of which were causing so many mixed emotions to swirl inside his head…and maybe something else down south, hint, hint.
now Anon isn't to put off the idea of finding a mare physically attractive. granted they don't have the curves, or the typical appeal that human woman had. but the fact that they act like humans, and are able to pull of this weird sexy and yet cute angle, was certainly an unusual paradox to Anon. but it was certainly one that he did not mind in the slightest.
“THERE SHE IS!” Double Tap whispered as she pointed at out towards Sugarcube Corner, where Rainbow Dash has just landed, and entered the confectionery.
“Quick Anon, hoof me my ammo!” The ‘ammo’ was a slice of watermelon that Anon keep in a satchel he had slung over his right shoulder.
Once Anon handed the slice of melon over to Double Tap, the mare took three large bites out of it, expertly separating the seeds from the melon’s flesh, and storing them in her cheeks. Which made her look like an even more adorable chipmunk, or hamster. Anon then ‘cocked’ the mare by petting her back, causing her to shiver, and then going ridged as she stayed perfectly still for Anon to hold her like one his people’s weapons. Double Tap & Anon waited for a few moments later, and when Rainbow Dash finally exited the shop wiping crumbs off her mouth, Double Tap signaled Anon to begin the attack. And with a quick pull of the mares right leg, Double Tap unleashed a barraged of slightly spit-coated watermelon seeds, causing seven other ponies to duck and cover…allowing for a clean—mostly—shot on the cyan mare.
“AGH!” Rainbow Dash cried out as she spun around in place, continuing to be peppered by the seed barrage. The mare slowly feel to the ground, covered in both seed and spit wads, flopping onto the ground in a dramatic fashion. At least it looked like dramatic from Anon’s point of view.
“What’s going on out here?” Pinkie said as she opened the door, giving Double Tap a rush of excitement, before munching away the last of the slice of melon in her hooves.
“All I heard was ponies going ‘AGH’ as they hit the floor, then I heard what sounded like rapid fire raspberries, before hearing Rainbow going ‘NOOOO like she was—” the pink mare then looked down at her friend, laying limp on the ground. “Rainbow Dash!” Pinkie wailed as she dropped to her knees, held the pegasus in her forelegs and looking over her body.
"Rainbow Dash, speak to me! Speak to me Rainbow!" Pinkie wailed as she shook her friends limp body, getting no response in return.
“NOOOOOOOOOoooooooooooo! Who!? Who could’ve done this!?” Pinkie bellowed to the heavens before hearing the distinct sound of a pony making a raspberry sound. And when she looked in the direction, her vision was filled with seeds…seeds and spit wads.
Pinkie closed her eyes as she let’s her friends body fall back to the ground in a heap, before splaying her forelegs out wide at her sides, and embracing the messy barrage. Pony bystanders watched the horrific scene with pure agony, some even reached out towards Pinkie while wailing their own ‘NO!’, as they watched Pinkie take seed & spit wad, as the sound of raspberries filled the air. A minute of this messy brutality later, and Pinkie was covered in seeds and spit, her body falling down to the ground.
Once Pinkie’s body has collapsed to the floor, Anon emerged from his hiding spot, handing over another slice of watermelon to Double Tap. Who took bite, after juicy bite of her melon slice, as the human slowly made his way over to the two fallen mares. Ponies could only watch in horror as the human crossed the road, and then loomed over the two downed ponies like the grim reaper, ready to take them to their after lives. Pinkie Pie had just enough energy left in her to crack open her eyes, and saw the blank expression on Anon’s face, and the sheer joy on Double Taps own face.
“M-mercy. Please…” Pinkie weakly muttered as she pleased. “Have mercy.” But the look on Double Taps face remained stern.
“Sorry, I’m fresh out of mercy.” The mare said through stuffed cheeks, before Anon pulled her right leg, triggering Double Tap to unleash another barrage of seeds and spit wads onto both fallen mare’s. after unleashing a barrage of her ammunition for a whole minute, Double Tap squirmed out of Anon’s grasp, and stood above the fallen ponies, before laughing manically.
“REVENGE IS MINE!” Double Tap announced victoriously as she thrusted her left hoof into the air. “Let this be a warning to all ponies, in that pranking me…will get you a face full of seed!”
The grey pony continued to laugh over her victims for a bit longer, before finally galloping away. All the while reiterating her proclamation about the fate of anyone who would make her the fool, and victim of a prank. As Double Tap departed from the scene of the massacre, the bystanders however started to chase after the mare while shouting about avenging their fallen friends.
Anon meanwhile, just pulled out a pack of gum, and began chewing on the piece as he leaned down to check on the two ponies in front of him. Taking a finger Anon poked both ponies in the belly, the digit sinking into the pudge of Pinkie’s mid-section. He even poked both ponies teats, mostly out of childish glee and curiosity, and noting that they feel just like a woman’s breast, maybe a bit firmer. still getting no response from the two ponies, Anon gently smacked each one on their cheeks, his hands getting a little sloppy from some of the spit coating the two mares.
“You two can stop acting now, Taps long gone now.” Anon said as he placed his right cheek in the palm of his right hand. Pinkie & Rainbow opened their eyes, and slowly sat up, before shaking off the seeds and spit still clinging to their bodies.
“YUCK!” both mares said in tandem as they shook their bodies more vigorously, to make sure they really got rid of the watermelon assault.
“I can’t believe she managed to get both us like that!” Rainbow said as she began flapping her wings. “And did she really had to add salt to the wound by spraying us twice?” Anon blew a bubble before popping it so he could respond.
“You should always remember when fighting someone Dash…always double tap.” Anon said sagely as the mare’s finally shook of their assault.
“We defiantly need to get her back Dashie, ain’t no way any pony sprays me with watermelon seeds and spit, and gets away with it!” Pinkie proclaimed as she stomped a hoof.
“I’m right with you Pinks, but first…” Rainbow said before looking towards Anon, who still had the blank look on his face. “Why don’t we take care of Tap’s accomplice first.” A cheeky smile slowly grew on the cyan ponies muzzle, before the pink one developed her own grin.
“I couldn’t agree more Dashie.” Pinkie said in a very mischievous voice.
Anon just sighed as he hugged his head, running a hand through his hair before standing up to his full height, before having both ponies walk behind him. and then pushing him into Sugarcube Corner…then up the stairs leading to the living quarters. While being pushed around Anon only had one thought on his mind, even as Pinkie closed and locked the door to her room.
‘I wonder if Dash & Pinkie will allow me to join them in their revenge prank towards Double Tap?’
