Hi there, Mommy and Daddy! It’s been a while, hasn’t it? Hope you are both well and swell, and keeping the home fire burning for my return!
Me? Why, I thought you’d never ask! I’m doing super! Ever since I moved out, I’ve been trying to discover my ‘special place’ in life. I always thought I had a ‘destiny’, a ‘true calling’ as it were, and I finally discovered it! Hurray!
You’d be so proud of your little filly! She aced the entry exam (after a few small hiccups) at the Friendship School in Ponyville thanks to three very special gal pals she met soon after arriving, and became Princess Twilight’s new No. 1 assistant! Amazing!!
(I know a certain scaly fellow about my height would question the veracity of that claim, but considering how much the other teachers tease his buffoonery and the fact he doesn’t even get a living wage makes me think they only keep him around for comedic purposes. Still, he’s pretty good at that, so no complaints!)
Anyway, you should’ve seen me in action! I had that place running like clockwork, gave out free gifts and advice like candy and was loved and valued by all! Sadly, there was one racist meanie there by the name of Chancellor Neighsay, but in the end he was too ‘tied up’ to do anything about my plans. Titter.
Alas, six other bad apples decided to ruin things for me while my back was turned, and what's even worse, is they were fellow students too! Jealousy, that’s all it was. All because I wanted a fairer system for distributing magic, and a new role that would’ve given me much more responsibility, I got chased outta town! The sheer nerve!
The most horrible part though was when my former mentor and idol, Twilight Sparkle, told me afterwards she ‘failed’ me. Like I’d done something wrong with her advice! I took all the stuff she taught me about love and friendship and transformed it into something far more powerful and tangible. Why should I feel ashamed about that?
Anyway, it was obviously time for me to move on. And what better place to crash, than with an old penpal? Surely you remember me mentioning him, that poor old centaur who spent every Hearth’s Warming by himself in a dark, dank cave surrounded by vicious creatures. Obviously, I couldn’t let him suffer alone, so as quick as a flash I became his new ~~cel~~ roommate.
I know, I know… I’m all heart. But that’s how you raised me, ain’t it? Giggle.
As fun as it was though, catching up on old times and eating stone-cold porridge every day, the stars aligned to give me another job. On this occasion I was summoned by an almighty ram named Grogar who had big ambitions and even bigger horns! He was putting together a team of go-getters of which I was an integral part, with my unparalleled skill at strategizing (Hello?! Rook cutie mark!) and baking cupcakes! And I even got to take my bestie Tirek along for the ride! Could things get any better?
One of our fresh-faced squad, a naughty stallion calling himself ‘King Sombra’ (although from where I sat, he didn’t rule squat) decided to branch out on his own, but his foolish ambitions were soon exposed as the charade they were. He was deservedly told his services would ‘no longer be required’ in the end, and then it was just me, the big T and the boss man again!
Oh, and some Changeling ‘Queen’ (as you can tell, we had a lot of fake royals there) by the name of Chrysalis, but she didn’t do much besides talk to weird figurines she made and laugh maniacally every night about revenge. Gee-willikers lady, we all hate Starlight, but do you have to be so fixated on her? There is such a thing as beauty sleep, y’know! Try it sometime… maybe then you wouldn’t look so holey and hideous!
Actually, that’s not entirely fair. The three of us did kinda bond during a little ‘outward pursuit’ Grogar set up for us, which involved utilising all of our unique talents together in order to retrieve a very special object. I even got to wear that nice coat Mommy knitted me: it was so chilly up that mountain you wouldn’t believe! Don’t worry, upon my return a refreshing mug of cocoa and the warmth of my ~~frien~~ allies was all I needed to thaw out. Mmm mmm, de-licious!
Once again though, just when I thought things had settled down, life took an unexpected turn. Grogar turned out to not be the ram I thought he was, and together with Tirek and Chrysalis the three of us were forced to go it alone. We did okay though… thanks to a little severance payment we got, all of us felt stronger than ever!
You shoulda seen me Daddy: I felt like I could’ve been queen of everything! Or duchess, but whatever. We were practically unstoppable! It was as if I had wings and a horn, just like you and Mommy together! All the other ponies felt lost and confused: we could’ve guided them on the right path… all they had to do was listen to us without question, and everything would’ve been swell in the end!
It’s safe to say though, despite battling with all our might, things didn’t exactly… go our way. Those poor, misguided creatures rejected our altruistic philosophy and instead chose to listen to mere children. Children!! Yeah, I appreciate the irony here… but you always said I was mature for my age, didn’t you?
Regardless, when all’s said and done, I think things worked out for the best. The last two occasions I tried making a difference to the world, I was unready, unsure, wet behind the ears. Now though, with so much experience behind me and having learned from the door getting slammed in my cutesy freckled face twice now, the third time will surely be the charm!
I’m still living with my buddies Tirek and Chrysalis, who I must say has really grown on me! It’s like we’ve formed an eternal bond, or something. We don’t move around as much as we used to, but we see a lot of people who stop to chat! And boy, do they have a lot to say! We’ve even got our own little inscription up, that spells out all our generous deeds in intimate detail! Cool, or what?
I know it’s been years now… but don’t worry. Your little filly has barely aged a day! As I look out upon this wonderful garden where I live now, I feel a great sense of optimism for the future (although, you wouldn’t think of it sometimes to look at my expression!).
I feel certain that one day we’ll see each other again, when I feel like stretching my wings once more and Equestria is ready to accept my ~~rul~~ charity. Until then, keep smiling, live your best life and remember: I’ll be watching!
Your precious Pegasus for all of perpetuity.
name illegible x
…………………………………….
“This letter arrived for the patients today, doctor..”
“Again, nurse? Let me guess… still no address attached.”
“Correct, doctor. Shall I add it to the others?”
“Yes, do that, nurse… although the heap’s getting so big, it’d take a mountain goat to scale it soon I fear.”
“Is there really no hope for them, doctor?”
“It’s hard to say, nurse. But when you’ve suffered sixty-percent third degree burns and have been in a coma for the best part of ten years, the signs don’t look good. But we’ll keep trying, because that’s what we’re here for.”
“I know, doctor. It’s just so tragic, losing so much of your life and your own daughter in the same housefire. Why do so many bad things happen to nice ponies?”
“Difficult to say, nurse. Life isn’t always fair, but especially to this loving couple. We couldn’t even give their filly a decent burial! The body must’ve been incinerated for them to discover no trace of it...”
“Oh doctor, I don’t want to hear any more! The least I can do though, is go and visit her empty grave to pay my respects later. Where is it and what was her name again?”
“On the outskirts of Ghastly Gorge near the burnt-out remains of her old house, nurse. And her name was Rosy Blow.”
Author's Note
Probably the wrong day to post this, but I'll do it anyway. 
I've always like speculating on the past of everyone's favourite felonious filly, and this is one of my darker interpretations. Because, based on the behaviour we saw... you can't exactly put it past her, can you. 
Anyway, see you all again soon for hopefully something a bit lighter... 
