The TARDIS in Equestriaby gigglykitkatsChaptersStrange SightsWhen I Wake UpOk, Now I'm Really ConfusedMy Sonic Screwdriver in Ponyville?Well, That Went WellTemporary MisplacmentThe Shadows Hold the AnswersStrange SightsExplosions wracked the air around me as I frantically tried to restart the TARDIS mid-regeneration. "Come on, come on, come on! Why won't you work! You and me, I thought you were supposed to take me to where I needed to go! Start working! Now!" I stumbled around the console, desperately trying to sonic anything that could be moderately helpful. Just a few minutes before, a stray Adipose had found its way into the time rotor, by means of which I do not know. It promptly exploded, rupturing the rotor mid-time travel, which then broke a few parts of the console, also throwing me against the wall, starting my regeneration cycle. Lights were flashing, alarms going, pieces of the TARDIS sparking with electricity and then going silent, fried beyond use. Unfortunately for me, the parts of the TARDIS that had exploded along with the rotor were the ones that I desparately needed to stop the TARDIS in whatever galaxy it was currently traveling to. I felt myself weakening, and I started seeing the glow surround my hands. "No! Just a few more minutes! Let me figure this out before everything goes completely wibbly wobbly timey wimey!" I started seeing the glow in the corner of my eyes, signifying that it had started around my head and everywhere around my body. I lost myself in the glow, and it took over my body, changing it into whatever form it would take on next. As though my day couldn't get any worse, my own personal explosion only sent the TARDIS into a part of the Universe I had never been too, where it crash landed in a place I had never seen, or even heard of for that matter. As my body reformed, I felt my senses coming back to me, slowly but surely. I raised my hand to get a good look at my new body, when I noticed a piece of the TARDIS falling from the ceiling, heading straight for my face. "Holy sh-" Was all I managed before I blacked out once again. ***** "Wait, WHAT! THEY LEAVE THE EPISODE LIKE THAT! WORST. ENDING. EVER! WE DIDN'T EVEN GET TO SEE HIS NEW FACE!" A loud, scratchy voice pulled the other pony back out of her state of disbelief. "I didn't even think they could end something that terribly. BOO DOCTOR WHO!" Derpy said, throwing the popcorn she and Dash had found in Dash's cloud home at the screen. Rainbow Dash and Derpy had just finished watching the latest episode of "Doctor Who", and neither of them could be more distressed about the ending. Derpy had discovered Dash was a Doctor Who fan when she had caught Dash watching the episodes from outside of Derpy's window. No doubt Rainbow had a fascination with the one show on television that featured humans, and even though nopony knew, Dash was actually a big fan of science fiction. Rainbow had denied ever watching the show when Derpy confronted her about it, even saying that she wouldn't spend her time on something so boring. Derpy then invited Dash to come and watch it with her for once then, and Rainbow gave away her cover when she accidentally named all the characters and the monsters in the episode. Now the two of them had a weekly get together to watch the latest episodes, and discuss what could happen next. Derpy was happy that Dash had finally stopped making fun of her eyes, now that they were friends. She was even giving Derpy lessons to help correct her eyes, so that nopony else teased her about them. Derpy could see enough of the television to see the worst ending of an episode EVER. Neither one of them had been prepared for not even being able to see the newest face of the Doctor. "When does the next season come out again?" Rainbow asked, finally getting over her indignation. Derpy sighed, "Next fall. We have an entire year to wait to see his new look." Rainbow was just about to reply when they both heard a huge BOOM coming from outside. They rushed to the door of the cloud home just in time to see a fireball coming down from the sky and landing deep in the Everfree forest. "What the hay was that?!" Dash exclaimed, getting ready to hop of the cloud and investigate the crash site. Derpy grabbed her tail right as she was about to take off. It took her two tries to get the right tail of the two that were dancing in front of her crossed eyes. "Are you crazy! It's dark! THE EVERFREE FOREST! We are NOT going in there tonight. Who knows what's out there?! And we are not going to wake Fluttershy up to stare down any manticores or cockatrices in there for us, ok? We'll go first thing tomorrow!" "Ugh, fine" Rainbow replied. "But we are going early, I wanna see what that was, and it could be gone tomorrow!" "Ok, whatever. Meet me at the entrance tomorrow at 8. We'll find whatever that thing was. See ya tomorrow, Dash" Derpy lept off the cloud and flew to her own home, excited at what the fireball actually was, and how she would be finding out early tomorrow. When I Wake UpI awoke with a groan, the ceiling swimming above me in a way I was 90 percent sure was NOT supposed to happen. The top of the TARDIS slowly came into focus, the events prior to my current predicament still a haze. My head was aching in a way I was 100 percent sure was not supposed to happen. Ok... time rotor...explosion...regeneration... blackout...wait, regeneration. REGENERATION. I sat up quickly and my headache became my primary concern for the moment. Ok, not a good idea to sit up super fast after you have just been knocked out. I grasped my head with my hands and I heard a dull clopping sound. Wait a second, I am fairly certain my head has NEVER made that noise. I looked at my hands to make sure there wasn't anything on them that could have caused the strange noise. I stared at my hands, eyes widening when I realized that they no longer took on the appearance of the ten fingers and palms I have known for the past 909 years. Wait, hooves? When did that happen? I had never regenerated into anything that didn't take on a human like appearance. What the hell? I took on my usual post regeneration routine, quickly starting to inspect different aspects of my physical appearance and making sure nothing had been left out. Ears. Short and furry, and in a different place than I expected, but check. Eyes, check. Nose, what the heck? It's never been this big before. Ugh, I must be a mutant, no one will EVER be able to take me seriously now. Hair, shaggy, and from what I can see of it, dark brown. That's it, I need to look in the mirror. I stood up on my legs and promptly fell over. What, can I no longer walk on two legs now? I decided to go for the dog style and walk on all fours over to the mirror. This is humiliating. My feet made a clop sound as they progressed over to the other side of the TARDIS, the entire time I was thinking, Ok, it can't be that bad! I mean, I have weird feet and stuff, but that won't change much... will it? Oh god, will I even be able to work the TARDIS? Am I stuck here forever!? I'm screwed! I looked in the mirror, and stared at my new form. I'M A PONY!? Wait, what the hell? This has NEVER happened to another time lord as far as I'm concerned. What do I do? Why the hell am I a pony! I can't be a pony! I'm the Doctor! I went over all the possible scenarios in my head, and the most logical response I came up with was when the TARDIS was exploding, it started traveling through all the alternate universes, and when I regenerated, it forced the TARDIS into emergency lock down and landed in the closest galaxy. Therefore, I regenerated into whatever life form lived here, so a...pony. Ok, this is officially crazy. Ugh, I'm never going to live this one down. I noticed a spot of color on my flank, and turned sideways at the mirror. An hourglass was on my butt. Ok, what does that even mean? I don't even...ok, whatever. I'll figure it out later. I turned towards the console. Wait a second, can I still work the TARDIS? I unstably ran (more like an attempted gallop) over to the console and looked it over. Apparently when it had crashed in a different universe, the TARDIS itself had also regenerated, changing the switches and levers to shapes and sizes that were far more compatible with my hooves. My hooves. I shook my head to stop thinking about them, and tried flipping switches to get out of this universe. It was going to burn up a lot of power, but it would be worth it when I was in my normal form. The TARDIS started up, and the new time rotor started going up and down. I heard a sound that I hated hearing, the systems failing. The time rotor stopped working. What the hell? "Oh, common dear, let's go! What, can you not leave this galaxy? Oh god, please tell me you can still leave this galaxy." No matter what I did, the TARDIS would not start up enough to leave the universe. I looked up on the scanner, trying to figure out which planet I was on. Everfree Forest, Equestria. Also known as an alternate form of Earth. Wherever that was, I had never even heard of the Everfree Forest and Equestria. I tried for some places that I did know might be here, in this time period. First stop, the moon. Ok, so the TARDIS still works. I figured, after stepping out of the TARDIS onto the bare landscape full of concave dents and dust. I trotted around, making sure this wasn't just a totally random place. I spotted a bit of color coming from the corner of my eye. I looked around and ran towards it, stopping when I saw a bed, mini roller coaster, giant refrigerator, and lots of toys. Wait, someone lived here on the moon? Judging by how old the toys were, this person (or pony, for that matter) had been here for a long time. Ah well, it looks like they have left already, the bed was full of dust and the toys lying in pathetic heaps on the surface of the moon. I went back into the TARDIS to try and see other places that I knew of. Ok, this was officially mind blowing. Not only was everything, basically the same, it was all pony-fied and strange! Camelot was Canterlot, Philadelphia was Fillydelphia, Manhattan was Manehattan, and everyone was a pony! Ugh, this was way to strange for my post regeneration brain to handle. I stepped out of the TARDIS to look at my surroundings, and maybe meet some ponies that could try and help me to make sense out of all of this. ***** Derpy's first view of the next morning was of her carpet. She flipped over and looked up, surprised at the seconds ago short moment of free fall before landing on the floor next to her bed. Rainbow Dash was hovering in her face, an excited and slightly mischievious grin taking over her features. Derpy groaned and threw a pillow at Dash. "Derpy! The fireball! Come. On! Get your flank off the ground and let's go to the Everfree forest!" Derpy shot up, the events of last night finally catching up to her. Wide awake, she nodded to Rainbow, and they promptly shot out of the window of Derpy's home and created two blurs that crossed over Ponyville, one yellow and gray, the other rainbow. They stopped just outside of the Everfree forest. Just because they had both been inside lots of times, it was still a place full of Manticores and other beasts lurking in the shadows. They looked at each other and nodded, and quickly traversed into the forest, eager to discover what had fallen from the sky late the previous night. ***** A few hours later, they still hadn't discovered the site of the crash. Derpy's wings were getting tired, and as much as Rainbow Dash tried to deny it, hers ached a little too. They were just starting to get discouraged, when a light brown earth pony stumbled through the undergrowth. He had a short brown shaggy mane, a light brown body, blue eyes, and an hourglass cutie mark. He looked incredibly confused. "Uh, you ok there? You look a little lost. What the hay are you doing out here in the Everfree forest?" The flying pony with the rainbow mane asked me, a little wary, I could see it. "Long story, don't ask. And even if you did, I wouldn't know what to tell you. My TA-... form of transportation crashed late last night, and I just woke up. May I ask your names? And what you are doing out here?" Woah, he talks really fast. And he sounds really familiar... Derpy thought. "Uh, I'm Derpy, and that's Rainbow Dash." Rainbow Dash gave a little salute at the mention of her name. "We saw something fall out of the sky late yesterday, and we decided to go investigate." I panicked, I can't let them know I'm a time traveler, not even from this galaxy for that matter. "Yeah, strange... I have no idea what that crash was, I mean, it wasn't me. How could it be me? My TA- form of transportation can't fly! Haha weird." A silence befell the three of us as they tried to work out what I said. "Yeah, um, so, can you show me the way out of this place? And show me where the nearest civilization is? That'dbegreatthanks." I finished talking in a rush. The rainbow maned pegasus looked at me curiously, and a look of realization and curiosity found its way onto her face. "Sure thing..." She said cautiously. "But don't get any funny ideas, there's something you're not telling us." Shoot, she was perceptive. I gulped, and followed them as they turned and started leading the way (hopefully out of the forest). I made note of all the twists and turns they made, hoping to find my way back to the TARDIS later. They were whispering furiously to each other. The thought I was currently pondering over was along the lines of, were all ponies like this? Ok, Now I'm Really ConfusedThe two pegasi kept whispering in front of me, every couple of minutes they would turn around and glance at me. It was starting to get kind of creepy. I could only catch little snippets of their conversation, hearing words like, "weird, cutie mark, comet, show, trust, muffins" that sort of thing. If you can even guess what their chat was about. I sure as hell couldn't. "What are they talking about?" I thought. They turned back to look at me again. "You." The rainbow one said bluntly. I realized I had said that out loud. "Heh, sorry. Carry on." I felt my cheeks heating up. Do ponies blush? Does it just turn a darker shade of their coat, or is it red like humans? What if there is a red pony who blushes, does it even show up? I kept inching my way through the forest, how do you even walk with these things?! I wondered if I could manipulate my brain with my sonic, so that walking on all fours came naturally to me. SONIC SCREWDRIVER! WHERE IS IT?! I frantically searched all over me, running my hooves through my mane and tail in the small chance it had gotten there. Ah well, it was probably back in the TARDIS. To take my mind off things, I decided to study the two pegasi in front of me. Rainbow Dash was flying gracefully and in a straight line, whilst Derpy was constantly leaning to one side and going every which way. Somehow, she still managed to stay upright. I guess it kinda worked. She had an image of seven bubbles on her flank, and I thought back to my own hourglass. Rainbow Dash had a tri colored lightning bolt. I guess everypony has one. I wonder what it actually means? I thought about how useful it would be to just fly over all the roots and creepers trying to give my face an introduction to the ground. They looked back at me one last time, and flew over so that they were hovering only a few feet above my heads, on both sides of me. "So, where are you from?" Derpy, asked. I looked up at her, and noticed her eyes were facing different directions. Huh, well that would explain her flying skills. "Um, Canterlot?" I replied, recalling one of the places I had seen on the map in the TARDIS. "Huh..." Rainbow Dash said absentmindedly, lazily flitting about over my head. " So you know the princesses then?" "Princesses?" They stared at me. "Princess Celestia and Luna? They only run the entire land of Equestria and raise and lower the sun and moon? What, do you live under a rock?! You can't really live in Canterlot and not know them." Rainbow Dash said. "OH. You mean those Princesses. Of course I know them! It was just a... clarifying question." "Doesn't Princess Celestia do such a good job at raising the moon? And the Wonderbolts did such a good job at banishing Nightmare Moon, don't ya think?" Derpy gushed, glancing at Rainbow Dash with one of her eyes, the other one focusing on who knows what. "...yeah, the Wonderbolts were spectacular at that. And Princess Celestia does an amazing job at raising the moon!" I said, hoping they fell for it. Dash looked at Derpy, and then narrowed her eyes at me. She looked like she was just about to ask me a question when the trees stopped, and I was looking out on a small cottage right along the edge of the trees. Yes! Finally out of the forest. I looked back, and shuddered. I just came out of that? Ah well, I wonder who lives here in the cottage. Might as well get to know everypony, it looks like I'll be stuck here for a while. Hold on, I thought everypony instead of everybody. What is happening to me!? Just then another pegasus came out from behind the cottage, with a basket of carrots hanging in her mouth. She was tall and skinny, with a long pink mane and a yellow body. I looked at her flank. Yep, three butterflies. What does the mark even mean?! Also, am I the only pony with no wings? It was kinda starting to seem that way. " Hey Fluttershy!" Rainbow Dash yelled. The yellow pegasus squeaked and dropped her basket. Rainbow Dash rolled her eyes and flew over to the pink and yellow heap cowering on the ground. "It's me, Dash. You can stop hiding now... We brought a colt who Derpy and I think you should meet. His name is... wait, we never got your name. What's your name?" " Um, John Smith!" I said quickly, using the pseudonym I always used. Before I came here to Equestria, that was a perfectly normal name. Here however, in a place filled with names like Rainbow Dash, Derpy, Fluttershy, Celestia, and Luna, I wasn't so sure. Ah well, it will add to the illusion of me being a foreigner. Fluttershy looked up and blushed. "Oh, hi Rainbow Dash." Or at least that's what I assume she said. From where I was, it sounded like, "oh, hmm, rmammmowahhmmm" Rainbow flew back over to me. "That's Fluttershy. We're still working on her outside voice." I walked up to her, and said, "Hi!" She scuffed the ground with her hoof, hiding behind her long mane. I wondered if I would ever get to see her full face. "um... hi." She said, then she squeaked. "Um, it was nice meeting you..." She went silent. Considering I knew every language spoken everywhere, it was quite a surprise when I realized I don't know how to speak "mumble". Apparently, Fluttershy was completely fluent in that language. There was an awkward silence that was broken only by Dash and Derpy's best attempts to not laugh out loud at my social abilities. I looked around, and tried to start a conversation. "...so, you like animals?" Her head snapped up, and I finally saw her face. She was actually quite pretty. "Oh yes! I love animals and taking care of them, and helping them to be the best they can be. It's my special talent, you know. I got my cutie mark for it!" Ok, so now I know she can actually form sentences. This is good. But what is a cutie mark? Also, her voice was pretty cute. "Cool! I can see they really like you too!" Awkward silence filled the air once again. Dash decided to be nice and stepped in for us, "Sorry Fluttershy, we really need to get going and do... stuff. See ya!" "Good bye!" Fluttershy said, now much louder and not as mumbly. Derpy waved to her and we started walking towards the town in the distance. "Wait, where are we going again?" I asked, kind of confused. "Places, I need to show you something..." Derpy said, glancing at Rainbow Dash, who nodded. "Um, ok?" I continued walking behind the pegasi when I noticed a small cloud of dust far away, coming up the path I was walking on. "RAINBOWWWWWWWWWWWW!" The rapidly increasing in size dust cloud yelled. I could make out the colors purple and orange speeding towards me. A glint of blue and red underneath. A bike or something? A scooter! "Oh no, SQUIRT! WATCH OUT FOR JO-" *SMASH* The last thing I heard before I blacked out for the second time that day was "CUTIE MARK CRUSADERS PONY SMASHERS YAY!" My Sonic Screwdriver in Ponyville?" Scootaloo, what the hay! I thought you had stopped bowling ponies over!" "It was an accident! He got in my way! It's not my fault!" "Is he dead?" "Lemme help him, maybe ah can get mah cutie mark in healin' stuff!" "Um, girls? Give him space. You kind of just knocked him out. Besides, I think he's waking up." I opened my eyes, hazily taking in the view above me. Orange, white, and yellow filled up my vision, fuzzy blobs of color that I couldn't name even if I tried. As my vision cleared, I saw three, younger looking ponies looking down at me, invading a little more than what was comfortable of my personal space. I jumped, and sat up quickly, and collided heads with all three ponies. Huh, that's a new one. I thought, grasping my aching head. The three young fillies were sitting in a line, expressions ranging from curious to sheepish to guilt. All of them were rubbing their heads like I was. I quickly examined their flanks. No mark. Wait, what? Now I didn't even know what to think. I guess it was some wacked up version of pony maturity. We stared at each other for a few seconds, before Rainbow Dash sighed and said, "What is it with you and awkward introductions? You can't talk when meeting someone, but then you can't shut up once you get started! Anyways, meet the cutie mark crusaders." "Ah'm Apple Bloom!" The yellow one with the red mane and pink bow told me with a cute southern accent. "Scootaloo!" That one saluted, and I noticed her voice, mane style, and basic mannerism strongly parodied Rainbow Dash's. " And I'm Sweetie Belle!" The purple, pink, and white pony's voice cracked on her name, as she pounced in front of the others and flapped her arms. Ok, so she wants to be a bird. That's cool. "I'm John Smith". I said, standing back up on all fours. "That's a funny name!" Scootaloo looked at me, trying to change her face into a look of disbelief, the exact same face I saw Rainbow Dash doing a few seconds earlier. "Well, your name's Scootaloo. And I presume that is your scooter that crashed into me?" I remarked after noticing the blue scooter on it's side a few feet away, wheels still spinning. "Heh, yeah. I kind of lost control. It hasn't happened for a long time." "Wait, why are you called the Cutie Mark Crusaders?" I asked. This time Sweetie Belle spoke. "We're trying to find our special talents to get our cutie marks! It's taken a while though. We've tried ice skating, bowling, zip lining, candy making, baking, apple bucking..." I tuned her out for the better part of three minutes. "... swimming, lion taming, chimney sweeping, and just now, pony smashing! You never know when you might need to knock down a pony. We keep on trying new things!" "That's... cool. But why are you trying those things? Why not something you already know how to do?" "Cuz we don't think it'l lead to our special talents! And anyways, ah think that we would've figured them out already, if we knew what to do!" Apple Bloom said. Wow, her accent was really cute. Scootaloo examined my flank. "An hourglass cutie mark? How'd you get that?" OH. CUTIE MARK. *That's what it is. It makes so much more sense now.* Oh shoot, how did I get it? "Um, that's... classified? Only the coolest ponies can figure it out." "Well, I'm a cool pony! Let's see... you make hourglasses? Your special talent is being on time? Uh, you really like sand?" "How about none of the above?" Special talent. Ok, so cutie mark comes when you realize your special talent. Got it. "Ugh, well, I'm not giving up yet! I'm the second most coolest pony in Ponyville!" "So then, who's the coolest?" I heard a throat clearing, and Rainbow Dash striked a pose in mid air. "The one and only! Squirt here still needs to learn to watch where she's going. She'll never be as cool as me though, not in a MILLION years." "Wait, Scootaloo needs to watch where she's going? You crashed into the library yesterday. There's still a big hole that is, oddly enough, Rainbow Dash shaped." Derpy said, looking at Dash. Rainbow blushed. "Heh, yeah, still working on my landings. But Squirt here just knocked a pony down, on the ground, with her scooter, which could've easily been avoided. Therefore, your argument is invalid, and I win. MWAHAHA!" Derpy stared at Rainbow Dash. She opened her mouth as though to say something, and then shut it, giving up. "Whatever Dash, we still need to get John here over to my place, to show him the special thing, remember?" Rainbow nodded, and told the Cutie Mark Crusaders to go ask Fluttershy if they could help out with her animals again. Seeing the three of them tumble over to her cottage, I seriously doubted that the animals would live to see the next day. Fluttershy would have fun. We continued on our way back to... Ponyville? That's kind of a strange name. Ah well, at least I'll get to meet new ponies and stuff. I'll need to make as many friends as possible, because as long as I'm here, something is bound to go wrong, and having other peop-ponies to back you up is always nice. "How did you get here anyways?" Rainbow Dash pulled me out of my thoughts with a question. "I... walked. Then I got lost in the Everfree forest, and that's when I found you and Derpy." "You walked here from Canterlot? You do know that's way up there, right?" She pointed to a far away city/castle up on a mountain. Crud, I said I walked from there!? "Um, yeah. It took a while though, and-hey! We're here! So what's Ponyville like anyways? Are all ponies here like the Cutie Mark Crusaders and you two and Fluttershy? What do you do around here? Are there any male ponies? Wait, there has to be, or else how do you... never mind. Any good resturaunts? What do they have?" I tried to ask as many questions as possible to get Rainbow Dash off of the topic. "Um, Ponyville's great, no, weather patrol, yeah, no comment, sorta,... true?" Dash tried to remember my questions. She was close enough, not everyone can have a memory like mine. I looked around Ponyville, taking in all of the sites. It was a quaint little village, full of cute little houses buildings. One I noticed was shaped like a gingerbread house. Everywhere I turned, ponies stopped to look at me. Am I really that abnormal looking? Did my regeneration leave me looking super strange? I mean, I was the only male pony I've met so far, so I couldn't really go off of what females looked like. There were still no red ponies. I really wanted to try that blushing thing. We approached the gingerbread building, Derpy giving me little facts about the town and naming the ponies as we passed them. This pink pony started bouncing out of the building. Bouncing? How do you even do that? I was just making up my mind to try when I was alone in a place where no one could see me when the pink pony locked eyes with me. She had a light pink body, bright pink poofy mane, and blue eyes. Her cutie mark was three balloons. That was kind of- *GASP* She took me out of my thoughts as she jumped up into the sky. Ok, this pony was weird. Bouncing, and... flying? What the hay? "HI! I'm Pinkie Pie, what's your name? I know that you're new here, because I havn't seen you before, and I've seen everypony in Ponyville, because I know everypony! I should throw you a party! With gumdrops and streamers and sugar and balloons and confetti and- where did you come from? Did you drop out of the sky like SHOOM and then ran over here like WHOOSH! Do you like bananas? I know you like bananas. Bananas are good! Why aren't you wearing a bow tie? Or a fez? Oh, I just remembered! I had a present for you! I knew you were looking for it, so I kept track of it! Here you go!" She pulled my sonic screwdriver out of nowhere and tossed it at me. Wait, why does she have it? How does she know about my obsession with bananas, bow ties, and fezzes? WHAT "Um, thanks?" I said, as the screwdriver hit me in the face. I examined it closely, apparently the buttons were gone. Cool, how was I supposed to use it then? I guess its just all telepathic now. Also, how was I supposed to carry this thing? I looked around, and I noticed all the ponies who weren't unicorns carrying things in their mouths, or tucking it in their mane. I picked it up with my mouth, and promptly spit it back out. That tastes disgusting. I picked it up again and quickly put it behind my ear, out of sight. That's better. Now I have it and I don't have to taste it. "Wait, how did you get my sonic screwdriver?" I asked Pinkie Pie. Rainbow Dash and Derpy gasped, and then started whispering furiously to each other. When I turned back to face Pinkie Pie, she was gone. Wait, where did she go? Nopony can move that fa- "WHEEEEEEEEE!" A voice called out from above me, and I see Pinkie falling from a few feet above me. What the hay? How did she get up there? "How are you doing that? I am loving it! You're like, Houdini, only one slightly creepy pink pony and he was shorter, will be shorter. Anyways, how did you do that?" I started speaking to her, unintentionally matching her fast paced style of talking. "What do you mean? You just climb up the side of the invisible box, and then fall back down. Easy peasy icing squeezy!" I stared. You know what, I'm just going to add that to the ever growing list of things that I don't understand in this place. I blinked, and she was gone, bouncing and giggling fifty feet away from me. What is this- I don't even- UGH. Never mind. " That was Pinkie Pie. She's like the craziest pony here. You get used to her after a while." Rainbow Dash looked at me sympathetically. I didn't even know she could make that face, she just didn't seem like that type of pony. "Let's hope so. So where were you taking me again?" "Over to my home. Come on, we need to show you something." Derpy said, her and Dash already starting to fly away. I decided to follow them, because unfortunately, they were my best bet to actually understand anything in this town. Well, That Went Well"So... this is where you live? And why exactly am I here?" I asked as we approached the small cottage on the other side of Ponyville. it was almost like Fluttershy's, except this one was much bigger and... for lack of better words, kind of muffin shaped. Ok then, that's cool. I've seen weirder. "Yeah, the thing I'm showing you, it's inside. Come on in!" Derpy said as she opened the door. I walked in, and my eyes widened. It was... normal. I thought something would be really crazy, or there be double of everything (you know, for her eyes. So if she tried to sit down or something, she would always end up on a chair) Rainbow flapped in and gracefully landed. I just realized that was the first time she had put her hooves on the ground since I met her. She locked the door behind me. Kinda creepy. Well, I had my sonic, so all was good. Rainbow blocked the door, and faced me with a determined look. I turned around to Derpy, and discovered she had the same facial expression. Ok, not good. They started to advance on me. What the hay, what the hay, what the hay!? Please don't let them have a secret lust for confused brown stallions! I stood my ground, and asked, "Heh, why are you coming towards me with a creepy expression? Why don't we all just work things out instead? Talking, that is the key to making friends and settling conflicts!" Derpy looked at me, and said, "Ok, just stop talking. We know who you are." What did they mean?! How could they?! I didn't even know this place existed, how could they know where I was from? Rainbow went over to the television in the corner and turned to a specific channel. There I was, in the TARDIS, trying to get rid of the Adipose that ruined my poor TARDIS. WHAT?! "Um, I don't know what you're talking about... why are you showing me this on the television?" Rainbow Dash spoke up, coming out from behind the television. "Uh, because you're the Doctor? And something happened, that pony-fied you? We don't know, all we do know is that the end of this episode ended with the TARDIS crashing and us not seeing the regenerated face, and then you show up all of a sudden with the same mannerisms and looks. And the sonic screwdriver, that was kind of a give away." I blinked. All I could think was, Crud, crud, crud, crud, crud, what do I do? I stuttered. "How do you know this is me? I mean there's no point in denying it, but how am I being filmed? I've never had ANY idea I was being watched..." Derpy shrieked and started twirling in mid air, going hazardly all over the room. "I KNEW IT! HA! HE IS THE DOCTOR! AND THAT EXPLOSION HAD TO BE THE TARDIS CRASHING! THIS IS SO EXCITING DASH!" Rainbow Dash was silent, looking at me with a slack jaw and a look of awe on her face. It was like she was about to start bowing to me and saying "I'm not worthy" or something. She spluttered, "But, you're you! And I mean I had a hunch and all but you actually admitting it? This is the best day ever! Oh pleasepleasepleasepleasepleaseeeee lemme take a ride in the TARDIS!" This was just too weird. How did they even know who I am? WHY IS MY EVERY MOVE BEING WATCHED ON THAT TELEVISION!? I could hardly think, what with Rainbow Dash looking at me like that and stuttering and Derpy still shrieking above me, constantly crashing into things. "Ok, could you both just CALM DOWN!" I shouted, trying to figure out my next move. It was like time had paused. They stopped moving all together and sat down, looking at me with this look in their eyes I had unfortunately come to know so well. Admiration. Ugh, how I hated that. Past regenerations may have liked the attention, but not me. Especially when all I was doing was talking and looking confused today. No more ignoring my questions, time to get them to listen. After all, they did hold me in some kind of respect, I could get them to listen for hopefully two minutes. If I'm lucky... "Ok. Answer every question I ask. With the truth. How did you know who I was?" "On the tv." They answered in unison. "We love the show Doctor Who, and we watch it every saturday. Then at the end of last night's episode, the TARDIS crashed and we never saw the regenerated you. Then we saw a comet coming out from the sky, and crashing in the Everfree forest. We went to investigate, and there you were." Derpy said, it all coming out in a breathless rush. I guess Pinkie Pie had unintentionally taught other ponies how to talk fast and without taking breaths. "Ok, I guess that makes sense. But why am I on television?" That question stumped them for a while, until Rainbow Dash said, "We dunno. It's the only human show that they show here in Equestria. All we know is that the guy from our favorite tv show crashes here in Equestria but pony-fied. I thought it was all scripted..." "Scripted? SCRIPTED? My life is NOT scripted. I've never been scripted in my life! And that's a long time." I answered, offended. Silence. "Ok, so... that's all the information we have?" I asked, looking at the two of them. They nodded. "Well then, that was not helpful at all. I've gotta get back to the TARDIS, maybe I can find answers there. She's never failed me yet, let's just hope she doesn't feel like this would be a good time for a first." I jumped up, and went over to the door. Still locked. Ok, time to figure out how this sonic screwdriver worked. I shook my mane and the screwdriver came tumbling out, and I caught it in midair. Ignoring the taste, I pointed it at the lock and focused. Nothing. Ugh, fine, be that way. I thought harder... I wonder... I bit down on a certain part of it, and focused on unlocking the door. The blue light that I had come to know so well lit up, along with that strange buzzing noise. The lock clicked open. Yeah, still got it. I ran out the door and looked back, seeing the two mares still sitting on the ground. "Aren't you coming?" They looked at me, and Rainbow Dash spoke. "Can we? I mean, we wouldn't want--... ok ya know what? We're going whether you like it or not. Come on Derpy, let's go and show the TARDIS who's boss." They both jumped up and followed me, and we ran back through the forest on the route that I had memorized. Huh, they could make good companions one day, just as soon as we figure this whole mess out. Temporary MisplacmentWe burst into the clearing where I hid the TARDIS, and I skidded to a stop. Unfortunately, the mares behind me were not prepared for my quick stop, and they crashed into me and we promptly collided into a nearby tree. My face took most of the impact. I sat back, clutching my head with my hooves. “HOW MANY TIMES AM I GOING TO BE HIT IN THE HEAD TODAY? I mean, I just need to be more careful now... ok, that’s not going to happen, but the thought is nice. Ok, just stay away from hard surfaces... Ok that’s not going to happen either. Why does whatever I say to not do I end up doing? I need to stop doing that. Ok, no more doing what I told myself to not do. That’s not going to happen. UGH, I DID IT AGAIN!” This came out in a breathless rush, lasting for about ten seconds. Rainbow Dash and Derpy were looking at me with blank stares. Or, at least Rainbow Dash was. One of Derpy’s eyes had found an apparent interest with the tree branch currently residing above my head. Oh, ponyfeathers I thought, and I hastily moved out of the way. Only now did I realize that I didn’t see the TARDIS. What the hay? It was parked here, I swear! How the hay do I ALWAYS lose a giant blue police box time traveling wibbly wobbly timey wimey machiney thingy? I've got to stop doing that. UGH I DID IT AGAIN. I realized Dash was talking, and I pulled myself out of my berating thoughts to catch what she was saying. "Uh, is this where the TARDIS is supposed to be? Because if so, you did a REALLY good job at hiding it..." "Yeah. Heh heh. We apparently have a slight problem. It seems to be that I have temporarily misplaced the TARDIS..." Derpy pointed one of her eyes at me, the other one facing the sky. She had an incredulous look upon her face. "You... lost the TARDIS? YOU LOST THE TARDIS!?" "I DID NOT LOSE THE TARDIS. I TEMPORARILY MISPLACED IT. THERE IS A DIFFERENCE." I shouted back, trying to pull together what remains of dignity I had left. I was a pony, had been totally smushed by three young fillies, whacked in the head half a dozen times, and lost my only means of transportation which looks like a police box. In a forest. I was not having a good day. "You lost it." Dash replied flatly. "Did not. I misplaced it." "No, you LOST it." "Did not." "Did too." "Did not." "Did too." "Did NOT." "Did TOO." "DID NOT." "DID TOO." "WOULD YOU BOTH JUST SHUT UP!" Derpy pulled us out of our quarrel. Fine then, be that way. I was gonna win, anyways. It was only a matter of time. Ugh, never mind. I started running around the clearing, looking for any telltale signs of the TARDIS. "But I swear, it was right h-" I smashed into something and crashed into the dirt. Lucky for me, my face took the hit. Again. Awesome. I looked up from my position on the ground, and saw nothing in front of me. When I stood back up, I started walking forwards. I hit a barrier. I'm not even going to say what I hit first, I think that's pretty self explanatory by this point. I held my hooves up, and leaned forwards. I stopped moving, and a wide grin spread across my face. "SEE? Temporarily misplaced. I found it..." "Ok, why did you leave it in invisibility mode when you left exactly?" Derpy asked, walking around my TARDIS and feeling the invisible walls. Rainbow Dash was busy looking awed at my invisible TARDIS. Dunno why though. I mean, you can't even see her. She's... invisible. An invisible box. An invisible police box. An invisible blue police box. An invisible time traveling blue police box. An invi- ok, I'm done. I was busy looking for the key when I realized something. All of my clothes are still in the TARDIS. Including my key. Okay, no problem. I'll just snap, and it'll op- no fingers. No worries, I can just look behind the pull to open sign for the key I hi- the key in my jacket was the emergency key. Oh wait, what about behind the big P in the word POLICE on the top? Empty. Crud. I was locked out of my invisible TARDIS. Derpy had been watching me the entire time, seeing as I went through all the possible possibilities of a key floating around somewhere. "You lost the key, didn't you?" "I did NOT lose the key... I temporarily misplaced it..." Rainbow Dash rolled her eyes. "So... what are we going to do about it?" Huh, they said we. That was new. Usually it took a while to get people on board. Maybe ponies were different. "Ok, since I changed, and the TARDIS controls changed, and the sonic changed, and- ok, since basically everything changed, that means that there must be an alternate way that parodies snapping as a pony that will open the TARDIS." I thought out loud. I tried stomping my hooves, clapping them together, flapping my ears (it made kind of a snappy sound), flicking my tail. Nothing. Even sonic-ing it didn't work. It stayed invisible and as indestructible as ever. Frustrated, I shouted out, "ALOHOMORA!" Because I couldn't think of anything else to do, I was out of ideas for the time being. I heard a clicking noise, and I saw a sliver of orange-y light pop out from an invisible surface. Wait, my TARDIS now opens up to Harry Potter spells? I could get used to that. "HAHA! Got it! Good ole J.K.!" I said happily, finally able to enter inside my home. Derpy slowly walked in, and a second later, was crumpled to the floor of my TARDIS as Rainbow Dash flew in above her and knocked her over. Rainbow ceased all forms of motion, a look of astonishment freezing on her face. Then she keeled backwards, and I vaguely heard a goat bleating somewhere off in the distance. Ah well, nothing I haven't seen before, taking notice of her placement on the floor. Derpy was far more cautious in entering. She stepped in carefully after recovering from Dash's unintentional attack, a look of wonder on her face. It looked especially odd because of her eyes. I trotted up to the scanner (which doubled as a type of computer) and started typing in random key words. Hmmm, I don't suppose I could Yahoo Answers! this... I instead searched up "colorful ponies". All sorts of things popped up. Most of them were old action figures, from a series I remembered was called, "My Little Pony." Nothing I recognized however. I was just about to search up the names of the ponies that I had met when I scrolled down and found a photo of a group of pony friends. Three of which looked very familiar. I quickly clicked on the photo, and sure enough, Rainbow Dash, Pinkie Pie, and Fluttershy were there looking happy along with three other ponies and a small dragon. I was really weirded out now. Derpy and Rainbow Dash (now awakened) were too occupied looking around the TARDIS and going into the closer hallways, content to leave me alone for the time being. As I scrolled through the page that held the photo, it mentioned a TV show called "Friendship is Magic". I quickly searched that term up, and I couldn't believe what I saw. Apparently, Rainbow Dash, Fluttershy, Pinkie Pie, and their friends were from an earth TV show. What. The. Hay? My mind was reeling. I spent the next hour finding out everything I could about the TV show, even watching parts of episodes. I learned of the sonic rainboom, cupcakes, dragons, manticores, and most importantly, the Elements of Harmony. Also, I learned that there really was a Princess Celestia and a Princess Luna. I didn't think I was being tricked. No one would go through this much just for a joke. Seeing nothing of Derpy in the research, I searched up her name. Apparently she was a "background pony" and showed up randomly in the show. I couldn't believe it. They were on TV and they didn't even tell me? I abandoned my research and ran to go and find them, wherever they were in the TARDIS. I was lucky, they were in one of the first places I looked, the swimming pool in the library. I slammed the door open, and they stopped examining everything and froze at the look on my face. "Why didn't either of you tell me you were on TV?" My voice was deadly quiet. "What?" Rainbow Dash said, looking genuinely confused. I quickly told them everything that I had learned, growing louder with each sentence. As I finished, they sat in silence. Then they ran over towards the general direction of the control room. I ran ahead of them so that they wouldn't get lost and showed them the scanner with all of the information. "So you mean we've been filmed for our entire lives? And we never even knew?" Rainbow Dash asked in a quiet voice. "I don't get it. Why?" Derpy asked, looking at me. "How should I know? I didn't know I was being filmed and had my own TV show. Apparently you guys do too." "Wait, so then does that mean that we're being filmed right now, at this very moment?" Rainbow asked, looking around as if trying to find a hidden camera. "I don't know, but if they are, then we all need to act extremely clever to get rid of them. I don't want people watching my every move." "Wait, so then, if they film us, and they also film you, what TV show would this be on if it ever went on TV?" Derpy asked, one eye looking at me, the other one roaming around looking for something lurking in the shadows. "I have no idea. But we need to be careful. I don't know who's watching us." I said quietly, whispering to my companions. I was already thinking of them like that. Funny how things turn out. Everypony was silent for a moment, afraid to speak for the time being. It didn't last for long however. Suddenly, the phone started ringing. I shook myself out of my thoughts and went to go and answer it. Bad idea. As soon as I had done that a wave of darkness swept over me, and was instantly gone. The feeling was still there though, something bad was watching us. "Um, hello?" "Hello Doctor. We have been expecting you to enter our world. We just never knew it would be so soon." A raspy voice sounded from the phone. "What do you mean, 'You've been expecting me?' Who are you? How did you know this?" "Now now, Doctor, if we told you, it wouldn't be a surprise, would it?" "What do you mean a surprise?" The voice made a sound of disappointment. "We do not answer to you. We like your new friends though. Let's see. Miss Rainbow Dash and Miss Derpy Hooves? What a pleasure to meet you." They gasped. "How do you know who we are?" Rainbow Dash demanded. Flying over to the phone. "We have our ways. After all, we have been watching you for many years. You will be meeting us soon enough. When we take something that is very dear to you away. And it will be especially heartbreaking when you realize that you didn't even know we had it." None of knew what to say, I was too busy thinking to respond. Fortunately, the weird thing on the other side of the phone was perfectly content with talking about itself. I was lucky, it was inexperienced, it was telling us all about it without us having to figure it out. I opened my mouth, about to ask them what they were, when they started talking before I could. "We are creatures of the shadows, Doctor, to answer the question that was about to be asked. Count the shadows Doctor, remember that? We are not them though, cousins perhaps. What you faced then is nothing compared to us. We will overcome anything you will throw at us. After all, we were just waiting for the perfect opportunity." A laugh came through the telephone. I saw something dark slink from the receiver to the ground, stopping underneath the console. Rainbow Dash bent down to go and take a closer look, and I pulled her back. "Don't step in the shadows!" "You catch on quickly Doctor. Be thankful for that. Now remember, we are in your midsts. Watch where you step Doctor, one wrong move could give you up. We could get you right now, but where's the fun in that? Let's play a game Doctor. You get to go first. We eagerly await your next move." The voice stopped talking, and I heard the sound of a phone being hung up. I learned then that stony silence can be pretty noisy The Shadows Hold the AnswersHeh, sorry about that guys. I thought I posted this chapter but apparently I didn't... ANYWAYS... here ya go. Oh, and about Dinky. I made her Derpy's sister because I thought that Derpy's personality and age (according to my story, at least) would not have allowed her to have a kid at the moment... I stared at the phone reciever, along with the two ponies on opposite sides of me. The buzzing noise of the phone brought me back out of my thoughts, and I put it back on the holster with a rather skillful flip. Using my mouth of course. Maybe when I turned human again, my mouth would be just as handy. Then I realized how it might taste. Or look. Ugh, no one will EVER take me seriously ever again. As though they do now... STOP GOING OFF ON RANDOM TANGEANTS. I THOUGHT WE WENT OVER THIS I shook my head, and snapped out of my trance. "Okay, um, that was kind of strange. Luckily, they're the kind of folk who blurt out their plans to everypony. That's good. Awesome. Right-o. But, I can't say everything out loud. As far as we know, they could be watching us right now. That's bad. I vote we all speak in sign language. I also vote that the Doctor's vote counts for five votes. Only I am clever enough to get five votes. So all in favor of sign language, say I. I. Awesome, five for me." Derpy and Dash stared at me. "You two aren't speaking. Okay, that's cool too. You catch on fast. Sign language wins." I held up my hoof, and remembered that my fingers were out of order. "Ok, just kidding. Forget sign language. Anyone know Gallifreyan? Of course you don't, that was a stupid question. Raxicoricofallapatorian? Ood? Judoon?" "Ooh, say that second one again. The raxifalapatory thingy. That one sounds funny." Rainbow Dash said, obviously not seeing the whole picture. "RAXICORICOFALLAPATORIAN! Ugh, ummmmm... Are you both fluent in Pig Latin? That's an Earth language." "orta-say." Derpy replied, but it took her a couple of seconds. "What the heck is pig latin?" Rainbow Dash asked. I groaned. "Okay fine, we'll just stick with Equestrian for now. Learn Pig Latin. It's a useful skill... Oh, what am I thinking?! Of course they can understand whatever language we speak. That entire conversation never happened as of now." h They stared at me. Again. "Ok, we need to figure out why they are here. What their motive are, their goals, the reason. Have either of you two seen anything strange or out of the ordinary in Ponyville lately? It doesn't matter how small, anything." Rainbow Dash spoke up. "Not really. Ummmmmm, well my friend Applejack left for Manehattan a couple days ago. She wouldn't tell any of us why, or how long she was going to be gone. Maybe we could go and check Sweet Apple Acres and see if she's back yet?" I thought for a moment. That's it? That's all that's out of ordinary? Ponyville really was a boring town. "Okay, why not. But who's Applejack? Why is it so strange that she left?" We left the TARDIS in it's invisible state (difficult to explain if it was suddenly stumbled upon) and galloped over to Sweet Apple Acres, wherever that was. As I ran and they flew, Rainbow Dash gave me a few basic details on Applejack. Her coloring, cutie mark, Element of Honesty, all that stuff. I also learned that Apple Bloom was her younger sister. As we ran far past Ponyville and onto a dirt road leading out into a grove of apple trees far away, I asked, "So why is it so strange that she left for Manehattan?" "Because she hates Manehattan. She went there when she was a little filly and couldn't stand the city life. So she came back to Ponyville and found her calling as an apple bucker." Derpy said. "Wait, how do you know so much about Applejack, Derpy?" Rainbow was confused. "Dinky told me. Apparently Applejack came in to talk about cutie marks for Miss Cheerilee's class." "Who's Dinky?" I asked. "She's my younger sister. Unicorn. We still can't figure out how that happened, what with mom and dad both being pegasi..." I saw the apple trees getting closer in my field of vision. As far as I could tell, it was a massive apple farm, with a big red barn and a smaller house in one section and tons of apple trees taking up the surrounding area. I followed Rainbow Dash and Derpy as they flew out to a section of the orchard that contained a red stallion hitting the apple trees with his hind legs. He waved as Derpy came up to him, and gave Dash no acknowledgement whatsoever. "Big Mac, is Applejack back yet?" Derpy asked, landing on the ground. Rainbow opted to stay skybound. "Eeyup." He said, and walked to the next tree. "Well, could you tell us where she is?" Dash asked. "... Eeynope." "... what do you mean 'eeynope'?! WHERE IS SHE?" Dash asked, obviously annoyed. Silence. Big Mac bucked the tree and the apples came raining down, one catching Dash on the head before falling into the bucket. "Tell us where she is!" Derpy asked, trying to get Dash to calm down. Big Mac pointedly looked at Rainbow Dash, then went to collect the buckets of apples. "Why are you looking at me like th- wait a minute. This isn't about the prank I pulled on you yesterday, is it?" "Eeyup." Big Mac turned and showed us a bandage on his flank. "I apologized! It's not my fault the party cannon went crazy. Although, it was kinda funny when it turned on you and then..." She blushed and stopped talking. "Anyways, PLEASE JUST TELL US WHERE APPLEJACK IS!" Silence again. "Now, what is all of this nonsense about? Good afternoon, Rainbow and Derpy. It is so nice to see you again!" An unfamiliar voice sounded behind us, and we all turned, with the exception of Big Mac, who had apparently lost interest in us and moved on to the next tree. Here was a strange pony with an orange coat and a yellow mane all tied up in curls. She had on a fancy looking dress, which seemed kind of strange considering we were out in a dusty old farm in a tiny town... "... Applejack? What the hay happened to you?! Why do you sound so... weird?" Rainbow Dash was appalled, inspecting the apparent "Applejack" from all angles. Wait, this is Applejack? She is not at all like what Dash told me... "What do you mean? This is how I have always talked, is that not true?" Applejack replied, a confused look on her face. "Well... you sound like a Manehattanite. What happened to your accent?" Derpy asked, circling Applejack. "What accent? I don't have an accent! This is how I have always talked!" Applejack said, her eyes nervously scanning our faces. "And who is this young fellow?" Ha, young fellow. 906 years old and still a young fellow. "I'm John Smith. Pleased to meet you, I guess?" I was still at a loss, this is not at all how Applejack sounded. The way Rainbow Dash spoke about her, she was a rough and tumble country girl who loved competing and never lied. In front of me was a posh and well put together mare who seemed as though she would shriek if a speck of dirt ever got onto her coat. Ok, this is really weird... The late afternoon sun cast long shadows across the ground, making Big Mac's, Rainbow Dash's, Derpy's, and my shadows twice as long as normal. It just looked so cool! I love that. It's like I'm a giant or something. Or a cyberman. Ooh, I wonder what a cyberman's shadow would look like. That would be cool. Or what abo- I THOUGHT WE WENT OVER THIS. NO. RANDOM. TANGEANTS. Rainbow Dash was still arguing with Applejack about her new look and voice, while Derpy just looked confused. I walked over to Big Mac, who had moved to the next trees about twenty feet away. "Sooo... what was all that about a prank and a party cannon?" Big Mac blushed, and muttered a few things under his breath. "stupid... pinkie... streamers... banana..." Okayyyy thennnnnn. I'll find out from Rainbow Dash later. "Um, this is probably a weird question, considering the fact that I've never actually met Applejack until now, but is she a little... off?" He looked at me and sighed. "She came back from Manehattan like that. Couldn't change 'er mind about who she was. Just kept on talkin' about how she was always like this and dressed like that. We stopped tryin' to convince 'er otherwise a few days ago, but she wouldn't listen. So... eeyup. She's way off..." I blinked. Huh, I thought he could only say eeyup and eeynope. Apparently he had a bigger vocabulary than I had originally thought. Also, he had a strong country drawl. Come to think of it, so did Apple Bloom. So that must mean she also has a strong accent. So why is she talking like that? I looked back over in the direction of the three mares. Does this have something to do with the things on the phone? It's possible... Suddenly, something clicked in my head. I looked back to the ground, taking notice of all of our shadows. They were all still twice as tall as the owners. Except for one.
Strange SightsExplosions wracked the air around me as I frantically tried to restart the TARDIS mid-regeneration. "Come on, come on, come on! Why won't you work! You and me, I thought you were supposed to take me to where I needed to go! Start working! Now!" I stumbled around the console, desperately trying to sonic anything that could be moderately helpful. Just a few minutes before, a stray Adipose had found its way into the time rotor, by means of which I do not know. It promptly exploded, rupturing the rotor mid-time travel, which then broke a few parts of the console, also throwing me against the wall, starting my regeneration cycle. Lights were flashing, alarms going, pieces of the TARDIS sparking with electricity and then going silent, fried beyond use. Unfortunately for me, the parts of the TARDIS that had exploded along with the rotor were the ones that I desparately needed to stop the TARDIS in whatever galaxy it was currently traveling to. I felt myself weakening, and I started seeing the glow surround my hands. "No! Just a few more minutes! Let me figure this out before everything goes completely wibbly wobbly timey wimey!" I started seeing the glow in the corner of my eyes, signifying that it had started around my head and everywhere around my body. I lost myself in the glow, and it took over my body, changing it into whatever form it would take on next. As though my day couldn't get any worse, my own personal explosion only sent the TARDIS into a part of the Universe I had never been too, where it crash landed in a place I had never seen, or even heard of for that matter. As my body reformed, I felt my senses coming back to me, slowly but surely. I raised my hand to get a good look at my new body, when I noticed a piece of the TARDIS falling from the ceiling, heading straight for my face. "Holy sh-" Was all I managed before I blacked out once again. ***** "Wait, WHAT! THEY LEAVE THE EPISODE LIKE THAT! WORST. ENDING. EVER! WE DIDN'T EVEN GET TO SEE HIS NEW FACE!" A loud, scratchy voice pulled the other pony back out of her state of disbelief. "I didn't even think they could end something that terribly. BOO DOCTOR WHO!" Derpy said, throwing the popcorn she and Dash had found in Dash's cloud home at the screen. Rainbow Dash and Derpy had just finished watching the latest episode of "Doctor Who", and neither of them could be more distressed about the ending. Derpy had discovered Dash was a Doctor Who fan when she had caught Dash watching the episodes from outside of Derpy's window. No doubt Rainbow had a fascination with the one show on television that featured humans, and even though nopony knew, Dash was actually a big fan of science fiction. Rainbow had denied ever watching the show when Derpy confronted her about it, even saying that she wouldn't spend her time on something so boring. Derpy then invited Dash to come and watch it with her for once then, and Rainbow gave away her cover when she accidentally named all the characters and the monsters in the episode. Now the two of them had a weekly get together to watch the latest episodes, and discuss what could happen next. Derpy was happy that Dash had finally stopped making fun of her eyes, now that they were friends. She was even giving Derpy lessons to help correct her eyes, so that nopony else teased her about them. Derpy could see enough of the television to see the worst ending of an episode EVER. Neither one of them had been prepared for not even being able to see the newest face of the Doctor. "When does the next season come out again?" Rainbow asked, finally getting over her indignation. Derpy sighed, "Next fall. We have an entire year to wait to see his new look." Rainbow was just about to reply when they both heard a huge BOOM coming from outside. They rushed to the door of the cloud home just in time to see a fireball coming down from the sky and landing deep in the Everfree forest. "What the hay was that?!" Dash exclaimed, getting ready to hop of the cloud and investigate the crash site. Derpy grabbed her tail right as she was about to take off. It took her two tries to get the right tail of the two that were dancing in front of her crossed eyes. "Are you crazy! It's dark! THE EVERFREE FOREST! We are NOT going in there tonight. Who knows what's out there?! And we are not going to wake Fluttershy up to stare down any manticores or cockatrices in there for us, ok? We'll go first thing tomorrow!" "Ugh, fine" Rainbow replied. "But we are going early, I wanna see what that was, and it could be gone tomorrow!" "Ok, whatever. Meet me at the entrance tomorrow at 8. We'll find whatever that thing was. See ya tomorrow, Dash" Derpy lept off the cloud and flew to her own home, excited at what the fireball actually was, and how she would be finding out early tomorrow.
When I Wake UpI awoke with a groan, the ceiling swimming above me in a way I was 90 percent sure was NOT supposed to happen. The top of the TARDIS slowly came into focus, the events prior to my current predicament still a haze. My head was aching in a way I was 100 percent sure was not supposed to happen. Ok... time rotor...explosion...regeneration... blackout...wait, regeneration. REGENERATION. I sat up quickly and my headache became my primary concern for the moment. Ok, not a good idea to sit up super fast after you have just been knocked out. I grasped my head with my hands and I heard a dull clopping sound. Wait a second, I am fairly certain my head has NEVER made that noise. I looked at my hands to make sure there wasn't anything on them that could have caused the strange noise. I stared at my hands, eyes widening when I realized that they no longer took on the appearance of the ten fingers and palms I have known for the past 909 years. Wait, hooves? When did that happen? I had never regenerated into anything that didn't take on a human like appearance. What the hell? I took on my usual post regeneration routine, quickly starting to inspect different aspects of my physical appearance and making sure nothing had been left out. Ears. Short and furry, and in a different place than I expected, but check. Eyes, check. Nose, what the heck? It's never been this big before. Ugh, I must be a mutant, no one will EVER be able to take me seriously now. Hair, shaggy, and from what I can see of it, dark brown. That's it, I need to look in the mirror. I stood up on my legs and promptly fell over. What, can I no longer walk on two legs now? I decided to go for the dog style and walk on all fours over to the mirror. This is humiliating. My feet made a clop sound as they progressed over to the other side of the TARDIS, the entire time I was thinking, Ok, it can't be that bad! I mean, I have weird feet and stuff, but that won't change much... will it? Oh god, will I even be able to work the TARDIS? Am I stuck here forever!? I'm screwed! I looked in the mirror, and stared at my new form. I'M A PONY!? Wait, what the hell? This has NEVER happened to another time lord as far as I'm concerned. What do I do? Why the hell am I a pony! I can't be a pony! I'm the Doctor! I went over all the possible scenarios in my head, and the most logical response I came up with was when the TARDIS was exploding, it started traveling through all the alternate universes, and when I regenerated, it forced the TARDIS into emergency lock down and landed in the closest galaxy. Therefore, I regenerated into whatever life form lived here, so a...pony. Ok, this is officially crazy. Ugh, I'm never going to live this one down. I noticed a spot of color on my flank, and turned sideways at the mirror. An hourglass was on my butt. Ok, what does that even mean? I don't even...ok, whatever. I'll figure it out later. I turned towards the console. Wait a second, can I still work the TARDIS? I unstably ran (more like an attempted gallop) over to the console and looked it over. Apparently when it had crashed in a different universe, the TARDIS itself had also regenerated, changing the switches and levers to shapes and sizes that were far more compatible with my hooves. My hooves. I shook my head to stop thinking about them, and tried flipping switches to get out of this universe. It was going to burn up a lot of power, but it would be worth it when I was in my normal form. The TARDIS started up, and the new time rotor started going up and down. I heard a sound that I hated hearing, the systems failing. The time rotor stopped working. What the hell? "Oh, common dear, let's go! What, can you not leave this galaxy? Oh god, please tell me you can still leave this galaxy." No matter what I did, the TARDIS would not start up enough to leave the universe. I looked up on the scanner, trying to figure out which planet I was on. Everfree Forest, Equestria. Also known as an alternate form of Earth. Wherever that was, I had never even heard of the Everfree Forest and Equestria. I tried for some places that I did know might be here, in this time period. First stop, the moon. Ok, so the TARDIS still works. I figured, after stepping out of the TARDIS onto the bare landscape full of concave dents and dust. I trotted around, making sure this wasn't just a totally random place. I spotted a bit of color coming from the corner of my eye. I looked around and ran towards it, stopping when I saw a bed, mini roller coaster, giant refrigerator, and lots of toys. Wait, someone lived here on the moon? Judging by how old the toys were, this person (or pony, for that matter) had been here for a long time. Ah well, it looks like they have left already, the bed was full of dust and the toys lying in pathetic heaps on the surface of the moon. I went back into the TARDIS to try and see other places that I knew of. Ok, this was officially mind blowing. Not only was everything, basically the same, it was all pony-fied and strange! Camelot was Canterlot, Philadelphia was Fillydelphia, Manhattan was Manehattan, and everyone was a pony! Ugh, this was way to strange for my post regeneration brain to handle. I stepped out of the TARDIS to look at my surroundings, and maybe meet some ponies that could try and help me to make sense out of all of this. ***** Derpy's first view of the next morning was of her carpet. She flipped over and looked up, surprised at the seconds ago short moment of free fall before landing on the floor next to her bed. Rainbow Dash was hovering in her face, an excited and slightly mischievious grin taking over her features. Derpy groaned and threw a pillow at Dash. "Derpy! The fireball! Come. On! Get your flank off the ground and let's go to the Everfree forest!" Derpy shot up, the events of last night finally catching up to her. Wide awake, she nodded to Rainbow, and they promptly shot out of the window of Derpy's home and created two blurs that crossed over Ponyville, one yellow and gray, the other rainbow. They stopped just outside of the Everfree forest. Just because they had both been inside lots of times, it was still a place full of Manticores and other beasts lurking in the shadows. They looked at each other and nodded, and quickly traversed into the forest, eager to discover what had fallen from the sky late the previous night. ***** A few hours later, they still hadn't discovered the site of the crash. Derpy's wings were getting tired, and as much as Rainbow Dash tried to deny it, hers ached a little too. They were just starting to get discouraged, when a light brown earth pony stumbled through the undergrowth. He had a short brown shaggy mane, a light brown body, blue eyes, and an hourglass cutie mark. He looked incredibly confused. "Uh, you ok there? You look a little lost. What the hay are you doing out here in the Everfree forest?" The flying pony with the rainbow mane asked me, a little wary, I could see it. "Long story, don't ask. And even if you did, I wouldn't know what to tell you. My TA-... form of transportation crashed late last night, and I just woke up. May I ask your names? And what you are doing out here?" Woah, he talks really fast. And he sounds really familiar... Derpy thought. "Uh, I'm Derpy, and that's Rainbow Dash." Rainbow Dash gave a little salute at the mention of her name. "We saw something fall out of the sky late yesterday, and we decided to go investigate." I panicked, I can't let them know I'm a time traveler, not even from this galaxy for that matter. "Yeah, strange... I have no idea what that crash was, I mean, it wasn't me. How could it be me? My TA- form of transportation can't fly! Haha weird." A silence befell the three of us as they tried to work out what I said. "Yeah, um, so, can you show me the way out of this place? And show me where the nearest civilization is? That'dbegreatthanks." I finished talking in a rush. The rainbow maned pegasus looked at me curiously, and a look of realization and curiosity found its way onto her face. "Sure thing..." She said cautiously. "But don't get any funny ideas, there's something you're not telling us." Shoot, she was perceptive. I gulped, and followed them as they turned and started leading the way (hopefully out of the forest). I made note of all the twists and turns they made, hoping to find my way back to the TARDIS later. They were whispering furiously to each other. The thought I was currently pondering over was along the lines of, were all ponies like this?
Ok, Now I'm Really ConfusedThe two pegasi kept whispering in front of me, every couple of minutes they would turn around and glance at me. It was starting to get kind of creepy. I could only catch little snippets of their conversation, hearing words like, "weird, cutie mark, comet, show, trust, muffins" that sort of thing. If you can even guess what their chat was about. I sure as hell couldn't. "What are they talking about?" I thought. They turned back to look at me again. "You." The rainbow one said bluntly. I realized I had said that out loud. "Heh, sorry. Carry on." I felt my cheeks heating up. Do ponies blush? Does it just turn a darker shade of their coat, or is it red like humans? What if there is a red pony who blushes, does it even show up? I kept inching my way through the forest, how do you even walk with these things?! I wondered if I could manipulate my brain with my sonic, so that walking on all fours came naturally to me. SONIC SCREWDRIVER! WHERE IS IT?! I frantically searched all over me, running my hooves through my mane and tail in the small chance it had gotten there. Ah well, it was probably back in the TARDIS. To take my mind off things, I decided to study the two pegasi in front of me. Rainbow Dash was flying gracefully and in a straight line, whilst Derpy was constantly leaning to one side and going every which way. Somehow, she still managed to stay upright. I guess it kinda worked. She had an image of seven bubbles on her flank, and I thought back to my own hourglass. Rainbow Dash had a tri colored lightning bolt. I guess everypony has one. I wonder what it actually means? I thought about how useful it would be to just fly over all the roots and creepers trying to give my face an introduction to the ground. They looked back at me one last time, and flew over so that they were hovering only a few feet above my heads, on both sides of me. "So, where are you from?" Derpy, asked. I looked up at her, and noticed her eyes were facing different directions. Huh, well that would explain her flying skills. "Um, Canterlot?" I replied, recalling one of the places I had seen on the map in the TARDIS. "Huh..." Rainbow Dash said absentmindedly, lazily flitting about over my head. " So you know the princesses then?" "Princesses?" They stared at me. "Princess Celestia and Luna? They only run the entire land of Equestria and raise and lower the sun and moon? What, do you live under a rock?! You can't really live in Canterlot and not know them." Rainbow Dash said. "OH. You mean those Princesses. Of course I know them! It was just a... clarifying question." "Doesn't Princess Celestia do such a good job at raising the moon? And the Wonderbolts did such a good job at banishing Nightmare Moon, don't ya think?" Derpy gushed, glancing at Rainbow Dash with one of her eyes, the other one focusing on who knows what. "...yeah, the Wonderbolts were spectacular at that. And Princess Celestia does an amazing job at raising the moon!" I said, hoping they fell for it. Dash looked at Derpy, and then narrowed her eyes at me. She looked like she was just about to ask me a question when the trees stopped, and I was looking out on a small cottage right along the edge of the trees. Yes! Finally out of the forest. I looked back, and shuddered. I just came out of that? Ah well, I wonder who lives here in the cottage. Might as well get to know everypony, it looks like I'll be stuck here for a while. Hold on, I thought everypony instead of everybody. What is happening to me!? Just then another pegasus came out from behind the cottage, with a basket of carrots hanging in her mouth. She was tall and skinny, with a long pink mane and a yellow body. I looked at her flank. Yep, three butterflies. What does the mark even mean?! Also, am I the only pony with no wings? It was kinda starting to seem that way. " Hey Fluttershy!" Rainbow Dash yelled. The yellow pegasus squeaked and dropped her basket. Rainbow Dash rolled her eyes and flew over to the pink and yellow heap cowering on the ground. "It's me, Dash. You can stop hiding now... We brought a colt who Derpy and I think you should meet. His name is... wait, we never got your name. What's your name?" " Um, John Smith!" I said quickly, using the pseudonym I always used. Before I came here to Equestria, that was a perfectly normal name. Here however, in a place filled with names like Rainbow Dash, Derpy, Fluttershy, Celestia, and Luna, I wasn't so sure. Ah well, it will add to the illusion of me being a foreigner. Fluttershy looked up and blushed. "Oh, hi Rainbow Dash." Or at least that's what I assume she said. From where I was, it sounded like, "oh, hmm, rmammmowahhmmm" Rainbow flew back over to me. "That's Fluttershy. We're still working on her outside voice." I walked up to her, and said, "Hi!" She scuffed the ground with her hoof, hiding behind her long mane. I wondered if I would ever get to see her full face. "um... hi." She said, then she squeaked. "Um, it was nice meeting you..." She went silent. Considering I knew every language spoken everywhere, it was quite a surprise when I realized I don't know how to speak "mumble". Apparently, Fluttershy was completely fluent in that language. There was an awkward silence that was broken only by Dash and Derpy's best attempts to not laugh out loud at my social abilities. I looked around, and tried to start a conversation. "...so, you like animals?" Her head snapped up, and I finally saw her face. She was actually quite pretty. "Oh yes! I love animals and taking care of them, and helping them to be the best they can be. It's my special talent, you know. I got my cutie mark for it!" Ok, so now I know she can actually form sentences. This is good. But what is a cutie mark? Also, her voice was pretty cute. "Cool! I can see they really like you too!" Awkward silence filled the air once again. Dash decided to be nice and stepped in for us, "Sorry Fluttershy, we really need to get going and do... stuff. See ya!" "Good bye!" Fluttershy said, now much louder and not as mumbly. Derpy waved to her and we started walking towards the town in the distance. "Wait, where are we going again?" I asked, kind of confused. "Places, I need to show you something..." Derpy said, glancing at Rainbow Dash, who nodded. "Um, ok?" I continued walking behind the pegasi when I noticed a small cloud of dust far away, coming up the path I was walking on. "RAINBOWWWWWWWWWWWW!" The rapidly increasing in size dust cloud yelled. I could make out the colors purple and orange speeding towards me. A glint of blue and red underneath. A bike or something? A scooter! "Oh no, SQUIRT! WATCH OUT FOR JO-" *SMASH* The last thing I heard before I blacked out for the second time that day was "CUTIE MARK CRUSADERS PONY SMASHERS YAY!"
My Sonic Screwdriver in Ponyville?" Scootaloo, what the hay! I thought you had stopped bowling ponies over!" "It was an accident! He got in my way! It's not my fault!" "Is he dead?" "Lemme help him, maybe ah can get mah cutie mark in healin' stuff!" "Um, girls? Give him space. You kind of just knocked him out. Besides, I think he's waking up." I opened my eyes, hazily taking in the view above me. Orange, white, and yellow filled up my vision, fuzzy blobs of color that I couldn't name even if I tried. As my vision cleared, I saw three, younger looking ponies looking down at me, invading a little more than what was comfortable of my personal space. I jumped, and sat up quickly, and collided heads with all three ponies. Huh, that's a new one. I thought, grasping my aching head. The three young fillies were sitting in a line, expressions ranging from curious to sheepish to guilt. All of them were rubbing their heads like I was. I quickly examined their flanks. No mark. Wait, what? Now I didn't even know what to think. I guess it was some wacked up version of pony maturity. We stared at each other for a few seconds, before Rainbow Dash sighed and said, "What is it with you and awkward introductions? You can't talk when meeting someone, but then you can't shut up once you get started! Anyways, meet the cutie mark crusaders." "Ah'm Apple Bloom!" The yellow one with the red mane and pink bow told me with a cute southern accent. "Scootaloo!" That one saluted, and I noticed her voice, mane style, and basic mannerism strongly parodied Rainbow Dash's. " And I'm Sweetie Belle!" The purple, pink, and white pony's voice cracked on her name, as she pounced in front of the others and flapped her arms. Ok, so she wants to be a bird. That's cool. "I'm John Smith". I said, standing back up on all fours. "That's a funny name!" Scootaloo looked at me, trying to change her face into a look of disbelief, the exact same face I saw Rainbow Dash doing a few seconds earlier. "Well, your name's Scootaloo. And I presume that is your scooter that crashed into me?" I remarked after noticing the blue scooter on it's side a few feet away, wheels still spinning. "Heh, yeah. I kind of lost control. It hasn't happened for a long time." "Wait, why are you called the Cutie Mark Crusaders?" I asked. This time Sweetie Belle spoke. "We're trying to find our special talents to get our cutie marks! It's taken a while though. We've tried ice skating, bowling, zip lining, candy making, baking, apple bucking..." I tuned her out for the better part of three minutes. "... swimming, lion taming, chimney sweeping, and just now, pony smashing! You never know when you might need to knock down a pony. We keep on trying new things!" "That's... cool. But why are you trying those things? Why not something you already know how to do?" "Cuz we don't think it'l lead to our special talents! And anyways, ah think that we would've figured them out already, if we knew what to do!" Apple Bloom said. Wow, her accent was really cute. Scootaloo examined my flank. "An hourglass cutie mark? How'd you get that?" OH. CUTIE MARK. *That's what it is. It makes so much more sense now.* Oh shoot, how did I get it? "Um, that's... classified? Only the coolest ponies can figure it out." "Well, I'm a cool pony! Let's see... you make hourglasses? Your special talent is being on time? Uh, you really like sand?" "How about none of the above?" Special talent. Ok, so cutie mark comes when you realize your special talent. Got it. "Ugh, well, I'm not giving up yet! I'm the second most coolest pony in Ponyville!" "So then, who's the coolest?" I heard a throat clearing, and Rainbow Dash striked a pose in mid air. "The one and only! Squirt here still needs to learn to watch where she's going. She'll never be as cool as me though, not in a MILLION years." "Wait, Scootaloo needs to watch where she's going? You crashed into the library yesterday. There's still a big hole that is, oddly enough, Rainbow Dash shaped." Derpy said, looking at Dash. Rainbow blushed. "Heh, yeah, still working on my landings. But Squirt here just knocked a pony down, on the ground, with her scooter, which could've easily been avoided. Therefore, your argument is invalid, and I win. MWAHAHA!" Derpy stared at Rainbow Dash. She opened her mouth as though to say something, and then shut it, giving up. "Whatever Dash, we still need to get John here over to my place, to show him the special thing, remember?" Rainbow nodded, and told the Cutie Mark Crusaders to go ask Fluttershy if they could help out with her animals again. Seeing the three of them tumble over to her cottage, I seriously doubted that the animals would live to see the next day. Fluttershy would have fun. We continued on our way back to... Ponyville? That's kind of a strange name. Ah well, at least I'll get to meet new ponies and stuff. I'll need to make as many friends as possible, because as long as I'm here, something is bound to go wrong, and having other peop-ponies to back you up is always nice. "How did you get here anyways?" Rainbow Dash pulled me out of my thoughts with a question. "I... walked. Then I got lost in the Everfree forest, and that's when I found you and Derpy." "You walked here from Canterlot? You do know that's way up there, right?" She pointed to a far away city/castle up on a mountain. Crud, I said I walked from there!? "Um, yeah. It took a while though, and-hey! We're here! So what's Ponyville like anyways? Are all ponies here like the Cutie Mark Crusaders and you two and Fluttershy? What do you do around here? Are there any male ponies? Wait, there has to be, or else how do you... never mind. Any good resturaunts? What do they have?" I tried to ask as many questions as possible to get Rainbow Dash off of the topic. "Um, Ponyville's great, no, weather patrol, yeah, no comment, sorta,... true?" Dash tried to remember my questions. She was close enough, not everyone can have a memory like mine. I looked around Ponyville, taking in all of the sites. It was a quaint little village, full of cute little houses buildings. One I noticed was shaped like a gingerbread house. Everywhere I turned, ponies stopped to look at me. Am I really that abnormal looking? Did my regeneration leave me looking super strange? I mean, I was the only male pony I've met so far, so I couldn't really go off of what females looked like. There were still no red ponies. I really wanted to try that blushing thing. We approached the gingerbread building, Derpy giving me little facts about the town and naming the ponies as we passed them. This pink pony started bouncing out of the building. Bouncing? How do you even do that? I was just making up my mind to try when I was alone in a place where no one could see me when the pink pony locked eyes with me. She had a light pink body, bright pink poofy mane, and blue eyes. Her cutie mark was three balloons. That was kind of- *GASP* She took me out of my thoughts as she jumped up into the sky. Ok, this pony was weird. Bouncing, and... flying? What the hay? "HI! I'm Pinkie Pie, what's your name? I know that you're new here, because I havn't seen you before, and I've seen everypony in Ponyville, because I know everypony! I should throw you a party! With gumdrops and streamers and sugar and balloons and confetti and- where did you come from? Did you drop out of the sky like SHOOM and then ran over here like WHOOSH! Do you like bananas? I know you like bananas. Bananas are good! Why aren't you wearing a bow tie? Or a fez? Oh, I just remembered! I had a present for you! I knew you were looking for it, so I kept track of it! Here you go!" She pulled my sonic screwdriver out of nowhere and tossed it at me. Wait, why does she have it? How does she know about my obsession with bananas, bow ties, and fezzes? WHAT "Um, thanks?" I said, as the screwdriver hit me in the face. I examined it closely, apparently the buttons were gone. Cool, how was I supposed to use it then? I guess its just all telepathic now. Also, how was I supposed to carry this thing? I looked around, and I noticed all the ponies who weren't unicorns carrying things in their mouths, or tucking it in their mane. I picked it up with my mouth, and promptly spit it back out. That tastes disgusting. I picked it up again and quickly put it behind my ear, out of sight. That's better. Now I have it and I don't have to taste it. "Wait, how did you get my sonic screwdriver?" I asked Pinkie Pie. Rainbow Dash and Derpy gasped, and then started whispering furiously to each other. When I turned back to face Pinkie Pie, she was gone. Wait, where did she go? Nopony can move that fa- "WHEEEEEEEEE!" A voice called out from above me, and I see Pinkie falling from a few feet above me. What the hay? How did she get up there? "How are you doing that? I am loving it! You're like, Houdini, only one slightly creepy pink pony and he was shorter, will be shorter. Anyways, how did you do that?" I started speaking to her, unintentionally matching her fast paced style of talking. "What do you mean? You just climb up the side of the invisible box, and then fall back down. Easy peasy icing squeezy!" I stared. You know what, I'm just going to add that to the ever growing list of things that I don't understand in this place. I blinked, and she was gone, bouncing and giggling fifty feet away from me. What is this- I don't even- UGH. Never mind. " That was Pinkie Pie. She's like the craziest pony here. You get used to her after a while." Rainbow Dash looked at me sympathetically. I didn't even know she could make that face, she just didn't seem like that type of pony. "Let's hope so. So where were you taking me again?" "Over to my home. Come on, we need to show you something." Derpy said, her and Dash already starting to fly away. I decided to follow them, because unfortunately, they were my best bet to actually understand anything in this town.
Well, That Went Well"So... this is where you live? And why exactly am I here?" I asked as we approached the small cottage on the other side of Ponyville. it was almost like Fluttershy's, except this one was much bigger and... for lack of better words, kind of muffin shaped. Ok then, that's cool. I've seen weirder. "Yeah, the thing I'm showing you, it's inside. Come on in!" Derpy said as she opened the door. I walked in, and my eyes widened. It was... normal. I thought something would be really crazy, or there be double of everything (you know, for her eyes. So if she tried to sit down or something, she would always end up on a chair) Rainbow flapped in and gracefully landed. I just realized that was the first time she had put her hooves on the ground since I met her. She locked the door behind me. Kinda creepy. Well, I had my sonic, so all was good. Rainbow blocked the door, and faced me with a determined look. I turned around to Derpy, and discovered she had the same facial expression. Ok, not good. They started to advance on me. What the hay, what the hay, what the hay!? Please don't let them have a secret lust for confused brown stallions! I stood my ground, and asked, "Heh, why are you coming towards me with a creepy expression? Why don't we all just work things out instead? Talking, that is the key to making friends and settling conflicts!" Derpy looked at me, and said, "Ok, just stop talking. We know who you are." What did they mean?! How could they?! I didn't even know this place existed, how could they know where I was from? Rainbow went over to the television in the corner and turned to a specific channel. There I was, in the TARDIS, trying to get rid of the Adipose that ruined my poor TARDIS. WHAT?! "Um, I don't know what you're talking about... why are you showing me this on the television?" Rainbow Dash spoke up, coming out from behind the television. "Uh, because you're the Doctor? And something happened, that pony-fied you? We don't know, all we do know is that the end of this episode ended with the TARDIS crashing and us not seeing the regenerated face, and then you show up all of a sudden with the same mannerisms and looks. And the sonic screwdriver, that was kind of a give away." I blinked. All I could think was, Crud, crud, crud, crud, crud, what do I do? I stuttered. "How do you know this is me? I mean there's no point in denying it, but how am I being filmed? I've never had ANY idea I was being watched..." Derpy shrieked and started twirling in mid air, going hazardly all over the room. "I KNEW IT! HA! HE IS THE DOCTOR! AND THAT EXPLOSION HAD TO BE THE TARDIS CRASHING! THIS IS SO EXCITING DASH!" Rainbow Dash was silent, looking at me with a slack jaw and a look of awe on her face. It was like she was about to start bowing to me and saying "I'm not worthy" or something. She spluttered, "But, you're you! And I mean I had a hunch and all but you actually admitting it? This is the best day ever! Oh pleasepleasepleasepleasepleaseeeee lemme take a ride in the TARDIS!" This was just too weird. How did they even know who I am? WHY IS MY EVERY MOVE BEING WATCHED ON THAT TELEVISION!? I could hardly think, what with Rainbow Dash looking at me like that and stuttering and Derpy still shrieking above me, constantly crashing into things. "Ok, could you both just CALM DOWN!" I shouted, trying to figure out my next move. It was like time had paused. They stopped moving all together and sat down, looking at me with this look in their eyes I had unfortunately come to know so well. Admiration. Ugh, how I hated that. Past regenerations may have liked the attention, but not me. Especially when all I was doing was talking and looking confused today. No more ignoring my questions, time to get them to listen. After all, they did hold me in some kind of respect, I could get them to listen for hopefully two minutes. If I'm lucky... "Ok. Answer every question I ask. With the truth. How did you know who I was?" "On the tv." They answered in unison. "We love the show Doctor Who, and we watch it every saturday. Then at the end of last night's episode, the TARDIS crashed and we never saw the regenerated you. Then we saw a comet coming out from the sky, and crashing in the Everfree forest. We went to investigate, and there you were." Derpy said, it all coming out in a breathless rush. I guess Pinkie Pie had unintentionally taught other ponies how to talk fast and without taking breaths. "Ok, I guess that makes sense. But why am I on television?" That question stumped them for a while, until Rainbow Dash said, "We dunno. It's the only human show that they show here in Equestria. All we know is that the guy from our favorite tv show crashes here in Equestria but pony-fied. I thought it was all scripted..." "Scripted? SCRIPTED? My life is NOT scripted. I've never been scripted in my life! And that's a long time." I answered, offended. Silence. "Ok, so... that's all the information we have?" I asked, looking at the two of them. They nodded. "Well then, that was not helpful at all. I've gotta get back to the TARDIS, maybe I can find answers there. She's never failed me yet, let's just hope she doesn't feel like this would be a good time for a first." I jumped up, and went over to the door. Still locked. Ok, time to figure out how this sonic screwdriver worked. I shook my mane and the screwdriver came tumbling out, and I caught it in midair. Ignoring the taste, I pointed it at the lock and focused. Nothing. Ugh, fine, be that way. I thought harder... I wonder... I bit down on a certain part of it, and focused on unlocking the door. The blue light that I had come to know so well lit up, along with that strange buzzing noise. The lock clicked open. Yeah, still got it. I ran out the door and looked back, seeing the two mares still sitting on the ground. "Aren't you coming?" They looked at me, and Rainbow Dash spoke. "Can we? I mean, we wouldn't want--... ok ya know what? We're going whether you like it or not. Come on Derpy, let's go and show the TARDIS who's boss." They both jumped up and followed me, and we ran back through the forest on the route that I had memorized. Huh, they could make good companions one day, just as soon as we figure this whole mess out.
Temporary MisplacmentWe burst into the clearing where I hid the TARDIS, and I skidded to a stop. Unfortunately, the mares behind me were not prepared for my quick stop, and they crashed into me and we promptly collided into a nearby tree. My face took most of the impact. I sat back, clutching my head with my hooves. “HOW MANY TIMES AM I GOING TO BE HIT IN THE HEAD TODAY? I mean, I just need to be more careful now... ok, that’s not going to happen, but the thought is nice. Ok, just stay away from hard surfaces... Ok that’s not going to happen either. Why does whatever I say to not do I end up doing? I need to stop doing that. Ok, no more doing what I told myself to not do. That’s not going to happen. UGH, I DID IT AGAIN!” This came out in a breathless rush, lasting for about ten seconds. Rainbow Dash and Derpy were looking at me with blank stares. Or, at least Rainbow Dash was. One of Derpy’s eyes had found an apparent interest with the tree branch currently residing above my head. Oh, ponyfeathers I thought, and I hastily moved out of the way. Only now did I realize that I didn’t see the TARDIS. What the hay? It was parked here, I swear! How the hay do I ALWAYS lose a giant blue police box time traveling wibbly wobbly timey wimey machiney thingy? I've got to stop doing that. UGH I DID IT AGAIN. I realized Dash was talking, and I pulled myself out of my berating thoughts to catch what she was saying. "Uh, is this where the TARDIS is supposed to be? Because if so, you did a REALLY good job at hiding it..." "Yeah. Heh heh. We apparently have a slight problem. It seems to be that I have temporarily misplaced the TARDIS..." Derpy pointed one of her eyes at me, the other one facing the sky. She had an incredulous look upon her face. "You... lost the TARDIS? YOU LOST THE TARDIS!?" "I DID NOT LOSE THE TARDIS. I TEMPORARILY MISPLACED IT. THERE IS A DIFFERENCE." I shouted back, trying to pull together what remains of dignity I had left. I was a pony, had been totally smushed by three young fillies, whacked in the head half a dozen times, and lost my only means of transportation which looks like a police box. In a forest. I was not having a good day. "You lost it." Dash replied flatly. "Did not. I misplaced it." "No, you LOST it." "Did not." "Did too." "Did not." "Did too." "Did NOT." "Did TOO." "DID NOT." "DID TOO." "WOULD YOU BOTH JUST SHUT UP!" Derpy pulled us out of our quarrel. Fine then, be that way. I was gonna win, anyways. It was only a matter of time. Ugh, never mind. I started running around the clearing, looking for any telltale signs of the TARDIS. "But I swear, it was right h-" I smashed into something and crashed into the dirt. Lucky for me, my face took the hit. Again. Awesome. I looked up from my position on the ground, and saw nothing in front of me. When I stood back up, I started walking forwards. I hit a barrier. I'm not even going to say what I hit first, I think that's pretty self explanatory by this point. I held my hooves up, and leaned forwards. I stopped moving, and a wide grin spread across my face. "SEE? Temporarily misplaced. I found it..." "Ok, why did you leave it in invisibility mode when you left exactly?" Derpy asked, walking around my TARDIS and feeling the invisible walls. Rainbow Dash was busy looking awed at my invisible TARDIS. Dunno why though. I mean, you can't even see her. She's... invisible. An invisible box. An invisible police box. An invisible blue police box. An invisible time traveling blue police box. An invi- ok, I'm done. I was busy looking for the key when I realized something. All of my clothes are still in the TARDIS. Including my key. Okay, no problem. I'll just snap, and it'll op- no fingers. No worries, I can just look behind the pull to open sign for the key I hi- the key in my jacket was the emergency key. Oh wait, what about behind the big P in the word POLICE on the top? Empty. Crud. I was locked out of my invisible TARDIS. Derpy had been watching me the entire time, seeing as I went through all the possible possibilities of a key floating around somewhere. "You lost the key, didn't you?" "I did NOT lose the key... I temporarily misplaced it..." Rainbow Dash rolled her eyes. "So... what are we going to do about it?" Huh, they said we. That was new. Usually it took a while to get people on board. Maybe ponies were different. "Ok, since I changed, and the TARDIS controls changed, and the sonic changed, and- ok, since basically everything changed, that means that there must be an alternate way that parodies snapping as a pony that will open the TARDIS." I thought out loud. I tried stomping my hooves, clapping them together, flapping my ears (it made kind of a snappy sound), flicking my tail. Nothing. Even sonic-ing it didn't work. It stayed invisible and as indestructible as ever. Frustrated, I shouted out, "ALOHOMORA!" Because I couldn't think of anything else to do, I was out of ideas for the time being. I heard a clicking noise, and I saw a sliver of orange-y light pop out from an invisible surface. Wait, my TARDIS now opens up to Harry Potter spells? I could get used to that. "HAHA! Got it! Good ole J.K.!" I said happily, finally able to enter inside my home. Derpy slowly walked in, and a second later, was crumpled to the floor of my TARDIS as Rainbow Dash flew in above her and knocked her over. Rainbow ceased all forms of motion, a look of astonishment freezing on her face. Then she keeled backwards, and I vaguely heard a goat bleating somewhere off in the distance. Ah well, nothing I haven't seen before, taking notice of her placement on the floor. Derpy was far more cautious in entering. She stepped in carefully after recovering from Dash's unintentional attack, a look of wonder on her face. It looked especially odd because of her eyes. I trotted up to the scanner (which doubled as a type of computer) and started typing in random key words. Hmmm, I don't suppose I could Yahoo Answers! this... I instead searched up "colorful ponies". All sorts of things popped up. Most of them were old action figures, from a series I remembered was called, "My Little Pony." Nothing I recognized however. I was just about to search up the names of the ponies that I had met when I scrolled down and found a photo of a group of pony friends. Three of which looked very familiar. I quickly clicked on the photo, and sure enough, Rainbow Dash, Pinkie Pie, and Fluttershy were there looking happy along with three other ponies and a small dragon. I was really weirded out now. Derpy and Rainbow Dash (now awakened) were too occupied looking around the TARDIS and going into the closer hallways, content to leave me alone for the time being. As I scrolled through the page that held the photo, it mentioned a TV show called "Friendship is Magic". I quickly searched that term up, and I couldn't believe what I saw. Apparently, Rainbow Dash, Fluttershy, Pinkie Pie, and their friends were from an earth TV show. What. The. Hay? My mind was reeling. I spent the next hour finding out everything I could about the TV show, even watching parts of episodes. I learned of the sonic rainboom, cupcakes, dragons, manticores, and most importantly, the Elements of Harmony. Also, I learned that there really was a Princess Celestia and a Princess Luna. I didn't think I was being tricked. No one would go through this much just for a joke. Seeing nothing of Derpy in the research, I searched up her name. Apparently she was a "background pony" and showed up randomly in the show. I couldn't believe it. They were on TV and they didn't even tell me? I abandoned my research and ran to go and find them, wherever they were in the TARDIS. I was lucky, they were in one of the first places I looked, the swimming pool in the library. I slammed the door open, and they stopped examining everything and froze at the look on my face. "Why didn't either of you tell me you were on TV?" My voice was deadly quiet. "What?" Rainbow Dash said, looking genuinely confused. I quickly told them everything that I had learned, growing louder with each sentence. As I finished, they sat in silence. Then they ran over towards the general direction of the control room. I ran ahead of them so that they wouldn't get lost and showed them the scanner with all of the information. "So you mean we've been filmed for our entire lives? And we never even knew?" Rainbow Dash asked in a quiet voice. "I don't get it. Why?" Derpy asked, looking at me. "How should I know? I didn't know I was being filmed and had my own TV show. Apparently you guys do too." "Wait, so then does that mean that we're being filmed right now, at this very moment?" Rainbow asked, looking around as if trying to find a hidden camera. "I don't know, but if they are, then we all need to act extremely clever to get rid of them. I don't want people watching my every move." "Wait, so then, if they film us, and they also film you, what TV show would this be on if it ever went on TV?" Derpy asked, one eye looking at me, the other one roaming around looking for something lurking in the shadows. "I have no idea. But we need to be careful. I don't know who's watching us." I said quietly, whispering to my companions. I was already thinking of them like that. Funny how things turn out. Everypony was silent for a moment, afraid to speak for the time being. It didn't last for long however. Suddenly, the phone started ringing. I shook myself out of my thoughts and went to go and answer it. Bad idea. As soon as I had done that a wave of darkness swept over me, and was instantly gone. The feeling was still there though, something bad was watching us. "Um, hello?" "Hello Doctor. We have been expecting you to enter our world. We just never knew it would be so soon." A raspy voice sounded from the phone. "What do you mean, 'You've been expecting me?' Who are you? How did you know this?" "Now now, Doctor, if we told you, it wouldn't be a surprise, would it?" "What do you mean a surprise?" The voice made a sound of disappointment. "We do not answer to you. We like your new friends though. Let's see. Miss Rainbow Dash and Miss Derpy Hooves? What a pleasure to meet you." They gasped. "How do you know who we are?" Rainbow Dash demanded. Flying over to the phone. "We have our ways. After all, we have been watching you for many years. You will be meeting us soon enough. When we take something that is very dear to you away. And it will be especially heartbreaking when you realize that you didn't even know we had it." None of knew what to say, I was too busy thinking to respond. Fortunately, the weird thing on the other side of the phone was perfectly content with talking about itself. I was lucky, it was inexperienced, it was telling us all about it without us having to figure it out. I opened my mouth, about to ask them what they were, when they started talking before I could. "We are creatures of the shadows, Doctor, to answer the question that was about to be asked. Count the shadows Doctor, remember that? We are not them though, cousins perhaps. What you faced then is nothing compared to us. We will overcome anything you will throw at us. After all, we were just waiting for the perfect opportunity." A laugh came through the telephone. I saw something dark slink from the receiver to the ground, stopping underneath the console. Rainbow Dash bent down to go and take a closer look, and I pulled her back. "Don't step in the shadows!" "You catch on quickly Doctor. Be thankful for that. Now remember, we are in your midsts. Watch where you step Doctor, one wrong move could give you up. We could get you right now, but where's the fun in that? Let's play a game Doctor. You get to go first. We eagerly await your next move." The voice stopped talking, and I heard the sound of a phone being hung up. I learned then that stony silence can be pretty noisy
The Shadows Hold the AnswersHeh, sorry about that guys. I thought I posted this chapter but apparently I didn't... ANYWAYS... here ya go. Oh, and about Dinky. I made her Derpy's sister because I thought that Derpy's personality and age (according to my story, at least) would not have allowed her to have a kid at the moment... I stared at the phone reciever, along with the two ponies on opposite sides of me. The buzzing noise of the phone brought me back out of my thoughts, and I put it back on the holster with a rather skillful flip. Using my mouth of course. Maybe when I turned human again, my mouth would be just as handy. Then I realized how it might taste. Or look. Ugh, no one will EVER take me seriously ever again. As though they do now... STOP GOING OFF ON RANDOM TANGEANTS. I THOUGHT WE WENT OVER THIS I shook my head, and snapped out of my trance. "Okay, um, that was kind of strange. Luckily, they're the kind of folk who blurt out their plans to everypony. That's good. Awesome. Right-o. But, I can't say everything out loud. As far as we know, they could be watching us right now. That's bad. I vote we all speak in sign language. I also vote that the Doctor's vote counts for five votes. Only I am clever enough to get five votes. So all in favor of sign language, say I. I. Awesome, five for me." Derpy and Dash stared at me. "You two aren't speaking. Okay, that's cool too. You catch on fast. Sign language wins." I held up my hoof, and remembered that my fingers were out of order. "Ok, just kidding. Forget sign language. Anyone know Gallifreyan? Of course you don't, that was a stupid question. Raxicoricofallapatorian? Ood? Judoon?" "Ooh, say that second one again. The raxifalapatory thingy. That one sounds funny." Rainbow Dash said, obviously not seeing the whole picture. "RAXICORICOFALLAPATORIAN! Ugh, ummmmm... Are you both fluent in Pig Latin? That's an Earth language." "orta-say." Derpy replied, but it took her a couple of seconds. "What the heck is pig latin?" Rainbow Dash asked. I groaned. "Okay fine, we'll just stick with Equestrian for now. Learn Pig Latin. It's a useful skill... Oh, what am I thinking?! Of course they can understand whatever language we speak. That entire conversation never happened as of now." h They stared at me. Again. "Ok, we need to figure out why they are here. What their motive are, their goals, the reason. Have either of you two seen anything strange or out of the ordinary in Ponyville lately? It doesn't matter how small, anything." Rainbow Dash spoke up. "Not really. Ummmmmm, well my friend Applejack left for Manehattan a couple days ago. She wouldn't tell any of us why, or how long she was going to be gone. Maybe we could go and check Sweet Apple Acres and see if she's back yet?" I thought for a moment. That's it? That's all that's out of ordinary? Ponyville really was a boring town. "Okay, why not. But who's Applejack? Why is it so strange that she left?" We left the TARDIS in it's invisible state (difficult to explain if it was suddenly stumbled upon) and galloped over to Sweet Apple Acres, wherever that was. As I ran and they flew, Rainbow Dash gave me a few basic details on Applejack. Her coloring, cutie mark, Element of Honesty, all that stuff. I also learned that Apple Bloom was her younger sister. As we ran far past Ponyville and onto a dirt road leading out into a grove of apple trees far away, I asked, "So why is it so strange that she left for Manehattan?" "Because she hates Manehattan. She went there when she was a little filly and couldn't stand the city life. So she came back to Ponyville and found her calling as an apple bucker." Derpy said. "Wait, how do you know so much about Applejack, Derpy?" Rainbow was confused. "Dinky told me. Apparently Applejack came in to talk about cutie marks for Miss Cheerilee's class." "Who's Dinky?" I asked. "She's my younger sister. Unicorn. We still can't figure out how that happened, what with mom and dad both being pegasi..." I saw the apple trees getting closer in my field of vision. As far as I could tell, it was a massive apple farm, with a big red barn and a smaller house in one section and tons of apple trees taking up the surrounding area. I followed Rainbow Dash and Derpy as they flew out to a section of the orchard that contained a red stallion hitting the apple trees with his hind legs. He waved as Derpy came up to him, and gave Dash no acknowledgement whatsoever. "Big Mac, is Applejack back yet?" Derpy asked, landing on the ground. Rainbow opted to stay skybound. "Eeyup." He said, and walked to the next tree. "Well, could you tell us where she is?" Dash asked. "... Eeynope." "... what do you mean 'eeynope'?! WHERE IS SHE?" Dash asked, obviously annoyed. Silence. Big Mac bucked the tree and the apples came raining down, one catching Dash on the head before falling into the bucket. "Tell us where she is!" Derpy asked, trying to get Dash to calm down. Big Mac pointedly looked at Rainbow Dash, then went to collect the buckets of apples. "Why are you looking at me like th- wait a minute. This isn't about the prank I pulled on you yesterday, is it?" "Eeyup." Big Mac turned and showed us a bandage on his flank. "I apologized! It's not my fault the party cannon went crazy. Although, it was kinda funny when it turned on you and then..." She blushed and stopped talking. "Anyways, PLEASE JUST TELL US WHERE APPLEJACK IS!" Silence again. "Now, what is all of this nonsense about? Good afternoon, Rainbow and Derpy. It is so nice to see you again!" An unfamiliar voice sounded behind us, and we all turned, with the exception of Big Mac, who had apparently lost interest in us and moved on to the next tree. Here was a strange pony with an orange coat and a yellow mane all tied up in curls. She had on a fancy looking dress, which seemed kind of strange considering we were out in a dusty old farm in a tiny town... "... Applejack? What the hay happened to you?! Why do you sound so... weird?" Rainbow Dash was appalled, inspecting the apparent "Applejack" from all angles. Wait, this is Applejack? She is not at all like what Dash told me... "What do you mean? This is how I have always talked, is that not true?" Applejack replied, a confused look on her face. "Well... you sound like a Manehattanite. What happened to your accent?" Derpy asked, circling Applejack. "What accent? I don't have an accent! This is how I have always talked!" Applejack said, her eyes nervously scanning our faces. "And who is this young fellow?" Ha, young fellow. 906 years old and still a young fellow. "I'm John Smith. Pleased to meet you, I guess?" I was still at a loss, this is not at all how Applejack sounded. The way Rainbow Dash spoke about her, she was a rough and tumble country girl who loved competing and never lied. In front of me was a posh and well put together mare who seemed as though she would shriek if a speck of dirt ever got onto her coat. Ok, this is really weird... The late afternoon sun cast long shadows across the ground, making Big Mac's, Rainbow Dash's, Derpy's, and my shadows twice as long as normal. It just looked so cool! I love that. It's like I'm a giant or something. Or a cyberman. Ooh, I wonder what a cyberman's shadow would look like. That would be cool. Or what abo- I THOUGHT WE WENT OVER THIS. NO. RANDOM. TANGEANTS. Rainbow Dash was still arguing with Applejack about her new look and voice, while Derpy just looked confused. I walked over to Big Mac, who had moved to the next trees about twenty feet away. "Sooo... what was all that about a prank and a party cannon?" Big Mac blushed, and muttered a few things under his breath. "stupid... pinkie... streamers... banana..." Okayyyy thennnnnn. I'll find out from Rainbow Dash later. "Um, this is probably a weird question, considering the fact that I've never actually met Applejack until now, but is she a little... off?" He looked at me and sighed. "She came back from Manehattan like that. Couldn't change 'er mind about who she was. Just kept on talkin' about how she was always like this and dressed like that. We stopped tryin' to convince 'er otherwise a few days ago, but she wouldn't listen. So... eeyup. She's way off..." I blinked. Huh, I thought he could only say eeyup and eeynope. Apparently he had a bigger vocabulary than I had originally thought. Also, he had a strong country drawl. Come to think of it, so did Apple Bloom. So that must mean she also has a strong accent. So why is she talking like that? I looked back over in the direction of the three mares. Does this have something to do with the things on the phone? It's possible... Suddenly, something clicked in my head. I looked back to the ground, taking notice of all of our shadows. They were all still twice as tall as the owners. Except for one.
