Author's Note

Hi. I am letting you know now. This story is about loss, about pain. About dealing with hardship. This will not be story for the faint of heart. I want to write something a little emotional. Please be aware of this. I do still love comments feel free to leave them.

01: ...Pain

He wasn’t sure how many days had passed. They all blurred into his collected thoughts. He only knew that it was now raining outside the castle window. The lights were dim in his room. He was seated on the bed holding the object in his hand. He was staring down at it. He been doing that for however long he had been in this room. He didn’t even remember walking into this room.

Everything had been silence since……

The only noise he had heard was the sound of the rain that was now coming down against the glass. His eyes didn’t leave the object that he was focused on. He thought maybe…just maybe if he focused on it long enough that something would happen. That…what happened would just go away.

This thing was magical right? Even though he had been in Equestria for so long he didn’t really understand magic all that well. So there was hope, a hope that he was clinging to with everything he had. What else could he do? He had been doing the bare minimum to keep himself afloat in this guest room.

He heard the knocking at the door. He didn’t answer. Maybe he was close to something and if he broke his focus on the thing in his hand it could break down what he had been doing. Another knock came to the door….then silence. Then the cricking of the door was heard. Still he just faced away on the bed not even giving the door a second thought.

“Anon…?” The voice called out. A familiar tone to his ears.

An answer wasn’t needed. He heard hoof falls against the wooden floor of the room. This pony was walking towards him. He remained still…remaining focused on the object in his hands. Even when they got next to him. He could see them in the corner of his eyes. It was….Luna. The Alicorn of the night. The starlight in her flowing mane always was a treat to look at…but, not in this moment. Those stars had lost their luster maybe it just was his mindset…or maybe the events of late had made her lights weaker.

“….You haven’t eaten in days.” She exclaimed. The concern on her face was easy enough to see. He didn’t need it. He just needed to focus. He could make things better. The thing in his hand always made things better at least when she…

“I am not hungry.” He finally spoke hoping those words would make her leave. She was distracting him.

“Even if you’re not you should still….” She was cut off quickly by him.

“Has Celestia eaten anything?” The question came out a little too sharp. Frustration was leaking through. He shouldn’t take it out on her. He knew that. He wasn’t sleeping much either.

Her brow furrowed as she stomped her hoof against the oak of the floor. “Even if she isn’t that doesn’t mean you shouldn’t be.” Her expression softened again. “….It’s broken Anon. It can’t work…even if it did it only worked for…” This was the only time he lifted his eyes from the object in his hand. He just stared at her.

She bit back her words a hoof raised to his arm placing it gently upon him. She offered a weak smile. The only smile she could probably muster at a time like this. “We're holding a ceremony in a few days. Celestia has agree to be there and make sure everything goes well. I hope you will be there too.” Her words…caused both panic and anger within him.

How could they do this? There was still hope. He could fix it. He looked back down at the object in his hand completely closing her out again. Her eyes dropped, and she pulled her hoof back. She turned away from him and began walking to the door. She stopped herself in front of it. She knew she should say something but, couldn’t find the words.

“…I really think you should come. I really think…you should get out of this room.” That’s all she said. She walked out, closing the door behind her.

She was wrong. He knew she was wrong. All he needed to do was focus on this before the ceremony. He was going to prove them all wrong. He would fix this…and then somehow this thing would fix everything like it always did. He just needed….he just needed to focus. His grip on the object tighten. Why wasn’t it working? Why didn’t it fix itself? He had been taught since he got here that friendship had its own kind of magic. He needed that magic more than ever right now.

Nothing happened still. The room silence returned. Only the rain was heard as the wind whipped it against the window. Was everything he knew a lie? Was the magic that she taught him a lie? The magic they all taught him. A pretty little lie to make yourself feel better….that was the pain talking. He wanted something to blame.

The object in his hand. It was her crown. The crown she had…..It was split down the middle. The gemstone had been cracked and the golden band broken. He had been holding it since he picked it up back then. He just had to make it work. He knew if he just held out for a little longer just a few more days it would…do something right? He didn’t know what day it was.

How many days had he already been holding onto this broken thing, and praying some spark of magic would come off it? He needed magic. Magic could fix anything right? Even something like this. “Please…work. Please…..Please…..PLEASE.” He begged to the unseen force of magic that he thought ruled this world the only thing that answer back was the rain. The quiet rain against the glass and the howling wind that didn’t seem to give him any rest.

How he wished he could blame the rain for the tear drops that landed on the gemstone of the crown in that moment. Ooo how he wished the rain would stop and the silence would come back to him…so that the falling of his tears would leave as well.