The Coitus Contract

by Some Leech

Rating: mature
Tags: Random, Human, Anon, Porn, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Fetish, Sex, Twilight Sparkle
Length: 3574

Twilight calls on Anon for a very specific favor and, wouldn't you know it, it's not something he was really expecting...

Anon would give Twilight Sparkle the shirt off his back - if she wore clothing, that is. Ever since he arrived in Equestria, she's done everything in her power to help him out and make him comfortable. After the Princess of Friendship shares a drink with the man, she opens up and asks him for something very specific...

Kinks Include: Female on Male, Male on Female, Oral, Vaginal, Estrus (Heat), a Particularly Lusty Mare, Implied Impregnation, Very Vocal Sex, and a Creampie

Artwork and accompanying animation by Hatter's Lye
You can find the animation on his patreon. Wubcake did the voice work.

If you want to help support me, I have a Tip-Jar/Patreon HERE

Published 2020-07-01 20:20:03 UTC
Last updated 2020-07-01 20:20:03 UTC

Asinine Assistance

It wasn’t like Anon was dragging his feet to get to Twilight’s castle, but he sure as hell wasn’t tearing ass to get to her place. He knew the day would come when she finally called upon him for a very specific purpose, yet he’d had no way of knowing exactly when the moment would eventually come to pass. Having made a solemn promise that he’d help her in any way he could, after everything she’d done for him, she’d dropped a bomb on him.

After arriving in Equestria, Twilight had been the first pony he’d met, she’d given him a job, made sure he had a place to stay, and regularly popped in to see if he was adjusting well. All told, even though she was a magical horse princess, she was a startlingly sweet mare, if not a little obsessive. What had started as her passive curiosity about him blossomed into a nearly fanatical level of interest.

Anon didn’t mind the interviews and lengthy discussions about himself or Earth - no, those were actually pretty interesting; the red flags didn’t start showing up until she had begun asking about his physiology. It seemed innocent enough, at first, though Twilight kept pushing for more and more information. Before he knew it, she’d been hooking him up to dubiously scientific devices and measuring parts of his anatomy - yes, all of his anatomy.

He told himself that she was just being thorough, simply being fascinated with an alien biped from some far-flung world, but his gut told him that wasn’t the case. The princess’ tone and demeanor would shift, whenever he was around. She’d become more energetic, sit right beside him, and he could swear that he’d caught her ogling his crotch a handful of times. Fortunately, she’d never done anything too overtly, unsettling - that was, until he shared a few drinks with the little purple mare.

It had been maybe three months after he’d arrived, shortly after he’d begun working at Sugarcube Corner. His little apartment, only a block or two from the city hall, wasn’t terribly expensive, although it consumed most of his meager wages. Twilight had shown up one afternoon and brought a bottle of hard cider for them to enjoy.

Confused by the offer, Anon invited her in and, after a brief chat, uncovered the truth. The princess had flat-out bought his abode, negating any need for him to pay rent. It was possibly the most gracious thing anyone had ever done for the man, leaving him speechless. As Twilight waved away his shock, downplaying it as if it were nothing, she produced a pair of glasses and proposed they celebrate.

One drink of the potent spirit turned into a second, then a third and fourth, before they’d nearly emptied the bottle. It had been a splendid evening, with the two swapping stories and laughing for hours on end. His memory of the event was pretty murky, if he was being totally honest, until she said something that sobered him up instantly. Smiling over at him and resting a hoof on his knee, Twilight had cheerfully spoken a single line that hit him like a gong.

“Anon, the next time I’m in season, I want you to copulate with me…”

Anon sat stunned, unsure of what to say or how to react. Before he could even begin to think of a response, she’d begun blathering on about how perfect he would be for her. Even if he hadn’t been slightly buzzed, most of the jargon would have flown over his head. As she excitedly rambled about vaginal depth, as well as the dimensions and curvature of his manhood, he dumbly nodded and grinned over.

“So...You promise?” she’d asked, beaming up at him.

Anon nodded a second time, unable to do otherwise. Considering everything she’d done for him, how was he supposed to turn her down? She was a sweet girl, probably the smartest pony in Equestria, and slated to rule over the entire empire - only a moron or would refuse a request of that sort, even if it was from a little princess horse!

After she’d departed for the night, giving him a goodbye hug, he’d flopped into bed and fallen into a deep sleep. Unfortunately, the next morning, the implications of what he’d agreed to became more clear. At some point in the future, perhaps days, months, or years down the line, he’d be called upon to sex up a pastel equine mare. Little did he know his moment was mere weeks away.

It had been a day like any other; Anon had gotten up, worked a shift at the bakery, then gone home to shower and relax. After getting washed up and flopping into his recliner, he noticed an oddly placed scroll on his coffee table. Cracking the seal and unfurling the parchment, he read over the scrawled note.

~

Anon,

I won’t waste any time saying this, I need to call in that favor. I hope it isn’t a bad time, but I really, REALLY need you right now. Don’t worry, I’ve taken every conceivable precaution, as well as a few inconceivable precautions. See yourself to my castle as soon as you read this.

Sincerely,

Twilight

P.S. Please hurry, I’m leaking like a faucet and I can only tell Spike it’s fruit juice for so long.

~

And so, with a heavy sigh, Anon threw on a pair of shorts and tromped out his door. Even before Twilight had made her rather ham-fisted proposition, he had toyed with the concept of bedding a pony. Given that there was no foreseeable way back to Earth, he figured it was only a matter of time until he ended up in the sack with one of Equestria’s denizens - hell, a part of him was even a touch excited about it.

It wasn’t like he’d ever been sexually attracted to animals or anything, but ponies were different. Remarkably intelligent and friendly, they traipsed around nude almost all of the time. With their enthralling, pillowy posteriors on full display, as if it was the most natural thing in the world, he was treated to fleeting glimpses of naughty bits constantly. As provocative as their backsides were, most shared one additional element which captivated him.

Virtually every pony, save for a very select few, was exceptionally small. On average, mares only reached his upper thighs; stallions were a bit taller, but not by much. Either way, both sexes of tiny equine were far smaller than he was. Be damned if he could explain why he’d always had a weakness for vertically challenged women, but he’d landed himself in a sea of what were effectively quadrupedal shortstacks.

As the Castle of Friendship came into view, Anon steeled his resolve. The letter he’d received made it painfully obvious what Twilight was summoning him for, causing his pulse to quicken. He had little doubt that she already had some grand plan prepared for him, although he could only guess at the specifics. With as meticulous as she was, chances were high that he’d be subjected to some experimentation or lengthy and excruciatingly precise foreplay - not to mention the unavoidable documentation of the experience.

Shaking his head, he stepped up to the door and knocked. Idling by the threshold, waving to a pair of ponies walking nearby, the world winked out of existence. In a blinding flash and rush of displaced air, he found himself standing within a small chamber - well, standing for a split second, before the vertigo hit him. Stumbling, he sank to a knee.

He’d only been teleported once or twice before, and he absolutely hated it. Though the mode of transit was faster and more convenient than anything he could imagine, it was horrendously disorienting. Screwing his eyes closed, attempting to catch his breath, his condition was exacerbated by a weight crashing against him.

“Anon!” Twilight bleated, wrapping her forehooves around his neck. “I’m so glad you came, I couldn’t wait another minute!!!”

“Uh-huh,” Anon grunted, blindly patting her back.

She really was a sweetheart, there was no doubt about that, but sometimes her excitement got the better of her. She never meant anything bad by her impulsive actions, although they could and often did come off as somewhat reckless. Rubbing her hip, while his sense of stability slowly returned, she shifted her rump into his palm.

“Oh, Anon, how forward!” she tittered, burying her face in his neck. Inhaling sharply, drawing in his scent, she shivered in his grasp. “You smell absolutely amazing.”

He’d figured she’d be somewhat worked up, having read up on estrus a tad, but he couldn’t have fathomed that she’d come onto him like a lusty prom date. Peeking out, he steadied himself and leaned back. No sooner had he retracted his head than Twilight shot forward. Pressing her lips to his, her tongue pressed into his mouth.

As he gently pushed her away, an all too familiar sound greeted him. A dim, rosy aura surrounded his upper half, pulling him deeper into the kiss. Trapped in her magical clutches, having woefully underestimated how horny she was, he reluctantly closed his eyes. It was pretty fucking hot, if he was being honest with himself, although the abruptness of her affection had taken him completely off guard.

Wrapping his free hand around her, he slowly began to reciprocate her motions. Curious hints of grass and oats greeted his taste buds, as his tongue entwined with hers. Only just getting into the swing of things, tenderly caressing her back and flank, he was sorcerously pushed onto his back.

Twilight’s face stayed plastered against his, while she carefully moved above him. Though he couldn’t see all that much, keeping his eyes closed throughout the repositioning, he felt her step over his torso. Easing her haunches down squarely atop his groin, she ground her crotch against him. It only took him a moment to register how unbelievably hot her loins were, even through his shorts.

As if making out with an adorable dork like Twilight wasn’t hot enough, the realization that the only thing separating her marehood from his package was a flimsy piece of cloth drove him wild. Regardless of whether or not he’d just been mounted by a human or pony, the act of having a painfully aroused female on top of him tickled the primal regions of his brain. Growing harder with every passing second, he reflexively bucked his hips.

Apparently the impromptu thrust flicked a switch within the alicorn, because she immediately broke their kiss. Gazing down upon him, hungrily licking her lips, the light around her horn flared. His shorts and boxers exploded - literally blown to tatters from around his waist. Startled though he was, the unexpected mayhem left him completely unharmed.

Somehow, without so much as having glanced towards his lower half, she’d swiftly and savagely doffed half of his apparel. Freed from its fabric prison, his manhood rested squarely against her slavering snatch. The heat against his delicate limb was staggering, joined by the unmistakable sensation of her dampened sex. Ready or not, he was about to breach the interspecies barrier.

“I hope you’re ready to - Mmmmm - scratch that itch,” Twilight purred, rocking her hips forward and back.

He was - he really, really was, but he was demanded to have some say in the matter. Releasing her tush, he pressed a hand to her chest. With the initial bewilderment of the teleportation and amorous address having faded to a degree, he swiftly took stock of his surroundings. A comfortable looking lounger rested to the side of the room, giving him an idea.

“If you want it, go present yourself,” he instructed, pointing towards the chair.

Twilight paused, seemingly taken aback by the declaration. He could practically see her processing his request, as a sly grin split her features. Languidly pushing herself up, leaving her nectar to cool upon his equipment, she dismounted and turned away. Sauntering over to the recliner, she seductively swayed her hips from side to side and crawled upon the padded surface.

Anon could scarcely believe his eyes, as she draped her forelegs over one arm of the chair. With her rump dangling precariously off the cushion, leveled directly at him, she flagged her tail and swung it to the side. The sight of her marehood really hammered home how bad off she was, while he steadily got to his feet.

The unabashed view of her backside was stunning, luring him closer. Contrasted against her mulberry coat, the meaty folds of her engorged sex were a dark violet. Delectably plump and moist, it looked even more inviting than a human woman’s snatch. As he drew nearer, imagining what wonders her depths held, she winked.

Her clit bulged forth, revealing a tantalizing glimpse of her succulent, pink interior. A single bead of glimmering nectar dangled from her drooling marehood, causing him to slow. Though he’d had every intention of going in for the kill, an idea struck him. Kneeling down, he shuffled forward and brought his face to her crotch.

“What are yooooooooo...Oh, Anon!” Twilight groaned, as he breathed hotly against her.

Inhaling through his nose, he appraised the aroma of her arousal. Not dissimilar to a human’s, yet holding a unique floral note, she smelled wonderful. Inching closer, drawn in by the provocative bouquet, he treated himself to a taste. The piquant, oddly sweet flavors of her nethers were even better than he could have imagined. Giving himself a moment to warm her up, he nonchalantly stroked himself off.

Twilight hummed contentedly, allowing him to enjoy his appetizer. Winking every few seconds, allowing him to easily accost her bulbous clit, she seemed happy with the foreplay. Though he’d never really asked if eating pussy was a common sexual act in Equestria, he could see himself getting used to it; not only did it taste slightly better than a woman’s, but there was something strangely gratifying about seeing such a state of arousal.

Diggin his tongue into her silken depths, hearing a muted whimper from the princess, Anon was spurred onward. Dining on marehood was all well and good, but he quickly reached a tipping point. Pulling away, licking the savory juices from his lips, he stood. As he got into position, gently resting one hand on her hip, she gazed back at him.

“You want it?” he asked, tauntingly prodding her entrance.

While Twilight didn’t say a word, the look she gave him spoke volumes. Gnawing her lip and casually nodding, her pleading eyes screamed of barely restrained yearning. Smiling, Anon tightened his grip and pressed his hips forward. As his shaft gradually ground into her, she trembled beneath him. Sweet, merciful Celestia, it was more amazing than he could have dreamed.

Slick, taut, and astoundingly hot, her satiny canal embraced him. It was like finding some lewd Goldilocks zone - not too tight, not too loose, just right. Plunging deeper and deeper, wondering if or when he would bottom out, continued onward. It was only when he was nearly hilted within her did he feel the resistance of her inner gate.

Pausing briefly, he wrenched his shirt up and off his frame. With his poor shorts obliterated, he saw no need to remain dressed - especially considering that Twilight was already in the buff. Peering down his bare chest, withdrawing his tool, he watched her clench down around his length. Once half of his glistening manhood had fled from her confines, he steadied himself and thrust into her.

Sluggishly bucking his hips, he began tenderly plowing her. With no need to rush, hoping to relish the new experience, his motions were slow and sensual. Just because Twilight had expressly summoned him for a booty call didn’t mean he couldn’t take his time and enjoy himself - at least, that had been the plan.

Evidently Twilight wasn’t satisfied with the love-making approach. Her horn blazed with power, as she vehemently forced him to rut her faster and harder than before. Thrown off by the jarring change of pace, he did what he could to remain upright. Absentmindedly grabbing her dock, he yanked on her tail.

“Oh buck!” she mewled, her magic falteringly sputtering.

Regaining some semblance of control, Anon realized what he had to do. Slamming his waist forward, he delivered a hammering blow to her womb. For a second noticeable time, her sorcery seemed to wither. With his suspicions cemented, his fingers sank into her supple flesh. If she wanted it rough, so help him, that’s exactly what she was going to get.

Pulling out all the stops, Anon started ruthlessly jackhammering into the little mare. She most definitely had him beat in the arcane department, but his physical strength vastly outshone hers. Slamming into her from behind, his hand crept from her haunch. Up her side, over her shoulder, and to her neck, his hand drifted, until he was holding her collar. Using it for additional leverage, pulling her into his thrusts, he unleashed everything he had.

“K...keep going!” she stammered.

Though he had no intention of halting, her words stoked the roaring inferno of his lust. Leveling every ounce of his carnal fury against her, he pounded into the princess with reckless abandon. The air was filled with the sound of their colliding bodies, heavy breaths, and the occasional muted moan or whimper of delight.

Immeasurably pleased with how well his tactic had subdued the salacious and overly enthusiastic alicorn, Anon crept closer to his limit. Slowing marginally, unwilling to push himself over too quickly, he continued fucking her at a slightly slower pace. Twilight, to her credit, milked him on the backstrokes and kept their movements synchronized.

Having bought himself a moment’s respite, he basked in the wondrous sensations she afforded. Her soft breaths, the lingering perfume and taste of her arousal, the way she constricted around his shaft, they amounted to a feast for the senses. Between the incredible experience of screwing a princess and having suffered through a painfully long dry spell, the telltale signs of release welled up within him.

Twilight turned her head, looking to his face. Seemingly sensing that he was teetering on the brink, she locked eyes with him. Between her guttural groans and blissful sighs, she spoke two single words. “Don’t stop.”

Her plea pushed him past the threshold. A tidal wave of rapture overtook him, as his cock throbbed madly within his mate. Willing himself to keep moving, praying that his final moments would tip her over the edge, he continued railing the small mare. As a torrent of spunk coursed through his shaft, painting Twilight’s interior with his essence, his wish was granted.

With shuddering breaths and a climactic cry, her wings twitched uncontrollably at her sides. Spasming around his length, she quivered and threw her head back. “It’s...so good!” she gasped, while her womb was doused with his seed.

Stepping back, Anon hauled his tool from her. His baby-batter weakly dribbled from her marehood, although the overwhelming majority of it stayed trapped within her. Awash in post coitus euphoria, peering down at the mess he’d made, he patted her flank. Wondering if what he’d done constituted as bestiality, his stupor was catastrophically robbed from him.

Turning her head, resting her cheek on the arm of the chair, Twilight gazed up at him. “If I’m not thoroughly knocked up after that, we can try again in a week…”

Askance, Anon shook his head. There was no way he’d heard her right. “Huh?” he dumbly murmured, staring down at her.

“The breeding, Silly! If you didn’t pump a foal in me, we can give it another shot soon! Don’t worry, my estrus should last for the better part of a month; there will be plenty of time!” she purred, clamping her thighs shut.

Swallowing hard, Anon cleared his throat. “I...is that even possible?”

Caressing her abdomen with one wing, Twilight grinned from ear to ear. “If my calculations are correct, there’s a ninety seven point six percent chance that you just put a foal in this oven…”

His mouth flapped wordlessly, as he eyed her stomach. If he’d known that it was possible for him to impregnate a pony, he may have handled the situation a bit differently - still, it wasn’t all bad. Twilight was inordinately intelligent, one of the most powerful creatures in the land, and heiress to a continent spanning empire; if nothing else, fathering her kids wasn’t a terrible fate.

“So - uh - I guess I’ll be your trophy husband?” he laughed weakly, rubbing the back of his neck.

“Mmmhmm,” she hummed, before easing herself from the chair. Trotting past him, towards her bedchamber, she motioned for him to follow. “But we should probably give it another two or three rounds tonight, just to be sure.”

Something about seeing her traipse away, with his jizz creeping down her inner thighs, caused his manhood to twitch. Shrugging to himself, he followed along after her. Though he couldn’t fathom why an alicorn princess would select him as a mate, he wasn’t about to complain. His position as royal concubine would most assuredly have several benefits, amongst which would include a new pair of shorts. Trotting up beside her, he smiled to himself and wondered if he’d rather try missionary or cowgirl for their next round…