EFFECT AND CAUSE: A CASE STUDY OF THREE FILLIES AND THEIR VARIOUS ATTEMPTS TO ACQUIRE THEIR CUTIE MARKS
by Princess Twilight Sparkle
The following entries are chronicling the numerous attempts of three young fillies and their various attempts in acquiring their cutie marks. These pones (Apple Bloom, Sweetie Belle, and Scootaloo) have taken part in a number of activities in order to find their special talent. However, despite these attempts, none of them have granted the fillies their cutie marks at the time of this record. I, Princess Twilight Sparkle, have taken it upon myself to document these endeavors with the permission of the subjects.
Date: 10/22/20██, 12:09 PM
Location: Cutie Mark Crusaders Clubhouse, Sweet Apple Acres
Attempted Activity: Clothing designing and sewing.
Transcript: Sweetie Belle arrived with a sewing machine “borrowed” from her sister’s shop, Carousel Boutique. Upon the discovery of the lack of materials to be used to be made into clothing, the fillies began to use items that they had within the clubhouse itself.
End Results: Four “dresses” were made out of leaves, paper-mâché, their own Cutie Mark Crusader capes, chunks of mane and tail hair from each filly, lumber, and various other objects (see attachments 1.1 through 1.4). One broken sewing machine. Rarity appeared to be in tears over how badly damaged the sewing machine was. Sweetie Belle was grounded. Apple Bloom had to be assisted after sewing her own bow into a dress while it was still tied to her mane.
Cutie Marks: Negative
Date: 11/18/20██, 4:13 PM
Location: Ponyville Schoolhouse
Attempted Activity: Private investigation.
Transcript: The Cutie Mark Crusaders were presented with a case by their teacher, Cheerilee, who had an answer key to a test stolen. The entire schoolhouse was placed in lockdown by the Cutie Mark Crusaders (despite them not having any authority to do such and against Cheerilee’s insistence that the fillies return to their seats). All three fillies took turns investigating and interrogating the entire class.
End Results: Mystery was solved (Cheerilee misplaced the answer key by placing it within the wrong textbook). While each filly seemed to have a talent and showed excellent critical thinking skills, all three claimed it was “too much work” and gave up when presented with a new case from a fellow classmate, Pipsqueak. Scootaloo appeared to thoroughly enjoy playing ‘bad cop’. All three fillies surrendered their badges at the end of the day, despite never being issued any. Investigation ongoing as to where said badges came from.
Cutie Marks: Negative
Date: 12/30/20██, 9:02 AM
Location: Sugar Cube Corner, Ponyville
Attempted Activity: Baking.
Transcript: Each of the Cutie Mark Crusaders attempted, with the supervision of Mrs. Cake, to bake a pie of their choosing. At the insistence of the fillies, the taste tester was selected to be myself, Princess Twilight Sparkle.
End Results: All three fillies finished baking a pie and each were presented to myself (see attachments 2.1 through 2.3). The results were as follows:
- Apple Bloom: Tart apple pie. A solid blend of flavors but still plenty of room for improvement.
- Sweetie Belle: Pumpkin pie with chocolate frosting and gummy worms as a topping. Interior of the pie was soupy while the toppings were not suited for the pumpkin pie.
- Scootaloo: [OMITTED]. Stomach was pumped shortly after the first three bites.
Cutie Marks: Negative, however there was a false positive with a splatter of chocolate on Sweetie Belle’s flank.
Date: 01/09/20██, 2:32 PM
Location: Bunny slope, Ponyville Snow Park
Attempted Activity: Skiing/Snowboarding.
Transcript: Upon beginning down skiing down the slope, Sweetie Belle repeatedly fell face first into the snow. Apple Bloom refused to jump off the chairlift and the top and rode back to the bottom each time she rode it up the hill. Scootaloo performed well down the hill with no ill effects.
End Results: Sweetie Belle acquired a mild case of hypothermia, disappointed about the lack of actual bunnies on the ‘bunny slope’. Scootaloo wishes to return.
Cutie Marks: Negative
Date: 02/17/20██, 10:13 AM
Location: Ponyville
Attempted Activity: Playing ‘match-makers’
Transcript: The Cutie Mark Crusaders decided to play ‘match-makers’ again. However, this attempt at such lasted only a few moments.
End Results: Cutie Mark Crusaders had to be reminded that Hearts And Hooves Day had already passed. Also had to repeatedly insist that I was not searching for a special somepony at this time.
Cutie Marks: Negative
Date: 03/01/20██, 2:56 PM
Location: Golden Oak Library
Attempted Activity: Card counting.
Transcript: N/A
End Results: I absolutely refuse to allow this attempt to occur under my roof or under my watch.
Cutie Marks: N/A
Date: 03/26/20██, 10:21 PM
Location: Empty field outside of Ponyville.
Attempted Activity: Aerospace engineering.
Transcript: Apple Bloom began earlier in the day by constructing what could be mistaken for a ‘rocket ship’ (in reality, it was an upside-down pig trough). Upon being seen by Sweetie Belle and Scootaloo, the three continued to build upon the item until it resembled a space-faring vessel from science-fiction. Scootaloo insisted on being the pilot and constructed a ramp to assist with launching the ship into the air. (See attachment 3.1)
End Results: After somehow obtaining professional-grade fireworks and matches, I stepped in to stop the lighting of the fuse. However, it was already lit and I quickly evacuated the three fillies away from their wooden vessel. The supposed spaceship exploded and caused a giant fireworks spectacle for all of Ponyville. The vessel did not obtain lift and was destroyed. All three fillies were grounded. Investigation into from where they obtained fireworks is currently ongoing.
Cutie Marks: Negative
Date: 04/12/20██, 4:13 PM
Location: Barn, Sweet Apple Acres
Attempted Activity: A rehearsal of a live musical performance as a rock band. Apple Bloom playing acoustic guitar, Sweetie Belle playing accordion, and Scootaloo playing trumpet.
Transcript: An argument broke out before the three fillies played a single note in regards to what sort of music they were to play. The fight amongst them continued, escalating to shouting and name calling. At that point, the fillies began throwing their instruments at one another. Apple Bloom’s older brother, Big Macintosh, arrived and broke up the commotion.
End Results: One acoustic guitar destroyed. No music was played. All three fillies were grounded.
Cutie Marks: Negative
Date: 04/27/20██, 2:47 PM
Location: Fluttershy’s cottage.
Attempted Activity: Gardening. Fluttershy supervising.
Transcript: With the assistance of Fluttershy, each of the Cutie Mark Crusaders selected a seedling to care for and nurture.
End Results: After transplanting the seedling into a portable pot, Apple Bloom’s seedling began to move and speak (see attachment 4.1). It started to call itself ‘Forsythia’ and will be hoping to bloom in the next month. This caused the Cutie Mark Crusaders and Fluttershy to scream in horror and run out of the cottage.As of this writing, Apple Bloom is currently in therapy, Sweetie Belle has not left her home in four days, and Scootaloo has not been heard of since the incident. Fluttershy is still shaken. Investigation ongoing if Discord was responsible for the incident.
Cutie Marks: Negative
Addendum: Scootaloo has been found.
Date: 05/19/20██, 8:50 PM
Location: Ponyville Theater
Attempted Activity: Stand-up comedy.
Transcript: Open mic night at the Ponyville Theater began with a number of regulars performing short sets and inspiring the Cutie Mark Crusaders. Sweetie Belle was the first to take part, performing a set that mostly consisted of her doing an impression of her sister, Rarity. The audience seemed receptive to her set. Scootaloo went second, performing a set that included self-deprecation. The audience also seemed receptive to Scootaloo’s set as well. Apple Bloom was the last of the Cutie Mark Crusaders to perform. Her set consisted of a single setup, after which she vomited on the stage. She was then heckled, to which she responded by physically attacking the audience member.
End Results: A fight broke out amongst the entire audience. Damage to the theater totaled 384 bits. Apple Bloom and Scootaloo both now have police records in the town of Ponyville. All three of the Cutie Mark Crusaders suffered minor injuries as well as seven of the audience members.
Cutie Marks: Negative, but Apple Bloom stole the microphone from the stage in the ensuing chaos (see attachment 5.1).
Date: 05/31/20██, 2:09 AM
Location: Canterlot Castle
Attempted Activity: Stealth/Espionage
Transcript: The Cutie Mark Crusaders drafted and laid out a proposal to break into and sneak about the royal palace of Princess Celestia and Princess Luna in Canterlot. Despite my insistence of them to drop the plans prior, they carried through with their plans. All three of the fillies were captured within thirty minutes of entering the castle. The Cutie Mark Crusaders split up after they were discovered by the Royal Guard, approximately fifteen minutes into the mission. Sweetie Belle galloped out into the royal garden and was found crying behind the fountain. Apple Bloom appeared to get lost and ended up in the East Wing Kitchen, where she was apprehended. Scootaloo, the last filly to be captured, made her way to the throne room and almost reached [REDACTED BY ROYAL DECREE].
End Results: All three of the Cutie Mark Crusaders have charges of breaking and entering, espionage, and lèse-majesté brought up against them, as well as Scootaloo having the additional charge of high treason. Royal Guard security has since been increased.
Cutie Marks: Negative
Addendum: Charges were dropped, but all three of the Cutie Mark Crusaders are ordered to stay off castle grounds until further notice.
Date: 06/20/20██, 11:51 AM
Location: Tartarus
Attempted Activity: Villain reforming.
Transcript: N/A
End Results: NO.
Cutie Marks: N/A
Date: 06/29/20██, 11:51 AM
Location: Golden Oak Library
Attempted Activity: Library assistance
Transcript: The Cutie Mark Crusaders began assisting in the Golden Oak Library to assist with my research and work. The various tasks they have taken part in include sorting and filing books, assisting with checking books in and out of the library to patrons, organizing the card catalogues, and other such tasks.
End Results: A number of books and other items within Golden Oak Library were misplaced, causing the entire staff of the library and the Cutie Mark Crusaders to reclean and organize. The Necronomicon is still missing. My dragon assistant, Spike, has requested that the Cutie Mark Crusaders “not to mess up [his] system around the library”.
Cutie Marks: Negative
Date: 07/11/20██, 4:25 PM
Location: Sweet Apple Acres
Attempted Activity: Wasp removal.
Transcript: A wasp nest was discovered two days prior on the farm property of Sweet Apple Acres. The three fillies devised a plan to remove said wasps and relocate to another location. The wasp nest fell according to their plan, however landing upon Sweetie Belle.
End Results: Sweetie Belle had an allergic reaction to multiple wasp stings, currently recovering (see attachments 6.1 through 6.5). Scootaloo received a black-eye from Sweetie Belle flailing around and swinging her hooves, currently recovering (see attachment 6.6). Wasp nest removed and relocated by professionals.
Cutie Marks: Negative
Date: 08/06/20██, 3:43 PM
Location: Ponyville
Attempted Activity: Firefighting
Transcript: N/A
End Results: While the Cutie Mark Crusaders attempted to join the Ponyville Fire Department, they were turned away from the Ponyville Fire Station from assisting. The three fillies talked about starting their own fires to put out with the help of my dragon assistant, Spike. The fire chief had overheard this and strictly forbade them from doing such. Spike has since vowed to not take part in any of their cutie mark attempts.
Cutie Marks: N/A
Date: 08/22/20██, 12:09 PM
Location: Ponyville Arcade
Attempted Activity: Achieving the high score on the arcade video game “Prance Prance Revolution: Extreme”.
Transcript: All three of the Cutie Mark Crusaders arrived at the Ponyville Arcade to play the video game known as “Prance Prance Revolution: Extreme” with the goal of achieving a high enough score to rank on the leaderboards. To achieve this, they would need to perform well on the ‘Expert’ setting. Each session costs four bits per play and consists of three songs selected by the player. During their time playing the game, certain songs were repeated, including “GRADUATION ~それぞれの明日~”, “LOVE♥SHINE”, “TSUGARU”, “BRE∀K DOWN!”, and “PARANOIA survivor”.
End Results: After 5 ½ hours in the arcade, the three fillies ran out of money and were unable to score high enough to reach the ranking boards, which were all filled by a player with the initials “PDP”. All three fillies suffered the forming of blisters on their hooves and J-Pop stuck in their heads for the next four days.
Cutie Marks: Negative
Addendum: I currently still have a number of the songs stuck in my head as well.
Date: 09/18/20██, 5:36 PM
Location: Carousel Boutique, Ponyville
Attempted Activity: Lucha libre
Transcript: The Cutie Mark Crusaders, after making homemade outfits (see attachment 7.1 through 7.3), began to narrate and reenact wrestling, or lucha libre, maneuvers. Apple Bloom’s wrestling alter ego was called Aerosmith. Sweetie Belle’s wrestling alter ego was called Moody Blues. Scootaloo’s wrestling alter ego was called Rancid.
End Results: After an estimated twenty-five minutes of performing mild strikes, holds, and throws to each other, Apple Bloom performed a “senton bomb” onto Sweetie Belle. After such, Sweetie Belle convinced Scootaloo to “perform a face-heel turn”. Scootaloo and Sweetie Belle worked together to perform a “double DDT” upon Apple Bloom. After this, Apple Bloom was unresponsive, to which Sweetie Belle went to get Rarity. All three fillies were taken to the hospital, where they were treated for non-threatening injuries. Two poniequins and one sewing machine were broken beyond repair. All three fillies were grounded. (Credit to Rarity for assisting with the correct wrestling terms.)
Cutie Marks: Negative
Date: 10/02/20██, 11:51 AM
Location: Everfree Forest
Attempted Activity: Backpacking/Camping
Transcript: The Cutie Mark Crusaders embarked on a backpacking trek through the Everfree Forest. The trek was planned to last three days, circling back to Ponyville.
End Results: Event ended the first evening after their campfire grew out of control. Fire is believed to have grown due to an increased use of kindling, numerous sparks and airborne embers popping out of the fire pit, and the use of, what Sweetie Belle called, “vitamin G” (gasoline). Fire was contained after two days and fully extinguished after three days. No structures burned, but sections of the Everfree Forest have since been roped off for all visitors. Damage to the forest is still being assessed (believed to be in the thousands). All three fillies are banned from conservation parks throughout Equestria.
Cutie Marks: Negative
On the date of 10/10/20██, all three of the Cutie Mark Crusaders finally obtained their cutie marks. The series of events started with the fillies assisting their classmate, Pipsqueak, run for student president against another classmate, Diamond Tiara. After Pipsqueak’s victory, the Cutie Mark Crusaders comfort a distraught Diamond Tiara and talk to her about her cutie mark, one that she claims to not fully understand. With the Cutie Mark Crusaders help, Diamond Tiara uses her means to improve the school’s playground equipment. Upon Diamond Tiara thanking the Cutie Mark Crusaders for their help and friendship and the realization from Apple Bloom that the Crusaders had been helping other ponies discover their talents, all three of the fillies acquired their cutie marks (see attachments 8.1 through 8.3).
Date: 10/10/20██, 10:57 AM
Location: Ponyville Schoolhouse
Attempted Activity: Assisting other ponies discover their own talents and abilities.
Cutie Marks: Positive
Addendum: All three marks are similar to one another and believed to be connected with one another. The cutie marks of the Cutie Mark Crusaders require further study, which is ongoing at this time.
It is unknown if the previous attempts of to acquire cutie marks by the subjects have played a role in the acquisition of their cutie marks. Currently awaiting results from other studies of similar cases.
