Stop Me If You've Heard This One Before
Rain fell outside the windows as the day dragged on.
It was part of being a private detective, Sunset supposed. You tended to get bored between cases since you had to wait for them to come to you. Sunburst had taken to listening to a police scanner while he practiced skills that he insisted he needed to know just in case they came up in their investigations. Currently, he was messing with a lock-picking kit that she'd gotten him for his birthday and the clicking was driving her a little nuts but that was par for the course when you had a brother who was fascinated by hooves-on activities like Sunburst.
She sighed, leaning back in her chair while he glanced up at the sound.
"I know you're bored. Why not listen to the scanner with me?"
"Because I'm not fascinated by it like you are."
"Hey, I hear all sorts of interesting things. Not cases, but interesting tidbits of information."
Sunset grumbled to herself before she heard hoofsteps approaching the door. Quickly she moved to levitate her fedora onto her head (Sunburst snickered as she almost jabbed herself in the eye and she glared) and look presentable for their possible client. Her brother simply put his belongings into his desk.
The pony who entered was a skinny, elderly earth pony with gray hair and a matching gray coat. A pair of glasses rested on his muzzle, but they did nothing to mask the years of experience behind his eyes. He was a pony that they knew, a detective with the Manehattan police by the name of Munch. As always, he wore a dress shirt, tie, and a black coat that matched his pants.
"Munch," Sunset greeted him. "What brings you by?"
"Not a social call, I'm afraid. I have a case for you."
"Does the captain know you're here?" spoke up Sunburst.
"I cleared it with him. Told him you two were the best in the business. Plus, this is outside our jurisdiction and you have more reach." He sat across from her and pulled a case file out from under his coat. "Missing pony. Name's Babs Seed."
Sunset slid the file across her desk and opened it. The filly pictured had a brown coat and pinkish-red hair with big green eyes. It was obvious that it was a school photo, too.
"What are our leads?"
"She was last seen by a classmate walking home from school. She only lives a block away."
"So we're dealing with somebody who knows her routine. Any ransom notes or anything?"
"Nothing yet. Everything we know is in that file." Sunset nodded. "I can put you in contact with her aunt and uncle. She lives with them and her sister in Hooflyn."
"Thanks. We'll head over there as soon as we can."
"Er... what exactly makes you think this is outside your jurisdiction?" Sunburst inquired.
"If this is a runaway case, there are dozens of places she can go outside Manehattan. She's a member of the most widespread farming family in Equestria and she's close with her cousins."
"Oh. That makes more sense. Thanks, Munch."
"Don't mention it. You two better not disappoint me."
The two nodded and Munch left the office.
"I don't believe that Babs would run away."
Orange Blossom set out a tray of tea and cookies.
"I mean, she had difficulties at school, but what filly doesn't?"
"What kind of difficulties?" Sunset asked as her brother ate a cookie.
"Well..." Orange Blossom sat on the couch across from them. "She hasn't gotten her cutie mark yet and the poor thing is being teased about it mercilessly. Things have gotten better, though."
"Did she ever mention meeting anyone, maybe a new friend?"
"She's made a couple recently, but it's because they're starting a Manehattan branch of a club her cousin Apple Bloom helped create—the Cutie Mark Crusaders." Orange Blossom's eyes widened. "Why, I would surmise that if she were to run away, she'd go to Ponyville. That's where Apple Bloom lives and Babs is closer to her than anybody else outside of Manehattan."
"If you don't mind me asking, where are your husband and your other niece?"
"Sunny is out searching and Mosley is at work. I'm staying here in case she comes home."
"That's exactly the right thing to do." Sunset finished her tea and set the cup down. "Well, here's our card. If you think of anything else, let us know. Let's go, Sunburst."
Her brother nodded.
"Thank you for the refreshments, Mrs. Orange."
"You're very welcome."
Outside the brownstone, Sunset tapped her chin.
"Ponyville sounds like the best place to start. The police have already questioned most of the witnesses, which means it's time for us to head out."
Sunburst nodded.
Ponyville was a nice town, all things considered.
It was currently home to the Princess of Friendship, Twilight Sparkle, and so her castle loomed over everything else. All over, ponies and other creatures were going about their business as usual, not even taking notice of the newcomers as they stepped off the train. Sunset took note of the population, which was nowhere near as large as Manehattan but significantly bigger than her and Sunburst's hometown of Sire's Hollow. It would certainly be easy to hide one small filly among them.
They were directed to Sweet Apple Acres before too long. Knocking on the farmhouse door didn't yield any results as far as a response, so they simply turned to leave and come back later. As they did, however, they heard a loud "hey!" An orange mare wearing a Stetson and a pair of jeans with a green and white shirt.
"What are y'all doin' here?" she asked, pulling a cart of apples along behind her.
"We're here to talk to the Apple family," Sunburst explained, straightening his glasses. "It's rather urgent. I assume you're a member?"
"Darn right. Name's Applejack. If you'll give me a second, I can go find the others."
True to her word, Applejack retrieved the rest of her family and Sunburst and Sunset were led into the living room. The smallest, a butter-yellow filly with bright red hair and a giant bow on the back of her head, was who Sunset assumed was Apple Bloom. But there was no sign of Babs, which meant they had to bear the bad news.
"Now, what's this about?" Granny Smith demanded to know.
"My name is Sunset Shimmer, and this is my brother, Sunburst."
"We're private detectives from Manehattan and we're currently working on a case," Sunburst finished.
"What's a private detective?" Apple Bloom asked.
"We investigate crimes, just like the police, but we can't actually arrest anybody."
"So what crime happened?" Applejack inquired, steering the conversation in the appropriate direction.
"A filly in Manehattan went missing." Sunset pulled a photo out of her jacket. "A filly by the name of Babs Seed."
As soon as Apple Bloom heard the name, she looked ready to cry.
"Babs is missin'?! What happened?!" The stallion named Big Mac held the filly close as she buried her face in his shirt.
"We're not sure. Orange Blossom said this was the likeliest place for her to go. If she's not here, I guess we'll start looking at different places."
"You're sure nothin' bad happened?" Granny insisted. "There are some creatures who will do terrible things ta—"
"Granny!" Applejack hissed in a warning tone, motioning to Apple Bloom.
"Sorry."
"We know as much as the police. Babs was last seen walking home from school and she never got there."
Apple Bloom started to sob and ran upstairs, leaving her family alone with the detectives. Applejack frowned, looking torn between speaking to the newcomers who'd brought bad news or comforting her sister. Thankfully Big Mac went up to follow his youngest sister and left Granny and Applejack to finish the talking.
"Y'all will let us know if ya find anythin', right?" Applejack inquired. "I know Apple Bloom will wanna know."
"We will," Sunburst assured her. Sunset pulled a card out of her jacket, just like she'd done for Orange Blossom.
"Please let us know if Babs contacts you in any way. Come on, Sunburst."
In a town far from Ponyville—far from anything, really—a small filly woke up on an unfamiliar couch.
"Hello?" she called with her thick Hooflyn accent. "Anybody here?"
"Oh, you're up!" a voice said. An earth pony mare with a white coat and a mane striped with brown and pink came into the living room. She wore a rather simple dress that was blue-and-white striped with a dark blue belt around the middle.
"Where am I?"
"Why, you're home, of course!"
"Home? This ain't Manehattan!"
"Of course it's not. A sweet little filly like you, darling, shouldn't live in such an awful awful place! Here you'll have a life unlike any you've ever had before!"
"Neo!" a male voice called from the next room. "Are you done with the filly yet?"
"Not yet, dear! She just woke up!" Neo (the mare, Babs assumed) was smiling so much that it was a miracle her face didn't split in half.
"Well, hurry up!" Babs began to back away.
"Why did you foal-nap me? Please, tell me why!"
"Foal-nap? No no no, we're adopting you! You're my precious little filly now!"
"Neo!"
"Coming, dear!" Neo pulled Babs onto her back and trotted into the next room, where a stallion with a pale blue coat and dark purple hair was waiting. He was dressed smartly in a suit that made Babs feel intimidated, like she did whenever business associates came around back home.
"So, this is the filly?"
"Yes, our daughter!"
"Wait!" Babs protested, but Neo had already started up the stairs to the second floor.
"I'll show you your room and let you get better adjusted while I make dinner. See you in an hour!"
Babs found herself locked into a room that was decorated entirely in pale pinks and purples with plenty of lace and stuffed animals. Sickeningly sweet, in her opinion. The bed was even a canopy bed, like one of her classmates bragged constantly about having. The window was locked, just like the door, and she didn't feel like these ponies were going to hurt her just yet. For now she'd play along with Neo's fantasy and hope that nothing bad happened. Surely they had to have noticed she was missing by now.
When Neo came to get her, Babs was led downstairs to a healthy meal of... well, exactly what she'd expected. A nice salad with plenty of vegetables, rolls, and even a cake sitting in the middle of the table that said 'Welcome home!'
"Blue Moon insisted on the cake," Neo giggled as her husband sat down. "I just made it. I hope you like everything!"
Babs still felt uneasy. Neo was chipper, far too chipper. Plus, she still wasn't sure what had happened in the first place. Or where in the wide world of Equestria she was, exactly.
Her priority now was to survive, and that meant being Neo and Blue Moon's daughter.
She dug in.
Author's Note
Trying out a new type of story. Just roll with it for now.
By the way, this is an AU where creatures wear clothes all the time, so there's that.
So long and thanks for all the fish!
