Wrong Address

by YourUncleFuncle

Rating: teen
Tags: Slice of Life, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Rainbow Dash, Comedy, Fluttershy, Main 6
Length: 3223

When Rainbow Dash accidentally sends an embarrassing item to Fluttershy, she needs to get it back before she can open it.

Rainbow Dash ordered a really personal item that she doesn’t want anypony to know about. When she realizes there is a defect in the order, she intends to return it. Due to a mix up it is instead sent to her friend Fluttershy, and now she must get it back without anypony noticing while there’s a party going on at Fluttershy’s cottage.

Published 2020-07-11 00:00:00 UTC
Last updated 2020-07-13 04:54:14 UTC

The Package

It was a beautiful day in Ponyville, and Rainbow Dash has just gotten done with her weather patrol duties for the morning. It wasn’t very hard today, just a few stray, out of place clouds that needed to be cleared, then she was done. She could just take a nap on a cloud and rest there for a while before she needed to fly down to Fluttershy’s cottage for the get together she and her friends were having.

The blue pegasus landed at her big cloud home with the full intention of going to her room, jumping in her bed, and taking a mid-morning nap. Nopony liked sleeping more than her, and it wasn’t very hard to see why. Clouds made a very comfortable mattress, and most pegasus ponies preferred it to a usual mattress that unicorns and earth ponies use. Rainbow Dash was often seen resting or napping on such clouds when she wasn’t helping with the weather or practicing her tricks. She may have been a hot shot Wonderbolt now, but back home in Ponyville she was known as the biggest napper anypony has ever seen.

Rainbow passed her mailbox before backpedaling as soon as she saw that she had received a letter and a package while she had been gone. She read the addresses on both before continuing, just to make sure it had been delivered to the right place this time.

“Hey, what do you know,” she said to herself, “Derpy got it right today! Good for her!”

She then walked into her house and put the two items on her desk in her room. She hadn’t used it much anymore, but it still could come in handy if she ever needed to write anything. She pulled up a chair and opened the letter, from Fluttershy.

Dear Rainbow Dash, I know this may seem a little late, but I was wondering if you wouldn’t mind picking up some candy on the way to the party. Bon Bon is having a special today and I have my hooves full with the preparations. Thank you so very much. Your friend, Fluttershy.

Rainbow Dash smiled at the sweet letter, making a mental note to swing by the sweets shop beforehand, before looking at the big wooden package.She rolled her eyes as she saw that it had come from her parents, realizing that what was in the letter was probably something really embarrassing. She picked it up

She gasped and silently cheered as she read the return address, and then proceeded to open the box as fast as she could. Inside was a big pillow plush pillow with the image of her hero, Daring Do, laying in a slightly...provocative position. The earthly equivalent of what she had just received is an anime pillow.

Rainbow Dash blushed as she carried the pillow over to her bed, admiring the image that was on it, and setting it down. She was about to turn around to write her reply to Fluttershy when she did a double take at her pillow.

She almost missed a small defect that was on the side of her pillow, where it appeared as though a seam had popped, and there was pillow fluff coming through the hole that was left from it.

Rainbow Dash huffed before taking it and putting it back into the box, hoping to return it and get one without a defect. She then went to her desk and scribbled out a note to whomever got the box, asking to exchange the one she had. Afterwards she placed the note on top of the pillow in the box, placed the top of the box back on, resealed it with some tape she had at her desk, and wrote the words, “return to sender” on the top.

She then got out another sheet of paper and bit down on her pencil to write a response to her friend.

Dear Fluttershy, No problem! I’ll get enough for everyone plus a little more. You know how much Pinkie eats. See you later, Rainbow Dash.

Now baring the package and the letter, she flew both of them down to her mailbox again, placing the letter inside and the package beside it. Satisfied, she quickly flew back up her stairs and into her room and rested on her bed, drifting off to dreams of flying and playing with her pet tortoise, Tank.

Little did she know that the return address from the package had slipped off the box while she was resealing it.

And little did she know that Derpy would be there to collect both of them before she woke up.

After about three hours of napping, Rainbow Dash woke up and stared at her clock. She had about a half an hour before she had to go to Fluttershy’s cottage, so she started to get ready, and by that, of course, she got a snack from her fridge and then flew out the door.

As she flew she admired the view as she passed the lake so shiny and blue and as she descended she flew through the only cloud in the clear sky anew which caused her vision to go askew and to crash into Ditzy Doo.

They were both sent through the sky, flipping round and round and upside down before they both gained their composure, Rainbow Dash a little faster than Derpy.

“Sorry about that, Derpy, I guess my head was a little bit in the clouds. Get it?”

“Good one Rainbow Dash,” Derpy said between giggles, “sorry for crashing into you. I didn’t see you coming.”

“It’s not your fault,” Rainbow said with a smile. “By the way, did you already collect my mail? I saw that the box wasn’t there on my way back out.”

Derpy thought for a second before her face lit up. “Oh yeah! I was ahead of schedule for once so I was able to pick up the outgoing mail faster today! I’m getting a lot better at this job!”

The pride that Derpy took in a job well done made Rainbow Dash smile. “Good for you, Derpy. I’m just glad you managed to send them both so quickly.”

“It wasn’t that hard considering they were both going to the same place.”

Rainbow Dash nodded in agreement before the sentence sunk into her head and she raised an eyebrow. “What do you mean by that?”

Derpy gave her a confused look before explaining, “Well there wasn’t a return address on the box, and when I saw that the letter was going to Fluttershy’s cottage, I assumed that the package was going to the same place, so I delivered them both to the cottage. Sorry Rainbow, but I better be going. See you later!” Derpy then turned around and flew in the direction she was going when Rainbow crashed into her.

Rainbow Dash felt her heart sink into her chest as she realized what that meant. Fluttershy was going to see the pillow!

“Oh no,” she muttered, “that wasn’t supposed to go to her.”

She felt her face heat up as she thought about what her pegasus friend would think if she saw such a sight. She would most likely pass out, knowing how sensitive her friend could be to that kind of stuff. Celestia knows that her friend is quite possibly the most clean minded mare in all of Equestria, and Rainbow didn’t want to expose Fluttershy to something like that.

Added on to the fact was that the party was happening and she didn’t want to be embarrassed in front of them. Fluttershy probably wouldn’t tell their friends anything, but if Applejack or Pinkie Pie found out she might never hear the end of it.

Rainbow Dash turned around quickly and flew off towards Bon Bon’s Candy Shop to get the errand over with as quick as possible. On the way there she kept saying the same thing over and over again.

“I’ve got to get that pillow back.”

Author's Note

I hope you liked the rhyming in that one paragraph. The idea just popped into my head, so it probably sounds a lot different from the rest of the story. Thanks for reading!

The Party

“I’ll take some chocolate, some taffy, and some nutty oats please!”

Bon Bon was slightly startled by the request being almost shouted at her and was even more startled when she turned around to see an anxious, sweating Rainbow Dash. She was clearly in a rush so Bon Bon wasted no time gathering what Rainbow requested before putting them in three separate bags. She then placed them on the counter and looked up to her customer with a smile. “That’ll be six bits, ma’am.”

Rainbow Dash scooped up the bags so fast that at first Bon Bon thought she was about to leave without paying, so she felt relief as the pegasus reaches out her wing and dropped eight bits on the counter. Rainbow then turned around and bolted for the front door, saying “Keep the change,” while going.

Bon Bon scratched her head in confusion before shrugging and happily taking the payment and two extra bits.

Rainbow Dash flew toward the Everfree Forest, still scared that Fluttershy had already opened the package, but still pushing forwards in hopes that she hadn’t. The fact that Fluttershy might be scared for life wasn’t the only thing she was worried about. She had just recently come out as bisexual, and she didn’t want anypony to discover her secret crush on her hero. Also it would be really embarrassing if they found out that she had bought a character pillow, let alone a provocative one, as it sounded something like only Pinkie Pie would do.

If Fluttershy opened that package in front of everypony, they would all probably react in different ways. Fluttershy would probably just pass out in fear. Twilight Sparkle would give her a lecture about controlling her urges. Rarity would pass out just for the sake of passing out. Applejack would laugh and laugh. Pinkie Pie would probably not see the big deal, seeing as she was still a filly at heart and all. Either way all five of her friends would never look at her the same way again.

Rainbow Dash saw that she was approaching her destination, the small cottage at the edge of the Everfree Forest. She landed by the path that led to Fluttershy’s house and ran over to her mailbox. She sighed in relief as she saw that the package was still there.

“Okay,” she said to herself, “now all I have to do is move this somewhere nopony will be able to notice and then pick it up after the party and I’m home free!”

She scanned the area looking for a good spot.

“The hole in that tree? Nah, not deep enough. The side of her cottage? What if anypony decides to go outside?” She then spotted the underside of the bridge that went over a stream in front of her house. “Aha!”

She glanced toward the cottage to check if Fluttershy was coming before taking the package and pulling it with her teeth toward the bridge. She wasn’t able to go very fast, but she was making enough progress that it would be done soon.

“Oh, Rainbow Dash, you’re here!”

Her heart stopped as she turned toward the source of the soft voice. Her shy pegasus friend was standing at her doorway with a soft smile on her face. Rainbow had frozen in her place and did not know what to do.

“Thank you, Rainbow Dash! I didn’t even know I had any mail. I’m so grateful that you got it for me!”

Fluttershy started to walk down the path toward her friend and the package Rainbow Dash analyzed the situation in her head and realized that the best solution would just be to go along with it. So she put a fake smile on and acted like that was what she was intending. “Uh...yeah Fluttershy. I...noticed that you hadn’t gotten it and I thought I’d…be a good friend and get it for you. Heh heh.”

“Well that was very kind of you, Rainbow. I’ll just take this inside now and open it later.”

Fluttershy then wrapped her hooves around each side of the box before lifting it off the ground. “Oh my,” she exclaimed, “it’s much lighter than I thought it would be!”

Rainbow Dash followed her friend, her eyes never leaving the box. She followed her until they went inside and Fluttershy put the package by the wall behind a chair.

“Um, Fluttershy? Aren’t you going to open it?”

She knew that she was really starting to tempt fate, but she thought she could at least draw up a plan if Fluttershy would tell her what she was intending to do with it.

“Well, I thought I could wait until after the party. I think everypony should be here any minute.” Her gaze then turned to the pouches that Rainbow had tied to her abdomen and smiled. “Oh, good, you brought the sweets!”

Rainbow Dash took off the brown sacks of delicious treats, thankful for the change in subject, and gave them to Fluttershy, who proceeded to dump the contents into three separate bowls. Just then there was a knock at the door, and Fluttershy turned to answer it, only to be run over by a pink blur that blazed through the door at top speed.

“Hi Rainbow Dash! Are you ready to get your party on?”

Pinkie Pie had the most excited look on her face that you’ve ever seen on a pony. Granted she always had that look on her face was always like that, but there may have been an extra sparkle in her eye or two this time.

Rainbow Dash didn’t answer but instead turned to the three ponies who had walked into the Door after her, all with treats and drinks of their own for the party. Twilight Sparkle stopped to offer a hoof to Fluttershy, still laying on the floor from the pink explosion.

“I’m okay,” Fluttershy said in a soft voice while being helped up by her friend.

“Wow Fluttershy,” came the southern accent of Applejack, “you did a real bang up job. Look at this here place!”

The others all nodded in agreement as Fluttershy blushed at the complement. Then, as quick as a whip, Pinkie Pie got up, pulled out a record out of nowhere, and put it on the record machine in the corner.

As soon as the needle dropped, Pinkie turned around, eyes wide,, calling out the line that everypony has heard her say a million times:

“Leeeeeeet’s Parrrrrrrtyyyyyyyy!”

And so the ponies began to dance, all caught up in the trance of the song when Twilight Sparkle started a train and the rest of the ponies went along. Then Applejack challenged Pinkie to a dance contest and everypony gathered around them. At first glance Applejack seemed to get in a lead, but soon Pinkie Pie got up to speed. She went into a prance, took a chance, and spun around quick as can be. Applejack’s green eyes widened at her demise as she saw her opponent celebrate her clear victory, and she had to agree. The others started to cheer and they all drew near, and started to do their own dances grinning ear from ear.

During the rhyming, Rainbow Dash has completely forgotten about the box that had been stored behind the chair, caught up in the dancing and cheering. She had gone off to the side to get a drink of punch and maybe a chocolate or two and she noticed Applejack sit down on the chair, clearly exhausted from the dance contest. Rainbow Dash figures that there was no way that she would see the box let alone question it.

Unfortunately for her, luck was not on her side. As soon as the comforting thought had crossed her mind Applejack tilted her head back to rest, and her favorite hat fell on the floor. As she bent over to pick it up, she stopped and her eyes became locked on the box.

“Uh oh,” Rainbow Dash said, quiet enough that nopony could hear her over the music.

“Hey, Fluttershy! What’s this here crate doing here?”

The question had caught everypony’s interest as they all huddled around the package. Rainbow Dash was still by the table trying not to have a panic attack by biting down on her hoof.

“That’s the package I got in the mail this afternoon,” Fluttershy responded, “I wasn’t planning on opening it until later.”

“Oh the masking on the box is absolutely horrendous,” Rarity said dramatically.

Twilight then poked at the box in question with her forehoof “Do you know what could be inside it, Fluttershy?”

“Actually no. I haven’t ordered anything recently.”

“Well that means it’s going to be a surprise for you Fluttershy! And who doesn’t love a surprise? Open it! Open it! Open it!”

Rainbow Dash cringed at the high squeaky voice from the party pony, but that was nothing compared to the fear she felt as she watched Fluttershy’s hoof approach the box in slow motion, or, at least, that’s how it looked to Rainbow Dash.

Rainbow’s eyes darted around as she looked for any possible distraction she could think of, and suddenly, the lightbulb went off in her head.

*C R A S H*

Everypony turned towards Rainbow, who had extended a blue wing out towards the table, knocking her glass of punch onto the floor. There were glass shards and a lot of punch across the floor. She was fortunate that Fluttershy had moved the green rug she normally had in that place in preparation for the party, or else it would have left a big stain.

Fluttershy quickly jumped into action, grabbing a roll of paper towels fast, and cleaning up the spill on the wooden floor. Rainbow Dash and the others tried to help but none of them could really come up with anyway to do so.

After finishing, Fluttershy looked to a guilt-ridden Rainbow who was staring at the ground and digging her hoof at it. “What happened,” she asked, “are you okay?”

Rainbow Dash looked up but looked back down quicker as soon as she caught a glimpse of Fluttershy’s big puppy eyes. She didn’t like to lie at all to any of her friends, but she especially didn’t like to lie to the kind pegasus she had grown up with.

“I...just accidentally knocked over my punch cup...on the floor,” she said, eyes darting around the room and sweat making an appearance on her face. “I’m awfully sorry, Fluttershy.”

“Aw...it’s okay, Rainbow,” Fluttershy said, smiling at her friend, “it was an accident. And accidents happen.”

Rainbow nodded, though she felt terrible about directly lying, more than once, to her friends. While her element was not honesty like Applejack, she was still supposed to be loyal to the end, and telling things that weren’t true didn’t sit well with her.

But it may have bought her some time, any time at all, to draw her friends’ attention away from the box holding perhaps her most deep insecurity…

“Now,” Rarity said, turning her head toward the chair, “about this box.”

...or not.