A Musical About a Musical

by Blue Paratroopa

Rating: everyone
Tags: Comedy
Length: 1237

Pinkie Pie puts on Les Miserables. Chaos and singing ensue.

The Cutie Mark Crusaders, desperately looking for their cutie marks (as always) turn to Pinkie Pie for advice. She suggests putting on a full-blown show, which the Crusaders like the sound of. They choose "Les Mis" and the show is on!

The Great and Powerful Trixie hears wind of this and approaches the Crusaders for a role, only to find that her favorite part is taken, causing her to plot to steal the show herself. Meanwhile, Spike and Twilight clash with Pinkie Pie over the changes that the pink pony is making to censor the show, including turning Spike's role (Javert) into a laughable, harmless, and hammy villain. Will the show go well or will it fizzle?

Published 1970-01-01 00:00:00 UTC
Last updated 2012-08-26 03:44:02 UTC

The Cutie Mark Quest (Again)

Down in Ponyville, there was a certain trio who never seemed to be satisfied. It was the Cutie Mark Crusaders, of course, who were looking for their cutie marks, and were not going to let anything stop them! As always.  But after they had done every search, every trek, every quest, the trail seemed have gone cold and they found themselves back at square one yet again.

Apple Bloom sighed. "Well, the doctor idea didn't work out. What's next, Crusaders?"

Scootaloo threw her little hooves in the air. "I don't know any more!"

"Calm down," urged Sweetie Belle. "We can't get our cutie marks by freaking out…or can we?"

Pinkie Pie hopped over, cheerfully. "I'd like to see that! Let's freak out together!"

Apple Bloom collapsed on the ground. "No thanks, Pinkie Pie. This isn't a game. We really, really, really, wanna get our cutie marks."

(To the tune of "I've Got a Dream" from Tangled)

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Apple Bloom: We've tried dancing, animation

Cooking and aviation

We've even tried out zookeeping and knitting

But despite try after try

We can't help but sit and cry

We just can't find a cutie mark that's fitting

Can't you just see something on my poor bare tushie

Until then, we're all stuck in the dark

We keep dreaming of the day when we finally all can say

We've really got our own cutie marks

All Three: Our cutie marks

Our cutie marks

Apple Bloom: Maybe I have a knack for building arks?

Maybe I was a born painter

Or a sailor or a saint or

Who knows, I've gotta find my cutie mark

Scootaloo and Sweetie Belle: La la la la la la la la la la la la la

Scootaloo: Though I do look pretty cuddly

That girly stuff ain't for me

But I still want a mark to make me cuter

Oh, to get one is my dream

I am about ready to scream

Maybe my mark is all about my scooter

Maybe I was meant to be a famous racer

Dashing all around out for a lark

But I've raced for quite a while

I have made it my own style

And even now there is no cutie mark

All Three: Our cutie marks

Our cutie marks

Scootaloo: I have left so many tracks out in the park

But despite my constant zooming

All I've got is failure looming

I guess that it won't get a cutie mark

Sweetie Belle: There was that time we were salesponies

Apple Bloom: Or that time we explored in the woods

Sweetie Belle: Tried panning for gold

Apple Bloom: Volunteering for the old

All Three: Looked for oil

All that toil

Left us with only boils

Scootaloo: And don't get us started on the carnival…

Sweetie Belle: I've been told I'm good at singing

But the stage fright is stinging

So then I tried my hooves out on some sewing

But the clothes could not be worn

Cause the fabric got all torn

I really should have sensed the trouble brewing

Our cutie marks

Our cutie marks

I wanna think and really make some sparks

I feel that it is my duty

To prove I'm a real cutie

And finally get my dearest cutie mark!

Scootaloo and Apple Bloom: Our cutie marks

Sweetie Belle: Our cutie marks

Scootaloo and Apple Bloom: Our cutie marks

Sweetie Belle: Our cutie marks

All Three: We want something that makes the ponies hark

And all dogs bark

Apple Bloom: So we'll just have to keep going

Scootaloo: Keep our winds of fury blowing

Sweetie Belle: Until we find our precious cutie marks

Apple Bloom: Our cutie marks

Sweetie Belle: Our cutie marks

Scootaloo: Our cutie marks

Apple Bloom: Our cutie marks

Sweetie Belle: Our cutie marks

Scootaloo: Our cutie marks

All Three: Until we find our precious cutie marks!

Yeah!

"I know something you haven't tried…" said Pinkie Pie, in a sing-song sort of voice.

"WHAT?" the trio cried eagerly.

"Musical theater!" Pinkie Pie happily replied.

The trio looked crestfallen.

"We did too try musical theater!" whined Scootaloo. "Remember the talent show?"

"That wasn't real theater," said Pinkie Pie. "I mean a full story with songs and everything! I love musicals! I wish life was like one."

Apple Bloom considered reminding Pinkie Pie of the song they had just performed, but decided not to.

"I have a ton of scripts in my room!" said Pinkie Pie. "I got them at somepony's garage sale, but I haven't had time to read them yet! Come on!"

The Cutie Mark Crusaders hurried after Pinkie Pie. This could be it!

The Story of Jean Valjean

Pinkie's room was an absolute mess! There were books and plays everywhere, practically wallpapering the place!  Pinkie had even built her baby alligator, Gummy, a little fort out of playbooks.

"Pinkie Pie," gasped Sweetie Belle, "your room looks like Twilight's library!"

"Nuh-uh," said Pinkie Pie. "Twilight's books don't have as much alligator drool on them. I just bought all of these this morning! I haven't gotten a chance to go through them, like I said. Take a look!"

The ponies began to dig (literally) through the scripts.

"What's Annie Get Your Gun about?" asked Scootaloo.

"A gunslingin' cowgirl!" Pinkie Pie cried happily.

"Oh boy!" grinned Scootaloo. "We have got to do this one!"

"What's a cowgirl?" asked Sweetie Belle.

"You do not want to know," Apple Bloom replied with a shudder at the idea of somepony riding her while wearing spurs.

"Hmmm," said Scootlaoo, "I just realized that we can't really hold guns anyway. Let's keep looking."

"I've got it!" announced Pinkie Pie. "You three can do Les Miserables!"

"'Miser-ables?'" repeated Sweetie Belle. "That doesn't sound like your kind of show, Pinkie Pie."

"Normally it's not," Pinkie admitted, "but this show is soooooooo cool! There's wars and love and even French ponies!"

(To the tune of the Lidsville theme song)

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Pinkie Pie: In the olden days the bourgeois

Were really living high

They didn't care about the poor

Who had to sit and cry

Some students didn't like the set-up

They decided they would get up

And they'd start a war against the other wealthy jerks

Meanwhile there's another guy

His name is Jean Valjean

He is an escaped prisoner

There's a lot going on

An officer dude wants his head

All cause he stole a loaf of bread

To save his family, he has got a lot of noble quirks

Their plots all start to intertwine, hope it turns out all right

The war begins and all the people start to fight and fight

And fight and fight

And fight and fight

And fight and fight

And fight

Oh the war is raging and Valjean, he gets a lucky break

The officer is captured and the guy begins to quake

But Valjean, he is much too nice

He gives the captive's ropes a slice

The officer can't understand and then…he hangs…himself!

Turning, turning

All of the soldiers die

Turning, turning, turning, turning

So…sad…

But Valjean's kid gets married and

Valjean's afterlife will be grand

Cutie Mark Crusaders: We just found the show we wanna do

There is violence and romance too

Everybody cheer, all right, yahoo

This will be so great, great

Our dreams will soon come true

Yeah, this could really work

Cause when we're done

We might all finally

Get our cutie marks!