Beauty and her Spike

by FlimFlamBros.

Rating: everyone
Tags: My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Main 6, Romance, Spike, Comedy, Rarity, Adventure, Prince Blueblood, Crossover
Length: 58094

True beauty lies within, can Spike and Rarity realize that before it's too late?

“Who could ever love a beast?”

When Spike is rejected by the love of his life because he is a dragon, he’s willing to do whatever it takes to change that. So when a pony of questionable motives offers to change him into a stallion, Spike is more than willing to shake on it. However, there was one small detail that Spike overlooked: He must first find love as a monster; a beast of a dragon, within a year or he will be stuck like this forever… A beautiful Sparity based on the greatest love story ever told, Rarity and Spike learn that what they thought was beauty was only skin deep, and that true beauty lies from within.

Be sure to check out the new My Little Disney Group on FimFiction!

Cover art by Azenge, an Equestria Daily featured artist and overall great guy, check out his deviant art page.

Fan Art! Blazewingthunder My little Disney, The beauty, the beast, and the applejack
Pia-Chan's Beauty and Her Spike
Ckat_Myla's Rainbow Cup
A Dance of Fire and Beauty, a fan song by Socratic Brony

Published 2012-08-26 20:44:03 UTC
Last updated 2013-10-14 21:27:59 UTC

Let's make a Deal, Dragon

[A quick word from me the author. THIS IS NOT A SPIKE TURNS INTO A STALLION STORY. For the love of Celestia, Luna, Faust and Conquest, please trust me on this! Now continue reading!!!]

The little dragon was in tears, he had just had his heart crushed by the mare he had admired so for very long.

“Stupid! Stupid! Stupid!” yelled Spike in his head as he ran away from the Boutique.“You should have seen this coming! Why would a mare like Rarity want to be with a dragon?! Especially a dragon like you?! With your stupid scales, spines and claws, you have more in common with Discord! And everypony hates him!”

He ran blindly, sprinting pass the ponies in town. The odd mare or stallion would give Spike a concerned or confused look, but none pursued him. They just went on with their daily business as Spike continued to run.

“‘If you were a pony, I would have said yes in a heartbeat.’ Those were her words.” He thought to himself. “If I wasn’t a dragon…” he started to ponder. “If I wasn’t a dragon! That’s it! It’ all so simple! Rarity said I was adorable, but I just needed to be a stallion!” he happily shouted. “So that’s what I’ll do.” The dragon, with newfound faith in his heart, quickly made his way to the tree house. “Twilight, Twilight!” he shouted, kicking the door. He saw the unicorn was sitting at her desk, her nose still deep in the book from that morning.

“What is it Spike?” she asked, putting a bookmark in her page. “You seem really riled up.”

“Twilight, remember how you were trying to turn that potato into a flowerpot?”

“Yeah,” groaned the unicorn, “and the potato ended up exploding.”

“Oh right, that was a good dinner!” smiled Spike, licking his lips at the memory. “So do you think that you would be able you could do that with me?”

“Turn you into a potato?”

“What? NO!” exhaled the dragon. “I need you to turn me into a stallion!”

“Excuse me?” asked Twilight. “Why in Equestria would you want to do that?”

“So Rarity can go on a date with me!”

“Oh no,” sighed Twilight. “Spike, what happened?”

“I asked her out on a date,” he said gloomily, “but she said no because I was a dragon.”

“And you think that if you were a stallion she would go out with you?”

“I don’t think, Twilight,” exclaimed the dragon, “I know! She told me so herself. So what do you say? I’m sure it’ll go better than the potato.”

The unicorn took a deep breath, letting out a sad groan. “Listen, even if I could do that spell without turning you into mashed potatoes, I still wouldn’t do it.”

“But why not?!” whined Spike.

“Because you’re perfect the way you are, Spike. You don’t need to go changing yourself just so somepony will like you better, even if that pony is Rarity.”

“But, I love her…” whimpered Spike, taking a seat on the floor and curling up into a ball. “I really do, Twilight.”

“And I’m sure she knows, but turning yourself into a pony isn’t going to change anything,” said the unicorn, putting a hoof onto the dragon’s little shoulder. “Tell you what, I’ll go and talk to Rarity about this and how you’re feeling, maybe she can help me figure out what’s going on.” Twilight levitated her saddle bag towards her, slipped it on, headed out the door. “I’ll be back soon. Please try and forget about it, please.”

She left, leaving the dragon in a small puddle of his own tears. “How can I forget about it? She means everything to me…” He got up from the ground, wiping his nose, “Well, Twilight won’t help me, then I’ll just have to find somepony else!” he proclaimed. “But who?”

He left out the front door, turning to the Everfree forest. Maybe he didn’t need a unicorn to help him out; maybe he needed a wise zebra’s brew. The dragon stepped into the tree line of the forest. He could feel the temperature drop as he entered the shade of the many tree. The Everfree was always a scary place, an overgrown mess of unkempt woods, filled with nasty plants and wildlife, waiting to poison you or gobble you whole. He had to be careful to stay on the trail, and not drift into the unpredictable woods.

“I’m sure Zecora will be able to help me out,” said Spike to himself. “She must have a potion or a plant that can turn me into a stallion.” He continued walking down the path; it kept getting colder and colder, and the light of the autumn sun was fading. “I wonder if I get to choose what kind of pony I could be? A pegasus would be cool, but I hear that earth ponies are super strong…” The air started to get thicker, a thin blanket of fog cutting off visibility. “Rarity’s a unicorn, maybe she would like me to be a unicorn too! Why didn’t she say what she preferred? Does she know how much stress this is causing me….Where am I?”

Spike finally awakened from his monologue to realize that he was in the middle of a spookier part of the forest. The sun was replaced with grey blurriness, thick fog subduing all lines of sight. All that he was able to see was the creepiness of the trees, and their spooky faces.

“W-where am I?” he stuttered, looking around nervously. “This isn’t the path to Zecora’s.”

Grrrrr…

“W-w-what was that?”

Grrrrr…

There was a shuffling in the trees and bushes, the rattling of leaves as something stocked the little dragon. Half a dozen yellow eyes opened up in the darkness, followed by a three sets of shiny white teeth. The three Timberwolves emerged from the woods, glaring at the tasty looking dragon.

“H-h-hey there guys,” stuttered Spike nervously, “L-lovely weather we’re having.” The wolves started to close in on him. “S-stay back! I-I’m a dragon! If you come close, I’ll…” He timidly heaved a breath. “I’ll breathe fire on you!” He spat out his green flames at the highly flammable Timberwolves.

The wolves flinched as they prepared for the fiery impact.

Pffffffft.

The small embers that Spike had managed to spit out fell helplessly to the ground, not even hot enough to burn the grass. But the wolves didn’t know that. With lightning fast haste, the dragon spun around and bolted in the opposite direction of the wolves.

“Not good not good so not good!” panted the dragon as he rushed through the forest. “Gotta get away! Where am I anyways?” He heard the sound of barking and growling behind him, the snarls of the Timberwolves getting louder and louder as they chased after the purple drake. “Faster Spike faster!” He looked behind him, still keeping his pace. The three wolves were gaining on him, and fast.

SLAM!!

Spike had blindly run into something, something hard and made of metal, which was odd considering they were in the middle of the Everfree. He shook his head and looked at what he had unwittingly collided with: a steel gate. A tall, rusty pair of barred gates in the middle of the forest. Spike wasn’t about to argue with what was they were doing there. He scurried to his feet and slipped into the gates, pushing them closed on the other side. The wolves on the other side scratched angrily at the bars and howled over their lost prey as they backed away and started to sink back into the trees of the forest.

“That’s right, you better run!” shouted Spike through the safety of the bars. He turned around to see what exactly required a gate in the middle of the Everfree…

*****

“Knock, knock! Hello?” asked Twilight as she tapped her hoof on the door of the Carousal Boutique. “Rarity, are you home?”

“Just a second, darling!” hummed the white unicorn. Twilight could hear the sound of hoof steps running down the stairs. The door swung open as the fashionista presented herself. “Hello Twilight, what a lovely surprise. Is there anything I can do for you?”

Rarity, we need to talk,” said Twilight bluntly.

“Oh,” responded Rarity nervously. “About what dear?”

“About Spike, what on earth did you say to him?” the lavender mare asked, “Spike comes home after coming back from here and he wants me to turn him into a potato!”

“Eh, a potato?”

Twilight shook her head. “I mean pony! He wants me to turn him into a pony because apparently, you told him you wouldn’t go out with him because he was a dragon!” she growled, her face scrunched up in a frown. “Why would you tell him that? You know how impressionable he can be!”

“Oh dear,” worried Rarity, biting her bottom lip. “I really didn’t expect him to take it that bad…”

“What did you do?” groaned the purple mare.

“Well, you see dear, I really did try to be gentle with him” said Rarity, trying to escape the fiery glare of her friend. “He was awfully sweet, and charming, but then again, he always is. He even gave me a rose.” She looked around for the flower, but couldn’t seem to find it. “Oh, I guess he must have taken it. Regardless, it was quite a delight to see him, as it is with all my friends, so I of course invited him into—“

“Rarity,” grumbled Twilight, facehoofing herself, “just skip to the important stuff please.”

The white mare gave another little sigh, a teardrop leaking past her eye as she hid her face behind her long purple hair. “I broke his heart,” she whispered, “I tried my best to let him down gently. I never wanted to hurt the poor thing, but it just slipped out…”

“What slipped out?”

“That if he was a stallion I would have said yes!” Rarity cried, falling to the ground in tears.

“Rarity!” gasped Twilight. “Why would you say something like that?!”

“I told you it just slipped out!” cried the distressed mare. “I didn’t want to hurt him, he’s so sweet and generous, and it pained me to do this to him!”

“You could have been a little gentler than that!” shouted Twilight.

“There’s no way to be gentle with this!” Rarity bawled. “Do you think I enjoyed hurting Spike?! Because I didn’t!” She was in full blown tears at this point.

Twilight looked at her hooves with guilt. She had no idea that Rarity had taken it so rough, she really did care for Spike, and she wanted to spare her feelings. However, there was still one thing that was not clear to her. “Why?”

The white mare gave a little sniff as she tried to pull herself together. “Pardon me?”

“If you cared about him so much, why not say yes?” asked the lavender mare.

“That’s personal!” the white unicorn snapped. “A lady does not talk about things like that.”

“Is it…” Twilight asked hesitantly, “is it really because he’s a dragon?”

The fashionista said nothing. She quickly turned around and slowly headed up the stairs. “Excuse me Twilight, but I have a lot of work I need to do today, and I’m afraid that I can’t afford to be distracted. Please show yourself out.” She continued up the stairs, and if Twilight could have seen her, she would have seen the tears flowing down her face like a river.

Twilight stood dumbstruck for a few moments, watching her friend head up stairs and disappearing around the corner. She decided to leave and give her friend some space; she must have been dealing with so much right now.

“She just needs a bit of time alone,” she said to herself. “I guess I’ll just have to tell Spike this…” She sighed. “Rarity’s right, there isn’t going to be a gentle way to do this.”

“TWILIGHT! TWILIGHT!” a strained and exhausted voice called out. From the town of Ponyville, Twilight’s four other friends, Rainbow Dash, Fluttershy, Applejack and Pinkie Pie all were running towards her, their faces worried and exhausted. “Twilight, there you are! We’ve been looking all over for you!”

“Hey girls, what’s up?” smiled as her friends walked up to her.

“It’s Spike, Twi!” exhausted Rainbow. “Fluttershy saw him running into the Everfree Forest! Alone!”

“I tried to stop him…” whispered Fluttershy, looking away in shame as if she did something wrong. “But I didn’t want to go into the Everfree alone…I’m sorry.”

“It ain’t your fault, sugar cube,” comforted Applejack. “Y’all did nothing wrong.”

Twilight rushed past her friends in full gallop towards the forest. “Well, come on girls! We have to go find him!”

“But what about Rarity?” asked Rainbow. “Aren’t we going to get her as well?”

“Trust me, she’s has her own problems at the moment…”

*****

“What on earth is a castle doing here in the middle of the Everfree?” wondered Spike.

Beyond the gates that had offered Spike safe haven from the pack of vicious Timberwolves, lay an old, overgrown, mossy castle. It’s walls were covered in vines and other overgrown creepers. The actual structure of the keep was still fairly intact, with only a few cracks in the walls and a couple of loose shingles. It looked abandon, as if no pony had been here for years…

Wanting to get out of the cold, Spike slowly walked down the bumpy brick trail that lead to the front entrance. He noticed the creepy looking gargoyles that kept staring at him, frozen in their stone, yet always watching him. It was creepy. “Why do statues always look like they’re watching you?” the little dragon mumbled to himself as he approached the front door.

Knock, knock, knock.

“Hello?” called Spike, knocking on the door again. “Is anypony there?” He put both claws on the heavy door and started to push. Slowly, the door creaked open enough for Spike to squeeze through. He didn’t bother to close the door behind him; he was a little winded from pushing it open.

The main castle entrance was dark, only the pale blue light from the windows were illuminating the room. All around Spike were old pieces of tables and chairs that had stood there for who knows how long collecting dust. Scattered across the floors were an assortment of house hold items and knick knacks: A brass candle stick, an old wind up clock, couple of teacups, an old metal tankard, a turned over hoof rest, among other things.

“This place could use a good dusting,” muttered the drake to himself. “I bet no one has lived here for a hundred years.”

“Three hundred and thirty seven,” a voice laughed, causing Spike to nearly soil himself. “But hey who’s counting!”

“Who said that!” he asked uneasily.

“Up here! By the stairs!”

He looked up the large marble staircase that lead of to the other rooms of the castle. Standing at the top of the first step of stairs was a pony, his face was mostly hidden by the dirty brown hood he was wearing, but he could see his light lavender muzzle, and his crooked yellow teeth.

“Welcome dragon, to my humble abode,” the mysterious pony greeted, slowly descending the stairs. “Sorry the castle is a little bit dirty, but I don’t entertain much,” he laughed. “Most things can’t find this castle anymore!”

“Well, it is in the middle of the Everfree…” mumbled Spike.

“Really? I haven’t noticed,” the figure said sarcastically. “But where are my manners? I haven’t even offered you some tea!” With a flash of red, a clay teapot appeared in front of him, along with two floating teacups, a sugar bowl and a milk ladle. “Milk and sugar?”

“Who are you?” asked Spike.

“Me?” the pony said, hopping down the last few steps, “I think the real question is who are you?”

“I’m Spike,” the dragon responded, “from Ponyville.”

“Well, Spike from Ponyville,” the stranger said, removing his hood. “You may call me Ding-a-ling.”

His face was a dark purple, in contrast with his lighter muzzle and rotten teeth. His eyes were bizarre, his left eye was yellow with a red iris, while his right eye was blue with a white iris, and they were both rolling around his sockets like pins on a wheel. But his most unusual characteristic was his horn, or at least, he thought it was a horn….

“Umm, what on earth is that?” asked Spike, pointing to the limp thing on top of the pony’s head.

“Oh this?” Ding-a-ling asked, pointing to the flopping member on his head. “Well, this is just my why they call me Ding-a-ling!” he said happily. “Do you want to touch it?”

“Uuh, sure I guess…” said the dragon, carefully reaching out and touching the cold tip. “I’ve never seen a pony with a bell and spring on his head.”

“Guess I’m just one of a kind!” Ding-a-ling laughed, flopping the bell around. “But it has it’s perks!”

“Like what?”

“So what brings you here, little dragon?” the strange pony asked, completely ignoring the dragon. “I imagine that you didn’t come here for the scenery.”

“I was actually running away from some wolves,” said Spike. “I came here by accident.”

“Really now?” pondered the spring headed pony. “Are you sure that was all you were running from? Perhaps you were not running, but searching?” He leaned close to the dragon. “What were you looking for, my little dragon?”

“I…I was looking for my friend, Zecora,” he admitted. “She lives out here in the Everfree.”

“And why would you, Spike of Ponyville need to see Zecora of the Everfree?” asked the lavender stallion.

“That’s…” He bit his tongue. “That’s private.”

“Does it involve a cute mare?”

Spike gasped. “How did you know?”

“I didn’t!” giggled Ding-a-ling, “Until you just told me. So is that why you needed to visit this Zecora? Are you in love with her?”

“N-n-no!” stammered the dragon. “It’s not like that! It’s this other mare….”

“And…” The pony looked innocently at the dragon. “Come on Spike, if you can’t trust a stranger, who can you trust?”

“I guess…” he sighed. “Her name is Rarity, and she’s the sweetest, prettiest, and most generous mare in the world.”

“Then what’s the problem?” asked Ding-a-ling.

“She won’t date me because I’m not a pony. That’s why I was going to Zecora’s, to see if she could make a potion to turn me into a stallion.”

The strange pony started to pout his lips. “What a shame dragon, and I hate to break it to you, but there is no potion that exist that will do that for you.”

“Oh…” sighed the dragon. “Well, it was worth a shot.”

“But I would turn you into one!” Ding-a-ling said happily.

Spike’s heart almost stopped. “What did you say?”

Ding-a-ling smiled as he cleared his throat and started to sing…

“I said why not, what the hay
With a poof! I’ll make your day
Turn into a stallion, nice and strong
Cause honestly, what could go wrong?
I bet you’re asking yourself why,
‘How could I be such a guy?’
To help a dragon that I’ve never met before? ~”

“Well kind of actually…”

“Stop right there, hold the phone!
Any doubts that I should know?
Are you concerned of a price to pay?
A bargain to make, a game to play?
Because I promise you a pact
To not breach our contract.
So what do you say? What do you say?
Will you let me make your day?
And send your worries all away?
So tell me Spike….”

A paper contract appeared in Ding-a-ling’s hoof. “So what do you say, dragon? Want to become a stallion?”

“You can really do that?” Spike asked excitedly. “Can you really make me into a stallion?”

“I don’t know,” cackled the pony. “Can I?”A mirror poof in front of the Spike and into his claw. He stared into his reflection.

“I’m—I’m a-a--” He stared wide eye at the mirror, for in the reflection stared back a purple coated unicorn, with a spikey green mane. “I’m a pony!” He ran his claw—no, his hoof through his newly formed mane and coat, his hard and cold scales being replaced with a warm coat and a soft mane. His eyes were no longer reptilian, but happy round pony eyes. “I’m a pony! This is great, I can’t wait to show Rarity!” But suddenly, the mirror flashed, and when Spike opened his eyes, he was back to being a dragon, a hideous, ugly, grotesque dragon. “NO!! Change me back! Please! I’ll do anything!”

“Then sign this contract,” smiled Ding-a-ling, levitating the paper ad a quill towards Spike. The little dragon glanced curiously at the contract.

To whomever signs this document to will be transformed into whatever their hearts desires, be it a dragon, pony or even a moderately intelligent peacock, whatever best form that their love one desires, the customer shall be immediately transformed into that….

[SIGN HERE] ___________________

Spike quickly skimmed through the rest of it, not really reading after those first few paragraphs. It seemed simple enough and if signing a piece of paper was all he needed to do to become a stallion, then he would sign a million contracts.

“So, do we have a deal?” pondered the pony.

Spike snatched the quill from the air. “Heck yeah we do!” He quickly scribbled his name down on the document. The second he finished dotting his ‘I’ the paper rolled up and away from him. Ding-a-ling started to laugh, falling onto the floor in his hysterical fit. “What’s so funny Ding-a—DOFF!!” Pain struck through the dragon. Spike fell to all four as he felt a tingling in his claws, he raised one up, expecting his digits to shrink, wither away or fall off and his hand become a hoof. But they didn’t.

Instead they started to grow. Each finger shot out, doubling in length and thickness. His normally trimmed and petite claws grew into jagged curved blades. He felt his arm start to stretch out like taffy, and his muscles expanding like balloons, in an almost painful experience.

“Wha- what’s happening to me?!” yelled the dragon, his nose shooting out of his face, forming a long narrow muzzle. “This wasn’t part of the deal!”

“Oh but it was Spike!” cackled Ding-a-ling, “You should have read the contract!”

“I DID READ THE CONTRACT!” roared Spike, clamping his mouth shut with his oversized hands. His high, boyish voice had been morphed into one that was deep and gravelly, like a wild animal or a monster. “THIS WASN’T IN IT!!!”

“Give it another read, then,” said the pony, handing the contract over to Spike, the dragon fumbling with the paper with his new hands. He got it open and started to read.

To whomever signs this document to will be transformed into whatever their hearts desires, be it a dragon, pony or even a moderately intelligent peacock, whatever best form that their love one desires, the signer shall be immediately transformed into that….

HOWEVER, the signer must first be able to find love as the opposite appearance than he/she desired to turn into. Be it troll, toad, or jabberwocky. The signer will live as this altered “beast” until the signer is able to find another one to love, and to have them to love them back, despite their hellish appearance. In which case the signer will be reverted to a form that the loved one so desires.

If however, the signer is unable to find one to accept him/her as he/she is within fourteen months upon signing, then the contract will be terminated and the signer will be not be transformed into their desired form or their original one, and must remain a “beast” for the rest of their days.

[SIGN HERE] __Spike_____________

“WHERE DID THESE WORDS COME FROM?” bellowed Spike as his body started to grow. “I DIDN’T SIGN UP FOR THIS!!”

“I have signed proof that you did!” laughed Ding-a-ling.

“Spike? Is that you?”

Both the dragon and the spring headed pony turned around, standing in the middle of the room were all of Spike’s friends, minus Rarity. They were all gazing at the dragon, expression of horror and amazement stricken across their faces.

Twilight took a few steps forward. “Spike! W-what happened?!”

Ding-a-ling smiled. “The dragon wanted to become a pony, so I made a little deal with him! a little quid pro quo, if you will.”

“Spike…is this true?” asked Twilight, looking at the dragon as his chest bulged out, and his abdomen started to stretch. “Is this all because of what she said?”

Even through the final transformations, Spike was able to shed a tear. “I’m…I’m sorry Twilight,” he whispered, his voice still very loud.

“Don’t feel bad, Spike!” laughed the crazy pony. “You have four hundred and twenty days until this all becomes permanent. That’s plenty of times to break the spell.”

“Break what spell?” asked Rainbow, scratching her head.

“This one!” laughed Ding-a-ling. The room started to become windy, as the mares all screamed in fright as the turbulence picked them up. Rainbow tried her best to keep control but soon a teacup smashed into her face and she vanished in a poof of smoke. As Applejack was doing her best to keep a grip on the ground, the cowpony got knocked in the head with a metal tankard, and she too vanished. Similar fates were bestowed to all the ponies. Twilight collided with an old clock, while Pinkie Pie collided with a brass candle stick, and poor Fluttershy got smacked in the flank with the hoof rest. Each pony was hit with a household object before disappearing.

“What did you do to my friends?!” raged Spike, grabbing the pony with his massive claws, his new freakish body was incredibly strong, even if it was ugly. “I swear to Celestia if you hurt them!—“

“Ohhhhhhhh….”

“…Pinkie?”

From the floor, the strangest thing happened, the candlestick that collided with Pinkie Pie got up and rubbed its head, “Wow, that was weird! I felt all…waxy inside. Hey, does anypony smell something burning?”

The hoof rest got up on all four legs. “Oh, dear…I think we made a mess.”

“AHHHHHH!!” screamed Pinkie, “A TALKING HOOF REST, IT’S MY WORST NIGHTMARE COME TRUE!!”

“Pinkie, is that you, sugar cube?” the tankard ask. “I must have been hit harder than I thought with that tankard cup. I could of sworn that that candlestick sounded just like Pinkie Pie.”

“Applejack...” the clock said, “I think that Pinkie Pie IS the candlestick!”

“AWWW Come on!” complained a tea cup that sounded a lot like Rainbow Dash. “How come I have to be the stupid tea cup?!”

The five enchanted items continued bickering between themselves while Spike stared dumbfounded at them. “What did you do to them?”

“Added them to the contract,” said the crazy pony. “They’ll stay that way until you can complete the contract like a good little dragon... or be cursed forever if you fail.” He started to walk towards one of the windows, “Well, I’ll be keeping in touch with you, dragon. I do wish you the best of luck with your contract, and you can stay in the castle since your residence in Ponyville has been terminated.”

“What do you mean?” asked the large dragon.

“This contract, it’s very special, all who sign it are erased from the minds of all who knew them!
"
“So…our friends…the princesses…Rarity…”

“Have no idea that you or those talking knick knacks ever existed!” Ding-a-ling laughed. “Keeps all this fair, we don’t want you going and telling everyone you use to be a cute little dragon after all.” He gave one final cackle before disappearing, no smoke cloud, no fading into the air, but just disappearing, as if he didn’t exist.

But what he had done was all too real. Spike took a look at the mirror that had once shown him as a pony. Now, all it showed was a monster. A monster with sharp fangs, a long snout, and dark eyes like a demon. A beast that was hideously large, about seven feet tall with its only counter his newly formed muscles. He was a fully grown dragon, the most terrifying creature in Equestria.

“Spike?” The clock that Twilight had turned into hopped next to him. “We heard everything…We’re all really sorry that this happened to you.”

“Don’t be,” muttered the dragon, “it’s my own fault. I should have known that this wouldn’t work. His name was Ding-a-ling, for Celestia’s sake!”

“Don’t be so hard on yourself,” smiled the Twiclock. “We’ll help you break the spell!”

“What’s the point?” sighed the dragon.

“What do you mean? Don’t you want to break the spell?”

“The only way I can do that is if somepony is able to love me, and me to love them back,” moaned the drake, looking back at the mirror. “I’ll only ever love one mare, and that mare will never love me back…I mean look at me, Twilight.” He stared at his hideous reflection.

“Who could ever love a beast?”

Blueblood's Scheme

Over a year later…

Canterlot. A proud monument to everything rich and classy, where the ponies who walked its streets were regal and dignified. There was not one pony that didn’t know the latest fashion or the next big trend that would appear. They knew about all the hottest places in the royal capital and who was who, because here, looks and status meant everything. Those who were tacky or poor were doomed to the lives of an outcast.

Then there was Canterlot Castle, a beacon of democracy, magic, and of course, friendship. The tall marble walls had stood strong and proud over the millennia since it was built. It was home to the great princesses Celestia and Luna, who had ruled Equestria with kindness and fairness over the ages.

But there was a rumour running through the fair city of Canterlot, a rumour that could change Canterlot, maybe even all of Equestria, forever.

“Attention, my little ponies,” announced Princess Celestia. She and her sister were standing in the front courtyard of Canterlot Castle behind a podium. The courtyard was crowded with ponies from the EQD, the local news press. They all had notepads drawn and cameras at the ready, prepared to write down any story and take a picture at any time. “In exactly seven days, it will mark the second millennium of my Equestrian rule, and I am proud to say that they have been years of peace and prosperity.”

“We have had troubles,” said Luna, speaking into her own microphone. “We will not lie. Nightmare Moon, Discord… All tragedies that we have had to face and rise up against.”

“But while there is darkness, there will always be a light to fight back,” Celestia smiled. “And it's with the brave and selfless acts of our hero, the savior of Equestria, and the sole wielder of the Elements of Harmony that we are able to live without fear this day. Our noble nephew, Prince Blueblood!”

There was an enormous roar of applause as the white unicorn cockily trotted up from behind the velvet curtain that concealed the back of the stage. There were loud fireworks as the morning sky was lit up in a flurry of colourful fires and sparkles. He pompously grinned at the crowd of ponies, flashing his bleached smile and flipped his blonde mane, showing off his pampered royal features and his most prized possession: the multi-coloured necklace, adjourned with six shining jewels, the Elements of Harmony.

“Thank you!” Blueblood smugly smiled, turning so the cameras could catch his good side, not like he thought he had one. He adored the limelight, the fame, the glory…the mares. All this attention went straight to his head, and he loved every last second of it. “It’s always a pleasure to address the little ponies; it’s not every day you get to be blessed with the presence of true greatness! So please, don’t feel as if you mustn’t hold your breath.”

“Yes,” muttered Celestia under her breath. "Pity Humility wasn’t an Element.” She quickly put up a smile. “My nephew has truly been a loyal soldier to Equestria and her interests, and for that, we all thank him.”

There were more cheering and photographs as Blueblood struck another regal pose for the cameras.

“And we cannot forget our beloved niece Cadence,” said Luna. “For it was her love that forced back the changeling hordes, and sent Queen Chrysalis deep into the far off plains of the Wicked Woods. She also worked valiantly to stop and defeat King Sombra, blasting his soul back into the shadows on several occasions.”

More fireworks went off as Princess Cadence emerged from the curtains. She, along with her loving husband Shining Armour, both waved at the cheering ponies.

“Thank you all,” smiled Cadence, holding the hoof of her husband. “It’s always nice to see our little ponies.”

Blueblood rolled his eyes. “Suck up."

“Cadence, Blueblood,” said Celestia, looking at both of them. “My most wonderful of nieces and bravest of nephews. You two are the closest that I have had to children, and your aunt Luna’s and my love for both of you is undying…” She turned back to the crowd. “Which is why next week, in the anniversary of my second thousandth, I will be announcing my leave of power.”

There was instantaneous rabble within the crowd. Had the princess actually announced her retirement? Cameras were flashing and pencils were scribbling down the news as fast as lightning.

“Yes,” smiled the princess of the sun. “It has been long overbue that I give myself a little…vacation.”

“We will both be going on an extended leave to the Crystal Empire for our retirement,” said Luna. “But we are quite aware that we will certainly not leave Equestria without a ruler.”

“Which is why after much discussion, me and my sister have come to an agreement as to who shall succeed us prior to our retirement.”

This is it! thought Blueblood as he grinned wickedly. The moment had finally arrived for his aunties to finally retire and give control over to a different pony. Equestria needed a pony that was dashing, good looking, beautiful, handsome, sexy, and of course, drop dead gorgeous. A pony that was powerful, strong, and of course, drop dead gorgeous, and he just so happened to be all those things, along with being drop dead gorgeous.

“It is with great pride that I, Princess Celestia…”

This is it!

“Ruler of the sun and skies…”

This is it!

“Have decided to retire my throne and give it to…”

THIS IS IT!!!!

“My loving niece, Princess Cadence!”

“YEEEESSSSSSS!!!!” screamed Blueblood at the top of his lungs, completely ignorant to the fact that his name was not called. “It’s about freaking time, too!”

His aunt blinked surprisingly; she had not expected her nephew to take her decision with such enthusiasm. “Really? You are happy with our choice?” she asked.

“Of course!” he smiled smugly. “I’ve been waiting for this day for years!”

“Well, we are glad then,” smiled Luna, “We would have thought you would have reacted…less pleasantly.”

“Why would I act like that, auntie?” asked the regal white unicorn. “This is the happiest day of my life!”

He ignorantly pushed passed his Aunt Celestia, standing up on the podium, everypony in the audience staring at the unknowing Prince.

“Citizens of Equestria!” he screamed, his voice raising over the masses. “It is both an honour and a privilege for you to have me as your new ruler!”

“Huh?” wondered Celestia.

“Now, as your new supreme ruler of all ponykind, I have a few changes that I will make—“

“Umm, Blueblood—“

“First and foremost, I shall order the immediate structure of a fifty foot tall golden statue built in my glory—“

“Blueblood—“

“Of course, I’ll have to triple taxes, but in the end I think it will be worth my while—“

“NEPHEW!” snapped Celestia, using her royal Canterlotian voice, a voice she had not used in many centuries.

“Yes auntie?” asked the prince, looking away from the crowd and to his aunt and princess. Celestia leaned in and whispered something into his ear, causing his eyes to contract, and his smile to drop. “WHAT DO YOU MEAN I’M NOT KING?!!?”

“I mean, we will passing on the ruling duties to Cadence and Shining Armour.”

“WHAT!?”

“You’re welcome to still live in the castle with us cousin,” said Princess Cadence, “It’ll be like nothing ever changed for you.”

“But why her?!” whined Blueblood, stomping his hooves on the ground like an enraged child. “Why choose her over me?! I’m the wielder of the Elements of freaking Harmony!”

“True as that may be, you are ill suited for the throne,” sighed the sun princess. “You lack the makings of a true and just ruler.”

“That’s not fair!” complained Blueblood. “I wanted to be king!”

“Please, Blueblood,” gulped Celestia. “You’re making a scene. Everypony is watching…”

The tantrum-fuelled pony stopped to look around his surrounding, every pony from the crowd had fallen silent, and every camera was pointed at him. The prince's face suddenly turned red as he stared directly into one of the cameras.

“Oh, like I care what the peons think of me!” he shouted, storming off the stage and disappearing behind the curtains. “Stupid aunt… Making Cadence queen over me?” he spat his cousin’s name. “I deserve to be queen—I mean king! I deserve to be king…”

*****

“It’s not fair! It’s not fair! It’s not FAIR!!” raged Blueblood. The white stallion prince had fled that awful press conference, and had proceeded to head back into the castle and into his room in the west wing. “Tell me Consort, do you think that I would be a great king?”

“Of course, my lord,” said the red-coated unicorn Consort, who had been Blueblood’s butler when he was just a colt, and later grew to become his advisor. “You would have made a fine King of Equestria.”

“I know, right?” grumbled Blueblood. “It is my birthright… No, my solemn duty for the peons to bask in my glory!”

“Such a loss…” muttered Consort sarcastically. “Well, perhaps when Princess Mi Amore Cadenza is old and grey, or simply unable to rule...”

“That will take too long, you idiot,” groaned Blueblood as he jumped on his bed, lying in a heap of his own self-pity. “I could never outlive an alicorn. I fear…” He looked away histrionically. “I have limited time in this world,” he said, a melodramatic tear falling from his face. “I could have been a much better alicorn than Cadence.”

“You are overreacting, sire,” said the red-coated servant. “Is it really so bad that you were not picked? Now, you can live the rest of your life as it was: rich and carefree, with your usual line of…‘courtesans’ as I prefer to call them, my lord.”

“Ugh, I don’t want the same old things over and over again,” mumbled the young prince. “I want to be king, I want a change, an enrichment!”

“To the lives of your subjects?” asked Consort.

“Don’t be such an imprudent slug. I meant to my own life,” grinned Blueblood as he sat up on his bed. “And it will all be great when I’m king….”

I’m strong, handsome, and regal
Fantastic, by any means
And to rule over Equestria
Is the core of all my dreams.
Unlike my dear old auntie
Who ruled all fancy free
I shall imply, a different law
A law more befitting of me!

Prince Blueblood sprung from the bed, new life in his step.

When I’m king I’ll have the gold,
Such a sight it will behold,
Every penny, bit, and dime
If it’s shiny, then it’s mine!
And I’ll do my very best
To make the average pony jest
As I make them every morning
To wake up to my own glory!
Dot the stars with my own name
To do anything else is just insane.
When I’m king, I’ll get my heart's desire

“And what is that, my sire?”

Everything in this world that isn’t mine!

“But sir, I must ask you…how will you get all of this? You are, after all, not king.”

“I don’t know…” muttered Blueblood. “I could always kill her.”

“That…seems a little dark, considering the situation, and also highly unlikely that you will succeed and not get caught,” said Consort.

“Then what do you suggest?!” barked the prince. “Mr. I-know-everything-about-everything?”

“Well…” thought the red pony servant. “Perhaps if we were to look at what made Cadence a more desirable choice, we may be able to see why Celestia picked her over you, my lord.”

“A brilliant idea!” Blueblood smiled. “I’m glad I came up with it! But, I’m superior in every way imaginable…”

“True of course, Prince Blueblood…” droned Consort. “Except that you’re stupid, ignorant, incompetent, mean, greedy, lustful, lazy, short-tempered, selfish, moody, and overall unpleasant to be around.”

“I got it!” shouted the white stallion. “The one thing that she has that I don’t have is a husband! So I must get one as well!”

“A husband?”

“Yes—I mean NO!!” shuddered the young prince. “I must have a wife, a lower class and peon of a spouse, just like what my wretched cousin has in that filthy Shining Armour.”

“Sire, I don’t think Shining was lower class—“

“Pack my bags, Consort!” announced Blueblood, as he went staring out the window. “It pains me to say it, but I must marry if I am to become king.”

“Very well sire,” nodded Consort, “I’ll have your belongings packed within the hour.”

“Excellent,” he grinned as he gazed out on the landscape. “Somewhere out there is a very lucky mare just ripe for the picking.”

“Where shall we start our search?”

“What’s the nearest cesspool of poverty and lower-class simpletons?” asked Blueblood.

“If you mean what I think you mean, then I would say Ponyville. It’s a small little village only a day away. That is, of course, if you plan to travel by train.”

“Set up my private car, and have it hooked to the next train leading to this ‘Ponyville’ dive,” he laughed. “I’m sure I’ll find a few mares willing to jump on my saddle, and maybe even a wife too!”

“Hilarious, as always sire,” said the servant pony bluntly.

“Now leave,” ordered Blueblood. “I wish to be alone for a moment.”

Consort bowed and obeyed, leaving the room and the young prince alone.

“And when I find you…my little wife,” he said, “when I am king, you will get a one way honeymoon to the royal dungeons!” He laughed. “As if I would ever share Equestria when I’m king!”

Because when I’m king, it will be divine!
When I’m king, Equestria
Will
Be
MINE!!

Quiet Village

The sun rose slowly over the town of Ponyville, birds chirping and all that classic morning stuff. A sleepy white mare stirred in the master bedroom of the Carousel Boutique. Slowly, Rarity got up from the bed, letting out a loud yawn as she stretched away the morning kinks. The mare crawled out of her bed, applied a little makeup (her looks aren’t all cosmetic, you know) and walked down the stairs of her home/boutique.

Stepping outside of her shop, Rarity started along her merry way into town. She felt particularly happy that late autumn’s morning…

“Ponyville, such a quiet village…
Every day… like the one before…
Ponyville… filled with little ponies
And there here to say:”
“Hello!”
“Hello!”
“Hello! Hello!”
“HIIIII!!” (Called Derpy)
“There goes Mr. Cake with his treats as always
The same old spread of goods he sells…
Every day it’s just the same (Hello!)
And it’s getting quite mundane
Oh there must be more to life!”

“Good morning Rarity!”

“Good morning Mr. Cake!” smiled Rarity. “Lovely weather we’re having!”

“It is.”

“Why, it’s so uncanny for it to be so warm this close to winter—“

“That’s nice, dear,” said Mr. Cakes, not really paying attention. “Cup Cake! The baguettes!”

The white mare rolled her eyes as she continued along her way down the streets, and as she trotted two mares that had witnessed the scene…

“Look at that mare, she is so prim and proper
I wonder if she’s feeling well…”
“Lyra why is she so odd?”
“I have no idea, Bonbon”
“Do you want to get a broom?”
“Yes I do!”

“Hello, Colgate! How is your family?”
“Good day, Berry! And how are you?”
“Hey there, Dinky, where is your mother?”
“There must be more than this small town and life!”

The small door of the Ponyville library swung open as Rarity walked in. “Good morning, Bookworm!”

“Rarity!” smiled the tannish unicorn, who had been Ponyville’s residential librarian since as long and any pony could remember. “What can I help you with?”

“I just came back to return this,” she said, levitating a large purple book out of her saddlebag.

“Done your research on foreign fabrics already?” he asked.

“Oh, it wasn’t much that I didn’t already know,” smiled Rarity. “But with having to get the new winter line up soon, I felt it couldn’t hurt to brush up a little.”

“Well, I’m glad it could help,” said Bookworm. “Is there anything else I can help you with?”

“Actually yes!” she replied. “I was wondering if you had something new in the recreational reading department?”

Bookworm laughed. “Not since yesterday,” he said.

“Oh that’s all right,” smiled the white unicorn. “I’ll just take… This one!” She levitated an old book from the top of the shelf.

“The Blindness of Her Aching Heart?” asked Bookworm. “But you’ve read it twice.”

“I know, but it’s just so good!” smiled Rarity. “It makes me remember a better time…”

“When was that?”

“I… oh goodness me, I don’t know, but I feel less alone when I read it.”

“Well, if you like it so much, then it’s yours,” grinned the tan librarian.

“Bookworm, I couldn’t!”

“I insist!” said Bookworm, dropping the book into her saddle bag.

“Thank you, darling!” thanked Rarity, as she walked out the door of the library. She quickly dashed off, not noticing that Caramel, Thunderlane, and Time Turner had all been spying at her through the library window. They quickly acted casual as the refined white mare walked past them…

“Look, there she goes! That mare is picture perfect!
Her very sight fills us with joy!”
“She is the thought of all my dreams!”
“Befitting of royalty!”
“It’s a pity that’s she’s rather odd, that mare…”

Rarity pulled the book out of her saddlebag, examining the worn cover…

“IIIIIIIIIII find this book, enchanting! Every time I look at it I feel…
That there is something missing…
That’s there is something great waiting for me!”

“Now, it’s no wonder that her name means ‘unique’
Her beauty knows no parallel!”
“But like her name impose
She spends her life alone”
“She’s different from the rest of us
She nothing like the rest of us!
She really is a funny one, that mare!”

“Hey look!” shouted Raindrop, as she pointed at the train station. Sure enough, The Friendship Express was pulling up to Ponyville station. “Is that the royal car attached to it?”

At the end of the train station a large ravishing white cart had been hooked from onto the back of the caboose. The golden doors slowly opened and a red carpet shot out, nearly bulldozing a couple of idle ponies. When the carpet had settled down, Consort walked out of the royal cart.

The red-coated pony cleared his throat as he held up a scroll. “Ahem. Presenting his royal greatness, who is also the sole wielder of the Elements of Harmony the one and only Prince Blueblood.”

“Thank you! Thank you!” smiled Blueblood, regally walking out of the train. “Please, don’t feel the need to hold your applause.”

The sudden appearance of a Prince of Canterlot was enough to stir the town up. Almost everypony started to head to the train station, staring and gasping in awe of the prince’s imperial presence.

“Look at them all,” Blueblood whispered to his advisor. “They’re all hideous! I’m starting to think that this was a terrible idea you had.”

“Well sire, you’ve been looking for all of four seconds,” Consort said. “Perhaps we give it another four before we resort to blaming me. sire?”

“Whatever, just help me find one…” the prince grunted.

“Very well,” sighed the red-coated unicorn as he gazed though the town. “Perhaps that grey pegasus?”

“The blonde one?” Blueblood wondered. “What’s wrong with her eyes? She looks like a moron. No, she is far too hideous.”

“Of course, my lord,” mumbled Consort. I thought she looked rather adorable.

“What about that red one?” the white stallion said. “The one with the sandy yellow mane, she’s pretty hot.”

“The bigger one in the back sir?”

“Yes that’s the one!” he smiled. “That’s the girl I’m going to marry!”

“But sir—“

“Look at her, isn’t she the most beautiful peon that you’ve ever seen?”

“Prince Blue—“

“And that makes her the best!” smiled Blueblood.

"Your highness--"

"And don't I deserve the best?" asked the prince.

"Yes but--"

“It’s like I’ve eaten a flurry of butterflies. Consort, what is this feeling? Am I about to vomit?”

“Sir that’s probably love," he said, "but you should really listen—“

“I’m going to go over there and begin the wooing process!”

Consort sighed. “Very well my lord. I will not stand in the way of your ‘mare.’”

“Good,” said the prince, as he started to push pass the crowd of ponies to get to his newly found love. The pony in question had his back turned to Blueblood, so the pony was unprepared to have his flank groped by the hot-blooded prince. “By my auntie’s name, you have a nice firm buttock! I like that in a mare. What is your name, my darling?” cooed the oblivious unicorn.

The large red stallion turned around, frowning at the prince that had his hooves so firmly pressed against his rump. “Big Macintosh,” he growled.

“Holy Aunt Luna, you’re a guy!” gasped Blueblood.

“Eeeyup.”

“I see…” droned the prince, both hooves still pressed against Big Mac’s rear. “You know you have the backside of mare, the legs of one too—“

WHACK!!!

The large red stallion drove both of his back hooves into the face of Blueblood, sending him flying across the town. Blueblood screamed as he landed rather far away into town and into a nearby pile of hay.

“Master Blueblood, are you alright?” asked Consort as he started to trot over to where the prince had landed. “Are you still alive, sir?”

“Ooooh…” moaned Blueblood as he rolled out of hay, strands of straw were stuck in his mane and coat. “Consort, take a list,” he mumbled.

“Of course,” his advisor said, pulling out a small notepad.

“First, schedule a royal bath with lavender and those wonderful little balls that make all the bubbles.”

“Soap bombs?”

“I love those things!” said Blueblood. “And second, remind me to execute that big man-lady.”

“I’ll squeeze it in before your self-idolizing and after your colouring time next Wednesday.”

“Perfect!” smiled the prince. “There’s nothing I love more than executing after a good colouring!”

“I agree,” droned Consort, as he scribbled the word ‘peanut butter’ down for the eighth time. He never actually kept track of all the ponies that the young prince had demanded executed as he would usually forgot about it in less than an hour, finding something shiny to distract him. “But now I suggest we return to the original task at hand.”

“Very well, though I don’t see how we could find a mare… Hello…” Blueblood smiled, as his eyes caught a glimpse of a fine, refined, and rather pretty white mare. “Consort, please tell me that that is not another stallion.”

“That is a mare, my lord,” said his advisor. “Does this one meet your standards?”

“I suppose…” guessed Blueblood. “She’s better than the rest of the riff-raff in this town. Very well. I suppose she meet my needs. Consort, to that mare!”

“Right from the moment when I found her, saw her
I sighed and said she’ll have to do…
For in this town it’s only she,
Who is actually pretty
But still nowhere as beautiful as me!” (Of course, sire)

“Look there, he goes, isn’t he dreamy?
That Prince, Blueblood, he’s super cute!
My heart, it’s stopped, I’m hardly breathing!
He’s such a tall, strong, white and handsome prince!”

Hello! Good Day! Carrot Top, what’s up? Three bits, too much! Amethyst! (She’s leaving!)
Hi Allie Way, how’s Snails, with Snips? That’s good, do tell! Sparkler! (Get the hell out of my way!)
Did you hear? Lyra, Bonbon? The Mayor, she’s bald! Oh my…

“There must be more than this provincial life!”
“That’s why I will make that mare my wife!”
“Look there she goes that mare is strange but special
A most peculiar rarity!
It’s a pity and a sin, she doesn’t quite fit in
Yes, she really is a special mare
A beautiful and stunning girl
She really is a funny girl…
That mare!! (Hello, Hello, Hello!)
Hello, hello, hello!
HELLO!!”

Rarity turned around to see that everypony had snuck up behind her, staring at her curiously. It only took a firm look from her to send them all back on their daily business. Without further distraction, the white mare returned to her book, flipping back to her page.

“You know, some ponies would say that it would be an honour to bask in my presence…”

“Excuse me?” asked Rarity as she turned around, seeing Blueblood closing in in her. “Oh good god no…”

“But you are an exception!” exclaimed the prince. “For it is an honour to bask in our shared beauty. That is, if we were to make beauties with my beauty,” he raised one on his eyebrows suggestively.

“Umm…” the mare laughed nervously. “I’m not sure I understand what you mean. Did you mean…”

“Oh yes.”

“Oh… I’m, umm… Honoured?” asked the mare.

“As you should feel,” Blueblood said. “For it is not every day that a prince of Canterlot, not to mention a prince that is also the sole wielder of the Elements of Harmony, would offer such a thing.”

“Prince Blueblood, it is indeed an honour,” said Rarity. “But I fear that I must be off… Things to do and such.” She had nothing to do that day, but she needed an excuse to get away from that pony.

“Off to where?” he asked. “Did I forget to mention that I’m the sole wielder of the Elements of Harmony?”

“No, you made that abundantly clear—“

“Then why are being so distant, my little eye candy?”

“Like I said,” Rarity quickly said before running off. “Now if you’ll excuse me, I have an appointment.” She left the young stallion there, standing confused in the middle of town as she quickly rushed back to her Boutique. “Oh the nerve of him!” she grumbled. “Does he not even remember The Grand Galloping Gala? Doesn’t matter, he’s still a pig-headed buffoon!”

When she got back to her store, she noticed that there was a brown carriage parked outside, which could only mean one thing. Rarity gulped as she slowly opened the main door. “Hello?”

“RARITY!”

“Mother, Father…” she droned. “It’s so nice of you to drop by.”

Her parents smiled at her as they sat at the kitchen table. Her father Magnum was munching on some burnt toast, while her mother Pearl was humming politely, tapping her hooves to a non-existent beat.

“Well, why wouldn’t we want to drop in on our little Rare-Rare?” her father asked. “Especially considering this the last time you’ll see us in a couple months.”

“Oh no. However will I survive?” Rarity said sarcastically.

“Now keep that fancy attitude you yourself, young lady,” frowned her mother. “You father and I will miss you, you can at least pretend that you’re not ashamed of us.”

“I never said that!”

“Mmm hmm, but you were sure thinking it missy,” teased her mother.

“Where are you going again?” Rarity quickly muttered, doing her best to get the subject off of her.

“FABULOUS LAS PEGASUS!” shouted Magnum, throwing both hooves in the air.

“Your father is going to try his luck at the casinos while I explore the famous strip!” added Pearl.

“Wonderful,” smiled Rarity. “Well it’s been fun, what with the talking and the you being here and the you now leaving.” She levitated all of her parent’s luggage to the door. “It would simply be unladylike to keep you from your holiday, so goodbye! Now. Please.”

“Whoa there nelly, hold your horses,” said her father. “We’re still waiting on your sister. She needs to hustle her bustle if she doesn’t want to get left behind!” shouted Magnum up the stairs.

“I’m coming!” shouted Sweetie Belle. Rarity’s little sister trotted down the stairs carrying a large suitcase in her mouth. She grunted as she struggled to drag the bag down the steps. “I hope I packed enough.”

“Plenty, I’m sure,” mumbled Rarity, helping her sister as she levitated the suitcase and the filly up and down the steps. “Now shoo—I mean, have a wonderful vacation, be sure to write and I’ll be sure to read!”

“You’re not coming with us?” asked Sweetie Belle as she was dangled upside down in an aura of her sister’s magic.
“That’s a great idea!” smiled Magnum. “Rarity, you should come too!”

“A nice family vacation.”

“NOOOOOO!!” screamed Rarity in a very unladylike manner. “I mean, I would love to but I’m just so busy. You know dressmaking and all.”

“But you’re always busy…” whimpered Sweetie Belle. “You never have time for anypony.”

“She’s right you know,” said her mother. “You know there’s more to life than dressmaking. When are you going to find yourself a stallion?”

“Mother, please!”

“Whatever happened to that Prince you were always talking about?” asked her father. “What was his name again? Prince Blueballs?”

“Blueblood dear.”

“Same difference,” shrugged Magnum. “So how about it? Has my little princess met her prince?”

“I would rather not talk about it,” mumbled Rarity. “He is a combination of words that would be most uncouth to say in front of my parents.”

“Oh I’m sure that you’re just exaggerating,” said Pearl. “Nopony can be that bad.”

“Whatever you say mother,” said the white mare, rolling her eyes.

“Are you sure you don’t want to come with us, Rare-Rare?” her father asked. “It would be good to get you out of that bouquet sometimes.”

“Boutique,” corrected Rarity. “And I’m sure. There is simply too much to do and then I would have to pack and that would take forever as I would have to—“

“Can we go already!?” shouted Sweetie Belle, who was already waiting in the carriage for her parents. “She doesn’t want to come, so let’s go!”

Both of her parents sighed. “We’re coming, Sweetie!” they both said, as walked over to the carriage and hooked themselves in. “Are you sure that we can’t convince you to come?”

“Positive.”

“Okay,” nodded her mother, strapping herself into the carriage so she could pull. “We’ll write as soon as we get to our hotel!”

“Goodbye Mother, goodbye Father!” waved Rarity as she hurried back into her shop, slamming the door closed. “Ugh, I despise it when they do that… And I so have friends! There’s…umm… Hmm, this is harder than I thought,” she pondered. “I must have some friends… Somewhere…”

“Well,” said Magnum as he and his wife finally got settled in to their reins. “Are we all ready to go?”

“YEAH!” cheered Sweetie Belle from the carriage compartment. “To Las Pegasus!”

“Well, all right then!” chuckled her father, as he pulled a map out of his blue shirt’s pocket. “Now let’s see… If we take the main road, we should get to Las Pegasus within three days.”

“Magnum dear, isn’t there a faster route?” asked his wife.

“There is,” he smiled, pointing to a large, dark green blob on the map. “Who wants to cut through the Everfree Forest?”

Wedding Bells and Feathers

“There she is, Consort,” smiled Blueblood, spying in the bushes, gazing at a lone pony standing in the middle of the town. “The mare of my dreams just sitting there all alone, just begging for me to sweep her off her hooves and take her back to my castle. I think I may even hold off on throwing her in my dungeon.”

“That’s wonderful sir,” said Consort. “But I must tell—“

“I’m going to do it!” the prince said, jumping out of his hiding spot and looking at his love sitting at the local diner. “Take notes if you want to Consort, you may learn a thing or two about chivalry and courting.”

The red-coated unicorn sighed. “Very well, your highness. Should I take notes from here, or would you prefer if I stand next to you and observe?”

“Stay here, you old colt,” snorted Blueblood. “I don’t need some relic cramping up my style.”

“As you wish, master.”

“Good, now observe,” he said as he crossed the street and walked up to the café. The pony he had his eye on looked at him curiously, scrunching its eye as the young prince took a seat at the table.

“Umm, hello?” asked the pony.

“Hey there good looking,” said Blueblood. “There must be a lot of questions going through your head so let me answer a few. No, you are not dreaming. This is all real and I am the Prince Blueblood.”

“Really? Because I heard that he was in town but I never got a chance to meet him.”

“Well, here I am,” grinned Blueblood. “And I must say that you are one of the most beautiful things I’ve ever seen.”

“What?” blushed the pony. “Y-you think I’m beautiful?”

“The most precious and stunning of flowers in this town of weeds!” said Blueblood. “From the moment I first laid my eyes on you, I knew you were the one! The one to break my cold and bitter heart. You make me want to be a better stallion, to forgo my old and cruel ways!”

“You were cold and cruel?”

“Alas yes,” courted the white stallion prince. “But no more! I would give it all up for you.”

The pony giggled. “I’m flattered, really.”

“Oh I would tear mountains apart and drain the very seas just to see you smile,” smiled the prince. “Tell me… What is your name?”

“Thunderlane,” the pegasus stallion smiled back. “But you can call me whatever you want.”

“I will call you my beloved,” cooed Blueblood.

“Your beloved?” reddened the black stallion, his heart racing faster and faster as he stared into the beautiful eyes of his prince. “Celestia, this is all happening so fast!”

“Do you believe in love at first sight?” the prince asked.

“I do now,” Thunderlane said dreamily, taking Blueblood’s hoof. “I never thought I would find a stallion in my life, and so handsome too.”

“And I the same,” agreed Blueblood. “Who would have thought I could find a mare as perfect as you?”

“What?”

“You, Miss Thunderlane,” grinned Blueblood, kissing the stallion’s hoof. “You are as beautiful as the night, and as radiant as the day.”

“Umm… I’m a guy.”

“Hmm?”

“I’m a guy,” repeated Thunderlane.

“Oh you wit!” laughed the prince, not realizing that Thunderlane was indeed a stallion. “Pretty and funny! I like that.”

“No seriously, I’m a guy,” said the black pegasus. “’Wait, you thought I was a mare?!”

“Well, aren’t you?”

“NO!”

“This joke is getting dry,” muttered Blueblood. “I know that you’re a mare. There is no fooling this iron mind!”

PISSSSSSSSSS

“Ah goddess, my eye!” screamed Blueblood, his eyes burning from the mace Thunderlane had sprayed on him. “What stallion carries around mace? Tell me that, pretty boy!” he yelled, clutching his eyes shut as he rolled on the ground in agony.

“You’re a jerk!” grumbled Thunderlane, spreading his wings and taking off into the sky. As he flew, he looked back only once, shedding a tear over what could have been.

“Sir, are you all right?” called Consort, popping his head out of the bush.

“No, I’m not all right you idiot! I just got maced by a he-she!”

“I tried to tell you sir, but you didn’t listen,” sighed the advisor pony. “But I assume this is that stallion’s entire fault and you would like to put his execution in the schedule?”

“Finally, you’re doing something useful,” mumbled the prince, getting up off the ground. “Consort, I can’t see.”

“A terrible side-effect of mace to the eyes, my liege.”

“I need you to get me back to the train cart so you can wash this out,” said Blueblood, flailing around blindly. “Consort, where are you?”

“Over here, sire,” droned Consort. “I will be your eyes.”

“Be my legs too, will you?” he said, jumping onto the older pony’s back. “I don’t feel like using the royal legs.”

“Yes sir!” grunted the aged unicorn under the weight of the prince. “After we get your vision back, perhaps we should return to Madam Rarity. She seems to be the only female in this town you desire.”

“I suppose…” mumbled the prince. “We are sure she’s female, correct?”

“I am sure, your greatness,” said Consort as he moved in a sluggish pace. “Sir, perhaps we could get to the train cart faster if you were to get off of me.”

“Or…” Blueblood droned, “You could walk faster.”

“Yes, of course…” muttered the red-coated advisor, struggling to stay standing.

“Once you clean me up, I want you to gather the rest of the servants and organize a wedding outside of What’s-her-name’s house.”

“Sire, a whole wedding?”

“Of course!” Blueblood said, “I want to be married as soon as possible.”

“If you say so—Ooof!” grunted Consort, his back finally giving under the weight of the prince as he fell to the ground.

“Such a disappointment,” tsked Blueblood.

“I know…” moaned Consort.

*****

After making their way back to the Royal Train Cart, Prince Blueblood cleaned out his eyes, had a quick colouring session, and had the other servants prim, pamper and groom him back to princely perfection. Meanwhile, Consort was busy trying to snap his spine back into place with the help of one of the maids.

“Now hold still,” grunted the silver-coated maid. “I can’t pop it back into place if you keep squirming around.”

“Sorry, Feather Duster,” said Consort, wincing at the touch of her hoof on his back. “But even your gentle and angelic touch causes me pain.”

“I still can’t believe you would let him ride you like that,” grumbled Feather Duster. “He’s such an impudent pig! He could have seriously hurt you!”

“Yes, well…” groaned the red-coated advisor. “Over the years, I’ve built up a tolerance for idiocy.”

“After all you do for him, after all those years you’ve taken care of him,” said the maid. “He still treats you like a used tissue. You shouldn’t have to stand for that.”

“Feather, I have watched that boy grow up from a cute little foal to an egotistical monster,” sighed Consort. “I don’t know how that really happened. I did my best to raise him, teach him right from wrong, to treat others with respect and kindness, to be generous and honest. But somewhere along the road, he must have gotten lost. I suppose I failed him and feel I must stay with him to make sure his royal dumbness is kept in check.”

“You didn’t do anything wrong,” said Feather Duster. “You loved that colt and he treats you like horse dropping!”

Consort smiled. “Perhaps, but regardless I have my duty, as do you.”

“Yes, and if you stop blabbing for a moment I can do mine,” the silver-coated maid said, adjusting herself behind Consort and wrapping her arms around him. “This may sting for a moment.”

“Whenever you wan—“

CRACK!

Feather Duster pressed down and squeezed down on Consort’s stomach, the sheer force enough to drive his spinal cord back into place. The red unicorn cringed a little at first, but soon found himself at the relief of Feather Duster’s magic.

“Ah…” he sighed, his old muscles relaxing as the maid let go of him. “Much better, thank you dear.”

“Thank me by not letting that dolt Blueblood ride you anymore. You’re over forty years old.”

“Thanks for reminding me,” he laughed. “Don’t worry about me, I’ll be fine, I’ve been doing this for twenty-five years.”

“I still don’t like it.”

“Duties remember?” Consort said. “And my duty now is to see if his royal pain is ready to get married.”

“He found somepony?”

“Sort of… It’s not his first choice but it’s the only choice that was female.”

“Still in the closet, huh?” asked Feather Duster.

“Immensely,” said Consort. “The day he admits he’s a coltcuddlier is the same day I turn into an alicorn.”

“So never,” giggled the maid.

“CONSORT, GET YOUR LAZY FLANK READY TO GO! I WANT TO GET THIS OVER WITH!”

“He calls for me,” sighed the advisor.

“Hey,” smiled Feather Duster, giving Consort a quick little kiss on the cheek. “Don’t let him get to you.”

“I’ll keep that in mind,” he said, walking out of the room to meet Blueblood as they got prepared for his wedding.

*****

“There it is!” grinned Blueblood, once again hiding in the bushes as he stared at the Carousel Boutique, the residence of his soon-to-be-wife. “Boy is what’s-her-face in for the surprise of her life.”

“She sure is, sire,” said Consort. “The last of the guests have arrived. Should we get started?”

“Of course, but first I have to propose to the bride,” he said, laughing at his own joke. “Hey that’s funny! Consort, I want you to write that under funny things I’ve said.”

“Of course, master,” said the advisor pony, scribbling ‘peanut butter’ into his notebook.

They turned around to where Consort had managed to setup and organize an entire wedding within the nearby meadow. Blueblood’s personal chefs were putting the finishing touches on the wedding cake while other butlers and maids were quickly setting up the red carpet, arranging flowers and making sure everything would be perfect. The townsfolk of Ponyville had shown up quite early after catching word that there was going to be another royal wedding and many had always dreamed of seeing such a magnificent event.

“Look at all of them, Consort,” puffed Blueblood. “It’s as if these peons have never seen the glory that is me!”

“Yes…” deadpanned Consort.

“So when I come out of the house with my new little wife, I want you to strike up the band, got it?”

“That is the plan, my lord.”

“Good,” Blueblood smiled, as he adjusted his bowtie. “How do I look?”

“Umm…” mumbled the red-coated pony. “Words cannot express the way you look?”

“Perfect!” he said, as he walked up to the Boutique, knocking on the door, waiting for somepony to open it.
Inside of the shop, Rarity was busy reading over the book she had just got from the library. “I do have friends… don’t I?”

Knock, knock, knock!

“Coming!” she sang, leaving her book open on her current page as she went to check the door, looking through the peephole to see who it was. “Oh great… He’s back,” she groaned, seeing that it was Blueblood. She put up a fake smiled as she opened the door. “Prince Blueblood! How...unexpected.”

“Isn’t it?” he said, letting himself in. “That’s me, just full of surprises.”

“To what do I owe the pleasure?”

“You know girl, there is not a single mare that wouldn’t love to be in your hooves right now,” grinned Blueblood, slicking his mane back.

“Why’s that?” Rarity asked.

“Today’s the day your dreams come true!”

“What would you know about my dreams, Blueblood?”

“Oh, I know plenty…”

You’ve been dreaming just one dreaming, your entire life

Praying to Celestia so you could be a wife!

Could you be some stallion’s property?

Good news! That’s stallion’s me!

This equation: mare plus colt, my mind it does confuse

But on occasions I have found that mares loved being used

Mainly for the bedroom things with me…

FYI I’m big as a tree…

Oh we’ll have ourselves a blast! (Unbelievable)

Check out my rock-hard abs (Egotistical)

As I stuff you with my Blueblood genes! (That’s disgusting)

You’ll clean my castle home! (Lost in his own world)

As I call you my own (Think I’m gonna hurl)

And I’ll let you polish all my crowns and jewels!

“Picture this, my castle in Canterlot, the chef cooking the finest food for dinner, my little wife massaging my hooves as the kids play with the dogs. Oh, we’ll have six or seven.”

“Dogs?”

“No! Strapping colts! Like me!”

“Imagine that…”

Yes it’s true I lust for you like the very sunny sun

My first choice except for that one big red stallion!

You are face with your destiny!

White mare, do tell me…

Unicorn, I know that…

Don’t lie! You know it’s me…

Escaping? There’s no way

I’ll lock all the doorways

Sweet pea, marry--!

“So what’s-your-name? What will it be? Will it be yes? Or will it be, Oh YEEEEESSSSS.”

“I… I just don’t deserve you,” Rarity smiled nervously.

“Of course not!”

“MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!”

“Oh my,” gasped Rarity. “This is all happening so fast… But no.”

“That’s funny!” laughed Blueblood, trapping Rarity at the doorway, placing his front hooves on the door. “But seriously, kiss me!”

“Goddess no!” screeched Rarity, opening the door and side-steeping out of the way as Blueblood fell through the door, landing in a mud puddle outside her doorstep. Rarity quickly slammed the door shut as Consort struck up the band, playing ‘here comes the bride’ as Blueblood emerged from the puddle.

Consort looked at the mud-covered prince, trying his best not to laugh. “So, how’d she take it?”

Prince Blueblood grabbed the advisor by the collar, growling at his sarcasm. “That mare will be my wife if it’s the last thing I do!”

“But you don’t even like her!”

“True, but when I’m king I will be getting everything that I want whenever I want it and I need to get used to that now!” he screamed, flicking his drooping mane as he stormed off. “Burn the wedding and set me up a bath!”

“Should I put the bath bombs in them?” asked Consort.

“Of course I want bath bombs you dolt!” the prince muttered. “Now go start it NOW!”

“Yes sire,” the red-coated pony sighed, looking at the Boutique. “This isn’t going to end well, I just know it.”

Author's Note

Here y'all go! Bunsen did another fine ass job editing this, now to upload this and get to work!

Song is "Me" from the Beauty and the Beast Broadway Musical

later! The FFB

Dungeons and Dragons

“Is he gone?” Rarity whispered to herself, peeking through the window. “Is that ignorant, pig-headed imbecile gone?”

She scanned the area around her boutique. There seemed to have been a wedding prepared right outside her doorstep, but it had been hastily torn apart and abandoned, leaving nothing but a few scattered flowers and an unfinished wedding cake.

“He had the nerve to set up a wedding before I even accepted his proposal? What kind of self-indulged pony would do something so…uncouth?!” she huffed. “Ha! Imagine that. Me, the wife of that egotistical jerk!”

“Princess, Blueblood. Can you just see it?

Princess, Blueblood. His little mare

“No way, not me! I won’t believe it!

There must be more than this provincial life!”

Rarity ran out of her house and into the nearby valley, looking at the horizon beyond the mountains. Equestria was so big, filled with wonders and adventures. Would she ever be able to have more than this life? Or was she doomed to be alone in her routine?

“I want adventure in the great wide somewhere!

I want it more than I can tell!

And for once it might be grand, to have a pony understand

I want so much more than they have planned…”

“Rarity!”

“What am I to do?” sighed the while mare, lazily blowing at a plume of dandelions.

“Rarity!”

“Sweetie Belle, could you be quiet?” droned Rarity. “I’m trying to think—wait a minute, Sweetie Belle?!”

“Rarity!” screamed the little filly, running as fast as she could from across the field, her mother slowly following after her. Pearl seemed to have a bit of a limp in her run, and was being ginger with one of her hooves.

“Mother? Sweetie Belle? What in Equestria is going on?” she called out as she ran to the ponies. “Where’s Father, and what happened to your hoof?”

“We…we were attacked, Rarity!” panted Sweetie, falling to the ground from exhaustion. “Dad… mom and I… we got away… but mom… she hurt her hoof while running…”

“Mother, are you okay?” asked Rarity, looking at her mother’s hoof. It seemed to be badly bruised and was already starting to turn a deep shade of purple. “It looks like you may have broken the bone,” she said. “You need to get to a hospital!”

“Don’t worry about me Rarity! It’s your father that’s in danger!” Pearl said. “He wanted to cut through the Everfree forest to save on travel time.”

“What?!” screamed Rarity. “Is he mad?! Why would anypony trek through the Everfree Forest?”

“You father wanted to save ten minutes on travel time.”

“And you just listened to him?” asked Rarity. “The Everfree is dangerous!”

“That’s…what I said…” muttered Sweetie Belle.

“Where is he now?” Rarity asked.

“He’s still in the Everfree,” Pearl said. “I just pray to Celestia that he’s all right.”

“Mother, take Sweetie Belle home and get some rest,” said Rarity. “I’m going to go find father.”

“But Rarity!” gasped Sweetie Belle. “It’s DANGEROUS. I know you want to save Dad but shouldn’t we just call the Royal Guards or something?”

“There’s no time for that,” exclaimed Rarity. “Besides, if the guards do find him, he’ll think it’s another government conspiracy trying to take his money or time or something else equally as ridiculous. He’ll probably get thrown in jail or an insane asylum.”

“Still, I’m not letting you go!” cried her mother, grabbing a hold of her hoof. “I might have lost my husband today; I will not lose my daughter as well!”

“I’ll be fine Mother, I’ve been in the Everfree before,” Rarity said. “And I know how to take care of myself.”

“You’ve been in the Everfree before?”

“Ye- I think so… Have I?” she wondered, scratching her head. “The memory is a little vauge, but I’m sure I’ve been in the Everfree and came out all right.”

“Are you sure?” asked her mother. “I don’t want you getting hurt or killed.”

“I’ll be fine, really,” said Rarity. “But right now, Father needs my help. Get Sweetie Belle some rest and then go to the hospital and get your hoof looked over. I’ll be back before you know it.”

Her mother sighed, slowly letting her daughter’s hoof go. “Be safe, please.”

“I will be,” nodded Rarity as she rushed away from her mother and sister and towards the edge of the Everfree Forest. She stopped at the edge of the woods, staring into the dark and scary treeline. Rarity gulped as she took a step onto the shadowy path and descended into the trees.

Every step seemed to lead to more darkness. She had no little idea as to where to go, she should have asked her mother where to go. She thought of turning around but by then she was already deep within the thicket of the forest.

“Oh dear…” she muttered to herself. “Am I sure I’ve done this before? Maybe it was just a dream? Ugh, why is my head being so difficult?!”

She continued into the forest, still following the thin dirt road that twisted through the woods. Looking into the trees she saw the thick branches gradually close above her, blocking out the late autumn sun. It would start snowing soon, maybe even today. The mare definitely didn’t want to be stuck in the Everfree when the pegesi rolled in the first winter snowfall.

“Father!” Rarity called out. “Father! Where are you!? Can you hear me!? Oh where could he be?”

Rarity eventually came across a crossroads, one path leading down a sunny and cheerful road, while the other was riddled with dead trees and fog. It didn’t take a genius to figure out her father took the scary one so that’s where she headed, rushing down the cold, dark path.

“Daddy! Father, please say something!” she continued to call as she came across a yellow straw hat lying in the dirt a bit off the main road. “Father’s favorite hat. He’d never just abandon this tacky old thing,” she said, picking it up as she saw pony tracks on the road, most likely belonging to her dad. “Don’t worry, I’m coming!”

The white mare ran as fast as her legs would allow, forsaking her hooves to the dirt and bugs of the Everfree; she needed to find her dad at any cost.

Then she found it.

“A castle?” she said, looking at the large, stony structure of the old castle. “What’s a castle doing in the—never mind. I just pray that father took shelter there. And that he is all right.”

Rarity carefully pushed the creaky gates open, slipping past them and shutting the gate behind her. She walked through the overgrown thicket of the courtyard, being careful not to step in anything too squishy or gross. When she reached the gates, Rarity used her magic to gently pull the doors open and quietly slip inside the dark palace. “Hello?” she called. “Daddy, are you here?”

Her voice echoed through the empty halls, falling on deaf ears. But teacups don’t have ears.

Rainbow Cup had been hopping along her way to the kitchen when she heard Rarity coming through the main entrance. Quickly hiding behind a wall, she spied on the white mare but wasn’t able to get a good look at her.

“Holy cr—I got to tell Applejack!” she said, hopping as fast as she could to the kitchen where Tankardjack was pushing a soapy bucket of hot water across the floor. “Applejack! Applejack! I saw a mare in the castle!”

“Now Rainbow Cup,” sighed Tankardjack. “I’ll not have y’all making up such wild stories.”

“I’m not making this up!” the tea cup yelled. “I really did see a mare by the main entrance!”

“Not another word little lady, now into the tub.”

“Little lady?” asked Rainbow. “What am I, your daughter now?”

“Well I feed you, clean you, and put you to sleep every night…”

“You’re not my mother, Applejack,” muttered Rainbow.

“Not another word, missy,” Tankardjack said, scooping the little cup and plopping her into the bucket. “It’s time for your bath.”

“Aww, but I don’t want a bath!” complained Rainbow as she floated in the soapy water. “I hate baths!”

“I don’t want to hear it, Rainbow,” said the metal tankard. “Now hold still so I can get behind your handle.”

“Up yours!” grumbled the tea cup.

“Hush it, you,” said Tankardjack. “After you’re clean, it’s straight to bed.”

“I hate that stupid cupboard…”

“Oh…hey there you two,” a voice squeaked from the kitchen door, a little hoof rest walking into the kitchen. “I’m not interrupting anything…am I?”

“You sure ain’t Flutterbench,” said Tankardjack. “I was just getting Rainbow here ready for bed.”

“I don’t need help getting to bed!”

“Anywhooves, what’s y’all up to?” asked the beer tankard.

“Oh…umm, I saw a mare in the castle,” Flutterbench whispered.

“Y’all saw what now?!” baffled the tankard.

“Hey! I already told you all of this!”

“Not now Rainbow Cup. Go to sleep,” said Tankardjack. “Now which way did you see her go?”

“Oh… She was heading towards the tower, the one where Spike is holding Rarity’s father captive.”

“Ah horse apples!” she grunted. “If the big guy finds out there’s a mare in the castle… Where’s Pinkie and Twiclock?”

“I think they’re in the hallways next to the library.”

“Well hurry up girl!” said Tankardjack, jumping onto the back of the stool. “We got to go tell them this!”

“Okay,” said Flutterbench, taking off to the library.

*****

“Let him stay the night,” muttered Twiclock said to Pinkie Stick as she shuffled across the table. “Let’s warm him by the fire, sit in Spike’s chair, serve him cider!”

“I was just trying to be hospitable,” shrugged Pinkie. “Had it been a year ago, you would have let me throw him a party.”

“Yes, but now I’m just trying to keep us from getting killed!” said Twiclock.

“But what about the spell?” asked Pinkie Stick. “If we keep kicking ponies out that wander here, how are we ever going to be pony again?”

The wooden clock sighed. “Pinkie… I don’t think that’s going to happen.”

“But Twi-“

“He’s made his decision, Pinkie,” said the enchanted clock. “We’ve tried everything to make him forget, but he’s obsessed with her! He’s convinced that he will never love another mare as much as Rarity.”

“Is that such a bad thing?” asked the candlestick. “We just need to get Rarity here and she’ll break the spell!”

“Pinkie, we are in no condition to walk through the Everfree Forest,” said the clock. “We would probably get eaten by timberwolves.”

“Government Timberwolves?”

“NO,” Twiclock barked. “Timberwolves do not work for the government. Besides, even if we did get past the dangers of the forest, we still have no way to contact Rarity, she doesn’t remember that we exist.”

“Oh yeah…”

“So you see?” she said. “We might as well get used to being knick knacks…”

“Aww…” moped Pinkie Stick. “But I don’t want to be a candlestick!” she cried, wrapping her brass handle arms around the clock. “I want to be a pony again!”

“Me too Pinkie,” said Twiclock, comforting the candlestick. “Me too…”

“Hello? Father?” a strange, familiar voice echoed through the halls. “Where are you?”

“What?” wondered Twiclock. “Was that one of our friends?

“Yeah…” smiled Pinkie as she lifted her head off of Twiclock’s shoulder. “A very old friend! That was Rarity voice!”

“I highly doubt that,” droned the clock.

“No really!” explained the candlestick. “That’s her voice! I remember every voice of every friend I’ve ever met ever! And that’s Rarity’s, I just know it!”

“If that was Rarity, what would she be doing here?” asked Twilight.

“Looking for her father silly!” laughed Pinkie, hopping off the table. “C’mon Twiclock! We need to go say hi!”

“Wha- Pinkie!” yelled Twiclock, following the candlestick off the and following her down the hall, hot on the trail of Rarity.

*****

“Father?” called Rarity as she roamed the halls. “Where could he be?”

Wandering the halls, a door slowly started to creak open. She wondered how it had opened and decided to check it out, slowly opening the creaking door. Within the room was a small spiraling staircase leading up the narrow tower. “Hello?” she called up again as she started her decent upward.

The climb was tiring for the mare, the staircase seemingly going on forever. Eventually though, it did end and at the top of the tower were several piles of hay as well as several cages.

And sitting in one of the cages was an older, moustached pony.

“Father!” Rarity gasped, rushing to Magnum’s cramp cell. “Oh Father, what happened to you?”

“Rarity… Is that really you?” her father croaked, coughing a bit as he spoke. “What are you doing here?”

“I came to find you!”

“What about your mother? And Sweetie Belle?” he asked. “Are they safe? Please tell me they’re safe.”

“They’re fine, Daddy,” she said. “Mother was injured but it wasn’t anything serious.”

“Good, good…” the stallion smiled weakly, coughing a little bit more.

“Father, you’re sick,” Rarity said. “We need to get you out of here.”

“There’s no time for me, Rarity,” Magnum said. “The government’s already got me.”

“Oh goddess not now…”

“This castle is like some sort of prison set up by the government!” her father said. “The government timberwolves scare you deeper into the forest, where you find this castle. That’s when you get lured in by the service and the magical talking furniture robots, but it’s all part of this government plot to STEAL MY TEN MINUTES!”

“Oh my- Daddy, I love you, but you have to stop with the conspiracies. If you don’t tone it down, you’ll get thrown into a loony bin!”

“That’s not the worse part though…” whispered Magnum. “They have a monster as well.”

“A monster? Here?”

“Yes…”

“Where is he?” asked Rarity.

“Right behind you[”

The mare froze as the rough voice chilled down her spine. She wanted to turn around but she couldn’t, her bones had frozen in place, stiff and solid as stone.

“W-w-who’s that?”

“Turn around.”

“Wha-“

“I SAID TURN AROUND!” the voice roared.

Rarity cowered at the creature’s bellow but she slowly obeyed. With shaking legs and a quivering heart, she slowly turned around. “P-p-please… Let my father go,” she begged, looking in the shadows for the voice. She saw a strange silhouette in the shadows, constantly moving and shirting in the dark, never letting her get a good look as the hulking figure examined her.

“It’s…it’s you…” he said.

“Huh?” Rarity wondered.

“Nothing… What are you doing here?” he growled.

“I-I came here to find my father,” she said.

“This stallion is your father?”

“Yes,” Rarity said. “Please sir, he’s sick. He needs to get to a hospital.”

“Too bad!” he yelled. “He shouldn’t have trespassed!”

“I…” she started to say, catching a sparkle of one of his eyes and seeing the green emerald glow of it. “Who are you?”

The figure groaned. “Me?” he asked. “I’m a monster…”

“Step into the light…” she asked.

The large creature slowly stepped into the moonlight of the barred window. His large, scaly foot slid in the dirt. Taking another step to reveal a the leathery torso of purple muscles and scars, followed by a few soft flaps of his wings. He flexed his claws, his razor like talons scratching his broad shoulders. Finally, he revealed his face, long and cruel, overgrown teeth that were stained and yellow, forked like tongue sliding between his lips. And his eyes… The strangely memorizing green tint of his reptilian iris glimmered in the moonlight, a strange mix of hatred and sadness in them as if his soul was tearing itself apart.

“You’re... you're a-.”

“A dragon. Why would you care?” he growled.

“Please…just let my father go, Mr. Dragon,” Rarity pleaded. “I just want him to be safe.”

“He can’t leave… He’s my prisoner.”

“No please! You have to let him-“

“THEN HE SHOULDN’T HAVE COME HERE!”

“Please! I beg of you! I’ll do anything!” cried the mare.

“There’s nothing you can do…” muttered the drake.

“I…” Rarity said, taking a deep breath as she wiped an oncoming tear away. “Take me instead.”

“You!?...” growled Spike. “You… you’d do that for him?”

“Yes,” she nodded, doing her best to fight off the tears.

“That’s…very generous of you,” he said, looking at the mare. Even after all these years, she was still selfless, still caring for others, willing to give her very freedom away to for her dad. It warmed his heart as much as it infuriated it. “You would have to stay forever…”

“And my father?” she asked. “He would make it back home safe?”

“Yes,” nodded the dragon. “So do we have a deal?”

“Rarity! Don’t do this!” her father begged. “I’m old, I lived my life. I don’t want to see you throw yours away for an old stallion!”

Rarity ignored the pleas of her father, stepping up to the imposing dragon, looking up into his feral jade eyes and muttered four life changing words.

“You have my word.”

“Done!” bellowed the dragon, walking past the now crying mare and opening her father’s cage. Her father scurried by the legs of the dragon, hugging his daughter.

“Rarity, no!” wept her father, “You don’t have to do this! I’m old! I’ve lived my life! This is what the government wants you to do!”

“SHUT UP!” roared the beast of a drake, grabbing the stallion by the neck and dragging him out of the tower. “She’s made her decision.”

“Father!” yelled the white mare, watching helplessly as her father was taken away by the purple dragon. “Wait! I didn’t get to say goodbye!”

But Spike couldn’t hear her. He quickly descended down the tower, leaving the walls of his castle and into the courtyard. The ground was beginning to be blanketed with the first few snowflakes of winter as the dragon threw the pony in an old, decaying carriage.

“Take him to Ponyville,” muttered Spike, slapping the back of the carriage.

“Please no!” begged Magnum. “Take me! Leave my daughter out of your governmental schemes.”

“Your daughter is no longer your concern,” growled Spike. “I had my clock enchant this carriage. It’ll take you to town and then disappear.”

“It pulls without a pony?”

“Yes.”

“I knew it!” shouted Magnum. “I knew the princesses were holding back on us! Think of the money you could save on hay prices!”

“Shut it,” mumbled the dragon. “Now go!”

The carriage started to roll away, passing through the gates of the castle and disappearing into the Everfree Forest. All the while, Rarity watched from the tower’s window, witnessing her father disappearing within the trees and bushes. She fell to the ground, a puddle of her own tears forming in the stony floor of the tower beneath her.

“I didn’t even get to say goodbye…”

Author's Note

Sorry for the lack of an actual song. I've been sick with a nasty flu at the time of publsihing and could not get it to work. But next chapter is Blueblood's Song. And there WILL be a song. So sorry for being dead. But I am now back alive.

Pleasing Blueblood

The snow continued to gently fall down outside the tower’s window. Rarity watched the small beads of ice flutter down the landscape, covering it with winter wonder. This was her favorite time of year; she could dress up in her cute little coats and scarves, try on her latest boots and take nice strolls through Ponyville and watch the colts and fillies laugh and play in the snow. It was a magical time of year.

But no more. Now it seemed dead, dormant and depressing. For on the other side of that thin layer of snow lay nothing but death and misery. Leaves would brown and decay, flowers would shrivel up and die, animals hid in fear of the wintery jaws of death. Winter wasn’t the same anymore as she watched the carriage carry her father away from her, back to her old life, a life that seemed like nothing but a faded memory disappearing in the chills of the wind.

She started to cry.

“Father…” the mare sobbed. It was all she was able to whimper past her tears. How had her life come to this? Alone, miserable, and cold in a tower of a greedy and terrible dragon. She could never forgive him for doing something so cruel, so evil.

So greedy.

“Why…why has my life become so pathetic?” she muttered to herself. “Is this my destiny? To spend my days as a slave to some greedy monster? Some beast?” She took a look out the window, the tracks of her father’s carriage slowly fading away, covered by the falling snow. “At least…at least he’s safe,” she sniffed. “I will always love you…Daddy.”

Rarity continued to break down, the miserable emotions washing over her as she saw fit to curl up into the pile of hay as if to die, to close her eyes and be free of this waking nightmare.

Spike watched her silently from the shadows.

He could see how distressed she was and his own feelings seemed mixed and confused. On the one hand, he finally had the mare that betrayed him, the one that caused him an untold amount of misery, pain, hatred and heartbreak. It would be easy to get his revenge on her for what she did to him. She was the monster that made him into one, and he had so many delightful ways to torture her, to make her scream, to do what she did to him and tear her perky little heart out.

On the other hand, this was Rarity. She was his friend, and the feelings that he harboured for her were still very much alive and in a constant conflict with his darker self, the other half that wanted to see her dead in a gutter. But every time he though a nasty thought, there was a flash of hope, a reminder that this wasn’t who he was. He was not a monster, not a freak. He just looked like one.

“What to do with her…” he mumbled, looking down at his claws. Sharp and sleek, they could rip into flesh with ease…

“Umm Spike?”

He blinked. Looking down at the floor, seeing Pinkie Stick lightly tapping at his ankle.

“What do you want?” he growled.

“Well…” smiled the candlestick. “I was just thinking that… Well, the tower isn’t really the place for a lady-“

“But it’s a place for my prisoners,” the dragon barked, making sure to keep his voice down, lest certain ponies were to hear it. “And it’s what she deserves. After all she’s done…”

“Okay Mister Grumpy,” the former party pony said sternly. “I think we need to stop feeling sorry for ourselves and realize the blessing that literally walked into the castle!”

“This isn’t a blessing,” shuddered Spike. “It’s an omen, a curse, a constant reminder of the pain and suffering…and my mistake.”

“Exactly. Your mistake,” said Pinkie. “Not hers. You don’t see the opportunity we have here. She can break the spell!”

“The spell…” sighed the dragon, glancing down at his violet claws. He rubbed his thumb against his fingers feeling the toughened scales that had calloused over the year. He dragged them across his aged and hideous face, massaging his brow as he contemplated his options. “It would never work. She hates me…”

“Yeah, imprisoning her father and then enslaving her kind of does that to a girl,” mumbled the candlestick.

“Shut it,” Spike growled.

“Sorry,” she admitted. “Anyways, I’m just saying that if you were to give her a chance and control your temper, you could fall in love and the spell would be broken!”

“I don’t know… I mean look at me.”

“Spike, it doesn’t matter what you look like,” said Pinkie. “What really matters is what’s on the inside.”

“Unlikely…”

“Look, let’s take baby steps, okay?” the candle suggested. “We’ll start with inviting her to stay in one of the guest bedrooms. I’ve already asked Twilclock to get the others to tidy it up a bit.”

The dragon thought it over. “You think that would work?”

“I’m sure of it,” she smiled. “I know our cute little Spikey is still in there, and I know he would never want to see Rarity get hurt, or to see her sad.”

He sighed, feeling a little defeated. “I suppose… I’ll ask her to sleep in the guest bedroom.”

With another heavy breath, he slowly stepped out of the shadows and made his presence there known.

“Hello…” he said, doing his best to keep the surging anger from erupting within him.

“Ah!” the pony shrieked, shocked from the large dragon’s sudden appearance. “You startled me.”

“Yeah…” he said, drawing circles in the ground with his feet. “So… I was… Just come with me. I’ll show you to your room.”

“M-my room?” the shivering mare asked.

“Do you want to freeze up here in the tower?!” he asked impatiently.

“No…”

“Then follow me,” he grumbled, turning around and crawling to the door. He turned around. “Are you coming or not?”

Rarity nodded her head obediently. “Y-y-yes,” she said, slowly following behind the hulking beast down the stairs to her new life.

*****

“Goddess, I’m depressed…” moaned Blueblood as he dragged his crayon across the paper. It was a little later in the evening, the time for his colouring. He was never particularly good at it, but something about the mix of scribbles and colours tended to make him feel better, like an uplifting joy as all his troubles were lifted away and he could revert to a simpler time without responsibility or worries.

Not that he had any of those.

Consort watched over him. It was always so peculiar to watch him colour, like he was reverting to the little foal he once was and would become more tolerable.

“How’s the prince doing?”

The consort peaked over his shoulder and smiled. “Feather Duster, don’t sneak up on an old stallion like that,” he chuckled. “You could give me a heart attack.”

“You’re not that old…” smiled the maid, “I still love you after all.”

“I’m older than you…”

“What’s a few years?” she giggled.

“Well, twelve is sort of cutting it,” he responded.

“Oh don’t make things weird,” Feather said. “I don’t think of it what way. What is age if not a number? I love you for you.”

“Kind of have to, not like I have anything else,” sighed Consort. “Not like Prince Blueblood or any other royal.”

“Like I care for those things,” the maid said. “I choose to be with you because I love you, not because of your age or for your money.”

“Thanks,” smiled Consort, giving her a quick nuzzle. “Now we still have to deal with the kid.”

“Is he still colouring?” she asked. “It’s been over an hour?”

“He’s depressed, I think.”

“How can you tell?”

“He’s said it like five times already, won’t shut up about it.”

“He’s not good at taking rejection, is he?” she asked.

“Never had to take it before today,” Consort sighed. “Another mistake I made with him, I always gave him what he wanted, never taught him to deal with rejection.”

“It doesn’t matter now, I suppose?” asked Feather Duster. “He is who he is, not like he’ll ever change.”

“I try not to think about it like that,” said the red-coated advisor. “I like to think that we can all change, even in a heartbeat. All we need is somepony worth changing for.”

“Since when are you so philosophical?” laughed the silver maid.

“Come’s with age, I suppose.”

“Stop it,” droned Feather. She turned to look at Blueblood. “How much longer do you think he’ll be like this?”

Consort shrugged. “Don’t know,” he said. “He could be stuck like this for hours. But at least he’ll be quiet till then.”

“Uuuuuuuugh!” groaned the Prince, letting his face slam into the table. “Why is everything so complicated? What does she not see in me? I’m the greatest pony in Equestrian history and the sole wielder of the Elements of Harmony, what is there not to love?”

“Don’t forget his personality of sandpaper,” whispered Feather Duster.

“I need something to cheer me up…” the young stallion muttered. “Maybe I’ll fire some ponies… That usually make me feel better.”

“Oh dear,” sighed Consort. “I think we’ve let him feel sorry for himself long enough.”

“What are you going to do?”

“What I do best,” the red-coated consort said. “Massage his ego back to its normal and somewhat imbecilic state.”

“Fine,” droned Feather Duster. “I’ll get everypony else… You know I only do this because you ask me too. I could hardly care less for this job.”

She turned around and walked away to gather the rest of the servants while Consort stepped into Prince Blueblood’s room. He knocked gently at the wall, alerting the prince to his presence, who responded with only a mellow groan.

“Leave me alone, Consort,” he muttered. “I want to wallow for a few more hours.”

“Sire, you know I have to get you out of this rut,” he said. “It’s not healthy for you to be so depressed. It’s bad for your complexion.”

“Who cares...”

“I do,” Consort said. “And I know we need to get to back on your hooves so we can get you a wife. Don’t you still want to be king?”

“Yes…” the Prince Blueblood mumbled. “That sounds like work…”

The red-coated advisor sighed heavily. “C’mon Blueblood, you have got to put yourself together…”

“Gosh how it pains me to see you, Blueblood, lying around in a slump,

And it’s my job to make sure, Blueblood, you never get caught in a rut,

You’re one to be loved and desired, a legend to outlast all time,

Now come in this room as we all worship you (but most of these things will be lies…)”

“They’re ready for you,” said Consort, leading Blueblood out of his room. Outside of his room the servants were all lined up, every maid, butler and servant ready to amuse their employer.

“No… ones…

Great like Blueblood,

Goes on dates like Blueblood,

Draws poorly drawn pictures of crates like Blueblood!

For there’s no one in town half as stalliony, a portrait, apure paragon…

You can ask any Colgate or Berry,

And they all would agree on what team to be on! (Not yours)

No one’s cool as Blueblood,

Swims in pools like Blueblood,

(Is a giant doofus and a fool like Blueblood)”

“Yes I suppose that I am quite fascinating!”

“No one is quite like Blueblood!”

Give five “Stomp-stomps!”

Give twelve “Hip-hips!”

“If I keep this up longer, I think I’ll be sick…”

“I’ll be right back,” said Consort, looking rather green. “Feather, do you mind?”

“Fine…”

“Slender as Blueblood,

Or as tender, Blueblood,

Confuses stallion’s genders like Blueblood!

For there’s no one as pampered or royal!”

“I enjoy the most bodacious of care…”

Free of all ruffs, kinks, and wrinkles,

“And every last inch of me covered in hair!” (Umm… aren’t we all?)

No one hits like Blueblood!

Has a wit like Blueblood,

No one’s head’s as incredibly thick as Blueblood!

“I’m incredibly good at expectorating!”

Ten points for Blueblood!

“When I was a colt I thought that I was great,

A deity higher than gods!

And now that I’m grown I know I am great!

I’m a monument that deserves to be awed!”

No one swags like Blueblood,

Hits the bag like Blueblood,

… Running out of nice things to say about Blueblood!

“So let’s just all just agree that I am so perfect!”

“No one's quite like... Blueblood!”

The servants were panting in mid pose as their song came to an end, the prince that they had worked so hard to cheer up smiling stupidly to himself.

“I love that song,” he said. “Oh how I feel so much better now!”

“I’m glad to hear that, my lord,” droned Feather Duster. “Shall we resume our regular duties now?”

“I suppose so,” said Blueblood. “Where is Consort? I need to talk to him.”

“I think he retired to the lavatories.”

The Prince didn’t thank her; he just left the servants to their duties. When he approached the doors of the bathrooms, his red-coated assistant walked out, wiping something off of his lips.

“Consort, there you are,” Blueblood said. “Come with me, we’re going back into town to make what’s-her-name my wife.”

“Very well,” said Consort. “It’s nice to see you’ve gotten over your depression so quickly.”

“What can I say? I’m amazing,” the prince said smugly. “Now come on, somewhere out there, what’s-her-name is grieving and lusting over me!”

“I’m sure…” deadpanned the advisor as the two walked out of the train cart. “Shall we head back to her home?”

“Not yet… After carefully analyzing the encounter, I have noticed a critical error in my approach.”

“This should be good,” Consort thought. “And what would that be?”

“I forgot to offer her candy, mares love that!” the price proclaimed. “Which is why we need to get some for her.”

“A wonderful idea,” said Consort. “And I believe that there is a candy shop in town that has exactly what you require.”

“Perfect, be a lamb and fetch the biggest and most expensive case of chocolate and then get me. I have another coloring session soon.”

“As you wish, my lord.”

“HELP! HELP! SOMEPONY HELP ME!”

The shrill and desperate voice cut through the silence of the town. Everypony turned to see a distressed mustached pony running through the streets, wearing a blue Hawaiian shirt and a goofy straw hat.

“Somepony help me please!” Magnum shouted. “He took my daughter! The monster took my daughter!”

Whispers spread through the by-standing ponies. “What are you talking about?” one of them asked.

“A beast!” proclaimed Magnum. “A giant fire-breathing dragon! He took my precious Rarity from me and locked her in his tower!”

Gasps of terror echoed through the ponies. There hadn’t been a dragon problem in their town since… Well, no pony was able to remember, but that wasn’t the issue at the moment.

“Where is this dragon?” asked Lyra. “Is it nearby?”

“It’s in the Everfree Forest!” he said. “We need to rally up the ponies and save my daughter!”

“Excuse me!” said Consort, walking up to Magnum. “My name is Consort, advisor to Prince Blueblood and secretary to the princess. If what you are saying is true, I should send word to Canterlot and inform the princesses about this.”

“Wait…” said Magnum, “You work for the princesses?”

“Yes,” nodded Consort. “If you could just give us your address we could send a carriage to your home and have you tell Princess Celestia yourself.”

“Oh, you’d like that wouldn’t you!” yelled the stallion, backing away from the red unicorn. “You’d like to know where I live and send me to Canterlot where you can throw me into some dungeon because I was on to your conspiracy!”

“Conspiracy?”

“I’ve been onto you and your schemes since the eighties,” growled Magnum. “I know that you sent those Timberwolves after my family, don’t try and deny it! All I wanted was to go on a nice vacation with my family and save some time. But you, the princesses, the government, everypony in the world is trying to squeeze every last bit out of me and take my FREAKING TEN MINUTES!”

“What on earth are you talking about?” asked Consort. “We don’t have timberwolves under our employment. The very idea is just…silly.”

“I’m on to you! I’ve said too much! I need to get out of here!” screamed Magnum, running away. “Can’t go back home, nowhere is safe! The government will get us all! Y-2-HAY! Y-2-HAY!”

Everypony watched as Magnum disappeared from the streets and faded past the cottages and shops. The ponies of Ponyville quickly resumed with their daily business, leaving Consort and Blueblood confused on the road.

“Well that was odd…” wondered Blueblood. “I never knew we had Timberwolves. How come I’ve never heard of them?! Consort, why don’t I have a pack of Timberwolves working for me?”

“Because it’s idiotic,” he said. “And that pony was crazy…”

“Yes…” hummed Blueblood. “He was… Hey what was that other name he mentioned? George or something?”

“You mean Rarity?” asked the advisor. “That’s the name of the mare you’ve been wooing, or trying to at least. She might actually be in trouble.”

“Yes… what’s-her-name…”

“Consort I think I’ve been thinking…”

“Should I be concerned—“

“Oh yes! You see that stallion’s What’s-her-name father,

And his sanity isn’t the best,

Now the wheels in my head have been turning,

As I stared at that kooky old colt,

You see I’ve promised myself I’d be married by now,

And I’ve think that a plan has developed!

“Oh… this isn’t going to end well…”

“Sing it with me!”

“No… one…

Schemes like Blueblood,

Is so mean like Blueblood,

Nothing is as it ever seems with Blueblood!

Soon my wedding is what we’ll be celebrating!

No one’s quite like…

BLUEBLOOOOOOOOOOOOD!”

Author's Note

Edited by my wonderful editor Bunsen, she dun make my work gud!

Madhouse

The snowstorm outside of Ponyville loomed ever closer as shops closed and ponies scurried to get to the warmth and safety of their cottages, closing the windows and locking the doors behind them. Only the bravest or hardiest of stallions and mares dared to walk the streets in this weather, even then donning heavy scarves and winter coats.

Among these brave individuals was a hooded stallion, trekking through the snow. He clenched the worn fabric of his brown cloak, trying to keep the cape from flying everywhere and letting winter’s cold claws grasp him.

“Insane,” he muttered to himself. “What idiot demands a meeting in the middle of a blizzard?”

The wind picked up in intensity, and the hooded pony found himself sliding backwards in the icy streets and almost slipping on a frozen puddle. Luckily, he was able to regain his balance and avoid a serious injury.

“This had better be worth it,” he said, pulling out a letter from his cloak’s pocket. “Meet me at the Shady Troth in the Ponyville Market District… What, this guy needs a drinking companion? The things I do for free beer…” he sighed, squinting as he looked up ahead. He could barely see the colourful sign of the bar, the lights blinking in the white storm. “I swear he better be buying…”

The hooded stallion forced the door open of the bar, the snow jamming up against it as he pulled. He managed to pull it just open enough so he could squeeze through and get out of the cold.

The bar was fairly deserted, with only a few lonely stallions and mares littered here and there, slowly drinking away their worries. Despite being quite vacant it was also very warm, much to the relief of the hooded pony. He shook the snow off of his jacket and wiped his hooves on the rug as he walked up to the bar. The bartender was lazily cleaning a shot glass, not even paying attention to the approaching customer.

“Excuse me, can I get a tequila sunrise?” the hooded pony asked the barkeep.

She glanced over in his direction, placing the shot glass on the table. “Sure thing, give me a moment.”

“A tequila sunrise?” a rather obnoxious voice called from behind him. “I’m surprised a stallion in this town actually has a finer taste in drinks.”

“I don’t like them,” smiled the hooded pony. “But I’ll take it you’re the pony that dragged me from the asylum so late in this winter’s eve?” He turned around, seeing Prince Blueblood and Consort sitting at one of the back booth, isolated and hidden from the rest of the scarce crowd. “Ah, Prince Blueblood, to what do I owe the pleasure.”

“His highness wishes to make an offer to you,” said Consort. “We understand that your time is very valuable but he believes that he can make it worth your while.”

“Hardly, I watch ponies drool and colour all day for a living,” the hooded pony chuckled. “However, I still feel I need to be compensated for trekking out so late in the night…and in the middle of a snowstorm.”

“Right… Consort, give him what he wants,” smiled Blueblood. “Won’t you have a seat over here?”

“I will,” he said, walking over and taking on the other side of the prince. “Now, what have you to offer me?”

Consort reached under the table and pulled out a large, hefty bag of gold bits. “The prince believes that this is a generous offer.”

“Bits?” wondered the hooded pony. “I have no need for money, I have enough to satisfy my every need. Your bits are no good to me.”

“What?!” gasped the young prince. “How can you not like money?!” Money is the greatest thing ever!”

“Relax,” said Consort, trying to calm the prince down. “Perhaps there is something else we could offer you? Perhaps something like this?” He reached underneath the table again, this time pulling of a large, hefty looking beer keg and slamming it on the table. “This here is fifty litres of pure mountain ale brewed in the snowy peaks of the Vanhoover Mountains. Some say it is the finest substance in all of Equestria but it’s very difficult to get an import order without proper connections.”

The hooded stallion stared at the metal keg. “You have just peaked my interest and seized my attention.”

“Perfect,” grinned Blueblood. “So, for my request—“

“You mean your proposal,” interrupted the hooded pony. “I never do requests.”

“Now see here!” growled Blueblood. “How dare you interrupt me, do you know who I am?! You will do what I say or so help me I will sentence you to death for being difficult!”

“Your highness, please,” hushed Consort. “Please control yourself, you need him in order to continue your plan and he can’t help you if he’s dead. And may I also once again say that I am strongly against this plan.”

“No one cares what you think, Consort,” muttered Blueblood, turning his attention back to the hooded pony. “Now, listen up…”

“I am.”

“I would like you to incarcerate a pony for me,” said the young prince.

“And who would this pony be?”

“A maniac by the name of Magnum,” said Blueblood. “He keeps muttering nonsense about Timberwolves and ten minutes. The stallion is clearly a psychopath.”

“Ah yes, Magnum,” sighed the hooded pony. “The eighties weren’t so good to him, if I recall… But he’s no more dangerous than a fruit fly. There’s no good reason to lock him up.”

Blueblood’s frowned. “Consort.”

“Yes sir,” he nodded, reaching up and placing another keg of ale on the table.

“Then again…” grinned the hooded stallion. “If he’s causing his royal highness such distress then it is my obligation as a warden to relieve you of your annoyance. However, if I may ask, why go through all this trouble to put a pony like Magnum away? Personal vendetta?”

“Not exactly,” mumbled Consort. “Again, I don’t like this idea.”

“Quiet you!” scolded Blueblood. “Now where was I? Oh yes, let’s just say that it’s for a very lucky mare.”

“He was shot down twice and can’t take the fact that it happened…” said Consort. “This is all so he can become king and everypony else he’s attracted to is male.”

“I thought I told you to shut up!” yelled the prince. “Why did I even bring you?”

“Because you needed a pony to carry the gold…and the two kegs of beer…and you…”

“Right…” muttered Blueblood. “Regardless, I need you to put Magnum in the asylum unless what’s-her-name decides to be my wife. For you see…”

When a stallion is thwarted, and denied his honeymoon…
Cause the pretty mare he courted, saw right through his ruse,
But the time has come for an evil plan,
For which he comes to this stallion,
Who’s is from the most mystical clan…
From the Madhouse, for Loons,

“You’ll be picking up a pony,”
“Very tightly,”
“Very soon,”
“Do not call this plan phony,”
“His ignorance still booms,”
“How sad, Magnum is not so well,”
“Prepare your most prestigious cell,”
“And lock it up with several spells…
At the Madhouse, for Loons.”

“Do I make myself entirely clear?”
“It’s a shame Blueblood doesn’t realize he’s a que-“(I swear if you don’t shut up!)
“Put that steed away and you’ll have set in motion,”
“A most dreadful plot,”
“Are you in or not?”

“Oh… oh… Oooooooohhhhh!
I love your inclinations!
And I’ll do it all for booze!”
HEY!
“So get ready Magnum pony,
For an extra-long snooze,”
“No turning back now say goodbye,”
“She’ll be all mine!”
“She’d rather die…then have her father cutinized?”
“Huh?”
“I have no good clue…”
“But book the rooms for honeymoons!
“At the Madhouse, for Loons!”

The two stallions cackled manically in the finale of their song as Consort sat uncomfortably in this chair. “Have I stressed that I think this is a terrible idea? I get the feeling that I’m being ignored.”

“Shut up,” barked Blueblood. “We have to get to what’s-her-name’s house before this blizzard gets any worse.”

“Very well, sire,” sighed the advisor, getting up from the booth and picking up the bag of gold. “Let’s get going.”

“Yes, lets!” said Blueblood, jumping onto Consort’s back. “Hurry up, I want to get there today!”

“Sir…” grunted Consort, strained under the weight of the prince. “I thought we talked about this…”

“And I obviously didn’t listen,” replied Blueblood. “Now quit feeling sorry for yourself and get a move on! Her house isn’t that far away from here.”

“Very well…”

Out the three ponies went, traversing into the snowy winds of the storm. It wasn’t a long walk to the Boutique but it was a difficult one. The weight of the prince combined with all the other supplies hindered Consort and forced him to almost crawl in the building snow.

“There it is,” pointed out Blueblood, waving in the direction of the Boutique. “Move faster you old fool!” He jumped off the older stallion and rushed towards the door. With a swift kick, he knocked the door down. “What’s-her-name! Are you in here?” he yelled into the empty halls. The lights were off and the mannequins were slightly dusty. It looked like nopony had been here all day.

“Is she here?” asked the hooded stallion. “What about Magnum?”

“Neither of them are here,” the prince groaned. “Blast it all! It was such a perfect plan, too!”

“Such a shame,” muttered Consort. “Well, we tried. Shall we retire? I’ve grown quite tired and cold.”

“No…it can’t end like this,” Blueblood said to himself. “She has to come back… We just need to wait and be patient.” He smiled. “And by ‘we’ I of course mean you, Consort.”

“Excuse me?”

“Wait outside for her or her father to return to the house,” he said. “When they return, come and get me immediately. Now if you’ll excuse me, I’m going home to have Feather Duster draw me a bath.”

“But I—yes sir…” sighed Consort, walking to one of the lounge couches. “I’ll be sure to fetch you as soon as she gets here.”

“What do you think you’re doing?” Blueblood asked. “You can’t wait inside, that’s illegal!”

“And breaking and entering wasn’t?” chuckled the hooded stallion.

“Shut up, you,” said Blueblood. “The rules don’t apply to me. I am a prince after all. He’s nothing more than a commoner that works for me, and at this particular moment I’d rather not have to find a new one because he was stupid and got thrown in prison.”

The prince headed out the door, walking in the direction of his train cart with the hooded pony and Consort trailing behind. The red-coated advisor stopped shy at the door and took a seat on the steps. It only took moments for him to start shivering, wrapping his own hooves around him for warmth.

“You look cold, friend,” smiled the hooded pony.

“Well it’s not exactly summer,” he replied. “You wouldn’t happen to have a scarf in that cloak I could borrow?”

“Here,” said the hooded pony, untying the collar of his cloak and taking it off. It fluttered in the wind as he passed it to the shivering Consort. “You need it more than I do.”

“Thank you… wow,” gasped the advisor.

“What?”

“I just… Never mind, thank you… What was your name again?”

“My name,” the pony smiled, his yellow teeth stretched in a smile as his faded purple mane flew in the wind, the bell attached to the spring on his head no longer muffled and was freely ringing in the wind. “You can just call me Ding-a-ling.”

Author's Note

Edited by the fabulous Bunsen. Chapter's on the smaller side because A: I wanted to get this scene done and B: Next chapter is going to be big.

Also, a big thank you to ACTASAP for bring this song to my attention. I fudging love this song!

Winter’s Howl and a Dragon’s Grasp

“Be…our…guest!” screamed Pinkie Stick, finishing singing ‘Be Our Guest’ for the eighteenth time in a row. “One more time!”

“Please no!” yelled Rarity, grasping the candlestick and shaking it mercilessly. “If I have to hear that song one more ti—I mean… You don’t want to wear out your voice. You have been singing a lot… So very much,” she muttered.

“Okie doike lokie!” chirped the candlestick. “We’re almost at the dining hall anyways. Oh! And we need to introduce you to Tankardjack and Rainbow Cup as well! They’re going to be so excited to see you again!”

“See me again?” asked Rarity, giving Pinkie a strange look. “I don’t recall ever meeting a ‘Tankardjack or a Rainbow cup before. Are they objects, too?”

Pinkie’s face turned pale, even for wax. “Did I say again? I meant for the first time ever and everything!” She laughed nervously. “It’s not like you’ve ever talked to a household item before.”

“Yes,” giggled the unicorn. “That would be rather odd and I think that I would remember something like that.”

“Phew…” sighed Pinkie Stick under her breath. “That was a close one.”

“What was a close one?”

“Oops! Did I say that out loud?” gulped Pinkie. “I mean to say… Cupcakes!”

“Cupcakes?”

“Cupcakes,” she nodded, jumping ahead of Rarity and Flutterbench. “Flawless recovery,” she snickered under her breath, making sure no pony could hear her. “Anyways, we’re here!” she said, presenting the large wooden doors to the kitchen. “Shall we?”

“Let’s,” smiled Rarity, as she pushed open the door.

The kitchen smelled of fresh and recently cooked food, the aroma of freshly baked bread and biscuits. Flats of food and gems were spread and displayed on the counters or thrown into the sinks and garbage bins. On one of the counters next to a bubbly sink, a large metal tankard seemed to be chasing a small tea cup around.

“Now come now, sugar cube,” said Tankardjack. “Do we have to go through this every time it’s bath time?”

“I don’t need a freaking bath!” shouted Rainbow Cup. “I had one yesterday!”

“Because y’all were filthier than a pig in a manure patch,” mentioned the tankard cup. “And to be straight. Y’all don’t smell like a bundle of petunias today either.”

“What do you expect?! I have to hop around everywhere! But that doesn’t mean I have to bathe every single day! And I especially don’t need you to help me!”

“Oh, don’t be so fussy,” said Tankardjack. “Y’all just like to be difficult. You always were a hard one.”

“What are you talking about?!” growled the tea cup. “When did you get this delusion that you were my mother?”

“Hush it, missy, and get in the bathtub.”

“No! Nononononononono!” screamed Rainbow, throwing her tantrum as Tankardjack grabbed her by the rim. “I don’t want to have a bath! You can’t make me!”

“Quit wiggling,” she grunted. “You’re going to chip the rim of your head!”

“I hope I do!”

“Now that’s a lie, and y’all know it,” Tankardjack said. “Now into the tub.”

With that, the large tankard glass threw the smaller tea cup into the soapy sink. Rainbow screamed as she splashed into the water, sinking to the bottom almost immediately. She lingered there, looking disgruntled at the bottom of the pool, her cheeks puffed up with air. However, Rainbow eventually floated back up to the top of the bowl and exhaled her breath.

“I hate you so much, you know that right?” She said.

“Now don’t be like that, little darling.”

“Oh, I’m sorry, are we interrupting something?” Rarity asked. “I didn’t realize we were interrupting something.”

“What the—Oh my, Celestia!” Gasped Tankardjack. “Shoot my barrel, it’s actually you!”

“Yes… It’s me…” wondered Rarity, a little confused at the talking jug’s statement. “I’m sorry, have we met before? I’m terribly sorry but it seems like everypony…umm, object in here knows me and I’m afraid I haven’t the slightest idea who you are.”

“Well of course not,” chuckled Tankardjack. “But we heard that somepony was in the castle but I didn’t believe it. I guess I was wrong on that one. But shoot, where are my manners? The name’s Tankardjack, and this here little thing is Rainbow Cup.”

“It’s Rainbow Dash!”

“Hush!” Shushed the tankard glass. “Don’t mind her. She’s fussier than a chicken in a frying pan.”

“I see…”

“But here I am, blabbering like a rooster when you’re starved to death!”

“Well, I am a bit hungry,” Rarity admitted. “And if you were to spare anything to eat, it would be greatly appreciated.”

“Of course we can, sugar cube,” smiled Tankardjack, hopping over to the table and to the leftover banquet of food. “We still got lots of food leftover. It’s a little cold, but feel free to help yourself.”

“Why thank you, dear,” said Rarity, walking over to the table of food. She scanned over the delicacies that caught her interests and began to put a plate together. “This all looks incredible. If you knick knacks could have cutie marks, yours would definitely be in cooking.”

“Be sure to eat up, ya hear,” the beer mug said. “Now if y’all excuse me, I have to get little missy here to sleep. It’s much past her bedtime.”

“No!” whined Rainbow. “I am not going back into that cupboard!”

“Rainbow, do we have to do this every time?”

“Yes! Because I hate that cupboard and I hate tea cups!”

“Now see here, Rainbow Cup,” Rarity said, levitating her full plate off the table and turning towards the sink. “It’s very rude to talk to your mother that way.”

“She’s not my mother! That’s the problem!” yelled Rainbow, hopping out of the sink. “She’s gotten this delusion that she’s my mother and won’t stop treating me like a child! And no pony is doing anything about it!”

“Oh…” gasped Rarity, looking back and forth between the two as the awkwardness of the situation grew. “Umm, Pinkie Stick, didn’t you have to show me something important?”

“I did?” Pinkie Stick wondered. “Wow, even I didn’t know that. C’mon Rarity. Bye Tankardjack, sleep tight Rainbow Cup!”

“Fall off a bridge, Pinkie,” grumbled the tea cup.

“See, now you’re all cranky,” mumbled Tankardjack, picking up Rainbow by her handle with her teeth. “I knew I shouldn’t have let you stay up so late.”

“Let go of me!”

The two continued to argue and fight as Rarity, Pinkie Stick and Flutterbench quietly snuck out of the kitchen. Rarity carefully closed the door, making sure not to make a noise and disrupt the two cups.

“Are they always like that?” she asked.

“Oh yeah!” giggled Pinkie Stick. “And that’s not even the worst spat that they’ve had. I remember this one time Rainbow Cup got sick and Tankardjack refused to let her out of the cupboard until she got better. They even had soup and everything, which is weird because TJ carried it around in her head… so it was like she was drinking her brains… Oh my gosh! Rainbow Cup is a zombie!”

“Yes… Well, that’s a mildly disturbing image…” mumbled Rarity. She looked around the castle halls as she took a bit out of her sandwich. It was the first time that she had gotten a good look at the sheer size of the damp, dusty castle. The sheer size of it was almost intimidating to the little pony, making her feel petite in its presence, just like how she felt in Spike’s. “This castle is rather large, don’t you think?” she asked. “And it’s just the six of you living here?”

“Uh-huh,” nodded the quiet Flutterbench.

“Why, there must be a thousand rooms in this castle.”

“More like ninety-three,” said Pinkie Stick. “I got bored one day and counted them all… Twice.”

“Really? That many?”

“Yeah… Hey! Do you know what would be fun? If me and Flutterbench take you on a tour of the castle! Yeah, we haven’t had time to do that yet! Oh, it’s going to be so much fun!”

“Umm, I don’t think that’s a good idea, Pinkie…” whispered Flutterbench. “After all, Spike didn’t even want Rarity to leave her room, let alone go exploring the castle.”

“Fiddlesticks!” laughed the candle stick. “I’m sure that he won’t care as long as we stay away from the West Wing!”

“What is in the West Wing exactly?” Rarity asked.

“Nothing! It’s boring! Who said anything about a west wing? I know I sure didn’t!” Pinkie Stick panicked. “Why would you want to go there when there are so many other wonderful rooms to visit? Like the library… Or the trophy room… Or the fashion studio!”

Rarity’s eyes lit up. “You have a fashion studio in this castle?”

“Yes! With sewing machines and mannequins and everything! Would you like to see it?”

“Yes!” Rarity happily said. “Oh, it would simply mean the world to me if I could practice my dress making again! I was quite the fashionista back in Ponyville, if I do say so myself.”

“Then to the fashion studio! Lead the way, Flutters,” piped the candlestick, jumping on the back of the yellow hoof rest. “Tally ho!” The candlestick rode the hoof stool down the hall and around the corner, disappearing from Rarity’s sight and leaving her alone in the hallway.

“Umm…” she wondered, slowly following the two down the corridors. By the time she rounded the corner Pinkie Stick and Flutterbench were gone. “Hello? Did you two forget about me?”

There was no response.

“Well, how rude,” the mare huffed. “I guess I’ll just have to go and find it myself… Wherever it is.”

Rarity started walking around the halls looking for the fashion studio, but the castle halls and rooms all looked the same. Dank, dark, and daunting. Not the kind of atmosphere that inspired confidence and self-assurance. She could have sworn that everything in this castle had an inch thick coat of dust on it and the statues of armour were watching her every move. Perhaps Pinkie Stick and the others weren’t the only enchanted objects in this castle.

The unicorn eventually found herself staring down at a crossroad of the halls. There was one passageway leading left down to the East Wing, and one leading to the right and into the West Wing.

“Oh, I really shouldn’t…” Rarity whispered to herself as she started heading down the left hallway. “But what is he hiding in that wing?”

Her curiosity got the better of her. She turned around and headed down the West Wing.

It was much darker and creepier than the rest of the castle. The banners that hung from the ceiling were torn to shreds, and the walls had soot marks from fire blasts. The hallway reeked with the smell of blood and brimstone and Rarity was hoping that the bones that scattered the floor weren’t from any domsestic animals or ponies. She should have turned away, but her curiosity kept her leading forward.

When she got to the end of the hall, she stopped. She stared at the large steel doors of the hall, and the large dragon scratches on them. She knew it was a terrible idea to open them, yet she found herself slowly pushing them open.

“Hello?” She whispered into the dark room. “Is anypony there?”

There was no answer.

“Goodness, it’s dark in here…” Rarity said. She focused her magic to illuminate her horn, providing a source of light for the unicorn. “That’s better… Oh my…”

The pony’s eyes widened with horror as she looked at a destroyed gallery of her own image. The walls were littered with torn painting of what looked like to be her, and the stone fragments of her face that were scattered among the ground. They were all sculpts and shots of her life over the past year. Pictures of her shopping, sketches of her working, statues of her sleeping, all of her and all were destroyed. All but one simple statue of her in the center of the room.

She slowly walked up to it. The stone was aged and weathered, so she knew it wasn’t newly made. It was almost like looking into a stony mirror.

“What… What is this?”

“What are you doing here?”

Her heart skipped a beat as she heard a shift in the shadows, and the eerie green shine of the dragon’s eye cutting through the blackness of the room. Spike’s ever intimidating presence emerged from the darkness.

“I asked you what you were doing here!” he sneered. “I told you to stay away from here!”

“What is all of this!?” Rarity barked back, pointing a hoof at the statue of her. “Why does this look like me? Why do all these painting have me in it? Are you stalking me? Am I just some sort of sick game to you? Answer me!”

“I DON’T OWE YOU ANYTHING!” The dragon roared. “I tried to be nice, I try to be a gentledrake like you always wanted me to be! But you never could love me BECAUSE I’M JUST A MONSTER TO YOU!”

“What are you talking about? I don’t even know you! And I certainly do not love you! You’ve done nothing to deserve my love aside from letting me stay in one of the spare rooms rather than a dungeon!”

There was a slight pause as the dragon slowly walked towards her. He stopped right next to the statue of Rarity and placed one of his massive claws on its head.

“You’re dead to me…” he whispered, his grip tightening on the stone head of Rarity. “Get out of my castle…”

“Excuse me—“

“GET OUT!” he roared, the stone head of the statue shattering into dust in his claws. “Get out of here before I roast you alive!”

Rarity ran out of there faster than she had ever run before. Her face was in tears from the terrifying experience as she desperately searched for the exit of the castle.

“I shouldn't have come here! I shouldn't have come here!” the mare cried, bolting down the hall to the main exit. “I need to get out of here!” She rushed to the large doors of the castle and started to push them open.

“Rarity?” a voice behind her asked. “What are you doing?!”

The unicorn peeked over her shoulder to see Twiclock standing behind her.

“I’m sorry, but I can’t stay here anymore!” Rarity cried as she slipped through the crack of the door. “That monster’s been stalking me and tried to kill me!”

She disappeared behind the cold steel of the entrance and disappeared in the snow, leaving Twiclock confused and jumbled.

*****

Spike panted heavily as he stood in his quarters, his blood still hot from Rarity discovering his little secret. Every unforgiving muscle in his body ached with the desire to go after her, to finally end her, and with it any hope of breaking the spell and returning everything back to the way it was. It would at least give him the small satisfaction of finally having her out of his life.

“I should have killed her,” he said to himself. “Finally end this nightmare… That’s all I wanted right?”

He looked at the headless statue of Rarity, next to him. The dust of the head still coursed his palm and small pebbles still laid in his hand.

“That…that’s what I wanted…right? I’m just a boogyman, a freak… A monster…”

"Inside my blackish heart,
That she has torn apart,
There is not a slightest sight of love left…
And yet I sit in here,
Rarity is so near,
I see within her is, utter kindness…
Wonder…
Could I be wrong?
Wrong all along?
But it’s far too late,
Thinking… But pointless…
Cold and heartless,
It was my own fault…
No pony could love me,
No goodness left in me,
Not past my face, not my friends… or her
Why was I so bitter?
How could I not love her?
It was a choice for she and she alone to make
And not made by me.
Long ago I should have seen,
My eternal love for thee,
Careless and so greedy I moved onward!”

“What have I done?! I-I could have hurt her!” he cried, falling to his knees, trying to wipe the ash from his claws. “I’m sorry! I’m sorry! I sorry!”

No, goddess redeems me!
No, pain undeserving!
No point anymore, if I can’t love her
No time to say sorry,
Is this the end to my story?
How I wished it could have ended with her and me together…
But it's not to be,
If I can't love her,
Let the world be done with me…

“I’m so sorry, Rarity…”

*****

Rarity tried her best to press against the blistering wind of the stirring blizzard, her hooves buried in the snow. She wished that she had taken the time to grab a scarf or a cloak to help protect her from winter’s grasp but she dared not to go back to the castle and the monster within. It was a shame that those poor enchanted items were stuck in that castle with that beast, she would have to inform the proper authorities once she got back to Ponyville.

Ponyville… it was her home, her parents were there, as well as her little sister and her… her home… What did she really have back at Ponyville besides those three things? It was a little sad to admit but those knick knacks back at the palace were the first things that she had had a conversation with other than her parents or a customer since she was a foal.

She shook away those thoughts from her head. Right now was the time to focus on getting back home through the snow.

But little did she know, she wasn’t alone. From the shadows of the trees and in the mist of the white ice and powder, several pairs of glowing yellow eyes glared dimly in the forest, staring at the lost white mare. The Timberwolves of the Everfree forest stalked the unicorn with hungry eyes. The biggest wolf, most likely the alpha male stepped up to a nearby old tree stump.

And picked up the radio sitting on top of it.

“Mother Den, this is Big Bad Wolf,” the Timberwolf said. “We have visuals on a lone sheep wandering off the path, I repeat we have a pony taking the quickie route.”

“Big Bad Wolf, this is Mother Den,” said a voice that sounded a lot like Princess Celestia. “Could you repeat that last bit? We’re getting interference from the storm.”

“We have a pony that taking the old road through the Everfree Forest, probably trying to save the ten minute travel time and bypass the Hay’ n’ Eat hay station.”

There was a sigh on the radio. “When will ponies learn…?”

“Mother Den, I request permission to engage the target,” the wolf said.

“Threat level?” The radio asked.

“Minimal, just one mare, probably just got lost in the snow. We’ll scare her back to the main roads on the other side of the forest.”

“Roger that, Big Bad Wolf. Be advised that you are restricted against using any force of any kind.”

“Read you loud and clear, Mother Den,” the wolf said. “I’ll dispatch a team immediately. We’ll report back in few minutes with an update.”

“Roger that. Good luck, Big Bad Wolf.”

The timberwolf clicked the radio off and placed it back on the bench and then turned around to face the rest of his pack. “Alright, Beta Pack, you know the drill, scare tactics only and keep your claws to yourselves, we don’t want another Isaac incident.”

“Umm, what happened to Isaac?” a young wolf whispered to another.

“You don’t want to know, kid,” the other wolf said.

“Sergeant Bruno, what are you doing?” the wolf leader asked.

“Sir, I was just informing the rookie about the Isaac incident.”

“Rookie?” Wondered the wolf leader. “Wait… You’re from Johnson’s unit aren’t you? What was your name again?”

“Martinez, sir,” the young Timberwolf said.

“Well Martinez, stick to my orders and you should do just fine,” the leader said. “I expect big things from you, kid.”

“Thank you, sir.”

“Now get out there and scare that filly!”

“Hoorah!” chanted the wolf pack, running past their leader and immediately began to surround the mare, putting on the fake façade of snarling and wild carnivores.

The wolf leader picked the radio back up and changed the channel to his team’s channel. “Good form, boys. Ezekiel, more snarling, Martinez, look at what Bruno is doing with his teeth, do that as well… Good, good. Alight, Lee, I want you to do the lunge.”

“Roger that,” whispered Lee the Timberwolf as he pounced in Rarity’s direction, narrowly missing her. On purpose, of course. It was a common but effective tactic used to scare the ponies back the way they came.

“Good pounce, Lee—Hey! Be careful of that tree, you’re backing her up into it! Agh! No…” he sighed, watching his team accidentally back Rarity up into a large oak tree. “What is this? Amateur hour?!”

“Sir, awaiting orders,” Bruno said through his headpiece, staring into the mare’s eyes.

“Okay, okay…” the leader said to himself, observing the situation. “Alright, here’s what you’re going to do. We need to give her an opening so she can run away. Martinez, I need you to do a flying butterfly to her left. If she takes the bait, she’ll swat you away and then Bruno and Ezekiel can swoop in for the feign kill. Hopefully, she’ll see her opening and get out of there.”

“Sir, yes, sir!” the wolves said as they followed their leader’s orders. Martinez did the flying butterfly, an easily predictable flying lunge that was always aimed too high. Just as the leader predicted, Rarity instinctively swiped her hoof at the Timberwolf, and smacked him off course. With Martinez down, Bruno and Ezekiel both ran in with snarling and foamy teeth, causing Rarity to run in the opposite direction.

“Alright, now keep the chase up for about half a mile and we’ll call her gone.”

“Did you see that?” laughed Martinez. “This girl thinks we’re actually going to kill her!”

“You did good kid, but don’t get cocky,” Bruno said to him. “And keep up the—what the hell?!”

“Is that a dragon?!”

From the shadows of the trees and snow, Spike came running into the fray. He grabbed the stunned and horrified Martinez and threw him into a nearby tree.

“This is bad!”

“What do we do?!”

“Captain! What do we do?”

“Son of a—“ muttered the leader, switching the channels of his radio again. “Mother Den, this is Big Bad Wolf. We have a situation!”

“We hear you Big Bad Wolf. What’s your status?”

“We have a dragon here and he’s looking for a fight! Requesting permission to retaliate against the hostile!”

“… Permission granted, Big Bad Wolf,” the radio voice said. “But only against the dragon.”

“Okay…” said the leader, switching the channels once again. “Timberwolves! Attack!”

The Timberwolves did just that, jumping up against the dragon and lashing out with their claws. They tried to sink their teeth into his hide, but he kept swatting them away. He seemed determined to protect the mare at any cost.

Bruno managed to get around behind the dragon and jump on his back, where he attempted to bite at the dragon’s neck. But Spike stopped the bite with his arm and shoved him off. The dragon started to breathe fire, terrifying the Timberwolves as they tried to run away. However, Martinez wasn’t so lucky. He was caught in the full blast of the dragon’s inferno.

“Martinez!” Gasped the leader. “That’s it! Retreat! Every wolf retreat!”

Spike watched as the cowardly wolves started to flee, dragging their burnt comrade with them. He gave a bellowing roar of victory before collapsing in the snow, exhausted and weak from the large gash in his left arm.

“S-Spike?” Rarity wondered as she slowly walked up to the fallen dragon. “Spike? Wake up!”

*****

Somewhere far away from the dragon and the pony, the Timberwolves gently placed Martinez on a snow bank.

“Ezekiel, get a first aid kit, now!” ordered the leader, looking down at the injured wolf. “Stay with me, dang it! Don’t you dare close those eyes, Martinez!”

“Si… Sir…” strained the young wolf. “I… I’m so cold… I c-c-can’t feel my legs…”

“That’s because they haven’t regenerated yet,” whispered the leader. “Ezekiel! Where’s his legs? Why haven’t they re-attached themselves!?”

“His legs were burnt to a crisp from that dragon’s fire,” Ezekiel said. “He has no legs anymore and he’s lost a lot of tree sap!”

“Tell me something I don’t know!” He roared. “Can you fix him?”

“… I’m sorry…”

“No…nonononono!” the lead Timberwolf said, gritting his teeth in anger and frustration. “You’re going to be okay, Martinez. We’re going to get you new legs.”

“Captain… It’s okay…” whispered the dying wolf weakly. “It’s all part of the…of the job.”

“I…” the leader tried to say, but he couldn’t finish his sentence. “This world isn’t good enough for you, son.”

“Captain…”

“Yes, soldier?”

“P-p-permission to die…?”

“… Permission granted.”

Author's Note

Oh god, that ending was sadder than I thought... Quick! Watch this to counteract the feels!

Be sure to check out the new My Little Disney Group on FimFiction!

Heat in the Snow

The snow in the wind swirled like little tornadoes, curling and wrapping around the dormant trees and cold street poles of the frozen town. Everypony was inside their warm homes, cuddling next to one another by the fires and sipping hot chocolate under fuzzy blankets. They were allowed to forget about the snow and the frost for the night and embrace the comforts of a heated home.

However, there was one pony that didn’t get to experience this joy, and instead was forsaken to the frozen wrath of winter. Consort sat shivering outside the steps of the Carousel Boutique, waiting for a mare that would never come.

“W-w-where is she?” He shivered, wrapping his cloak around him tightly. “I can’t imagine that she’d make a trek home in this snow. She’s probably all curled up by the fire sipping tea…while I’m out here freezing what’s left of my a—aww, what’s the point…” He slumped down deeper into the snow. “Stupid Prince Blueblood.”

“You know, you don’t have to stay in the snow, right?”

Consort looked over to his shoulder. Trekking in the thickness of the snow, a heavily coated pony approached him. The pony’s face was covered in scarves, but the red-coated unicorn knew there was only one pony crazy enough to come looking for him in a blizzard.

“Feather Duster, what are you doing here?” He asked.

The mare pulled down on of the scarf. “Nice to see you too,” she smiled. “So would you please tell me why you’re sitting out here in the cold when you and I could be curled up next to the fire?”

“Because Blueblood wants me to wait here until that mare he’s trying to marry shows up. However, I quickly made the assumption that she probably isn’t crazy enough to walk through this snow… Unlike some ponies I know.”

“Well, when you didn’t show up with Blueblood I got worried,” Feather said, taking a seat next to the older pony. “I was afraid that he left you dead in some gutter. Glad that I was wrong.”

“Aww,” snickered the stallion. “You were worried.”

“Of course I was worried!” Huffed the mare. “You can’t spend all night in a blizzard! You’ll get sick, or freeze to death!”

“Just following orders,” sighed Consort. “If there’s even the slightest chance that that mare would come back tonight and I wasn’t here to see it, Blueblood would have my head on a platter.”

“If we don’t get you warmed up, it won’t matter because you’ll be a popsicle,” said Feather Duster. “Come on, I’m taking you home.”

“Sorry, but I’m not leaving this spot.”

“What?! Why not?”

“Well, for one,” Consort began. “I think that my hooves are frozen to the ground, and two, I was told not to leave this spot until she gets here.”

“And you’re just going to listen to him!? That’s crazy!”

“I suppose I am,” chuckled Consort. “But just a little.”

“You’re impossible, you know that?” frowned the mare. “Well…fine. If you’re going to be so stubborn then I guess I’ll have to sit here and freeze with you.”

“Feather…” Consort tried to say.

“Shut up,” smiled Feather Duster. “If you’re going to be stubborn, then I’m going to be stubborn with you.”

“Why?”

“Because… Because I love you,” she said.

Consort’s cheeks grew redder. “Really?”

“Of course, stupid,” sighed Feather Duster, rolling her eyes. “I haven’t told you that before?”

“I don’t think so…”

“I think that I did and you just forgot, you old geezer,” giggled Feather, playfully shoving the older stallion. “You really need to learn to pay attention better to your marefriend.”

“It just seems so weird…” said Consort. “I never expected someone like you to show up in my life. And it feels so wrong for us to be together… I’m old enough to be your father.”

“Could we not talk about that,” asked the maid. “You’re like a broken record with that. How many times do I have to tell you that I like you for you?”

“Until I believe it,” chuckled the advisor.

“Consort… How can I explain this to you…?”

Yes, I made a choice

That some think is rather strange,

But I wouldn’t take it back, even if I’m called deranged!

Who cares now?

If you think I regret my choice, Consort, well then…

You're a fool!

Think again!

This is love,

You’re all I’ll ever need to be happy,

Never dreamed

I could love a pony like you!

You should know…

Every day in my childhood

My mother would tell me so:

Love is where the heart is!

Love has no eyes to see,

My heart's here, it’s right here

Next to you.

I love you.

It’s the one thing I truly believe in

Try to find

An excuse that this shouldn’t be!

There’s no way,

That we shouldn’t be together,

Together in this wispy snow,

Love, will keep you toasty,

Like a heater between your thighs,

My love’s here, in the snow,

By my side.

What I'd give to run away

From the drama we’ve known lately

But I know that we can't,

Solve our problems by disappearing

This is love,

It will last everyday till forever?

And who cares?

If we’re frowned upon with judging eyes?

Even then,

They would all just be jealous,

Jealous of what we have.

They could build walls around me,

With locks without any keys,

I’d break free, and overcome,

“All of me?”

“My love’s here, next to you,”

“Love is me.”

“I… I…”

“Shut up,” smiled Feather Duster, snuggling into her special somepony as the winter wind blew into the night.

Even though it was below freezing out in the cold, the couple barely felt it in their warm embrace of each other’s love.That’s what it was. True love.

Author's Note

That feeling when you just cannot get a song to work, but then you do, but it's not in the way you thought so you have to write a WHOLE freaking chapter over it...

Sigh... anyways, just as well, this is the last of these guys we'll see for awhile. The next couple of chapters and onwards will be more focused on ~~Timberwolves~~ Spike and Rarity. So you have that to look forward to.

That Thing That Wasn't There Before

Spike’s eyes slowly started to open to the sound of the crackling fire. He felt weak, disoriented, and his body was cold and aching. He had no recollection of how he had gotten back to the castle; all he remembered was looking into his magic mirror and seeing Rarity in distress. After that, whatever goodness that still lived inside him had reawakened, and he had gone running to her rescue. It was all blurry after that, and the final thing he remembered was falling in the snow and passing out.

“Where am I?” He groaned as he tried to get up, but pain spiked through his body the second he tried to move. Paralyzed with agony, the large dragon succumbed back into his lounge chair.

“Master! You’re awake!” Pinkie Stick chimed, hopping up onto his arm rest. “It’s so good to see that you’re awake! We all thought that you were a goner after that nasty Timberwolf bite.”

“Pinkie…” the dragon groaned. “How did I get back in the castle? Last I remember I was in the forest and… Where’s Rarity?”

“I’m right here, Spike.”

It was difficult for the dragon to move his head, but he could sense that Rarity was standing behind him. “What are you still doing here? I thought you would of ran away after the way I treated you.”

“It was a tempting thought, I admit,” she said. “But after you were so brave and rescued me from those dreadful Timberwolves, I couldn’t just let you die. So I carried you all the way back to the castle so I could nurse your arm.”

“You, carry me?” Snorted the dragon. “Don’t make me laugh; it’s not in your nature to do heavy lifting… You don’t even take out your own garbage.”

The mare huffed. “And how would you know about what’s in my nature?” She stormed in front of him, carrying a warm bucket of soapy water in her teeth. “Now hold still while I clean your arm. There’s tree sap and wood in there and I don’t want you to get an infection.”

“And now you’re cleaning and playing doctor. You really are something else, Rarity.” The dragon frowned as he watched the unicorn pull a soaked wash cloth from the bucket. “You can drop the act, I know you hate dirt. Just give it to Pinkie Stick so you don’t throw up everywhere.”

“Why are you being so crude?!” Rarity shouted. “I’m just trying to help you!”

“I didn’t ask for your help!” the dragon roared back. “And I wouldn’t need your help if you didn’t run into the Everfree Forest in the middle of a snowstorm!”

“Well, if you didn’t scare me then I wouldn’t have run into the Everfree Forest in the middle of a snowstorm!”

“Well, if you didn’t go into the one room that I told you not to go to in the castle I wouldn’t have scared you and made you run into the Everfree forest in the middle of a snowstorm!”

“Well…” Rarity thought to herself. “You need to control your temper!”

“Temper?! I’ll show you temper!” He tried to get up, but his entire body screamed with pain. “Oh goddess, everything hurts!”

“Stop moving then,” Rarity said, carefully squeezing the excess water from her towel into the bucket. “Now, I’m going to apply the towel now… Just be aware that it’s going to sting a little, so brace yourself.

“I’m a dragon, I think that I can take a little water on my—AH JEEZ THAT STING!”

“I tried to warn you…” sighed Rarity, lightly dabbing the cloth on his wound. “You’re doing fine though, I don’t think that it’s as bad as I thought it was. Personally I was afraid that you were going to light me on fire.”

“Don’t tempt me…”

The dragon felt a small waxy tug on his tail. “Umm, Spike,” whispered Pinkie. “You should at least thank her for bringing you back from the forest.”

“Why should I thank her?” he whispered back. “It’s her fault that—“

“Humor her then.” She looked at the dragon with big, starry eyes. “You know that she’s thankful to you for saving her life.”

“I don’t see why I have to do it!”

“Please Spike…” she begged. “Think about the spell.”

With a disgruntled groan, the dragon swallowed his pride. “Thank you…for bring me back to the castle,” he said. It had been so long since he had had to thank somepony for something. Living the way he did with anger and resentment, Spike had almost forgotten what it was like to properly thank a pony for a good deed.

“You’re welcome,” smiled Rarity. She dropped the bloody rag into the bucket and started started to put it away. “I’ll be back soon with something to eat. That wonderful tankard has managed to scrape together a little midnight snack for you.”

“Great.”

“It is, isn’t it?” Rarity started to head out the door. “Oh and Spike. I would like to thank you as well, for saving my life that is. I’m not even going to ask why you were spying on me with that mirror, although we’re going to have a talk about privacy.”

“Why?”

“Because if I’m going to keep living here there’s going to be a few ground rules, of course!”

“Wait… You’re not going to try and run away again?” asked the dragon. “But I’m injured; I’m in no condition to enforce your captivity. Besides, isn’t that what you wanted? You could see your father and family again.”

“Oh, I still intend to escape,” she beamed. “But not in the middle of a blizzard. And I certainly will not leave you while you’re recovering.”

“That’s…very nice of you,” mumbled Spike. “Thanks…”

“Wow, twice in one day!” cheered Pinkie Pie. “That’s a new academy record!”

“Pinkie, be quiet.”

“Oh, now don’t be rude Spike,” said Rarity. “It wouldn’t kill you to be nicer to her. That’s another thing we need to work on, your manners need a fine tuning. Why, with all the things that I need to do here, I don’t think I’ll ever find time to leave.” She trotted out with a huff and headed out of the main room and towards the kitchen.

“What do you think she meant by that, Pinkie?”

“How should I know?” shrugged the candlestick. “But who cares! That was great Spike! You’re really starting to show some progress. You two will fall in love in no time flat.”

“Yeah… You know what? Maybe you’re right.” Spike smiled, sinking more comfortably into his chair. “Maybe she has changed… I know that I have.”

“And you can change again!”

“I will… For her sake, for all of our sakes I’ll try to make things right. Even if we don’t break the spell, at least I can say I didn’t just sit around in self-pity.”

“Well…”

“Don’t say it Pinkie.”

“Sorry boss,” the candlestick giggled, hopping off Spike’s armrest and heading towards the kitchen to go and help Rarity with the food.

“Maybe you have changed…” Spike said to himself. “Maybe there’s something there that wasn’t there before.”

*****

Back in Ponyville, the blizzard started to die, going from a raging inferno of ice and wind to the cold embers of a gentle snowfall. Night was now upon them, and although the moon and stars could not shine through the thick snow clouds, everypony knew that it was now the time for sleep and dreams.

But one stallion could not sleep, not after the day he had had. Deep within Downtown Ponyville, in the large black dumpster of a forgotten alleyway, Magnum peeked his head out through the crack of the opening between the hull and the lid. He scanned cautiously in both directions, making sure that the coast was clear before sinking back into his smelly hideout.

The smell however was no more than mere camouflage. This dumpster was actually one of his many safe houses that he had set up in the early nineties before he had gotten married. The inside was actually well kept, despite the walls being covered with newspapers cut outs, red light pictures of the princess, and printed out pages of chatter.

At the moment, the moustached stallion was tinkering with a potato, a cocktail umbrella, some electrical wires and a fork.

“Come on…” he muttered under his breath. “Work…”

With his tongue hanging out, he gently connected the two sets of wires with the cocktail umbrella. There was a small zap as he heard a tiny buzzing noise from the potato so he jabbed the pointy end of the small umbrella into the potato’s skin. He then wrapped the rest of the wires around the fork that he had already stuck in the potato.

There was a small flicker of sparks from the fork and the cocktail umbrella started to turn slowly.

“Yes!” He grinned. “Now all I need is a few parts from—“

“Ka-Kaw!

“Speak of the Sombra,” Magnum said, placing the potato device on the ground and standing up, letting his head raise the lid of the garbage can. He looked around the snowy alleyway. His contact was nowhere to be seen. She was always good at staying in the background and out of site, one of the reasons she was so effective in their line of work.

“Ka-Kaw!” The voice croaked again.

The stallion cleared his throat. “Hoo… hoo…” he called, doing his best mimic of an owl. “Hoo hoo!”

Suddenly, a small cardboard box started to move towards the dumpster.

“Well, it’s about time you got here, Lyra,” said Magnum, leaning out a bit more out of the garbage can. “Did you have any trouble? Were you followed?”

“No and no…” said the green unicorn lifting the box off of her. “You know I’d never compromise the mission.”

“I know… Just a habit of age. I’ve seen too many good ponies get captured by the government to see such a skilled agent like yourself share a similar fate.”

“I know that,” she smiled. “Thanks for worrying about me.”

“Keep the friendly banter for you marefriend,” said Magnum; he had no time for this. “Did you get my things?”

“Yeah,” nodded Lyra, reaching into her saddlebag and pulling out a small earpiece and a dial. “Also, your wife and Sweetie Belle are okay, although there’s some red pony and a maid sitting outside of Rarity’s shop. It’s really weird, they’re…singing.”

“A singing maid?” wondered the moustached pony. “Could it be…” He started to search the piles of papers that he had stacked around the dumpster, pulling out a small photo of a maid. “Was it this maid?”

“No… I don’t think so,” said Lyra. “Her coat was silver, this mare’s fur is more of a light charcoal. Who is this?”

“Quo Teng Zu,” said Magnum. “A.K.A. The Singing Maid of Death, the most dangerously deadly assassin in the eastern world.”

“I don’t think that’s her.”

“We can’t prove that yet, but it’ll have to go on tertiary priority. Primary goal is to find out if that dragon has moved or hurt my daughter.”

“Why not just charge in and rescue her?” asked the mint-coloured mare. “The townsponies would gladly help save your daughter.”

“Yeah, and get the government and the princesses involved! Then everything we’ve worked on is ruined!” Magnum frowned, placing the dial into the potato and placing the earpiece on. “I need to gather information and create a strategy, not just run in like some hot-blooded knight.”

“Whatever you say Magnum… Hey, did you hear anything about that special project I told you about?”

“You mean about that magical mirror that supposed to take you to an alternate universe where ponies are those human things and dragons are talking puppies?” asked the stallion, turning the dial, trying to find a signal. “A few of my associates think that it’s in the Crystal Empire, but I would say a much more secure place would be in underground Baltimare, you know, where they faked the Nightmare Moon rising.”

“Are you sure?” asked Lyra. “This is really important to me. I’ve been chasing that mirror for almost three years. I can’t let this go dark again.”

“Sorry kid, that’s all I know.”

“Thanks,” she groaned, obviously disappointed. “You’ll let me know if anything more concrete comes up, right?”

“Of course,” smiled Magnum. “Us crazies have to stick together. Now you better leave. We can’t be seen together.”

“You make it sound like we’re having an affair,” Lyra grinned cheekily. “Just try to be careful, you old stallion.”

“See you, and say hi to Bonbon for me.”

Lyra nodded and threw her box back on, shuffling around in the snow inconspicuously. Magnum rolled his eyes playfully at the mare’s antics before resuming his work on the potato thing, twisting and turning the knob of the dial, hearing a fray of static in his earpiece.

“This may take a while, but I have to keep trying. I will save my daughter.”

*****

The night’s snow finally started to pass with the warm embrace of the morning sun. Despite the thick trees of the Everfree, the sun shined through and to the castle in the forest. Its occupants had woken up rather early that day, reenergized from last night’s rather unfortunate events.

Twiclock opened the door to the garden, hobbling out onto the steps and into the snow. It was rather deep for a clock her stature; the snow was up to her waist. Pinkie Stick rode on a cautious Flutterbench. The bench took her time with the steps, making sure that she didn’t slip on one of the icy steps.

“Hurry up, Flutterbench!” screamed Pinkie excitedly. “I want to play in the snow!”

“I’m just trying to be careful, the steps are slippery,” responded the yellow bench. “I don’t want us to get hurt.”

“But you’re made of wood, and I’m made of metal! We’re not going to get hurt by a little slip.”

“My mother always said to be careful,” Flutterbench said. “Accidents happen when you least expect them to happen.”

Pinkie sighed. “Fine…”

“AJ, just let me go outside!” Rainbow screamed from the kitchen. “Everypony else is!”

“Would you jump off a cliff if everypony else did?” Tankardjack asked.

“I would if they did right now…” mumbled the cup.

“Rainbow!”

“Just let me go out and play,” she whined. “I just want to get out of this castle.”

“Fine, little darling,” sighed the beer mug. “Just let me find you a sweater.”

“I’m three inches tall!”

“That’s no reason for why you should catch your death out there.”

“There are no sweaters that will fit me! And I’m made of glass! I don’t get cold!”

“I won’t have any of that, young lady,” tsked Tankardjack. “Now put this on before you catch a cold.”

“Where did you even—Hey stop that!”

There was a small scuffle, with the sound of breaking glass and things slamming into one another, Rainbow screams were soon muffled and Tankardjack started to hop out of the kitchen and down to the door leading outside.

“Now come on, sugar cube,” she said. “You’re the one that wanted to go outside so badly.”

“I changed my mind!”

“Rainbow Cup, don’t make me drag you out here to have fun.”

There was a stifled groan as the blue tea cup grudgingly hopped outside the door. Rainbow’s friends had to bite their lips to keep from laughing when they saw that she was wearing a tiny orange turtleneck that covered most of her small body. Only her scowl of her eyes could be seen as she stared daggers at all of her friends.

“Laugh and I’ll destroy you,” the tea cup mumbled through the sweater.

Inevitably, Pinkie Stick burst out laughing “Aww! She looks adorable! Where did you get such a tiny sweater?”

“Found it off an old doll in one of the room. Don’t need my little darling here freezing to death.”

“I hate all of you…”

The rest of her friends just laughed at her expense as they all headed out into the snow to play. It had been so long since they have had the freedom to do so. Usually Spike forbade them from leaving the castle walls, but they noticed that he was acting rather optimistic, almost like his old self again.

When they all have gotten far enough away from the castle, Twiclock took center stage in the middle of their circle. “So anyways, there’s a reason why I’ve called you all here into the snow.”

“You mean we’re not going to play?”

“No Pinkie, there’s a much more serious matter we need to attend to, like breaking the spell. For the first time in a year, Spike seems to be actually… Well, happy. I think that there’s something there that wasn’t there before.”

“What’s there?” Rainbow asked.

“I do think that there’s something there that wasn’t there before,” nodded Flutterbench in agreement.

“What’s there?!” The tea cup asked again, her voice growing more frustrated and angry.

“So what y’all are reckoning is that we work with this hear thing that wasn’t there before?”

“Will somepony tell me what was there that wasn’t there before?!” Rainbow roared. "Stop pretending that I don't exist!"

“That’s exactly what I’m saying, Tankardjack,” said Twiclock. “We actually have a chance for Spike to be happy and to break the curse. But we’re running out of time, so I think that we need to give them a little push.”

“Push? You mean like make them fall in love with each other?” Flutterbench asked. “I don’t know… I don’t think that would work.”

“Well, we don’t have any other options Flutters. We need them to break the spell! I know that you don’t want to be stuck like this forever.”

“So what should we do?” Pinkie wondered.

“Don’t worry about that,” grinned the clock. “I have a plan.”

“Just think about it, girls!” smiled the candlestick. “We’re going to be ponies again!”

“Ponies again…” chimed Twiclock.

“Think what that means!”

“I’ll be baking again, throw some parties again,
With a cake and a pie in each hoof,
When I’m pony again, Only pony again,
With music to blow off the roof!
I’ll see all the Cakes again, play with Pound Cake again,
And of course play with Pumpkin Cake too!
No more lying around, my old self be re-found,
I’ll be pony a pony again!”

“When we’re Pony again, only ponies again,
When we’re teacups and hoof rests no more!"
“When we’re pony again, good and pony again!”
“I swear, I’ll burst out that door!
Spinning through the air, with my rainbowish hair!
I will break every tea cup in sight!
No tea parties for me, I just want to be free,
I just need to be pony again!”

“When we’re pony again, only pony again,
When the world would once more make sense,”
“I’ll read every day!”
“So like yesterday?”
“Hmm, I see your point…
Study magical things, like I’ve been doing…
Guess my life hasn’t changed all that much!
But still I digress, and I wish us success, so yes!
To be pony again!”

“So ready the honeymoon room, dust out the dirt in air,
We all sense, we can tell that she might break the spell any day now!
Hope that the dragon can swoon, treat her like diamonds so fair,
And if Twiclock’s plan works, then we’ll all get the perks of our freedom!
Rarity, you’re only hope to be free,”
“She can do it, you got to believe.”
“Sweep up the pears of sadness and tears and blow them away…"

“When we’re pony again! Only pony again!
When we’re all freed by that Rarity!
We’re a hoping again, that we’re coping again,
And won’t have to be like this anymore,
We’ll be playing again, and we’re praying again,
That the spell is broke A-S-A-P!
With a push and a shove they will both fall in love and we’ll be pony yes pony again!”

“So what are we going to do, Twiclock?” Tankardjack asked. “If y’all would be so kind as to inform us.”

“We’re going to set up the greatest, most romantic night ever for them! We’ll need good food, music, and somepony to clean the dancehall.”

“We have a dancehall?”

“We will once we clean all the garbage and other junk out of it.”

“That sounds like a lot of work…” moaned Rainbow Cup. “Can’t we just do it in the fireplace area?”

“No!” frowned the clock. “This has to be the greatest night ever if we’re ever going to make them fall in love with one another.”

“You mean like… Awarding winning great?”

“Exactly!”

“Then let’s do it!”

“When we’re pony again, We’ll be dancing again, we’ll be twirling again!
And we’ll all spin around with such glee!
“When we’re pony again, we’ll have fun once again!
Reunite with our family trees!
“We’ll be flying again, we’ll be trotting again,
Leaping bounds as far as we please!
Once she breaks the spell…!
We’ll be free from this hell…!
Can’t wait for that morn when we’re finally reborn and all become pony again!”

Growing Warmer

A few days passed in the castle as the snow started to settle in the forest. Spike’s arm had healed rather nicely thanks to the first aid of Rarity and his friends. The dragon had been getting better with his mood and attitude ever since that night with the Timberwolves, and with a little counselling from Rarity he was starting to even feel like his old self again. It was like the spark in his heart had been reignited and his darker side was slowing dying. Things were good for the drake.

He and Rarity had been spending a lot of time together, getting to know each other. This, of course, was completely one-sided. Spike fully remembered everything about his Rarity but, due to the spell, she couldn’t remember anything about her Spikey-wikey. That part was a little heart breaking for him. However, he had hope that she could relearn everything before midnight tonight, when his contract would expire and he would be stuck like this forever… as a monster.

At the moment, the two were sitting in the castle library. Rarity was nose deep in a rather large book while Spike was chatting with Twiclock, who practically lived in the library.

“Well…” Spike whispered to the clock while Rarity was distracted. “What do you think?”

“What do you mean, what do I think? Be more specific.”

“I mean what do you think about Rarity? We’ve gotten a lot better over the past few days but I’m not sure if she feels the same way I do… It’s last year all over again.”

“That’s not going to happen Spike, you know that she loves you… We just need to give it a little more effort,” said Twiclock. “And we need to do it soon. Luckily, the girls and I have started working on a plan for tonight. We just need a little more time to get ready.”

“Well, I hope you hurry. The spell’s going to be broken sometime tonight and this is our last chance.”

“Don’t worry about it; everything is going to be perfect!”

“I hope you’re right Twiclock… I really do. What should I do until then?”

“You should do something special for her; it would help if you could get the spark started before tonight. Maybe you could take her somewhere special. This is going to sound weird, especially coming from me, but maybe try going outside for a little bit. It’s far too beautiful today to waste indoors.”

“Maybe you’re right... Although she looks pretty deep in her book,” said Spike. “I’m not sure if it’d be a good idea to interrupt her.”

“Spike, don’t tell me you’re nervous,” grinned Twiclock, giving him a few nudges towards the reading mare. “Come on now, don’t be a Fluttershy.”

“Alright, alright,” mumbled the drake. “I’m going…just go get things ready for tonight… What do you even have planned for tonight anyways?”

“It’s a surprise, but just be sure to ask her for dinner, okay?”

“Alright, Twiclock. Now go hop off and get ready. I’ll see you later tonight for dinner and stuff. Now excuse me, I have to go and ask Rarity out.” The dragon got up from his spot and started to cross the room towards Rarity. There were a million and a half ideas and pick-up lines that he thought of using, he thought about playing it cool, smooth and charming, and he knew what he was going to say and how he was going to say it. Now all he had to do was… Well, actually say it.

Rarity noticed the approaching dragon and gave him a warm smile. “Hello dear, is there something that I can help you with?”

Spike’s tongue seamlessly turned into putty. So much for his two minutes of preparation. “Ha…hi… Hi Rarity.” Why was it so hard for him to talk? “So…hi.”

“Hi…” the unicorn asked curiously. “Is there something wrong? You sound like a cat’s got your tongue.”

Ye-yes…ha, ha… Funny, Rarity,” murmured Spike, trying to get his thoughts straight again. “So, anyways… I was wondering… Well, it’s a really nice day out and thought you’d like to go out in the courtyard for a walk… But if you say no that’s fine too! I don’t want to interrupt your book!”

“Why not at all, darling,” chimed Rarity, placing a bookmark in her novel and setting it on the table next to her. “I was looking for an excuse to stretch my legs and a walk sounds marvelous. Just give me a second to grab my scarf.” She trotted off to the coatrack and tenderly pulled her scarlet scarf down and whipped it around her neck, making sure that it was on snugly. “Are you ready to go, dear?”

Spike nodded his head as he squeaked out a “Yes,” and hurried to Rarity’s side. The two began to walk down the hallways and to the main doors that led to the castle courtyard. When they got outside they were blinded by the reflective snow, but their eyes quickly adjusted and they took their first steps into the cold, crisp air.

Rarity shivered a little as her hoof made contact with the snow. “A little colder than I thought,” she said to herself. “Maybe I should have gotten my boots as well.”

“I can go and get them for you, or send to have them delivered to you,” offered the drake. “If your hooves are a little cold, that is.”

“I think that I’ll manage,” she beamed, taking another step into the icy powder. “I think I’m getting used to it.”

“That’s good to know.”

Spike also took a step into the snow. He was a lot more tolerable of its coldness than the pony was, but that was to be expected. Feeling the snow between his feet was rather relaxing, and the fresh air was nice change from the stuffiness of the library.

“Spike look, robins!”

The dragon looked peculiarly at what Rarity was talking about. She had run up to one of the trees in the garden and was admiring a nest of red-breasted robins, as well as an assortment of other winter birds.

“Aren’t they just magnificent, Spikey?

Spike’s heart skipped a beat. “What did you call me?”

The mare’s face grew a little red as she tried to hide her blush behind her hair and behind the tree. “Oh… it’s just a little pet name I came up with. I do hope you don’t mind it, I wouldn’t want to call you something that you didn’t like.”

It couldn’t have made him happier. “No, that’s okay. In fact I kind of like the ring to it… Spikey Wikey,” he started to laugh. “Spikey Wikey, I like it.”

This made the mare giggle a little. “Then I’ll make it a habit to call you it more often.” She started to look at the many birds fluttering in the trees. The way they flew in the air made them look like they were dancing with all the colours of the wind… Whatever that meant. The flock seemed to make a beeline towards the dragon, and Spike soon found himself over encumbered by the playful pecks of the birds.

“Ah, hey! Stop!” he cried, swatting at the infernal creatures. “I don’t have any food!”

Rarity couldn’t help but laugh a little, even if it was at his expense. It was just too funny. When the birds started to flutter away and she saw that he was okay, they both shared in a laugh. Spike even extended one of his claws and allowed a few birds to rest on his hands and fingers, pecking at his scales.

It was so strange seeing Spike so…calm, Rarity thought to herself. She knew that he was getting better but this was a true test of his ability. It was almost angelic the way he reverted to such a charming, well-mannered gentledrake. It was magical…

“It is quite strange,
And yet I find,
That this dragon is both couth and well-refined!
And now I see, he’s so much more…
Perhaps there’s something that I didn’t see before.”

Spike looked out at Rarity who was playfully admiring him; he couldn’t help but blush in return. She was always so beautiful when her face got all red…

“She looks at me, I swear I saw,
Words I want to say keep dancing on my jaw,
And still I pray, there’s something more.
That she can still see the little drake I was before…”

“Yes… It’s a bit, alarming,
Who’d have ever thought I’d feel this way…
True…that he is quite charming,
And perhaps all of this was meant to be…”

Unknown to them, a few enchanted knick-knacks were watching them from within the castle…

“Well, who'd have thought?
Well, bless my soul,
Well, who'd have known?
Well, who indeed?
And who'd have guessed they'd come together on their own?”
“It's right peculiar.”
We'll wait and see,
A little more,
There may be something there that wasn't there before.”

“You know, perhaps there really is something there that wasn't there before,” smiled Twiclock.

“What’s there?” Rainbow Cup asked.

“There may be something there that wasn't there before,” repeated Tankardjack.

“STOP IGNORING ME!”

“Now hush now, little darling. It’s time to go to bed.”

“It’s three in the afternoon!”

The tankard mug picked up the fidgety cup in her mouth and started to head to the kitchen. The rest of their friends did little to nothing about it and focused on Spike and Rarity’s date.

*****

Meanwhile, back in Ponyville, the sun had been a gift from the goddesses as small traces of snow started to melt, a little strange so early in winter but no pony was complaining about the warmth that the sun emitted. A few stalls even dared to open up and test their luck for a market day, and all the fillies and little colts enjoyed their snow day.

However, in the smelly dumpster of a cold alleyway, Magnum was still hard at work making his potato radio pick up random chatter. He had spent the last three days in his base, hardly getting any sleep and barely eating the food that Lyra kept bringing him. He was a father on a mission and he wouldn’t let mortal limitations restrict him from finding a way to save his daughter.

He munched on a few crackers as he tried to hook up a pinwheel to an alternator in an attempt to boost his radio’s power. Rearranging things like wires and chips were nothing to him, mere child’s play, but he always regretted not sharpening his skills in advance machinery, as after the last three devices he made blew up in his face he was running out of materials to make his gadgets with.

“Come on…” he mumbled, making the exposed ends of wires touch each other lightly. “Steady… steady…”

Knock, knock, knock!

Magnum jumped at the sudden noise, losing his grip on the wires and knocking over his device. “Dang it,” he whispered, making sure that he kept quiet. Somepony was knocking on his trash bin, he knew that Lyra would make a signal so it couldn’t have been her. Was he compromised? Had the Princesses finally found him and were here to take him away to some underground torture chamber and beat him for trying to cut through the Everfree Forest? All he ever wanted in life was to save some time and expose the Timberwolves as the government operatives as they were. Was that really worth all this drama?

The answer was a large yes as the mustached stallion carefully reached into his stash of things and pulled out a small hoof cannon. If he was going down, he was going down kicking and screaming. Just like his honeymoon.

He kicked open the lid of the garbage can and aimed at the perpetrator. “Gut or nuts!” He screamed through his teeth. “Your choice!”

“Nice to see you too, Magnum,” mumbled the fiery-maned pony who had been knocking on Magnum’s lid. “What’s it been, like two years?”

The stallion lowered his gun as his heart started to beat at a normal rate again. “Spitfire, nice to see you again as well…” he sighed. “What are you doing here in town?”

The Wonderbolt rolled her eyes. “I was in town giving Lyra an update on that mirror thing she’s so interested in and I told her I’d check up on you. Got to say, I love what you’ve done with the place.”

“Sarcastic as ever…”

“Is that any way to treat your eyes on the inside?” Spitfire grinned. “Anyways, I’ve got some stuff for you, you old stallion.” She reached into her bag and pulled out a small bundle wrapped in a cloth. “Some lunch and wires, as well as some cookies from your wife. You know not to sound mean but I don’t see why Pearl stays with you, if I was her I’d have left you about a million crazy stunts ago.”

“I’m only crazy if I’m wrong,” said Magnum, taking the bundle from her. “And have I ever been wrong?”

“Countless times,” droned Spitfire. “But you’ve been right just as many times… Probably why I haven’t left you.”

“Then leave it at that… Thanks for the supplies. I was down to my last three wires. I swear I go through these things like my wife’s sugar cookies.”

“Yep, and if you keep indulging in them, you’ll lose both your hooves.”

“I’m always careful about wires and explosives!”

“I was talking about the sugar cookies,” said Spitfire. “Seriously, I’m getting fat just by looking at them.”

“Pearl always did know the fastest way to a stallion’s heart,” beamed Magnum. “How is my little Pearl, anyways?”

“She’s fine. She is getting a little worried and is wondering when you’re coming back home.”

“Thanks… It’s just so frustrating sometimes. Knowing that I have to leave her like this… but I need to save my daughter.”

“Yeah… That’s another thing I wanted to talk to you about…” Spitfire said nervously. “I don’t know how, but a research party is going to be heading into the Everfree tomorrow morning, but they’re bringing several guards with them…”

“Horse apples,” cursed Magnum. “Those Timberwolves must have told them about my presence and think I’m still in that castle. If they find Rarity they could use her as leverage to find me!” He hopped out of the garbage can. “There’s no time to make a plan. I have to find Rarity now!”

“Then I’m coming with you,” said Spitfire.

“No, I need you to stay behind and make sure that my family stays safe. If I die and don’t return, I give you permission to marry my wife.” With that, he made a beeline towards the Everfree forest and into the trees on a quest to save his daughter from the government and a dragon.

Spitfire just stood there with a dumfounded look on her face. “What the fu—?”

*****

Meanwhile, back at the castle in the forest…

Spike had started to lead Rarity back into the forest after spending a good chunk of the afternoon playing in the snow and feeding the winter birds, during which Spike had an idea of the perfect place to ask Rarity out for dinner.

“Spikey dear, I really don’t see the point in this blindfold,” muttered Rarity. “I’ve still yet to see every part of the castle and I would rather not get lost.”

“Don’t worry about it; it’s actually not that well hidden, it’s just another room hidden in the west wing and close to the kitchen. Plus you know that you can always just holler and somepony will come and help you get around. Besides, you don’t want to spoil the surprise.”

“I guess not,” said the blindfolded mare, trusting that the dragon would lead her to the room safely. “Are we almost here?”

“We’re here, Rarity,” said Spike. “Open your eyes.”

When the white mare did just that, she was blessed with a sight for sore eyes. Rarity thought she’d never ever see another fashion studio again in her life, yet here she was standing with rows of shiny new sewing machines, rolls of colourful and exotic looking fabrics, shelves of needles, scissors and ribbons, and mannequins of all shapes and sizes. It was enough to bring a joyful tear to her eye.

“Oh my… Spike, this is simply wonderful! I thought I’d never get to make another dress again in my entire life!” she turned to the dragon with a curious look. “How did you know?”

Spike, of course, had always known of the mare’s love for fashion, but couldn’t risk telling her that, so he made something up. “Oh, Pinkie Stick said something about you wanting to see our fashion studio, and I guess you’ve never actually got around to seeing it, so I spent a few hours cleaning everything up for you. I hope you like it.”

Rarity galloped over to the drake and wrapped her hooves around his chest. “I love it, Spike. Thank you so much.”

The dragon’s heart quickened in its beating as he felt the warm fur of the unicorn against his scaly flesh. There was so much that he wanted to tell her, that he loved her and that he wanted to spend the rest of his life with her, that he didn’t care if he even had to stay like this forever, as long as she could love him then he could be a dung beetle.

Now seemed like the best time to finally ask the question. “Rarity…”

“Yes Spike?” the mare asked, looking up at him while still in an embrace.

“Would you… Would you like to join me for dinner tonight?”

Rarity’s cheeks curled up into a smile. “I would love to, Spikey.”

The Beauty and her Spike

“This isn’t going to work, this isn’t going to work!” Spike panicked, pacing back and forth in his quarters in the west wing. “I’m going to mess it up, or say something stupid and ruin everything and we’re going to be stuck like this forever!”

His friends watched him scurry across the room. Spike had been in a fit ever since he asked Rarity to dinner that night and she gracefully accepted. He had hoped beyond hope that she would accept, and it wouldn’t be an exaggeration to say he was quite overjoyed with the fact that she said yes, but now the pressure was on, his bones shook and his blood felt ice cold in his veins as the seconds ticked away, the ever looming dinner growing closer with every audible tick on the clock.

“Oh goddess, oh goddess… I’m going to screw this up!” the dragon whined, dropping to his knees in mental agony, his arms spread from side to side. “She’s going to hate me! I’m going to burp or fart or both and then she’ll see me as the uncouth miscreant that I truly am!”

Slap!

A rubber glove whipped across Spike’s face. Twiclock used her magic to levitate a nearby glove to strike the dragon out of his ramblings. “Spike! Get a hold of yourself! You’re not going to screw this up, and you’re not going to say anything stupid. You are going to be fantastic and a gentledrake and she is going to love you so much that we’ll all become ponies again.”

“But what if I…”

“Stop it right there, mister,” hushed Twiclock. “Your negative attitude is not going to help you or any of us.”

“Yeah I know,” mumbled the drake. “You didn’t need to slap me in the face though. That was just uncalled for, Twi. I mean, I can’t help that I’m nervous. In case you haven’t realized, but everything is running on this night going absolutely perfect and off without a hitch and I can’t believe that you’re not panicking right now! You’re usually the one that’s going off the deep end at this point! How are you so calm?!”

Slap! Slap! Slap!

“Ouch! Stop slapping me!”

“Then stop yelling!”

“Both of you!” Flutterbench shrieked, cutting through the shouting match in a surprisingly loud yet still docile. “Please stop fighting… I-I hate it when my friends fight with each other.”

The dragon and the clock looked sheepishly down at their feet. “Sorry, Flutter, I’ve just been a little tightly wounded since we started this plan to get Spike and Rarity together… I’ve tried to be calm for Spike’s sake but that still doesn’t mean I’m not nervous.”

“Don’t worry about it, Twiclock,” smiled Pinkie Stick. “Everything is going to be perfect. Tankardjack’s got a great dinner planned, the dancehall is all polished and clean, and most of all we have great candlelight provided by moi.”

Spike rolled his eyes, but the antics did get him to smile. His friends had really gone all out to make this date work, and he knew that they were doing it for reasons beyond just to become ponies again. They were doing it so that he could be happy with the mare that he loved, the mare that he always loved and would likely always continue on loving. “Thanks, guys. Seriously, there’s no way I can repay you guys after all you’ve done for me, especially after all the abuse I put you through when I started to act like a monster. I am really sorry about that.”

“Don’t worry about it,” said Flutterbench. “We forgive you. What are friends for, anyways?”

“I know, but still, you guys didn’t deserve any of that. When we get back to normal, I’ never going to stop making it up to you guys.”

Twiclock giggled. “Don’t worry, Spike, I have a list three miles long for you do when we get back home on top of a million chores and errands to do as well. Of course, this can all wait until you and Rarity get back from your honeymoon.”

“Twi…” The dragon blushed. He was about to say something else when the door swung open, and a little teacup bounced in… how she was able to open the door would always remain a mystery. Rainbow Cup cleared her throat as she did her best to make motions out the door.

“Hey, Spike, your date’s ready,” she said. “Don’t screw up or I will come at you with the full extent of my wrath.”

“Rainbow, if I screw up, the wrath of a tea cup will be the least of my worries.”

“Just get out there and make her fall in love with you,” mumbled the tea cup. “If I have to be stuck like this forever, I’ll scream.”

“I’ll keep that in mind,” Spike said, walking past the tea cup and heading down the hallway before his eyes widened. “Oh wait! Almost forgot to ask you something, Twiclock. Do you think you could do me a favour? It’s really important.”

“Sure, what do you need?”

“Do you think you could teleport something that was in the Golden Oats Library over here to the castle? Would you be able to do something like that, or would that be too much?”

The clock thoughtfully scratched her chin. “If you knew exactly what you were looking for and where it was, I think I could manage something. What do you need?”

“Do… do you think you could teleport my bowtie? I kept it in a secret cubby under one of the loose floorboards by the history section,” said the dragon. “It would really mean a lot if I could have it for my first real date with Rarity. It’s something that I’ve always planned to wear on our first date.”

“I think I can do that,” smiled Twiclock. “You said the history section, right? Do you know the exact board?”

“Yeah,” nodded Spike. “It’s the cherry oak board that you spilt orange juice on a few years ago.”

“Oh yeah, I remember.”

Rainbow gave her a strange look. “How the heck do you remember something like that?”

“Photographic memory,” beamed the clock. “Now let me focus on this… if I screw up, I could possibly tear a rift in the space time continuum and destroy all life as we know it.”

“Right…” droned Rainbow Cup. “Because a bowtie is so worth destroying the universe.”

“Hush, Dashie,” said Pinkie Stick. “This is super-duper important! Go ahead and cast the spell, Twiclock.”

There was a flash of purple light as something began to manifest the air around them. Within but a moment, a bright red bowtie adorned with several sparkly gemstones appeared and floated over to Spike.

Twiclock smiled smugly. “See, nothing to worry about. Although you were a little off on your positioning, Spike. I don’t know why, but the bowtie was smooched up to one side of the secret cupboard and I almost missed it and started the apocalypse.” The clock plopped the bowtie right on Spike’s neck and adjusted it to perfection. “There we go. You look good, Spike.”

“You really think so?” Spike asked, spinning in little circles as he tried to get a good look at himself, but finding it hard to do as he almost knocked over all the furniture and things around the room in his spin. “I can’t seem to tell. You wouldn’t send me out there if I wasn’t handsome, right?”

“Well, you’re no Thunderlane…”

“Rainbow, shut it,” Twiclock snapped. “Now why don’t you go and help Tankardjack downstairs with the rest of dinner? I’m sure she’ll appreciate some assistance from her little helper.”

Rainbow Cup sighed heavily as she hopped out of the room, not even bothering to put up a fight with her self-proclaimed motherly figure. “I hate you all so much...” she said, muttering under her breath. “When I’m a pony again, I swear you’re all going to be in a world of pain!”

“You’ll have to speak up, Rainbow Cup,” said Pinkie Stick, laughing and bouncing alongside the cyan teacup. “Now hurry up, Spike! As Rarity would say, it’s not polite to keep a lady waiting.”

The dragon took a deep breath and shook it out, trying to take his anxiety and worries with them. This was it, the impending moment of truth between him and Rarity. Together they would have a pleasant dinner, proceed with the appropriate after dinner activities and, if all went as Twiclock had planned, he would become the very creature of Rarity’s affection, a dashing stallion prince, just as he knew she always wanted… what he knew she wanted. Well, tonight he would become the next best thing, a gentledrake for his beauty.

With edgy perspiration, he took his first few steps out of his room and down the hallway. The castle was really starting to look good, with all the dusting, mopping, and cleaning they’ve managed to do over the past few days the castle’s cleanliness was even beginning to become on par with the Princesses’ castle. He couldn’t wait to see how the dining area looked. As he entered the room the drake was greeted with quite a sight. And it wasn’t from the cleanliness of the grand ballroom.

“Oh… hello, Spike.”

Rarity stood there in front of him, looking absolutely stunning. He had wondered what she was doing in her newly found fashion studio and he was now left speechless by her new dress. It looked like it was made out of pure, untainted gold silk, glimmering with the beauty of sunset, but with the daring of the night. Rarity’s white cheeks were pink with blush and her hair was as beautiful as it ever was. The gold of her dress really made her shine like the perfect jewel with her amethyst shaded mane and snow white fur to complement it.

He wanted to say these thoughts that were running through his mind, to skip steps five through nine and just tell her that she was beautiful and that they should spend the rest of their lives together, or something cheesy like ‘flowers must be ashamed to bloom in your marvelousness’ to her. But as always, when he tried to say something to the beautiful pony he found his mouth filled with garbled words and illegible sentences.

“What do you think, darling?” Rarity asked, doing a few twirls in her gorgeous gown, creating a cascade of glittering gold that sparkled like the night’s sky. “Do you think it’s too much? I’m afraid I was a little rushed and just threw this together at the last minute.”

Spike was speechless, awe-struck by the bedazzling unicorn in front of him.

“Spike, are you okay?” the mare enquired, looking at him with a strange expression on her face. Spike felt he needed to say something quick or he’d look like a bigger idiot than he was already was.

“I want to take you to dinner now!” was the first thing that he managed to say, and immediately face-palmed himself mentally for saying something so stupid.

“Well, that sounds wonderful,” smiled Rarity. “After all, we do have a date tonight.”

Spike’s voice seemed to kick up a few octaves as he squeaked in agreement. “M-m-may I?” The dragon held out his claw, surprised when Rarity actually took it, balancing herself on her hind legs as they walked to their table hoof in claw.

Tankardjack and Pinkie Stick were just finishing the feast that they’ve spent all day preparing. They signaled the couple over to them and pushed one of the chairs up so Rarity could be seated. She thanked them and let go of Spike’s arm to take her seat, much to his displeasure.

“Good evening, madam,” said Pinkie, presenting a menu to Rarity. “Tonight’s special is everything! And you don’t even have to pay for it as well. In fact these menus are actually kind of redundant now that I think about it so…” She quickly snatched the menu back from Rarity’s hooves. “Just help yourself buffet style! Because buffets are the best ways to eat things after parties... oh my cupcakes! We should have a buffet party!”

“Pinkie, stay focused,” muttered Tankardjack, turning a nervous smile to Rarity. “Sorry about Pinkie. She’s just really excited, is all. Please, just say the word and we’ll get you whatever your heart desires.”

“And we’ll do it in ten seconds flat!” Pinkie shouted. “Or at least Rainbow Cup will. Speaking of, where is she?”

“I put her to bed, it was right past her bedtime.”

“It’s only eight o’clock,” Rarity said. “Isn’t that a little early, even for a little teacup like her?”

There was a ruckus from the kitchen as Rainbow’s voice snarled and echoed throughout the air. “I’m not little and I hate you all!”

“Go to sleep, little missy!” Tankardjack shouted, before hopping off the table and towards the kitchen. “Now don’t make me have to come on in there. It took me right near twenty minutes to get you tucked in, what with you being fussier than a varmint’.”

“No! I hate this cupboard! It’s cramp and smells like kitchen soap!”

“Well, it wouldn’t smell like soap if you would stay clean for more than five minutes and I didn’t have to run you four baths a day,” retorted the tankard cup.

“And I hate that sink to! It’s scratchy and it smells like the cupboard!” The teacup screamed. “Screw this! I’m getting out of here!”

“What? Hey, Rainbow Cup, be careful! Don’t jump from the shelf!”

There was some scuffling in the kitchen as there was the sound of dishes breaking and yelling. Tankardjack and Rainbow started arguing over something about cupboards and everypony else started to feel really awkward about the whole situation. Luckily, Rarity knew just what to do.

“Perhaps we can eat a bit later,” she said, getting up from the table. “We should probably give those two a little room.”

Spike nodded in agreement. “Y-yeah,” he said, getting up as well. “What do you want to do until then?”

“Oh, you’ll see,” Rarity smiled, giving a suggestive wink as she did so. “Come along, dear. I think I’m in the mood for a little… dancing.”

“D-d-did you say dancing?”

She nodded, taking Spike by the claw and pulling him towards the exit. She led him to the wide open dancehall, whereupon Rarity galloped ahead of the dragon and to the center. “My, it’s a lot bigger than I thought it would be.”

“I know, right?!” laughed the brass candlestick that followed them into the hall. “It’s amazing! And it can also be quite… romantic, if I do say so myself. Twiclock, hit the lights!”

The lights dimmed as music began to play. Spike’s heart jumped a little inside of his chest as he bowed to Rarity, who curtsied in return. He offered his claw, and she took it. As they began to dance, any onlookers would have said it to be a heartbreaking moment.

It was Beauty… and her Spike.

“Once upon a time…

Clear as all to see…

Rivals now turned friends, hearts begin to mend,

Growing like the trees…

Just a little spark…

To set the flames alight!

A heart that they both share, none can quite compare,

Beauty and her Spike...

Like they were before…

Oh so long ago…

Now they’re all grown up,

Falling into love,

Like the winter snow…

Unicorns and drakes,

None could ever think,

They were meant to be,

Love’s not what it seems,

Till their souls both sink…

Rising with the moon,

Lasting till twilight,

Tale as old as time,

Nothing is quite like,

Beauty and her Spike,

Dancing through the night,

Wrong, but oh so right,

Beauty and her Spike,

The two turned gracefully across the show’s floor, swaying gently with the smooth piano music. Spike gulped as he did his best not to step on Rarity’s delicate hooves, while at the same time trying to keep his claws from being too sweaty. The past five minutes seemed like a wonderful eternity. The way they danced seemed to capture the romantic, yet almost bittersweet nature of a relationship between a creature who was inherently greedy and the Element of Generosity.

It was a simple waltz but somehow Rarity fell into a dreamlike trance and like an awakening eye she finally saw it. The gem of her heart, her most longed after possession and the one thing that had been with her for only these past few weeks, yet she felt like she’d known him forever. Was this love?

Perhaps it was. It was that mysterious emotion that had always eluded her, always staying a step ahead of her heart. Now she wondered if she had finally caught up with it. Spike was no pony, he was far from it in fact, but he had shown her that even the most wild of souls could be tamed, and that there was beauty in the beast. A strange feeling coursed through her body and she could barely look into those deep green eyes, the ones that glimmered with care and friendship, loyalty... What would happen if they were to pursue this relationship? She knew there would be struggles they would have to confront eventually. The pain, the suffering, the forbidden love that these two would share as the rest of the world looked down at them.

Spike’s palms grew sweaty and his throat tightened. The music began to grow more passionate, and so did its dancers. He swore his heart would burst out of his chest at any given moment, leaving him a limp pile of regret. No matter how hard he tried, the black illusions of his past were gone; he could no longer hate her. How could he ever? She was too perfect for a monster like him. If he had to, he would allow her to marry anypony and he would spend the rest of his life mourning and crying over his lifelong love, if only to see that beautiful mare smile. It would be tragic, but when he stared down at those sapphire eyes of hers, his heart told him it would all be worth it.

He looked at her. Rarity's furry cheeks reddened as she was entrapped in Spike's hypnotic stare. She loved him; she wanted to scream on top of a mountain. 'I love you Spike!' ringed through her mind. 'I love you I love you I love you! Could you ever find it in your heart to forgive me?’

Spike noticed that Rarity was looking sad, he could tell from the way her face changed. Why was she sad? Was it something he did? Was she upset because of him?

"Are you okay, Rarity?" he asked.

"Spike... I..." She took a deep breath; confessing one's feelings could never have been so hard.

"Yes?"

“I… I miss my family.” She couldn’t do it. The words of truth just clumped in her throat and she coughed out the first alternatives that came to mind instead. It wasn’t false though, she did miss her family. She missed her mother’s cooking, her little sister, even her mad father with his crazy ideas and theories. “I’d give anything to see them again.”

The dragon looked around the room as he pondered. “Perhaps there’s a way to see them again. Wait here for one moment.” He dashed out of the room, leaving Rarity alone and confused in the hallway. But just as quickly as he left he came back carrying the enchanted mirror. “Here, look into the mirror and you can see anything that you desire.”

“The mirror…” Rarity asked. “Is this the same one you used to spy on me? Because we never talked about that. And all those statues and paintings of me…”

“Let’s just say you remind me of a pony I used to know,” Spike lied. “A beautiful, kind, and generous mare that I loved with all my heart, I just wished she had felt the same way as well.”

“Well, then she was a fool,” smiled the mare. “Perhaps she was me in another life, if we looked so similar.”

Spike chuckled a little. “Yeah… you could say that. But I do want to say that I’m sorry for spying on you like that. I never let myself see anything explicit, just bits and pieces.”

“You’re forgiven, Spike. Now how does this mirror work? I would like to see my father now.”

Suddenly the mirror flashed, the reflective silver of the mirror began to glow with a swirling aura before projecting an image of Rarity’s father. Magnum was wrapped up in several layers of clothing as he trekked through the thick snow of the Everfree forest.

“Rarity!” he called into the cold air.

“Father?” the unicorn said in surprise and worry. “What’s he doing in the snow?”

“Rarity!” Magnum called out again, giving a few coughs afterwards. He had been in the snow for far too long. He wasn’t a young stallion anymore, and his body couldn’t handle this kind of climate for much longer. The only thing driving him was the will to save his daughter from her capture. He was so tired, though. Maybe...maybe he would just take a little rest in the snow…

“Daddy, you fool,” whimpered Rarity. “He’s sick! He’s been out in the cold for too long! I need to go and help him and get him home!”

Anypony could see that Rarity was in distress and who could blame her? Her father was risking his life for her. As much as it pained him, Spike knew what he had to do, even if it would ruin his chance at happiness.

“Then I release you.”

“Pardon me?” Rarity asked, wiping a tear from her eye.

“You are no longer my prisoner… you must go and help your father.”

“But what about you?”

“If he sees me or comes here he’ll only freak out and get worse,” he said. “Only you can help him. Take him home and make him better. Live the life I know you deserve to live.”

“But Spike—“

He gently brushed a claw on her cheek, not only to calm her down but to get one last feel of her fur and to prolong their final moment. “Go, and take this mirror... I have no need for it anymore.”

Rarity didn’t know what to say, she couldn’t say anything in response to his kindness. She gave him one final hug, saying, “Thank you,” and scurrying out of the hall to change and grab her things, leaving Spike alone in the giant room to relish in the consequences of his actions.

He loved her. Perhaps too much. That dragon loved Rarity so much that he was willing to spend the rest of his life as an accursed monster so her father could live.

Pinkie Stick moved over to the sulking dragon. “You know… in the end you did the right thing. I’m sure the others will understand.”

“I know… but I think it would be easier for you to tell them. You have a way with words.”

“Okie dokie lokie…” sighed the candlestick, hopping towards the kitchen to tell her friends that they were going to be stuck as appliances for the rest of their likely unnaturally long lives.

There was the screeching of the gates opening outside, and Spike knew that she had left the castle. He prayed that she could get to her father in time. He hoped that he could at least rest peacefully knowing that he had at least given it his best shot, that he had tried his best to be with Rarity.

But perhaps it just wasn’t meant to be.

The Finale, Part 1

“HE DID WHAT?!”

Pinkie Stick gulped under the stress of the situation. It had been rather shocking for the rest of the castle’s knick knack to hear what Spike had done, that he had given up his and all of their freedoms so Rarity could go save her father. While it was the right thing to do, some of Pinkie’s friends weren’t taking it so well… one in particular.

“There is no way in Celestia’s sweet sunny skies that I’m staying a teacup forever!” Rainbow Cup sneered, hopping around in a fit of rage. “How could Spike do something so… so… pigheaded?! The next time I see him he better watch. Oh boy he better watch out. I’m going to hurl myself into his eyes and cut him when I shatter on his face.”

“Rainbow Dash!” Tankardjack frowned. “Now don’t talk like that, little darling. Now I know that this here is a bit hard to swallow and, well, I’m going to never see my family again… but still, Rarity’s father was in danger, and if I was Spike, I’d do the same thing a hundred times over.”

“Well I wouldn’t!” Rainbow barked. “This is so stupid! You all can’t really be serious about agreeing with Spike!”

The rest of her friends didn’t say anything, they just looked away. Rainbow realized that they were on Spike’s side on this matter, as hard as it must have been hard for some of them to swallow. It was for the best and at least Rarity would be happy.

“So that’s it?” She asked. “You’re just going to roll over and take this? I mean come on! We were so close to becoming ponies again, you can’t just give up when we’re so close!”

“There’s nothing we can do, Rainbow,” sighed Twiclock. “We just have to get used to being like this for the rest of our lives, I guess. It shouldn’t be too bad, we did fairly well for the past year like this. I’m sure the next sixty to eighty years should just fly by and we’ll eventually rot or rust and crumble into dust.”

“That doesn’t sound very nice…” moaned Fluttershy. “I don’t want to be a bench for the rest of my life… but I’d be okay with it if it meant no pony would have to die… I hope that Rarity’s father is okay.”

“I’m sure he’ll be fine,” said Tankardjack. “He’s a tough one. A little soup and bed rest and he’ll be right as rain.”

But Rainbow wasn’t going to take this lying down. The little teacup started hopping towards the door of the kitchen in a fit. “Well, you know what? To heck with all of you! Unlike someponies, I’m going to actually do something about this. There’s still time to try and convince Rarity to be with Spike. Pinkie said it herself, she looked like she was falling in love with him. We just need her to say it to the big lug and were all cool again. Easy, right?”

“Now where do you think you’re going, little lady?” Tankardjack barked at the teacup. “It is far past your bedtime and I don’t need to give you another bath.”

Rainbow was shaking. She had put up with all this nonsense for over a year, the curfews, the baths, being treated like a child by her friends. She had no idea why and she had had it. The little cup spun around and furiously bounced up to the large metal tankard. Rainbow was going to get to the bottom of this now. “Okay, you know what? What is your problem, Applejack? What’s all of you guys problem? All year you’ve been treating me like I was a newborn foal and I want to know why! Did Ding-a-whatever cast a crazy spell on you as well? Or did you all just agree that it’d be fun to torture the teacup?”

Tankardjack seemed unfazed by Rainbow’s rant, barely even noticing her heavy animal panting. The tankard glass looked around the to the rest of her friends as they all seemed to have a bit of a telepathic conversation with one another before they all nodded, the focus going back onto Tankardjack and Rainbow Cup.

With a sigh, Tankardjack began to speak for all of them. “I guess there’s no point in hiding it from you anymore, Rainbow. Truth be told, I wasn’t for the plan in the beginning but Twi was able to convince me to go along with it. I tell ya it was almost painful to keep this from you.”

“What do you mean? Keep what from me? I’m confused, what’s going on?”

“The babying, Rainbow Cup,” said the tankard. “It was all a plan to keep you busy and occupied so y’all wouldn’t go and do something rash. Do y’all remember what you tried to do when you first were turned into a china cup?”

“Yeah, I tried to go after Ding-a-ling and I—“

“And you tripped and nicked your head on the stone floor, we all remember.” Tankardjack motioned to the small chip on the rim of Rainbow’s head. “You see, you’re fragile RD, you’re not made of wood or metal like the rest of us. One bad tumble and you’re bits in a dust pan. So Twilight started to come up with a plan to keep you safe. She wanted me to keep you more or less contained so you wouldn’t get hurt. So I set up a curfew and a bedtime, I give you several baths to eat up the daylight and never let you go outside unless you wore enough sweaters and scarves to soften any stumble or fall. We did this all to protect you, Rainbow.”

“I… wait, what?” Rainbow asked, jumbled and confused by what her friend was saying. Her whole world was now shattered. The reality that she thought she knew was no more than a ruse, a false delusion that her friends had set up. She felt betrayed that they would do something like this without telling her. On the other hoof, knowing the truth would have just caused her to rebel harder. It had been a distraction to keep her busy while they waited out their days as teacups and other knick knacks, but that didn’t make help make the feeling of betrayal any less painful. “So you all just lied to me? How could you do that to me?”

“We we’re just trying to protect y’all.”

“So what!? Not like it’ll matter in a few hours,” Rainbow said, hopping to the door. “I’d rather risk my life to become a pony again then just roll over and take it. So you can sulk in your pity, but I’m going to convince Rarity to stay and break the spell.”

Her friends wanted to stop her, but deep inside they knew that there was nothing that they could do. If there was any sort of hope that they had, it all resided on that blue tea cup’s shoulder.

She had to act fast, although that was a task she used to be good at. Even the smallest of hallways were like track fields in the miniscule form. With no other means of transportation than hopping it took several minutes to get down even the first hallway. It was nothing short of pure luck that she was able to catch Rarity just as she was heading down the stairs.

“Oh thank goodness, hey Rarity!” Rainbow called out to the unicorn rushing by. “We need to talk! You’re making a huge mistake!”

But Rarity continued to rush down the hallways and down the stairs, paying no attention to the screaming teacup. Her mind was too focused on gathering her things and getting to her father. Thankfully, it was also too distracted to notice that she left her saddlebag on the floor and out of sight, giving Rainbow Cup the perfect opportunity to slip in and stow away in her diamond blue sack.

“There, I think that’s everything… oops! Almost forgot my saddlebag,” Rarity said, magically strapping her saddlebag on. With everything accounted for, she pushed passed the main doors of the castle and galloped valiantly into the snowy forest of the Everfree. “Hold on, father, I will save you!”

Rarity ran, passed the thorny bushes, over the dead logs, and under dormant tree branches. She hopped frozen puddles, plowed through snow banks and even trekked in the terribly fresh sludge of slushy ice and mud, ruining her hooves. The ivory unicorn checked the magical mirror constantly for directions, it’s silver reflection acting as a map to her father’s location in the maze of trees that the forest revealed to be. She lost track of time, but eventually she found her father, barely alive and shivering, a fine sheet of snow concealing him. The old stallion’s beady eyes glimpsed in his daughter’s direction before finally conceding to the elements and collapsing on the white ground.

“F-father!” Rarity gasped, rushing to her fallen father’s side. “It’s okay now, I’ve got you, you’re going to be okay. I’m going to get you back home and better.”

“Rarity…” Whispered Magnum weakly, barely able to stand on his own four hooves. “Am… am I a bad father?”

“What? Of course not, you’re the best daddy any filly could hope to have. What would make you think such a thing?”

“Because… I didn’t save us the ten minutes,” he said. “I’m a failure of a father, I’m worse than garbage. I belong in the trash.”

“No, you don’t! You’re a great dad that just needs to maybe stop blaming the princess and the government for all your problems.”

Magnum snickered a little, but was getting drowsier by the second. “Like that’ll ever change, Rare-rare… I’m too set in my ways, dear.”

“Yes, I know,” whimpered Rarity as her father’s weight grew heavier against her. “Now save your energy, I’ll get you back to the boutique.”

From then on silence reigned as the two travelled in the snow, and eventually back to the edge of Ponyville.

It was a little strange, being back in town after all this time. Rarity felt a little alienated from her old life and found the streets of the little village a strange and foreign land. Also, the strange and rather large clump of snow that had built up on her doorstep was new; she thought the neighbours would have at least swept up a little bit. But she had no time for that, she would clean the snow out later, after her father had recovered.

However, when Rarity and Magnum entered the house and the lock clicked, the pile of snow began to shiver, and the weeks of snow fell off the protective shield that Consort had cast to keep him and Feather Duster from freezing. The two had allowed the snow to surround them, cutting them off from the rest of the world and making their own little sanctuary in the snow. It had been a rather romantic time, but alas they had a job to do, and it was now time to call Prince Blueblood.

“Does it really have to end, Consort?” Feather asked, still cuddled up in her love’s hooves. “We could always not tell the dumb-dumb. He’d probably believe any story we’d pitch at him. I mean he’ll probably just go and strut off to the next floozy anyways.”

“And you’re probably right, but I’m sworn by my duty to do what he beckons, even if it’s stupid and ridiculous,” sighed the stallion. “Personally I’m looking forward to finally getting this all done and over with it.”

Feather Duster groaned, “I guess so, but I did enjoy our time alone,” she smiled. “Even if it was short lived.”

“We were there for over a week, Feather,” Consort chuckled, rolling his eyes. “C’mon, let’s get back to the train cart and to his royal pain, it’s getting cold.”

“That’s such an old pony thing to say,” teased Feather Duster, clinging to his side as they walked to the snow. “So what’s Blueblood plan for that Rarity girl anyways?”

“Not very good,” mumbled Consort. “He has a rather dastardly plan in store for them, and even though it means nothing at this point I would like to vouch one more time that I do not approve of this idea. I don’t like it, not one bit.”

“Save it for the choir, loverboy,” sighed the maid pony. “I’ll never understand how or why you’ll stand idly by while Prince Stupid does something… well, stupid.”

“When Blueblood has his mind set on something and he actually cares enough to remember it, he’s going to do it regardless of what anypony thinks. I can’t stop him, so I stay by his side to at least do damage control. You know, make sure he doesn’t make too much of a donkey’s rear end of himself.”

“Understandable, I guess…” said Feather Duster, reluctantly agreeing with the red stallion. “I just hope no one gets hurt.”

“Eh, what’s the worst that can happen?” Consort asked, as the two slowly headed towards the train station, making steady and cautious steps to prolong the inevitable.

While they walked in the snow, Rarity got busy taking care of her father. She got him out of his snow soaked cloak and threw blanket after blanket on top of him, doing her best to warm her father up. She rushed into the kitchen and started working on some hot soup and a nice cup of tea before once again bolting upstairs into the bathroom to fetch the medical kit and flu medicine. Rarity wanted to make sure that her father would get better from his cold as soon as possible so she was in full nurse mode.

“Now I need you to drink this daddy,” she said, lifting a bottle of pink liquid to her father’s lips. “It’ll help with the fever.”

“Thanks…” groaned Magnum, sipping the medicine. “My, my… this taste like your mother’s cooking.”

“Father, I’m sure it’s not that bad.”

“Bad? No, it’s wonderful!” Chuckled her father. “It taste almost like your mother’s double fudge and mayo casseroles, you know, like she makes every year at Hearthwarming? And how she layers the potato chips and peanut butter cookies on top? It’s to die for.”

“Yeah, no kidding,” muttered Rarity. “I don’t know why mother insists on putting cookies on everything.”

“It’s your mother’s pride and joy, dear. It’s what reeled me in.”

“I’m just going to assume that you’re delirious from your flu,” Rarity said. “Now please stop talking for a few minutes and rest, your soup and tea will be done in a few minutes.”

“I will, I will. But first I need to know something. How did you manage to escape from that castle and that terrible dragon? Did you use the skills I taught you when you were five? I bet you did, and your mother thought I was crazy for teaching a filly eighteen ways to kill a stallion.”

“No,” droned the white mare. “And I still get nightmares about what you did to that squirrel. But anyways, I didn’t have to do anything like that to escape from there. In fact, I didn’t have to escape at all; he just let me go free… You know, he’s actually not that bad of a drake once you get to know him.”

“Yeah… I’m sure.”

“I’m serious, father,” frowned the mare. “At first I thought he was rather brutish, but he did have enough kindness to let you free, and he even saved me from a pack of Timberwolves—”

“Wait, he did what?!” Her father gasped. “From an actual pack of highly trained tactical Timberwolves?”

His daughter nodded.

“Really… Well, I guess maybe he can’t be that bad.” He conceded.

“Spike’s actually quite charming, daddy,” the daughter blushed. “He’s nice, and brave, and I guess you could say…” She bit her tongue at the last moment. The words were tumbling at the tip of her tongue but they were still too scared to leap off. “… I really, really, like him.”

Magnum looked at his estranged daughter, it was the look she had when she was keeping something bottled up and refused to deal with her true feelings. However, his past history on this subject had proven to be less than fruitful. This was something she would have to talk with her mother about. “So how’s that soup coming, dear?”

They would never know how the soup would be doing, as there was a loud knocking coming front door.

“I wonder who that could be?” Rarity wondered, leaving her father’s side to answer it. What she saw on the other side was the last pony she’d ever want to see right now… Or ever.

“Hello what’s-your-name,” Prince Blueblood grinned devilishly. “Did you have a nice little… whatever it was that was keeping you from me?”

“Oh goddess no,” groaned Rarity. “Not— look, I don’t know why you’re here but I don’t have time to deal with you right now, right now I have to take care of my sick father.”

“Oh, well then, that’s a wonderful coincidence,” chuckled the young prince. “That’s exactly the same reason why I’m here.”

“What do you mean?”

Blueblood took a few steps aside, revealing the large mob of ponies that have gathered at front of her boutique. It looked like everypony in Ponyville had shown up for this unpleasant occasion. Rarity wondered why they were all there, and then she saw the large black carriage, with barred windows, doubled latch locked doors, and a faded golden logo saying ‘Ponyville’s Mental Institution for Loony Ponies’ on it.

“Oh, no…”

“We’re here to take your daddy to the crazy house,” grinned Prince Blueblood. “He came into town spouting nonsense about dragons and timberwolves and other maddening things. I know, it’s crazy right? Personally I think this is a long overdue imprisonment if I do say so myself, don’t you agree Ding-a-ling?”

The purple face warden of the mental house grinned his toothy, yellow grin. “You could say something like that, son. Although it may just be the alcohol talking.”

“Oh, bother,” yawned Consort, leaning into Feather’s ear. “We’re dealing with a drunkard on top of everything else.”

“Where’s your father?” Ding-a-ling asked. “I have a padded cell with his name on it.”

“What are you ponies talking about?!” Rarity demanded. “My father’s a bit odd I’ll admit but he’s not crazy! My grandmother had him tested.”

“And I’m sure he’s not nutty,” laughed Blueblood. “We’re all supposed to believe that he’s telling the truth about all these crazy things he says. That wolves work for the crown, that there are dragons in castles, that my aunts are actually the head of some sort of secret conspiracy? Can you say that your father has never assumed anything about that?”

“Well, no, but—“

“You see here, ponies!?” The prince announced to the crowd. “Even the mad colt’s own daughter can’t admit her father is sane! The only humane thing to do is to throw him in the pillow room and throw away the key!”

Rarity tried to say something to oppose the prince, but was over spoken by the loud uproar of the crowd. Somehow they were getting sucked into the delusion that was Prince Blueblood’s theory and were even chanting for her father’s imprisonment. She had to do something to save him. “Please, er… my prince,” she gagged, trying her best to scarffle the bile crawling up her throat as she attempted to woo the stallion. “I’m sure that a noble of your magnitude could clearly see that my father, while a little bit different, isn’t deserving of the title ‘mentally insane’. Isn’t there anyway I could convince you to tell them otherwise?”

Prince Blueblood’s highly thought out and educated plan was working, he had what’s-her-name right where he wanted her. Now she was helpless to his next question. “I’m sure that I could convince Ding-a-ling differently, I am a prince after all. A rich, handsome, incredibly good looking prince, as some have said.”

“Oh yes, I can see it now,” she droned. “Now if you could just go and tell that scary looking stallion—“

“Of course, you’d have to do something for me,” he chuckled.

“Like what?”

Blueblood pinned her against the wall of the boutique, entrapping her in between his forelegs. “You can say ‘I do’ and be my wife and queen.”

“What?!”

“I’m sorry, did I stutter?” Barked the prince. “Those you are your options, we can either get married or your father can eat cereal in a straitjacket for the rest of his life. So what’s it going to be, girly?”

“I’ll never marry you!” The mare scowled, acting more on instinct than anything else. She only realized what she said the moment she said it. Of course she had no desire to marry such a repulsive stallion, but she usually would be able to flirt a little, maybe weasel out a technicality. Now she had blown it and ponies were already storming her home to abduct her father.

Magnum was dragged out, twisting and squirming, trying to escape the bindings Macintosh and Time Turner had strapped him in, but it was hopeless. There was only one thing left to do; she had no other option. She just hoped that Spike would be able to forgive her.

“My father is telling the truth!” She cried, reaching for the mirror in her saddlebag. “And I can prove it! Look into the mirror and see the dragon of the Everfree Forest!” The mirror flashed and glowed as an image of the sulking dragon was projected onto the silver for all to see. Everypony gasped at Spike’s frightful appearance. Even Consort and Feather Duster’s eyes widened at this new piece of evidence.

“He was telling the truth…” The advisor gasped.

Prince Blueblood was almost speechless. “There’s an actual dragon in the Everfree?!”

“Yes, but he’s friendly, I promise you,” Rarity said. “He wouldn’t hurt a fly, much less any of you.”

“THERE’S A DRAGON IN THE EVERFREE?!” Shrieked the young prince. “There’s a dragon in the Everfree!” But then he realized something. “There’s a dragon in the Everfree… a vicious, fire breathing, pony eating dragon…” He began to smile wickedly, turning to Rarity. “What’s-her-name, your services will no longer be required. I have a much better plan to become king now!”

“What?”

“Ponies of Ponyville! We’re in the midst of a crisis. A terrible flesh eating dragon is in your forest, just a few steps from your doorways! Your homes aren’t safe, and your families are in danger as long as the beast is allowed to live!”

“Which is why…” Consort stepped in. “We’re going to contact the princesses and deal with this matter civilly and see if we can relocate this dragon to a less populated area.”

“We don’t have time for that, you fool!” Blueblood roared. “This is the time for action, these ponies don’t need politics, they need a leader! They need me! Ponies of Ponyville, if you want to stop living in fear of this dragon then we need to deal with it now! I say we slay this dragon and mount his head over my throne!”

The crowd shouted in agreement, getting rallied by the prince’s speech. It looked like not even Consort could stop the prince. He was out for blood, a power high to destroy this dragon and become king in the process.

“But he isn’t a bad dragon!” Rarity pleaded. “He would cooperate if you just talked to him!”

“Clearly this mare is under the dragon’s spell,” mumbled the prince. “Lock her and her father in the cellar… as for the rest of you, I need every big strong and strappy stallion to help me mount an assault on this dragon’s lair! We’re going to kill this drake!”

“Nooo!”

He’s a terrifying villain,

Just a demon born of fright,

Here to sacrifice our fillies to his undying appetite

It’ll be havoc for our village if we keep this monster free!

Then it’s time to take some action colts

It’s time to follow me!

Through the dark, through the grime through the shadows of the Everfree,

It’s petrifying but one exciting ride…

Make a trip and a wish, then you’re standing at a castle,

And there’s a terrifying monster deep inside!

It’s a dragon as tall as a mountain!

Fire breath, breathing death I was told,

Make him scream make him cry, we won’t rest till he’s died

Till he’s dead, yes he’s dead! Kill the drake!

“Grab your sword, form a horde,”

And get ready for the breaking point

We’re counting on Blueblood to lead the way!

Say a prayer but beware, that there’s something in that forest,

A monster that we don’t see every day!

He’s a dragon that’s fearsome and wild,

We won’t rest, try our best to prevail!

Tally forth, guard our homes

We’re all itching to go!

With an order here we go~!

"We'll lay siege to his castle and chop up his head!"

Rarity and her father were thrown into the boutique’s cellar, as Blueblood led the mob into the Everfree forest and towards Spike’s castle.

Father and daughter tried to force the door open, but it was locked from the other side. They were trapped.

“This is all my fault…” moped Rarity. “I shouldn’t have revealed his location.”

“Don’t feel bad honey,” her father said. “You were just trying to protect me. And don’t worry, I’ll find a way to get us out of here. I can make an explosive with almost any combination of three items. What do we have to work with?”

“Some fabrics, a few old ponyquins, and maybe some dull pair of scissors.”

“Dang it,” frowned Magnum. “Literally the three things I can’t make an explosive out of.”

“So if you were given a banana, a salt shaker and a bag of marbles you could make an explosion?”

“Sweetie, I want to blow the hinges off the door, not the house.”

Rarity didn’t bother responding to her father’s worrying statement, but instead began searching her saddlebag, maybe she could find something useful in there, a spare key or a hammer… or a little stowaway.

“Rainbow Cup?”

“Oh thank the goddess you opened the bag!” The little teacup gasped as Rarity picked her up. “It was hot in there and I think I got glitter in my nose.”

“What are you doing here?”

“I came to convince you to come back!” Rainbow barked. “We need you, Rarity! And no offense but I heard what you did and I think you owe us.”

“I know I’m awful… I just wanted to save my father.”

“Whatever, how do we get out?” Rainbow asked. As she started to think she noticed that there was a little window leading to outside. The window was too small for even a filly to squeeze through, but a teacup… “Open that window.”

“Rainbow Cup, I don’t think we can fit through there,” Rarity said.

“I know, but I can. I can find maybe a key or something to open the door. It’s worth a shot.”

“I guess so,” the white mare thought, as she hoisted the cup up the window and through it. “See what you can do, but hurry, we don’t have a lot of time.”

When Rainbow was outside, she started looking for something to work with. Maybe there was a hidden key in the garden, an axe to chop the door open with… then it occurred to her that she wouldn’t able to use any of those things even if she somehow manage to find them. So much for that plan and saving Spike and the rest of her friends, they would need a miracle now.

Just then there was the strange sound of a gears turning and whistles tooting as something began approaching from the distance. A strange device, large and red with axes and saw blades swinging to an enigmatic tune, came rumbling down the road, with two familiar yellow hatted sales ponies riding it.

“I really think we got it this time, brother of mine,” Flim said, grinning at his moustached brother. “Don’t you think?”

“I do,” smiled Flam as they continued to drive into the town. “I’m so glad that we got out of the cider game and got into the wood cutting racket.” The moustached pony patted their machine a little. “I think the Plies lots of Timber device will be a huge success!”

“Indeed, Flam. This P.L.O.T. Device is our greatest idea yet! No longer will ponies have to suffer through the rigorous chore of cutting wood or piling it up! We’re going to make millions off of this idea!”

“And nothing can stop us!” The two laughed.

Rainbow was baffled by this golden opportunity and knew that she had to capitalize on it. With all her might she hopped over to the road, and jumped onto the road ahead of the automotive cart. They didn’t see the cup right away, but when she expertly timed a jump just as it would have run over her.

“Listen losers, I need to borrow this ride.”

The FlimFlam Brothers stared blatantly at the talking teacup before screaming in terror. “Holy rotten crab apples!”

“It’s a talking teacup!”

“BAIL, BROTHER, BAIL!”

The two brothers jumped from the P.L.O.T. Device and landed safely in the bushes, leaving Rainbow Cup in control of the strange machine, and steering it right into the Carousel Boutique, crashing it into the cellar doors and nearly destroying half the building in the process. Luckily, Rarity and her father were able to get out of the way in time. When the smoke and dust cleared Rainbow Cup was hanging from a loose string. And she was grinning like she hadn’t in over a year.

“Somepony better get a mop, because I just awesomed everywhere!”

Author's Note

Edited by Pia-chan!

Next part will probably be the last, and I decided to break up The Mob Song into two parts in case you were confused.

Hope you all like and enjoy!

The Finale- Part 2

The rain began to pour from the sky as Spike stared into the black forest. His heart still ached with guilt from his decision to let Rarity; the only pony he would ever love, free to save her father. More than just that, his friends would forever hate him for his choice no matter how noble his intention. The dragon figured it would just be better if he stayed in his room for the rest of his life, severing contact with the outside world and the ones he cared about. He had accepted his fate that he would live the rest of his days as this monster, forever alone in his shredded room.

And as he thought these things to himself, even the castle’s knick knacks and enchanted items felt the veil of depression shroud them as they laid lazily in the main hall, sighing and staring at the vast ceiling. What were they to do? Spike had let Rarity leave so there wasn’t much point anymore in doing housework or even work in general. It was sad that last year would repeat itself until they rust and rot away but at the same time, they really couldn’t be that mad at Spike. He was just doing what he thought was right, and in the end they would have done the same thing.

“This sucks,” sighed Pinkie Stick as she hung upside down off the table’s edge. “There’s nothing to do again. If there was anything I miss the most about Rarity is that she at least gave us something to do.”

Twiclock shrugged in agreement. “Now Spike just wants to go all cave drake on us like before.”

“At least he’s not mean anymore…”

“But for how long, Flutterbench?” The clock asked. “Remember the first time? It was only three weeks before he started lashing out and jumping on the walls and…ugh, defecating everywhere. I refuse to go back to cleaning dragon droppings! I did it once when he was an infant and I won’t do it again!”

“I don’t think we have to worry about that this time,” said Tankardjack. “He doesn’t know it but he finally got some closure, even if it’s not the type he wanted.”

“What do you mean?”

“Well, the big guy finally got to go on his date with Rarity. It’s all he really ever wanted. I mean sure he wanted her to love him back and all, and we all know she does, but he got his chance to finally feel what it was like to dine with her, to dance with her, to really and I mean really feel what it’s like to be on a date with her. It may not have ended like Spike had hoped, but I think we all know she was just one thought away from kissing him. But y’all that’s just my opinion.”

“Well I…” Twiclock began to say, trying to think of something to say back to the metal tankard. “I guess you’re right…so what are we all supposed to do now?”

“Anypony want to play Go Fish for the next twenty or so years?”

*****

“Kill the drake! Kill the drake! Kill the drake!” The mob of ponies shouted. Blueblood and company all stood at the very edge of the Everfree Forest, the eeriness and spookiness of the woods halting their progress. A few of the stallions in the horde gulped a little at the imposing forest, shivering a little as they started to have second thoughts. One pony from the crowd shouted, “So…does anypony actually know where there’s a castle in the Everfree?”

“Yeah, that sounds like something we should have noticed…” another pony said.

“I’ve never even been in the Everfree.”

“Will all of you shut up for a minute?!” Blueblood demanded. “I have the mirror right here, I’ll simply demand that it tells us where the castle is.” He cleared his throat as he pulled out the mirror he had taken from Rarity a little earlier. “Mirror, mirror in my hoof, show us where this dragon is. And make it snappy!”

The mirror’s screen began to whirl a little as it showed a picture of the castle.

“Well that’s hardly any help, stupid thing must be broken. I wanted directions, not a picture! Whatever, luckily as a prince I have an expert sense of direction!”

“Sire, you got lost in the mall’s food court…”

“That was when I was a child, Consort.”

“Yes, but I’m also referring to the incident two months ago as well.”

“Oh just shut up you old geezer,” the prince mumbled as he headed into the forest, the mob of ponies cautiously following the prince. None of them probably had much faith in the prince’s sense of direction, but it was probably better than their own. After all, not many who entered the Everfree Forest came back to tell the tale. “Now If I was a castle where would I go…”

“He’s not serious, is he?” Feather Duster whispered. “Consort, you have to say something, he’s going to get us all lost.”

“And what do you suppose I should say, hmm?” The advisor mumbled back. “He’s gone off the deep end, he’s not going to listen to reason until he gets what he wants. The sooner we find this castle and get this all done with the sooner we can all go home.”

“I can’t believe you’re just going to let him do this…” huffed the maid. “It’s sad how you just let him walk all over you. For the love of the goddess, grow a backbone.” Consort didn’t respond to her this time, walking by her side, head down and silent. “Pathetic…”

“Ah ha!” Blueblood shouted. “I think I found it! Behold, the terrifying castle of the dragon!”

“Umm… sir.”

“Shut up, now we need to think of a way to break into it. I’m thinking we use these torches to burn a hole into it.”

“Sir I—“

“Or we could take a more direct approach.”

“Sire, this is not a castle!” Consort finally snapped. “It’s a wooden hut!”

“What are you talking about?” Wondered the prince, waving a hoof at Zecora’s tree hut. “This is a strange building in the middle of a magical forest! Obviously it’s where are dragon is. You can be so stupid sometimes, you know that?” The young prince gave a huff as he turned to his mob. “Alright ponies, take whatever you can find, but remember the drake is mine!”

“Kill the drake!” The mob of ponies screamed as they went charging into the tree hut, breaking down the wooden door of its hinges and sending it flying across the room. Stallions and mares alike howled like barbaric animals as they randomly smashed and crushed anything they could get their hooves on.

“Now where is that dragon?” Blueblood said aloud as he flipped over a pot.

“WHAT ARE YOU PONIES DOING IN MY HOME?” A very angry roared as she came from the other room. She had her mane and body wrapped up in pink frilly towels and she was still very damp and bubbly, probably because she was in the middle of a bath before her home was invaded. “I do not care the reason, just go, go, GO!”

“Dear lord, what the heck is that thing?” Baffled the prince. “It’s like some sort of weird penguin pony.”

“Beware, beware! Leave, before my anger flares!” Growled the zebra. “Can I not even have a soak, without being disturbed by you pony folk!?”

“Oh like I’m afraid of some dude in a pink bath robe,” spat the prince. “Do your worst.”

Zecora's brow crescent as her eyes started to glow a brilliant green. Magic sparkled from her irises as her body levitated from the spot. With her towel whisked away in the turbulence she created, the zebra’s strange magic blasted all the ponies out of the hut and back into the forest.

The mob of ponies screamed in the air, those without wings flailing helplessly as they landed in trees and bushes, while the pegesi tried their best to gain control of their selves. When the dust had cleared they were miles from the outskirts of town, and deep within the Everfree Forest.

“Well that was a rather rude pony thingy,” Blueblood mumbled to himself, picking himself up and brushing himself off. “Consort make a note to lynch that pony when we get back.”

Consort sighed. “Very well, sire. Just let me find my notepad, I think I may have lost it in the blast of that zebra’s magic. Although I can hardly blame her, it was technically a home invasion.”

“Who cares, I’m the future king of this country. I’ll have her hanged and then have her body deported to whatever backwards nation she came from as a message of my total dominance. Now we need to go and find that castle!”

“Sir, I’d really advise against all of that.”

“Who cares what you think,” frowned Blueblood. “You’re just here to carry my schedule and do all the stuff I don’t want to do. We’re going to the castle and that’s final!”

“…No.”

A strange word for the prince, it made his ears twitch. He looked at the old stallion who had defied him, saying the one word he’d never heard him say to him, at least in this context. “Excuse me?” He said coldly. “I think I must have misheard you. I could have sworn you just defied me but there’s no way you’d be that stupid.”

“N-no Blueblood,” Consort stuttered, trying to muster up whatever courage he could find. “I-I can’t just sit on the sidelines and let you do this anymore. Everything else you’ve done in the past two weeks I’ve had to go behind your back and fix or plan to fix. I’ve written dozens of apology letters and paid off several ponies to overlook your stupidity but I won’t enable you any longer. You’re going to abandon this mad dream of kingship and accept the fact that your aunt chose Cadence over you. It doesn’t mean that she doesn’t love you any less but please sire, let’s just go home…”

Lightning struck as the prince looked at his long-time advisor stood there, shaking and breathing in the heavy rain that began to pour. Blueblood slowly began to approach Consort, staring a dagger like glare at the old stallion. It looked like he was about to kill him for speaking out but the prince was surprisingly calm. Angered in mind, but sane of body as he said to him, “Then leave, you old fool. You’ll not stand in my way to greatness.”

“Sire, I love you like a son but don’t do this!”

“I’m the sole wielder of the Elements of Harmony!” He snapped. “I alone defeated Nightmare Moon and Discord, two of our history’s greatest villains! I am of the royal bloodline and I will not be denied my greatness! You and anyone else who doesn’t want to follow me into battle can go crawl back into your holes and live with the guilt and shame that you fled your future king in his hour, that you didn’t defend your homes, that you didn’t help me rid this world of evil!” Prince Blueblood turned around to the rest of the pony mob, who had all been listening uncomfortably to this argument. “That goes to you as well! Are you ponies, or are you rats?! Anypony that’s not worth his horseshoes can leave. I only want the best of the best to walk by my side into prominence.”

A few murmurs were heard from the mob, but no pony dared flee after that speech, in fear of being called a coward. Besides, they still had to protect their homes from the dragon. With a nod from Blueblood, they followed him deeper into the forest in search of the enchanted castle, leaving Consort and Feather Duster alone in the mud and rain.

“You… you actually stood up to him,” smiled Feather Duster.

“I’ve condemned him to death is what I did,” muttered Consort, slumping into the mud in tears. “I don’t ever expect anypony to understand, but I raised that boy from a foal…when others wish death upon him I think the opposite, I tried my best but this is my ultimate failing. I failed him, Feather Duster…I couldn’t save him from himself.”

*****

“I. Am. So. Bored…” groaned Pinkie Stick, lying on the floor of the main hall. “Does anypony want to play I Spy?”

“For the last time, no!” Twiclock mumbled. “I swear…can somepony please think of another game for us to play?”

The rest of the clocks friends said nothing. They were all too depressed to do anything. It seemed that they were falling back into their old habits once again, lying around the floor doing nothing, barely finding the will and energy to stay awake.

“Why bother...” Tankardjack yawned. “It’s not like it’ll do much. Best to just live and let live I reckon.”

Flutterbench sniffled. “I’m so sad…I don’t want to be a bench forever!”

“Do y’all think there’s any chance that Rainbow Cup got to Rarity and convinced her to come back?”

The clock shook her head. “Doubt it, but stranger things have happened…like a stupid curse that turns ponies into castleware.”

“Or a giant mob heading towards the castle…”

“Exactly Pinkie Stick, that’s another example.”

“No, I mean there’s a giant mob of ponies heading towards the castle. I think your brother’s in there, Tankardjack.”

“Huh?!”

They all got up from their lazy flanks (or the equivalent of one) and hopped towards the castle’s window. There they all saw the approaching horde of Ponyville ponies marching at the metal gates, chanting ‘Kill the Drake!’ over and over again as the biggest of the stallion s kicked down the metal gates.

“Holy freaking horesapples!” Twiclock screamed. “Invaders!”

“My Celestia!”

“What are we going to do!?”

“We fight back…”

They all turned around. “Flutterbench?”

“I always knew this day would come,” she said, walking ominously towards the kitchen. “If it’s a fight that they want, then it’s a fight they’ll get.”

Pinkie Stick turned uncomfortably on the spot. “Umm, are you okay Flutters?”

“Very,” the hoof rest said. “Now, I don’t know about you but I don’t want to be a bench for the rest of my life. I want to see Angel Bunny and Mr. Beaverton and all my other animal friends again. Rainbow Cup has never let us down before, and we’re not going to let her down! Now come on, everypony! I have a plan…”

"End is nigh! Say goodbye!

As we slowly reach the climax!

By tonight our story will reach its bitter end.

Final song, sing-along,

It’s the end unless we’re wrong…

So save the drake!”

*****

“Alright, everypony,” Blueblood announced as his mob circled the castle’s door. “I am almost certain that this is the right castle!”

The mob nodded in agreement. This definitely looked like a castle a dragon would hide in. However, every pony knew that there would only be one way to find out, and that would be to go inside. A hesitant idea for most of them, for it was one thing to barge into a small tree house hut, and another to barge into a stony dark castle in the middle of a lightning storm.

Blueblood noticed this and gave a little huff. “Well what are you goat bellies waiting for? Don’t you want to protect your town? And don’t forget that you have the sole wielder of the Elements of Harmony as your fearless leader. Now charge!”

And they did just that. The pony mob let out a thunderous scream as they rammed past the door of the castle as if it were construction paper. Pitchforks and torches in hoof they roamed the main hall with a steady caution. They had no idea what sort of tricks this castle had in store for them.

And their caution was well placed, for standing in the middle of the floor was a single candlestick and a black powder pistol.

“What an odd combination to be laying on the floor,” one of the ponies said, poking at it with the end of his shovel. “What do you think it is?”

“It’s a distraction.”

Everypony looked up towards the rather assertive voice, but where they expected a pony or perhaps the dragon, they found nothing but a few assorted knick knacks.

Flutterbench stood up from onto her back legs, a rather sinister smile on her cushion face as she announced, “Attack…if you want to that is.”

Now the funny thing about castles is that they are usually quite big, with many tall rooms and dark cellars, and these are just breeding grounds for wonderful creatures such as rats and bats, as well as spiders and frogs, any critter that could appreciate a good dark corner found a home in the castle, and Flutterbench; still Fluttershy in spirit, befriended each and every one of them, finding fruit and cheese or flies or giving them rides when they were tired of walking. In any case, every creature that lived in that castle were friends of the shy little bench, which made her enemies their enemies.

Bats swooped down from the ceiling in a screeching frenzy of fangs as they attacked and scratched ponies from above, getting into ponies manes and faces. The fat rats appeared from the cracks and holes in the walls of the castle, skittering into the fray with snarling teeth and twitching whiskers. Spiders descended down from their webs and enthralled ponies in a weak web of stickiness and arachnophobia.

The ponies didn’t know what to do, so they acted on instinct. Screaming and thrashing the bats with their torches to keep them at bay only left them open to a rat attack, and those who stopped to swat them off would find themselves hopelessly overpowered by the critters sheer numbers. Even the unicorns found themselves in a bind, unable to use their larger spells in fear of hurting their fellow ponies, they tried simple fireball spells and magical blasts, but the spiders would quickly crawl onto their faces and blocked their vision. It was a losing battle.

“Fight harder you cowards!” Blueblood ordered as he disintegrated a small platoon of roaming rats while stepping on a spider. “They’re just pests! We must keep pushing forward. Get in formation!”

The ponies knew he was right, and started fighting harder. They began buddying up with torch bearers, one pony swatting at the ground while the other swung their torches at the air. Flutterbench’s army began staving back as the ponies started to form an enclosed formation of fire and steel.

“That’s it, now keep pushing forward!”

“Uh oh,” gulped Twiclock. “It’s not working! They’re getting up the stairs.”

“What are we going to do?” Asked Tankardjack.

“Don’t worry, I have a back-up plan,” the bench said. “I had hoped that I wouldn’t have to wake them up so early, but we have no choice.”

“Flutterbecnh?”

“Mr. Cloud!” she called, “We need some assistance!”

“Mr. Cloud? Who’s that?”

They would find out in a few moments as the large window behind them shattered and a dark, hulking figure came crashing through and landed in front of the ponies. Standing in the debris of glass and stone was one of the most terrifying creatures the Everfree Forest had ever produced. Four times the size of the biggest pony, with razor-like teeth, wings of a bat, head of a demonic dog, body of a bull, talons of a falcon and was made completely out of stone. Mr. Cloud was a gargoyle, and a rather grumpy one, considering his rather early awakening.

Flutterbench’s friends were in shock. “Since when does the castle have a mother bucking gargoyle?!”

“He’s been living on the roof longer than we have been here. He usually sleeps twenty hours a day and doesn’t like to be bothered, but I told him that this was really important.”

The pony army was petrified by its hollow eyes as it shrieked a warning cry at them. The critters from earlier quickly fled from the path of Cloud in horror as it made a slow advance towards the mob.

“I’m out!” Screamed Thunderlane as he flapped away, crying in fits as he made his escape. “I’m not fighting that thing!”

“E-e-eeyup,” trembled Big Macintosh as he too turned tail and ran away. One by one the ponies all came to the realization that fighting a gargoyle was a fool’s battle and made their retreat. All of them ran away…

All but one.

“You think you can take me?!” Roared the headstrong Prince Blueblood. “An oversized pebble like you could never hope to defeat—“

THWACK!!

Mr. Cloud had gotten rather bored with the prince’s ramblings and had smacked him across the room with formidable force. So forceful in fact that Blueblood broke through the wall he was smashed into. He was hit so hard that he continued to fly uncontrollably through that wall to break through yet another wall.

The trauma from getting hit through two walls was dire, and if it wasn’t for the royal blood pumping through his veins and his ancestry with alicorns he would have perished. Instead he lay limply on the ground, clinging to the last bit of consciousness that he had. In a fit of groans he tried to get up but he couldn’t feel any of his legs. He only had one choice. With the last of his magical reserves he performed a rejuvenation spell on himself. It took every last drop of his magic but he was able to heal his body enough to get back up. It would be awhile before even he could cast a spell again, but that didn’t matter. He did after all have the Elements at his disposal.

“Note to self, kill that rocky thing on my way out,” he muttered. “Now to find that dragon…”

“What do you want?”

“Huh—cheese and crackers there you are!” The prince gasped. No pony had realized that the gargoyle had hit Blueblood so hard that he was knocked into the west wing. Spike sat next to the window, staring into the faint reflection it gave him. He looked sad as he turned around to see who had intruded him, he didn’t even seem to care that it was Prince Blueblood, he just went back to the window and stayed looking depressed.

“Leave me alone,” the dragon said.

“Yeah, you liked that, wouldn’t you, you monster?!” Blueblood barked back at him. “Well you can beg all you want because there is no way that I’m letting you live! Not after all you’ve done to me!”

The drake sighed. “What did I do to you?”

“You caused me to not become king!”

“Really, I did that? I haven’t left this castle in over a year. And trust me, if I did go outside, I’d have better things to do than ruin your life.”

Blueblood sneered. “Don’t think you can talk your way out of this! I’m going to slay you, then everypony will see that I’m the leader that they deserve, that they need!”

“If you say so…”

“And furthermore, I will show everypony that I am the most powerful pony in the world!”

“That’s great, but I really don’t care.”

“And I will prove to them all that I’m not gay!”

“Oh, for good…” Spike paused. “Wait what?”

“You heard me!” Blueblood said. “I know everypony talks behind my back! They say that I’m some sort of coltcuddler and should just come out of the closet already. But I’m not gay! I like mares! Oh, sure I mistake a stallion for a mare every now and again but who hasn’t? I’m sure you’ve done that, right?”

Spike looked bewildered as he slowly shook his head.

“Oh well, look at you, Mister Perfect,” groaned the prince. “But it won’t matter, I’m going to destroy you and prove to everypony that I’m straight!”

“I thought this was to be king…”

“That too! It’s sort of a double whammy. Like what happened at summer camp, why did I say that? You shut up dragon! Stop putting gay thoughts in my head!”

“I—“

“Sure it was the best summer of my entire life but it meant nothing! That’s what I keep telling them! I’m a prince so I have to keep the standard! I have to be the most stallion of the stallions!”

The prince was left breathless as Spike just stared at him. “Do you want to know what I think, Blueblood?”

“Not really, but for conversation’s sake speak.”

“I think you’re gay.”

“YOU’RE GAY!”

“Listen to me, moron,” droned the dragon. “From what you’ve said—“

“No, you listen to me,” Blueblood interrupted. “I don’t care what you think! You’re going to die anyways!” He said, ripping off his frontal tuxedo necktie and blouse piece. Underneath were the six sparkling jewels that represented the Elements of Harmony. The young stallion smirked as he stared down the uncaring dragon. “I am the sole wielder of the Elements of Harmony, and you’re time is up. Now die!”

He pushed his chest forward and began to concentrate. He would unleash the full wrath of Equestria’s most powerful weapon at this beast, and finally prove to all that he was the best, that he deserved to be king and that he wasn’t gay. However, there was a slight problem…

The Elements did nothing.

Prince Blueblood was confused, tapping on the magical and dormant crystals. “C’mon, work! I command you to work! Why aren’t these stupid things working?”

“Because you’re not the true bearer of those The Elements,” a lavishly familiar voice chuckled. From the shadows, Ding-a-ling appeared, his purple stained face curled up into a yellow tooth smile. “You never were and never will be you overgrown idiot.”

“Ding-a-ling…” Spike scowled. “What are you doing here?”

“I came to watch the finale, you have less than forty minutes before midnight and I didn’t want to miss a thing. Plus, if I missed watching Blueblood realize that he’s not the wielder of the Elements of Harmony I would simply die.”

“What are you talking about? Of course I am! I’m Prince Blueblood, The sole wielder of the—“

“No, you’re Prince Blueblood, the stallion that thinks he’s the Element wielder,” laughed the bell hung pony. “Your past conquests and endeavors are no more than a false memory I created for you.”

“Impossible!”

“Not at all,” Ding-a-ling said. “It was all part of my spell, a spell that’s actually simple in nature but still quite effective. Even I do not possess the power to change the pass and history. But memory charms are quite simple to cast, and what I can do is cast it on a global scale. Wiping the memories of everypony in the continent and rewriting it, reshaping it, into something else. You only think that you’re the wielder of the Elements, Blueblood, but you never were.”

“I don’t believe you!” The prince snarled. “I’m Prince Blueblood! The greatest of the royal bloodline! It was I that took down Nightmare Moon and thwarted Discord.”

Ding-a-ling laughed. “Get it through your thick head, kid. You’re nothing more than a character in a much greater story.” He turned his attention to Spike. “And you, Spike the dragon. I can’t lie and say that I’m not a little disappointed in you. I really thought you were different. I thought that you would fight for Rarity.”

“Don’t you even dare to say her name you monster!” The dragon screamed. “I had no choice. I love her with all my heart…and that’s why I let her go. Even if it meant being miserable and like this for the rest of my life.”

There was a looming quietness as the three of them stood there in the room, the mental ticking of their internal clocks grew closer to the final moments of the contract. In a matter of minutes, the spell would become permanent and Spike would never become the creature of Rarity’s affection. The hulking purple drake looked once more into the icy rainfall to shed one more tear for her. Rarity was such a wonderful mare, she would find happiness with somepony else and hopefully forget about him.

“Rarity…I love you.”

“I love you too.”

His heart skipped a beat. He must have misheard that voice; a delusion of his growing depression, but it was too pure to be a voice in his head. Spike slowly turned around, and there she was. Standing at the door, shivering in the cold but still she was there. Rarity’s eyes met Spike’s as she started making her way towards him.

“You came back…”

“Of course I did, Spike,” she smiled. “You were in trouble…I had to make sure you were alright.”

“But what about your father?” Spike asked.

“He’ll live. He’s far too stubborn to die. Besides, the world wouldn’t be as interesting without him (and also a lot more bearable) but I needed to check up on you. There…there were a few things that I didn’t get a chance to say before I left.”

Spike took a step forward. “Yes, Rarity?”

“I…” she said, leaning up towards the dragon’s face, once again finding herself getting lost in those deep green eyes. “I never got to say thank you for everything. And that I…” She bit her tongue a little, but she knew now it was time to confess.

“I love you.”

They both spoke at the same time as their lips finally met. After all this time they finally shared a true kiss. Spike’s heart began to feel a searing sensation, like it was going to stop. His bones got twitchy and his muscled grew tense. Was this the feeling of love? If it was then it would be a feeling he would never forget, and as he parted from Rarity’s snow white lips and looked into her sapphire eyes he felt another thing.

Magic started to overtake him as he was slowly lifted into the air, magical swirls of silver and gold engulfed him as he began to glow. In the other room the same thing was happening to all his friends. One by one, Tankardjack, Flutterbench, Twiclock, Pinkie Stick and even Rainbow Cup (who had once again stowed away in Rarity’s saddlebag) began to hover and glow. Within moments it was over, and a flash overtook The kingdom of Equestria. It was like a great awakening, as everypony began to remember what was once forgotten. The Apples remembered that they had a sister, the Sparkles that they had a daughter. Everything in a blink of an eye had been like it had been before the contract.

Twilight and her friends were dropped from the air, falling to the ground with thud.

“Ow!” Twilight groaned, rubbing her head with her hooves. “Wait a minute…head, hooves. Girls! She did it! Rarity broke the spell! We’re pony again!”

“Sweet hayseeds in a corn field!” Applejack cheered, kicking the tankard cup that she had been for so long away with her powerful legs. “Rarity pulled through for us.”

“YES!” Rainbow screamed, bolting straight through the window, shattering the glass as she did several gleeful twirls in the air. “I can fly again! I’m not a stupid tea cup anymore! My life once again has meaning!”

It was true. After such a terrible year, they were all pony again. However, as the light faded from Spike, those in the room noticed something strange. Spike landed back on his two feet, opened his eyes and looked into his dragon claws.

“Wait a minute, this isn’t right!” Spike worried, feeling his scales to see if this wasn’t just a dream. “Why am I still a dragon? The contract I signed said that I would become beautiful.”

“Spikey…” Rarity cooed, as she wrapped her hooves around him. “You’re beautiful just the way you are. And I’m sorry it took me so long to realize that. Can you ever forgive me for what I’ve put you through?”

“O-of course,” wept Spike, hugging her back and giving her another kiss. “I could never stay mad at you.”

“Wait, wait, wait!” Blueblood frowned, interrupting what could have been a special moment. “…What on earth am I doing here? And why do I have the Elements of Harmony? Oh no, auntie will have my hide if she thinks I stole these from her! I need to get back to Canterlot now!” He began calling out for his servants. “Consort! Consort where are you? Blast that old fool…never around when I need…him…oh dear. I left him in the Everfree Forest…Now how’ll I get home?!”

There was a loud crashing in the kitchen and the sound of china being smashed as Rainbow began laughing maniacally. “Yes! Die, tea cups, die!” she howled, her laughter being followed by more china shattering.

Applejack voice was heard as well. “Rainbow, I know you’re happy and all, but do you really have to break every dish and cup in the kitchen? You’re making a mess!”

“You don’t have power over me anymore!”

“I—hey! Watch where you throw those things! Dang blast RD, that one almost hit me!”

“I won’t miss this time!” Rainbow snickered. “This is for making me sleep in a cupboard!”

The two ponies continued to argue in the kitchen, creating quite a ruckus. But in the end it didn’t matter. Spike and Rarity were finally together, their love conquering all.

“So…” pondered Rarity. “When do you plan on filling me in on what happened over the last year?”

Spike chuckled to himself. “I’ll tell you later. But trust me, it’s a great story.”

Author's Note

THERE WILL BE ONE FINAL CHAPTER OF THIS STORY, AN EPILOGUE TO WRAP THINGS UP AND EXPLAIN ANYTHING THAT NEEDS TO BE EXPLAINED!

Epilogue: Happiness

A few days down the road…

It was late afternoon in Ponyville, and every pony in town was headed to the same place, the Carousel Boutique. A grand party was being held there in honor of Rarity and Spike’s newly found relationship, and the course safe return of the Elements of Harmony and their rightful bearers. Ponies were laughing, drinks and food were served, and several stories were exchanged as Rarity and took another sip of her drink. She and Twilight were sitting by the table when she asked.

“Okay, so run it through me one more time, because I still don’t think I fully understand…” Rarity said as she waved over another order of drinks. “So you guys were stuck in that castle as kitchen wares for a whole year?”

“And then some,” muttered her friend. “I never want to have to go through something like that again.”

“I can imagine…” sighed Rarity. “Still, at least it’s all over now.”

“Tell me about it. After all this mayhem; I think I’m going to take a nice long vacation. I hear Saddle Arabia is nice this time of year. Do you mind looking after your new drakefriend for me?”

Rarity blushed a little at that last bit. She still wasn’t use to calling him that, though every time she heard it she got butterflies in her stomach. It was such a wonderful revelation. “Yes, I suppose that he could spend a few weeks here…or, you know…”

“Or what?”

“Well, I mean—you know what? Don’t worry about it,” the white mare said, quickly grabbing her drink from the walking waiter and taking a drink. “Let’s just forget that I said anything.”

“Rarity, what are you thinking about?” Twilight smirked. “You’re not having any unladylike thoughts about the situation, are you?”

“N-no!” Rarity stammered. “I’m just thinking that maybe while you’re on vacation that maybe Spike and I could go on a trip of our own. I’m sure he’s exhausted with all that’s happened as well. We all deserve a little rest now, don’t you think?”

Twilight smiled as she cheered Rarity’s glass. “Agreed, just don’t wear him too out with your extracurricular activities.”

“Please dear, you’re going to make me blush.”

Twilight was about to continue when she was interrupted. “Ex-excuse me…” a trembling voice moaned from behind them. Twilight and Rarity turned around to see Princess Celestia and Prince Blueblood approaching them. The posh, snobby prince head was staring down at the floor and he looked like he really didn’t want to be here.

“Princess Celestia!” Twilight gasped, immediately bowing her head. “We didn’t expect you to be coming.”

“I’m afraid I’m just here for a few minutes,” smiled the sun princess. “I just came by because my nephew has something very important to say to you.” She looked down towards Blueblood, giving him a few nudges. “Isn’t that right?”

“Yes auntie…” he groaned, barely looking up from the floor. “Miss Rarity…I just wanted to say I’m—” He gagged a little, like he was about to throw up. “I’m…I’m…I’m sor…” His voice started to trail off, causing Celestia to frown and give him another nudge. “I’m sorry!” He finally blurted out.

“For…” Celestia hummed, expecting Blueblood to continue with his apology.

“For trying to throw put your father into a mental ward.”

“And?”

“And for locking you in your basement.”

“And?”

“And for not being a gentlecolt around you.”

“And?”

“Auntie, please! I said I was sorry!” The prince whined. “What more do you want from me?!”

“You’re forgetting the most important thing,” she said. “Something along the lines of you rallying a horde of ponies to kill her drakefriend.”

“Oh right…and whatever auntie said as well.” Celestia gave Blueblood a much harder nudge this time. “Ouch! I’m sorry I tried to kill your dragon friend! Now can we please go home now? I’m starting to get light headed from all this apologizing.”

The princess smiled. “Yes we can. I hope you girls have a nice party, and Rarity I wish you and Spike all the happiness in the world.”

“Thank you, Princess,” smiled Rarity. “But all I need is my Spikey wikey.”

Celestia was about to say something but Blueblood kept tugging at her mane. “Auntie, let’s go!”

“Then go wait in the carriage, your colouring books are in there,” Celestia grumbled. “There’s a few other things I need to deal with before leaving here,” she gave her goodbyes and started heading towards the kitchen. Blueblood started to wander out of the room.

“Well that was rather strange…” Twilight wondered. “Anyways, where were you thinking of taking Spike for your little vacation? I hear the Hot Springs up north are nice.”

“Maybe,” She said. “But I’m going to talk to Spike about this; we can probably find a place that we both can agree on.”

“I don’t know Rare,” a deep, loving voice said, sneaking up on the mare and covering her eyes with his claws. “Those hot springs sound fantastic, and it’d be the perfect excuse to take another seven hour bubble bath.”

“Hello there, darling,” Rarity smugly smiled, spinning around and giving the dragon she loved a quick kiss on his cheek. “I take it that you’ve heard what we were talking about?

“A little,” Spike admitted. “But we can probably talk about it later. So Twilight, do you mind if I go on this vacation with Rarity?”

Twilight nodded. “The way I see it, you’re not exactly a baby dragon anymore, so from now on, unless it’s really important, you can pretty much do whatever you want. Just please tell me what you’re doing before you do it.”

“No problem Twilight.”

“Good,” smiled the purple unicorn as she got up from her seat and started heading towards the door. “Now I have to head home and start packing for my trip. You two love birds try to keep it PG rated, alright?”

The two rolled their eyes as they waved goodbye to Twilight. Spike and Rarity needed to plan their vacation anyways. “So I was thinking of booking a train for three days from now, that’ll give me enough time to pack for the week, and of course we need to start gathering some funds so we can go shopping.”

“Oh and you’ll really want to check out this one restaurant there, it has the greatest spinach salad on the planet.”

“That’s a wonderful idea—wait who said that?” Rarity wondered, looking around the table. She didn’t see anyone besides Spike, who looked equally confused as to what was going on, but when she looked back in front of her, she saw of all ponies Ding-a-ling sitting across from her. “Eek!” she squeaked. “What are you doing here?”

“Oh, me?” Chuckled the strange stallion, taking a sip from a cup of strange liquid. “Well last we met you guys all ran out of the castle so fast, I never got a chance to have you thank me.”

Spike and Rarity looked puzzled. “Excuse me!?” They both said at once.

“You heard me? I went through all that trouble to make you two love each other and I didn’t get so much as a ‘Thank you Ding-a-ling’ from either of you. It was rather rude to be completely honest.”

Spike snarled. “Rude? Do you know what was rude? Putting us through all of that for no good reason?!”

“No good reason?!” Ding-a-ling gasped. “I had a good reason. What do you think I am? Some sort of crazy pony?”

They nodded.

“Oh you two suck,” he groaned. “Think about it, if I hadn’t done what I had done would you of ever finally fallen in love with each other? You dragon needed to learn that you shouldn’t have to change in order to please somepony else, if they can’t love you for you then it’s not worth it. And you, Miss Rarity, you needed to learn that true loves sees from the heart and that it shouldn’t matter if someone’s a little different or a dragon. If you love them then love them. Honestly, you two have been dancing around the stick for so long I’m surprised I didn’t intervene sooner.”

“I…but…how?”

“My methods may be a little unorthodox and maybe border on the sociopathic, but in the end you cannot argue with my results, now can you?”

Spike and Rarity wanted to argue back, say something that hadn’t already been said. But what bell headed pony had said did make a little sense. As cruel as he may have been he had created a (rather bizarre) scenario in which they could finally say they loved each other. Perhaps that was the push they needed. They decided to just nod a little and thank Ding-a-ling for what he did, even though they still felt a little strange about doing it.

“Thank you…I guess.”

“You’re very welcome,” smiled Ding-a-ling. “Now if you’ll excuse me, I have more mischief to create and more lives to better.” He got up from the table and headed to the door. “Fair thee well, and have a nice life!” He disappeared beyond the door and started walking down the road. Most ponies didn’t pay him much mind, with the exception of a pony here or there. But even that wasn’t anything more than a quick glance. “Now…to find more ponies to help.”

“Ding-a-ling!” A rather angry voice boomed from behind him. He turned around, his smile dropping when he saw a disgruntled Celestia marching towards him. The strange pony gulped as he stopped in his tracks.

“Princess Celestia…what an honour,” he said nervously.

“Ding-a-ling…” The princess frowned. “You have some explaining to do!”

“Heh…”

“I just came back from talking to Applejack and Rainbow Dash, and they said you turned them into a teacup and a tankard glass?! Is this true?” Ding-a-ling was sweating beads. With no other option in sight he turned tail and ran for it. Celestia went running after him as well. “Don’t think that you can outrun me! You and I are going to have a little talk, mister!”

“I didn’t have a choice!” Ding-a-ling shouted. “It’s not my fault that they walked in on the transformation! I panicked and just did the first thing that popped into my head!”

“We’ve been through this before, you can’t just change ponies into things without consulting me first! That was our agreement, you bell headed fool. If it weren’t for your invaluable magic I would have had you contained centuries ago!”

The two ran off out of town and into the wide open plains of Equestria. Eventually Celestia would catch him, and punish him accordingly, and he wouldn’t actually learn anything and probably do it again. But as long as he didn’t do anything too evil, and continued to show positive outcomes with his magic he would be allowed to wander free into the world, finding ponies with problems, and helping them all with his special brand of magic. Even as he ran for his life from the princess he couldn’t help but smile as he wondered...

“Now who shall I help next?”

THE END

Author's Note

And there you have it! Everything wrapped in a pretty little bow for you all! Don't like? Tough petunias, I'm moving on with life!

I do however hope that you all enjoyed this fic, and I do encourage you all to stick around and get ready for the next installment (but an actual sequel) as FlimFlam'd Disney proudly presents...

Lamp!

Cover art by blazewingthunder

A Rose for my Love?

Beauty and Her Spike
The Greatest Sparity Ever Told

Chapter 1: A Rose for my Love?

Celestia’s sun rose high over Ponyville, as it seemed to do on most days. The pegasi had done a great job clearing the skies; not a cloud or blemish marred it. The birds chirped and sang their cheery tunes, a squirrel scurried up a tree with a mouth full of nuts to store for winter, as the snow storms were to soon come, and most of the animals were getting ready for hibernation. But there was one creature that was just waking up, and as the light of the sun peeked through the window of the Ponyville Library, a little purple dragon rubbed his eyes.

The drake gave a big yawn as he turned in his sleep. He slowly sat up, still groggy with morning fatigue. He gave another big yawn as he stretched his arms out, arching his back as he did so. Giving his head a few shakes, he looked over to Twilight’s bed. The bed was empty, the purple unicorn had already gotten up, probably downstairs studying or something. As Spike slowly walked out of his bed, he caught a glance out the window.

“It sure is a beautiful day,” he said quietly to himself as he walked towards the window, sticking his head out to soak in all the sun. He observed the animals and the quiet town come to life, the ponies going on with their daily business. Little fillies and colts skipped and pranced towards school, where their teacher happily greeted her students. In the center of town, the many stands were setting up, getting ready for the daily market. It seemed like an average day in Ponyville, but today was very special for a certain dragon…

“Today is the day!” sighed Spike as he gazed out the window as he slumped his head into his claws. In the distance, he could see the Carousal Boutique off in the distance. It was by far the most beautiful building in town, and it was also home to the prettiest mare in Ponyville, probably even Canterlot. “Today is the day,” he hummed to himself, slowly slipping into something a little more…

“It’s a wonderful day, say’s I,

There’s not a single cloud in the sky

And today will be great, cause today is the day,

It’s a wonderful day say’s I!"

The dragon turned around, and quickly but carefully scurried down the wooden steps of the library and into the main living area. From there he could smell the delicious scent of hay bacon and fried rubies, his favorite breakfast! He willingly followed the enticing aromas of the sizzling bacon, almost floating to the smell of the scent. He opened the door to be greeted by Twilight Sparkle, his official/unofficial boss, caretaker, and big sister. The unicorn was nose deep in a book while she tended to breakfast with a simple levitation spell.

“Good morning Twilight!” piped Spike happily, taking a seat next to the mare.

“Oh, good morning Spike, did you have a good sleep?” asked Twilight sincerely, breaking away from her book for a second to greet the little dragon.

“The best!” he said happily. “But who wouldn’t be happy today? Today is going to be the greatest day ever!” His stomach grumbled. “Hey, umm Twi, when’s breakfast going to be done?”

The mare rolled her eyes as she levitated the pan of food towards Spike, dumping the contents of the pan onto the dragon’s plate. “Eat up,” she giggled.

“Thanks!” said the little drake, staring starry eyed at the food. Without wasting another moment, the dragon dug into his breakfast, not taking manners into mind. “This is great, Twilight!”

“Spike, don’t talk with your mouth open,” grumbled the unicorn, a piece of stray food flinging onto her cheek. “You’re going to get dragon drool on my book.”

“Sorry Twilight,” sighed Spike, licking his mouth clean of all leftover food. “What are you reading anyways?”

“This new romance novel I ordered from Canterlot!” the purple mare smiled, “It’s called ‘The Blindness of Her Aching Heart.’ It’s really interesting! It has dragons and swordfights, and a prince in disguise.” She clutched the book to her chest as she let out a dreamy sigh. “I wish I could meet somepony as great as the prince in this book.

Spike scrunched his face up as he made gagging sounds. “Sounds girly, I’m out of here. Later Twilight!” called the dragon as he threw his dirty plate into the sink and rushed out the door. “Girly and sappy, blah that’s not for me,” he grumbled, quickly forming a smile. “Romance on the other hoof… well...”

“It’s a beautiful day, indeed,

Birds are singing in all the trees!

There’s a cat and a mouse, making love in a house!

It’s a wonderful day says I!”

“WHAT?!”

Spike turned around to see a magenta mare with a deep red mane. Berry Punch’s face was frozen in a state of shock, disbelief, and confusion.

Spike nervously giggled. “Sorry, I needed a rhyme.” The mare just turned around and continued walking where she was going before she had been shocked. “Now then where was I?”

“It’s a glorious day, you see

Cause I’ll finally tell Rarity…

When I gaze at her face, it makes my heart ache,

My palms get all sweaty,

My heartbeat’s not steady,

But I really don’t care, because I love that mare,

A date there will be, I’m sure she’ll agree!

And it’s a wonderful, wonderful, wonderful day say’s I!

He fell to his knees, spreading his arms and panting heavily. He turned around, witnessing a few ponies that had gotten caught up in the chorus, as there were four mares still holding that last ‘I’ note. He walked away from the crazy ponies and skipped into town.

“Now, if I’m going to ask Rarity out on a date, I’m going to need a flower!” said Spike, looking at the stalls of the market, searching until he found the one he was looking for: The Flower Sisters Flower Stand. At the moment, it was Rose tending the stall. “Hey Rose!”

The amber-mane pony turned from her flowers to see the adorable purple dragon. “Oh, hello there Spike, is there anything that I can help with you with?”

“There is!” explained the dragon excitedly, “I need a flower, a beautiful one, if fact, the most beautiful flower you have please!”

“Ooooooo,” cooed the earth pony, “Is it for your special somepony?”

Spike shook his head. “You bet! It’s for the most beautiful pony in all of Ponyville!”

“Spike, I’m flattered, but you don’t have to do that,” smiled Rose, batting her eyelashes.

“What? No it’s not for you—Not that you’re not pretty! It’s just that—Well, what I mean is--” Spike wiped some sweat off his brow. “Oh no. I’m screwed, aren’t I?”

The mare laughed. “Relax, I’m just teasing you, I know who this is for!” she smiled, reaching into the bushel of roses, and picking out the reddest and healthiest rose in the batch. “Here, on the house, all things considering.”

“Really? Thanks Rose!” the dragon happily cheered, taking the rose in hand. “I’m sure she’ll love it!” He quickly took off, running towards his final destination: The Carousal Boutique.This is it! I can’t believe that I’m actually going to do this! he thought. He stepped up to the door. Puffing up his chest and flexing all his muscle, he knocked. All right Spike, time to make your dreams come true! The door slowly creaked opened. She’s opening the door, oh goddess, she opening the door! The door finally revealed her, the most beautiful mare that he had ever seen, ever since he saw her all that time ago.

Rarity was the picture of beauty. Her perfect violet mane with its bouncing curls that bobbed seductively every time she swayed her head. Her flawlessly-kept coat gleamed like fresh, fallen snow adorned with enticing diamonds. And her face, that caring, beautiful face, and those gorgeous, gorgeous blue eyes shined like blue stars in the night sky. Everything about her made Spike’s legs feel like jelly.

“Well, if it isn’t my little Spiky-wiky!” charmed Rarity. “Now to what do I owe the pleasure of having Ponyville’s cutest dragon come and visit me?”

“H-h-h-hi Rarity!” stammered the baby dragon; all prior confidence had completely vanished. “I was wondering….” His voice trailed off into an inaudible whisper.

“Darling, you’ll have to speak up a little,” said Rarity, turning her head. “You were wondering what, dear?”

“I-I was wondering if you…” His heart was racing; maybe this wasn’t a good idea at all. “I was wondering if you….”

“If I would do what, dear?” asked Rarity innocently. “You don’t have to be so tongue tied around me. You can tell me anything. You know that.”

“Anything?”

The mare put a hoof on the dragon’s shoulder. “Anything, dear.”

Spike took a deep breath. This was it, he was going to tell her everything. The dragon held out the rose that he had gotten from earlier, “Rarity…I really like you.”

“Well, I like you too,” Rarity said, completely oblivious to what Spike had actually meant. “How could I not like such a little cutie pie?” she asked, pinching the dragon’s cheek.

“N-no, I mean, I like, umm…. like-like you.”

Rarity’s smile dropped, “Oh,” she said nervously, turning around so Spike couldn’t see her frustration. “Umm, I think I have some orders to attend to, big winter line up!”

“I’ve liked you since I first saw you,” Spike said, letting it all out. “Sometimes, you’re all that I can think of.”

“That’s really sweet, dear,” the now-sweating mare said, trying to hide her distress behind some red fabric. “But I really have some work I need to catch up with.”

“Well, if you have any time after, do you think…” He held up the rose. “Would you maybe like to go out on a date sometime?” He gritted his teeth in a smile as he waited for her response.

But the unicorn said nothing, and every passing moment that she said nothing quickly ate away at Spike’s hopes. “Spike,” the mare finally sighed, dropping the fabric. “I really am flattered that you have, umm... such strong feelings for me and you are definitely one of the kindest and sweetest dragons I know…”

“And?” asked Spike, building up his hopes.

The unicorn looked down to the ground. “And, I’m afraid that I’ll have to decline.” She bit her lips nervously as she awaited the dragon’s response.

But he didn’t. He just stood there, completely stunned, the sadness and rejection was clear on his face, as a single tear formed at the bottom of his eye. “D-d-decline?” he stuttered. “But why?”

“It’s complicated, dear,” she said, strain in her voice. “You are cute in your, umm, dragonish charms, and you are most helpful.” She sighed; this wasn’t easy for her to say. “And if you were a pony, I would have said yes in a heartbeat.”

“B-but you didn’t!” the small dragon cried. “You didn’t cause I’m a dragon! A stupid, ugly dragon!”

“Spike, I’m appalled!” she gasped. “I never said that! You are not ugly, and I’m sure that there are plenty of dragonesses that would love to go out with you.”

“But I’m not in love with a dragoness,” bawled the dragon. “I’m in love with you!”

“I’m sorry dear,” sighed the pony, bowing her head down. “But the answer is no.”

Spike couldn’t believe it, the mare of his dreams had rejected him, all because he was a dragon. An ugly, stupid dragon that thought he could actually be together with a pony. He couldn’t take it. With a heavy heart and the rose still clenched in his claw, he turned around and ran out of the Boutique, leaving nothing in his wake but a trail of watery tears and misery.

[Edited by Bunsen and Not Worthy]

A Shadow of Himself

“Well gang, how about?” asked Magnum as he and his family walked to the edge of the Everfree Forest. “This looks like it could be fun!”

“But Daddy, the Everfree forest is dangerous!” explained Sweetie Belle. “There’s Timberwolves and Manticores and cockatrices!”

“Oh my!” worried Pearl. “Magnum honey, are you sure this is a good idea? It sounds awfully dangerous.”

“Oh Pearly, I’m sure that those are just rumors that the resorts spread around to make ponies take the long way,” smiled magnum. “It’s all a big scam.”

“Dad, how is that a scam?”

“They want to increase hay prices, Sweetie,” he said. “Everypony is in on it! The hotels, the resorts, the princesses, they all want to take more bits from your average pony so they spread these rumors that there are dangerous monsters in the woods so you have to take the long route.”

“That seems a little far fetch, dear,” said Pearl. “Maybe we should take the main road.”

“Nonsense!” smiled her husband. “There is nothing dangerous in the Everfree forest! And this way, we’ll be saving a whole ten minutes!”

“Well…” mumbled Pearl. “I guess if you’re sure it will be safe.”

“Is any pony even listening to me?!” shouted Sweetie Belle.

“Relax Sweetie Belle,” smiled Magnum as he and his wife pulled the carriage into the woods. “Nothing bad ever happens in the Everfree forest!”

The family started down the path, the light of day still shining down through the tree line. The late autumn birds were flying overhead; most of them would be flying south to Saddle Arabia in a few days when the snow starts to small, fleeing to warmer temperatures and climate for the winter months.

“Well, this is nice,” pepped Pearl. “It’s a beautiful day, the sun is shining. Maybe you were right, dear.”

“See? I told you,” said Magnum. “There’s nothing to worry about. Absoulutly nothing, not a thing can go wrong! No-sir-ee! That’s ain’t going to happen, we are one hundred and fifty THOUSAND percent, safe.”

“We get it…” droned Sweetie Belle from the back. “But I still don’t think this is a good idea.”

“Relax Sweetie, your father knows what he’s doing… I hope,” said her mother, trying to be positive. “You do know we’re going? Right dear?”

“Of course! Just let me check the map,” said Magnum, reaching into his saddle bag and pulling out the map. “Now let’s see here…we’re here…and we need to get here… Which means we need to go… this way!”

Magnum was pointing to the down an old dirt path leading into the darker part of the forest. The very path reeked of wickedness and evil and only a complete buffoon would head down or think it was the right way to go.

“Yep it’s down that path, the one with all the dead trees and scary bats!”

“Umm…”

“C’mon gang!” smiled Magnum as he forcefully tugged onto the reins of the carriage, pulling his wife and daughter down the spooky path. “We’ll be at the resort before you know it! And ten minutes sooner!”

The family continued down the dark road, the further they got in, the creepier the forest got. Soon the sun disappeared from beyond the thicket, and the path became cluttered with overgrown thorn bushes and dead tree branches.

“Oh dear…”

“We’re fine Pearly,” said Magnum. “The map said to go this way, so we go this way.”

“May I see that map for a second, honey?” asked his wife.

“Sure,” he said, passing the map to his wife. She took a quick look at it, running her eyes up and down the paper before her brow burrowed into a frown.

“Magnum.”

“Yes dear?”

“The map is upside down.”

“What? No it’s not!” he said, baffled.

Pearl flipped the map over, and pointed on the map. “We were supposed to go the other way!”’

Magnum took a look at the map again, his face grew pale as he realized his mistake. “Oops.”

“Oops!?” shouted Pearl. “We’re lost in the middle of the Everfree Forest and all you can say is ‘Oops’!? Do you have any idea what this means?!”

“We’re going to lose our ten minutes?”

“We’ve been going the wrong way!” she yelled. “We are going to turn this carriage around and take the main road like we should have in the first place.”

“But what about the ten minutes?”

“FORGET THE TEN MINUTES!” Pearl hollered. “And turn this thing around NOW!”

“Alright, alright…” mumbled Magnum, “I was just trying to save some time…”

Grrrrrrrrrr…

“Umm, dad…”

“Yes Sweetie?”

“Did you hear that growling?” she asked.

“Probably just the wind dear,” said her father, trying to turn their cart around.

“No Dad… It sounded a lot like…”

GRRRRRR!

“Timberwolves!” shrieked Sweetie as she retreated deeper into the carriage, the wooden beasts crawling out of their hiding spots in the bushes and bushel. The family was soon surrounded by half a dozen of the feral woody animals, each one growling and snarling, itching to sink their teeth into their freshly caught prey.

“What are we going to do?!” shrieked Pearl, backing away from the advancing wolves.

“You get Sweetie Belle out of here!” shouted Magnum as he quickly unbuckled himself form the reins. “Go back to Ponyville and get help!”

“But what about you?”

“I’ll distract them long enough to get away safely,” he said.

“No, I won’t let you do that!” she yelled.

“I wasn’t asking dear,” said Magnum, slapping his wife rump. She reared up and charged forward on instinct, running through the wolves and dragging the carriage behind her.

“Be safe Magnum!” she called back, still running down the path.

“Run, Pearl, run!” she shouted back. “Keep Sweetie Belle safe!”

Magnum turned his attention back to the wolves that threatened to eat him at any moment. They slowly started to corner him, eventually backing him into a tree. It was moments later that the first wolf lunged at him.

“Yipe!” gasped Magnum, ducking from the leaping timberwolf, who soared harmlessly over the pony and crashed into the tree behind him. The stallion quickly grabbed the fallen wolf by the tail and swung it towards the pack.

The timberwolves all jumped out of the way of their thrown comrade, giving Magnum enough space and time to make a getaway.

“Run, run, run, run, run!” he muttered to himself, the wolves realizing what was happening and soon gave chase, sprinting after the pony ferociously. Magnum did his best to outrun the beast, running so fast that his tacky straw hat flew right off his head, getting trampled into the ground. “My hat!” he said, turning around to receive it.

GRRRRRRR!

“Get a new hat!” he yelped, forsaking his headwear and running away. “Help! Can anypony heat me?! I need help! All I wanted to do was save ten minutes on traveling time!”

Bonk!

“Ow!” the stallion grumbled. “What the heck was that?” He looked up to see that he had ran into the bars of an old metal gate, and they were creaked open as well. “Oh thank merciful Celestia!” he cried as he rushed in on the other side and closed the gate, separating him from the deadly pack of timberwolves. “That was too close… Where am I?”

He turned around to see a large old castle sitting in the middle of the Everfree Forest.

“Is this a hotel?” Magnum asked himself. “An odd place to put one, I bet this is all the work of the government, trying to get more money from me!”

Grr! BARK BARK BARK!!

“Maybe I can find a post office in there,” he squeaked, running to the front door of the castle. “They certainly could benefit from a gardener. I am so telling the manager this…”

Magnum opened the front door and stared down the empty hallway of the main room of the castle.

“Hello? Is anypony here?” he called out.

“Oh my luna, is that a pony?”

“Pinkie, be quiet…”

“Where is everypony?” wondered Magnum. “This service is terrible! I mean the lighting in here is terrible! I can barely see anything!”

“Poor fellow, must have gotten lost in the woods.”

“KEEP. QUIET. Maybe he’ll go away.”

“I don’t have a reservation, but I was attacked by some wolves the government sent after me for not taking the long road, and I need a place to stay the night!” Magnum called out to the darkness.

“Ah c’mon Twi, he was attacked by governmental wolves sent in by the princesses. Can’t we let him stay one night?”

“Pinkie, those aren’t real, I think he just might be crazy. MORE reason to not let him stay.”

“All I heard was let him stay!”

“Pinkie!”

“Of course you can stay the night!” a perky and happy voice called out.

“Who said that?” asked Magnum, as he noticed a candlestick sitting on a table next to an old clock. He picked up the candle with his hoof and started to look around for the voice. “Where are you?”

“Over here, silly!”

The stallion started to spin around in circles, trying to find his greeter, but he just couldn’t seem to locate her. The halls were empty, the castle silent, he was beginning to think that he was the only one here and he was starting to go crazy, when he felt a couple of light taps on the top of his head. He jumped up in shock as he took a look at the lit candle stick, and how there was the face of a smiling pony etched in the wax.

“Ello!” the candle greeted.

“AH GODDESS DIE!” freaked Magnum, throwing the candle stick to the ground and started stomping on it. “DIE, YOU POSSESED DEMON STICK! DIE!”

“Hey, leave her alone!”

Suddenly, Magnum was surrounded by a dark purple aura. “H-hey! What’s going on here? Put me down! Is this how you treat all your guest?!”

“We’re not a hotel!” growled the clock on the table; the hands on the clock were spinning profusely as they glowed the same shade of purple as the magic that was around Magnum. The face behind the twirling hands looked disgruntled and annoyed. “And we do not take kindly to ponies that try and squish my friends! Pinkie, are you alright?”

“I’m fine Twiclock!” smiled the candlestick, jumping back onto her base. “Oops! How could I forget, we don’t even know each other’s names! I’m Pinkie Stick! And that’s Twiclock, well you already knew that, but just in case I’ll say it again! Hi I’m Pinkie Stick! And that’s Twiclock, well you already knew that, but just in case I’ll say it again! Hi I’m Pink—“

“I get it!” cried Magnum! “You’re Pinkie Stick and she’s Twiclock. Could Twiclock please put me down!”

Twiclock rolled her eyes. “Fine,” she said, dropping Magnum down on the ground with a thud.

“Thank you!” said Magnum, starting to calm down. “It’s so weird, I’ve never seen this kind of spell before… Are all the employees like this?”

“Yeppers!” said Pinkie Stick. “Would you like to meet them?”

“Well, actually, I’ve been trying to find somewhere to send a letter…”

“Did you here that Twiclock? We have a GUEST! I so happy that I could sing!”

“Be…

Our…”

“No Pinkie,” droned the clock, “We don’t want to wake up ‘you-know-who,’ do you?”

“Oops, right!” smiled Pinkie. “We’ll sing by the fire! C’mon mister, you must be freezing! Hey Flutterbench, we have company!”

“What did I say about staying quiet?”

“Ooh… Hello there…” a faint voice whispered.

“Who said that?” asked Magnum as he looked around.

“Down here…”

The stallion looked down at the ground and saw a small wooden hoof stool walk up to him, the fabric was sunshine yellow with light pink trims and stitching.

“Hello,” the bench said again. “Are you lost from the forest?”

“A talking hoof rest? Okay, I’ve gone insane…”

“I’m sorry…” whimpered Flutterbench. “I didn’t mean to make you insane.”

“That’s alright,” sighed Magnum. “It was going to hap-hap-a-a-choo!”

“You see Twiclock, he’s soaked to the bone!” explained Pinkie Stick. “Come on, to the fire!”

“No, no, no, no, no, no, no!” barked the wooden clock as the candlestick and the hoof rest walked into the main resting room where Magnum took a seat on the large lounge chair that sat at the foot of the fire. “No… Not his chair!”

“There you go, how are you feeling now?” asked Pinkie Stick.

“Much better! And this chair is so comfy!”

“Let me get your hooves…if you don’t mind that is?”

“Not at all!” smiled Magnum, letting his hind hooves rest on the timid hoof rest. “What wonderful service!”

“Do you need anything else?” Pinkie asked.

“Don’t suppose I could trouble you for a drink?”

“Sure thing!” said the candlestick, clapping her wax hands together. “Tankardjack, Rainbow Cup! We have company!”

The doors leading onto the kitchen burst open as a dessert cart came racing through down the hallway and parked next to the armchair. Sitting on the top of the tray was a metal beer tankard and a tea cup. The tankard was filled to the brim with sweet smelling cider, and had the face of a cowpony graved into the metal. The tea cup was full of nice hot tea, but the deadpanned expression on the face of the tea cup suggested that she wasn’t very happy.

“Well howdy!” greeted Tankardjack. “I hear something about a pony needing a drink? Well y’all can’t beat my apple cider! Best cider in all of Equestria!”

“Well I was hoping for something a little warmer if you don’t mind,” Magnum said, reaching for the tea cup.”

“Touch me and you’re dead,” Rainbow Cup snarled.

“”Whoa there tea cup,” gulped the stallion, pulling his hoof safely away. “I don’t want any trouble.”

“Ah, don’t mind her,” said the beer tankard. “She’s just mighty sour because she’s been a piece of chinaware for a year.”

“Oh course I’m sour! Twi can still use her magic, Pinkie has hands thingies, even Flutters can walk around like she use to!”

“Well what about me? I’m a glass too, but y’all don’t see me being cranky like a rotten apple about it.”

“Yeah well… You were always earthbound! I lost my wings! I can’t fly anymore and it sucks.”

“That’s no reason to be mean!”

“Well I don’t want him to drink out of my head anyways,” Rainbow Cup said. “It’s sounds weird and his moustache looks like it would tickle.”

“A word with you. Now,” grumbled Tankardjack, the cart rolling away so they could talk in private. “What do you think you’re doing? Do you have any idea who that is?”

“No…”

“That’s Rarity’s father!” the tankard said.

“What? Really? That’s Rarity’s dad?”

“I sure do reckon,” nodded Tankardjack. “I take it y’all never seen him before?”

“Well…no, Rare was always very secretive of her parents, embarrassed or something,” said Rainbow Cup. “I never saw him, what makes you so sure it’s him?”

“I’ve seen him a few times when I used to drop Applebloom off at Sweetie’s parent’s house. Never really talked much but I’ve seen him a couple of times.”

“Do you think that anyone else know who he is?”

“Doubt it, but I think we need to tell the big guy before he does something stupid.”

“You mean like what he did to the last pony that got lost in the Everfree?” gulped Rainbow.

Tankardjack shuddered. “Yep, I’d rather avoid another ‘incident’ to clean up.”

“So let’s go and tell him already!” said Rainbow Cup. She was just about to jump off the tea cart when the fireplace blew out.

“Uh-oh…” gulped Twiclock as the room went completely black. “He’s awake…”

“Who’s awake?” asked Magnum.

“Spike’s awake!” screamed Flutterbench, run for your lives!”

“Spike? What’s a S-s-spike?” stuttered the stallion, cowering in the lounging chair.

Rrrrrr…

“What’s that? Is that you Pinkie Stick?”

“Who are you and what are you doing in my castle?”

Magnum peeked around the chair. In the darkness was a large figure moving swiftly, like a wolf stalking its prey. He was difficult to see but his horrible green eyes cut through the darkness.

“I-I-I was attacked by timberwolves, and I lost my family! I just needed a place to stay the night!”

“A likely story… That’s what the last pony that came here said…”

“A-and what happened to him?” shuddered Magnum. He heard the sound of large pounding footsteps as whatever the beast behind him grew nearer. The stallion was terrified, frozen in place as a massive purple claw placed itself on his shoulder.

“I ATE HIM!”

The chair was thrown into a nearby wall, shattering on impact. Magnum fell to the ground within the wreckage of the chair. He slowly got up from the pile, his vision wasn’t clear, but he could have sworn he was seeing purple. “Oh my Goddess… you’re a—yo-yo-you’re a dr-dr-dr-“

“Dragon!” the purple drake roared, grabbing the pony by the throat. “You’ve come to stare at and laugh at the hideous dragon! Answer me!”

“No, I swear! I got lost in the forest please! I have a wife and two daughters!” he cried. “Please! I just wanted to save ten minutes! Please I beg of you, look into your heart!”

“I have no heart!” the dragon yelled. “It was torn out by one of your kind…”

“I’m sorry…”

“I’m sorry too… Sorry you’ll spend the rest of your miserable life in my dungeon!” he grumbled, throwing the screaming pony over his shoulder and rushing out of the resting room. In a matter of moments he had ascended the tower, and threw the pony in, locking the door behind him. The dragon started walking down the stairs of the tower and made his way to his quarters, the west wing.

He kicked the door open and slammed it shut behind him. The room he was in was a shrine to his past self and his past desires. Portraits and statues of Rarity littered the room, some were freshly painted or sculpted, others had been torn apart or destroyed in one of his fits of rage. In the corner of the room were the two things that he had ordered Twiclock to enchant, the rose he had attempted to give Rarity, and a mirror that would show him to her. He picked up the mirror and started into its silver.

“Show her to me.”

The mirror glowed with a faint purple magic before within its frame appeared Rarity. She was sitting at her work table, drawing out new designs for next season’s line up. She looked so beautiful with her red work glasses on as she carefully drew out the designs for what looked like a snowflake inspired winter dress. The dragon took the mirror and rushed over to one of his many blank portraits and picked up a paintbrush.

With the current scene to draw inspiration from, he started to paint the mare. He made sure to catch ever curve and crest in her perfect white face and perky little nose. He shaded her bouncy purple mane with only the finest of purple. When he was finished, there was a painting of Rarity working on her sewing machine. The drake smiled as he looked at another masterpiece to add to his vast collection.

“Rarity…” he smiled.

“And if you were a pony, I would have said yes in a heartbeat.”

The words echoed in his head as he felt the anger build up in his heart. The complete chaotic rage that burned deep within his belly and ensnared every positive thought he had, leaving him with only bitterness and hatred. There was a twitching in his claws as he dragged them down the freshly painted picture, tearing it to shreds. He roared and threw himself around the room, slashing and smashing everything that had the unicorn’s face on it.

Within minutes, the room was a wreck again, all his past work was now shredded pieces of paper on the floor of chunks of plaster and marble. He looked back into the mirror that he still had clutched in his claw and growled. She was still in the middle of designing a dress.

“Take her away…” he growled, the image of Rarity fading and returning to his hideous reflection. His heart dropped as a wave of depression washed over him as he looked at the beast in the mirror, the beast that was him. “Oh Rarity, what have I become?”

“I look into this mirror, and all I sees a monster

Over the years consumed by hate and greed…

Angry, bitter and cold, it’s all I seem to know

And yet my heart still beats for thee! Oh…

Rarity! Rarity!

Why would you ever say that?

Rarity! Rarity!

Did you have to be so cruel?

How could you ever love, when you’re colder than a blizzard?

Why’d I ever fall for you? Oh…

Rarity! Rarity!

Tore my beating heart out!

How’d I ever fall for you?!”

Outside the door, Pinkie Stick, Twiclock and the rest of the ponies-turned-knickknacks had gathered around, Tankardjack and Rainbow Cup had just finished explaining who their guest was.

“So that was Rarity’s father?” asked Pinkie. “That’s great! If we can get Spike to talk to him about the spell, maybe we can get Rarity to come and they can fall in love with each other!”

“Pinkie Stick, we cannot force two ponies (or in this case pony and dragon) to fall in love with each other,” explained Twiclock. “It takes time.”

“Well, we ain’t got much time left!” said Tankardjack. “We have less than a month to get that big lug to fall in love with somepony or we’ll big stuck like this forever!”

“Oh dear…” cried Flutterbench. “I don’t want to be a hoof stool for the rest of my life!”

“And I don’t want to be a stupid tea cup!” grunted Rainbow. “I just can’t believe it!”

“There he goes again, he’s locked up in the west wing

Over the year he’s changed so much it seems…”

“There’s sadness in his eyes as he tries to live a lie”

“Not confronting all of his feelings!” For…

Rarity! Rarity!

We know that he still loves her!

Rarity! Rarity!

Even though his soul is black

“He’s different right now; he used to be so caring”

“A shadow of his former self!” Oh…

Rarity! Rarity!

Can’t you see he loves you?

Shadow of his former self! (Rarity, Rarity!)

“HOW COULD YOU HAVE SAID THAT?!” (Rarity, Rarity!)

“Where do you come off at?”

Rarity! Rarity!

“Worse than any devil!

How’d I ever fall for you?”

Spike stared at the last remaining stature in his room. It was the very first one he had ever carved. Every day he spent staring at it, trying to bring himself to smash it to pieces like the rest. It wasn’t even that incredible, just a sculpture of her smiling, not doing anything remarkable yet it was his favorite.

“Do it…” he groaned. “I can’t…” he replied back to himself. “What’s the matter? Too weak? You know she hates you right? She despises everything about you, you stupid ugly lizard,” he laughed. “That’s not true!” he whimpred. “Yes it is! You’re just a beast! If she didn’t like you before, what makes you think she will now? Shut up! Make me! I am you! You’re nothing like me! Do it Spike, accept the fact that she will never love you! I won’t… I don’t want to. But you must…”

“This will be the day…”

(Come on, do it…)

“Maybe tomorrow morning…”

(You know you want to…)

(What’s the matter can’t you smash a rock?)

“My arms are weak my claws not spry, I must have some good left inside…”

(Crush her in your hands!)

“I couldn’t hurt her if I tried…”

(You’re better than she is!)

“Couldn’t we have compromised?”

(Break her till she’s little bits of dust!)

(Smash her! You putt!) “I must fight the anger deep inside my heart!”

(She’s just that no good, wicked, heartless…)

Rarity! Rarity!

(Do it) “I can’t!”

(KILL HER!)

Rarity! Rarity!

(What are you waiting for?)

(She’s just an evil minx) “Then why do I still love her?

She’ll never love the beast I am!” (Rarity! Rarity!)

“Who could love the beast I am?” (Rarity! Rarity!)

“It will never work, not as long as I am cursed

Could you love the beast… I… Am!?”

Won't you... Be our Guest?

The dragon and the pony slowly walked down the stony stairwell of the tower, the blistering cold of the up and coming snowstorm leaked through the cracks of the shattered glass windows. Rarity gave a little cough as she gingerly followed behind her captor. She had lost so much in so little time and she could barely find the energy and courage to keep moving. Keeping her head down, she could at least spare herself the view of the dragon’s backside, even if it was barely illuminated by the three-pronged candlestick he carried.

Said candlestick kept looking back at the mare and back at Spike. “You should say something,” she whispered. “Try and make her feel more comfortable.”

“Isn’t that what I’m doing?” he growled.

“Did you say something?” asked Rarity.

“Hmm?”

“I asked if you said something,” the mare repeated.

“Oh… umm,” the dragon trailed off, looking to Pinkie Stick for advice. The brass candelabra neck cricked back slightly as she mouthed the words, ‘Say something.’

“Dragon?”

“I…just wanted to hope you would like it here…” Spike finally said. Rarity however, kept perfectly silent. Feeling the need to elaborate because of the growing silence and the frantic Pinkie, he continued. “Tr-try not to think of this place as a prison, this castle is your home now. You can go wherever you want on its ground. Except…for the west wing.”

“Why can’t I go-“

“It’s forbidden!” shouted the drake, his wings flaring up as he spun around. He flexed one of his claws as it lunged terribly close to Rarity’s neck, stopping short but a few inches away.

A look of anguish and shock sprang onto her face. The blood rushed out of her face and her complexion became pale and ghostly, even more so given her fair white fur.

Spike immediately withdrew his claw. “I-I… Don’t go in the west wing.”

“O-okay,” stuttered the unicorn as she continued to follow the dragon.

They eventually reached the bottom of the tower and back to the main part of the castle. It was the first time that Rarity could get a good look at it. The bland, bleak walls of the interior were clean and free of cobwebs, surprisingly well kept for such an ancient looking palace. Frayed banners running the colour of crimson and gold hung lazily from the ceiling between the brass chandelier. It was strange. Rarity had always dreamed of living in a castle, but now that she did, just wanted nothing more than to escape.

“This is your room,” said Spike, breaking the silence as they approached a large red door at the back of the hallway.

“Oh… Okay,” nodded Rarity, still refusing to make eye contact.

“If you need anything, my servants will attend to your every need.”

Rarity said nothing as she slowly walked into her room. It was highly decorated, if not a bit overdone. The large, princess size bed was neatly made and the floor was freshly swept. The room reminded her of her old room back at her Boutique. The one she would never see again.

Pinkie Stick frowned as Rarity walked away. “You should invite her to dinner,” she whispered to Spike.

“Why should I?” he whispered back.

“It would be the gentledrakey thing to do!” she smiled.

“Fine…” Spike droned.

Rarity turned her head. “Did you say something?” she asked.

“Yeah… You’ll… You will join me for dinner.”

“I…”

“That’s not a request!” he roared, slamming the door of the bedroom.

“That…could have gone better,” mumbled Pinkie Stick.

“Shut up,” grumbled Spike, dropping the candlestick and crawling away. “Tell Tankardjack to prepare a feast. I want her impressed.”

“Sure thing…” groaned Pinkie, picking herself up from the ground and hopping in the opposite direction. “I’ll get right on it.”

Meanwhile, Rarity had listened to the events outside. The dragon wanted to…impress her?

“Why in Equestria would he want to do that?” she asked herself. “I barely even know that…that father-stealing monster!”

Tears sprang from her eyes as she collapsed onto her bed. The silk of the sheets were soft against her fur, but not even sheets woven by angels could comfort her now. She was alone, all alone in the castle of a beast.

“Please stop crying…”

Rarity’s head shot up from the tear soaked pillows. “Who said that?” she called out. “Is somepony there?”

“Down here,” the voice said again as a little hoof rest scurried out from beneath the bed.

“EEK!” shrieked the unicorn, nearly jumping out of her fur. “What sort of witchcraft is this?!”

“Oh, I’m so sorry!” Flutterbench apologized. “I didn’t mean to scare you. I was just cleaning up some dust bunnies under the bed. Please don’t hate me! But I would understand if you did…”

“Are…” Rarity tried to say. “Are you a talking hoof rest?”

“Yes,” the talking bench squeaked.

“Did that dragon do this to you?” the mare asked. “That monster!”

“Oh, no, no, no, no, no,” Flutterbench quickly sputtered. “Spike didn’t do this to us. It was…something else.”

“Spike… Is that the dragon’s name?”

“Yes,” nodded the yellow hoof stool. “And I’m sorry if he scared you. He can be a little scary sometimes…and all the time as well.”

“He’s barbaric!” said Rarity. “That…that thing is keeping me prisoner here.”

“I’m sorry…” the bench apologized once again.

“Oh sweetie,” sighed the unicorn. “It isn’t your fault. There’s probably nothing you could have done.”

“I know…but sometimes it makes ponies feel better when somepony apologizes, even if it wasn’t their fault.”

“You really are sweet… Good heavens, I don’t think I got your name, dear.”

“It’s Flutterbench… That’s what everypony calls me now,” she said.

“Did you have another name?” asked Rarity.

“My real name is Fluttershy, but Pinkie Stick thought it would be fun to change our names. I don’t really mind, really…”

“Well, I will call you whatever you prefer.”

“You can just call me Flutterbench,” she said. “I’ve gotten used to responding to it.”

“Very well, Flutterbench,” smiled Rarity. “It’s a pleasure to meet you. My name is Rarity.”

“Okay,” said Flutterbench, walking slowly over to the dresser. “So what would you like to wear for dinner tonight, Rarity?” she asked. “It’s been awhile since we used these dresses, but I think we can find something that you’ll like.”

“Dinner?”

“With Spike,” nodded the bench. “I know that Tankardjack will have something good cooked up really soon and it’s not a good idea to keep Spike waiting…” she shuddered at the thought. “No… I’ll fine something nice for you to wear.”

“That’s sweet of you, really,” the mare smiled weakly. “But I was actually thinking of not going to dinner. Being here… I’ve sort of lost my appetite.”

“What?! No!” gulped Flutterbench. “You have to attend dinner! Spike told you to do it and you can’t say no to him!”

“I can and I will,” frowned Rarity. “I’m not hungry in the slightest and being around that dragon would make me want to hurl.”

“Please…” begged Fluttershy. “You have to! If you don’t do it for him, do it for me please!”

“Why? What will he do to you?”

“Oh…umm, that’s not important,” she quickly said. “What is important is to give Spike a chance.”

“Give him a chance?!” Rarity growled. “After he imprisoned my father? After he took my life away? Why on Celestia’s green earth would I give that beast a chance?!”

Knock, knock, knock.

The light taps of the room’s door tied Rarity’s tongue. As the door slowly creaked open a small wooden clock quickly peaked through.

“Ahem,” said Twiclock. “Dinner is served everypony. Please allow me to escort our guest to the dinner hall.”

*****

Down in the main dining room, Spike, Tankardjack and Pinkie Stick were all waiting for their guest to arrive. The dragon was pacing nervously back and forth, his expression changing from stressed to angry constantly. Pinkie and Tankardjack were standing on the dining room table. The tankard cup was putting the final finishing touches on a vegetable quiche while the candlestick was hopping up and down with excitement.

“This is so exciting!” grinned Pinkie Stick, bouncing back and forth from table to table in the kitchen. “This is it, Tankardjack! The night that we finally break the curse!”

“Hold your horses there Pinkie,” said the tankard. “These things don’t just come and form overnight. It takes time, patience, and a little bit of romance.”

“But we don’t have time!” stressed Pinkie. “And we certainly don’t have patience or romance.”

“You know I’m right here!” sneered Spike.

“Sorry, big guy,” said Tankardjack. “I just want this to go right, you know?”

“Of course I know! I’m not a fool,” he said. “It’s the only thing that’s going through my head right now…”

“If we do this right we could break the spell!” clapped Pinkie Stick. “Then we can all be ponies again!”

“So it’s settled,” said Tankardjack. “Spike, you’ve got to woo Rarity off her hooves tonight.”

“No… Really?” the dragon muttered sarcastically. “It’s not that easy. I mean look at her! She’s so beautiful and I’m… I’m a monster.”

“Well, y’all certainty won’t win her over with your head in the hay!” frowned Tankardjack. “Get yer back straighter, clean those fangs.”

“Ooo! Ooo!” called Pinkie Stick. “And offer her cupcakes! Everypony loves cupcakes!”

“And be sure y’all are sincere and humble. Don’t go all self centered and pitiful on the girl.”

“And be sure to smile and shower her in complements!”

“But don’t be too talkative and bore her.”

“Don’t forget to be mysterious like a ninja spy!”

“And above all…”

“YOU MUST CONTROL YOUR TEMPER,” both household items said at the same time.

Spike was about to say something, but he was interrupted by the creaking of the door. The dragon quickly straightened himself out and tried his best to smile for his guess. He knew he had to try and make a good impression, even though his first one was terrible.

However, the only guest that appeared was Twiclock.

Spike’s strained smile drooped down. “Well? Where is she?” he asked, doing his best to sound calm, and failing to do so.

“Oh…umm, well you see Spike,” the clock laughed nervously. “She’s…not coming.”

“WHAT?!”

“Spike please calm down-“

“HOW DARE SHE REFUSE ME!” the dragon roared. “Me? Does she find it funny to keep torturing me like this?!”

“Please S-“

She didn’t get to finish. Spike jumped passed Twiclock and rushed into the hallway, reaching Rarity’s room within moments and banging hard against it.

“OPEN THIS DOOR NOW!” he demanded.

“No!” shouted Rarity from the other side. “I’m not hungry.”

“You’ll come out here this instance or I’ll… I’ll break the door down!”

“Umm, Spike…” whispered Pinkie Stick, lightly tapping against the dragon’s knee. “I don’t think that breaking the door could be seen as romantic.”

“Y’all could be a little more polite,” said Tankardjack.

“But she’s being so difficult!” gritted the drake.

“Please Spike,” begged Twiclock. “Attempt to be civil.”

“Fine…” he groaned, turning back to the door. “Would…you please accompany me…for dinner.”

“No, thank you!”

Spike pointed to the door, looking like he was seconds away from tearing something apart.

“Remember, be polite,” said Twiclock.

“It…would bring me great pleasure if you would join me for dinner,” he strained to say. “I insist.”

“No.”

“You can’t stay in there forever!” he yelled.

“Yes I can,” the mare replied.

“Fine!” the dragon roared. “Then go ahead and starve!”

“Whoa, whoa, whoa!” stuttered Pinkie Stick. “What happened to being a gentledrake?”

“If she won’t dine with me, then she won’t dine at all!” He stormed down the hall. “She hasn’t changed a bit. I try to be nice, to be courteous and she spits in my face! I should have eaten her in that tower.”

“Oh dear…” sighed Twiclock. “I suppose we better go and clean up dinner. Pinkie, I want you to stay here and stand guard. Don’t let her out of her room per Spike’s orders.”

The candlestick shot up to attention as if she were a solider in the Canterlot guard. “Eye, eye Captain Sparkle!”

“Good,” said Twiclock. “Come on Tankardjack.”

“Okay Twi,” she said as the two hopped down the hallway and towards the kitchen to clean up, leaving Pinkie all alone to guard the door.

“Well, this is boring,” droned the candlestick. “I wonder what Rarity’s doing?” she asked herself, slowly opening the door and took a peek through the crack.

Rarity was sitting on her bed, her bed buried in one of the throw pillows as Flutterbench tried to comfort her.

“Oh, try to cheer up. Please?” asked the hoof stool. “It’ll all be all right.”

“No it won’t,” moped Rarity. “How can anyone be optimistic in a place like this? And with that dragon… He’s horrible!”

“But…you two could become friends if you got to know him better,” Flutterbench. “My mother always told me to give ponies a chance.”

“But that’s the thing Flutterbench,” she said. “I don’t want be his friend. I don’t want anything to do with him!”

She continued to cry into the pillow, sobbing away in her misery. Pinkie Stick slowly closed the door, making sure not to alert them.

“Well, this is no good,” she thought t herself. “I have to fix this, but how?”

It took nearly two seconds for her to come up with a plan.

“Duh! Of course!” she yelled excitedly. “This problem can be solved the way all problems can be solved!” She smiled. “With a song! And not just any song… Oh I’m so excited…”

This…is…it, this is it,
You asked for it, here it is!
Nothing would make be happier to sing and grant your wish,
I’m so happy, I could scream!
You don’t know how much this means!
Pretty soon, I’ll be dancing,
Don’t believe me? I’ll start prancing!
I will sing, get my fill
After all, it’s Ponyville,
And a song sung here is never second best!
Get all ready, are you? To make my big début,
This is it, this is it!
This is it!

Know my marks, know my cues
Know my rhythm, yes I do,
Hearts a flutter I could jump and fly into the very air!
You’re alone, and you’re scared,
But I always come prepared,
Nopony’s gloomy or complaining,
When Pinkie Stick is entertaining!
I tell jokes! Perform tricks
It’s not hard, it’s quite a snitch!
And it’s all in great fun that you can bet!
The time has come today!
Scream hip-hip-hip hooray!
This is it, I don’t jest,
I’ll be singing be our guest!
Oh this is it, this is it, this is it!

Life, it has no meaning,
For a candlestick not singing,
No streamers, cake, or melody to call...
Ah, those good old days when I could party…
Laughing, playing, and singing all day long…
A whole year I’ve been rusting,
My vocal cord (cough!), they need dusting,
An audience, an ear to call upon…
Most days, I sit around eating cupcakes…
Flabby, fat, lazy
She come in and oopsy daisy!

Oh my gosh, oh my gosh!
Get the table spick and posh!
It reserved, but it will serve,
Tonight, as our singing spot,
Dinner theatre, staring thee,
And my dear that’s fine with me!
While the others are off cooking,
I’ll be prepping, I’ll be looking,
For a song!
Ready or not,
Goodness me, is it getting hot?
Heartbeats racing, I want the company impressed!
It’s a really great show!
The bestest song you know!
This is it!
This is it!
This is it!

This is it, this is it,
Getting at it super quick!
Been too long since anyone’s been here, and I’m obsessed,
With your song,
With your ease,
We aim to please Rarity,
As the curtains rise I’m knowing,
That the show it will start showing…

Step by step!
One by one!
Till you shout, ‘So much fun!’
Then I’ll sing you off to sleep to rest your head,
Tonight will be the best,
As I sing ‘Be Our Guest’!
This is it! This is it!
This... Is... It!

“This is it!” screamed Pinkie Stick as she pushed the doors of the room open. “This is it everypony, come on!”

“Pinkie Stick?”

“A talking candle?”

“C’mon!” she repeated. “Aren’t you guys hungry? There’s a whole meal cooked for you down stairs and no Spike in sight!”

“I umm… I suppose I am a little famished,” sighed Rarity, holding her rumbling stomach. “Maybe more than a little.”

“Perfect!” she smiled, “And while we walk to the kitchen, I can sing you guys another song. The greatest, bestest song in the whole wide world!”

“Be… our…”

Author's Note

Edited by Bunsen the Great. This song took me 3 days to get right. So STOP BUGGING ME ABOUT ASKING "OHHHH, FLIMFLAM, WHEN WILL YOU DO BE OUR GUEST? WHY HAVEN'T YOU DONE IT YET?"

WELL THIS IS IT! I hope you all loved it enough and it didn't disappoint you all.