Equestria Gets Called Out On Its Imperialism

by Deergenerate

Rating: everyone
Tags: Twilight Sparkle, Young Six, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Rainbow Dash, Comedy, Random
Length: 1268

Equestria is an incredibly imperialistic place. It takes the Student 6 a near death experience at the hands Discord to realize that.

Equestria has been doing some shady stuff for a while now. The Student 6, after nearly being killed by Discord (A conversation point for another day), are now realizing just that fact.

Like, seriously what the heck? Why does Celestia own their culture's artifacts?

Written because Season 8's Episode; A Matter of Principals sorta rubbed me the wrong way XD

Published 2020-07-30 02:50:00 UTC
Last updated 2020-07-30 02:50:00 UTC

What Do You Mean Culture Property?

After a rather lengthy shouting match with Discord, Twilight sighed and dropped onto her rump, a hoof on her forehead. He had literally sent Twilight and her friends on a death defying journey with no pay off, just so he could mess with minors?

"Ok." She suddenly said after removing her hoof. "Did anyone get hurt by Discord? Starlight told me he sicked a bug bear on you guys." She turned to see the student six, all looking battered and worse for wear. They were standing in the main hall way of the

"Bear bee almost rip Yona in half. Yona will need years worth of therapy and counseling. Yona still see it's teeth when eyes closed." Yona the Yak exclaimed standing there with a blank look on her face.

Twilight sighed. "Today has been a disaster. I am guessing the Spell-venger Hunt I planned out didn't work out either?"

"Discord made a bunch of suit of armor come to life and made a picture try to kill me. So it went about as well as things normally go for us." Gallus exclaimed sitting down with a shrug.

"Great..." Twilight once again sighed sitting down. "Spike can you gather up the artifacts for me please? I have to send them back to Celestia's vault within the hour."

Spike sighed and went about collecting the

"Wait Celestia's vault? Shouldn't they go like... back to their own races?" Sandbar exclaimed said stepping forwards.

"Uhm... No. They will be going to Celestia's Vault, cause Celestia gave them to me..." Twilight said looking at the small pony.

"Wait a second!" Smolder suddenly shouted. "You mean to tell me Ember didn't give you Knuckerbocker's shell? In fact, that thing has been lost for centuries, how did she even get it?"

"Yeah, and hold on, how the heck did you get your hooves on Grover's Crown, that thing went missing decades ago!" Gallus shouted, taking to the air and grabbing the crown out of Spike's claws holding it above his head.

"And I thought the Amulet of Aurora looked suspicious! I saw that around my aunt's neck the day she and my cousin went to help you beat the Storm King! How did you get it?" Silverstream said as she picked up the amulet and put it on, admiring it's shiny-ness.... she was easy to please.

"And Yksler is important Yak warrior! We have legendary tales about him. Even have holiday!" Yona shouted, putting the helmet on herself. It instantly fell down over her eyes, mainly due to the fact that it was a couple sizes too small for her...

Ocellus scooped the Talisman of Mirage into her hooves and held it in the air. "And this went missing over a millennia ago! Pharynx is really freaking out over this! He thinks that Chrysalis is hiding it so she can use it as a weapon to come back!"

All eyes instantly snapped onto Twilight, who stood there wide eyed. She opened and closed her mouth several times before stooping and deeply inhaling.

"I swear to Celestia, I have no idea how she got these." Twilight said putting her hooves in the air. "B-but they were all in a museam... I think. So no problem right?"

"What do you mean no problem?!" Gallus shouted taking to the air.

"W-well..." Twilight claimed, flinching back from her gryphon student. "They were in a museum, so you could visit them at any time, and Equestria isn't actually exploiting their magical abilities at all."

"Yona not mean to be stick in the mud." Yona said stepping forwards. "But ponies have advancement of magic, which makes ponies better than all other races in almost all ways. Ponies stealing the artifacts of Yaks and other races not only cruel, but also extremely vindictive, as artifacts only way non-ponies might be able to defend themselves. Equestria acting like school yard bully taking away other toys because toys make calf's just as cool as bully. Not to mention devalues culture of nation artifact taken from. Especially if they are cultural symbols of unity and leadership for creatures like crown, or magical artifact that protect and keep creature's safe, like amulet. Equestria also try to historically steal artifact that is corner stone of entire nation's culture and way of life."

"Yeah! A lot of sea ponies are still salty about you trying to steal the Pearl... hehe... get it? Salty? Cause they live under the sea? In salt water?" Silverstream said giggling to herself. She elbowed Gallus a couple times, to generate a reaction out of him, but he didn't react. Too shocked at the lengthy speech the normally rather... dense Yona gave.

Twilight was in a similar state of shock before shaking her head. She sighed. "I get your point Yona, but I can explain all of that in a rational way-"

"And isn't Equestria's most famous book series about a mare who breaks into ancient ruins and takes extremely special items? What is her name... uhhh..." Gallus started.

"Daring Do?!? It isn't like that with her! Daring Do only takes pony artifacts from ancient pony temples and ruins. She doesn't go out of her way to claim artifacts from different cultures-" Twilight started. She was quickly cut off.

There was a sudden burst of rainbow and a burst of wind. Standing in the middle of the room, was Rainbow Dash, and in her hooves, was a book.

"Oh my gosh! Oh my gosh! Oh my gosh! Twilight! I was just flying home after our run in with Discord and, oh my gosh, a new Daring Do book came out! Look!" Rainbow Dash practically screamed, shoving her book out for all to see.

On the cover was an image of Daring Do jumping head first into a massive cavern while Doctor Caballeron shook his hoof, swinging after her on a vine. At the very bottom of the cave was the Idol of Boreas, sitting in the middle of a massive creatures rib cage. The title of the book was printed on the top in Comic Sans. 'Daring Do and the Plunge for the Idol of Boreas.'

All eyes instantly snapped to Twilight, particularly Gallus's which were staring daggers at the princess. Twilight sighed for what felt like the thousandth time that day, visibly deflating under the pressure.

"Just keep the artifacts."

Author's Note

Season 8's episode; A Matter of Principals and other episodes which included the artifacts and outright said that these were cultural artifacts of all of the different races, yet they belonged to Princess Celestia really rubbed me the wrong way lol.

A note, I am not one of those people who cry; "Cultural Appropriation" every time I see a white person making tacos or some shit, but I do feel that in this case -certainly- Equestria is really being rather Imperialistic. It especially seems mean in nature running from the fact that Equestria is basically already superior compared to all these nations, there is no need for Equestria to be hoarding their artifacts too.

Yes, feel free to call me a libtard in the comments. Just know that my political ideology is so full of contradictions and odd conclusions that you will never be able to grasp my true standing! Mwuahahahahahahahah!

If this story gets blocked due to politics or whateves, so if that happens, PM me your comments I would like to read them XD

Constructive conversation only please.

Also, I really didn't put much effort into this lol. I just sorta wrote it for the sake of writing it.