T.P.K.: Total Party Katastrophe

by Jake The Army Guy

Rating: teen
Tags: Adventure, Violence, Crossover, Human, Main 6, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Dungeons and Dragons, Tirek, Spike, Comedy, Queen Chrysalis, Cozy Glow
Length: 21938

A group of idiots gets zapped from the cursed land of Barovia to the magical land of Equestria. Please roll for initiative.

Twilight Sparkle's life is about to become much more complicated. Days away from the culmination of the path she's been walking since she got her cutie mark, she's beginning to wonder what that may mean for her and her friends.

As they all try to enjoy what may be the last day they can all simply hang out together for a long time, a group of strange creatures appears out of nowhere after a magical mishap, further complicating her life. However, when the gravest threat she's ever faced rears its ugly head, Twilight learns that sometimes the only thing more useful than friends... is a party.

Alright, everyone please roll for initiative.

A love letter to the people from my Dungeons & Dragons: Curse of Strahd game which recently concluded: Captain Unstoppable, TheNumber25, Aquaman, and our lovely DM who wishes to remain anonymous. Thank you for over two years of adventure, heart, humor, and doing our best to drive the DM insane. You fucking mad lads.

Please see postmortem blog for a bit of backstory.

Published 2020-08-01 23:20:01 UTC
Last updated 2020-08-01 23:20:01 UTC

I Love This Plan! I'm Excited To Be A Part of It! Let's Do It!

Twilight let out a soft grunt as she slid the heavy basket of apples off the shelf and onto her back, then made her way to the other end of the barn. She had made it a point to not use her magic all day, lifting and moving things using her own muscle. She wanted to start getting more in touch with her earth pony nature. She was, of course, an expert at unicorn magic, and thanks to Rainbow Dash’s lessons, she was quite an adept flier these days. Given her upcoming position, she felt she needed to be as connected to all her subjects as she could.

“Thank ya kindly,” Applejack said as Twilight shrugged her shoulders and transferred the basket to the “sorting table.” The harvest had been taken, and now came the more arduous yet less exhaustive process of separating the good apples from the bad. All of her friends had come to aid the Apples, save Starlight, who was manning the desk at the school.

About halfway to the stack of baskets, Twilight slowed to a stop, and just... looked around. Applejack was, of course, working harder than anypony else, sweating like a pig in a sauna and looking like she was having the time of her life. She was loading barrels full of good apples onto a cart to be taken to market. Rarity has assumed the task of appraising the apples, using her keen eye to choose which were “lovely” or “horrid.” Pinkie was “helping” her by “taste testing” the apples for quality. Fluttershy stood at an open window on the side of the barn, negotiating with a family of squirrels to try and help out with seed planting in exchange for free room and board. And most expectedly, Rainbow Dash and Spike were not helping at all, and were instead flying circles above them, trying to see how many apples they could keep in the air between them.

The whole scene tugged at her heart just enough to send a slightly sad smile to her face. “I’m going to miss this,” she muttered to herself.

“Miss what, Twilight?” Spike said above her.

For not the first time in her life, she silently cursed his sensitive draconic hearing. “O-Oh, it’s nothing, Spike. Let’s just—”

“Wait, “ Dash said, coming to a hover in front of Twilight. “What did she say?”

“She said she was gonna miss this,” Spike said.

“Pfft! What, manual labor?!”

“No!” Twilight groaned. “I mean... this,” she said as she made a sweeping gesture with her wings. “Us! Hanging out, helping each other out, and just... having fun.”

“Geez, Twiggly Wigs!” Pinkie pronked her way towards the group. “You act like we’re never gonna be able to have fun again!”

“That’s not what I meant,” Twilight said, shaking her head. “Look, in the years since Spike and I moved to Ponyville, all of our lives have grown exponentially more complicated. And now, in three days time, I’m going to become the sole ruler of all Equestria! That’s... not going to leave a lot of time for us to just... be friends.”

There were a few sad moments of tension, but it was promptly broken when Applejack let out a few loud guffaws, crossing the distance to place a hoof on Twilight’s shoulder. “Twi, I love ya like a sister, but that’s a bunch of bull honky! Sure, all our lives are pretty durn busy these days, but that don’t mean we’re just gonna stop being friends!”

Rarity daintily cleared her throat. “I believe that both of your arguments have some validity. Applejack is very correct in as far as our complicated lives will not mean the end of our friendship.” She rolled her eyes at Applejack’s smug grin. “But,” she said, moving next to Twilight, “you are right, as well. Merely between Rainbow Dash’s Wonderbolts career and my blooming fashion empire, there are indeed going to be precious few moments where all seven of us can enjoy each other’s company at the same time.”

“And that just means that we’ll have to make sure the times we do have are all the more special,” Fluttershy said, gently nuzzling into Twilight.

Rarity let out a sweet sigh. “And besides, darling, it’s not like you’re not going to see at least one of us fairly frequently. I do spend a good amount of time at my Boutique in Canterlot, especially with Sassy Saddles’ upcoming bundle of joy.”

“Yeah,” Rainbow said, striking an epic pose in the air. “And Wonderbolts HQ is, like, a twenty minute flight away from the castle! Heh, for me, anyway.”

Spike flew up to Twilight and nudged her with his elbow. “Plus, you’ll always have your ‘most trusted Royal Advisor’ at your side,” he said, puffing out his chest.

Twilight giggled and ruffled the fins on his head. “I suppose you’re all right. I don't know. It's just... a thought that won't leave my mind, you know?"

“Hey, I got me a genuine, bonafide great idea!” Applejack said. “Big Mac and Sugar Belle will be back from their honeymoon tomorrow, and them and Bloom can help me wrap up here. So hows about we make this our one last hurrah all proper like? I say we ditch these bushels, head on over to the house, and tap into one of our secret reserve barrels of cider.”

“Wait,” Rainbow said, flying dangerously close to Applejack's face. “You mean to tell me that you have barrels of cider all year round... and you never told me?!”

Applejack let her grin grow infinitely more smug. “Family secret,” she said, and then reached up to boop Dash on the nose.

As Dash snuffled and backpedaled, the group laughed and moved towards the closed barn doors. “Yippee!” Pinkie hollered. “This is gonna be the best—uuuuAhAhAhAhAhAh...”

The groups stared in tense fascination as Pinkie’s body twisted and contorted in ways that should not be biologically possible. She jittered and tittered, jiggled and wiggled for a solid thirty seconds before it finally ceased. Pinkie gasped for air and shook her body like a dog come in from the rain.

Fluttershy took a step back. “D-Doozy?”

Pinkie pinched her nose and popped her ears. “Yeah. One troozy of a doozy!”

“Uh,” Spike said, scratching his head, “What does that even—”

All of them yelped as an impossible bright flash came from just outside, accompanied by a loud pop! The group all shared a concerned glance before running to the barn door. Instead of just barging out, however, Twilight motioned for everypony to hang back a bit. Gingerly, she eased the barn door open just a crack and peeked outside. What she saw boggled her mind.

Standing maybe ten feet away from the barn were six creatures and what seemed to be a dog, all glancing around in apparent confusion. Twilight sucked in a deep breath, immediately recognizing five of them as actual humans of all things, though they weren’t as multicolored as the humans she had seen in Sunset’s world. The sixth, however, was very clearly not human.

“Arrin, what did you do?” the non-human said. He was covered in brilliant bronze scales, so she guessed he was a dragon, but he didn’t look like any dragon she had met. He was also very big, easily almost seven feet tall, and while he wore loose robes of a bright blue, the mere broadness of his shoulders implied he was very strong.

The human with light brown skin and strangely elongated ears stumbled around in a circle, his eyes glazed over in an obvious alcoholic stupor. “Huh?” He staggered, just managing to keep himself standing. “Aw, man, this isn’t Blinsky’s shop,” he slurred.

One of the two females of the group, with pale skin and auburn colored hair, let out a sigh. “Gamliel, would you be a dear?”

The second largest of the group, a man clad in a dark grey cloak over chain mail armor that lay snug against his barrel chest, placed a hand on the drunk man’s head. It glowed a dull yellow for a moment, then the drunk man cried out and stumbled away, grabbing his head. “Ugh, I hate that!” he said. “Like having an entire hangover in the span of a second.”

“Oh, how terrible for you,” the dragon said. His voice came out in a rough growl, but his accent spoke of culture and pomp. “Now where are we?”

The now sober man spun a few circles, taking in his surroundings. “Uh... I have no idea.”

“That’s impossible,” the remaining male said in a heavily accented voice. He was the shortest and thinnest, but upon closer examination, he may not have been completely human. On both his hands and neck were patches of silvery scales, and his ears looked downright draconic. “That spell requires you to be at least aware of your destination.”

Behind her, somepony shoved Twilight, turning, she saw all her friends looking to her for direction. Taking a slow breath, Twilight eased open the barn door.

“Maybe you came here while drunk and forgot?” the final woman said, curly brown hair falling over her tan skin.

The brown skinned man slowly circled around, taking in his surroundings. With Twilight and her friends standing in the now fully open barn door, his eyes locked onto hers. “Uh, I don’t think I’d survive being drunk enough to forget them.”

The whole group spun around, and let out a collective gasp as they laid eyes on the ponies. Both Applejack and Rainbow Dash had taken up fighting stances, while Fluttershy had taken her place firmly behind Dash. Twilight watched as the dragon took a slow step forward, eyeing them curiously. “Unicorns,” he muttered.

“And pegasi,” said the tan woman.

The pale skinned man took his own measured step forward. “They don’t look like any that I’ve ever researched, though. Gamliel?” he said, turning towards the man in the cloak.

The man, Gamliel apparently, squinted as he observed them, a slight glow in his amber eyes. “They’re not celestials.”

Finally, Twilight cleared her throat and stepped forward. “Hello! My name is Princess Twilight Sparkle. Um... w-who are you?”

“Ah, royalty,” the pale man said. He took another step forward and made a broad, placating gesture with his arms. “Please forgive the sudden intrusion, your highness. We meant no offense and we bear no ill intent. Allow us to introduce ourselves! I am Selivar, a Rashemi sorcerer, and heir of Argynvostholt.” He gave a low bow, then glanced at the dragon.

The drake rolled his eyes, then looked to Twilight with a smile, showing rows of sharp fangs. “I am Brother Severax,” he said with a slight bow. “A humble Herald of the Storm.”

The cloaked man inclined his head. “Gamliel du Lac, paladin of Lathander.”

“Uh, I’m Arrin,” said the brown skinned man with an awkward wave. “I’m a bard, and uh... I play a mean lute solo.”

Selivar let out a quiet groan. “Anyway, the lovely Vistani woman next to me is Ezmerelda d’Avenir.” The tan woman gave a small salute. “And last but certainly not least, Lady Ireena Kolyana, her... travelling companion.”

As Ireena curtsied, Ezmerelda looked at her with a wry smile. "Did you hear? We're traveling companions now!"

"I suppose it's a step up from good friends," Ireena said with a wink.

“Well, it's nice to meet you all,” Twilight said. “As I said, I’m Twilight, and these are my friends: Fluttershy, Pinkie Pie, Applejack, Rarity, Rainbow Dash, and Spike.” Each pony and dragon gave a friendly nod as they were indicated, except for Dash, who kept her suspicious glare. “Now, if you’ll forgive me, you don’t look much like the humans I’ve met before. Can you tell me where you’re from, and how you got here?”

“Of course,” Selivar said. “Several minutes ago, we were all in a town called Vallaki, in the nation of Barovia. The six of us—”

“Seven,” Gamliel interjected, nodding down at the dog at his side.

Selivar groaned. “Yes, the seven of us, had gathered at the local inn to celebrate the anniversary of a... rather meaningful event for us. At one point, I made the offhand comment that I would like to visit the local toy maker before I left town. And it appears that in a moment of drunken inspiration,” he glared at Arrin, who gave a cheerful nod, “Arrin decided to cast a Teleport spell to take us there. Somehow, we ended up here instead.” He flashed a disarming smile at the group. “Now, would you be so kind as to tell us where ‘here’ is, exactly?”

“Sure thing,” Applejack said, stepping forward. “Y’all are on Sweet Apple Acres, a farm in the very heart of the nation of Equestria!”

Gamliel turned to Arrin, who choked back a laugh. “What’s so funny?”

Arrin once more giggled. “Oh, come on. Equestria? They’re horses?”

“Hey!” Rainbow Dash took to the air and hovered close to him. “We’re ponies, not horses!”

This information just made Arrin’s smile wider. “Ah, that’s even better!”

“Equestria?” Severax looked down to Selivar. “I’ve not heard of that country before.”

“Me, neither,” Ezmerelda added.

“Same,” the sorcerer said. The three spent a few moments in thought, before their eyes collectively widened.

“Oh, no,” Severax muttered.

Ezmerelda turned to Twilight with a strained smile. “Excuse me, Princess... Twilight was it?” Twilight nodded. “Ah, good. Now, this is going to sound like a very stupid question but... what is the name of this planet?”

Twilight’s eyebrow arched so high it nearly left her face. “Um... Earth?”

The motley group of newcomers all let out a collective groan. “I should have stayed in Yaedrag,” Severax muttered.

“Oh, come on,” Arrin said. “You spend all your time there! What do they have that we don’t?”

Severax shot an acidic glare to the bard. “Well, for starters, Kaldur has yet to get drunk and teleport me to another plane of existence!”

“Hey, give the kid some time...”

“Another plane of existence?” Twilight let out a quiet gasp. “You’re all from... another dimension. A different dimension than the one I traveled to!”

“That seems to be the case,” Selivar said. “Our native world is called Faerun, which rests in what we simply call The Material Plane. Do you have a name for your dimension?”

Twilight shook her head. “We have only very recently become aware of the existence of other planes. The field of study is so new we haven’t even begun the nomenclature process.”

As this unfolded, the dog at Gamliel’s feet let out a happy bark and bounded over to Fluttershy. She immediately snapped out of her timid countenance and greeted him with scrtiches and nuzzles. “Aww, aren’t you just precious! What a good boy!”

As she rubbed his belly, Gamliel knelt down beside the pair. “I see you’ve met Lancelot.”

Fluttershy stiffened, but the presence of the dog gave her a boost of confidence. “Lancelot?”

“Indeed,” Gamliel said, scratching behind the dog’s ear. “Named after a great knight of my order. He’s the very heart and soul of this little ragtag band of misfits.”

“Well, he certainly is a cutie. Yes, you are! Yes, you are!” Lancelot let out a pleased growl at all the attention. “How old is he?”

“We don’t actually know,” Gamliel said. “We found him five years ago, shortly after we all first met. The lone living thing in a house of death, and yet his tail was wagging and his spirits were high. He’s been with me ever since. Helped me through some... very dark times.”

Lancelot made several mewling cries, nuzzling into Gamliel’s hand. “Aww,” Fluttershy said. “He says he was happy to help, and he wouldn’t trade these past years for anything.”

Gamliel blinked several times. “Wait, you... you understand him? Without having to cast a spell?”

“Oh, yes,” Fluttershy said. “It’s my special talent. I can speak with my animal friends, help keep them healthy, and ensure that ponies and all the fuzzy little animals get along well!”

“I see,” Gamliel said. “Well, you are a very kind soul indeed, Miss Fluttershy.” Lancelot let out a happy bark and nuzzled Fluttershy’s leg. “Heh, I’m going to assume that was him agreeing with me.”

As the pair laughed, Rarity approached and cleared her throat. “Excuse me, kind sir, but I couldn’t help but notice the sun emblazoned on your shield,” she said, pointing a hoof at the shield on his back. “While I am not the most studious when it comes to Equestria’s Royal Guard of old, I believe paladins were a sort of ‘holy warrior,’ skilled fighters loyal to a cause or deity. So do you... worship the sun?”

Gamliel chuckled. “In... a manner of speaking. I serve Lathander, the Morning Lord, god of renewal, creativity, and the dawn. The sun represents him best, I feel. A radiant light that bathes all who are willing in soothing warmth.”

“Oh, how very poetic,” Rarity said with a titter. “If you and your compatriots are here long enough, I’d suggest you try and meet Princess Celestia. She controls the sun, after all.”

At this, Gamliel’s eyes went wide. “She... she controls the sun?”

“Indeed. And her little sister, Princess Luna, guides the moon at night.”

“Hmm,” he said, scratching his chin. “I very much would like to meet these sisters.”

Ireena was watching all of this unfold when she was suddenly assaulted by pink. “Hi! I’m Pinkie Pie!”

Letting out a brief chuckle, Ireena knelt down. “Hello, I’m Ireena.”

“So, you’re a hyuuu-mon?” Pinkie asked.

“Heh, human, yes.”

“Wow!” Pinkie said, bouncing up in the air a bit. “I’ve never met a human before, but Twilight told me about the ones she met when she went through the mirror to get her crown back from Sunset Shimmer but you don’t look like the ones she described because you’re skin colors are all so drab but not in a bad way because Twilight told us they shared the same color scheme as their pony counterparts which makes me wonder if you all have pony counterparts although I suppose it would be a dragon counterpart for Severax but then Spike became a dog when he went through the portal so maybe it would be a big dog maybe like a Mastiff or something.”

Ireena giggled as Pinkie took an absolutely huge gasp of air, but was taken aback when the pony’s bubbly, happy face suddely morphed into a deadly serious glare. “Okay then, Ireena the hoo-mon. I have only one vital, crucial, super duper pooper scooper important question for you.”

“Uh, yes?” Ireena said, now a bit nervous.

Pinkie’s glare never softened. “What... is your favorite kind of cupcake?”

“Um,” Ireena said slowly, “I’m... partial to red velvet?” She let out a slight yelp as Pinkie’s hoof shot up to her face, inexplicably holding a pristine looking red velvet cupcake. Ireena blinked several times, then shot a look up to Ezmerelda, who just shrugged. Looking back down to Pinkie, she let out an awkward chuckle and took the proffered cupcake. She simply held it for a moment, but upon seeing Pinkie’s now expectant face, Ireena sighed and took a dainty nibble.

Her eyes instantly went wide, and she tucked in for a proper bite. “Oh, my god,” she said through a mouthful. “It’s delicious!”

“Whoo-hoo!” Pinkie gave a victory pronk. “Interdimensional cupcake buddies!”

Ireena laughed and reached over to scratch behind Pinkie’s ear. “You’re adorable!”

Pinkie’s rear leg began shaking like a dog’s. “Hee-hee, you’re adorable!”

With another giggle, Ireena looked back up to Ezmerelda. “Can we keep her?!”

Severax watched all of this, quietly chuckling. Suddenly, he became aware of a tiny presence next to him. He looked down and saw the whelp standing before him. The boy barely came up to Severax’s knee, and he was gawking up at him with a sort of awe in his eyes. Severax gave a warm smile. “Hello. Spike, wasn’t it?”

“Uh, yeah,” Spike said, his eyes roaming the larger drake’s form. “Wow. I’ve never met a dragon like you before.”

“Dragonborn,” Severax corrected.

Spike blinked several times, then rolled his eyes. “Well, duh. You’re a dragon, of course you were born from one.”

“Uh, n-no,” Severax said. “I mean that’s my species. Dragonborn. Dragons are completely different.”

“No, they’re not.”

“Yes, they are!”

Spike folded his arms across his chest and huffed. “Well, you look like a dragon.”

“No, I don’t!” The deadpan look on the boy’s face would have shaken the gods themselves. “Truly! For example, dragons walk on four legs, while I only walk on two.” The look on Spike’s face didn’t shift an inch as he pointed down to his own two legs. Severax frowned. “Oh...”

“That’s strike one,” Arrin said behind him.

After shooting a glare over his shoulder towards the bard, Severax looked back down at Spike. “Well, uh... ah!” He pointed at Spike’s tail. “Dragons have tails, and I don’t!”

Spike shrugged. “I’ve met dragons without tails before.”

“Strike two...”

“Now look, I—”

“Do you breathe fire?” Spike asked.

Severax blinked several times, then gave a confident smile. “No. No, I don’t.”

Spike eyed him for a few moments, then looked past him towards Gamliel, who nodded. “It’s true. He doesn’t breathe fire.”

“There, you see?” Severax said, standing a bit straighter.

“He breathes lightning.”

“And you’re out,” Arrin chuckled.

Spike beamed. “See? By process of deduction, you are a dragon.”

Severax glared down at him. “Hey, I don’t—”

“You can’t fault the boy’s logic,” Gamliel said with a smile.

“You hush up!”

“So, if we gave you the bag of holding, would it become, like, your hoard or something?”

“Arrin, I swear to Kord, if you don’t shut up!”

Under the shade of a nearby apple tree, Ezmerelda watched this unfold with a somewhat exasperated smile. She glanced down as she saw Applejack approach. “They always like this?” the pony said.

Ezmerelda giggled. “More than I’d like to admit.”

With a light chuckle, Applejack held a hoof up to the woman. “Ezmerelda, yeah?”

“That’s right,” Ezmerelda said, shaking the offered hoof. “And you are Applejack?” The pony nodded. “So, I’m going to make an educated guess and say that you run this place,” she said, gesturing to the trees.

“Yes, ma’am,” Applejack said with a proud grin. “Sweet Apple Acres has been family owned and operated for nearly a hundred years, producing the best durn apples you ever did eat!”

“Well then, I’ll have to sample one sometime.” Applejack smiled wider and turned her back towards the tree. With a quiet grunt, she kicked the tree with one leg, and not a moment later, a fresh apple fell from the branches and into her hoof. Ezmerelda chuckled and took the apple, biting into it with a loud crunch. Her eyes went wide as the sweet crispness hit her tongue. She chewed and swallowed, then wiped some juice off her chin. “Hmm, truth in advertising.”

“Shoot, that’s nothing,” Applejack said, tipping her hat to the woman. “If’n y’all stick around long enough, my granny’ll bake you an apple pie so good it’ll make you wanna slap your momma.”

“I would like that,” Ezmerelda said, turning towards where Selivar and Twilight were talking, “Though I am not sure if we will be here long enough.”

“I just don’t understand,” Selivar muttered. “The Teleport spell isn’t powerful enough to break the planar barrier. By all rights, it would have sent us to Waterdeep before it sent us to another dimension! It just doesn’t make sense.”

“Well, you’re in luck, buddy,” Rainbow Dash said hovering next to him. “You have a magic problem, and you’re standing next to the eggiest egghead in all of Equestria!”

Twilight cleared her throat and cast a glare to Dash. “What she means is that I may be able to help. I use a teleportation spell all the time, and I also have some experience with interdimensional travel. Can you tell me about the spell?”

“Of course,” Selivar said. “It is a high level conjuration spell, designed to transport an object or up to eight people across any distance. However, it can only be used to go somewhere the caster has already been or is at the very least aware of. Also, as I said, it is not able to cross between planes of existence.”

“Hmm.” Twilight rubbed her chin. “That does sound very similar to the teleportation spell I use, though it’s not very high level, unless you want to teleport more than one pony at a time. And as for dimensional travel, I’ve used an enchanted mirror to cross the planes before. Perhaps you should come back to my castle and examine it?”

“Yes, that would be...” Selivar suddenly tensed. His head turned to face the open field on the opposite side of the barn.

“Um, Mister Selivar?” Twilight said. “Is everything okay?”

“I’m not sure,” he said as he slowly walked in that direction.

Twilight made to follow, but a bright flash of light, accompanied by the sound of a balloon deflating and a small shower of confetti made her jump more than she would like to admit.

“By the Storm, what is that thing?!” Severax cried.

Discord rolled his eyes. “Normally, I’d have a witty retort for that, but we’re a little pressed for time.” He turned to Twilight with a shaky grin. “Twilight, we have a teensy-weensy, itsy-bitsy, tiny, little, ever-so-slight world threatening crisis on our hooves that may or may not have been caused by a certain unnamed, handsome draconequus.”

“Discord, what did you do?”

“Well, you see—”

“Everybody down!”

At Selivar’s cry, Twilight instinctually threw up a shield around herself and her friends. A breath after it appeared, the barn exploded in a massive fireball. Twilight felt the shockwave even behind her force field, and even had to shy away from the heat. Fire, ash, and debris rained down for what seemed like eternity, until the dust had settled enough for her liking. She lowered the shield and looked over her friends. “Is everypony alright?!”

A chorus of vaguely affirmative groans responded. She knelt down and helped Spike back up to his feet, apparently having been knocked over by the blast. “I-I’m okay, Twilight,” he said. The pair went to the others and ensured they were not seriously injured. Aside from frayed nerves and a ringing in their ears, they seemed fine. Once they were all back on their hooves, they turned to where the barn had been. A smoking, five foot deep crater, at least ten feet wider than the building had been, was all that remained.

Applejack stood at the rim of the crater. Slowly, she turned to look at Twilight, her eyes caught somewhere between sadness and rage. “Who... w-what happened?”

“I-I don’t—”

“Twilight Sparkle!”

Twilight nearly jumped into the air at the impossibly loud scream, but as she turned to look across the field, her heart nearly stopped. Standing in the middle of the open area, looking as healthy and vital as he had at his prime, stood one of the few creatures she truly hoped to never see again.

“Surprised to see me?” Tirek sneered. He flexed his beefy arms as arcs of crimson energy danced around his dual horns. “You shouldn’t be. I told you I would return.”

Before Twilight could even truly process this, a pillar of green flame erupted right next to Tirek. “Aw, is Starlight Glimmer not here?” hissed a disturbingly familiar voice. The bale fire vanished, revealing the fallen monarch in all her vile glory. Chrysalis licked her forked tongue across her dripping fangs. “Oh, well. I suppose that means I’ll just have to hunt her down later.”

“Wait,” Rainbow Dash said, now standing next to Twilight. “Those two are working together now?!”

“Not just them!” cried the angelic voice of a young filly. A bright flash of light, and the absolute last pony Twilight could have expected hovered in the air next to Chrysalis. Cozy Glow’s trademark bubbly smile was offset by the sadistic gleam in her eyes. “Hiya, Headmare Twilight! Gosh, I haven’t seen you since you locked me in Tartarus!”

The sounds of the smoldering ruins of the barn were the only sound for several long seconds as Twilight tried desperately to analyze just what was happening. A tap on the leg tore her from her mind. “T-Twilight?” Spike clutched on to her leg like it was the last bastion of safety. “Since when did Cozy Glow have a horn?” Twilight blinked, and looked at the filly again. Sure enough, a long, fluted horn rose from her curly aquamarine mane, crackling with dark blue magical energy.

“Ah, yes,” Discord said. “I was getting to that. They... may or may not have found Grogar’s Bell.”

Twilight whirled around to glare at Discord, the growing fear painfully evident in her eyes. “G... Grogar’s Bell?!”

“Uh, who the heck is Go-Gurt?” Rainbow asked.

Tirek chuckled and rubbed at the glowing green bell affixed to his neck. “Yes, with this artifact, we have ascended beyond anything you could possibly imagine! The other Princesses, the Royal Guard, and even the Pillars have been neutralized.”

“And that just leaves you,” Cozy said, her horn sparking.

“Now, we were going to ask for your surrender,” Chrysalis said as her translucent wings fluttered in anticipation, “but truth be told? Beating you all to within an inch of your lives sounds like much more fun!”

“Prepare to—”

Whatever threat Tirek was trying to deliver ended abruptly as a multi-colored orb slammed in between the trio. On impact, the air temperature around them instantly plummeted to sub-arctic, ice crystals and snow appearing out of nowhere. All three of them hissed in pain as frost raced across their backs, the flesh turning off colors as it succumbed to the frigid air. After several moments, as the frost began to recede from their skin, they all spun around and looked up, and for one of countless moments so far that day, Twilight was stunned.

On a pair of spectral dragon wings, Selivar hovered around twenty feet in the air, eyes glowing a faint blue and a light coating of frost on his hands. “I don’t know who you are,” he said as he descended towards the tree line, where the rest of his group had lined up, “but you’re ugly. That means you’re probably the bad guys.”

“Yeah,” Arrin said. He held a lovingly cared for lute in his arms. He plucked a string, adjusting the tuning knob. “And beating the crap out of bad guys is kind of a hobby of ours.”

Beside him, Ezmerelda drew a silvered short sword and a handaxe, while Ireena produced a sturdy looking silver rapier. “I would call it more of a... vocational aptitude,” she said with a grin.

“Or a moral duty,” Gamliel growled, sliding his shield onto his left arm.

Now recovered, Tirek glowered at the newcomers. “Who are you?” he sneered.

Severax pulled a small bundle of off-white cloth tied with a golden ribbon from his robes. “Oh, just a few passers-by who do not suffer evil well. Who are you?”

The trio shared a glance, then Tirek chuckled. “Very well. You should know your betters before they destroy you. I am Lord Tirek, Conqueror of Nations.”

“Queen Chrysalis,” the changeling hissed. “Rightful ruler of the Changeling Hive!”

“Hiya, I’m Cozy Glow,” the filly said from a cherubic smile, one that quickly morphed into something much more predatory. “And I just really want to be your friend.”

Arrin leaned over to Severax. “I think I need an adult,” he whispered.

“Enough!” Tirek roared. “We are the most powerful beings in the land. You will bear witness as we defeat these pitiful ponies. We will then conquer this land, and all lands beyond! All creatures in the world will bow before us! No one can—”

An orange ball sailed in between them and exploded in a mighty fireball. All three were sent flying away from the blast. Once the flames abated, the group all turned to glare at Arrin. “What?” he said. “He wouldn’t shut up!” They let out a collective groan and marched to meet their opponents.

Tirek shook his head to clear the cobwebs from the blast. He glanced down at his barrel, covered in scorched flash and charred skin. His wounds all emitted a dull red glow as they quickly closed themselves. Tirek got back to his hooves, and saw Gamliel standing not ten feet away, glaring at him with intensely cold eyes.

“Fallen you may be,” Gamliel said, tightening the leather straps on his shield, “all living things are children of Lathander. So I will give you one chance.” He took up a fighting stance, and his right hand gripped at the hilt of a blade in his belt. “Repent. Turn from your wicked ways and accept His grace.”

Tirek blinked, then gave a cruel smile. His left hand reached up and with a sound like tearing fabric, a hole appeared in the air next to him, about a foot wide. He reached his right hand inside and grasped something. “We have already rejected, and surpassed, the most powerful magics in this realm, harmony and friendship,” he spat. As he spoke, he withdrew his hand, pulling out a large onyx sword sheathed in flames. “What use would I have for your petty god?”

At this, Gamliel sighed. "Then you are lost. I shall pray for you." He drew his hand from his belt, holding a platinum hilt with no blade. “Bono malum superate.”

Now it was Tireks turn to laugh. “This is going to be easier—” An impossibly bright flash of light forced him to cry out, turning his head and lifting an arm to shield himself. After several moments of blinking, he looked back and growled. The hilt that Gamliel held now sported a long spectral blade that seemed to be made of pure radiance. Golden light shone from it like a miniature sun. With a roar, Gamliel charged the centaur.

Across the field, Severax was facing down with Cozy Glow. His eyes were hard, but his voice was soft as he said, “I don’t know what game you’re playing at, but I urge you to give it up. I’ve no desire to harm a child.”

At this, Coazy beamed. “Golly, mister! That sure is sweet of you!” Her horn blazed to life.

Severax didn’t even have a chance to cry out as a pillar of earth erupted from the ground beside him at an angle, slamming into his side. He soared a few meters through the air, landing with a thud and rolling twice. Groaning, he slowly sat up. Across the way, Cozy was smiling as sweetly as ever, her horn crackling with magic potential. Severax stood and gripped his cloth bundle tightly in his left hand, his right drawing a warhammer from his back. He cracked his neck to the side. “Right then.”

Cozy grinned with sadistic glee as the man slowly walked towards her. He lifted his hand, muttered a word, and the holy symbol shone a bright yellow. Cozy cried out as a flame-like radiance descended from the sky and slammed into her head, her mane singing and vision filled with dark blobs. She shook her head several times, blinking hard, and looked back up just as the head of Severax’s warhammer violently smacked into her barrel, swatting her out of the air like a fly. She impacted the ground hard, but recovered just in time to see the hammer swinging at her again. With preternatural speed, she dashed out of the way, feeling the dirt kicked up from the weapon hitting the ground. She spun in the air, flared her horn, and let loose a beam of magical energy.

Severax cried out when the beam slammed into his chest, stumbling back under the force of the blow. He let out a growl and raised his hand in the air. A bolt of pure radiance formed in his palm, and with a grunt, he hurled it at the filly. She just managed to spin away, though the tips of the feathers on her wing were scorched by the attack. She gnashed her teeth, then closed her eyes for several moments, horn sparking.

The ground beneath Severax began to tremble. He leapt back just as something exploded from the dirt where he had been standing. Two large chunks of stone, each a bit larger than his head, floating in the air on either side of Cozy Glow. Her eyes opened, revealing their usual sadistic gleam as arcs of energy whittled away at the stones. In mere moments, two stone fists hung in the air, pointing at Severax.

“Huh.”

The right fist swung at his head. Severax managed to bring up his warhammer to deflect the blow, but that left him open when the left fist smashed into his gut. All the air was driven from his lungs, but he was just able to maintain the presence of mind to sink to his knees, feeling the wind as the right fist whiffed above his head. He jumped up, using his momentum to swat at the left fist, sending it flying away. Whirling around, he deftly parried the right several times, ducking and diving to avoid blows while his hammer left increasingly large cracks in the stone fist.

Severax raised his hammer high, but instead of ramming into him, the right fist trembled, more lines forming and dust falling, until it spread into an open palm. The sight left him stunned for just a hair too long as the left hand flew in from the side and batted the hammer out of his hands. Seething, Severax threw a punch at the right hand, only for it to close around his fist. The left took advantage of his surprise by grasping his other hand. They violently jerked his arms into the air then pressed down hard. Severax pushed back with his own considerable strength, grunting and growling with effort, but the magical force was simply too much. He fell to one knee with a groan.

While he struggled, Cozy Glow lazily hovered to his face, smiling sweetly like a filly asking for desert. “You know, I think I kinda like seeing you kneel before me,” she cooed, giggling at the seething rage that passed over his eyes. He leaned his head back, chest expanding as he took a deep breath. Cozy realized what was coming a fraction of a second too late. Severax thrust his head forward and roared. A wall of electrical energy struck her with the force of a freight train. She howled in pain as her tiny body, twitching and convulsing, was thrown nearly a dozen meters back. She landed in a heap, coat singed and smoking.

The stone hands fell inert to the ground, and Severax stood. He moved to retrieve his hammer, when Cozy suddenly leapt to her hooves, her face twisted in white rage. Severax gasped as her horn flared to almost painful brilliance. In a flash, he brought his arms to his chest, muttered a rapid prayer, and thrust his hands forward. A spectral shield emblazoned with a lightning bolt shimmered into existence milliseconds before Cozy let loose a terrible sustained blast of arcane energy. Severax growled under the strain, his feet sliding back several inches as the shield crackled under the force of the blast.

Nearly ten seconds later, the beam abated, and Severax let out a sharp breath, lowering his hands and letting the cracked shield vanish. He shook his head, but as soon as his vision focused, Cozy Glow disappeared in a flash of light. He scanned the area for a few moments before another blinding flash made him throw an arm to his eyes. After several hard blinks, he looked up to see no less than six immaculate copies of Cozy Glow hovering in the air around him, each grinning cruelly and lighting their horns.

Severax gulped. “Well, that's... interesting.”

Across the way, Ezmerelda was gasping for breath, a sheen of sweat already covering her forehead as she twirled, danced, and spun to avoid the spectral blade that lanced through the air. The moment she and Ireena had approached Chrysalis, the changeling summoned a pair of magical weapons and leapt at them, snarling in rage. Ezmerelda couldn’t even spare a glance to her ally, but judging by the grunts, the deep breaths, and the clashing of the magical blade against her rapier, she could guess Ireena was in the same state. Both women were deadly proficient with their weapons, but the sheer ferocity of Chrysalis’ attacks kept both of them on the defensive. Combined with dodging the random bolts of arcane energy from her horn, neither woman was even able to spare a moment to concentrate on a spell.

“You are out of your depth,” Chrysalis hissed. There was an almost feral rage in her eyes as her blades danced through the air. She grinned viciously when one of her attacks scored a hit, Ezmerelda crying out as a red gash appeared on her calf. “I was able to overpower the Solar Princess even before we found the Bell!”

Ireena dove to the side just before a green energy bolt could hit her chest. She spun and brought her rapier to bear, and actually managed to score a hit, a green wound drawn across the chitin of her right side. Instead of showing any pain, the slash only seemed to enrage Chrysalis further. “I will not be denied my birthright!” she roared as she turned her body towards her. Ireena’s rapier twisted through the air as she desperately parried the frenzied blows, each glancing strike sending out a shower of sparks.

The changeling seemed to have shifted her focus solely towards Ireena, and Ezmerelda took full advantage. With a furious grunt, she spun her body in a circle, landing direct hits with both her shortsword and the handaxe. However, once she was facing Chrysalis again, the queen’s venom-soaked eyes were locked on her. Ezmerelda just managed to bring both her weapons to her face as one of the spectral blades sliced towards her. She groaned with effort, but it wasn’t until Chrysalis grinned that she realized her misstep. Ezmerelda lunged backwards a split second before the second blade swiped through the space her stomach had just been.

Ireena cried out in rage as she swung for Chrysalis' throat, but caught nothing but air. The changeling had vanished in a puff of green flame. Ireena had just enough time to share a confused look with Ezmerelda before both women cried out in pain as a bolt of sickly green magic blasted them to the ground. Millisecond later, spectral blades were pressing against their throats. Chrysalis beamed in predatory satisfaction. “You never even—“

An earth shattering roar made Chrysalis rock on her hooves. She spun around and gasped. The biggest manticore she had even seen stood no less than twenty feet away. Ichorous venom dripped from a stinger as long as her leg, rivulets of vile drool fell from a maw that could even swallow her whole. Even at this distance, she could smell the rancid breath, and the filthy musk of the creature, and it’s aura was...

She blinked, eyes narrowing as she tried to feel its magic. A moment later, she smirked and a beam of energy lanced from her horn. The instant it hit, the “manticore” vanished into thin air, revealing a smiling Selivar standing on the ground, ephemeral wings tucked to his back. She sneered at him. “Did you truly think you could defeat me with petty illusions?”

Selivar only smiled wider. “Made you look!”

Twin beams of fire and lightning slammed into Chrysalis, sending her rocketing dozens of meters through the air, howling in pain the whole way. She landed on her side, chitin cracked and smoking from the heat of the attack. Ireena and Ezmerelda lowered their glowing hands and gave each other a high five.

“Oh, does that burn?” Selivar shouted as he took to the air. His blue eyes blazed and frost covered his hands as he waved them in a slow pattern. Above Chrysalis, dark grey clouds swirled into being, the air temperature plummeting. “Here, let me help cool you off!” With a dramatic sweeping motion, Selivar unleashed the magic built up in his hands. Chrysalis looked up just as dozens of huge hailstones, some larger than a pony, descended towards her at frightening speeds. The crunch of impact was deafening, hard chitin growing brittle and snapping from the cold and the sheer weight of the hail. Every time Chrysalis managed to struggle to her hooves, another stone struck her in the back, sending her back to the ground.

Ireena gave a tired smile as Selivar gently touched down next to her. “Thanks for the assist.”

“No problem,” he said, grinning from ear to ear. “I could tell she was bugging you!”

Ezmerelda groaned and dragged her hand across her face. “I honestly hoped he'd have outgrown that,” she muttered. When a barely restrained snort of laughter came from behind her, she turned to glare at the red-faced Ireena. “Hey, stop encouraging him!”

Elsewhere, sparks and embers danced in the air as Gamliel and Tirek traded blows. The centaur slashed downward, only for Gamliel to parry the blow with his shield, then lunge forward and scoring a deep cut along his humanoid midsection. As Gamliel pulled back, Tirek let loose a blast of energy. Gamile just barely moved his shield into place to absorb the fiery magic, but the momentary distraction allowed Tirek to slash down with his flaming sword. The paladin was only able to twist enough to ensure the strike didn’t sever his arm, but he hissed as an angry burning pain raced down his bicep.

“You are not of this realm,” Tirek snarled, his blade slicing through the air only to be deflected by the Sun Sword. Gamliel advanced a step forward, forcing Tirek to backstep to avoid a stab. “You would not be bothered by our reign.” Despite the obvious weight of the onyx sword, the demon swiped and slashed with surprising deftness, causing Gamliel to work hard to parry each blow with sword and shield. Tirek reached his fist back and swung, but hissed as his hand impacted Gamliel’s shield with a meaty smack. “Why are you fighting us?”

Gamliel advanced on the centaur. “The Morning Lord commands me to protect the innocent.” He fell to his knees, leaning back just enough to avoid a savage horizontal slash, then swung his own blade to slice across Tirek’s knees, earning him a grunt of pain from above. He leapt back to his feet and easily parried a wild downward strike with his shield. “And to punish the guilty!” he roared as he put his considerable bulk into a fierce attack.

“Ha!” Tirek brought his blade up just in time to block the blow, and then pressed himself forward. Despite Gamliel’s envious stature, the centaur towered over him, and he slowly bent backwards under the weight of the flaming blade. Tirek leaned his face closer to the paladin. “They say that faith is the refuge of the weak-minded,” he snarled.

Gamliel’s eyes blazed with anger, and the light from the Sun Sword flared in intensity. He surged forward, using all of his might to recover ground lost in the stalemate. Tirek’s brow furrowed in confusion as the paladin growled in effort, slowly pushing him back. “They also say that fiends like you flee the Light because you fear what it will unveil!”

Tirek snorted and lashed out with his foreleg. The heavy limb pounded into Gamliel’s chest, and he lost his footing, falling to the side with a grunt. “Pathetic,” Tirek sneered, and hefted his sword in both hands, ready for the killing blow.

“Hey, Bara Bait!”

Tirek blinked. He delivered another solid kick to Gamliel before turning to face his heckler. Several meters away, Arrin stood calmly, lute in hand. He smirked as he strummed out a gentle melody. “So, were you born that ugly, or did you have to, like, work at it?”

A searing pain lanced through Tirek’s mind. He cried out, grasping at his temples as he swore he could feel his head throbbing, and yet it felt like his skull was two sizes too small. He growled, shaking his head to clear the remnants of the pain, then glared at Arrin.

The bard continued his soothing song. “And you’re looking a little thick in the neck, bro. With all the juice you’re obviously on, I don’t even want to think about how small your balls must be.”

Tirek roared in pain, his rear legs collapsing out from under him as near debilitating agony washed through his mind. It felt as if a swarm of tiny fire ants had wormed their way into his skull and were biting down on his brain. Through the ringing in his ears, he glared daggers at Arrin, who still stood calmly, as if he was in no danger at all. Tirek’s horns glowed with gathering energy. “You insolent little—”

Gamliel slammed his shield into Tirek’s side with the force of a rampaging bull. The centaur was knocked prone, and before he could even try to recover, Gamliel held the Sun Sword high in the air, the blade flaring in brilliance to rival its namesake. “In nomineous Deus!” he roared as he slashed at Tirek’s exposed side. Tirek was incapable of making sound as unbearable agony ripped across his hide, searing radiance tearing and dissolving his flesh, leaving a smoking black wound across his entire barrel.

“Gams!”

At Arrin’s cry, Gamliel looked and saw a fiery orange orb in his hand. Sparing only a moment to nod, he lept backwards and knelt to the ground, interposing his shield between him and Tirek. Not a second later, a massive explosion tore through the air, though not quite loud enough to mask Tirek’s wailing cry. The flames vanished, and Gamliel peeked up and saw the centaur slowly rising to his hooves nearly a dozen meters away, his charred flesh quickly healing under a dull crimson glow.

As he regained his footing, Tirek saw Chrysalis being pushed towards him under a hail of lightning bolts and tiny magic darts. The changeling queen’s enraged growls were lost under her pained cries as Ezmerelda and Ireena kept up the assault. Finally, a ray of frigid air from Selivar broke her endurance, and the combined attacks sent her flying like a rag doll to land next to Tirek. She stood slowly, her eyes dripping hatred. A sudden girlish yelp made both villains whirl their heads around. Cozy Glow was spinning and tumbling through the air under the force of a hurricane-like gust of air emanating from Severax’s palm. She landed with a tiny grunt next to the pair. She leapt up, her normally faux innocent countenance replaced by seething anger.

The vile trio glared out as the otherworldly warriors slowly encircled them. Severax muttered a prayer into his holy symbol and held it aloft. The whole group stood a bit taller as a wave of relief washed through them. “Now then,” Severax said, “have we learned our lesson yet?”

“If not, we could always go for extra credit,” Selivar quipped.

Gamliel held his radiant blade at his side. “You will not triumph this day. Surrender, and we will show mercy.”

“Or, you could not,” Arrin said with a smile. “Not gonna lie, I’m totally willing to just keep beating the shit out of you.”

Three sets of venom soaked eyes darted around, glaring at their approaching foes. Then, in sync, all three of the villains did something that genuinely unnerved the group.

They smiled.

“Actually, we have learned our lesson,” Chrysalis purred as her horn blazed to life. “A very important one.”

“Let us share with you a little thing we learned about friendship,” Cozy said in such an innocent tone even some of the party might have believed her. Until her horn also began to glow. “Why bother with friends...”

“When slaves are much more useful,” Tirek growled, as the green bell levitated from his neck and hung in the air between the trio. All three simultaneously sent a blast of arcane energy into it, and it flared with a sickly yellow light. For several moments it vibrated so hard it seemed to be about to break, until the building energy unleashed, sending a massive wave of light into the ground.

All was still for several long seconds, until Selivar felt a slight tremor beneath his feet. Curious, he knelt down and pressed a hand against the grass, extending his arcane senses into the earth. Almost immediately, he gasped and launched himself into the air. “Get back!” The party knew better than to question the sorcerer, and they all retreated back towards the destroyed barn. Besides, they could feel it now, too: a low rumbling, as if something were working its way through the ground.

Moments later, countless plumes of soot and ash erupted from the ground like corrupted geysers. The blackened detritus billowed out into the air, but strangely, it did not spread out very far. Instead, the dark cloud just grew more and more dense, obscuring the trio’s sinister grins. Eventually, the cloud began to condense even further, and shapes began to emerge.

Some looked like ponies, others griffons, some oddly canine-looking creatures, and there were even a few minotaurs. The creatures were virtually identical aside from species, their faces blank and empty, and they were all the same dark color of ash and soot. They held a variety of bladed weapons, from daggers and swords to a few pikes and halberds that, despite being made of the same ash as their owners, all gleamed with a razor sharp edge.

By now there were countless dozens ashen constructs standing in the field. At some unseen signal, they all opened their eyes, glowing red and boring into the party.

“What... what are they?” Arrin asked.

Gamliel sniffed at the air, and immediately gagged, his face twisted in disgust. “They’re undead,” he growled.

Upon hearing this, Ireena blinked several times, then actually smiled. “Are they now? Gamliel, would you be so kind?” The paladin grasped the pendant around his neck and murmured a few words. Ireena watched as a faint glow enveloped her silvered rapier. “Thank you,” she said as she reached behind her and pulled out a tri-pronged parrying dagger.

“Now then,” Ireena said, turning to flash a flirtatious smile at Ezmerelda, “shall we dance?”

Ezmerelda chuckled and twirled her weapons around in her hands. “My dear, I thought you’d never ask.” The pair then charged towards the undead horde.

“Ugh.” Arrin rolled his eyes as he slung his lute across his back and drew a pair of curved short swords. “Those two are disgustingly adorable.”

Ireena slowed to a purposeful march as one of the canine constructs ran at her, swinging a broadsword with an otherworldly hiss. She deftly parried with her rapier, twirling the ashen weapon away. She then lunged forth and swiped her blade through its neck. A small shower of radiant sparks flew on impact, and to her surprise, a massive chunk of ash came loose. Apparently these things weren’t as sturdy as living creatures. No blood spilled from the gaping wound, just a massive cloud of ash. It let out a gurgling hiss, then collapsed. The moment it impacted the ground is dissolved into a puff of ash.

A pony construct sliced at her with what looked like a cutlass. Ireena caught the blade in her parrying dagger and flicked the weapon out of the pony’s hoof. With a grin, she tossed the dagger high into the air, reached forward, and grabbed the pony by its throat. Sparks erupted from her hand as the thing convulsed from the massive jolt. After only a few moments, it disintegrated to soot.

Ireena reached up and grabbed her dagger just as it fell back to her. However, her feeling of triumph was cut short as the scattered ash rose from the ground and coalesced. Moments later, a griffon construct holding a large axe stood before her. “Well, that’s not good,” she muttered.

A shadow passed over her, and a split second later she cried out as what felt like several claws raked across her shoulder. She stumbled forward, only just able to twist her body to avoid a spear being thrust at her by a construct. Recovering quickly, she growled and lashed out with her rapier, carving a large chunk out of the soot creature. She then turned her eyes skyward, and blanched.

Nearly a dozen constructs, pegasi and griffons, were circling overhead like wretched buzzards. One suddenly banked down and aimed its pike for Ireena’s throat. She nimbly dodged out of the way, but the pegasus simply swooped back up and began to circle around for another pass.

“Look out!”

At Ezmerelda’s shout, Ireena instinctively spun and swiped at the air. She got lucky and managed to sever the griffon’s claw, but it just banked up, turned on a dime, and took aim again. Ireena prepared her blade.

“Rrrrrraaaaggghhhh!”

A flash of blue descended from above the griffon. The construct didn’t even have time to react before Rainbow Dash, travelling downward at insane speeds, slammed her hoof into its back, driving it to the ground where it exploded in a puff of ash. She launched herself back into the air, but a pegasus was waiting for her and grappled her from the front. To Ireena’s shock, Rainbow just grinned wider. She gave a mighty flap with her wings, angling her body to spin a wide loop. She kept the momentum up, spinning faster and faster, the two bodies blurring together. Finally, Rainbow let out a roar and threw the construct to the ground at blinding speeds, where it exploded to dust.

“Aw, yeah!” Rainbow cried, sailing towards the ground. “Let’s tear these melon fudges some new turd-holes!” She landed roughly behind one of the Diamond Dogs and gripped it around the waist. With a war cry, she threw her body backwards, slamming the thing neck first into the grass. She was moving to her next target before the ash had settled.

Ireena blinked, then turned towards Ezmerelda, who was grinning widely. “This one,” Ezmerelda said, “we can keep!”

A pair of Diamond Dog constructs fell to ash as Arrin sliced his blades through the air, then whirled around. He came face to face with a minotaur swinging a large club at him. Arrin deftly spun 180 degrees to the side, avoiding the blow, then shoved a sword behind him, feeling it sink into the soft ashen belly. A pair of ponies charged at him, swinging their blades. Arrin nimbly stepped back and parried both attacks. He spun low and sliced across the first one’s face, tearing a large hunk of soot away, then twirled around and brought his other blade upwards as he stood, nearly bisecting the other.

A low, rumbling hiss behind him. Smiling, Arrin spun and brought his swords to bear, but before he could strike, a shiny green blur flew in one side of out the minotaur’s head and exploded out the other in a cloud of ash. The blur turned out to be a medium sized emerald, held aloft in a gentle blue haze. It darted back to something to his side right as Arrin heard a dramatic sigh. Turning, Rarity casually walked towards him, like she wasn’t in the middle of a hectic battle. A half-dozen small to medium sized gems spun in a lazy orbit around her.

“These were supposed to be a nice little treat for Spikey-Wikey,” she said. “Though given the circumstances, I’m sure the dear will understand.” Two pony and one Diamond Dog constructs charged at them, crimson eyes blazing. Before they got within five meters, three of the gems lanced through the air and struck them all square in the forehead, blowing their dusty brains out the back of their skulls. A griffon dashed to her side, bringing its rapier to bear. With exquisite poise, Rarity gracefully pirouetted to the side. As the griffon soard past, a large diamond shot forward towards its head.

Arrin watched in stunned silence as the gems returned to their mistress. Rarity looked at his hanging jaw and smiled. “What? It’s the modern era, darling. The ‘Damsel in Distress’ look is most unbecoming of a lady.” She gave a wink, then sashayed further into the battlefield, nimbly dancing away from incoming strikes as her array of gems raced through the air with fervent speed.

Arrin blinked, then shook his head. “Fucking tiny horses, man.”

Elsewhere, Gamliel had almost fallen into a trance of holy vengeance. He’d long lost count of how many dozens of undead constructs had charged at him, slashing and swinging wildly, but each of them met the same fate. He was a whirlwind of violence, spinning and turning, parrying and striking with almost religious zeal, his eyes blazing with righteous fury. His divine senses alerted him any time one of the disgusting creatures came close. The combination of his own skills and the radiant energy of the Sun Sword meant that none of them lasted very long once in range.

As he retracted his sword from the cloud of ash that had been a minotaur, he noted that he wasn’t sensing any incoming attacks. His eyes went wide with realization, and he whirled around with barely enough time to raise his shield as the flaming onyx blade golf-swung into him, knocking him up into the air a few inches and then prone on the ground. It was pure instinct that saved him, bringing his shield as Tirek slammed a two handed blow down. This time, however, the centaur didn’t give him a chance to recover.

Over and over again, Tirek swung his mighty sword down on the prone Gamliel with frightening speed. Gamliel’s arms burned from the strain of keeping the shield in place, an endless shower of embers falling around him. Tirek growled in near feral anger as he kept up the assault. Gamliel’s shield began to bend and warp, deforming under the strength of the massive blows. A particularly savage strike dented the metal enough to drive it into his arm, and he cried out. That momentary distraction was all Tirek needed. He changed the angle of his next strike, swinging from the side, and driving Gamliel’s arm away from his face. Roaring in triumph, the centaur reared up on his hind legs, ready to drive his forehooves deep into the paladin’s chest.

Tirek felt the tickle of something wrapping around his hoof a split-second before a mighty tug forcibly spun him around and down to the ground on his side. He shook his head, looked forward, and growled in rage. Applejack stood maybe twenty feet away, retracting her lasso and wrapping it around her hoof. Her eyes were cold and dangerous. “Y’all done blew up the wrong barn,” she spat, and then pulled her hat over her face.

There was a flash brighter than the sun itself seared and an explosion of radiant energy as Gamliel slashed his blade across Tirek’s back. The blow was strong enough to send him rolling away, roaring in pain. A large chunk of flesh was simply missing from his equine back. He struggled to his hooves, concentrating on healing his deep injuries.

Gamliel stood, his chest heaving and a small trickle of blood falling from behind his shield where the deformed metal was digging into his arm. Nevertheless, he gripped the hilt of his blade with confidence as Applejack took place next to him. He nodded down to the lasso around her leg. “You’re quite talented with that.”

Applejack looked up to him with a confident smirk. “Ditto,” she said, nodding towards the Sun Sword. The pair of them knelt down into combat poses as the enraged Tirek charged them.

A bolt of lightning lanced through the air, instantly vaporizing six constructs. Ezmerelda grinned and spun to engage the griffon charging her from her right. She ducked under it's battle axe and thrust her short sword into its belly. However, the ash had barely settled when a pony and a Diamond Dog swung at her. She jumped back to avoid the blows, but they were already swinging again by the time she found her footing. Growling, she threw up her forearm and spoke a word. Both blades bounced off a magical red barrier in a spray of sparks. Ezmerelda lunged forward and sliced across the pony's face. Before the Dog could properly recover, she lifted her leg and lashed out with a brutal kick to its chest, sending it to the ground.

Before she could even smile in victory, she paid the price for her actions. The kick had left her off balance just enough so that when a pony rammed itself into her other leg, she crashed to the ground with almost violent force. Lightning fast, the pony twisted her onto her back, straddling her on the ground. Ezmerelda sneered in defiance as it lifted its blade.

"Surprise!"

Splat!

It took a good several seconds for Ezmerelda to properly process that a banana cream pie was slowly sliding down the pony's face, but she recovered quickly enough to drive her sword through its gut. She leapt to her feet, unable to even try to think about what had just happened due to the griffon charging at her. It was too fast, she wouldn't be able to—

"Tag, you're it!"

The griffon turned is head to see what had just slapped it on its rump, but there was nothing there. Instead, it looked back to the front just in time to see a hand axe bury itself in its ashen skull. Ezmerelda removed her weapon from the crumbling construct right as something in her peripheral vision swung a broadsword at her.

"Tag, you're it!"

Again, the mindless undead tried to see its mysterious assaulter, only to be met with a blade to the throat when it turned back. A pony lunged at her.

"Tag, you're it!"

By this point, even Ezmerelda was confused almost to the point of frustration, but she decided to not argue with aid. She spun to her right, brought her hands together in a wide cup-like shape, and a blast of flame shot forth and obliterated three constructs. Once more gripping her weapon, she prepared to—

"Let's get this party started!"

The sound of a balloon deflating and an impossibly sharp gust of wind nearly knocked Ezmerelda off her feet. Quickly recovering, she whirled around and came face to face to one of the oddest things she'd ever seen. A giant pile of settling ash covered an area nearly twenty feet by twenty feet, along with what appeared to be multi-colored streamers and confetti. Standing before the colorful disaster, Pinkie Pie smiled just a hair too wide for Ezmerelda's liking as she spun a massive silver cannon to face another group of charging undead. With a decidedly less-than-sane giggle, she yanked the cord on the cannon. More confetti than should have fit inside the barrel exploded out, decimating the constructs. Pinkie then shoved the cannon into her floofy tail where it vanished completely, then merrily pronked away, humming some jaunty tune.

Ezmerelda had never felt so completely and totally confused as she did right then. A prisimatic blur appeared next to her. She turned to see Rainbow Dash, panting and sweating, covered in ash and soot with several cuts on her body. Rainbow just shrugged. "Yeah... we don't know either. Just roll with it."

Chrysalis hissed in pain as a blade made of pure ice sliced against her neck as it flew past. She dove down several meters then angled her body up to launch a blast of arcane energy at Selivar. The sorcerer banked hard, narrowly avoiding the blow. A ghostly dragon's head hovered just above him, turning and blinking in sync with his movements. It opened it's spectral maw and roared. A fierce gust of frigid air slammed into Chrysalis, crystallizing the air around her and spreading ice across her back.

With a snarl, she launched a pair of spectral blades at him, but he nimbly spun in the air, narrowly dodging the attack. He turned to her with a cheesy grin. He opened his mouth to quip, but he suddenly sensed something approaching from behind. He jerked to the side just as a pegasus construct sliced through the air next to him, Selivar thrust his hand out and a ray of frosty air surrounded the pegasus. A layer of ice consumed it and it fell to the ground.

He spun to face Chrysalis, and locked eyes with her just as a massive blast of green magic shot from her horn. He flinched away... but nothing happened. Confused, he opened his eyes and saw the beam of energy impacting a purple force field. He looked down and saw Twilight Sparkle ascending towards them.

Chrysalis also saw her coming and hissed. “I see big brother has taught you well,” she sneered.

“Yes, he has,” Twilight said right before vanishing in a flash of light. Before Chrysalis could even hope to react, Twilight reappeared directly behind her and lashed out with her hind hooves, slamming them into the back of the changeling’s head. As she cried out and spiraled downward, Twilight grinned. “That I learned from Cadance!”

Chrysalis righted herself and glared daggers at the pair above her. Her horn flared to painful brilliance as she prepared a blast. However, right before she unleashed it, Selivar snapped his fingers, and she cried out as the magic she had built up simply... vanished.

The sorcerer grinned at her as he drew a large circle in the air before him, runic symbols popping into existence within. “You need to chill out,” he cried as he thrust his palm towards the ring. A barrage of snow covered balls of ice raced through the air. However, Chrysalis erected a shield of her own and the projectiles bounced off harmlessly. Once the assault was over, she once more hissed and lit her horn. Nearly a dozen spectral blades lanced through the air at frightening speeds. Selivar just managed to dive out of the way, but his heart skipped a beat when a feminine cry of pain pierced the air. “Twilight!” He raced down to catch the alicorn, wary of the three deep cuts along her barrel.

Arrin deftly stepped away from the spear thrust at him, then smacked it with one sword, sending it sailing, while his other slashed at the minotaur’s neck, carving out a sizable chunk of soot. A sudden lance of red hot pain erupted from his shoulder, where a long sword had sliced a deep wound. Growling, he turned to face the Diamond Dog. It hissed and lunged forward to impale him, but caught only air. Arrin leapt into the air, somersaulting above the construct and twisting his body around, nimbly landing behind it. He drove both swords into its back, then violently pulled them to either side. The construct’s top half puffed away before the bottom could fall.

“You’ve gotten pretty good with those,” Ezmereda shouted as she withdrew her sword from a crumbling pony. She thrust her other hand out, and four tiny magic darts zipped through the air, connecting squarely with the foreheads of several constructs, reducing them to dust.

Arrin brought his swords up to block the blades of three minotaurs, shoving them away and spinning around to slash through them all. “Heh, you should see me julienne fries!”

“Is it—“ Ireena snarled as the ash from a griffin she just killed rose up and became two ponies. “Stop doing that!” she hissed as she engaged. “Is it bad that I kind of missed this?” she hollered over the din of battle. “The six of us, fighting side by side?”

“Very bad,” Arrin said. “And you should prob—“ he leaned back nearly parallel to the ground to avoid a battle axe swung by a pony, slicing across its neck as he righted himself— “probably seek professional help!” He lashed out his hand at a group of constructs several meters away. A crack of thunder shattered the air and they were all sent flying. He then turned to Ireena and smiled. “But I’d be right behind you in line, so... you know.”

Ireena smiled sweetly at him, but then quirked her eyebrow at something in the distance. “Huh, they’re bunching up.”

Arrin turned and saw a dozen or so undead charging at them in a tight group. He snapped his fingers and an orb of flame appeared in his hand. “Well, they’re excited.” He lobbed the orb at the group, and they were all vaporized by the fireball that followed. Arrin turned back to the girls to speak, but never got the chance. A large ashen club smashed into his chest, sending him flying.

“Arrin!” Ireena shrieked. She made to follow, but a searing pain ran through her thigh where a pony had carved a deep gash. Snarling, she turned to face it.

Severax muttered a prayer, his arms crossed before him. He opened his eyes, and his holy symbol flashed bright yellow as he threw his arms open. A pair of tiny angelic figures shimmered into existence about fifteen feet from him, flitting and dancing through the air. A pony construct rushed him, but the moment it crossed that barrier, one of the angels unleashed several beams of radiant energy, reducing it to ash.

He purposefully marched towards Cozy Glow, who just smiled that damned sickly sweet smile of hers. Nearly a dozen other constructs had charged at him, but they all met the same fate as the first, blasted to ash by the spirits around him. Finally, he was within range of Cozy, but as he moved close enough that she was within the spell, she winced and shuddered, but remained in the air. Severax glowered at her. “Lucky you,” he growled, then raised his holy symbol.

A ball of searing light shot towards Cozy, but she quickly rolled out of the way. She shot a beam from her horn, but Severax was just able to bring up his hammer in time to deflect it. He launched another bolt of radiance at her, and this time managed to hit her square in the chest. She tumbled through the air, managing to right herself just as Severax’s war hammer slammed into her side.

Cozy hissed in pain, and her home flared yet again. A translucent cloud of energy seeped into the air, eventually taking the form of a large battle axe. She snarled at him and swung.

Constructs were still trying to rush him as he and Cozy traded blows, but each time they were disintegrated by the flittering angels. Cozy Glow poised her axe to strike, but instead shot a bolt of arcane energy towards Severax’s knee. He cried out and fell to the ground, and then Cozy swung. He just barely managed to throw his hammer before him to catch the blow, but his physical strength was showing signs of fatigue, while her arcane abilities seemed limitless.

Slowly, his arms bent further and further as she pressed her attack. The sadistic glee in her eyes was now an almost animalistic blood lust. Her toothy smile only grew wider as her axe inched closer and closer to his face. So engrossed in killing him, she didn’t notice when his holy symbol flashed. Cozy licked her lips in anticipation, eager for the sound of her blade sinking into his flesh.

Wham!

Something smacked into the side of Cozy’s head hard enough to send her reeling. She shook her head and snarled as she whirled around to find her attacker, only to blink in confusion. Floating in the air was an ephemeral replica of Severax’s war hammer... only this one was less than a foot in length.

“I call it Tiny Hammer.” Cozy whirled around to see him smiling at her. “Isn’t it adorable?” He lunged forward and grabbed her foreleg. His smile melted into grim determination as bands of black and green shimmered in his eyes.

Cozy wailed in utter torment as black wounds and sores opened up all over her body, oozing blood and pus. The skin around where he held her leg with a steely grip was slowly turning black and rotting from the necromantic magic.

Suddenly, Severax’s breath caught in his throat. Burning pain erupted from the side of his abdomen. Glancing down, an ashen blade stuck out from his body. His grip on Cozy relented, and the spirits dancing around him vanished. The blade was yanked from his gut and he bellowed, nearly doubling over in pain. He turned and saw a pony construct holding a bloodied sword.

Severax snarled and lashed out his holy symbol. Flameless radiance descended on the pony, reducing it to ash. He suddenly felt the presence of something large in the air beside him. Spinning around, he had just enough time to see the calm gentleness in Cozy Glow’s eyes before the apple tree she held in her magic slammed into him.

Severax sailed through the air, probably a few dozen meters before hitting the ground, bouncing once, twice, three times before tumbling across the grass like a rag doll and coming to a violent stop. He didn’t move for several long moments, the pain simply too much to comprehend. He felt a slowly spreading pool of warmth beneath his stomach, and every breath sent agony lancing through his chest. He was pretty sure he could feel two broken ribs.

Mustering what little strength he could, Severax managed to roll over with a loud groan, nearly passing out from the pain. Slowly, he brought a trembling hand to his injured side, hissing as he touched the weeping wound under his robes. His hand flashed a dull yellow several times before he was finally able to concentrate enough to cast the spell. A modicum of relief passed through him as the wound closed itself under his holy magic, and he grunted as the two ribs knitted themselves back together.

Still in pain but deeming himself good enough to fight, he groaned as he stood. He took a single shaky step, but paused, looking across the battle before him with a sinking feeling. It wasn’t going well. Gamliel and Applejack were steadily being beaten back under the brutal weight of Tirek’s blows. In the air above them, Selivar and Twilight were frantically twisting and diving to avoid Chrysalis' merciless attacks. And back on the ground, the undead legion were respawning faster than the others could kill them. This wasn’t a fight. It was a war of attrition. One they were surely going to lose.

Severax sighed. He knew there was only one slim chance that could help them to survive. And so, despite the frantic battle before him, Severax let out a slow breath, knelt down to the ground, bowed his head, and closed his eyes.

Rainbow Dash hissed in pain as the pegasus before her scored a glancing blow with his short sword. With a growl, she pulled a lightning fast loop-de-loop, ending up behind the thing. She grabbed its head and violently yanked it to the side. She was already moving as it dissolved. The wound was but one of many—some deep, others superficial—that marred her cyan coat. Her chest heaved as she panted, but she pressed on.

She bobbed and weaved through the air, dodging the flying beasts that slashed at her. Rainbow suddenly banked hard downward, pulling herself into a steep dive. Mere meters above the ground, she flipped around and drove her knee into the spine of the griffon construct that was sneaking up behind Applejack. The farm pony retracted her rear hooves from the ash cloud that had been a minotaur, then whirled her head around at the noise. “Much obliged,” she called out as she twirled her lasso in the air several times, then launched it at a Diamond Dog several meters away. She pulled it tight to his waist, then with a loud grunt, she heaved her body to the side, yanking the construct through the air. It impacted a pair of ponies, and all three vanished to dust.

Rainbow banked up and flapped her wings, gaining as much speed as possible. She reached out her hoof and delivered a savage punch to Tirek’s jaw as she blurred by, giving a tired looking Gamliel an opening to rip a large gash across the centaur’s chest. He held the Sun Sword aloft, shouted a phrase in a language Rainbow didn’t understand, and slashed at Tirek. The explosion of sparks nearly hit her tail as she continued on.

She pumped her wings and aimed her body upwards. She delivered a savage kick to a pegasus that tried to come up behind her. A griffon lay directly in her path facing the other way. Rainbow smirked and poured on the speed. She arched her body to grab ahold of the construct’s waist, spun in a circle several times, then launched it towards Chrysalis. The changeling spun around, growling as she shot a beam of magic at it. The resultant cloud of ash obscured her vision just enough to ensure she didn’t see Twilight’s horn blazing. The alicorn released the energy, and Chrysalis cried out as she was knocked back several meters, right towards the hail of snowy projectiles Selivar lobbed at her.

Dash whirled around and dove straight towards the ground where Rarity was fending off a growing horde of undead. Right before she hit the ground, Rainbow angled her body sideways and latched onto a minotaur’s back, riding it down to the ground. She grabbed its head in her hoof and repeatedly slammed it into the grass until the body beneath her vanished. Rarity nodded her thanks. The fashionista sported numerous wounds of her own, and her normally immaculate mane was plastered to her skull. Still, she kept up her attack, using her two remaining gems to take out any nearby enemy.

Dusting herself off, Dash used a wing-assisted hop to grab the head of a Diamond Dog that was about to impale Arrin. She jerked it to the side, sending it to the ground in a puff of ash. “Thanks, paint bucket!” Arrin yelled, already turning to engage a pony rushing him. Ezmerelda and Ireena stood back to back, slicing at anything that came too close, though Ezmerelda was obviously favoring one leg, the pant leg on the other growing damp with blood.

A flash of green caught Rainbow’s attention. She launched into the air and headed back towards the tree line. When the fighting first broke out, Fluttershy had stayed back, which was probably for the best. While most constructs were focused on the main engagement, every now and then one would come for her, though they didn’t make it very far. Fluttershy was huddled beneath the tree, while Spike stood sentinel before her. As Rainbow got closer, though, she could see Spike gasping for breath, a thick sheen of sweat covering his scales.

A griffon dove from the sky towards Fluttershy, but Spike whirled around and let loose a huge gout of green flame. Several seconds later, the griffon was ash once more. The whelp then doubled over, his hands on his knees, panting heavily. Dash dove closer. “You good?!” Despite his obvious exhaustion, he looked up at her with a shaky smile, and flashed a thumbs up. “Ha! Rock on, little dude! I’m—”

“Look out!”

Fluttershy’s cry came a split second too late. Rainbow howled in pain as razor sharp claws raked through her left wing, leaving a gaping wound and ripping out a large chunk of feathers. She tumbled from the sky, landing with a thud. Groaning, she tried to take off, but the spike of white hot pain in her wing told her she wouldn’t be flying any time soon. A dark shadow passed over her. She looked up to see four constructs—a griffon, a Diamond Dog, and two ponies—standing over her, their dead, glowing eyes locked on her. She sneered defiantly as they reached for her.

“No!”

Rainbow shied away from the blistering torrent of fire that slammed into the constructs almost directly above her. The terrifying streak of green flame only seemed to build in intensity as it ate away at the undead things. After nearly ten seconds, all four creatures had disintegrated. Dash grunted in pain as Spike’s shaking, sweaty form collapsed on top of her, the only movement from the drake being the rise and fall of his chest. She lifted a hoof to pat him on the back, but even more shadows fell on them. Nearly a dozen undead stood before them. Spike’s head slowly lifted. His eyes narrowed and he took a deep breath, but only managed a dry, sputtering cough, producing a few tiny sparks and a puff of smoke. His head fell back down. “I... I-I’m sor... I... I-I c-can’t...”

Dash glared at the creatures as they reached for them. “It’s okay. You did good, kid.”

Twilight jerked her body to the side, narrowly avoiding the beam of sickly green magic. Panting, she focused hard and built up a charge in her horn and fired, but the bolt was anemic at best. The shield Chrysalis used to block it looked like it barely required her to focus. “Heh, so much for the ‘mighty alicorns,’ I suppose,” she sneered, lunging towards the breathless princess. Twilight tried to cast a teleport spell, but her reserves were so drained by this point that by the time she had built up the energy, Chrysalis was already upon her. Twilight cried out as Chrysalis shot a bolt of magic at her horn, making the spell wink out before it could even be cast.

Chrysalis wrapped her hoof around Twilight’s neck. “It’s pathetic that ponies used to think you goddesses. But now we know the truth, don’t we?” She increased the pressure of her grasp, sadistic glee in her eyes as Twilight’s face changed color and her choking gasps grew weaker. “All you are is just long lived versions of the same weak species, fit for nothing more than—”

“Oh, for the love of god, shut up!”

Chrysalis snapped her head to the side. Selivar hovered several meters away, his hands pulled to his chest, fingers forming a triangle. The area in the middle blazed a blinding blue. Twilight took advantage of the distraction, using the last of her strength to kick at Chrysalis, who grunted and lost her grip. Twilight let herself fall out of the way just as Selivar thrust his hands forward. A cone of air several hundred degrees below freezing hammered into the changeling. A thick layer of ice snaked across her, covering her entire body within seconds. Now frozen solid, she fell from the sky.

Panting, Twilight flew back up to Selivar. The sorcerer sighed. “Even Strahd didn’t talk that much!” He turned to face Twilight, but a brilliant flash of green light and a sickening hiss made him stumble in the air.

The creature that rose to their altitude was the single most... wrong thing Selivar had ever seen. The closest description he could think of was a giant, vaguely anthropomorphic spider with wings. Fangs almost as big as him dripped ichorous venom. Spindly, hairy limbs twitched and shook with growing tension. Translucent insect wings buzzed with a disturbing frequency. Countless eyes—black and dead, like doll’s eyes—focused on him and Twilight. The noise that it made as it lunged at them would haunt his nightmares for years to come.

Twilight banked hard, but not fast enough as the creature lashed out with one gangly limb, batting the alicorn out of the sky like an annoying mosquito. Selivar couldn’t even attempt to assist as the creature leaned forward to drive its hideous fangs through his body. His body momentarily turned to mist, and he slinked to the other side of the creature in the blink of an eye. He raised his arms to weave a spell, but the thing’s wretched abdomen twisted back and launched a gooey white substance at him. Thick webbing covered his torso as an acidic bite sunk into his flesh. The pain proved to be too much, and his spectral wings vanished. He dropped from the sky, but as he fell the creature slapped at him with a disgusting limb. Selivar rocketed towards the ground, accelerated by the blow. The pain from the webbing and the stun from the mighty blow made the world blur around him. Conscious thought began to flee his mind.

Moments before he hit the ground, a faint blue haze arrested his fall at least a bit. He still impacted the ground with enough force to knock the air from his lungs, but the magical resistance spared him from broken bones. Rarity gasped for air as her horn winked out, falling to her knees. As Selivar lay unmoving on the ground, Arrin crawled over to him. The elf was also exhausted and beaten, but still he leaned over his friend. “Selivar?! Wake up, bro!” When he still didn’t move, Arrin growled and placed a hand on his chest. He dug deep to the very last of his magical reserves, summoning up just enough energy to send a single jolt of healing magic into Selivar. The sorcerer gasped, and Arrin helped him up. “Come on, you Rashemi bastard, on your feet. We didn’t survive Barovia just to be killed by some fucking horses!”

Across the way, a battle was winding down, and not in a favorable way. Gamliel was panting and gasping for air, wavering on his feet. It took every ounce of strength and resolve to lift his leaden arms so he could deflect the heavy blows from Tirek. The centaur didn’t have a drop of sweat on him, a sadistic smile on his face as he relentlessly pounded on Gamliel.

Applejack was doing her best. Her trusty lasso had long been cut in twain by the demon, but the stubborn cowgirl refused to give up. She circled around Tirek as he continued to attack Gamliel, bucking into his sides as hard as she could, but it didn’t really seem to phase him. She landed a particularly hard blow on his left equine shoulder, but the only reaction she got was him taking a single moment to glare at her. “Leave us be, girl. You are no match for me.”

A fire blazed to life in Applejack’s eyes. “Oh, yeah?!” she hollered, then took off. With the deft grace of a professional rodeo performer, she bobbed and weaved in between his massive legs, emerging from under his huge body directly behind him. “Well, how do ya like these apples?!” Summoning every ounce of physical strength she could muster, and calling on her deep connection with the earth to aid her, she reared up and bucked out with her hind legs harder than she ever had before.

Tirek’s eyes went comically wide. A high-pitched, keening wail squeaked out from his mouth as he simply lost his grip on his sword and toppled to his knees. With a desperate war cry, an exhausted Gamliel lunged forward with every bit of strength he had remaining and stabbed at the demon. Tirek actually managed to roar in pain as the Sun Sword stabbed into the flesh of his equine shoulder, sinking almost half the blade into his body.

The demon fell to his side, and Applejack sprung into action, taking the longest remaining portion of her rope into her mouth. She raced around to his legs and got to work. In less than three seconds, she had tied all four of Tirek’s legs together in a tight knot. She threw her hooves up in triumph, letting out a loud whoop. She turned to Gamliel and smirked. “Ha! How’s that for a blue ribbon performance?!”

She didn’t get a verbal response. Applejack yelped as Gamliel lunged forward and threw his arms around her, turning his body away from Tirek and cradling her to his chest. Less than a second later, it happened. It wasn’t exactly an explosion, as there was no flame or heat. Rather, it was as if a massive wall of force rammed into them, and they were sent soaring through the air. As their trajectory angled down, Applejack felt the paladin jerk his body to the side, so when they finally cratered into the earth, she landed on top of him, sparing her from the direct force of the blow. Nevertheless, they bounced and tumbled several times, and she eventually fell from his firm hold. Applejack came to a rough stop with a sickening crack in her shoulder, a sharp pain lancing through her. She groaned into the grass for a moment before a white hoof took her uninjured shoulder. Rarity gently helped her to a seated position. Applejack groggily opened her eyes, and gasped.

A few meters away, Gamliel lay on his stomach, completely still save for the rise and fall of his chest. Careful of her injured shoulder, she limped her way to the fallen paladin. “Gamliel?” she said, gently shaking his shoulder. “Come on, sugar cube, say something.”

With a low grunt, Gamliel managed to lift his head and asses the situation. The entire group was surrounded by the army of undead constructs. Arrin and Selivar were wavering on their feet, but they stood nevertheless. Rarity was next to Arrin, cut and bloody, but set determination in her cerulean eyes. Ireena was on her knees, one hand pressed hard against a freely bleeding wound in her shoulder. Ezmerelda stood before her, eyes wild, as if daring any of the undead to approach. Rainbow Dash stood on shaky hooves in front of Fluttershy and Twilight was kneeling before a heavily panting Spike.

Turning back to the front, the evil trio slowly approached them. Despite the lengthy battle that left all of Gamliel’s allies nearly spent, they strode with confidence, barely even sweating. Tirek looked down at him with barely suppressed glee. “You fought valiantly,” he said. “But this battle is over. You’re finished.”

Cozy Glow batted her eyelashes at him, smiling sweetly. “If ya give up now, we might let you live.”

“Do decide quickly, though,” Chrysalis said, inspecting her hoof. “We have an entire world to enslave, after all.”

Despite the pain in his spent muscles, the overwhelming urge to simply lay down and rest, their words fanned some tiny spark in Gamliel’s mind. He gnashed his teeth and glared at them. His shaky arms moved to his sides as he tried to lift himself up. However, the strain on his muscles was too much, and he floundered, grunting out of strain. Suddenly, a fuzzy body wormed its way under his arm. Rainbow Dash looked just as exhausted and beat to hell as he felt, but she still wore a confident smirk, and her eyes blazed with defiance. She gave him a firm nod. He smiled.

With Rainbow as a pillar, he huffed as he finally stood, wavering for a moment, but quickly finding his footing. His eyes never left Tirek’s as he brought his hand to the straps that held his shield to his left arm. He gave them a violent tug, growling in pain as the deformed metal jabbed deeper into his flesh, but he held his gaze. The platinum hilt of the Sun Sword floated to his side on a purple haze. Gamliel snatched it out of the air. A look of deep focus and strain fell on his face as he grunted and growled. Finally, the Sun Sword ignited, though it seemed much dimmer than it had been. Still, the paladin’s determined eyes never left the vile centaur.

Gamliel let out a defiant roar of pain as he slammed the radiant blade against his shield, sending out a large shower of sparks. Despite his pain, his exhaustion, and his completely drained magical reserves, he looked to the trio with confidence and grit. “I...” he huffed, “I-I could do this all day.”

Chrysalis let out a dramatic sigh. “But why? Why put yourselves through such pain for no reason? You can’t defeat us.”

Behind Gamliel, Selivar was racking his brain for a solution. Despite his considerable abilities, he was reaching the end of his magical reserves, which meant the others likely were, as well. Besides that, all of them, humanoids and pony alike, were bloodied and tired. They wouldn’t last five minutes in another fight. His eyes darted back and forth, scanning for something, anything that would offer a way out... and then a glowing light behind the trio made him blink. His eyes narrowed, and then he smiled.

Then he chuckled.

Then he laughed.

At this, Chrysalis’ eyes grew cold as ice. “What? Are you truly so delusional that you think you can win?”

Selivar took a few calming breaths, collecting himself. “N-No, no. You’re right. We can’t defeat you.” He then lifted his arm to point at something behind them. “But he can.”

A distant rumble of thunder echoed over the field. A gentle breeze kicked up, carrying the scent of damp earth and ozone. The trio shared a confused glance, then looked to the clear blue sky above them, and finally turned to where Selivar was pointing.

On the other end of the field, Severax was still knelt in prayer, but a pillar of gentle white light shone down from the sky, enveloping him in a soft glow. As another peal of thunder came, this one louder, Severax slowly stood to his feet, raised his head... and opened his eyes. Gone were the icy blue pupils from before. A film of dark grey covered his eyes, roiling and swirling. He glared forward, though it almost seemed as if he was not looking at the trio, but more looking through them.

Arrin blinked, looking up at the clear sky in confusion, but a smile spread across his face as the first black clouds swirled into existence above them. “Oh-ho, this is gonna be good.”

The gentle breeze was much harsher now. Twilight had to squint in the face of the gusts, and the smell of rain permeated the air. In a matter of moments, the sky above was covered by angry black clouds that twisted and shifted with building potential. She looked up to Selivar. “What’s going on? What is he doing?”

The sorcerer just smiled down at her. “You... may want to cover your ears.”

By now, the entire sky was dominated by a seething black thunderhead, the clouds roiling and swirling, the building thunder like the snarls of an ancient beast. The wind was almost overpowering now, the thick apple trees behind the group bending and twisting under the strength of the tempest. Chrysalis decided that whatever was happening, it wasn’t good. “Kill him!” she screamed. As one, the entire undead horde turned and ran towards the cleric.

“Oh no, you don’t!” Selivar cried. He dug deep inside himself and summoned every remaining ounce of magic in his body, making large sweeping gestures with his arms. A driving torrent of icy sleet pounded the ground between the horde and Severax. As the constructs ran, they all stumbled, slipped, and fell, their hooves and feet unable to find purchase on the frozen ground. The fliers of the group were buffeted by the howling wind, falling back to the ground.

Cozy Glow watched this with fearful eyes. She gasped as the hairs of her mane separated and stood on end from the building potential in the air. Gnashing her teeth, she leaned her head back and blasted a large beam of arcane energy at Severax. Like a stream around a rock, the magical ray bent around the shaft of heavenly light, separating into two beams, deflected harmlessly into the air behind him. The trio shared a panicked look. As one, they leaned back, built an ungodly amount of magic in their horns, and unleashed it in unison. Still, much like before, their attacks merely bent around the pillar of holy energy surrounding him.

The wind had built to a blinding gale. Even the thickest trees were bending and groaning, while several smaller ones were simply ripped from the ground. The sky above was pitch black, save for the increasingly frequent flashes of light from the electrical potential in the air rapidly approaching a breaking point. Severax’s unblinking, clouded eyes never left the vile trio, as he slowly raised his arms into the air above his head.

Tirek had had enough. Deciding on the better part of valor, he turned to run, only to grunt at the firm tug on his hooves. He looked down and blanched. Inky black tentacles snaked out of the earth and enveloped their hooves, locking them in place. Across the way, Ezmerelda grinned like a predator as she twisted the fingers of her glowing hand.

Twilight had to squint under the force of the hurricane force gales whipping through the air. The loud, angry rumbling of thunder was almost constant, flashes of light illuminating the clouds like skeletal structures. Arcs of electricity danced between Severax’s fingers, and sparks and black smoke belched from his clenched maw. Finally, as the apocalyptic storm reached a fever pitch, Severax threw his arms down and let out a massive roar. A crack of thunder that was more a pressure wave than a sound slammed into the group, driving the air from their lungs.

The trio howled in complete and total agony as bolts of lightning thicker than tree trunks slammed into them, sending untold millions of volts coursing through their smoking, convulsing bodies. The crackle and hiss of the lightning was not loud enough to muffle their screams, yet the bolts did not abate. Even as their bodies began to char, the massive pillars of electricity continued to force them to shake and vibrate in anguish. It lasted so long that their screams died out, all air gone from their lungs. A wave of pure holy radiance swept through the area, and all the undead simply vanished. And all the while, Severax continued to roar as the heavenly power coursed through him.

Finally, mercifully, the lightning ceased its assault. The trio instantly fell to the ground, their charred, smoking bodies still save for the occasional muscle twitch from the residual electricity. Across the field, Severax’s head lolled to the side, and he collapsed.

All was still in the field.

As the inky clouds quickly evaporated, Discord slinked his way to the unconscious villains. “Yoink!” he shouted as he ripped the green bell from around Tirek’s neck. Placing both of his mismatched paws on the artifact, he murmured a quick spell. A torrent of green and magic leapt from the trio, syphoned back into the bell. In a matter of seconds, they were back to their original forms, Cozy’s horn gone and Tirek sickly and frail. “Now then, I’ll just—” He yelped as the bell was yanked from his grasp in a haze of purple magic. He slowly turned to see Twilight glaring daggers at him. “Heh, or... you could handle it, I suppose.”

Across the field, Gamliel, Rainbow Dash, and Spike raced towards Severax, who had just managed to struggle to his hands and knees. “Severax!” Gamliel cried, positioning himself under the cleric’s arm and helping to ease him to his feet. “Are you alright?!”

Severax gave a shaky nod, panting for breath. “Yes, I’ll... I’ll be fine.” He gingerly rubbed his forehead. “It seems that... casting a spell at that level takes it out of you... even with God’s help.”

“Okay,” Rainbow said. “What the heck was that?!”

“That, my dear,” Severax said now standing on his own, smiled down at her, “was precisely what the Scriptures described. ‘Ask, and ye shall receive’.”

Wings too exhausted to fly, Spike just stared up at Severax with what might have been pure reverence and awe. “So cool...”

The group all made their way towards the unconscious trio, where Ezmerelda knelt before them, a hand placed on the ground as she whispered a spell under her breath. A glowing blue circle appeared around the trio just as the others arrived at her side. “There,” she said, still a bit winded, and looked down at Twilight. “That should hold them for a few hours. Should give you enough time to figure out what to do with them.”

“Thank you,” Twilight said. “I’m honestly not sure what we are going to do with them. It appears not even Tartarus can hold them.”

Ezmerelda blinked. “Wait, Tartarus? Like... Hell?”

“Oh, goodness no!” Twilight blurted out, vigorously shaking her head. “Tartarus is more a prison, designed to hold creatures either too powerful or too dangerous to be held by conventional means.” She cast another glance at the trio. “And they’ve already broken out once.”

Behind them, Discord loudly cleared his throat. “Um, yes, about that...”

Twilight eyed him curiously for a moment, taking in his sheepish face. Her eyes suddenly went wide with understanding, then narrowed in anger. “You didn’t!”

“Now, now,” Discord said, holding up a placating hand, “before you get your tiara in a twist, just know that I did this with the absolute best intentions!” She didn’t respond verbally, but several strands of her mane suddenly sprung out of place. “Oh my, look at the time, gotta go, bye!”

As he vanished, Twilight took a few deep, calming breaths, promising herself to berate him later. Ezmerelda looked down at her. “He really is an asshole, isn’t he?”

“You have no idea,” she muttered, and the two turned to walk back to the group.

Severax was helping Gamliel remove his shield, gingerly undoing the leather straps. The paladin winced in pain was Severax gave a firm tug, removing the jagged piece of metal from his arm. He quickly produced a bandage and tightly wrapped the oozing wound. “Sorry,” he said, looking at Gamliel. “Best I can do for now.”

Gamliel firmly clapped him on the shoulder. “Quite alright.” He then turned to address the ponies. “You know, for being ordinary citizens, you’re all surprisingly capable warriors.”

Rarity tittered, tossing her sweaty mane aside. “Yes, well, a lady must be able to defend herself.”

Applejack stretched and flexed her hind legs. “Years of apple buckin’,” she said with a confident smirk.

“And I’m just awesome!” Rainbow declared, puffing out her chest. “Besides, it had been way too long since I kicked the crap out of some evil jerks!”

Gamliel chuckled. “Well, you all fought with valor and courage. It was an honor to walk into battle alongside you.”

“I’m still a bit shocked we won,” Spike said. “For a while there, I didn’t think we were gonna make it!”

“I never once doubted you.”

The entire group spun to see the new voice. The Celestial Sisters slowly descended from the sky, beatific smiles beaming widely, their manes billowing in the unseen wind as they always were.

“Princess Celestia!” Twilight bound over and fiercely embraced her old mentor, who draped a loving wing across her withers. “I’m so glad you’re okay! They said they had neutralized you, and I didn’t know if they had...”

“No,” Luna said. “The fiends merely bound us with magical restraints.” She scowled. “Apparently they desired an ‘audience’ for their victory. Once you defeated them, we were freed.”

“And as I said, there was no doubt in my mind,” Celestia said, bringing a hoof to Twilight’s face. “Even in our darkest hour, I knew you and your friends would succeed, just as you have since the day I met you.”

Twilight pulled away, blushing fiercely. “W-Well, we didn’t do it alone. We had a lot of help,” she looked to the haggard looking newcomers and smiled, “from some new friends.”

The entire party smiled and nodded... except for Gamliel. He was staring wide-eyed at Celestia, his jaw all but on the floor as he looked from her cutie mark to the sun emblazoned on his ruined shield. “By Lathander’s holy might,” he whispered.

Arrin looked up at Severax. “Okay, are we going to acknowledge the fact that Gamliel is falling in love with a horse?”

“I know,” Severax replied. “I’d thought if it would be anyone, it'd be you.”

Curious, Arrin looked back to Celestia, his head cocked to the side a bit. “Well, I mean she is pretty thick in the thighs, so...”

“Oh, God deliver me.”

Author's Note

Here's a fun game: Guess who played which character.

Bonus game for the nerdy: Name the domain/discipline of each character, and the spells they used.

Why yes, I AM a huge fan of the MCU! How could you tell?

You May Certainly Try!

In a booth near the back of Sugarcube Corner, the Cutie Mark Crusaders sat in rapt attention, their snacks all but forgotten as they listened to the sorcerer before them. Selivar had conjured a small illusion that floated in the air eye level to the fillies, giving visuals to his tale.

“The evil Strahd von Zarovich lay on the ground, broken and bloody, his flesh being eaten away by the radiance of the Sun Sword. He was finished! One more blow would end him! But, noble paladin that he is, Gamliel gave him one final chance to repent from his dark ways and return to the Light. The vampire lord spat in his face!”

Sweetie Belle cringed and clung tighter to Apple Bloom who, much like Scootaloo, was on the edge of her seat, staring in awe at the story unfolding before her eyes.

“And so, Gamliel held the Sun Sword high in the air, and with one final strike—“ all three fillies jumped, Sweetie crying out as the illusion vanished— “the Devil of Barovia lay dead at his feet, and with him, the curse that had befallen the land for so long. We all walked to the balcony to watch as, for the first time in centuries, beams of light fell to the earth. The dismal clouds that had hung over the land for generations finally evaporated, and once more left Barovia bathed in warm, soothing sunlight.”

All three fillies clopped their hooves, cheering and whistling, and Selivar gave a low bow. “Wow,” Scootaloo said. “That all actually happened?”

“Every word,” Selivar said with a wink.

“Awesome!”

“But, Mister Selivar,” Apple Bloom said, “where were you when this all happened?”

Selivar suddenly cleared his throat. “O-oh, well, I’m not a melee fighter, you see, so I was—“

“Laying on the ground in the hallway outside, bleeding profusely.”

Selivar cringed. As the Crusaders giggled, he slowly, glacially turned to face the grinning Ireena. “Yes, thank you... for that, Ireena.” She gave him a wink, then took another bite of cake.

After numerous healing spells, and a few rounds of a foul tasting magic restoring potion courtesy of Zecora, the group had retired to Sugarcube Corner. Princess Luna stayed behind to ensure proper incarceration for the villainous trio, while an entire company of Royal Guards escorted the cursed Bell back to Canterlot, where it could be safely contained. Now in a more relaxed environment, the people and ponies were chatting pleasantly with one another.

“So... you don’t know who your parents were either?” Spike said, looking up at Severax, who sat next to him at the table.

Severax slowly nodded. “All we know is they were part of a barbarian clan that made camp for several days in the valley beneath our abbey. Once they left, Father Rutledge went down to inspect the area and found my egg, viable... yet abandoned.” Severax noticed the boy flinch at that, but he continued his story. “He took me in, made sure I hatched properly, and then raised me as his own. My holy symbol is actually cloth from the blanket he used to swaddle me in,” he said, rubbing at the lovingly tied bundle.

“Sounds like... like a real good guy,” Spike said, though he wasn’t looking at him anymore. Severax followed his gaze, and saw Twilight Sparkle across the way, talking with Ezmerelda and Selivar.

“He was. Taught me to be kind, to love God, love my fellow man, stand up for the downtrodden, and challenge the corrupt.” Severax’s eyes grew a bit heavy, and he gave a sad smile. “We shared no blood, and yet... he was the best father I could have asked for.”

“I hear that,” Spike muttered, then tensed once he realized he said it out loud. Looking back, he saw Severax with a gently questioning gaze, as if he was curious, but didn’t want to push. Spike sighed. “Sometimes I wonder... what my life would have been like if I had been raised by my actual parents, as a proper dragon. Where would I be? Who would I be?”

Severax nodded. “I see. And?”

Spike’s face, which had been tinged with sadness, slowly began to brighten. “I start to think about the ponies who raised me. Twilight, her parents, Princess Celestia. I look at all our friends, at all we’ve accomplished, and...” he shook his head. “I don’t know, I just... can’t imagine being anywhere else.”

Severax let out a single airy chuckle, then reached down to place a hand on the boy’s shoulder. “You know, in all my travels, I’ve learned that God very rarely leads you to where you want to be, but almost always to where you need to be.”

Spike seemed to ponder this for a few moments, until he finally looked up at Severax. His sad countenance was gone, and he wore a genuine smile. The two of them just smiled at each other for a few moments, and then Spike leaned forward. “So, the other dragonborn in your village. Do they breath lightning, too?”

“Oh, no. They’re silver-scaled dragonborn.” He leaned in conspiratorially. “They breathe ice.”

“Whoa...”

On the other side of the shop, Gamliel and Arrin were speaking with Princess Celestia. “So, you... you actually control the sun?” Gamliel asked.

“Well, ‘control’ isn’t really the right way to put it,” Celstia said, tapping her chin in thought. “I merely... give the occasional nudge to keep her on track.”

“Her?”

“The sun.”

Gamliel looked like he was trying to catch every fly in the city, his mouth was hanging open so wide. “You mean that... the sun... is female?!”

Celestia nodded, but paused. “Well, I mean not technically. But that’s how she’s always referred to herself.”

An audible vibration shook the table. Gamliel leaned forward. “You...y-you talk to—”

“Down boy,” Arrin said, pushing Gamliel back down by the shoulder.

Ezmerelda sighed, sitting at a table so she could be eye level with Twilight. The two had spent the last twenty minutes trading knowledge of arcane spells, but even after Selivar had joined five minutes ago, they still had no solution to the most pertinent problem. “So... we’re really stuck here for the foreseeable future?”

Twilight solemnly nodded. “I’m so sorry. I can alter the magic in the mirror portal to attune it to your world... but it’s going to take some time.”

“Between now and then...” Selivar said, slumped in his chair.

“Well... that fucking sucks.”

Twilight giggled at the crass remark. “Are you sure you don’t know any spells that could take you back? You all seem like such adept magic users.”

“Heh, spasibo,” Selivar said, doing his best to hide his slight blush, and utterly failing due to his incredibly pale skin. “A-Anyway, Severax says he knows of a spell called Plane Shift that could do it, but it requires a specific type of metal rod that needs to be specifically attuned to the target plane. And in order to attune it, you have to be on that plane.”

“That’s... that’s utter bullshit,” Ezmerelda blurted out. When Selivar and Twilight both chuckled, she pressed on. “I mean, come on! You have to be on the plane in order to get what you need to travel to that plane?! Who the fuck writes these rules?!” The three broke down in a fit of laughter, earning them odd looks from the others around the shop.

Suddenly, Twilight gasped. “Oh! Oh, Twilight you nincompoop!” She face-hoofed, then looked up in the air. “Discord?!”

A bright flash, and Discord appeared... on the other side of the room, wearing thick foam pads and holding a chair and a whip, both pointed towards Twilight. “Yes, my dear?”

Twilight rolled her eyes. “Look, can you help them get back home? You travel across planes all the time, right?”

“Indeed I do,” he said, popping into existence beside them. “By myself. But with seven mortal beings in tow? Well, that depends. Tell me tovarisch, how would you like to reappear in your world? Original recipe or extra crispy?”

A slightly confused and more than slightly annoyed Selivar sighed. “So, that’s a no.”

“I’m very sorry,” Twilight said. “I wish I could be of more help.”

“No, no,” Selivar said, waving his hand in the air. “You’re doing your best. What I really want to know is how we got here in the first place? How in the nine hells did a simple Teleport spell zap us to an entirely different dimension?!”

“That was my doing, actually.”

Every conversation in the room ground to a halt. The new voice was powerful and clear, seeming to come from all directions. They all whirled around to find the newcomer. Standing in the corner was an unassuming looking man wearing a long red cloak. The hood over his head obscured his eyes, but his mouth was plainly visible, currently pulled into a smile somewhere between friendly and unnerving.

Gamliel and Severax stood up, Gamliel’s hand going to the hilt of his blade. “Who are you?”

The man sighed. “I know it’s cliche to say ‘I go by many names,’ but...” He shrugged.

“Then perhaps you should pick one and answer him?” Selivar said, scowling.

“Oh, come on, Selivar!” The man threw up his hands in mock frustration. “No witty banter? No pithy comebacks? No puns?! Just straight to business? You’re no fun anymore.”

“It’s been a long day,” he hissed.

“Oh, fine, fine. I am...” he tapped his chin in thought for several seconds, before snapping his fingers. “I am the winding path upon which you tread. I am the infinite sea of possibility. I am the parchment your life is written on. I am—”

“Deems, baby!” Discord lunged forward and scooped the man up in a huge bear hug, twirling him around several times. Strangely, the hood on his head never even fluttered. “It’s so good to see you. It’s been so long! Have you lost weight?”

The man shrugged the grabby draconequus off, taking a moment to straighten his cloak, then flashed a very tight-lipped smile. “Hello, Discord. Keeping your nose clean?”

“But of course!” he said, removing a large fake nose covered in mud. He then made several quick loops around the man. “But how have you been? Goodness you’re pale! I keep telling you, you need to take a break from pulling the strings on mortal lives and get out there! See the multiverse, get some sun! It’s done wonders for me!” He threw his arms open as acrid smoke rose from his charbroiled body.

“Oh,” Arrin said, standing and taking a few steps towards the man. “Oh, I see what’s going on here. So you’re like, what... fate? The force that’s been controlling us from the beginning?”

“Oh, no, no, no!” He approached Arrin, apparently indifferent to the somewhat dangerous look on the elf’s face. “I only got involved in your lives when you first arrived in Barovia! And after you killed Strahd, I moved on to... eh, other projects, we’ll say. Besides, it’s like I said, I was just the road! You were the ones holding the reigns of the cart.”

He began to walk a slow circuit around the room, making invisible eye contact with every party member. “Every decision you made over those weeks, for good or ill, were yours and yours alone. The people you let die—” He looked to Gamliel, who cringed slightly— “the lives you saved—” Severax tensed and growled as the man faced his way— “the people you have become—” He nodded to Ireena, but she actually smiled— “every action you took was yours to take, or not. You are entirely responsible for the current state of your lives.

“My only interventions came through the choices offered. I set the paths, you chose which to take. All I did was,” he turned towards Celestia, and despite his eyes being hidden he appeared to wink, “give the occasional nudge to keep you on track.” Celestia flashed a surprisingly knowing smile, and lightly inclined her head.

The room went eerily silent for a few long moments as everyone tried to process this information. The peace was broken when Gamliel strode purposefully towards the man, his heavy boot falls deafening in the quiet room. He came to a stop right in front of the cloaked man. Despite the stark difference in both height and build, the man never even flinched. A heavy tension filled the shop as everyone waited to see what the paladin would do. Finally, he did the one thing that no one expected from him.

He bowed his head in respect. “Thank you.”

After a beat, Arrin took it upon himself to give voice to what everyone was thinking. “Say what now?”

“I am redeemed in the eyes of the Morning Lord,” Gamliel said, still looking down at the man. “I have found a worthy and noble purpose to dedicate my life to. And...” he turned to scan his eyes across the other party members, “I’ve met the best friends I’ve ever had.” He once more faced the man. “None of that would have happened if I hadn’t come to Barovia. So, as I said, thank you.”

Only several scant moments later, Severax sighed. “I guess I should thank you, as well. Admittedly, I’d been rather lost and adrift for years before our... adventures,” he said with a chuckle. “And now, I have the two things I never dared dream I would have. A family... and a home.”

Across the way, Selivar maintained his scowl, though a half smirk graced his lips. “I suppose I should be grateful for the opportunity to restore Argynvost.”

“Ha!” Ezmerelda beamed at the man. “My life has become infinitely more interesting ever since I met these pricks!”

Ireena stood from her seat. “If it hadn’t been for them, I’d likely be dead. Or undead!” She looked at the rest of the party with a warm, loving gaze. “You guys... saved my life. Heh, lives, even! And even if we don’t see each other all that much anymore, you’re my best friends. My family.” She strode up to the cloaked man and stuck out her hand. “So yes, thank you.”

The man shook her hand, then everyone in the shop turned to Arrin. He still stood alone, scowling. As he felt the eyes upon him, he slumped his shoulders and sighed. “Okay, but did there have to be so many fucking spiders?!”

A round of hearty laughter spread through the group, save for one. Twilight was pondering something that this whole conversation had brought back to the forefront of her mind. Setting her shoulders, she walked up to the cloaked man. “Excuse me, sir? You said that you were the one who pulled them here?” The man nodded. “Okay, but... why?”

The man chuckled. “Well, I knew the Three Stooges were coming for you. And while I know you would have defeated them eventually, it would have been a costly battle. Plus,” he gestured to the new comers, “I had grown rather fond of those chuckleheads, and thought it would be fun to see them in action again.

“But more than that, I knew that they missed it. They’d never admit it, and they are all very content with their lives as they are now, but deep down, a small part of them longed for the days when the six of them were trekking across Barovia, fighting evil and saving lives together. And so, I killed two birds with one stone and, ‘got the band back together,’ as it were. You know...” He knelt down and placed a gentle hand on Twilight’s shoulder. “One last hurrah.”

Twilight let out a tiny gasp, and then chuckled. “I think I understand.”

“Of course you do,” he said, once more winking without his eyes. “You’re brilliant.”

As Twilight blushed, the man stood up and clapped his hands together. “Well, not that this hasn’t just been oodles of fun, but I really should get these miscreants back where they belong.” He turned to face the party. “Unless, of course, you’d like to stay a bit longer?”

“Oh-ho-ho, no,” Arrin said. “After all this shit, I’m gonna need you to teleport me somewhere I can get a stiff drink.”

“Don’t you think you’ve had enough for one day?” Ireena deadpanned.

“What do you...” His train of thought derailed as every person, pony, dragon, and everything in between glared at him. “Oh, Oh, yeah, right. Fair point.”

“Yes, and I suppose I should be getting back soon,” Severax said. “Sigrid will have my head if I don’t return when I said I would.”

“Wait, Sigrid?” Arrin scratched his head. “Dude, she’s the chief, not your mom! What’s she gonna do, kick you...” His keen elven eyes just barely picked up the faintest blush on Severax’s golden scales, and his eyes went wide. “Wait, you... you’re not...”

Severax drew himself up, straightening his shoulders under the accusing glare. “I’ll have you know that I am a very pious man!”

“... that wasn’t a denial.”

Severax blinked, then looked up to the sky. “Huh. No, I suppose it wasn’t.” As he walked past Arrin, the very extreme corner of his mouth lifted just a hair.

Arrin let out an exasperated sigh and rubbed the back of his head. “Fucking hound derg.”

Twilight and her friends approached the party. “Well,” Twilight said, “I suppose this is goodbye.”

“For now, at least,” Selivar said. He chuckled at Twilight’s confusion. “Well, I mean if I can figure out how to safely travel here without getting Arrin stone drunk—”

“Yo!”

“—I would very much like to return sometime. I would love to do further study on your schools of magic.”

Twilight beamed. “Well, the Canterlot Royal Archives are open to you whenever you may return.”

“I second that!” Applejack said, doffing her hat and holding it to her chest. “If y’all ever find yourselves ‘round these parts again, the doors of Sweet Apple Acres are open twenty-four seven!”

Gamliel laughed heartily, scanning his eyes across the strange ponies who had impressed him so. “You are all kind, radiant souls, and fierce warriors. Hold tight to that, and the Morning Lord will always watch over you.” He looked to where Fluttershy was still playing with Lancelot. “Miss Fluttershy, I’m going to need that back.”

Fluttershy flushed hot, and scratched behind the dog’s ear. “Now, you be sure to take good care of them, alright? They seem like they need a little unconditional love.” Lancelot barked happily and gave one final lick to her face before bounding over to take his place at Gamliel’s side.

“So,” Pinkie said in a very business-like tone of voice, “you have to soften the butter before you add it to the batter, and do not forget the sour cream! That is the key secret ingredient to make red velvet into red silk!”

Ireena knelt beside her, frantically scribbling on a scroll. “Soften... butter... sour... cream, got it!” She tucked the scroll into her side pack, then looked back to Pinkie with sad eyes. “I’m going to miss you.”

Pinkie’s eyes watered to an almost comical degree, then she lunged forward, enveloping Ireena in a bone-crushing hug, which the woman gladly reciprocated. “Aww, I’m going to miss you, tooOOooOOooOOooOO—”

“Ireena.”

The woman reluctantly pulled away from the cotton candy hug and turned to look at Ezmerelda, who glanced back with an expectant, borderline impatient gaze. Ireena rolled her eyes and turned back to Pinkie. “Ugh. Sorry, mom says I have to go.”

Pinkie giggled uncontrollably as Ireena took her place next to Ezmerelda. They stood there for a few seconds before Ezmerelda leaned over to Ireena’s ear. “So...” she whispered, “I’m mommy now, am I?”

Ireena’s face immediately flushed deep crimson, and she sputtered several times. “There are children present,” she hissed.

Severax chuckled at these antics, then faced back to the ponies. He held his arms out and bowed his head, as if giving a benediction. “May the Tides favor your every journey.”

The last member of the group still among the ponies, Arrin awkwardly walked backwards towards his friends. “Uh, I’m no good with speeches. You all... stay awesome.”

“Heh, it’s impossible for me not to,” boasted Rainbow Dash.

Arrin raised a finger in the air, jabbing it in her direction several times. “Still can’t decide if I like you or think you’re a bitch.”

Rainbow smirked and arched an eyebrow. “Why can’t it be both?”

“Aaaaand, there it is.”

Finally, the entire party stood in a semi-circle around the cloaked man. He gave them all a nod, then turned to face the ponies. “Well, it’s been real, it’s been fun, but... oh, who the hell am I kidding? It’s been real fun!” He lifted his hand into the air, preparing to snap his fingers, but paused. The man turned towards Celestia. “Oh, and Tia?” He flashed what may have been a flirtatious smirk. “Same time, same place?”

Princess Celestia tittered, and gave her own borderline saucy smile. “But of course.”

“Wait,” Selivar said. “What was—”

And then they were gone.

A comfortable silence descended upon the group. They were all trying to process the events of the day, the implications of everything that they had learned, and what, if anything, it meant for their future. Twilight tensed when she felt a hoof on her shoulder. She turned to see Rarity smiling gently at her. “Twilight? Are you alright?”

Twilight’s brow furrowed as she truly thought about the situation. The fierce battle. Her upcoming coronation. The road ahead. Finally, she smiled. “Yeah, Rarity. I think... I think I really am. I get it—”

“Alright, alright! Enough of this sappy crap,” Rainbow Dash said, flying dangerously close to Applejack. “I believe somepony promised me cider!”

Applejack groaned and stared at the pegasus. “Filly, you got a one-track mind!”

“Yeah, but it’s an awesome track!”

As Applejack and Rainbow Dash bickered, much like they had been doing for all the years she had known them, Twilight let out an amused sigh and followed them out the door. She didn’t know for absolute certain, but she had a pretty good feeling that everything was going to be just fine.

Author's Note