The Magicless Adventures of Anon

You are Twilight sparkle, well Princess Twilight sparkle now. You are still getting used to everypony calling you that. Even if you are now more used to flying.

While going over some paperwork about a town-pony's “friendship problem” which is actually a foal complaining about the lack of interest in their new hobby by their classmates, you hear an all too familiar boyish scream.

Did Spike drop a dish again? While contemplating if you should go help clean up, you hear a second scream, “M-MONSTER!?!?!!”. It takes a second but it finally clicks. You activate a defensive spell and teleport to Spike by tracking his magical signature.

“What’s wro..?”, You pause after seeing… it?

It stands taller than Celestia if you don’t count her horn, has green skin, green eyes, bipedal, no fur say for only a small tuft on the chest, forelimbs, legs, and genitals… why does it have an erection?!? You now see a cowering Spike and a confused Zecora standing in front of it.

You charge up a binding spell and fire it at the monster… just as it says, “Hello, please don’t be…” the magic hits it.

After the abject horror of what transpired finishes sinking in, you see that your spell had no effect. Must have miss fired.

“… afraid?”, the monster seems confused. “What was that?”

“Sorry, I heard a yell, and Spike was upset, and, and I'mSorryITriedToBlastYou!” you realize that you just yelled that last part. Stupid! Ok, breath in, now out… better.

“I’m fine?” the monster says as it pats its chest as if looking for damages.

After calming down, you realize that the spell passed directly through the monster and wrapped around the branch of a tree behind it.

“O-one second. Zecora, a word please?” You say while trying to remain calm.

Zecora raises an eyebrow at the question, yet still trots after you through the door.

You realize that you just left Spike with the monster, but have no time to go back, and the Monster? seems to not be mad.

You cast a sound blocking bubble spell. Before starting to ask your friend, “What the Hay is that?!? A-and why does it have an…?” your voice trails off.

“I do not know, why he is always erect so” Zecora replies. “I offered to help release his pent-up desire, though he declined, much to my ire.” After a few seconds you can feel your face warming with blood from a blush.

“W-well, I suppose it may always be like that?” you hypothesis out loud.” Still, why bring it here Zecora?”

“Hmm, when I met him, I saved him on a whim. But now he is a friend in need, and a friend in need…”

“Is a friend, indeed.” Zecora smiled as you finished the line you had taught her. Clever mare…

you look at the monster and he looks back at you with his emerald pupils while tilting his head and flat snout to make an odd smile. Then he went back to apologizing to Spike for scaring him.

“Ok, if he is a friend of yours, he will be a friend of mine.” You almost sigh out the last of your sentence.

-You are Anon-
After the purple pony princess is done talking to Zecora and you finished performing your best 'I am no threat, don’t behead me' face; they finally walk over as you finish apologizing to the small purple dinosaur kid you recently met for the unintentional scare.

“Sorry again about before. My name is Twilight Sparkle. It is a pleasure to meet you.” The purple alicorn states with a slight curtsy with her wings.

“Yeah, no problem. My name’s Anon. Sorry for scaring your friend. It’s nice to meet you too.” Well, at least when you’re not shooting sparkling beams at me, you think to yourself.

“It looks like you will have a lot to say, yet I have a lot I must do today.” Zecora informed as she started to trot off. “Do not fret, I will be back by night I hazard to bet.”

“O-ok, Be safe Zecora.” Although you are a bit apprehensive about being left alone with creatures you just met. If they are Zecora's friends, they should be fine, right?