Not Her Fault

by Somber Concerto

Rating: teen
Tags: Twilight Sparkle, Profanity, Slice of Life, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Sad, Drama, Suicide / Self Harm, Cozy Glow
Length: 1748

Cozy Glow's mother, Hot Coca, tells the story of Cozy Glow from her point of view.

Cozy Glows mother, Hot Coca, tell the world who's fault it really was and Cozy Glows actions from her point of view.

Published 2021-05-08 16:40:01 UTC
Last updated 2021-08-14 23:13:04 UTC

Chapter 2

Okay, okay. Sorry, I umm... got a little emotional back there. I- I'm fine now though. Where was I? Oh, I'll just start from the beginning.

When Cozy was just five, I was going through some hard times. Mine and Blue Light's relationship was falling apart, and it drove me to do things... I'm not proud of. What? Oh, yeah, Blue was my husband. My name? I'm Hot Coca. Anyway, at first it was just a beer or two when it had been a long night. Then it was more like 3 or 4 every week. Then every other day. And, well, you get the point. We of course didn't say anything about it too Cozy. She was just so young.

Well, one day I got in an argument with Blue Light, about something stupid, like weather or not we should sign Cozy up for any sports. Thinking back, we should have just asked her. She may have been little, but she had ideas and opinions about EVERYTHING. One morning I woke up a little late to see her sitting in this little wooden rocking chair of hers. She had stolen two of my period pads and stuck them on the arms. When I confronted her she simply said; "Awm wests!" I wanted to be mad, but I just couldn't. That was so damn cute.

Where was I? Oh sorry, I tend to ramble. I'll try not to do that. So, anyway, me and Blue started yelling back and forth. I went over to the fridge and opened a can of beer. And I just kept downing them. One after another. I guess I thought if I just kept drinking, it would drown the world out. After a few hours, I was so drunk I could hardly stand straight. And Blue just wouldn't shut up, and I... Oh sweet Celectia I... I raised my hoof and I... I hit him. I hit him so hard I heard the smack. I knocked him backwards onto the bed. I... I didn't mean to. I don't know how I even... I just. I just did. I turned my head down and emptied the contents of my stomach, appalled by what I had just done. Even drunk I knew it was wrong!

He knew I felt horrid. I apologized over and over, and he just kept saying "It's okay, It's okay!" But, it wasn't okay. He said it was an accident. But that was a lie. That was my hoof. Mine only. I am the only pony in control of it. And I am the one who... hurt another pony.

For the rest of the week I felt horrid. I was just so depressed and appalled by myself. Couldn't sleep much. Hardly ate. That night, Blue had taken Cozy to one of her classmate's birthday party. I... I don't know what compelled me to do it. It just... felt right. I saw the knife in the kitchen. So sharp. So shiny. It just... called to me. I slowly trotted over it, my cheeks wet with silent tears. I grabbed the handle with my mouth and I... I lifted my foreleg. So... smooth and perfect. Even unbroken chocolate brown fur. It just... felt like the right thing to do.

Without thinking further, gently put the blade up against my skin. And then I pressed down on it. It stung. It stung unlike anything else I had felt before. I was strong though. I could handle it. Tears began to form in my eyes, so I deepened the cut. Punishment for showing weakness. I cried more, tears falling freely now. I pressed more and more, cutting deeper and deeper.

I cut too deep. I wailed and screamed, the pain only worsening. I had hit the bone. I quickly removed the knife, reacting fast. I had realized far too late that I had cut too deep. FAR too deep. Thinking quickly, I grabbed a hoodie from the chair near by and wrapped it tightly around my wound. I rushed to the phone and dialed 911. Despite my efforts, the blood was still pouring freely straight through the fabric. My mind was clouding up, and it was getting harder to see. "Hello, 911 what's your emergency?"

"Help! I cut myself... and... blood lots... I... need... help." I stated weakly, the last of my consciousness slipping away.

Chapter 3

When I woke up I found myself laying in a hospital hooked up to a bag of blood, via IV. On my other hoof, there was an IV connected to a normal saline drip. But most noticeable was the bloody cast.

"Good to see you're awake. I'm doctor Katrina Scan, but you can call me Kat Scan. How are you feeling?" I foreign voice startled me.

"My head hurts a little, and my hoof is pretty sore. What happened? I can't remember.

"We're not exactly sure Miss Coca, but from what we know, you cut your hoof open with a knife. Do you have any memory of that?" Memories of the previous night came flooding back.

"Yes. I... I do. Where's my husband and daughter? Are they okay?"

"Yes, they're fine. They're in the waiting area. I'll bring them in in a minute. Can you feel this?" She said, prodding at the base of my hoof.

"Just barely. What did you do?" She continued poking my forehoof, and each time I felt it.

"Okay, I think you should make a full recovery. We had to surgically repair many nerve endings and blood vessels. Then we had to place a splint on your bone. You managed to fracture it. And then we just stitched you up and placed that cast on. It will have to be changed daily, so you will be here for a while. Okay, I'm going to get your family now." She came back in a second later with them as promised.

"Mommy! Are you okay?! I love you!" Sweet little Cozy Glow was the first to run up to me. She gave me a big hug. She used to love hugs... Sorry, sorry. Rambling again. Her sweet smile was infectious, to say the least.

"Okay Cozy, can you step out for a minute? Mommy and I need to have a little talk." Blue asked her. Back then she listened.

"Okay, Daddy." She said sadly. As soon as she was out of earshot Blue started doing what he does best; yelling.

"What the fuck where you thinking?! Do you have any idea what you put our daughter though?! What you put me through?!"

"Listen Blue, I'm sorry. It was stupid. But my head hurts right now, Can't we please just talk calmly for once?"

"STUPID?! It was more than just stupid! It was wrong! It was selfish! And there is ALWAYS some reason you don't wanna be yelled at! This is important! Not just some stupid mistake! WHY DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND THAT?!"

"Blue, please. I do understand just- I'm sorry okay?! What else do you want me to fucking say?!"

"Oh, so now it's my fault for your mistakes?! What if Cozy had been home?! What if we had come home early and she saw you cutting yourself and covered in blood? What then, huh? FUCKING ANSWER ME! You're not fit to raise this child!" I don't remember much more from that day. I was really drugged up on pain killers. All I remember is he would NOt stop yelling! And then, after about a week of being in the hospital, I was informed that I no longer had custody of Cozy Glow. Blue told me to find my own place. I could have visited Cozy Glow. And I should have. Maybe that's where I went wrong but Celestia damit, I couldn't look Blue in the face without punching him no remorse after what he did to me!

I just... It hurt, you know? Oh what do you know, how would you know what it's like to have your child taken away from you?! Sorry I just- it's just hard. Now I'm just straight-up assuming maybe you do know but- Sorry. I'll just shut up now.

Chapter 4

I... I don’t really know much of what happened afterwards. I was so lost and helpless, I fell into a deep depression. All the drugs and therapists in the world couldn’t cure me then. I do know a little though.

Feeling bad and at fault for all Cozy Glow went through, he... began spoiling her. Spoiling her and spoiling her. If she wanted it, she had it in the blink of an eye. He even allowed her to be homeschooled. Causing her to become more reclusive. More of a book worm. Then the school of friendship opened and well... you know the rest.

Thinking she could have the world, and perhaps troubled by her traumatic and lonely past, she hatched a plan to rule all of Equestria and the lands beyond. I just wish I was there for her...

...

...

Princess?...

“After some deliberation, I have decided Cozy glow will undergo rehabilitation.”

Chapter 1

"Princess Twilight Sparkle, thank you for letting me speak with you today." I said, bowing. Her crown and regal stature was intimidating, her face however, bore a warm reassuring smile. I wish I could have believed she was as kind as she appeared, but I knew things most ponies did not.

"Of course. I do my best to make time for any of my subjects that wish to speak with me of matters they view as important." She spoke with such precision, it felt so, robotic. Too official for the 'princess of friendship.' "So, what is it that bring you here today? Here, come sit." She got up and walked over to a table in the corner of the large throne room. She motioned with her hoof for me to do the same.

I had to think about that for a second. I had come here to do my daughter justice. To make sure all of Equestria knew. Knew that it's not her fault. "Princess, I'm here to tell you about Cozy Glow. The Cozy that I kno-knew." I proceeded to tell her all about what I thought of her stupid fucking 'solution'! My daughter was not merely locked up, but incased in stone! I never even got to tell her... I never even told her I loved her! And now... Oh Celectia, I can't do this!