Rainbow Dash is Replaced by a Cloud
"Rainbow Dash, I'm getting worried for you, darling. You've lost over a hundred pounds!" Rarity said in her normal bitchy voice. "I don't know how you can do your work if you keep losing weight!"
Rainbow Dash let out a few lightning strikes in frustration, nearly hitting Rarity. She floated back a few feet in embarrassment.
"Rainbow Dash, darling, you nearly fucking killed me!" Rarity whined. She shook her head and grabbed her scale to measure Rainbow Dash's weight.
"Rainbow Dash! You're not even a pound! I don't know how in Equestria you're lighter than a feather, but you are!" Rarity sighed. "Now I have to make your dress all over again! Why did you even lose weight right before Twilight's inauguration?"
Rainbow Dash blushed and rained a bit. She allowed Rarity to measure her, wanting to be ready by Twilight's inauguration.
After a few minutes of Rarity measuring Rainbow Dash, Twilight came in through the roof. "Whoops," she said in a dazed state, "I kinda crashed."
Rainbow Dash rushed over to Twilight, raining on her a bit. She went underneath her, lifting her up off the ground in an attempt to help her.
"Rainbow Dash! This better not be some kinky shit!" Twilight yelled. She got up and landed right next to Rarity. "You know what happened last time!"
"How's the packing coming along, Twilight?" Rarity asked as she handed Twilight her newly finished dress to try on. "I can't believe you're going to be president!"
"Neither can I! I'm gonna be so deranged and insane that half the people will hate me! I might even do nothing while a pandemic hits!" Twilight lit up. She literally lit up. Rainbow Dash had gotten a little angry, so she decided to strike Twilight.
"Oo, a campfire!" Pinkie Pie waltzed on in and decided to make some s'mores while Rainbow Dash tried to put Twilight out.
"Have you decided who's going to be vice president?" Rarity asked. "Oh, I hope it's me!"
"Actually," Twilight looked down, "I chose Rainbow Dash. I hope you don't mind."
Apple Jack just happened to pass on by as it is convenient for the plot. "You chose her over me? That's bullshit!"
Rainbow Dash didn't like what Apple Jack had to say about her, so she electrocuted her to death. At least it's better than her complaining. Nopony gave a shit anyways.
Fluttershy burst in through the door with a bunch of animals. "We have to leave! Now!" She rushed to the train station, everyone following behind her.
Blah blah blah, Twilight's inauguration happens, blah blah blah, it goes terribly, you should know this by now so fuck you.
Rainbow Dash was pretty excited that she gets to be vice president. What she wasn't happy about was all the naysayers that were there. Instead of acting upon it like a normal and civilized person, she became a storm and committed mass genocide, killing everyone but the alicorns.
"Rainbow Dash, that kills people! Who are we going to rule if there is no one to rule?" Twilight yelled.
Rainbow Dash blushed as she floated her sexy cloud ass away.
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10 years later and it turns out that humanity is doomed. There are no longer male horses, thus making it hard to reproduce. Back at Twilight's castle, they were trying to find a way to repopulate Equestria again.
"Rainbow Dash, do you think we should venture out of Equestria to try and find a stallion?" Twilight asked. She has been getting a lot bigger lately, her mane getting shittier too.
Rainbow Dash responded with a heavy downpour. She didn't know what the hell to do. The only people left were her, Twilight, Cadence, and her daughter, Blurry Ass. It seems like Celestia and Luna are dead now.
"Ugh, fine. I guess we could try the griffins. I wonder what the offspring would be like.."
"Twilight we are not having babies with griffins! Not in front of my little Blurry Ass!" Cadence pulled her child out of the way at the thought of having a non-pony child.
"Fine, I guess we should split off to look for somepony, anypony. Maybe we could try the human world?" Twilight walked over to the portal. "Maybe I could try with Flash Sentry?"
Rainbow Dash let out a large thunderclap as she didn't like the thought of that idea. She floated to one of the corners to rain a little bit, perhaps to calm herself down.
"Rainbow Dash, maybe you could go to Southern Equestria? There might be some stallions out there that missed the storm." Twilight said as she floated her saddlebag towards her.
Rainbow Dash took the saddlebag and floated her way on down to Southern Equestria. It took a few days, but she made it there. She searched up and down the land, but she stopped when she saw him.
She had seen the hottest cloud she had ever seen. She went up to him and tried to seduce him by raining. She rained until the cloud noticed her, but he just ignored her. She floated away feeling sad and embarrassed about that cloud not having feelings back.
Rainbow kept searching for a stallion. Instead of boring the person reading this with her adventure, the writer is just going to skip back to Twilight's castle because they don't know what to write.
Back at Twilight's castle, Rainbow Dash turned up with nothing but a few extra snacks. Twilight came back pregnant, and when asked about it she simply said that she didn't know who it was with. Cadence came back empty-hoofed.
So, they had to wait a few months to have Twilight give birth to a male pegasus. She raised him by herself, and hoped that one day Blurry Ass and her child will have a child of their own.
Rainbow Dash ends up staying single forever, as it would be nearly impossible for her to be with someone. Cadence is just a widow for the rest of time as her husband is dead.
Author's Note
i am so sorry to anyone who actually read through the whole thing i wrote this at 1am while i was very tired
