Wedding Planning is Complicated
“Ugh, are you suuure we can’t get somepony else to do this for us? I’m pretty sure they have their own name, too. Wedding Planners.” As usual, Rainbow Dash could not sit still. Currently, she was hovering over the table that was full of wedding imagery, and whose lone occupant was only getting more and more frustrated with her.
“Ah told ya, Dash, they ain’t gonna do all th’ work for ya’. They’ll still be workin’ with us to plan it. Now, if ya could take this seriously fer a moment, please?” Applejack gestured back towards the mountain of photos laid out on the table.
“No, no, no! Trust me on this one AJ, I am taking this seriously. It’s just... so much to think about. I’m not used to thinking about a lot of things. It’s usually just “fly faster” or “a bit more to the right” or something simple like that. Ooh, how about Twilight?! She thinks about a ton of stuff all the time! I bet she’d be a master at this! We should totally send her a letter.” Rainbow Dash was halfway out the door when she felt the familiar pull of her tail. She looked back to find Applejack biting it, pulling her back into the farmhouse.
“Oh no ya don’t!” She said as she spat out the tail in her mouth. “I don’t wanna plan a wedding with Twilight, I want a wedding with you, Dash. Don’t forget that you was the one that proposed to me. Y’all shoulda known this was gonna happen.”
Rainbow groaned. “I wasn’t thinking about all this egghead stuff, I was just thinking about the whole “I love you” thing.” Reluctantly, she rejoined Applejack at the table. “Let’s just get this over with. What’s first on the list of things to decide?”
Applejack pulled out a long scroll from her saddlebags. Twilight had taken the liberty of making a Wedding Planner Planner, which Applejack assumed was made from Twilight’s Wedding Planner Planner Planner. Thinking about such things just made Rainbow’s head hurt.
“First is pickin’ the size of the weddin’ by makin’ a guest list. So who’re y’all gonna pick?”
“Well definitely all of our friends. Twilight, Pinkie, Rarity, Fluttershy, Spike, and Starlight make six, plus Scoots and my parents makes nine. Then I guess we’ll need to include both Cheese Sandwich and Sunburst as dates for Pinkie and Starlight, so that’s... eleven. Oh! And Rarity’s sister, Sweetie Belle. Twelve. And... I think that’s it. Twelve it is then!”
“Alright, well ah’ve gotta invite Apple Bloom, Big Bac, and Granny Smith. And if Big Mac is comin’, then Sugar Belle’s gotta come, too. And we’ve gotta save room for all the grannies if Granny Smith is goin’. Plus that hippogriff boy from school Apple Bloom’s been crushin’ on. There’s Braeburn, and the Oranges, and a few of the Pears that've reached back out to us, and-“
“AJ, stop.” Rainbow Dash was holding onto Applejack’s cheeks, making her stop and focus on the mare in front of her rather than her extended family. “Without adding any more ponies, how many do you think you’ve planned to invite so far?”
“Ah dunno, maybe thirty? Forty? It depends on if we give ‘em all a “plus one”, and ah’m sure plenty won’t even show up.“
Rainbow pulled away from Applejack and slumped down in her chair. “Great. We can’t even agree on Step 1. Should we skip ahead and come back to it?”
Applejack started re-reading the scroll. “Ah dunno. Twilight didn’t mention any skippin’ around, and these steps are clearly numbered. Ah think we should stick to the plan.”
“Oh c’mon AJ, what’s the worst that can happen by doing them out of order? The wedding still not getting planned? How scary,” she mocked.
Reluctantly, Applejack started reading the second step. “Fine, but if we get eaten by some sea beast, ah’m blamin’ you.”
“Fine by me. You already blame me for lots of stuff anyways.”
“Only ‘cuz it’s usually your fault. The second step says to “determine length of the ceremony.” Basically how involved y’all want it. I’m assumin’ we both want this to be fast?”
“What? No way! If I’m having a wedding, it’s gonna be the most awesome wedding ever in the history of weddings. Ever. There’s gotta be three Pinkie Parties, before, during, and after, and I’ve gotta have the Wonderbolts fly above as we get married.”
“Doesn’t bein’ their boss kinda ruin the... flair of the Wonderbolt fly-by?”
“I mean, yeah, a little, but it’s always been my dream for them to fly at my wedding, and I’m not about to pass up the opportunity to cross off another item from my bucket list.”
“Alright. That’s now two things we disagree on. Is there nothin’ we both want?”
“I’m fine with an outdoor wedding. I know you want one of those.”
“Great! We agree on a single thing! We c’n start here and work our way out.”
Applejack and Rainbow Dash collapsed on their bed, previously just Applejack’s bed, after four hours of planning. They both let out exasperated sighs, and started cuddling on the bed. As per usual, Applejack was the big spoon. Rainbow Dash learned to stop arguing against it when she learned just how good it felt to be hugged and comforted by a large Earth Pony.
“Well, that accomplished nothing,” Rainbow complained. Her only reply was a squeeze around her barrel and a nuzzle under her neck. “I mean, is it supposed to take that long? We were down there for forever, and we barely moved past anything but the most basic of details.”
“Ah dunno, Sugarcube. Though ah guess we shouldn’t’a thought plannin’ a weddin’ for two of the most awesome ponies in Equestria was ever gonna be easy.”
They settled there for a moment, and Dash watched as the colors outside slowly turned from its usual reddish hues to the calming purples and blues of the night. Say what you will about the day and night without Celestia and Luna, thought Rainbow Dash, but Twilight certainly knows her, well, twilights.
“Hey AJ?” Dash called out, hoping the farmpony was still awake.
“Yeah, Dash?” Came a slightly groggy, but definitely still awake, reply.
“What if... we’re not ready for this step yet?” A small sigh from behind her shifted a few strands of hair into her face, making her shift her hooves to move them back into the right place.
“Dash, what’re ya goin’ on about?” Applejack shifted so she was no longer hugging Rainbow Dash, which allowed them to look directly at each other. “You meant what ya said when ya proposed, didn’t’cha?”
Rainbow knew the implications of that question. Applejack barely tolerated little white lies, so lying during a proposal would be... bad. “Yeah. I mean, yes. Every single mushy lovey dovey word.”
“And you know that ah meant it when ah said “yes,” don’t’cha?” She brushed more of Rainbow’s hair out of her face. How is this thing always a mess? Applejack thought.
“Yeah, Miss Element of Honesty, I’m fairly certain you didn’t tell a lie, especially one so important.” Rainbow shook her mane back out, causing most of it to fall back into her face again.
“Then you’ve got nothin’ to worry about, Sugarcube. Ah love you, and you love me, and it’ll be like that fer forever n’ ever.”
“No, I mean, I get that. It’s just... well, this is just harder than I thought it’d be. Are you sure we shouldn’t ask the girls for help? That’s never gone wrong before.”
“If’n ya don’t count any of the times it did, like decoration’ the castle the first time, or organizin’ the Summer Sun Celebration, or-“
“Yeah, yeah, I get it! So we’ve goofed up a few times. We always fix everything in the end... mostly.”
Applejack sighed. “Alright, fine. We c’n talk with the girls tomorrow. I jus’ don’t want it to become their marriage, too.”
Rainbow Dash pumped a hoof above her head, and then yelped in pain as it hit the headboard. “Ow. Thanks AJ. I’m sure everything will turn out just fine, just you wait and see.”
“See! And you two thought that the Party Pony couldn’t make you the bestest. Party. Ever!” Pinkie exclaimed as she launched herself into one of the many cakes scattered throughout the area.
The ceremony had just ended with a Wonderbolt salute, but the reception was just getting started. Everything had gone exactly to Pinkie’s plan. The wedding was on Sweet Apple Acres, right where Applejack’s parents got married so many years ago. The venue comfortably held most of the Apple Family on the right, and the rest of the guests on the left. The decorations were not entirely farm-themed, nor entirely Wonderbolt-themed, but rather a comfortable mix of both. Pinkie Pie had, of course, catered, providing many baked delights, and one huge white cake in the center of everything, with two comparably tiny figurines on the very top.
“Well, ah’ll admit it. Ah was wrong. When it comes to parties, nopony does better than Pinkie.” Applejack was determined to make a dent in the huge cake, and so was now working on her third piece already.
“Yeah, but who could’ve guessed that she had already planned our wedding?!” Rainbow Dash was, as usual, in the air, flying circles in front of the table Applejack was sitting at. “I mean, I know that she knows everything about everypony, and is Twilight-levels of organized, but already planning our perfect wedding? If I didn’t know any better, I’d think there’s something suspicious going on...”
Applejack stopped eating and stared incredulously at her new wife. “Dash... it’s Pinkie Pie. She’s always suspicious. Now si’down and eat yer cake.”
Dash groaned, but still complied. “Ugh, fine. But only ‘cuz you asked so nicely, Mrs. Dash.”
“Oh no. There’s no way in Tartarus I’m takin’ yer name. Yer an Apple now, best get used to it.”
Dash was once again out of her seat. “What! But-“
“No “but”s. Anypony who marries into the Apple family becomes an Apple. Ain’t no way around that.”
“Alright, but our first kid is gonna be a Wonderbolt, wether they’re a Pegasus or an Earth Pony.” Dash returned to her seat and took what was probably too big of a bite of her cake.
“Wait, and what ‘bout Unicorns?”
Dash took a moment to finish chewing. “Well, duh. Neither of us is a Unicorn. Kinda unlikely that we’d end up with one.”
Applejack was stunned for a moment as she tried to understand Rainbow Dash’s logic. “Hun... ya do know we can’t have our own kids, right?”
Rainbow Dash looked at her like she was the crazy one. “What’dya mean? Of course we can. Last I checked all my bits still work, though I’d really prefer not to be the one to get pregnant, as I’ll have to stop being a Wonderbolt for a while.”
Applejack rolled her eyes and took another bite of her cake. That crazy Pegasus, she thought. Then she smiled. My crazy Pegasus.
Author's Note
A silly idea I’ve had for a little while.
AppleDash was my first and only ship in any show, So I’ve wanted to write something for it since I joined a million years ago especially after it was hinted to be canon in the final episode. And so my first fic is now shameless fluff of the two best ponies having a nice wedding.
