Murder Time, Fun Time

The day after Kingdom Come Records got blown up for the third time, Pinkamena and Playa returned to the church to see what Johnny’s next move against the Vice Kings was going to be. Instead they found a note on his desk that mentioned that he was going to spend the rest of the day with Aisha and that they could take a day for themselves to do whatever.

Before any plans could be made, however, Julius busted into the room like he was in a panic about something. When he saw the desk empty and the mute and mare there instead, his expression really did turn to one of panic.

“Where’s Gat?” Julius demanded. Playa showed him the note which only worsened his anxiety. “Fuck! Listen carefully, you two. Benjamin King just called. It seems like one of his boys got a big head and tried to take him out. He’s pinned down in the park in Amberbrook right now and needs some help.”

“Yeah, I figured this would be about the time Warren and Tanya made their move,” Pinkamena said, cutting Julius off. “If he had kept a better eye on his subordinates, he probably could have seen that coming. So are we waiting it out, assisting the coup, or rescuing King?”

Julius took a moment to shake his head to clear his jumbled thoughts. “Save his ass. King and I got history and I ain’t lettin’ him go down like this.”

“Okie dokie. C’mon Playa, looks like our day off starts with a rescue mission.”

The drive to the park in Amberbrook was uneventful but once they arrived, the two of them had to go through a large number of VK thugs to get to King. Pinkamena chucked a number of grenades into the crowds of VK which made them jump away. Playa gunned them down while they were trying to get up from their dive after their efforts to escape an explosion. Meanwhile, Pinkamena turned some VK into medium well pieces of meat with a few molotov cocktails.

Once the way was clear, the duo met Ben atop the bridge in the park. “You the two Julius sent?” he asked.

“That’s us,” Pinkamena replied. “Nice party you have here.”

“Before we get outta here, help me kill Warren.”

“I’m starting to like you already. Make sure you give me plenty of pages in your book.”

“What book?”

Pinkamena ignored him and let Playa take the wheel while she got on the bed of King’s truck and pulled out her party cannon. Every VK car that headed for them was met with an explosion of confetti and explosive frosting.

Soon Warren’s car was in view and Playa gave chase. Warren saw the pink pony on the truck and realized that he was looking at the creature that Tanya was talking about; the one that had been giving her nightmares since she fled the old police station. “You’re the thing that’s got Tanya runnin’ scared?! This is perfect, I get to kill everyone that’s been gettin’ in my way in one fell swoop,” he shouted.

“I’m having so much fun mangling every cock that’s been inside that bitch. Now, it’s your turn,” Pinkamena replied with a twisted smile.

Unfortunately for Warren, he chose to drive a car that wasn’t built to withstand a lot of punishment since his car was up in flames from one hit of Pinkamena’s party cannon.

“So long, Warren. Thanks for the help, you two. Now take me to Julius,” Ben said.

“Playa, you handle the rest. I have a message to give to someone,” Pinkamena said. She jumped off the truck and watched it drive away. Once the truck was gone, she walked up to the blazing car that Warren drove.

A few moments later, the driver’s side door of the car opened and Warren fell out of the car, slightly burnt in appearance. His left leg appeared to be stuck as he struggled to pull it out. A few seconds later, he noticed Pinkamena staring at him. “What? You come to finish the job? Better make your shot count.”

Pinkamena giggled at Warren’s posturing. She slowly advanced on the struggling VK lieutenant. “Oh Warren, acting like a big shot just because you can’t accept your fate that you’re a C-list character at best. Maybe if you had kept your head down and stayed loyal to King you might have ended up with a bigger role, maybe even become a B-list. But now, all you are is part of a message for that ambitious prostitute.” With that, she pulled out her pistol and shot Warren in the head. “Time to get to work.”

Ten minutes later, Tanya arrives at the scene of Warren’s smoldering car. She had intended to make sure Warren was dead so she could seize control of the Vice Kings. What she saw instead was something she wasn’t expecting.

The flames of Warren’s car had been put out but it had also been spray painted pink and had blue and yellow balloons painted all over it. Warren’s body was standing in the street. His suit had been painted pink and his arms were held up by one blue balloon each and his head by a yellow balloon. The balloons were somehow holding up Warren’s entire body to a standing position. His body was standing on a chalk drawing of the same creepy smile from her nightmares. One last detail that Tanya noticed was that Warren was wearing a paper mask that had her own face drawn on it.

Tanya knew that this was a message from that pink monster. While some small part of her was glad to be rid of the last competition to become leader of the VK, most of her was terrified that she was being hunted by a terrifying serial killer.

With the message received, Tanya ran back to her car and retreated to King’s penthouse hoping the gang would protect her.

“Mena, do you have to keep scaring Tanya?” Pinkie asked.

“If I could get away with something like that in Equestria, that would have been something I would have done for Nightmare Night. Besides, she needs to be taken out one way or another if we are to get the Vice Kings out of Stillwater and terrifying her is one way to keep her off her game so she doesn’t plan any effective counter attacks against us,” Pinkamena explained.

“Are you going to be that way with the other gangs?”

“Dunno yet, we’ll see. For now, we have some favors to do nearby.”

“What about our day off?”

“I wanna spend it having fun so we can say it’s a day off from fucking with the Vice Kings.”

“Okie dokie lokie.”

The first location they found was inside a garage filled with drugs. The person they were supposed to meet wore a white tank top, a gold chain around his neck and a backwards baseball cap.

“What? I asked the Saint’s for someone to help me with some deliveries and they sent a pink mule?” the man complained.

That comment did not sit well with Pinkamena but since she needed to help him she decided on a passive aggressive approach. “You want to tell me what you want me to do for your deliveries in a way that doesn’t end up with a lighter among your stash that may result in losing your entire business?”

The man took a moment to think about what was said and chose to try and salvage the situation. ”Let’s start over, I’m Marvin.” He held his hand out.

“Pinkamena.” She reached his hand with her hoof and the two shook.

“Alright, you’re here to help so let’s get down to business. I got the best goddamn product in Stilwater. Now see that’s good, ‘cause my buyers need this shit like porn stars need cock, but stealin’ junkies away from other dealers has a tendency to create bad feelings if ya know what I’m sayin’. You cover my ass when I’m slingin’, and I’ll make sure you see the green.”

“Fine but on one condition: I drive.”

“But you don’t know where my buyers are.”

“Trust me, I’ll know where they are.”

Marvin hesitated for a moment before acquiescing to the pony’s demand. “...Fine. Just lead me to the buyers.”

With that, Pinkamena switched out with Pinkie and got into the driver’s seat of Marvin’s car while he got into the passenger seat. Marvin was surprised by the mare’s sudden change in appearance, “What the fuck happened to you?!”

Pinkie giggled, “This is my driving face.”

Marvin was having second thoughts about being driven around by a pony but suppressed those thoughts once Pinkie drove off. It wasn’t long before the police started getting interested in what was going on. Each time Pinkie made a stop, Pinkamena took over and took out police cars through various means from explosives to pastry based props and sometimes a rubber chicken which confused the police long enough to lose concentration on the road.

The Vice Kings started getting involved in the chase as well. Of course, the only time the VK or the police could actually attack the dealer or the driver was while deals were being made. Once again, Pinkie’s driving skills made her pursuers question their need for a vacation as she drove in impossible ways.

The police, however, were more determined than the VK were as they started blocking the road with SWAT vans and soon police helicopters. FBI vans were deployed during the last rounds of drug deals. By then, the Vice Kings lost interest in the pursuit because they didn’t want the police to notice them, especially now that King no longer had the police chief around his finger.

Despite the very best efforts by the police, however, the drug deals were completed and Marvin had gone into hiding until the heat was off him. Before he hid, he gave Pinkie a symbol that somehow made the Vice Kings a little more forgiving for any actions done against them by her.

With that task complete, Pinkie moved on to the next task which was near Marvin’s garage.

The task given to her this time was a simple street race. The recruiter, a man named Tyell, was in need of one more racer because one of the racers disappeared last week after hitting some kid with his car. He didn’t question Pinkie’s appearance which meant that he was desperate for anyone to take to the race track.

Given Pinkie’s driving skills, she completed each race with ease while the other racers were scratching their heads and heading to the nearest hospital to see if they had a concussion after watching the pink party mare’s ridiculous stunts such as making instant turns without dealing with inertia or driving on walls. She even drove around the corner of a building while on the building. It was as if the mare had never heard of physics or that she came straight out of a 30s cartoon.

Regardless, Pinkie’s prize was a coupon for a ten percent discount on all vehicle customizations at all participating Rim Jobs stores.

The sun was beginning to set and the mare’s day off was coming to an end. Pinkie was tired from all the fun she had today so it was time to head back to the crib near the church and turn in for the night.

Pinkamena had a good feeling that tomorrow would be the last day the Vice Kings would plague Stilwater.