Author's Note

I'm gonna be honest, what I wrote toward the end is at least a little messed up. Basically, it changed the VK story a tiny bit but it really only affects this mission and the next one.

Pink Terror

Pinkamena was actually impressed by how long it took the Vice Kings to react after the Saints had taken over Prawn Court and Tanya Winters’ precious brothel. Shortly after she and Playa left the slightly damaged brothel, Playa received a call from one of the lesser members of the gang to tell them that the Vice Kings were attempting to retake one of the districts that were taken from them.

While Pinkamena was itching to rip apart the Vice Kings who had the nerve to take back what she had taken from them, she had another problem to deal with: one from within.

“Menaaaaaa....I’m bored. Can we go find something else to do besides killing people?”

Pinkamena sighed, while she never liked feeling bored herself, she also wouldn’t let her other self suffer the same feeling. “Alright, one of the Saints’ allies is nearby in Shivington which is west of Prawn Court. We can leave Playa to handle the pushback stuff while we handle whatever this person wants.”

The madmare left Playa behind to find her own car to drive to Shivington. Meanwhile, Pinkamena received another call, which was from Johnny this time, saying that Monroe the Police Chief was putting pressure on the Saints and that she and Playa should lie low for the time being before some new information came up and he told her to head back to Prawn Court because the Vice Kings were trying to take back that place as well. For her counterpart, Pinkamena decided to ignore that order and let Playa handle Vice Kings for the time being. Just in case he didn’t get the last message, she called him to update him on the situation.

The marked location on their map brought them to a small pub on a street corner. Above the door was the name of the pub, “Sea Roses”. Pinkamena went in to meet the Saints’ latest source of reputation and ended up sitting next to a man with an orange leather jacket over a brown button-up and a white t-shirt underneath. He was also wearing a pair of glasses.

The man looked at the mare strangely, as if expecting something different or that he had had enough beer to drink for the rest of the day. After a minute the man finally spoke up, “I was expecting someone who looked...human.”

“We can’t always get what we want,” Pinkamena said. “What do you need?”

“If you’re the kind who can take out a line of witnesses then yeah, you can help me.”

Pinkamena smiled widely enough to be borderline creepy. The man had a feeling that he should take that as a ‘yes’. The man continued, “Name’s Marcel. One of my guys is in trouble and I need you to help. He’s got a big court case comin’ up and the prosecutor has a whole line of witnesses that could put him away...needless to say, that ain’t gonna happen. I got a list of all the witnesses and I’ll pay you for each one you can take out.” He gave Pinkamena eight photos of each of the witnesses as well as a weapon icon paperclipped to each which Pinkamena guessed was the method he wanted her to use to kill them. She was sure she could find a creative way to kill with each weapon anyway.

Pinkie took this time to pipe up, “Mena, this sounds like another ‘you’ activity. Let’s go find another one.”

Pinkamena had a question for Marcel before she left. “How long do I have to clear the list?”

“‘Bout a week or so before his trial so until then.”

With that, Pinkamena left the pub with the photos and drove to find another activity for Pinkie to do. An activity was found on the map to the west of Union Square in Downtown Stillwater called Filmore. This time her journey took her to a side street garage where they saw a man in a black tank top and having long black hair done up in dreadlocks. Pinkie took over before he noticed.

The man finished up the last touches to the car he was working on before addressing the pony, “Uhh...I was expecting some help for a job but can you even drive?”

“Yupperoonie,” Pinkie said enthusiastically and vigorously nodding.

The man somehow had a feeling that he could trust her with the job he had for her. “The name’s Samson and these are for you.” He handed her a number of photos. “Here’s a list of cars I need. Bring them to me and you’ll be makin’ some extra cheddar.”

“He means money,” Pinkamena clarified.

Samson continued, “Not all the ones on the list I can take as is. You’ll have to take the ones you steal to a Rim Jobs to have the necessary parts installed on them. I can’t simply get the parts myself because of my reputation. So what you say?”

“Okie dokie lokie,” Pinkie replied. As she left the garage, her phone rang. She answered it to find Johnny on the other line.

“Troy just got a tip that Tanya’s setting up shop in the old Sunnyvale police station. I talked to Julius, and he gave me the okay to go in with a crew. I’m headin’ back to the church to get strapped. Come over when you’re ready, but don’t wait too long, we got some murderin’ to do.” He hung up without waiting for a response.

Pinkie wasn’t sure whether or not Johnny would be angry about her not helping with Prawn Court but he didn’t seem that way. It was a relief for her in a way.

Despite Johnny’s request for them to not keep him waiting too long, Pinkie wandered around the Downtown area looking for cars on the chop shop list. To her good luck, she came across a Nelson and a Bulldog for her to give to Samson. Pinkamena had to take over to kill the drivers before Pinkie took both of them to a mechanic to get a Street Spoiler installed on the Nelson and for the Bulldog, a Luxury Body Kit and some Stylish Rims as the notes requested. She earned five thousand dollars for her troubles.

Before the pink mare left Downtown though, she spotted a Quota that was wanted by Samson. However, when Pinkamena took over to kill the driver, she went for overkill by blowing up the Quota and the meter maid inside with one of the RPGs she still had from Sunnyvale.

“What did you do that for?” Pinkie demanded.

“I recognized the meter maid in the photos. Said I needed to blow her up with an RPG,” Pinkamena responded.

“Couldn’t you have blown her up after I took the car?”

“That’s boring. The explosion wouldn’t have been as impressive if I did it like that.”

Pinkie pursed her lips but not for long as another meter maid drove another Quota nearby for the party mare to steal. After ejecting the meter maid, Pinkie drove the vehicle back to the chop shop, thankfully not stealing the vehicle while the police were looking. On the way, Pinkamena had Pinkie stick one of her pinata bats out the window over the sidewalk and drive next to the curb for a few seconds. Pinkie obeyed which resulted in a pedestrian getting his skull caved in by a fast moving bat.

“Louise: check, Marty: check,” Pinkamena said with a cackle.

“Hey! You made me kill someone,” Pinkie complained.

“Relax, Pinkie. Nobody in this city is going to go crazy over one random guy getting his brain batted all the way to the suburbs. He was on the list so we will even get paid for killing that guy. Besides, this isn’t Equestria anymore. There are no all powerful princesses ruling over this city; just a do-nothing government and an overworked police department who only go after you if you go on a killing spree or attack them directly.”

“That’s a really dark picture you’re painting, Mena.”

“This is where that creature sent us. Here, we’re either predator or prey and, to reiterate, there are no all powerful princesses to protect us.”

The rest of the trip to the chop shop was spent in silence.

On the way back to the church, Pinkamena had some more fun. Of the people on the hit list, she found Dick, who she did some impromptu surgery upon with her kitchen knife and didn’t bother to close the gaping wound she left. She found Richard, who she dismembered before she shot him in every non-vital area and let him bleed out.

She found Henry, who was riding a limousine. She fired her party cannon at the driver who panicked and crashed the limo into a post. Henry climbed out just to have his face made unrecognizable by a storm of SMG bullets.

When she found Billy Bob, she decided to confront him by wearing a purple bandanna around her neck and a stetson much like the one Applejack wore as well as bearing a wicked smirk. She pointed a 12 Gauge shotgun at the frightened man before speaking, “Well Billy Bob, looks like you done earned yerself a shotgun weddin’. And I ain’t talkin’ ‘bout no woman.” At point blank range, the force from the shotgun sent him flying into the street where some careless driver made sure the job was finished.

The last one Pinkamena found in the Downtown area was Hank who suffered immolation by a flying burning bottle of whiskey hitting his face because he kept his window open in his delivery truck.

Without any more targets for either facet of the pink pony to deal with for the time being, Pinkie returned to the church to prepare for the attack on the abandoned police station in Sunnyvale.

Playa was waiting for the pink pony to arrive before the two of them entered Johnny’s war room. The man in question was deciding on which weapon to bring with him to the raid on the old police station. Once he finally decided on a VICE 9 pistol, a Tombstone shotgun and a switchblade, the three of them made their way to the police station where the crew was poised to take it.

It didn’t take long to clear out the entrance before Playa and Johnny charged in. Before Pinkamena could join them, Pinkie warned her that her Pinkie Sense was sensing a trap and that she should hang back. As much as she would have liked to get in on the action, Pinkamena knew her counterpart was better with Pinkie Sense than her so she listened and followed the trail of corpses to a room with only one door where she saw Playa on the floor and Johnny with his shotgun on the floor and his pistol in Tanya’s hands. There was also a muscular-looking person holding his own shotgun to Johnny’s back. If what the mare heard about the VK leadership was true then the man had to be Big Tony. Pinkamena thought the name appropriate.

“Do yourself a favor, and stay down and shut the fuck up,” Anthony said. “You 3rd Street mothafuckas think you so smart. Well check this out, we ain’t impressed. Hell, the only reason you got as far as you did was ‘cause King let you. We led you right to where we wanted you, and now the police are gonna finish your ass for good, just the way we planned.”

“Well, that explains how your bitch lost Prawn Court,” Johnny snarked.

“Are you gonna let him talk about me like-” Tanya complained. Anthony quickly reassured her that he could handle it.

“Yeah Tanya, shut the fuck up,” Johnny said.

“I thought I told you to be quiet,” Anthony said.

“I got shitty hearing.”

Anthony’s patience with Johnny’s mouth ran out as he shot the snarky Saint in the knee. The pain Johnny felt was intense as he screamed in agony.

“Now you got a shitty leg.”

Johnny replied to Anthony’s attack with a switchblade in the bodyguard’s left foot. “So do you.”

Before Johnny could get up to grapple with Anthony, the bodyguard screamed even louder than when the switchblade stabbed his foot as his right calf was impaled by a kitchen knife that was thrown from outside the room. Tanya pointed her pistol at the entryway expecting something to come through at any moment but no one came. When she looked out the doorway she saw no evidence that anyone was there.

Anthony used the adrenaline rush he gained from the mysterious attack to punch Johnny hard enough to knock him out. Playa got up to attack Anthony but he was thrown out of the room and fell down the stairs. He then pulled the knife out of his leg and threw it toward the doorway.

“Baby, let’s get out of here. Now!” Tanya said, her voice not hiding fear.

“But what about-”

“Something doesn’t feel right. Like if we don’t get out of here now, we ain’t gonna.”

“Fine, just let me-” Anthony attempted to pick up Johnny only to drop him as he experienced pain beyond what any mortal should ever experience as he looked down and saw the same kitchen knife that he had removed from his leg before was now stuck in one of his testacles and nearly slicing his dick in half. Unlike before, this time there was a dull pink hoof holding the knife. Sitting behind the poor man was a dull pink pony with a long dark pink mane and tail and a maniacal grin that would make the Cheshire Cat from the Lewis Carroll story jealous.

While Anthony howled in agony at a soprano’s pitch, the insane pink pony pulled the knife free, leaving the wound to spray blood and Anthony desperately clutching the wound in vain. She shook some of the blood from the knife before speaking, “Guess you won’t be fucking that anymore. Too bad, but I’ve seen bigger.”

It was at that point that Tanya’s panic levels peaked and she jumped out of the nearest window. She landed on a dumpster but was still well enough to sprint back to her car and drive as far as she could from the nightmare that she could never erase from her mind.

With Tanya gone, Pinkamena checked on Johnny and Playa. Thankfully, Johnny was only knocked out and Playa managed to avoid any major injuries from his tumble down the stairs. The psychotic mare dragged Johnny away from the growing pool of blood that Anthony was making from his gushing wound and set him beside Playa at the bottom of the stairs. She then went back to Anthony and picked up one of the shotguns off the floor and blasted Anthony in the head to put him out of his misery. To capture the moment, she pulled out a camera from her mane and took a photo of Anthony’s corpse.

A few minutes later, Johnny woke up groaning, “Ugh...haven’t felt this bad since that one time I went binge drinkin’. Not to mention I thought I heard a tone deaf little girl try singin’ the shittiest opera ever. What happened?”

“Basically, you and Playa got knocked out by Tony and I killed him,” Pinkamena reported. “Oh and Tanya escaped.”

“Well, at least we got one of the bastards. Still, there’s not too many places for Tanya to hide out. She might end up hiding out at Anthony’s condo. Once I get a brace for this shitty leg, I’ll join you in takin’ her out. In the meantime, why don’t you two find a couple of the Vice Kings strongholds and send King a nice ‘fuck you’ for all the trouble his bitch is puttin’ us through.”

Pinkamena couldn’t disagree with that but for the time being, they needed to get off the streets. She woke Playa up and had him help Johnny to his car. Pinkie took over and drove the group back to the church, avoiding the police’s efforts to stop her.