Author's Note

Second-Person is now gone from this point forward.

We have a Discord now!

Chapter 24 - Remembrance

Anon opened his eyes wide, realizing that he was standing. In front of him stood Gehrman, leaning on his scythe and giving Anon a smug grin. Anon looked around for a few moments, his breathing slowing when he realized where he was. He looked at Gehrman and sighed. "What the hell is going on?"

"A hunter asking questions never ends well. It's better to simply exist in the world that's already created."

Anon shook his head, turning away from Gehrman. They both stood in the flower-fields, the exact place that Anon had lost his life before re-appearing in Equestria. "You don't know anything, old man. Your one of the reasons everything is like this. You're an idiot, just like Laurence and the others. Your the reason Maria killed herself, you know."

Anon could hear an audible sigh from behind, and a few steps coming up to the right side. Gehrman stared off into nothingness beside him. "I know. No matter what I do, it will always be with me. It will always pain me. I sat in a wheelchair, trying to think of myself as helpless, when I've made myself that way to begin with."

Anon chuckled. "A killer with a conscience?"

"Your one to talk." Gehrman said with a chuckle himself.

Anon shook his head, still staring into the abyss of mist in the distance, with tall, lanky pillars shooting up so high into the sky you weren't able to tell where they stopped. "I never thought about my killings. I understand them- I know why I did them. I'm not sad about why I've killed, I'm sad that I had to."

Gehrman gave him a glance before returning his gaze. "Nobody ever forced you to pick up that hammer, or that sword."

"Maybe not. But what would I be if I didn't?"

Gehrman laughed this time, giving a smile. "Nothing but a bloodstain on the floor, that's for sure. So you picked the better option. It might've not been good, but why regret it? You were forced to either die or live."

Anon slowly lowered himself to the ground, sitting with his legs crossed. "Because I saw what's on the other side. I know what life could be like, but I know that this world fucked itself over. But we're human, aren't we? We always find a way to mess something up, one way or another. Even if we're trying to make it better."

Gehrman lowered himself, shakily, to the ground as well, his legs splayed out. "The blood was meant to heal us."

"And look how that turned out. Not very fucking great, huh?"

Gehrman sighed, shaking his head. "No. Not great at all."

Anon stayed silent for a few minutes, his mind racing. Why was he here? Is this some sort of dream, as his body was being possessed by that demon? Is this his consciousness trying to give him some closure before death? Either way, he didn't care. As much as he hated the world he came from, it was home. It was soothing. It was what he knew. Even if it was filled with bloodstarved beasts, it was always going to feel more real than anything else.

"Anon."

"Yeah?"

"I didn't want to kill you."

Anon smirked, looking at him. "That right?"

"It's true. Your young. You've experienced the night like no one before. You deserved to wake up. If you let me-"

"Kill me? Isn't that what you didn't want to do?"

Gehrman shook his head. "You don't understand. If you had let me kill you then, it would have woken you up. Taken you to a world where the night did not exist, where you were a real person. But once you refused my offer, it was known to the Old Ones that you were unwilling, or the next host. You failed in killing me, so that is how that ended."

Anon shrugged. "You have to admit, it's hard for me to believe that me allowing you to kill me would just fix all of my problems. Even to an insane person that would seem stupid."

Gehrman smiled. "It is stupid. But I really am too old to question these things."

Anon sighed. "I have no more control over my body, Gehrman. I'm sentenced to death. A permanent kind, if it's not resolved. I'm afraid that I'll hurt the people I've grown to care for, even if it has been for only a few days. It's scary, Gehrman. Really, really scary."

Gehrman looked over at me and nodded. "It's okay to be scared. Hunters are not always as fearless as we claim them to be. The reason why we push that fearlessness so hard into our Hunters is simply because we want the world to see them as just that. Heroes of some sort. They yell and complain, they tell us to go away and do our job when we knock on their door, but after the night? After the blood moon? They praise us."

"I was never looking for praise, Gehrman. You know that."

"I know that. Most Hunters don't take the job to be paid in respect and praise. They get paid by keeping their conscious busy. Most of us Hunters are depressed beings, and if we were to even stop for a second to question what we were doing or even the very nature of ourselves, we would find our trusty pistols aimed at ourselves."

Anon nodded. "I remember when I saw my first suicide. I told myself I was never going to get that deep, that I would be fine no matter the circumstance. And yet, here I am. I've contemplated it multiple times, and now..? I feel weak, Gehrman. Weak to the point of no return. It isn't my physical form that defies me, it's my mental capacity."

"You are not weak, Anon. You're simply human."

"Hmph. At this point, that almost feels like a lie. Humanity seems like it's the beast in this situation, not the actual blood-starved creatures that roam our streets. Considering the horrors we've both seen, I would say we aren't human at all. Not anymore atleast. We're... something worse. Something darker- something bloodier. I think the gods are afraid of us."

"The gods are afraid of us, they've been afraid of us for a long time Anon. Even in the world that you've visited, do you think the gods haven't reached that far yet? Who do you think that amalgamation of animal parts is? Discord? An eldritch being forgotten by the other gods, before his true consciousness was awoken. It was not you who plagued that world- it was simply you that woke his conscious."

Anon whipped his head to look at Gehrman. "What? That thing- the thing that summoned the Mad Ones?"

Gehrman nodded. "Even in a world as beautiful as that one, it seems the gods always find a way to plague it. The only difference between our world and theirs, is that Discord is not invincible. He can be killed, and should he die, so will the nightmares that plague that world. Perhaps you and the world can still be saved."

Anon shook his head, his fists balling up. "I don't think so. If I'm not there, who else is going to save them? I'm the only one that knows about these things- they don't."

Gehrman sighed, shaking his head. "The messengers are capable of sending their unique and cryptic messages across time and space, into other universes, other timelines. They've notified a certain person that the Hunter's secret has been told, and now someone is on the way."

"But... The only person-"

"Lady Maria will make her entrance into that new world soon to cut you down, Anon. Should she fail, that world will likely fall. In order for you to be saved, you must give up your life and accept that this is the only way to save something so beautiful."

Anon got up, shaking his head angrily. "No! I've died once- to you! I'm not going to die again!"

"Anon!" Gehrman said, wobbling up to the standing position. "That is not you who is in control of your body! You are a demonic version of who you once were, and the only thing you can do now is to sit and accept it! The lamps cannot save you- your knowledge cannot save you- you can only save yourself by accepting it. You can try your best to defy the phantom that plagues your mind but that is all."

Anon shook his head again, looking off into the infinite fog.

The seemingly infinitely rising tree's going further and further into the unknown above, Anon felt like he was floating. He had experienced death before, but not in a way like this. He knew of a better world- one that could be peaceful if done right! Yet in order for it to persist, he would have to give up his chance of living it. To accept death.

Lady Maria was not a woman that was known for holding back, especially on other Hunters. When Anon had fought her, she was only a shamble of what she once was. Yet with the messengers sending out their call to her, any version of her could respond. She could be the same shamble he once fought all that time ago, or she could be in her prime.

She was a hyperfocused person, doing all she could to hone in onto one specific thing. And when that thing was something that needed to be killed, she did it easily. Being her target like that, Anon knew that it would be a difficult fight between her and his possessed self.

Gehrman was now standing beside him, looking off into the infinity, his hand on Anon's shoulder. "Don't be scared."

"I'm not scared. Well, I'm not scared that I'm going to die. I'm scared that I'm rooting for myself to die."