Canterlot Detective Academy

by VampDash

Rating: mature
Tags: Violence, Death, Alternate Universe, Human, Narcotics, Twilight Sparkle, Drama, Trixie, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Mystery, Rainbow Dash, Rarity, Thriller, Moondancer
Length: 3894

Five friends join a prestigious college that has more secrets than meets the eye.

Twilight Sparkle was always a rather brilliant girl from a family of detectives. Her parents and brother wanted her to have the best teachers that could be offered. And few schools could be considered as excellent as the Canterlot Detective Academy. A school that had it's own.... rather eccentric past and teachers. However something about Canterlot has begun to smell fishy to her. Now with the help of her friends she seeks to solve the hidden mysteries of the school.... or die trying.

Co-Authored with the wonderful Alphamon_Ouryuken. You helped me find my spark dude. Thanks.

Published 2020-09-14 14:20:01 UTC
Last updated 2020-09-14 14:20:01 UTC

Chapter 1: The Day Lunch Struck Back

"WAIT! WAIT PLEASE! I'M ALMOST THERE!" A voice called out as a bus began lowering its stop sign at the bus stop. The person that called out was a girl around the ages of 15 and 16. She wore a dark lavender hoodie over a white shirt, a pair of black pants, and some white sneakers with lavender shoelaces and a six-pointed star on the side of them. As luck would have it she had just reached the doors in time and got on board as they began closing behind her. "S-sorry! My... my alarm clock was an hour behind!"

As Twilight caught her breath she made her way to the back of the bus, ignoring the rest of the gossiping students in favor of sitting next to a girl wearing a familiar star-patterned witch hat.

"Overslept again, eh Twi?" Trixie giggled.

"Y-yeah," Twilight said with a blush. "And almost on my first day too. God, how embarrassing would that be? Wouldn't need to be a detective to figure out I likely would've been kicked out by the school."

"Well, personally I think they would've made a big mistake. After all, SOMEONE has to match wits with me and make sure I don't just run the place by the end of my first year." She teased with an elbow to her ribs.

"Well, I'll be! A compliment from "the Great And Powerful Trrrrixie"!? Truly it must be the end times!" Third voice chimed in next to them in a melodramatic fashion, earning a giggle from Twilight.

"Hi Moonie." Twilight said as she saw her other friend sitting in the seat in front of them. "Isn't this exciting?! We're finally going to Stygian Detective Academy together!"

"Yeah it's cool girl but you also need to chill a bit. I mean you've only kept us both up to date how excited you are with only your CONSTANT updates on MyStable." Moondancer said as she adjusted her turtleneck and glasses. "I mean I was beginning to wonder if you had a bot set up to count down when the day would come."

"You can't prove anything." Twilight shot back with a joking glare before devolving into giggles.

"Suuuure we can't." Trixie giggled. "Anyway, I think it's more than important that we discuss the primary aspect of solving cases..."

"Of course, attention to detail and proper environmental analysis-" Moondancer began, only for Trixie to cut her off.

"Catchphrases." She stated firmly. "Any good detective with a decent nack for flare has one!"

"...really Trixie?"

"Yes! Do you really want to go to this school and NOT have an epic catchphrase to sound off your genius?!" Trixie asked as if Moondancer had been forced to say something she normally wouldn't.

"I think I can survive it. Look, the key thing they're looking for is the ability to pay attention to the case at hand. Not which hat am I gonna wear to my first day of school."

"Hey! This hat is my brand, my icon!" Trixie defensively pointed out. "After all, Sherlock had an awesome hat and everyone recognized him for it! It's only natural that I have both my very own catchphrase and an icon I want to cement my status as a Great Detective." She continued in an overly dramatic tone. "And besides, I already have my expert analysis at the ready at all times!"

"That's better than your usual method..... unless you're talking about that. In which case? A gut feeling isn't a great analysis method Trix!" Moon sniped at her.

"Oh yes, and how many times has my stomach led us astray?! Don't answer that!" Trixie shot out, noticing Moondancer was about to say something.

Twilight simply chuckled as she pulled out her phone, letting the two keep arguing...

As the bus doors opened, Twilight took a deep breath and stepped out, taking in the atmosphere of her new school... right before a blue blur crashed into her.

"WHOOPS! SORRY ABOUT THAT!" A rough and coarse voice said before Twilight heard a chuckle.

"It's... fine I guess." She groans as she begins picking herself up, along with her books and various notes. She then looked to where her assailant was at.

What she saw picking herself off the floor could be described as a delinquent at first glance. She had light-blue skin and long, rainbow-colored hair tied into a ponytail.

Her attire consisted of red sunglasses, a black belly top, dark blue wrist-length fingerless gloves with red spiked wristbands, a black biker jacket with light blue lightning bolts going down the elbow-length sleeves, deep blue knee-length denim shorts with a grey buckled-belt, and blue sneakers with red stripes.

"You okay?" The rainbow-haired girl asked as she held out a hand. "REALLY sorry about that. Just in a hurry but I mean I still could've paid better attention." A smile appeared on her face as she said this.

"It's fine. Seriously." Twilight said as she took her hand. The rainbow-haired girl chuckled nervously.

"Um, what class are you going to? I might be heading there myself." The girl asked while Twilight finally got up

"Oh me? Well, my first subject is area analysis, and you?" Twilight asked, theorizing that by her muscular build she'd most likely be in gym class.

"Sweet, I was just headed there myself!"

Wait, what?

"You're-" Twilight started before she was interrupted

"Excited about scanning the area? Heck yeah girl! Come on we're gonna be late!" Rainbow said with a perked up attitude before grabbing Twilight's arm and took off with her, Twilight holding the books on for dear life before being slingshotted over to her and trying to keep pace with her.

"So..." Twilight began, trying to strike up a more proper conversation as they entered the classroom. "Out of curiosity, why are you part of the area analysis class?"

"Why? I mean, for one thing, it gets me up and about while I'm not at Gym. And it also is vital since it helps you catch details you could miss when you examine the body alone." Rainbow said as she stretched a bit. "So that's my answer. What's yours?"

"Well... similar to yours actually. I mean minus the gym part." She replied, quickly correcting herself. "I mean, examining the crime scene is one of the most vital aspects, especially if the criminal is still in the area and the evidence is at risk of being tampered with... I've even been studying other methods, such as room temperature, the very landscape..."

"Yeah I get ya. Me? I just kinda notice things ya feel me?" Rainbow said as she adjusts her glasses. Twilight looked at her eyes at that moment and could see the fierceness behind them as well as the rather warm and encouraging magenta color. "Like.... okay promise not to spoil the fun? I got what I call Eagle Eyes. I can see some very impressive details in the landscape... and on people. You had butter toast and bacon for breakfast."

Twilight did a double-take. "How could you have possibly-"

"You mean besides your breath?" Rainbow interrupted with a coy smile. "Well for starters I noticed the trace amounts of oil on your fingertips earlier, plus the crumbs on the left side of your lips..."

"... that's... that's impressive!" Twilight said with a smile... before the teacher cleared their throat.

"Are you two done having a nice chat? Can I finally get on with my studies?" He said with a raised eyebrow. Twilight gulped and shrunk a bit.... before the teacher laughed. "Relax! I wasn't really mad at you two! I just... it's just a thing I like doing for the first years! Welcome to Area Analysis! I'm Professor Cord! Pleased to meet my new students!" He said as the rest of the class started chuckling as well.

Needless to say, the area analysis class was already proving to be quite the challenge. Apparently, Professor Cord's method of testing them consisted of putting the students into "controlled environments" where a murder and or theft had occurred. With their assignment being to properly assess exactly how said incident occurred within a certain time limit.

Surprisingly, Twilight and Rainbow had been placed on the same team, their environment being the main office of a mansion with the outline of a body on the floor and a missing diamond.

"Alright.... first we need a point of entry for the perp. How they could've gotten in and out." Rainbow said, mostly to herself as she had already begun looking around... at least Twilight thought she was. Her glasses made it kinda hard to see. "..... they were let in. The killer was let in because they were expecting them. The scuff marks around the floor near the door indicated as such and there doesn't seem to be a cracked open or jimmied open window in the room."

"...but according to the pamphlets we were given, none of the maids saw anyone exit the room..." Twilight added, reading through the minor details they were given. "Even if this was a private meeting, how did the killer escape unnoticed?"

"Y-yeah well... I-I mean one of them could've been like... I dunno. Busy doing something else and they didn't hear them?" Rainbow said while scratching the back of her head. "Or maybe they were like... bought off or something." She seemed just a bit embarrassed by that sudden question.

Twilight rolled her eyes at this. "Or... hear me out, there's another escape route we're not seeing?"

Rainbow arched a brow at this.

"I mean, think about it, who was the last person to enter the room before the murder?"

"The maid obviously because the owner had this place.... wiped.... clean and they would need an easy way to get out." Rainbow said with a smirk. "Girl that's genius! Alright, start looking for anything resembling scuff marks where there shouldn't be. It wouldn't matter how good of a cleaning she is, a maid can't clean up those kinds of scuff marks."

"...so what exactly tipped you off that the berries she grew were what she used to poison him?" Twilight asked as she and Rainbow exited the cafeteria and made their way to the outer dining area.

"The fact that the glass, while it seemed perfectly fine, still had a trace amount of Berry residue behind on it. Her particular Berries, Wild Thornberry, are known to be extremely lethal yet taste delicious." Rainbow said as she looked for an open seat. "Making it more tragic is that they're also an ingredient in Aphrodisiac Drugs. So poor guy got a fun going away present."

"Not bad, and we had minutes to spare..." Twilight smiled. "Though that begs the question-"

"Hey Twilight!" Trixie called out, getting her attention. Twilight quickly turned in the direction of the voice and saw her friends sitting with a lady with curly purple hair.

"OH! Hey over here!" Twilight said as she hurried over to the table, getting the seat closest to her friends. Rainbow however sat with the purple-haired girl. "Oh uh... girls this is Rainbow Dash. Rainbow Dash these are my close friends Moondancer and Trixie Lulamoon."

"Sweet. I take it you two met Rarity already?" Rainbow asked as Rarity smiles at Twilight.

"A pleasure to meet you Twilight." She smiled, shaking her hand. "I saw your performance in the analysis class, not bad for a first-timer."

"Ehehe... well I don't think I could've gotten all the details without Rainbow Dash." Twilight replied sheepishly.

"Ah yes. Her 'Eagle Eyes' helped out a bit hm?" Rarity asked as she giggled a bit. RD just blushed at the remark.

"Rares come on try and keep it a BIT of a secret. It's kinda not public."

"Right, right. Keeping your trump card close and all that..." Rarity smirked as she took a bite out of her sandwich.

"So Trixie, how'd you and Moondancer meet-" Twilight began, only to be interrupted by an anguished scream. The entire group turned to the source of the scream and saw a male student on the ground holding his stomach in pain.

"M-MY STOMACH! GOD, IT FEELS LIKE IT'S ON FIRE!" He yelled as he rolled in utter agony. "S-SOMEONE! PLEASE, SOMEONE, MAKE IT STOP!" He screamed... only for another student to start reacting the same way. On top of another and it kept adding up to at least 30 students in pure, gruesome, and agonizing pain.

"What the hell is going on!?" Trixie screamed as Moondancer, and a few other kids who weren't sick quickly pulled out their phones and called nine-one-one. "Is this some sort of epidemic?!"

Rarity quickly went over to the nearest kid and checked them over. "N-no this seems too localized. An epidemic would've been something MUCH worse-"

"Basically we'd ALL be acting the same way! Moonie is the call going out?!" Twilight asked as she dabbed a napkin on another kid's head.

"Y-yeah, they should be here soon-" Moondancer began, only to hear one of the students behind her throw up. "...hopefully faster..."

"God this is... this is horrifying!" Rarity said as she narrowly dodged another student upchucking. Soon outside the school, the sounds of sirens began getting closer. "Oh thank god the Ambulances are here!"

The group could only watch as their classmates were placed on stretchers before being wheeled into the ambulances gathered around the school.

"This is just... disturbing..." Moondancer whispered.

Rarity could only barely contain her horror and disgust at the scene. "It was just.... like a horrid symphony of terrible sounds. I think I'm going to have nightmares tonight."

"...try thenext six months..." Rainbow added as they saw various parents arriving at the school, a small chill going down her spine as she turned her attention to some of the unconscious students. "But... what could've caused all this?"

"The lunch people say it's possible that the food they got was closer to being out of date then usual. Though they do try to keep their standards high slight mistakes are possible." Twilight said as she looked over a sample piece of food from the lunch disaster.

"What the-you're looking at that right now?!" Trixie yelped in panic. "That's like... SUPER inappropriate right now!"

"In what way?" Twilight retorted matter of factly.

"It's... it's just... with everything happening it would be more sensible NOT to touch the puke-food!" Trixie groaned. "I mean, I know you're a glutton but come on!"

"I was just going to bag it for evidence you weirdo!" Twilight retorted, her eye twitching.

"...oh."

"And I'm grabbing the non-puked on food. Seriously Trixie how gross can you get?!" Twilight asked with a shiver up her spine. "I swear you always jump to the worst possible conclusion!"

"Can we FOCUS ladies!?" Moondancer snapped as she difference between the two, gesturing to some of the students being helped into the ambulances. "I think we've got bigger things to worry about it right now!"

"I know we have bigger concerns Moonie. But that's why I'm doing this." Twilight said as she finished collecting her evidence. "Next stop..... Analysis Lab..... after we hear what the teachers have to say about this incident."

""Spoiled Meat" my ass!" Trixie snapped as she stormed into the Analysis Lab alongside her friends. "Honestly, do they really think anyone is gonna but that lame excuse!?"

Moondancer shrugged. "To be fair, the last thing they need is a mass panic over a possible epidemic. Better that they at the very least make it sound like they can somewhat get things back under control instead..."

"Yeah but...... REALLY?! Spoiled meat?!" Trixie groaned as she sat down. "They might as well say it was Bad Tummy Aches!"

"Let's focus on the matter at hand, shall we?" Twilight stated as she quickly put on a lab coat and some rubber gloves before tying hair up in a bun. "It's time to analyze!" She proclaimed with a determined look on her face, casually pushing the glasses up, causing them to gleam ominously.

"Alright. Now let's begin!" She said dramatically as she pressed a button. "And while this is cooking we can examine the other materials I brought from there."

"I fucking knew she'd do it. I fucking told you Moon she brought barf with her!" Trixie said with fear. RD just raised an eyebrow as she saw what it was Twilight brought out.... a small bit from the returned foods as she began putting one under a microscope.

"..... okay first of all that’s metal as hell what you did. Second, what are you hoping to find?"

"It's simple." Twilight replied, adjusting her glasses once more. "By analyzing the food before and after consumption, we can not only properly determine whatever chemical caused this reaction, but also how long it takes to take effect as well as how traceable it is within the human body."

Rarity wants to smile... but she also feels faint just looking at the returned food. "Y-yes darling.... quite."

".... is this making you queasy? You would-"

"Darling I can stomach certain things. THAT horror you're looking at right now? NOT one of those things."

"Maaaybe you should wait outside if you're that squeamish." RD suggested in a concerned tone. "I mean, the last thing we need is another mess in the lab."

"Y-yes thank you." Rarity said as she started to vamoose out of the room. Twilight sighed.

"I just don't see what's got her all worked up. Honestly it's just science." She told her friends who all looked at her with exasperated faces.

"It's. VOMIT." Trixie stressed, her eye twitching. "You're basically inspecting someone's vomit!"

"It's for science!" Twilight protested, not taking her eyes off the device. "Unless you have a better way of inspecting these toxins..."

"Ugh.... I hate when she has a point." Trixie groans as she looks away. "Just.... say whenever you're done with your 'examination' you gross hobgoblin!" She retorted to Twilight who just shoots her a tongue sticking out.

"It's a dirty job, but someone's gotta do it..." She mumbled to herself as she started writing down notes. However, as she inspected the device again, a smile graced her features. "...and Bingo was his name-o!" She cheered as she quickly started writing more data down.

"What'd ya find?" Rainbow asked.

"Reverse Laxatives." Twilight said which made Trixie and Rainbow give her confused looks. Moondancer just rolled her eyes.

"What she means is that these things are designed so it dissolves once in the stomach." She says. "Am I close?"

"Mhm. They're really dangerous to ingest since an OD.... well-"

"I'm assuming that's when they literally puke their guts out?" Rainbow asked.

"Basically yes." Twilight explained and she started taking down more notes. "Granted, we have the method, but the motive still remains undiscovered..."

"...why would anyone want to give the entire School food poisoning?" Rarity asked in an uncertain tone, as she returned into the room looking much better. "Better yet, why do it in such a public manner?"

Cloudkicker could only pace around in her dorm. She knew the others would get sick but..... holy shit that many? "No.... no you should've told someone... should've made them reconsider or something!" She whisper yelled at herself. "Now how is this gonna look?! You should've.... no. Not should've. You still can. They'll likely kick you out but you'll do it with a clear conscience."

The sound of something clattering to the ground immediately caused her to jump as she turned around... only to see an overturned trash can. Cloudkicker breathed sigh of relief before reaching into her purse. "G-get together girl, y-you can still make this work..." She stammered, pulling out a small bottle full of pills and hastily opening it.

Once opened she tapped it to her side out fell the last two in that battle. "Thank god for that refill I got the other day... bottoms up." She whispered to herself as she popped them into her mouth. She then went to her bathroom and looked at herself in the mirror, showing a disheveled mess. "Ugh..... hmph..... alright.... no more fucking around. You go to the Principal and tell the truth." She said to herself. She then opened the window counter and grabbed her next full bottle of anxiety pills. She put them in her purse and closed the cabinet door.

The sound of something clattering to the ground immediately caused her to jump as she turned around... only to see an overturned trash can. Cloudkicker breathed sigh of relief before reaching into her purse. "G-get together girl, y-you can still make this work..." She stammered, pulling out a small bottle full of pills and hastily opening it.

Once opened she tapped it to her side out fell the last two in that battle. "Thank god for that refill I got the other day... bottoms up." She whispered to herself as she popped them into her mouth. She then went to her bathroom and looked at herself in the mirror, showing a disheveled mess. "Ugh..... hmph..... alright.... no more fucking around. You go to the Principal and tell the truth." She said to herself. She then opened the window counter and grabbed her next full bottle of anxiety pills. She put them in her purse and closed the cabinet door.

...it all happened in one single blur, she barely had enough time to react let alone scream.

A figure darted from behind her and quickly slammed their fist into her gut, knocking the wind out of her. Then in one swift motion they reached into her purse and yanked out her pills, ripping off the top of or shoving it into her mouth and forcing her head back, forcing her to swallow every single one.

They then shut her mouth close and pinned her to the ground. She struggled to fight back against the attacker but they were able to over power her. Her hand soon tried to pry open her mouth to force the pills back up but they kept her arm away with their knee. This kept up for a few minutes before the pills began to do their job a little too well. Making her mouth start to bubble and her world became blurry.... and soon dark.

The dim light of the room showed the killer if only for a brief moment. The figure wore a hastily put together disguise consisting of a long sleeve shirt, rubber gloves, and their face seemingly wrapped up in several bandages with only their eyes visible, which were obscured by a pair of goggles. After checking to make sure Cloud wasn’t going to respond they began ransacking the place as if looking for something. However nothing in the room seemed to stand out to them. Growling in anger the figure left through the still open door they stopped from closing earlier.

Author's Note

WOOHOO! It feels GOOD to be back in the game folks! I cannot promise a timely schedule for this but I promise you? This one isn't going anywhere and hopefully just the start of a new me!

Thank you so much Alphamon for helping me out editing and creating this first chapter. I can't wait for us to tackle the rest of this! In the meantime? Hope you all enjoyed this!