In Which Celestia and Luna Try to End Immortality's Reign Over Them
“Twilight, if there’s one thing I’ve learned in all my long years, it’s patience. I know you want this to be resolved quickly, but sometimes you just have to let it play out on its own time.” She demurely sipped her tea.
“But, Princess Celestia, there’s just so much…”
“Twilight, shh. Take a deep breath and let it out. Deep breath. And out. Better? Some things take time, my student. You can’t rush what can’t be rushed.”
“Okay. Thank you, Princess.”
Twilight hugged Celestia and bowed before flying off. Celestia smiled and waved until her protégé was out of sight and then turned away from the balcony and trudged into the darkness of her bedroom. She moped around for a few minutes before deciding to take a walk.
The day was bright, the birds were chirping, and the scent of summer wafted through the air. Her hooves clicked lethargically on the stone floor. She slouched as she entered the castle garden. Somewhere near a fountain she stopped and took a deep breath, inhaling the smell of flowers. Standing there listlessly, she lifted her head to the sky and watched a few wandering clouds roll by.
A burst of scorching pain erupted from her left eye and almost instantaneously her right. All went black. Her body went limp and she felt herself tipping over. Then she felt nothing.
A ghostly figure of the princess appeared and lazily floated in the garden. It looked down at a very dead white alicorn. It considered it. The dead alicorn lay on its side and looked like it was sleeping, if not for the arrow piercing its skull and the pool of blood slowly spreading beneath its head. The ghost alicorn nodded in acceptance. “Fair shot,” it mused.
It watched a midnight blue alicorn saunter over with a crossbow floating at her side. She nudged the dead alicorn with her hoof a few times. She looked at the ghost.
“Anything?”
“I’m afraid not. Still a ghost.”
“Drat.”
“Yes. It was a good shot, Luna,” Celestia conceded.
“Thank you. I’ve been practicing.”
“I appreciate the decision to go through both eyes.”
“Yes. I find the whole ‘shoot ‘em right between the eyes’ approach to be tedious and cliché. Fortunately, ponies’ skull structure allows for some creativity.”
“Quite. So, what’s the rest of your day look like?”
Luna shrugged. “Lounge, I suppose. Might read some comic books then turn in.”
“Very well. I’m going to float around the garden some and then be on my way.”
“Very good, sister. See you tomorrow.” Luna nodded and left the garden.
Celestia drifted around for a while, absently reveling in her diaphanous self. Eventually, she no longer felt interested in being there and dissipated into the early afternoon air.
18 days later
Celestia munched serenely on her pancakes. The morning sun had just crept over the horizon and the princess felt a calmness wash over her. A few morning birds chirped beyond the windows. The double door at the side of the breakfast hall opened and Luna trudged in, tired from her night’s work.
“Good morning, sister,” Celestia greeted brightly.
“I suppose,” Luna replied weakly.
“Rough night, huh?”
“I can deal with nightmares easily enough, I just can’t stand all the…romantic dreams, especially amongst the pubescent type. Ugh.”
“Sounds terrible.”
“It always is.”
“Well, have some breakfast with me before you turn in, won’t you?”
“Yes, I do feel a bit peckish.” Luna sat at the other end of the table and floated some nearby food her way. She munched absently and drank sparingly, careful not to overdo it. She conversed lightly with her sister for a few minutes. Suddenly, she stopped and a very worried look spread over her face.
“Is something wrong, Luna?” Celestia asked genuinely.
“I…uhh…” She coughed and winced in pain. She clutched her stomach and her body began to shake. She lurched forward, front hooves on the table, her eye wide with fear. Her body heaved and wretched, as though she were going to vomit. Her belly expanded rapidly. Blood spilled from her mouth and snout. Organs gurgled up her throat as her abdomen exploded, splattering the immediate area in blood, flesh, and other messy bits of pony. She collapsed on the table, a few organs plopping from her gaping maw. Her eyes stayed open but the life faded quickly, then she was no more.
Celestia stood from her chair and walked over to her newly departed sister. She inspected the carnage.
“Breakfast was never my favorite meal,” ghost Luna said, rising from the corpse.
“Which made it very difficult to pull this off. This was one of my first plans but I couldn’t be too eager. I had to wait so long.”
“I can imagine. Your patience is admirable. I would have been suspicious otherwise. By the way, you have some red on you.” She tapped her cheek.
“Oh, thank you.” She floated a napkin to her and produced a small mirror. “Do you think it too gruesome?” she asked, wiping the speck of blood from her face.
“A tad. Should the day come I actually do die, I hope it is with more dignity and I am found in a more…natural state.”
“Agreed. Well, I can cross that one off the checklist, at least. Your breakfasts shall be poison-free from now on.”
“Very good. In which item was the poison hidden?” Luna inquired, scanning the bloodied food.
“All of it.”
“Good thinking. Welp, on that note, I believe I shall take to haunting the library. I hear a group of our more studious citizens are convening there and I’d like to have some fun with them.”
Celestia giggled. “Very well. Enjoy.”
Luna floated off and Celestia went back to her breakfast.
5 days later
Luna glided down the hallway, careful not to touch the floor. Celestia was a light sleeper and Luna needed her to remain asleep. She reached Celestia’s room and silently jimmied the lock. With practiced patience, she opened and closed the door without a sound. With masterful stealth, she reached Celestia’s bed to find the princess sleeping soundly.
Gently she placed a magic dampener on Celestia’s horn. With the care of an archeologist moving a fragile ancient artifact, she tied with silken ropes all four of Celestia’s hooves to the corresponding bedposts. She straddled her sister’s waist and quickly inspected her work. It would have to do. She produced a jagged 10-inch knife and plunged it into the middle of her sister’s chest.
Celestia woke up screaming in agony, much to the dismay of Luna, who was sawing open Celestia’s midsection. While Luna had hoped the incision would have been a straight one, Celestia’s thrashing about caused the knife to take an indirect path downward. Having finally made a long enough cut, Luna used her magic to pull open the flesh, exposing the innards of Celestia. Luna plucked an organ from the hole, using the knife to severe its ties. She inspected it, as though she was conducting research.
Celestia could barely see through the tears and blinding pain but she still watched helplessly as her sister methodically removed organ after organ. Blood pooled on the bed, ruining the sheets, which only added to Celestia’s pain.
Having removed most organs, Luna watched as her sister began to twitch and shake, no longer capable of squirming around. With her hoof she reached into the chest cavity, behind the lungs to the heart. With a yank she removed the heart and placed it on Celestia’s chest. The eyes of the sun princess began to close, staring at the heart in front of her as it stopped beating. Just as she was about to lose consciousness she saw Luna lean forward with the knife and felt the cold blade slice across her throat.
Luna relaxed and climbed off her sister and out of the bed.
“Does somepony have some pent-up aggressions?” Celestia’s ghost asked, floating to the other side of the bed.
“Maybe,” Luna shrugged. “It just came to me.”
“It honestly looks like a crime scene out of a detective novel or something.”
“Yes, it does, doesn’t it? Huh, I never planned that. What a wonderful surprise!”
“Admittedly, I am a bit concerned about your method. I think you may have enjoyed that too much. Anything you wish to discuss?”
Luna gave it some thought and sighed. “Perhaps it was…emulation. Subconscious emulation. Too many hours reading about serial killers, I suppose. It won’t happen again.”
“No judgment on my part, just as long as you keep it between us.”
“Yes, of course.”
A silence fell over the room as they gazed at the dead body.
“Still on dream patrol tonight?” asked Celestia.
“Hmm? Oh, yes. I’ll keep it light, maybe a dozen or so.”
“Alright then. I guess I’ll just float around here until midnight.” She looked at her grandfather clock. “Won’t be too long.”
“Okay. Sweet dreams, sister. See you in the morning.”
The next day
Luna sat on the wicker lounger reading an article in a magazine about the latest shakeup in numismatics. She idly sipped on some tea and was actually enjoying the hazy sunlight through thick cirrus clouds. The soft patter of hooves told her Celestia was approaching.
“Good evening, sister,” Celestia chimed.
“Yes, it is.”
“Watcha reading?” Celestia sidled up next to Luna. “Ah,” Celestia said, feigning interest when she read the headline. She waited for Luna to finish reading. “Sister, what’s on your mind?”
“How did you know?”
“You’re reading about numismatics. You always turn to currency when something is bothering you.”
“Yes,” she sighed, “despite my brief entanglement with the pleasures of butchery, I find myself no more content or placated. I am only more convinced we will persist throughout the ages. The thought leaves me…unsettled.”
“I understand.” She hugged her sister, nuzzling her cheek.
“With each attempt I feel the act becomes more futile. If a thousand years on the moon didn’t kill me, I don’t know what will.”
“Yes, I thought surely that would have worked.”
“You interrupted my turn when you did that.”
“Yes, I apologized for that.”
A brief silence followed. “Does Cadance know?”
“Yes. I told her a few years ago. She’s killing Flurry nearly once a week now. Shining Armor has also agreed to participate, usually in retaliation for when she kills Flurry. Or sometimes during their amorous activities.”
“They are truly the paragon of familial love and loyalty.”
“Mm-hmm.”
“Does Twilight know?”
“Goodness, no. You know she’s not…mentally ready for that kind of revelation.”
“Yes, of course.” Another brief silence. “Do you think we’ll ever find a way?”
“We have to die sometime, Luna. I’m sure we’ll figure it out.” She shifted a bit, moving her cheek down Luna’s neck, nuzzling a bit as she went. In an abrupt motion, she dipped her chin and thrust upwards, her horn piercing near the top of Luna’s throat. With a little more effort her horn pushed through the top of Luna’s skull. Luna struggled, her front legs kicked out, trying to find purchase as Celestia lifted her a bit. Blood trickled down Celestia’s horn, dripping every which way off her face. “We just have to keep trying, dear sister.” Luna made a weak gurgling noise before her body went limp. The soft patter of blood dripping on the floor echoed throughout. “We just have to keep trying.”
