Rainbows and Apples

by Chaotic Discord

First published August 29th, 2012 12:14

OH. MY. GOD. BECKY. LOOK. AT. HER. BUTT.
Those were the last words of Will Short, the weird kid at my school with Pizza Face Syndrome.
On a lovely day, Rainbow Dash falls in love with Big Mac for no reason.
Ice Cream.
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This was a one shot. Don't expect any other chapters.

Chapters

Fluttershy is a Meatball

Fluttershy is a Meatball
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Rainbows and Apples

Fluttershy is a Meatball

"Oh, Macky, I love you," Rainbow whispered as she pressed her lips against Big Mac's.

So you wonder how things got this way, huh? Well too bad. Here goes.

On Spring Summer's day, the sun was shining and the sky was full of clouds. It was also raining. And snowing. At the same time. The rain was chocolate milk and lemonade, and Pinkie Pie was taking it all for herself. Applejack was eating pink-flavored apples, and Rarity hooked up with Tom, and Lily was there for no apparent reason. She was crying because the scene traumatized her.

Discord was in the sky, laughing his butt off, because he didn't give a flying feather.

And Lily was crying even though she was already crying, and Sandy was crying, so that was good.

Rarity came over and said, "Of all the worst things, this is THE. WORST. POSSIBLE. THING!!" And started making out with Tom again.

And then Lily started crying again. For the third time.

And Applejack came over and boomed, "OMG GUYS, WHUT R U DOIN" And Pinkie Pie threw a party. Because that's what she does best.

A bucket filled with rainbow milk that tasted like waffles fell on Lyra's head. And Pinkie Pie ran away screaming.

And Twilight Sparkle started raining from the sky. And no matter how many times she hit the ground, she would start raining again. Lily tried to catch her, but failed miserably, because she is an Oddish.

Then Rainbow Dash drank a monster, and bounced off the walls. And the celling. And the clouds. And Twilight Sparkle. Vinyl Scratch ran in and yelled, "LET'S SPIN THIS SH*T"

And then Sandy ran around screaming, "WHY WOULD YOU HURT TWILIGHT SPARKLE?????!!!!!"

Rainbow Dash yelled, "WHERE'S MY ENERGY DRINK"

Then Pinkie Pie ran across the street and was like, "WHERE'S GUMMY?" And he started raining from the sky.

And then Big Mac came and ate Rainbow's tail. "NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN"

"Big Mac, what are you doing? Rainbow blushed.

Then Discord floated down. "Now, children, kiss!" He pushed their heads together, pressing their lips in beautiful bliss.

Then Gummy came and hit him on the head with a lunch tray.

Heaven the drunkard came tumbling in and hit Twilight Sparkle, which made a crater in the earth. Which soon was filled with chocolate milk.

Then Fluttershy came trotting in at a very fast pace. She was very worried. "Oh my, where is my meatball? I've been looking for it everywhere!"

Then spaghetti sprung out of his pockets. "Uh..."

Rainbow Dash started crying at the very thought that Big Mac would steal anything of Fluttershy's. "Big Mac how could you do this to me? I though you loved me!"

Then Pinkie Pie popped out with a butcher knife. "I know what to do with Big Mac!"

Rainbow Dash screamed. "Pinkie, don't make him into cupcakes!"

Meanwhile...

After about five minutes, Fluttershy found her beloved meatball. After snuggling with it for the next 20 seconds, Discord came and kissed on the cheek and took her meatball. Fluttershy was devastated. She would never see her meatball again. After thinking that over, she burst into flames. Because that's what ponies do when they get angry. Fun!

Back to Big Mac!

Pinkie Pie responded. "That's okay, because I wasn't planning on doing that!" Her knife turned into a magic wand, and tapped Big Macintosh on the flank, for no reason. His cutie mark almost instantly turned into a meatball.

"Well, that wasn't so bad," Big Macintosh said.

Then he became a meatball. Because his cutie mark implied so.

Rainbow Dash screamed.

"Now we can take this to Fluttershy and make her happy!" Pinkie squealed.

"Great idea!" Rainbow giggled in reply.

They turned into humans and sprinted to the spot where they thought Fluttershy was."She's gone! She turned to ashes!"

"She must have gotten angry."

Soon they heard Godzilla in the distance. "MY MEATBALL!!!!!!!!!"

Godzilla soon tromped in front of the two ponies, with Discord riding on his back. "Tally ho!" He boomed, while taking a sip of orange juice. They headed off to battle against Princess Trollestia and the pineapples.
And then Fluttershy headed off to go take a shower, even though she probably wouldn't be able to fit, considering she was still Godzilla.

Then Heaven and Twilight Sparkle had a rap battle, where Heaven claimed that the only thing Twilight Sparkle could wrap was a burrito. It turned her assumptions were correct.

Overhearing them, Fluttershy was struck with an idea. If Twilight Sparkle could wrap a burrito, why couldn't she?! She decided to open a mexican restaurant with her beloved meatball, to earn money on the side for her animals, and share her Mexican joy with the world.

Then suddenly Rainbow Dash popped in and was all like, "You're Mexican Fluttershy?!"

And Fluttershy responded, "No, silly, I'm Russian!"

"Yes!" Heaven cried, and they brohoofed triumphantly.

Discord

Discord was watching the current series of events, and was laughing his butt off, like usual. At this point, Discord had been victorious over Trollestia. Since Fluttershy left to go make burritos, he was on his own. At the battlefield, Trollestia shouted, "No, my pineapples!" And they turned into Pina Coladas.

That still didn't change the fact that she was a jerk.

So Trollestia whipped out her cannon and screamed, "TO THE MOON," only to find that there was nopony to shoot to the moon. Which made her very sad. So she cried for several minutes while Discord comforted her.

Then they made out. It made Trollestia feel much better. Since she felt true love for Discord, she decided that Equestria should feel love too. So everypony in Equestria started making out, including Big Mac and Rainbow Dash.

"Oh, Macky, I love you," Rainbow whispered as she pressed her lips against Big Mac's.

DUN DUN DUNNNN

Oh yeah, and Discord slapped Candace because she was jealous. Dumb Fangirl.

Ali went to Discord and said, "Oh no you di'in't, don't do that again, or I'll hurt you badly."

So Discord slapped Candace in the face again.

And Ali kicked a hole in the roof.

"Oh, no, my roof," Discord shouted.

"Oh no, my meatball," Fluttershy cried. Then she fell of the rood and Ali caught her before she landed with a loud THUD.

Candace kissed Discord straight on the lips and ran away screaming. Then Trollestia called up Queen Chrysalis and teamed up with her to go kill Candace.

They came after Candace with Changelings that were pineapples, and pineapples that were changelings.

{THE END}