"My name is Kevin, and I'm twenty-two years old. Walking home one night, some ^($&er called The Creator sucked me into some sugar-bowl hellhole called Equestria, full of talking magical *#$^ing ponies. I mean, what the hell man. I must be ^&$^ing cooky."

Warning:
If cursing, glaring stereotypes, and total disrespect for anything and/or anyone in the name of mockery offends you, this aint the story for you.