That's a lot of damage!

by The_Chill_Author

Rating: teen
Tags: Violence, Slice of Life, Crossover, Death, Human, Twilight Sparkle, Gore, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Alternate Universe, Tirek, Comedy, Random
Length: 1140

Twilight Sparkle is on her last limb fighting Tirek, the fight lasted for a few minutes. But when Twilight is nearing her limit, an unexpected hero arrives, Phil Swift, you can only imagine where this is going.

Phil Swift when he is the most leading brand for tape on earth he decides to go to Equestria, finding that everything is destroyed, he will repair it with the power of Flex Tape.

Idea by Steakhog. So... Yeah.

We have audio brought to you by Hugmir! Ya can give it a read right here!

Published 2020-10-23 00:20:00 UTC
Last updated 2020-10-23 00:20:00 UTC

How about a little more?

Twilight crashed through a rocky terrain which was now what was left of Ponyville, the trees burnt, houses crushed, thankfully everypony evacuated. Twilight stumbled to get up, she had double vision and couldn't see what was in front of her. She saw the centaur, Tirek, the one who did all of this, the one who destroyed Ponyville! Twilight pushed up to a position where she could attack. Tirek laughed.

"It's over Twilight Sparkle! I have the power of all of Equestria, including Discord's and your friends. It's over." His voice racked Twilight's brain, she could barely stand let alone fight, but fight she would, she needed to stall more, just a little more and somepony, somepony out there might save her. Will they?

"You may have all the magic in Equestria but I have one thing you don't, Friendship!" Twilight ran at Tirek charging up one more Alicorn blast, she shot with all her Alicorn might. Tirek made a magic shield, shielding from Twilight's attack. Tirek was getting pushed back, Twilight pushed forward, Tirek saw this and laughed pushing forward as well. As they pushed on towards each other, Twilight's concentration was fading as a migraine took over, she groaned as she stopped pushing forward. Tirek smiled and pushed on forward, they were now three feet away from each other. The centaur charged up a powerful red hot magical blast that would surely injure her to the point of not walking anymore. She closed her eyes and shouted.

"Someppony, please! Help me!" And help came as Tirek was thrown back into house rubble. She looked at her savior, it was a human, she smiled and passed out due to exhaustion. There is Phil Swift, the most powerful being on earth and now in Equestria. Tirek blasted himself out of the rubble and looked at Phil Swift. Phil Swift had his normal uniform on but he had weapons, a sledgehammer, a combat knife, and a chainsaw, he also had some Flex Tape, Flex Paste, Flex Seal Liquid, Flex Shot, and every single color variant of Flex Tape. Tirek glared at Phil Swift who was looking around at the destruction.

"Who are you? Well, it doesn't matter, because soon you will be a corpse!" Tirek blasted at Phil Swift who stood there crossing his arms. He was seemingly hit, Tirek saw nothing but dust and he laughed, the dust cleared and a protective sphere of Flex Seal Liquid covered him, it disappeared and went back into its bucket. Yeah, a bucket was on him and he isn't being slowed down.

"Flex Seal Liquid has a new exciting feature, weaponizing! That's right, you can get yours for 14.99 on FlexSeal.com!" Phil Swift lifted up the bucket. Tirek growled as Phil Swift, taking his advertising as an insult, he shot another fiery blast at Phil Swift, the Flex Seal Liquid easily shielding Phil Swift from the attack. "It also had another exciting feature, transportation!" The Flex Seal Liquid went out of the bucket and to Phil Swift's legs, it pushed him close to Tirek, Phil Swift got out his sledgehammer and hit Tirek's face in. Tirek was launched into more rubble. "That's a lot of damage!" Phil Swift smiled, "How about a little more?" Phil Swift had Flex Tape, he lassoed it around Tirek and spun him around and threw him into the Golden Oak Library wreckage. "Now that's a lot of damage!" Phil Swift's voice boomed. Tirek flew up and roared in anger.

"That is it, you're dead!" Tirek spoke through his teeth.

"But I'm not dead right now am I?" Phil Swift grinned.

Tirek's eyes were burning with anger as he lets out a furious bellow and tries to ram into Phil Swift. The Flex Seal Liquid stopped him and made his bounce up into the sky. The Flex Seal Liquid turned into rockets and shot up and chased after Tirek, Tirek was thirty feet into the air and he looked down, there were the rockets. Tirek blasted away at full speed trying to evade the rockets, he looked back and they were tailing him! They blasted off at full speed and crashed into Tirek, the Flex Seal Liquid missiles were now Flex Tape as they wrapped around Tirek. Tirek fell into the White Tail Woods, Tirek tried to rip the Flex Seal Liquid off of him but was completely immobilized. Phil Swift was in front of Tirek, Tirek yelped.

"How did you get here so fast?!" Tirek demanded, he was in no position to demand anything but even still Phil Swift answered.

"With the power of Flex Tape!" Phil Swift stood proud with hands on his hips, all with a huge grin on his face. Tirek grunted in effort as he tried to rip his Flex Tape Liquid prison apart. Tirek looked up at Phil Swift, he was on his side.

"Let me free!" Tirek demanded once more, Phil Swift shook his head.

"I will let you free when I do this!" Phil Swift snapped his fingers and the destruction caused by Twilight and Tirek's battle faded away. Tirek's jaw dropped.

"And with the power of Flex Tape, I fixed what this horrible battle caused! But that's not all," Tirek felt his energy drain from his body, his muscles shrinking into twig-like arms, he now looked malnourished. "I gave back all the magic you stole!" Phil Swift smiled, Tirek now knew what the power of Flex Seal was... It is horrifying! Phil Swift brought out his chainsaw and turned it on. Phil Swift's smile grew wider.

"This is going to be too much damage!" Phil Swift laughed, as he walked closer to Tirek, the look of horror on Tirek's face was one of sheer horror. Phil Swift raised the chainsaw high.

VVVVRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Author's Note

Bloopers

Some bloopers in the process of making "That's a lot of damage"

"You may have all the magic in Equestria but I have one thing you don't, F-" Twilight was interrupted.

"Flex Tape!" Phil Swift came in and everyone on set started to bust out laughing.

"P-Phil, y-you're not supposed to make an appearance until later," I said covering my face with my right hand.

"Oh, sorry." Phil Swift laughed as Tirek and Twilight fall down laughing.

Take 2

"You may have all the magic in Equestria but I have one thing you don't, F-" Twilight was interrupted yet again.

"Stupidity?" Tirek asked, everyone on the set laughed again.

"No, I have Alicorn Magic," Twilight said, Tirek smiled.

"I have a Nappa." Out of nowhere Nappa came on set and tackled Twilight to the ground. Everyone erupted with laughter.

"God damn it, Nappa!" I said trying to get myself together, tears of pure joy fell from my face as I fall off my director chair.

"Cut!"