Discord, Spike, and Big Mac Eat the World's Hottest Chip
It was Nightmare Night once again as everyone was dressed up in their costumes, setting up decorations and getting ready to trick or treat or heading over to the middle of Ponyville for the big party. As always it was one of their biggest traditions and most well-loved celebrations of the year.
Spike walked out into the throne room and sat on the throne that had Twilight's cutie mark on it. Normally he would dress up in his typical dragon costume but for this occasion, he was wearing a pirate costume. There was a reason for that. There was also a small bag that was laying on the table along with a camcorder right next to it.
Twilight walked into the throne room as if she was looking for someone when she spotted Spike sitting down. “Hey, you ready to go? Everypony else is ready.”
“I'm sorry. I'm just waiting on a few friends there's some that we wanted to do. They're just taking longer than I thought.”
“You mean Big Mac and Discord?” Twilight asked. He nodded. “Want me to wait with you?”
“Nah that's fine. Go on without me. I'll meet you there,” He assured her.
“You sure? It's almost time for the party?”
“The party doesn’t start for another hour, Twilight,” Spike corrected.
She rolled her eyes a little. “Alright then. If you’re sure.” She started heading out.
“Don’t worry. I'll be there.”
“Just stay out of trouble,” she called out as she made her way out of the room.
He smirked as he thought about the items that were in the bag. “A little too late for that,” he whispered.
As if on cue, Big Mac then entered into the room, also wearing a pirate costume. “Coast clear?”
“For an hour at least. Better than nothing, right?”
“Eyep.”
“Discord should be here with Luna in a few minutes,” Spike said. “For now we wait.”
They both stared at the bag. At first with excitement then with mixed emotions. “You sure we're not going to regret this?”
“Nope.”
“Don't worry we can’t die…I think.” Spike started to shake a little as his nerves started getting to him. “ I don't know about this…”
“Don't tell me you're backing out now.” A voice echo throughout the room. Big Mac and Spike immediately knew who it was.
Discord then suddenly appeared on the table bright light started flashing around him as if the paparazzi were taking photos of him. Just like Big Mac and Spike, he too was wearing a pirate outfit. He started making poses as he threw his sword in the air and started swinging it around.
Luna stood by the doorway and rolled her eyes in annoyance.
“That would just be disappointing,” He said as the flashing lights started to die down.
Spike crossed his arms. “No of course not.”
“Good. I wouldn't want to think I won before the competition even started.”
“Don't get too cocky just yet. from what I heard, this isn't going to be as easy as you want to think it is.”
“I guess we’ll see then,” Discord bloomed with confidence.
“I guess we will,” Spike agreed.
“Eyup.”
“And as I promised,” Discord began as he pointed at Luna. “I brought a cameraman and a second pair of eyes just in case things go terribly wrong.”
Luna trotted in. “Are you all wearing similar costumes?”
“We're doing one of those group costume things and also to see who will be the “captain” of this challenge,” Spike explained. “It's meant to be a joke.”
“Right.” She turned to Discord. “For the record, I only agreed to this just so I can watch you suffer.”
“That's really nice of you, Luna. I'm touched really,” Discord mocked. “For a moment there, I thought you actually cared.”
“I never said I didn’t. I'm just going to have the pleasure of laughing at this. I mean, you did ask for this. Of course, I'm going to take advantage of this moment,” she chuckled.
Discord then groaned. “Fine whatever. Can we just get started already?”
“Sure. I have to ask though. Why did you want us to do this without Twilight and her friends around?” Luna then asked.
“Honestly, cuz I know Twilight would have done everything in her power to make sure I didn't do this,” Spike said.
“I see. But can you really blame her?” Luna asked.
“Nope.”
“And why am I here?”
“Well, one you owe me,” Discord stated. “And secondly, We need someone to keep track of time and to make sure that none of us dies.”
“Also, we kind of wanted to see our reactions after this. And Rainbow Dash and a few others got a hold of this and wanted to see it too.”
“Alright then. Can you now explain to me out of all the things you could be doing on this night, this is what you are doing?”
“Well we've been thinking about doing this challenge for a while and we thought what better way to spend Nightmare Night than trying this,” Discord answered.
“I could think of a million things. But why is one of them eating the world's spiciest chip? I just don't understand the point of it,” Luna asked again.
“The point is just to see if you can handle it or not. Only the toughest and bravest of creatures can do this,” Spike stated proudly.
“Could also be the unwisest,” Luna countered.
“Most likely but I already paid a lot of bits for these so no going back now.”
It was time to start. The camcorder was set up and was recording everything.
They all sat around the table. Luna sat a grocery bag down and started pulling some of the items onto the table. At the same time, so Spike pulled out what was in his bag which revealed to be three coffin shape red boxes with a skull on it. The skull’s mouth was open and in it was in three bold white letter words: ONE CHIP CHALLENGE. Spike handed one over to Discord and the other to Big Mac.
“I brought what you asked, Spike.” She sat down three gallons of milk, 3 empty cups, a small jar of peanut butter, and bread along with a pocket watch. “I still think this is not a good idea.”
Discord picked it up and turned it around and began reading the back of the box. “Warning: do not eat if you are sensitive to spicy food, allergic to peppers, or pregnant or have any medical conditions. Keep Out Of Reach of children. After touching the chip, wash your hands with soap and do not touch your eyes or other sensitive areas. Seek a medical assistant should you experience difficulties breathing space or extended nausea. The reaper shows no mercy.”
Luna's eyes widened in shock as she heard what was being read to her. ”Are you sure this is safe?”
“That's what you're here. Just in case it's not,” Discord cheerfully implied.
“But even then, are you sure this is safe?”
“Nope,” Big Mac said in a low voice.
“Apparently it was made with the hottest peppers of all of Equestria & beyond. All put together in this tiny little chip.” He pulled out a small little black package in which the chip contained inside. “I present to you princess, the hottest chip in the world, The Reaper Pepper.”
Spike then opened up the box and inside was a small pamphlet. He pulled it out and opened it to read what was said inside. It read: Do you dare go head to head with the Reaper?
Spike read, ”Rules for the challenge: 1. Eat the entire chip. 2. Wait as long as possible before drinking or eating anything. 3. Film your reaction and show it off to your friends. Sounds simple enough.”
“Yup,” Big Mac agreed.
Spike flipped a pamphlet on the other side. It had a picture of a meter with different time stamps on it which had a different label on each of the timestamps. “According to this, we are in the featherweight after 5 minutes. Lightweight after 10 minutes. Middleweight after 30 and heavyweight if we make it an hour without eating or drinking anything.”
A moment passed them before their realization hit them all. “30 minutes? Discord, how long is the spice supposed to last?” Spike cried.
“Some say it can last up to 2 hours.”
“2 hours?!” Spike yelled.
“Maybe it won’t be that bad.”
“It better not be,” Spike snapped.
They grabbed the small little black package and ripped it from the top. They then each carefully pulled out the one piece of chip. It was a black chip cover with black flacks. Spike took a small sniff of it before backing away from it, disgusted. Discord noticed some of the dusty flakes on the chip got on his paw. Out of curiosity, he took a small taste of it.
The others watch his reaction. At first, he seemed confused but then quickly his eyes widen in Surprise. “Oh boy...this is going to be bad.”
“Yep, this is it. We’re going to die.”
“Definitely. So how are we doing this? Are we seeing who can last the longest or seeing how far we can go?” Discord asked.
“I say who can last the longest,” Spike suggested.
“Okay, sounds good,” Discord agreed.
“Yup.”
“So what does the winner get then?” Luna asked.
The three of them looked at each other for a moment as they thought about it.
“I got it. I win I get to choose what we get to do on the next guy's night,” Discord spoke first. Spike and Big Mac looked at each other before nodding.
“Okay. We can do that,” Spike said.
“Great. Cuz I got some big plans in mind,” Discord laughed with an evil grin.
Spike began to get worried. “Big Mac, we can't let him win.”
“Eyup.”
“And if I win?” Spike then asked.
Discord snapped his claw. “You win and I'll give you a month supply of gems directly from the Crystal Empire.”
“Deal.”
Discord looked over at Big Mac. “Now what do you want?”
Big Mac shrugged. “I don’t know.”
There was a moment of silence.
“Hey,” Luna called out from behind the camcorder. “If you win, I'll tell my sister to give you a ticket to the next Grand Galloping Gala up so you can take your girlfriend.”
Big Mac’s eyes immediately lit up causing Spike and Discord to laugh. “I think he likes that,” Discord joked.
“Alright I think it's time we actually ate it,” Spike chuckled guiltily.
“Yeah, I think we've been stalling long enough,” Discord said. “Oh by the way, I can somewhat still feel the spice in my mouth by that tiny piece of flake.”
Spike gulped. “Please don’t say that.”
“Don’t worry guys, I believe in you,” Luna tried to encourage them.
“Shut up and start the clock,” Discord groaned. They all took one final breath as they all grabbed the chip.
“Fine,” she snapped. “When you're ready to give up, just let me know and I'll hand you one of the items.”
“On three,” Spike said.
“One...two…
THREE.”
They close their eyes and shoved the chip in their mouth and began chewing. Discord and Big Mac took it slower as Spike did his best to quickly swallow it down.
“Man, it is dry,” Discord said as he kept on chewing.
Within seconds, the spice hit their tongues and the back of their throats. Spike started gagging. Big Mac’s mouth began to fill with saliva as it was getting harder to keep swallowing. He frantically looking for a place to spit, almost considering just spit on the floor or the table.
Luna saw this. “Wait, don't spit on the table.” She quickly grabbed one of the cups and passed it to him. He immediately spit into a cup. “I almost thought they were for the milk.”
“Yeah, i-it h-hits you all at o-once. It is hot,” Discord gasped. He started bouncing up and down his seat. Big Mac spitted in the cup again.
“You going to cry?” Luna joked.
“No!” Discord snapped. “But it’s hot.”
Spike got up from his seat and began pacing back and forth. “It’s getting worse. I need to move.”
“Nope! Nope! Nope!” Big Mac cried.
Luna couldn’t help but laugh a little. “Anyone wants a drink?”
“No! I am the Lord Of Choas! I will Conquer the pain!” Discord shouted.
The pain had an unpleasant warmth to it, eating at Discord’s stomach. There was nausea too, just enough to make him hold onto the table for support and breath slow. He often was able to ignore the pain, but that just isn't possible right now. At that moment, it owned Discord; dominates every thought, and controls every action he had.
Pain sears through Spike’s abdomen and tongue better than a branding iron. His mind conceding to the torment, unable to bring a thought to completion. All he could do was breathe heavily with small gasps as he tried to ignore the burning in the pit of his abdomen and his tongue. But all the while the pain burns and radiated so he was very much unsuccessful. He couldn't tell if his tongue was on fire or if it was being poked on by a million needles over and over and over again without ever stopping.
Every thought Big Mac had became confused as the burning pain licked up his back like a scorching fire. The only thoughts he had was 'like a knife through butter.' Big Mac grabbed the cup and spit some more. To him it wasn’t sharp like needlepoint or a knife, it burned around his throat better than boiling water. Everything felt scolded and, move or not, was in more pain than the second before. He coughed really hard which only caused his throat to burn more.
Luna stood up as she was starting to get more concern. “You okay?”
“It's...getting... harder...to talk. It...getting... harder...to breathe,” Spike was barely able to get out. He was forced to take big deep breaths so he could at least breathe a little.
“Y-yeah, b-breathing is horrible,” Discord agreed as he gagged.
“Y-yup.” Big Mac slammed his head on the table.
“Still want to keep going?” Luna had the milk ready.
“N-not yet,” Spike grunted.
“Why did you do this?” But she knew none of them would be able to answer.
Big Mac’s throat gurgled as he struggled to breathe, spitting into the cup. His body was shaking, slowly breathing hard. He dragged himself into a sitting position hand clutching his stomach. Once again, he spat in the cup.
Soon they were all just slouching on their chairs taking small breaths as they allowed the minutes to go by.
Eventually, Discord was the first to stand up. “Okay. I think we hit the plateau.”
“Y-yup...no w-way it can get worse,” Big Mac breathed heavily.
Luna looked down at the pocket watch. “10 minutes.”
“H-hey. We passed the featherweight,” Spike beamed causing Luna to chuckled.
Discord groaned as he grabbed his stomach. “Honestly, the only problem right now is my stomach. It hurts really bad.”
“It’s my tongue for me,” Spike said.
“Not gonna lie. That was definitely the hottest thing I have ever eaten in my hundreds of years of existing.”
“I believe it…” Big mac laid his head on the table.
“It still hurts. If we wanted to push ourselves we could but really we just want to throw in the towel,” Spike explained.
“I mean, my throat is still burning but I can actually handle this,” Discord said. “I'm not even trying to be boastful or anything.”
“Yeah, I could deal with this,” Spike nodded.
“Well, someone has to win,” Luna pointed out. “So until one of you drinks or eats anything you guys have to stay like this.”
They groaned loudly. It all came down to who was going to be willing to call it quits.
A few more minutes passed.
“It’s been 13 minutes,” Luna spoke up. “You are handling this much better than I first anticipated you all would. I have to say I am very impressed.”
“That...that’s the point,” Spike laughed, sightly hurting his throat.
“So you are okay now?” Luna asked confused.
“Nope,” They all said in unison.
No one said anything and all that was left was silence for a few moments.
“15 minutes,” Luna announced.
Still, none of them said anything. They all gave each other a small look as they pleaded with one another in their eyes for the other to just give up. She then got surprised when one of them motioned to her to hand him one of the gallons of milk.
“You’ll lose the bet. Are you-”
“Just give it to me,” he interrupted. With her magic, she passed him the milk. He quickly grabbed it and opened it. “I'm doing this because I love you guys.” He started chugging down the milk.
“I don’t think you should drink it so fast. You could upset your stomach even more,” Luna said.
Discord jumped a little in joy and laughed.
“Record this Luna. He took the first drink. He’s out.”
“I am aware of that, Discord.”
“I don’t care!” Spike spat out. He took another drink of milk. He grabbed the bread and started eating a piece, hoping it would help.
“Well, I think you should.”
“Why?” Spike asked.
“Because...Because...-” he stopped as he thought to himself. “Actually, screw this. I don't care anymore either. Luna, hand me the peanut butter and milk.” Discord never drank anything so fast in his life.
Luna was a little surprised but said: “I guess that means Big Mac wins. You lasted 16 minutes.”
He weakly through a hoof in the air. “y-yea.”
“Congrats Big Mac. How does it feel?” Spike said.
Big Mac groaned as he started taking small sips of the milk before spitting it back into the cup.
“The real prize wasn’t winning. It was losing.”
Luna and Discord laughed at that. “I'm saying this as a friend but this was possibly the dumbest thing you all have done ever?”
“We're not saying you're wrong?” Discord smiled.
“However, I must admit that I am impressed that you were all you able to do this. I must say you handled this quite well,” Luna added as she handed him back the camcorder. “Happy Nightmare Night.”
She gave one last smile before teleporting away.
“Look on the bright side, Big Mac, you won,” Spike said.
“I don’t know if it was worth it.”
“Whatever it’s worth, it was an honor doing this challenge with you both,” Discord said in a fake crying voice as he pulled out a tissue.
“It feels nice that we can say that we did,” Spike said.
“But we’re never eating this ever again,” Discord jumped in.
“Nope.”
“Well you know, there's still tons of challenges similar to this. We could do this every Nightmare Night. How about next year we do the haunted ghost pepper challenge?” Spike suggested. His voice was filled with excitement and adrenaline.
“What’s that challenge?” Big Mac asked carefully.
“It's similar to this one but instead of one chip, we get a whole bag of it.”
Discord immediately jumped up on top of the table. “Oh look at the time. Don’t we have a party we have to go to? I'm sure Fluttershy's going to be there. I will see you later.”
He quickly snapped his fingers and teleported away.
“Awww come on Discord,” Spike pouted. “How about you, Big Mac?” He turned only to find that he was no longer sitting next to him.
Before he could say anything his stomach growl and began to feel like it was tightening.
“Oh no…”
Author's Note
This was just a dumb little stupid fanfic that I came up with inspired by a true story. This was originally part of my 'Beyond My Grave' series story but I didn't have much time to finish the whole thing so I decided to post this little part of it so I can have something for Halloween. I hope you enjoy this little bit. I get that it was dumb but that's the point of it. Much love.
Till Next Time!!!
Happy Nightmare Night!!!
