Stuck in Yakyakistan

by Soaring

Rating: teen
Tags: Profanity, Random, Slice of Life, Yona, Human, Prince Rutherford, Yaks, Original Character, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Comedy
Length: 7526

Most humans go to Equestria. Unfortunately for Devin, he gets sent to Yakyakistan instead. Hopefully they can help him get back to Earth...

Most humans go to Equestria. Unfortunately for Devin, he gets thrown off course, landing square into the Frozen North, where the snow is aplenty, the lack of life is high, and the only ones to save him are the Yaks. They like to smash...

...and smash again.

For Devin, he would hope to not get smashed to bits. He wasn't a fan of that. Luckily, the Yaks had something in mind, something that would earn their respect, and would make sure Devin would survive in their lands. All he had to do was participate in some initiation ritual Prince Rutherford declared as his saving grace and survive to tell the tale.

Hopefully Yona could help out. She was his trainer, after all.

Another idea that was inspired by FamousLastWords's brainstorming session. Maybe he needs to write more HiY/HiE on his main instead of shipping an aged-up Spike with every female character in the show. Nah that's not going to happen.

EDIT: Off Hiatus and original chapter now edited to clear any grammar mistakes, and to add more character to the characters presented. Hope you don't mind. Update soon.

Published 2020-11-09 06:00:00 UTC
Last updated 2024-11-10 07:17:47 UTC

Stomp-Out Or Get-Out!

It’s not normal to be stared at by two yaks in blankets.

“He skinny. Skinny like a twig!” the first yak said, their blue blanket draped over their back rather nicely, not a wrinkle in sight. Unlike what they said to me.

See, I knew they were yaks for two reasons. One, they kept saying it all the time. Yak, this. Yak, that. Yak smash! But that was the most obvious reason.

Really, they were full of muscle and massive. I almost took them for mammoths when I first woke up, but I was seeing double and they looked like big brown blurs from where I was laying. Before all this, I remember being at a concert with a ton of freak-shows that really liked to, for some reason, dance the polka while jamming to metal. I don’t know why I was even there in the first place, so waking up in such a cold place with nothing but a short sleeve tee, a pair of pants that had this weird shit stain on the side (it wasn’t from me so I don’t get how that got there), and a beanie to hide my poor excuse of a mop flop was a reality check and a half. Safe to say, I wasn’t a fan of both my situation and my hair.

Unlike my hidden bad hair day, the Yaks were proud. They had fur that was long, apparently brown, and layered. They were walking tanks, minus the guns and the dignity. They had their heads lower than the tallest part of their body, which was their torso, but that didn’t change a thing, their two horns jutting from the sides of their heads were sharp as can be. Besides, goofy head shapes wouldn’t remove their intimidation factor, because I didn’t know if these yaks were as violent as they said.

“No way!” The second yak hollered, their brown eyes gleaming onward. Their gravelly voice echoed in my ears as they continued, “He skinnier than twig. Look like string from Pony Land!”

Pony Land? My right brow began to lift off, but I didn’t want them to see that I was interested in what they were talking about. So I kept my legs closed, and my arms wrapped around me. I only looked on through the crack between my arms, watching them from afar. Hoping—no, praying they didn’t come any closer.

The blue blanket one huffed loudly, grasping their stomach with their hoof.
“Haha! Yak would smash puny string! Smash to bits!”

Either it got much colder than before or the idea of being smashed to bits affected me as a shiver raced down my spine. I put my… twenty dollars in my wallet on the breeze outside being the likely culprit, but I couldn’t deny the hopefully not future prospect of being a victim of a yak smashing incident.

Suddenly, out of the back pocket of the blue blanketed yak’s ass came a large wooden stump. I don’t know how that massive log came out of there, but I knew one thing was for sure: it did not inhibit the yak’s size. They slammed it on the ground, creating a dirt cloud filled with dust. It spread around the teepee, which made me huddle even closer to myself in an attempt to avoid the cloud.

I closed my eyes tightly, wishing I was imagining all this. Hopefully if I shut them, I’d get teleported back home, with my sister telling me that I was a major grade-A Zoomer. I knew what the outcome was going to be, though.

Still, I couldn’t help but take a peek…

I cracked open my left eye to see what had happened. It was oddly quiet, save for the yaks, who were quietly hoof-ing the stump as if to see if it was okay, which it was, since it was a stump. Yet they prodded it and moved it around.

Then, suddenly, the brown blanketed one voiced their opinions. “Say, where Yona at? Wasn’t she back from Pony Land?”

The other yak only shrugged, their blue blanket shifting on their back. “She not say, Yona probably fine, though. She a Yak.”

“Of course she Yak!” the former exclaimed. They excitedly stomped around while the latter stared onward, probably wondering how zooted the former was. If they weren’t thinking that, then I sure was. How could they be so happy stomping around like that? Was this some ritual these two were doing to make me a sacrifice to some all-knowing, all-smashing, all-whateverer god-like Yak?

The survey said, yes, as they both turned their attention back to me. The blue blanketed yak snorted aggressively, glaring at me like I was the next thing on their list of non-Yaks to stomp on, while the brown blanketed one watched on… smiling?

I blinked as I peeked out from behind my little fortress, aka the place I felt safest up, while that aggressive-looking one slowly approached, shaking the ground earnestly with each step. I flinched each time they walked closer to me, and I had nowhere else to go, so even if I wanted to run, I knew that the brown one would step in front of me and turn me into human paste.

“H-Hello?” I stuttered, my voice hitching on the remaining humanity left in me.

The encroaching yak stopped and sat down. They looked down at me before they reached out their hoof. “Hello, String. You okay?”

I blinked hard. I scooted away from that hoof, shaking in my own corner of the teepee, my back up against the tent like a child afraid of his own shadow. “No. Stay away from me!”

The yak didn’t listen. They only scooted after me with a head tilt. “Why? Does Yak smell bad?”

“N-No, you don’t smell bad,” I said out of reflex. I slapped myself silly in my head, hoping that I wouldn’t do that again.

“Does Yak make String mad?”

I shook my head.

The one who I thought was going to smash me to bits looked at their counterpart, who had now grown closer too, their head tilted. They gave me no room to really breathe now.

My heart was beating out of my chest and I clutched at it in hopes of keeping it from escaping.

“Do not worry. Eben not strong. He weak too!” They had bumped up against his counterpart when they said ‘weak’, which made it all the more enjoyable when he snorted like a sputtering faucet.

“Raisa no room to talk! Raisa placed third in Stomp-Out last month! Yaks laughed at her. Laughed hard!”

Raisa… Eben. Those were definitely interesting names.

Raisa rolled her eyes, but I could tell that what Eben said had stung, her ears flopped against her skull, splayed back in shame. “I-I know, Eben, but you not win either! You placed below me!”

I smirked. Okay, I totally wasn’t in danger. As long as I didn’t say anything stupid like:

“How hard is the Stomp-Out?”

The two yaks looked at me with grins on their faces.

I really needed to learn not to open my mouth.

Eben began his broken tirade: “Yak spend much time to train for Stomp-Out. They train longer than most. They take second job for more logs. All for glory. All for honor. All for—”

Raisa, however, was done with that spiel. She had nudged Eben once again, earning her a glare from him for her efforts. She chuckled and pointed a hoof at me. “Eben blockhead. String not from here. String look like string!”

I rolled my eyes. “My name is Devin.”

They both keeled over, rolling onto their backs with their hooves in the air. They looked like they were paddling at nothing, while the cackles of their laughter erupted, which left me to sit there in silence, suffering like I was the end of a joke… or the beginning of a shattered stump.

It felt like forever before I voiced my opinion, “Are you both done yet?”

All I got was another bout of laughter from them.

“He said done! HA! Yak think String might been strung!”

“Strung? HA! Dead End? String name silly! Yak would smash that strung String to powder!”

I stood up and walked to face them. They looked incredibly and utterly stupid with how they were looking at me. Eyes peering up from the ground, their backs anchoring them in place, and their hooves still paddling at nothing; it all culminated to this scene of mediocrity. This scene of pain.

“So, why does the Stomp-Out matter?”

Was I trying to get myself killed? Or was I the epitome of mediocrity?

The two gasped and somehow flipped over in sync, like the group just came back to release yet another studio album saying they were back.

“String must joke!” Raisa shouted, before she checked her blue blanket to make sure it was still attached to her. It somehow still was, which made me feel a bit confused about gravity.

I didn’t have time to think about it though. I took a step back and shimmied over. My desperate plan this time was to make my way out of the teepee and make a break for it. I waved my hands uncontrollably at them, hoping that they would stay there instead of following me, all while I kept a car’s length between them and me.

Unfortunately for me, Death was knocking at my doorstep. The two yaks were on me without any remorse.

Eben was first. “Yak not jokers like String! Stomp-Out is life. Life for all yaks! It part of initiation! Part of history! Part of—”

Eben yelped as Raisa reminded him of his careless ramblings, choosing this time to hit him right between the eyes with a quick yet playful shove. “Eben ramble too much.” She, then, turned to me and stared at me with a fiery vengeance. “Okay Dead End! You need new job! You need to practice! Need to be like Yak!”

Around me were other yaks. They joined in the fray, creating a circle around me and the other two yaks. It was like I was in Fight Club, and I was put up against the two best fighters in the entire place. Either that, or we were about to have the weirdest interspecies dance party ever, and I did not want to be involved in the amount of angst and stump destruction that was to come.

Thankfully, as the crowd grew, so did the attention of the entire place, as a sudden loud bellow changed the crowd’s mind.

“EVERY YAK MOVE!”

It was like parting the Red Sea, only there wasn’t a sea. There was just snow, yaks, and even more yaks, and maybe a stray stump if I was looking hard enough. However, what made me look directly at this particular yak was his jewelry. He had rings on his horns, which contrasted the scowl that wore on his face. Like Raisa and Eben, he too had a blanket, however, his was a deep teal, and was worn above his gold plated armor on his back. The prestige, the jewelry, the behavior of the other yaks. They were bowing before him, their heads attempting to hit the ground but only getting half-way instead.

As he approached me, I was wondering if I was supposed to bow to him. Then I realized I wasn’t part of their clan, so I knew if I were to bow, it could be taken in two different ways: a sign of respect or a sign of disrespect. So, I decided to not be a baby back bitch and stood my ground.

The decorated yak stood there, eying me up and down. Then, he began to speak:

“You no Yak! How you get here?”

I blinked. “I don’t—”

Raisa, the yak I least expected to step in, stepped in. “Found him in snow. Snow cold for String, Prince Rutherford.”

Prince Rutherford gave her a chaste nod. “And why, Raisa, did you bring him here? Without telling yaks?”

She shied away, bowing once again in front of Prince Rutherford. “Sorry, Prince! Was not thinking. Not happen again!”

He stomped down right in front of her, his hoof displacing what little dirt remained. “Yak do not make mistakes! We are strong and great at everything, Raisa! Everything!”

The two yaks that scared me before now were quivering under Prince Rutherford’s watchful eye. This guy meant business.

“Do better,” Rutherford spit out, before turning around to look at me once again. “String was name?”

I shook my head. “No, my name is Devin and I am a human.”

“Devin the huge man?”

At least he said my name right. “Well you got my name right, but I’m a human, not a huge man.”

He snorted, brows furrowing. “Hut man?”

“No,” I began, waving a hand. “Look, follow my lead. Say ‘hue’.”

Rutherford slowly moved his mouth. “Hue.”

“Now say ‘man’.”

Now a raised brow accompanied his words. “Man?”

“Now say it together, like that.”

“Human?” He licked his lips before grunting. “Human sounds like something pony would say! Not Yak.”

I raised a brow. “Well I don’t know how a pony sounds so… I just woke up here in the snow and I really want to go home.”

“Home. What home for human?”

“Not here, that’s for sure. Since you’re talking to me, I’m probably not on the same planet. So if you could point me in the direction of someone who could help me get back home, that would be a great start.”

My plea received a growl in response, “Human, beggars are not choosers. You are not home. You are in our home. My home.” Prince Rutherford glared at me with a thousand daggers. “You must stay, understand?”

I frowned and nodded. “I guess I have no choice, huh?”

“No, or Yaks will smash you to bits.”

Sighing, I steeled myself forward, letting out a hand for him to shake. “Okay, Prince Rutherford. Then what do I need to do?”

He slapped my hand away and roared his decree, “You must participate in Stomp-Out, human! When Yona come, she will handle your training!”

“My… training?”

I gulped. This sounded like I was going to some military camp and this Yona was going to train me. I had never done anything related to the military, yet, here I was, about to be trained in one. Great…

“Yes. Devin look squishy. Look thin too. String accurate description. Yak will feed you snow sandwiches until you full.”

I am going to hate the name Stri—

Timely, my stomach growled. I sighed and asked the much needed question, “What’s a snow sandwich?”

The yaks all around us stomped the ground with their hooves, the cacophony of stomping made the whole place shake way more than it should’ve. Despite the shaking, Eben and Raisa drew close, the female yak being more confident in herself even in front of the Prince as she looped a hoof around my back.

Then, she chuckled heartily. “Snow sandwich later! Preparations now!”

“Preparations?”

“Yes,” Raisa said with a smile. “Welcome to Yakyakistan, String! Hopefully Yona will treat you nice!”

My heart raced at that. Hopefully she did, because I wasn’t ready to die yet.

Author's Note

Yak.
Yak.
Yak.

Rutherford needs more stories please.

EDITED 11/8/2024 in preparation for future updates.

Strung Along In More Ways Than One

Preparations. If only I knew what Raisa meant by that, with her hoof wrapped around my neck, her weight leveraging for me to keep her up. I nearly got flatlined by her though, barely holding her weight by pushing back. Shortly after Prince Rutherford’s decree, all the yaks dispersed, save for a couple, the ones who stayed by me thus far. Raisa was much closer to me, still holding me close after I pushed her back enough to not destroy my body. Eben, though, was nearby, eyeballing Raisa like he was monitoring her pulse with his eyes.

They were close. That much I gathered.

They gave me a grand tour and by they I mean Raisa. Eben stayed in the tent, apparently off to do something... That earned him a glare from Raisa, who snorted rather loudly before putting on a smile that she totally wasn't faking while she took me out of the tent. The tent that Raisa and Eben stayed in contrasted the several wooden bungalows that were densely surrounding us like trees in the Amazon. Raisa told me they were built for those who have earned their keep. I asked her what she meant by that, and it turns out, Raisa and Eben were in tents due to a fire that recently burnt down their own bungalow, which burned everything but the clothes on their backs. So they were living in a large tent for the time being so when their new bungalow was built, it could be ‘easily taken down’. I sympathized with their situation, and I hoped things went better for them, I couldn't fathom how it was easily able to be taken down. I was in there and it didn’t look super easy to disassemble—maybe that was myself screaming internally at the amount of stakes they had used. It was like they weren’t sure it was going to stay down with a hundred of them, so they made sure the entire thing wasn’t going to lift off.

While I doubted their tent’s construction, I later asked why they even bothered having them, as it seemed that everything the Yaks did was based on a ‘smash first, ask questions later’ type of mentality, so why even have a temporary structure when everyone there could help build a new one in one day. She smirked and said that they could do that, but resources weren’t exactly plentiful. Scouts had to be sent out to find the best trees for these to be built, and once they found the right ones, getting them back was a trek, especially during a snowstorm. Raisa was very stern with her explanation, telling me that not everything was by that mentality. It would be a waste of materials to smash a tent to bits. If the Yaks needed to retreat from a threat, making sure they had several tents on hoof to assemble into a temporary new base would be valuable, especially at a moment’s notice.

Guess there was more to them than the mentality I thought they had adopted.

The conversation ended there, even if she, somehow, at the same time, told me a lot about who lived here. There were too many yaks to remember their names, but there were a couple places she took me to that worthy to note:

“And this Yona’s tent.”

I eyeballed it while wrapped in my several blankets. Colorful, unlike Raisa and Eben’s. Mostly teal, but also blemishes of light blue circulated in a whirlpool design. It made me wonder if she was an artist, or if there was some other meaning to the design. I guess that would be something that Yona could tell me about.

“Is she…?”

The words escaped me, but soon fell off a cliff into the snow beside us. Raisa shook her head. “Not yet returned from Pony Land. Should be back tomorrow.”

“Returned?”

Raisa’s eyes lit up like a Christmas tree, blaring at me like a strobe light. I winced, only to pick myself up as she spoke, “Of course! She student of Friendship School. Prince Rutherford told her to go. Make Yak proud!”

“Friendship… school?”

Another nod, followed by excited hoof stomps that crunched against the snow. “Pony friends teach it. Say Yak could learn more about life from it.”

Isn’t that a backhanded insult? I shook the thought away from me. Didn’t need to sour Raisa’s view of the ‘Ponies’ that Yona was learning from.

“Sounds good,” I commented, which spurred a smile and a half from Raisa, her blue blanket still tight against her wiggling form.

“Of course good! Yak and Pony friends, even if Ponies sound weak!”

I chuckled to myself. Maybe they’re both good at backhanding each other. A sport in Yakyakistan? Possibly.

Besides Raisa showing me Yona’s tent, there was another place more appealing than the rest. A large hall, towering in wood tightly crafted to withstand the cold and the Yaks who built it. The stomping up to it did not shake its foundation, and as they approached, a wafting warmth emanated from it. The doors to the place swung open with Raisa’s careful nudging, and she beckoned me forth with a hoof.

“Here the Great Hall of Yakyakistan!”

I gawked, my jaw dropping. I hadn’t taken them as expert craftsmen, but these Yaks knew how to build. A careful fire pit with stones marking its place stood in the center with a steady fire burning brightly, while a stage further in the back stood proudly, waiting for someone brave enough to stand tall and perform a ballad or something. These were the true centerpieces of the hall, while the rest were either filled with empty space, probably where all the Yaks congregated and sat down, or were taken up by large lengthy tables. This furniture was tall and wide enough for the Yaks to comfortably reach for whatever food was served, and for them to sit at it so they could shovel all of the food they wanted into their mouths. I could only imagine what food they would make on those and—

My stomach growled again.

“Is this where you all eat?”

She nodded enthusiastically. “This where Yaks eat and talk about Yak tradition!” She stomped the ground and smirked. “Also Yak news. Important.” A hoof raised toward the air punctuated that very stern tone she had.

Best to never treat a Yak issue as a non-issue.

I swallowed as I took my own advice and spoke, “Good to know.”

“Yak music also played here. And Yaks get in circle to talk.”

I punched through my blanket burrito to point at the fireplace, its circular stone ring holding its flame tightly. “Around the fire?”

A hum, all the affirming, emitted from Raisa. “Yes. A careful distance.”

I wanted to prod her further, as it sounded like she either spoke from experience or she spoke from some other yak's experience, but I didn't. My stomach was clawing at me to get on with things.

We walked around a bit more after that, Raisa pointing out all the different Yaks that lived here. Many of whom had skilled traits that separated them out. Apparently they also had a forge, a clay one that Eben had drummed up. I definitely needed to talk to him about that—it sounded like he could make tools with what they had.

But all I could do now was ponder as I sat in the tent that they allowed me to be in. I was sitting down, curled up and wrapped in the blankets I was given by Raisa and Eben. It all started when they noticed my teeth clacking. Those two were on me like glue, attempting to decide which blanket of theirs they wanted to toss at me. It was a battle and a half just to get one, but once they decided to part ways with a whole chest full, and I had been strung into a burrito like a mouse was lured to cheese.

It had been hard to get out of that blanket hellscape. Warmer than a sauna, though. At least I was warm enough, comfortable, all huddled up in the tent while Eben was absent. Only Raisa stuck around, sitting a little bit away from me. I could feel her gaze eying me up and down, probably happy that my body was no longer shivering and my teeth were no longer click-clacking to the rhythm of a deathcore drummer.

“String comfortable?”

She still wouldn’t drop the String nickname. I frowned. “Other than you still calling me String…”

She snorted. “But you are String!”

I rolled my eyes. “I am Devin, Raisa.”

Each time I spoke, I could see the cold pour through my voice, as puffs of air evaporated with each word. So was Raisa’s though, although she wasn’t as cold as me. Her blanket was cast aside for a new one. A red one now.

“String sensitive?”

I resisted the urge to deck myself in the mouth. “That’s not what—”

“Raisa!” chimed the graveliest of voices.

Raisa stood up and greeted Eben, bowing nicely, even though she smirked and bumped his side. “How was the Forge?”

“Warm,” Eben curtly replied, bumping her back. He ended up walking to their side of the tent, sliding onto the ground. “Repaired armor for Rutherford.”

I tilted my head. His armor was damaged? Didn’t look like it yesterday.

Raisa followed Eben’s lead, sliding close to him and laughing. “Rutherford clumsy with armor!”

Eben joined her in laughter, chuckling into his hoof. “You tell me! Practice yesterday look brutal.” His voice rolled that r hard. “Many dents. Careful stomps fix!”

Guess they didn’t use hammers. Why make a tool when you could stomp on it instead?

I brought my blankets even closer to my body. I wasn’t going to eavesdrop anymore, even though I was welcomed there and not sneaking into their conversation. I sat there, alone with my thoughts.

And then soon, it turned nightfall. Fires were snuffed out, and snores were aplenty. Eben was the loudest, followed by Raisa.

And then there was me, on the ground, wide awake, hoping that I could somehow turn off my brain.

Spoiler alert, I couldn’t. Not entirely.

I did somehow sleep, but I woke up to what felt like a slight skip in time. It was like I blinked and then I woke up. Not to mention I could feel my even worse case of bed hair as the beanie was still on my head, and I was not keen on having my hair freeze. The lack of sleep and complete anxiety of not being at home wore me thin, though. I felt completely and utterly shit, nursing a headache that probably came from all that snoring. I’m lucky the noises they made didn’t bore a hole in my skull. Only my eardrums got that form of torture.

As for being assigned to a completely different yak by Prince Rutherford, I don’t know if I was even going to be staying with Raisa and Eben. It really depended on what Yona was like. If I hoped she was nice. If she wasn’t, then I hoped she was strong enough to teach me how to survive here, because if I was being put up against these two, I was absolutely screwed.

I sighed. Everything contributed to my lack of sleep. I was going to give off the worst first impression to Yona—I sputtered out a cough and cleared my throat. Groaning, I shuffled in my blanket burrito, the blankets tightly wrapped around me while I rolled on the bundle of hay they gave me to lay on. Note to self, see if the Yaks had actual beds in their bungalows. Either that or hope that someone had the capability of making one for me. Laying on hay that they use to cover their roofs with was not the most comfortable thing in the world. It could be that they don’t have the materials to make them, but yet again, they had blankets… they could be using different material that wouldn’t be great to lay on.

With a bit of strength left in me, I peeled the blankets off my body. Panting, I realized just how sweaty I was. My skin was sticky. Did I sweat all the water out of me? I shook my head before cracking my neck. I cooed in response, before rubbing it gently.

My head pulsed. Yep, the newly acquired headache made itself known. Great… all I needed was—

My stomach woke up with a blistering growl. And there’s the empty stomach.

Time for breakfast.

I stretched and dusted myself off. Since I don’t have any other clothes, I guess what I wore yesterday was the only means of production. Only need the simple bare necessities, after all… not that I had a choice. I bent back down to gather a couple blankets and walked out the tent hole. The outside world welcomed me with a bright burst of sunshine, which warmed the ground enough to melt some of the snow. The shoes I wore crunched in what remained and flatlined on the stone/dirt mix.

I took a deep breath and—

“String alive?”

I snapped to the voice that called me. She was behind me, somehow, looking at me with a tilt of her head and a raised brow. She hobbled her way over, which made me sheepishly smile. “Good morning, Raisa.”

She smiled. “Good morning!” she chirped, before she let her happiness fall a bit shorter. “Sleep well?”

“I…” I tried to start, only to cough. I had turned away to let out what remained, and then let out whatever breath was held in my throat. “Not feeling the greatest.”

She closed the distance between us and nudged me back into the tent. “Get back in.”

“R-Raisa?”

She guided me over to her side of the tent and sat me down on the hay there. She looked at me sternly, raising a hoof to point toward me. “Stay there.”

“Stay here?”

She nodded. “Will be back.”

I tried to stand, but those expressive eyes of hers, blue just like her blanket, which she wore today too, glared at me, making me sit right back down.

“Don’t move. Yak fix.”

As I was about to open my mouth, she turned tail and rushed out the tent. The pitter-patter of her hooves against the dirt turned into crunchy steps into the snow. I only heard it for a moment before silence drew close, like a blanket, a cold one.

I gripped what remained around me again, tightly, my fingers getting used to the pose. I wasn’t really selling my ability to survive, was I?

I waited. I waited until I knew she’d come back.

I didn’t know how much time had passed, but I waited for quite a long time. I was starting to count the non-existent dots in the tent, when I started to hear multiple hooves clip-clopping their way through the crunchy snow, and the gravelly dirt that led to me. However, they stopped, momentarily. Voices, more than just Raisa’s and Eben’s, spoke over each other, like sloppily layered tracks in an audio editor. I couldn’t tell what they were saying, it was like a filter was put on them. All I knew was that they were there, definitely—at least I hoped they were.

For a little while, I had my legs criss-crossed. Prior to that, I had paced around the tent just to keep blood flowing through my body. I had to sit back down after doing my little walk in the tent; my legs had been wobbling at that point.

I hope whatever Raisa went out to get will help me out—

“String!”

In burst Raisa, blue blanket and all. She strung along Eben, who looked way more grumpy than he did usual, a scowl ever present on his face. However, he was looking behind him, at someone else, or rather, some other elses—yeah, sue me, I’m not changing my words—a yak and a… pony?

The yak was smaller than Raisa and Eben. They had a more mint-colored blanket that covered not only their back but up to their neck. The edges of it were a darker shade of it, like a teal, with very light green streaks separated across it. A mane brown like their fur spilled over their head, threatening to cover their eyes. However, they styled it in a way that parted their bangs, while the remainder were looped by their ears. The remaining hair was bound with light pink bows. Dark green eyes peered over to me, which, in all honesty, matched the frill edges of their blanket, and even the colors of their horn and hooves.

In all senses of the word, I was shocked. Was this Yona?

Beside what was possibly Yona was a pony. They were much taller and they had not only a very saturated purple coat, but it was like they were all the more strange with their mane streaking with various shades of purple and pink. Their eyes were a vibrant shade of violet, and… their horn and wings stuck out like a sore thumb. Oh, and they wore a rather large crown, and some gold hoof braces to boot. How distracted was I with identifying the color wheel?

I blinked. “Uh…”

Raisa threw a hoof towards the two new visitors. “Here are Yona and Twilight Sprinkle!”

“Sparkle.” The pony, who I could only assume was female, said, her voice tinged with a stern higher pitch. She beamed over to me. “And you must be String?”

“Devin,” I corrected her, before I gestured over to Raisa and Eben with my head. “They’re the ones that call me that.”

Twilight Sparkle turned to Raisa, sporting a very raised brow. She practically threw her wing over to Raisa as well, almost as if it was acting as an arm. “Is this true?”

Raisa frowned. “We sorry, Princess Twilight Sparkle.”

“You shouldn’t be sorry to me,” Twilight Sparkle began, pointing her wing back over at me. “He’s the one who you should be sorry to!”

The new yak snorted. “Typical of Raisa.” She glared over at Eben. “And you too, Eben.”

Eben threw his head up for a second, before letting out an exasperated groan. “He be puny like string.”

“That doesn’t mean you should assign him the nickname without getting to know him first!” Twilight reprimanded. She bowed her head towards me? “I’m sorry you were treated this way, Devin.”

I shakily got up to my feet, which made the pony gasp. “I’m glad you—oof!”

Some of what little air I had in me was ejected out as she barreled straight into my chest, nearly poking me with her horn. I looked down to see those purple eyes beaming up at me, her tail wagging like a dog. She then jumped backwards, like her actions gave her delayed recoil, her hooves shaking while her wings flapped to give her some extra distance. She landed shortly after and shook her head, throwing her forehooves out. “I’m so sorry, I didn’t mean to ram into you—”

I interrupted her with a laugh and threw a hand toward her. “Don’t worry about it, Miss Twilight Sparkl—”

“You can call me Twilight, Devin.”

“Right… Don’t worry about it, Twilight. You’re probably curious about me—” I coughed away from them and sighed. “Sorry, been feeling under the weather ever since I woke up this morning.”

“Yak brought help. That’s why they here!” Raisa stomped the ground, as if to punctuate her statement. Her light brown horns jittered, dusting the ground with a bit of snow that was caught in her mane. Did she… fall?

Yona walked a bit closer and raised a hoof. “Yona glad you are here, Devin.”

The warmth in her voice made a smile pierce my face. I met her hoof with my totally not frozen hand. “Happy to finally meet you, Yona. I heard a lot about you from these two and Prince Rutherford.”

She nodded and shook my hand. “He… told all Yak. Well, except Yona. She always the last one.” She giggled as she said this. “My friends… would be happy to see you, too.”

Every time she spoke, it sounded more like she was trying to find the right words. It… felt strange, but Yona was trying her hardest to sound more like a pony? Maybe I’m reading into her too much or something.

I shrugged off the thought and let go of her hoof. “It sounds like you really did go to this friendship school.”

Yona was about to open her mouth when Twilight, wings spread wide, jumped in, “Yona’s one of my best students!”

Yona’s face turned scarlet at that. “Yona… loves it there!”

I gave her a grin and a half. Yeah, she was definitely nice. “Sounds like it.” My stomach, on queue, interrupted my thought. “So, did you guys already have breakfast or?”

Twilight shook her head. “We would’ve had some but Yona and I got stuck talking with Prince Rutherford, which, while I love diplomacy as much as the next princess, I really was hungry after bringing Yona here to Yakyakistan.” She paused to clear her throat. “And when Raisa over there stumbled in with Eben saying ‘String needs help!’, it was like we both sprung into action.” She sighed. “I only came along to help drop her off, but I see the map should’ve been glowing too.”

“What map?”

She threw a forehoof at me. “Nothing to worry about, heh.” She smiled. “So what can you eat?”

I tilted my head. “Why do you want to know—”

Yona sat down in front of me. “Twilight wants Devin to eat healthily!” She looked back over at Twilight, who smiled brightly. “Right?”

A nod, curt as can be, followed. “Exactly. I was briefed that you were hungry, but didn’t want to assume what you could eat, considering the Yaks don’t have a lot to choose from currently, with supply lines down and all.” She rubbed a hoof on her neck, letting out a nervous guffaw. “I-If what you need isn’t here, I can take you back to Equestria and—”

Raisa and Eben, at this point, jumped in, chanting in unison, “Devin stay here!”

Twilight turned with a raised brow. “And why should he? Look at him, he’s shivering right where he’s standing!”

I looked down and realized my legs were clacking together again. I sat on the hay once more, criss-cross like before. “It’s… cold up here for sure. I’ve only got a set of clothes under here, and they’re definitely not made for this kind of weather.”

Twilight eye-balled me rather carefully. “Can you take off the blankets, just so I can see?”

A noise that sounded like a cross between a squeal and a purr emitted from the pony. While that noise worried me, I wasn’t going to fight her and all the Yaks in the room, so, reluctantly, I shed the blankets, the cold air biting at my sticky white skin. I stood up again to allow Twilight and company a better look at me.

Safe to say, Yona and Twilight shared a look. A look of concern, particularly, but Twilight’s sheepish smile made me want to seek a therapist pronto.

“That bad?” I asked.

She shook her head. “You’re really, really pale. Is that normal?”

The sun and I were good friends, but I never really tanned. I kept looking extremely pasty white and it wasn’t a good look, especially here, from what it seemed. “Yeah, but if my skin turns a bit grayer, I might as well be in the hospital, hooked up to an IV or something.”

Twilight tapped a hoof to the end of her muzzle, before ultimately she sighed and, with a bit of grit, decreed, “You can’t stay here, not without the right clothing.”

Raisa shook her head. “Devin not moving. He stay here.”

“Why?” Twilight asked as she shoved an outstretched foreleg toward me. Her hoof shook as she spoke, “He’ll freeze to death here! And if he can’t eat what you all eat—”

“I can eat anything really,” I jumped in, attempting to diffuse the situation. I walked over to them, which Yona took as a sign to get up and follow me. I glanced over at her as she now stood beside me, smiling all the while. “Look, I know tensions are high in here—”

As if on cue, Raisa butted heads with Twilight, the latter yelping before growling and charging her horn (in that order), while the former grit her teeth, their growl already running into a roar.

Meanwhile, Eben sat there, watching the ‘show’ with his forelegs crossed (if they could even be considered that). And Yona sat there helplessly. Her gaze darted between the two, probably deciding on which one she should help.

I frowned. “I know tensions are high, but—”

“He stay!”

“He’ll leave with me on my return trip—”

“Stop!” I shouted, which made the both of them look over to me, gobsmacked. Twilight’s magic dissipated while her jaw nearly collapsed onto the ground while Raisa looked at me, eyes wide and… a smile gracing her face? What was her deal?

I shook my head. “Look, I appreciate the help, Twilight, but let me try this whole living with the Yaks gig.”

Twilight’s eyes widened as she turned toward me. “You want to stay?”

I nodded. “I have to earn my right to be here, right, Raisa?”

She bounced up and down like a giddy kid seeing presents under a Christmas tree. “Yak Smash-Out soon! It will make Str—err, Devin strong! Not weak!”

Eben jumped in too. “Exactly! Devin grow large. Large like Yak!”

Yona facehooved and turned to me, hoofing me over a blanket—must have not heard her grabbing one. I took it kindly and wrapped it around me while she spoke, “Rutherford told Yona to train you for it. Are you…” She moved a hoof in a circle as she continued, “Able to?”

“Depends on what we need to do,” I replied, pulling on the blanket tightly. “Plus some food and a bath or shower would help.”

Yona smiled. “Yona can help you with that!” She turned and held a hoof to her chest. “Yona will help Devin, Princess!”

Twilight looked at her for a moment, scanning Yona’s face, before her wings sagged. She looked over at me. “Are you okay with this?”

“I guess,” I said lamely as the cold still gripped onto me, making me shiver again, much to Twilight's dismay. “It’s probably better out by you, huh?”

She nodded. “Warmer, safer, and probably a place where you can get some new clothes…” She let out a deep, shaky breath, the frigid air dancing with her anxiety. Her hooves scattered some dirt as she shuffled them. “Look, I… I really think it’s great that you’re trying this out but are you really sure?”

I nodded. “If you feel uncomfortable—”

“No, no,” Twilight began, waving her hooves suddenly nonchalantly around like she was at some tea party where some goofball said something very offensive and was trying to act like it wasn’t just said. “I’m not uncomfortable! It’s just an alien species that has suddenly appeared on Equus and is living with the Yaks without the appropriate clothing and may freeze to death by the time I send an envoy up to even make you some clothes that’ll keep you warm! And trust me, I’m not a fan of closed caskets, let alone open ones!”

Twilight’s eyes were bug-eyed, and she was biting at one of her forehooves.

Yona frowned. “Princess, you should not worry. Yona and friends can get what he needs.”

Twilight twitched in place before sighing and turning tail. She eyed me once more before she said, “I will be back in a week with a friend of mine. She’ll make you some new clothes.”

I gasped. “You’re sure your friend is okay with you volunteering her services like that?”

“Probably not, but I don’t have a choice.” Her look of concern disappeared when she shook her head. “I best leave before the next blizzard hits. Snow drifts out here can be quite tricky to navigate through.”

“Safe trip, Princess Twilight Sparkle,” Raisa said with a wave. “And… Raisa sorry for headbutting you.”

Eben nodded and hung his head. “Eben sorry as well.”

I raised a brow. Was this both their first time saying their names like Yona does?

Twilight cracked a smile. “Don’t worry about it you two. You were just defending him, and I can’t be too unhappy when new friendships are made, even if the circumstances are disagreeable to a degree.” She nodded over to me. “Good luck, Devin. Yona will keep you in good hooves.”

Yona saluted her teacher. “Yona’s on the case!”

The pony let out a giggle-snort before waving us all goodbye with her wing. Everyone exchanged their goodbyes before she departed, her trot crunching the snow that burdened the landscape.

The three Yaks in the tent all grinned. Yona especially, who bumped into me and smiled.

“Follow me, Devin. Yona will introduce you to all Yak foods. Your stomach will be thankful for being so full!”

I wondered, right then and there, as Yona picked up my blankets with her teeth, if I had made the right decision.

Author's Note

Four years later, and I suddenly (in one day) slam out 4.5k yakwords. Yeah, I'm calling them that for this one. Written to the song below:

More to come. I promise it won't take four more years to update this. :rainbowlaugh: