Mad Mad Polterpone

I climbed out of bed, sighing as I headed outside. I made sure to step quietly, since I didn’t want Rarity to come follow me out or anything. She needs rest for her project tomorrow. I on the other hand, apparently did not. As I stepped outside, I instinctively reached for my pocket, before remembering I didn’t bring my phone with me into this world. I sighed, upset that I’d never have my music again. I mean… unless someone finds it and the Umbral Void I got sucked into. But that chance was slim to none.

Deciding I could live without it, I stopped lamenting the loss of my tech, and strolled through Ponyville. Some ponies were still out at this hour, but I could see most of them heading home. A few spared me an interested glance, but I paid them no mind. I'm used to ignoring people I don't know. Although… If Pinkie still plans on introducing me to the townsfolk, I should try to be a bit more friendly. I stop to at least give the ponies who see me a friendly smile and wave.

Eventually, I reached an orchard. There were plenty of apple trees from acre to acre. The place got me interested. So this was a farming village? I had to wonder what they sold. I didn't see a butcher house anywhere, but why would ponies have one anyway? They're herbivores most likely. Still capable of eating meat if they get curious but it probably doesn't sit well with them. I start to head onto the farm, just to explore and inspect the goods. I knew it was basically trespassing, but I didn't see a sign saying not to. So, fair game, I suppose. Long as I don't take anything. Trespassing is one thing. Theft is different entirely. The farmer must trust the people who live here not to take anything. All in all, as long as I live here I better not betray that trust.

I stop at the animal pens. Seems this farmer had some livestock. There were some pigs and sheep here, seemingly only used as a means of wool and fertilizer for the farm. Those pigs were way past the age they'd be harvested for bacon and ham. And I can tell they're well taken care of. Well bathed and fed. Looking past that, I looked at the house in the middle of it all. Two story, the delicious scent of apple pie… with an orchard this big it only makes sense it'd take a well built family to maintain it. But I wasn't about to head in.

Further to the west, I could see a twisting forest. There was a distinct point where the orchard ended and the Wilds began. And I could sense a profound darkness from the Wilds. Drawn to that darkness, I found myself approaching the fence. Once I reached it, I stopped as my rational mind kicked back into gear. The hell was I doing? I can't walk into what's clearly dangerous Wilds without knowing how to fight. Before I could turn around to leave the orchard, I heard a howl. Followed by several howls. As multiple glowing green eyes open in the foliage.

Shit. Well, I guess the Wilds came to me. I reach for my back, crouching into a combat stance as what appeared to be wooden wolves surrounded me. I saw them taking glances at the livestock a couple acres away… no way was I gonna let them steal from this farm…

I raised my wand, giving a shout. "Not on my watch!" I felt a surge of energy as the area around me melted away, fading into black and white emptiness. I glanced around at them, smirking as I initiated a Combat Field. A mad laughter tore out of me as I knew what happened…

"Fools, Fools, Fools! You've just activated my trap card!" I could feel the tension rising as my Soul hovered out in front of me. I grinned as I leaped over one of the wooden wolves who made a charge for me. But I never came back down. I was in free fly mode. The Combat Field was an odd power, but it granted all fighters an even playing field. Just how I liked things.

One of the wolves seemed to figure this out, trying to lash out and clamp a jaw over my ankle, but passing through it entirely. I laughed in it's face as I swung my staff at it, splitting its own soul down the middle, and using my special ability to sunder it between light and dark.

"Oh ho ho~ How do you like my Special Ability? Come on. Try a little bit harder! I need this to be close!" I called. One of them charged forth. This was the last of the three. I winced as it struck true, hitting my soul for what I could feel was a hefty 50 damage. Looking at my health bar, I could see I had at least 125 left to go. So I had two more good hits left in me then… Let's see how long I can last.

"Heeheehee! Nice shot! My turn! My turn! My turn!" I raised the staff again, blasting the Split wolf with my Polarized magic attacks. He definitely took a lot of hits to both halves of the soul. And he looked terrified.

"Surprised? Hahaha! How about another one!" I lash out, splitting another wolf in two, and saw the Light half come out shaking like a leaf. The dark half just seemed pissed. I smirked at them cockily as the dark half rushed forth, striking at my soul and… Doing absolutely nothing. "You know, it takes two halves to make a whole. Maybe if you worked as one, you'd be able to even leave a mark!" I tainted. The last one, who'd managed to hit me before roared as it lunged again. This time, I raised my staff to block, causing this one to get split as well. And now, there were six useless wolves. The others made their attacks too, but they never attacked on unison.. making their attacks actually useless. I just let them wail away for a few turns as I sit, gloating at myself in a hand mirror. Eventually, I get sick of them, and unleash a tidal wave of polarized attacks. That finished them off, causing the combat zone to collapse. I chuckle at the fallen sticks… before I noticed they actually looked like they made good firewood. Someone should save that. I turn towards the farm to see if any slipped past my trap, but instead see Applejack there staring at me in shock. She had on some sturdy looking iron horseshoes made for packing a good wallop… and she stood stunned.

"What in tarnation was that?" Applejack blurted out. I was about to answer before something in my mind switched. That… was a good question… I look at my staff, confused.

"I have no idea what I just did, or how. What the actual fuck?"

"Okay. So what'cher sayin' is, yer character is some kinda monster and all tha monsters have this… Battle Trap? And ya used it ta stop tha Timberwolves from gettin' at my farm?" Applejack asked as we both sat at her dinner table. I was pretty grateful they chose to let me in.

"Pretty much. I already told you about the splitting magic. I just… I don't know how I got access to all that stuff." I answered to the best of my abilities. It was odd that I named my attacks too. Polarized magic? Combat Field?

"Only question left is, why yer up and at my farm at this hour. Care ta explain?" She asked with a raised eyebrow.

"Oh that. Eh… they say Curiosity killed the Cat. I just kinda found out my new body doesn't really need sleep so I can go exploring at night." I answered simply. Applejack nods thoughtfully.

"Ah see… ah know you already made that deal with Rarity, bout stayin at her place for work. But what if ah hired ya to protect mah farm at night? Those Timberwolves been getting nasty lately and you seem more than up to the task." Applejack offered. That caught my attention. I raised an eyebrow.

"How much are we talking here?" I asked.

"Bout 5 bits for every kill, and a bonus 50% of what we get from the firewood you get off them, if ah can finally get a good night's rest while ya protect us. Rent in Ponyville usually costs 50 a month, and buyin land costs 600 last ah checked. So, how bout it? Deal, pardner?" She holds out a hoof to shake on it. I smile as I run the numbers. It'd only take 10 kills to pay off rent, and 120 to buy a house by that figure. Plus whatever else happens from the wood they drop, this would be a decent use of my nighttime activities to keep me strong and paid. I liked the odds.

"Deal." I reached forth, shaking her hoof. She smiled with genuine honesty.

"Ah look forward to it. Now, ah gotta hit the hay. We can talk more tomorrow." She excused herself, before heading upstairs. "See ya in the morn, Felyne." I nod at her as I get up to start my guard shift.