You Don't Know a Thing About my Sins
“You think there are bears out there?”
Raindrops looked up from the fire and tilted her head to the side. “Bears?”
“Yeah, you know. Like the one that lives with Fluttershy,” White Lightning said, moving her hooves a bit closer to the fire.
Raindrops tapped her chin. “I don’t know. Do bears live on mountains?”
White Lightning shrugged. “Aren’t you supposed to be the wildlife expert?”
“I went camping once,” Raindrops deadpanned.
“And that makes you more experienced than me,” White Lightning replied.
Raindrops sighed and rolled her eyes, moving her stick closer to the fire. The marshmallow on the end of it promptly caught fire, forcing her to swear and draw it back towards her. “Dang it! Not again…” she rotated the stick carefully to survey the damage.
Half of the marshmallow was blackened and burnt but the other half was still as pristine as White Lightning’s coat. “Golden-brown is such a lie. It never happens,” she grumbled, placing the marshmallow between two crackers and a piece of chocolate.
“That’s not what the foal scout said!” chimed in White Lightning, munching on her own snack.
Raindrops rolled her eyes, batting away a firefly that flew too close to her face. “Oh, don’t remind me of that guy. What an idiot. All those badges and not one in common sense.”
“You really scared the heck out of him,” White Lightning laughed.
“I guess I did,” Raindrops replied, looking up and watching as her form flickered from the other side of the fire.
“You’re one big grizzly bear, you know that?” White Lightning said, chewing on a smore.
Raindrops held up both of her forelegs. “Roar,” she deadpanned.
White Lightning collapsed to the ground in a giggling fit. “You’re so silly!”
“Says you,” Raindrops replied with a smirk. “The queen of citations from the weather department.”
“Not my fault some ponies can’t take a joke,” White Lightning replied.
“You should know better than to prank someone like Rainbow,” Raindrops chided.
White Lightning only replied with a wink. “What can I say? You win some, you lose… a lot, I guess.”
“Something something the art of war?”
“Sure.” White Lightning let out a yawn, stretching and leaning back on the log she sat on.
Raindrops tossed her roasting stick back into the fire, walking around it to wrap a wing around White Lightning. “You tired already?” she teased.
“So what if I am?” White Lightning teased back, nuzzling Raindrops’ neck.
Raindrops chuckled, turning her gaze back into the fire.
“Something the matter?”
Her ear twitched at the voice, and Raindrops looked down at the mare in her lap. “Hm?”
White Lightning gazed up at her with a pair of wide blue eyes. “You seemed kind of off.”
“No, no,” Raindrops replied, stroking her marefriend’s mane. “I’m fine.”
“Are you sure?” White Lightning furrowed her brow. “You were really looking forward to this trip… I just don’t want you to end up regretting it.”
Raindrops flinched at the word. An owl hooted from somewhere in the woods behind them. The crickets continued to chirp and the fire crackled and burned. She pursed her lips and frowned, feeling the warmth radiating towards her. “Berry reached out to me before we left.”
White Lightning sat up, and Raindrops felt the heat dissipate from her lap. “Oh. Oh no. Honey, what’d she say?”
“Nothing, really. Just that she was sorry, and that she misses me a lot.”
White Lightning considered those words carefully. “Drippy… do you miss her?”
Raindrops recoiled. “What? Whitey, I love you, and--”
“Shhhh.” White Lightning gently pressed her hoof onto Raindrops’ lips. “I know, but I want you to answer me honestly. I’m not going to hold it against you if you say that you do.”
She pulled her hoof away, and Raindrops sighed. “I… A little bit. I just want to make sure she’s okay, you know?”
White Lightning nodded slowly. “I think I can understand that. But… honey, you have to figure it out with her.”
“I just want her to be okay,” Raindrops said aloud. She stared into the fire, and the burning lights seemed to drown out the world around her. Hues of orange and red filled her vision before bleeding into her soul.
“Hey.” Her ear twitched again as White Lightning leaned back into her lap. “You’re strong, Drippy. You’ll get through this. You’re like a bear, strong and tough.”
A smile made its way onto her face. “Heh. Thanks, Whitey.”
White Lightning yawned, rubbing her eyes. “It’s true! You’re a big ol’ grizzly bear. A really soft one at that.”
“Don’t poke me,” Raindrops replied, ruffling her mane. She sighed again as White Lightning drifted off in her arms as the forest swallowed them whole.
Raindrops wished she had a fire tonight. A chilly breeze made its way through Ponyville, malicious and dangerous as it searched for a crack or a hole to sneak through.
She shivered before coming to a stop in front of the Ponyville Community Center. The building snarled at her, and Raindrops could practically feel its breath against her coat. She shuddered again before pushing the door open and trotting inside.
The hall was mostly dark now, with the receptionist’s desk vacant. A growl seemed to maneuver through the building, creeping through the floorboards and dying just before it reached Raindrops’ ears.
She glided down the hallway before coming to a stop outside of one of the ballrooms. With another sigh, Raindrops pushed the door open and scanned the area. She shook her head and trotted into the dim and faded room with a click of her tongue. “What did we talk about?”
“Heck if I know,” came the reply from somewhere within. Raindrops squinted and made out the vague shape of a pony draped over a table. “I was prolly drunk.”
“Of course you were.” Raindrops flared out her right wing and moved it against the wall before locating and flicking on the switch. The room was instantly doused in a high-explosive light, driving the darkness back where it had come from.
Berry Punch hissed, throwing a foreleg up to block out the light. “Just leave me to suffer in peace.”
“No can do, Berry. Your marefriend is tearing up the town looking for you,” Raindrops said as she approached. She tilted her head to the side and squinted at the paper signs hung towards the ceiling. “The… Applejack Found an Apple That Weighed Sixteen Pounds Party?”
“Lotta fun,” Berry slurred. “Pinkie throws the best parties.”
Berry tried to shift to her side, knocking several pastries and cups off the table she was sprawled on.
Raindrops stopped in front of her, staring down at her and wondering if she should be bemused or concerned. “What are we going to do with you, Berry?”
“Leave me aloneeeeee,” Berry whined, trying to shift again but only succeeding in falling off the table. “You don’t know nothin’ about my sins! Just let me dieeeeee!”
Raindrops sighed again, helping Berry to her hooves. “I swear… I don’t know how I put up with you all those years.”
Berry muttered something incomprehensible.
“Hm?”
“You said my marefriend,” Berry said, looking up slowly. “Who did you mean by that?”
Raindrops raised an eyebrow. “Isn’t it obvious? Minuette’s dead worried about you.”
“She’s not my marefriend.”
Raindrops froze. “Really? But I thought you…”
Berry shook her head, stumbling a bit on her hooves. “Nah. She’s datin’ what’s-his-face from Canterlot. I just share a house with her cuz it’s cheaper that way.”
Raindrops blinked a few times, processing that information. “...huh. So, you… haven’t been with anyone after we…?”
“After you dumped me?” Berry asked, swaying on her hooves. “Nope.”
Raindrops bit her lip, pawing at the ground. “Oh. Sorry to hear that, I just thought you two had a thing going on.”
“What about you?”
“Hm?” Raindrops looked up to see Berry staring at her, a strangely sober look on her face. “How was your, uh… camping trip?”
The building seemed to growl again. Raindrops looked past Berry, at the two spotlights adorning the sides of the stage. They seemed to glare at her like eyes, sharp and unforgiving. Waiting for her to make a mistake so they could swallow her whole. “Good,” Raindrops said numbly. “It was good.”
“That’s good. It… yeah, that’s good.” They stood in a second of awkward silence, filled out by the muted thumping of music blasting from the speakers. “I, uh… I’m sorry, y’know?” Berry finally said after a quick hiccup. “For everything. I mean, I get why you left, and I’ve been trying to change, but…” A sour sigh escaped her lips. “I just suck at it. I’m a horrible pony, Drippy, sorry for putting you through all that.”
Raindrops finally managed to tear herself away from the eyes. “Hey now,” Raindrops said, putting a hoof on Berry’s shoulder. “I didn’t come here for your weepy, drunken self to break down on me.” She offered Berry a reassuring smile. “It’s as much my fault as it was yours, y’know. I knew what I was getting into. We just… didn’t work out.”
“Yeah,” Berry replied. “But… you think we could’ve?”
Raindrops kicked a red plastic cup that sat by her hooves. “That’s not for me to say, Berry.” She glanced at the shadows behind her. A strange form seemed to slink against the wall, padding along on all fours.
Berry’s eyes blurred for a second and she stumbled on her hooves. Raindrops instinctively shot her hoof out to steady her. “Aw, there you go saving me again,” Berry giggled.
“Just call me your knight in shining armor,” Raindrops droned, carefully slinging her onto her back. “Come on now, let’s get you out of here.” Satisfied that Berry was hugging her barrel tightly, Raindrops trotted out of the building.
As the cool midnight air kissed her face, Raindrops glanced up at the sky and sighed thoughtfully. She shot a glance behind her and noticed that same shadow staring at her from the threshold of the building. With a grimace, she remembered White Lightning’s words from the other day. “Berry, I’m worried about you. I hate seeing you like this, and I know Minuette does too.”
Berry shuddered from across her back. “I… I know. And I know I’m just letting you all down again,” she muttered. “I’m trying. It’s just hard, y’know? And… and not all of us get happy endings.”
“Hey now.” Raindrops craned her neck to look at Berry. “Chin up. You’ve got a lot left in you, girl. It’s not over yet.”
The shadow from the threshold growled again, but Raindrops paid it no mind.
Berry looked back at her, tears in her eyes. “You love her, don’t you?”
“I do,” Raindrops answered without hesitation.
Berry winced, her ears folding back against her head. But she swallowed and nodded. “I… I understand. But Drippy, I still love you. I don’t… I don’t know if I can let you go yet.”
Raindrops was quiet for a second. The distant growl dropped to a low purr. “You… You’re going to have to, Berry. Maybe not tonight. Maybe not tomorrow. But someday.”
“Yeah. Someday. But it hurts, y’know?” Berry whispered, rubbing her eyes.
“I think it has to hurt, Berry. That’s how we learn,” Raindrops answered.
Berry sighed again, a few tears dropping from her eyes to the pavement. “Thanks, Raindrops,” she said with a sad smile.
“No sweat.” Raindrops watched as the shadow faded away into the building, vanishing from sight completely. She took a deep breath, feeling a weight fall away from her heart and the fog melting away from her mind.
“Hey, when you were camping, did you see any bears?” Berry asked drowsily.
Raindrops laughed. “Oh yeah. So many bears.”
Berry giggled, and Raindrops flicked her tail and trotted off into the night.
