We deserved to suffer

by Morbidly depressed Brony

Rating: teen
Tags: Suicide / Self Harm, Tragedy, Violence, Sad, Rarity (EqG), Dark, Rainbow Dash (EqG), Cutie Mark Crusaders, Applejack (EqG), Equestria Girls
Length: 1532

Applebloom, Sweetie Belle and Scootaloo punish themselves.

After what they did as Anon A Miss. Applebloom, Sweetie Belle and Scootaloo decide to Punish themselves.

Applebloom won't eat
Sweetie Belle won't talk to anyone
Scootaloo refuses to leave her room

Contains; fighting, thoughts of death, blood and bruises

Published 2020-11-22 23:40:00 UTC
Last updated 2020-11-22 23:40:00 UTC

The Beginning of the End

Applebloom, Sweetie Belle and Scootaloo were at Applebloom's barn seeing as Their Tree House was snowed in. After all they did as Anon A Miss they felt truly awful. It felt like they deserved to be dead. Nobody said anything as Sweetie Belle and Scootaloo left. Applebloom just wanted to be alone, so did her friends. Applebloom went to her room and locked the door putting a sign that said "Go away." In big black letters on the door indicating that she didn't want to show her face in public. She knew nobody wanted to see her after what she did.

Sweetie Belle got back to her house and slammed the door triggering Rarity

"Sweetie Belle, you are being loud and obnoxious." Rarity yelled from the other room, Sweetie Belle didn't say a word. "Sweetie Belle did you hear me?" Rarity scolded, "Sweetie Belle?" This time she sounded concerned.

Scootaloo went home to her adopted sister Rainbow Dash's house. She went straight forward to her room. She didn't say anything to Rainbow Dash, she just kept going along angrily. The three Crusaders locked themselves in their rooms and thought how this holiday would be for them. For Tommorow they knew

Applebloom's Story: Hunger

Applebloom was in her room for two hours, crying and wishing she never started Anon-A-Miss with her friends. Her stomach was totally empty because she had not eaten breakfast or lunch today. She was punishing herself by refusing to eat and the Hunger pain was settling in.

"Applebloom." Called her big sister from the other side of the locked door, "Applebloom what did we talk about lockin' doors? Let me in right now!"

Applebloom knew she would be broken by her sister eventually so she walked over, unlocked the door and opened it. She didn't bother looking at her sister.

"Applebloom, what is up?." Applejack said sternly.

Applebloom didn't answer.

"Answer me." She shouted.

"Why do you care?" Applebloom cried, "Just leave me alone and let me die."

"Sugarcube, Are you still upset about the Anon A Miss episode?" Applejack asked calming down.

Applebloom just nodded and turned away.

"Sugarcube, I've forgiven ya and my friends have forgiven ya." Applejack said, "The only person who needs to forgive ya, is ya. I don't want you to get yourself in more trouble. Ya haven't even done anything today except take a shower and brush your teeth. You've gotta eat, Applebloom. Come on I'll make ya something."

"I don't want nothin'." Applebloom said. "I'm not even hungry." Then her stomache rumbled.

"Don't lie to me, kid." Applejack said.

"Look sis," Applebloom said, "Don't even bother making anything for me. I wouldn't ask you to make something I won't eat."

"Alright fine," Applejack said, "But if you decide you want to eat just tell me and I'll get you somethin'."

"You know I won't." Applebloom muttered

"What?" Applejack asked

"Never mind." Applebloom said clearly.

Hours went past and Applebloom still refused to eat. Applejack, Big Mac and Granny Smith asked Applebloom Several times of She wanted food but she kept saying no. She also threw out all her holiday items including but not limited to her Christmas Bows her little tree Big Mac gave her and her little candle. She thought she deserved it and when the day was over she took a shower, brushed her teeth and went back to her room. Applebloom hated herself so much. But Tomorrow was going to be even worse.

"Sweetie Belle and Scootaloo are obviously doin better than me." She thought to herself.

Author's Note

This is based on what happened to me last Christmas. I did something really bad and I punished myself for it.

Scootaloo's story: Isolated

Scootaloo had been in her room all day despite Rainbow Dash's several attempts to lure her out. She was really worried about Scootaloo and couldn't see what was going on on the other side of the door. Scootaloo just sat there with her arms folded thinking that she deserved to be dead for what she did. Every now and then she hit herself in the arm as a way to cause Physical pain to herself.

Rainbow Dash had stood at the door for four hours waiting for Scootaloo to come out of her room.

"Scootaloo." She shouted, "Open up."

Scootaloo didn't answer.

"Scootaloo, you better open this door or I'll kick it down."

Scootaloo still didn't answer.

"Fine." Rainbow shouted, "Have it your way."

Rainbow Dash backed backed way up and charged toward the door. Rainbow ran right into the door but the door didn't budge and Rainbow Dash went down after she slammed into the door. But Scootaloo didn't open the door.

"Okay, I guess I'll come back later." Rainbow Dash moaned.

Scootaloo decided she was done with her holidays. "I bet Applebloom and Sweetie Belle are having an easier time than me." She said.

Talking it out

Later that day the Crusaders were sitting on the couch at Sweet Apple Acres. Their sisters and Rainbow Dash had brought them here.

"Now listen." Applejack Said, "We know you are all upset with yourselves because of what y'all did."

"We brought you all here to ask that you forgive yourselves." Rarity said.

"We love you and we forgive you." Rainbow Dash Said Sincerely.

"The last step is to forgive yourselves." Applejack said.

"We're not going to." Applebloom snorted.

"Why should we be forgiven for what we did?" Scootaloo asked.

"Because you are not the only ones who screwed up." Rarity said.

"We were wrong to abandon Sunset. We hate what we did." Rainbow Dash said.

"But you never would have done that if we never done what we did." Applebloom pointed out. "Do you know how many lives we ruined?"

"Well when you put it that way." Rainbow Dash Started, earning a punch to the arm from Applejack.

"Anyways," Applejack Continued, "You Don't go beatin yourselves up over this for the rest of your lives. We know you've been hard on yourselves because ya feel like ya deserve it. We just want the three of you to forgive yourselves."

The three girls took a group huddle and decided what to do. Actually they were just whispering nothings but they decided what they would do.

"We've decided what we are going to do." Scootaloo said.

"We're going to go my room and continue punishin and hurtin ourselves." Applebloom said as the girls went up to Applebloom's room.

Soon there was yelling and fighting and Applejack was about to go up there and break it up.

"Let them go darling." Rarity sighed.

"Girls, what are we going to do about them?" Rainbow Dash asked.

"I don't know anymore." Applejack sighed.

After a while the three Crusaders were on the ground exhausted, hurt and half crying too because of the terrible things they did to everybody, they thought that they deserved to be dead. Applebloom was hunched over in massive hunger, Sweetie Belle was still dead silent and Scootaloo caused herself to create blood by stabbing herself in the finger with a Paper clip. The three of them lied their in agony until sunset.

Author's Note

If you think I'm a monster for writing this, Good, that's what I want you to think.

Sweetie Belle's Story: Silence

Rarity walked up to Sweetie Belle's room and knocked on her door.

"Sweetie Belle, Are you okay?" Asked Rarity, "You haven't said or done anything since you got home."

When Sweetie Belle did not answer Rarity opened the door and noted that Sweetie Belle was sad. She suspected it was because of the Anon A Miss stunt she pulled with her friends.

"Sweetie Belle darling." Rarity said, "You have got to talk to me sooner or later. I know you feel bad about what you've done but you have to talk about it."

Sweetie Belle just wrote something down on a piece of paper.

"I will not talk to anyone Rarity, I don't deserve anyone." Rarity read aloud. "Oh Sweetie Belle, you do deserve me. You have to open up to me somehow. If you don't want to talk we at least have to communicate somehow."

Sweetie Belle wrote something else down and handed it to Rarity

"I just want to be alone right now Rarity." Rarity Read aloud, "Well okay but if you want to talk you know where you can find me."

Sweetie Belle didn't answer.

Rarity tried to get her sister to look at her but she wouldn't. Instead she lied down and cried softly as Rarity left the room.

For Sweetie Belle the rest of the day seemed to move in slow motion as she tore up all her pictures of her friends and family and threw away all her presents. She told herself she deserved it because her heart was whispering "You screwed up Sweetie Belle." Sweetie tried to get it to shut up, but she could not and that suppressed the feeling that she hated most; guilt.

"Applebloom and Scootaloo are having more fun than me I bet." She thought to herself.

Author's Note

How can I expand on this?