Alicorn King: Hell On Equus

by Wanderer101

Rating: mature
Tags: My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Dark, Alternate Universe, Romance, Original Character, Sex, Suicide / Self Harm, Horror, Violence, Princess Celestia, Crossover, Death, Fallout, Human, Anthro
Length: 3586

A Grimdark version of the Alicorn King CYOA

Ok. How was I supposed to know that was THE Merchant at that convention instead of someone in a costume!? Or that the crown I bought was the Crown of the Alicorn King!? Now I'm stuck in the aftermath of a really dark game of Equestria at War with elements of Fallout: Equestria and Fall of Equestria thrown in.

Basically my take on the Alicorn King CYOA.

Published 2022-02-04 22:00:00 UTC
Last updated 2022-02-18 17:20:49 UTC

Prologue

Author's Note

Decided to do the Alicorn King CYOA as a side project. I decided to go full grimdark with this to give my SI a bit of a challenge. This world is basically a combination of Fall of Equestria, Fallout Equestria, and a grimdark HOI4 Equestria At War game.

Basically the War of the Two Sisters breaks out with Equestria falling into Civil War. While the Solar and Lunar Empires duke it out King Sombra comes back in power in the Crystal Empire and starts a campaign of conquest north against the Polar Bears, Yaks, and Penguins. Stalliongrad and Nova Griffonia are locked in a bloody war with casualties on both sides skyrocketing. Queen Chrysalis attempts to invade the weakened Equestria but is caught off guard by the heavily militarized Solar Empire and a far harsher Celestia who is starting to lose her sanity.

The Commonwealth of Marelandia, Equestria's Griffonia colony, had seceded before the outbreak of the Civil War. The communist group known as Marelandian Socialism or MARESOC takes control of the country. Under the ever watchful eye of the tyrannical Big Sister the country had become unrecognizable. MARESOC is currently locked in a neverending three way war with the Dread League and the remnants of the Wingbardian Empire ruled by Beakolini II.

On Zebrica the Domination of the Zakra had begun a campaign of conquest and genocide across the Zebrican continent. Races like the cats, parrots, saddle arabians, and hippogriffs are being exterminated en masse. Non-Zarkan Zebras are 'lucky' enough to simply be enslaved. There are rumors of a resistance being led by Queen Novo but they are unconfirmed.

Back in Equestria the war still rages. A falling out between Sombra and Chrysalis leads to a war breaking out between them. Numerous factions around the world had been researching nuclear weapons. With frontlines across the planet locked in stalemates the nations that possessed nuclear weapons were more than willing to use them. Cities across the world were engulfed in nuclear flames causing society to break down further.

As if the universe decided the world needed to be kicked while it was down the once exiled King Dainn and his Caribou began landing on coasts in both the Equestrian and Griffonian continents. They immediately proclaim the founding of the New Caribou Empire in the bombed out ruins of Baltimare. As per Caribou law all females within their territory immediately lose all rights and are henceforth considered property. They are still a very minor player since powers all across the world find them distasteful.

At the start of the Equestrian Civil War the god of chaos Discord disappeared. Discord was unwilling to let himself be used as a weapon by either Celestia (or Daybreaker as she's started to call herself) or Nightmare Moon. People across the world whisper about the hidden nation of Discordia which is ironically the safest and orderly nation on the planet. It was a goal of many to find a way to this paradise but finding clues to its whereabouts was nearly impossible and the Chaos God was completely silent.

Discord wasn't completely twiddling his thumbs however. He liked chaos and all but the wasteland the world had become wasn't something he enjoyed. He was unable to do anything about it because restoring order went against every fiber of his being. He had almost given up on finding a solution when he sensed the artifact that he 'lost' in another universe had finally chosen someone. Perhaps this slack jawed rube would be just the thing he was looking for. Unfortunately this slack jawed rube was me…

Prologue

Fuck my life. You probably heard this story a million times. Guy goes to a convention. Buys some weird artifact from a guy that looks and sounds suspiciously like the Merchant from Resident Evil 4. That artifact ends sending said guy on a one way trip to Equestria. It's a tired old trope but unfortunately Discord thinks it's funny as balls. I am the unfortunate guy of this story. Said artifact was apparently the Crown of the Alicorn King that Discord planted (i.e. lost) in my universe. In my defense it was comic-con and I assumed the guy was doing a very good Merchant impression. Even had an mp3 of the 'Serenity' theme from RE4 playing in the background of his booth.

I only bought two things. A Pip-Boy 3000 to go with the NCR Ranger costume I wore and this crown. It just spoke to me for some reason. I had to buy it. After giving the Merchant a rather exorbitant sum I decided to try the crown on. The next thing I knew was standing in the middle of a black void with Discord. Discord explained that the crown I found was the Crown of the Alicorn King and I was now king of the Alicorns. Unfortunately this wasn't your run of the mill Equestria. This Equestria had more in common with the 'Hell On Equus' games I play in Equestria at War. Everything that could go wrong does go wrong.

I was given the task of restoring order to the war-torn planet (Discord gagged upon saying the word Order) and uniting the planet under a single multi species government. A war of this scale could never happen again if everyone was united. A desk suddenly appeared between us and Discord then slid a stack of papers toward me to 'build' my new Alicorn form.

For physical appearance I chose Extra Horn, Bat Wings, and the Horn of Aperion. The Extra Horn to improve my magical ability. The Horn of Aperion to give me an edge against this world's dangers with its reality warping abilities. The Bat Wings simply because they looked cool. Sure they gave me silent flight and a couple of other abilities but it was mostly because they looked cool. Once I selected my choices I was engulfed in a white light. When the light faded my human form was gone.

I was now an Alicorn with a light black coat. It appeared my selecting of the Extra Horn and Horn of Aperion had allowed for a fusion of the two. My dual horns twisted in on themselves and ended in a dual point. It sorta looked like the Dead Space marker now that I think about it… Large bat wings extended from my back and I now seemed to possess a small set of fangs. My Ranger costume appeared to have morphed to fit my equine form with the Pip-Boy secured firmly to my foreleg. I glare at the two hooves that used to be my hands. Sanitation issues aside it was going to be hell trying to figure out how to use these things.

For my powers I went with War, Metal, Creation, Destruction, Lightning, and Order (Discord pouted at this). War was my main affinity since I would certainly need it if I was to unite the world.

"Destruction and Creation huh?" said Discord looking at my choices

"I'd prefer to call it Destruction and Reconstruction." I reply with a smirk.

"That plus your Metal powers is tempting me to start calling you Fullmetal." Discord replied returning my smirk. "Now let's talk about where you will call home."

After looking over the options and having a short discussion with Discord I ultimately decided to strike out on my own. I would build my capital from scratch. This wasn't (completely) out of a sense of adventure but out of necessity. The war had left many cities either in ruin or downright uninhabitable.

The Crystal Empire was gone having been hit by Chrysalis' first nuke. What wasn't destroyed had been looted by roving Diamond Dog War Bands. There was nothing left but a few large crystals too big to be moved. Sombra had moved his capital to the new city of 'Sombrapolis', which in reality was just a collection of scrap and stone huts, where he had gone quite mad.

Canterlot had been nuked during the war by Nightmare Moon. The nuke heavily damaged the city with large sections of it falling off the mountain. Parts of the city had been rebuilt by the Solar Empire but Canterlot at the most hopeful of estimates was at least a century away from returning to its former glory. Celestia (or Daybreaker) was, as Discord put it, unstable. One day she would be full on tyrant while the next she would show remnants of her old self. On other days she would be severely depressed sometimes crying for hours on end…

The other choices also weren't viable. The Zakra had destroyed Mount Aris scattering the Hippogriffs. The Dragonlands were closed off to all non-dragons. Even the Paradise Island of Amarezons had fallen on hard times. Somehow the Caribou of all people happened to find the island by chance! The Amarezons while great warriors had been closed off from the world a bit too long. They were caught a little unprepared when the Caribou charged at their phalanx lines with rifles and machine guns. While they were still fighting much of the island's population had been enslaved.

Now that I picked a place to set up my kingdom I thought I was done. Unfortunately Discord began to grin widely filling me up with existential dread. There were a few more things I needed to select. One of which was my Queen. Apparently I needed to select someone to be my Queen and rule by my side. I wasn't exactly blown away by the choices.

First was Governor-Princess Twilight Sparkle of the Solar Empire. Twilight still stuck by her teacher's side despite her descent into darkness. From what Discord has told me Twilight has gone a little dark herself ruling over Ponyville with an iron hoof. The war and the loss of more than a few loved ones hit her hard…

Second was Nightmare Moon. Discord did admit that Luna didn't go completely Nightmare Moon from what he's seen. While she embraced her dark side it was done out of the need to protect her precious Bat Ponies and not jealousy. Because of this instead of the Nightmare Moon side taking over completely it instead blended with her personality. While she might be a bit.. rougher around the edges she was ultimately still Luna.

The same couldn't be said for her sister. Marelandia seceding, Luna leaving, the outbreak of the Civil War, embracing her dark side, and the nuclear apocalypse had, in Discord's opinion, driven her mad. As he mentioned before Celestia suffered from severe mood swings. One minute she would be the tyrannical Daybreaker, self proclaimed goddess of ponykind. The next she would insist ponies call her Celestia or Tia and have parties with them. Sometimes she would simply weep either for Equestria, Harmony, Luna, her little ponies, or herself. Discord did note that despite her fiery battle armor her mane and tail were their normal rainbow colors instead of flame. That meant Celestia was still the dominant personality.

Queen Chrysalis was next. Discord didn't have much information on her. Thanks to her actions during the war Changelings were persona non grata across the world. Depending on the country Changelings were either imprisoned, exiled, or killed on the spot. She is rumored to be camping out near the ruins of her irradiated capital attempting to hold her what remained of her empire together. Much of the Changeling race blamed her for their woes so revolution looked to be on the horizon.

Dragonlord Ember was one of the choices but Discord advised me that convincing her to become my Queen was easier said than done. Dragons were a prideful warrior race and were quite honestly the only ones thriving in this wasteland. Courting in their society meant proving your strength to your prospective mate typically through one on one combat. Discord explained that while I am naturally more powerful than an ordinary pony due to my Alicorn form I still lacked the skill to fight Ember.

If none of them interested me, Discord said I could use an artifact called the Alicorn Orb to turn anyone I fancied into an Alicorn or their species' closest equivalent. Downside to that is Discord has fallen a bit behind in news lately. It had been 20 years since the Great War so outside the big names he honestly didn't know who was still alive or not.

There was one last pick. I didn’t know what was more shocking. The fact Discord had a daughter or the fact that he was a father! Her name was Screwball and she was as Discord put it ‘a little ball of chaos’. While her powers are nowhere near as powerful as his she is still classified as a reality warper. I frowned at her young appearance though Discord explained that she only looked like that out of personal preference. She could change her form at will and was in reality older than even Celestia. If I picked her Discord mentioned that he would be obligated to help me out as much as he could if only to make his little girl happy.

After giving it some thought I decided to pick Celestia. I had always considered Celestia to be 'Best Pony' and I was genuinely sorry for what happened to her. Her sister hates her again, her kingdom in ruins, and forced to embrace her dark side. Even before all this happened she didn't really have anyone she could call a true friend. They either treated her like she was a goddess or just generally put her on a pedestal. Even Twilight who was the closest one to her besides Luna tended to worship the very ground she walked upon.

"Celly huh?" said Discord with a smirk "Decent choice. She's pretty good in the sack if I'm remembering correctly…"

If I had been drinking something I would have spit takes right then and there. Sack!? That thought never even crossed my mind!

Ok maybe a little…

"Since Celly is a little 'old fashioned' she will most likely encourage you to get a herd." continued Discord, his smile getting wider.

"A herd?" I say hoping that didn't mean what I thought it did.

"A harem. Ponies are a whole lot less prude than you humans. A side effect of being social herbivores with a low male ratio. Celestia lived through a time where it was quite common for a single stallion to have a dozen wives. Add in the fact that you're the first male Alicorn in thousands of years. She'll definitely want you to sire many children."

I sigh. While I wasn’t against having a harem I felt that this wasn’t exactly the time and place for it. I had a feeling things were going to be really grimdark until I restored some semblance of order.

“So that’s my queen done with.” I say “What next?”

“Just a few more things.” said Discord “Next up is how are you going to rule? Are you going to delegate or make every decision yourself. First option is pretty much the reason the world is in this situation in the first place and the second option will either turn you into a tyrant or wear you down.”

“I prefer an Imperial Republic. The world will be divided up into various Regions. Those regions will be divided up into Districts and the districts into Provinces. There will be Regional, District, and Provincial Governors. Regional Governors will be those like Celestia & Luna. District Governors are picked by them and Provincial Governors are elected.” I explain.

“Nice to see that Order ability is already working its magic.” said Discord, gagging a little “Now that’s out of the way let’s move on to items.”

I got to pick four items. For the price two I get a ‘Royal’ item which is a far superior version of it. Since I picked Celestia as my queen I got the Royal Item associated with her which was a special cloak known as the Solar Shroud. It made me immune to fire and heat, able to withstand decent damage both physical & magical, and could make two illusionary copies of myself. For my picks I went with armor, a shield, and the Dragon Sword. The Dragon Sword was an indestructible super sharp blade. Something that would definitely end up being useful.

“One last thing.” said Discord “ I can use my chaos powers to change the world a bit. You get one for free but anything else will have… consequences. Either you pick two or you place your faith in RNGesus. Here are the opti-”

“Anthro.” I quickly say after seeing the first option. “I pick Anthro.”

“You… aren’t going to read the rest?” Discord said genuinely taken aback. “You only get one freebie.”

“No. I don’t need to.”

“Ok. Now I’m curious. Can I ask why?”

“Two reasons. First...” I state holding up my forelegs “GET RID OF THESE HOOVES!”

Discord a finger into one of his ears. “Easy on the Royal Capslock. Remember that you have that now. What’s the second.”

“Tits.” I say giving a small grin.

Discord is quiet for a moment before bursting into laughter. “Oh I like you!”

I continued reading through the choices and picked two more. Well one more. Discord forgot to mention that I had basically been forced locked into one since this universe is so radically different from the standard MLP fare. Alternate Universe is what I had been forced into. The one I chose was Uncapped Technology. Since this was an Equestria at War style world they were already a bit farther in tech having WW2 level technology. I hope to introduce Fallout level tech at first before pushing further into the realm of science fiction.

Now for the consequences… Normally I would have four.

“Six.” Discord says checking his nails

What… I look and see that Discord selected one more change for me. He had picked Lewd. Oh dear god…

“DIS-” I start to yell only for him to clamp my snout shut.

“Easy on the Capslock remember?” Discord warned “Oh come on and live a little. You’re the Alicorn King so a bunch of mares will already want to climb in your bed. This won’t really change the world much. Just make everypony a bit more open and more... pleasing to look at.”

“Are you sure this is a good idea.” I say keeping my anger in check. “The caribou are a thing here.”

Discord snorted. “Even when everyone is super loose and lewd none of them want to be anywhere near the caribou. They are just all kinds of nope.”

Now getting back to the consequences. Thanks to someone I now had to pick six.

“Four.” Discord said again. “You’ve once again been force locked into two thanks to the state of the world. War & Death for obvious reasons and Bad AU. Though I think simply calling this hellscape a ‘Bad AU’ is an understatement.”

That was a reasonable explanation so I nod. I had to pick four more consequences or… I could let fate decide and only have to deal with two. Discord said that the scaling of this world is also tied to the consequences so the situation could suddenly become even worse. RNGesus please have mercy upon me.

RNGesus… has forsaken me…

The choices picked for me were Magic Capping and Monsters. Magic Capping lowered the potential of magic in mortals. Mages at Twilight’s or Starlight’s level were almost unheard of. Most unicorns could competently cast maybe a few spells and they wouldn’t be all that powerful. Dangerous beasts would be roaming around the world preying on settlements and the unlucky traveler. I asked Discord whether they were mutated versions of this world’s creatures and he said some were. The others were ‘outsourced’ from other realities. I did not like the sound of that…

“Well that seems to be everything. Time to send you on your way. What shall I put on your tombstone in case you fail?” said Discord

“Call me… Wanderer.” I replied, deciding to go with my online handle.

“Alright then, Wanderer. Good luck! Arrivederci!”

“Holy Crap!” I yell as I fall through a hole that suddenly appeared on the floor.

Discord smirked as he watched the hole close. Welp, time to head back to Discordia. It would be more comfortable watching Wandy from there. Not to mention that it would let him comfort Screwball. She would no doubt be upset at him not picking her especially after she begged him up and down to add her name in the list. He did warn her that he might already have a pony preference. Turned out that it was Celestia. Screwball would probably become a member of his harem at a later point. She could be very persistent. At the very least his little girl got to be a little girl for a little while longer.

As he prepared to leave he noticed something. Oh dear. It appears RNGesus selected one more consequence. It was the one that forced the world’s scale to Grimdark. Everything would have consequences and danger was around every corner. It would also be much harder for Wandy to make everything better. Perhaps he should go warn him…

Just then Discord heard the dinging of a microwave all the way in Discordia. His pizza rolls! He instantly teleported back home to partake in the cheesy goodness. Wanderer will figure it out eventually...

Chapter 1 (The First Day)

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