I looked at Twilight, confusion sparking in my gaze. “What?”
“I said, should I plan a party?”
“B- but why?”
“That’s what I’m asking you!” Twilight sighed. “I-I don't know. I just….. feel like it?”
“There should be SOME reason!” I looked at her again , astonished.
Twilight raised an eyebrow. “Says the pony who gave Rainbow Dash a pie for ‘Unofficial Wake Your Friends Up Day’.”
“I was proving a point!” I raised my voice up a little. She was terrible at lying, and I knew it. I stopped in the middle of the marketplace, Twilight stopping beside me. “There IS a reason, Twilight. I know it.”
Twilight sighed again, her wings dropping to her sides. “There is.” She looked away, muttering something I couldn't hear clearly.
“What?”
She muttered it again, a little louder.
“Twilight.” My voice hardened. “I need to know.”
She muttered again. “That's IT! TWILIGHT! CELESTIA SO HELP ME-”
I stopped as gasps surrounded me, all the ponies in the marketplace glanced our way. “Twilight, Please.” I murmured, laying a hoof on her shoulder.
Twilight looked up, meeting my eyes. “I don't think you WANT to know.” She whispered.
I was desperate now, needed to know. “Please.”
“I wanted…” She sighed, then took a deep breath. “Iwantedtocelebrate5yearsafterLunasreturn!” She said quickly, then squeezed her eyes shut, bracing for my reaction.
“W-w-what?” I whispered, my eyes growing large. I stumbled backwards, hitting against Applejack’s stand, knocking apples over.
“Hey-” She stopped when she saw my expression. My eyes were large, my body stiff and rigid. I was pressing against the cart so hard you would think I was trying to claim warmth from it. “Sugarcube?”
I took a great gulp of air, and ran. I pushed past ponies, not bothering to apologize. As I swiftly dodged carts, I ignored the now faint calls of Twilight and Applejack, and calculated by the street signs that where I was aiming was about a block away. I could make it. My lungs burned as the cold air whipped past me, blowing my mane and entering my nose. My hooves pounded against the concrete pavement until I reached my destination: Sugarcube Corner.
I slammed the door behind me, locking it with my key. My back legs involuntarily gave out, my flank slapping against the tile. I panted, praising that the Cakes were on a trip. Then, as I had finally caught my breath and my heartbeat returned to normal, I heard something that made it skip a beat. The door was being unlocked.
I quickly backpedaled into a wall, hiding behind rows of packages of frosting that I had yet to open. My back hit the wall hard and I grimaced in pain. What does this pony want? Who was it? What will they do to-
“Hello?”
Just Twilight.
“Pinkie, I know you’re here.”
“Twilight, please-”
“No. Im sorry.” She looked down. “So sorry! I forgot how you felt since that day. Sometimes I forget how others feel when I want to do something.”
I walked from the corner, Twilight quickly embracing me with a hug. “The feeling is mutual.” I murmured.
“Forgive me?” She looked me in the eyes.
“Of course. I can do it if you REALLY want me to.”
“Do what?”
I laughed. “The party!”
Twilight started, dumbfounded. “Really?”
“Real-” Before I could finish, Twilight had already squeezed me in a hug.
What am I getting myself into?
✸✸✸✸
*Day of the party: Nightmare Night*
“I can’t thank you enough, Pinkie!” Twilight and I sat in chairs. Twilight was sipping punch happily. “No problem.” I grabbed a purple iced cupcake from a tray. “WOW!” Twilight snatched the cupcake, examining it. “I-It’s blue, purple icing, and a MOON?!” She looked at me. “You didn't have to do all this.”
I shrugged. “The princess deserves it.”I took the cupcake, taking a bite. “Befifes, evferfpofys hafifng ffn!”
Twilight laughed. “What?”
I swallowed the cupcake. “Besides, everypony’s having fun!” I pointed to Rainbow Dash and Applejack.
The two were sitting, drinking punch. Then, Rainbow Dash told something to Applejack, and she started laughing so hard, she fell out of her chair, Rainbow Dash snickering.
Twilight laughed at the sight, then pointed to Rarity and Fluttershy. They were having a dancing contest with some other ponies. They were all cheering. Then she looked at me.
“I get it, I get it.” I laughed.
Then the lights flickered to the stage. A figure appeared, and I immediately froze. It was the pony I had been dreading most of all. Princess Luna.
I looked at Twilight, afraid. She returned the look. Then, as I looked up, Princess Luna looked me in the eyes, a flash of purple sparking in them.
I gasped, and looked away. “I’ve got to get out of here!” I whispered to Twilight. We ran out of the town hall, going to the back. “What did you do?”I panted. I was starting to hyperventilate, so afraid I was almost paralyzed.
Twilight sat down next to me. “I-I didn't!” She wrapped her wings around me.
“Now it's gonna happen all over again, and I'm gonna- I’m gonna-” I broke off, crying into her wings. “I know she did something. I saw it!” I hiccuped. “I don't want to do this again!” I stared into her eyes and pleaded. “Help!”
“I don't know how!” She started to cry, looking as scared as I felt. “She couldn't have! She was only there for a few seconds!”
“That's all it takes!” I cried.
I knew it. Nopony could help me now. I would have to bear through it. “Twilight.’’ My voice hardened. “Go to the party.”
“But-”
“Please.” I looked at her. “I’ll be fine.” I tried to smile, but failed. I knew it probably wouldn't be.
Twilight looked at me one last time, then slowly walked back to the party, head drooping. I stood up, and sprinted to Sugarcube Corner.
✸✸✸✸
I shut myself in my room, slamming the door harshly. I walked past my mirror and landed on my bed. Tears rolled down my face as I lay my head on my hooves. I got up, and looked in the mirror.
The figure was me, but the tears that would normally be blue, were purple. “Hm.” I wiped them off, onto my hoof. I studied them, then gasped. “Oh nononono.” I flipped them off, onto the floor. “No.” I tried to stomp them, make them disappear in any way. “Please.”
The tears on the floor started to glow dimly. Then they started to strobe. I backed away, whimpering. They started to float up, mixing with others. It grew to the size of a pony, whipping around me. Suddenly, it stopped in front of me, and took the outline of a familiar shape.
I recognized that shape, skittering back into a wall. “I-I just want to be normal! I-I don't want you.” I shook my head, but to no avail. “Please.”
“It's been too long. Don't you know how HARD it is to stay smoke for 5 years?!” The shadow spoke. “I've been wandering through your thoughts, turning them.” She laughed. “Now it is time.” Then, she walked into the light.
She had dark blue eyes, a faded dark pink coat, and a dark pink mane, flat and straight. I gasped, and she smiled. “Pinkamena is back in business, baby!”
I was the talk of the town. A little, bubbly mare with a pink coat, mane, tail, and a cheerful attitude in any situation. I would plan parties; it was my special talent anyway! Ponies loved me, and I loved them back.
Sometimes a pony would come to me. They would usually put on an embarrassed smile and ask: “Pinkie Pie, can I have a party for *Insert somepony here*?” Of course, I would always reply with a giant grin and squeal “Yes!” Everypony deserved a party!
Thoughts fill my head. Like every other pony, they are usually about plans. When does this happen? When should this happen? But mine were different of course. They would usually consist of: What frosting? When did I plan this party? Is today Fluttershy’s birthday?! Normal thoughts for me.
But sometimes, they would turn dark.
I would be walking along the streets of Ponyville, or baking, or talking, when I would hear something. Usually something whispering in my ear. Then I would feel it. My mane as it would convert from its bouncy style to flat and straight as it fell onto my withers. The sensation as my vision would turn darker, along with my blue eyes. My thoughts would change.
But it was all in my head.
My vision did turn darker, but my mane and eyes kept their color and style. I didn't know, but if anypony noticed, they would only see my expression change. Nothing about me would change physically.
But, every happy thought would crumble into deep darkness.
I hated it. Absolutely hated it! It has been ruining my day-to-day life for 5 years. It would usually come when I was talking about my friends. As soon as I felt my demeanor change, I would have to make an excuse and get to Sugarcube corner, fast. Only one pony other than me knew.
Sometimes, somepony would catch me on my sprint back and would ask questions like:
“Are you all right?”
“Are you ok?”
And the worst of all was: “What's wrong?”
It was terrible, the worst question I have ever received.
Because I can never answer truthfully.
Because……
I really don't know.
