Life Anew

Its been a few days since I got back from my travels to save my father from a group of Mercenaries. Had to have Luna help me sleep well until I trusted myself.... Took about two nights. Night I stayed in the castle I did end up having a nightmare... and wetting the bed but that doesnt matter. I just had that feeling that was gonna happen so I just had to pad up the next few nights. Tonight I was back on the couch sleeping... Applejack was upstairs in bed and actually understood I didnt wanna do anything that would make her mad. Hit her, hurt her... piss myself again.... that would've happened anyways but still didnt wanna freak her out and wake her while I was asleep. I couldnt sleep right now. Didnt know what was wrong but just decided to watch whatever was on TV, volume down with me in nothing but a shirt and a diaper. There was nothing interesting on. Lucky I had my phone sitting on a charger long enough to reach the coffee table. Good enough too. Ended up getting a phone call that just made my phone vibrate. I snatched it up and unplugged it and was surprised to see it was Gilda. I answered it before stepping outside and flying up to the roof. "Gilda? The hell are you doing calling me this late?" I asked.

Gilda sighed as I looked up at the night sky. "...Sorry Ry I just.... I'm just scared is all...." She said.

"Scared? Of what?" I asked. "You arent having those thoughts again are you?"

"....I.... I honestly dont know...... One minute I'm fine, sleeping... next thing I know I feel like there's something gonna happen... like I'm not safe here..."

"Does it have anything to do with something you did? Maybe someone you know?" I saw a few stars just twinkling in the sky, the moon a bright crescent. Yet all I heard from her was a whimper. "Gilda...."

"....Dweeb I just... I dont know... Both? Neither? I just....." I huffed hearing her break down a little. I huffed.

"...Alright... Here's what i'm gonna have you do... What I want you to do is just go see if you cant crawl in bed with Dash, if she asks, tell her what's going on and I wanna see you both here tomorrow morning. Dress in whatever you want. I got paid and I'm gonna try to cheer you up with a mall run. I think I know just the shop to get your mind of the craziness. I can even buy some lunch. Take a deep breath... Maybe go outside and piss yourself."I heard her snicker slightly.

"You sure that's not some perverted way of asking me to wet myself for you?"

"I mean... Definitely would make me feel better..." I got up and flew down from the roof dipping back inside. Shut the door just about as quiet as I could.

"Now what's up with you? I do what you want, you tell me what's on your mind. Sound good?"

"Yeah... Sounds alright."

"Alright... Now spill the beans before I spill my lemonade." I huffed laying back down on the couch, covering myself with the blanket I had.

"Well... Just... Honestly dont know.... havent slept right lately... nightmares, wet bed.... the works... Not sure if I'm just nervous about getting a kid or what but I just cant sleep...."

"What are those nightmares about?" I thought for a moment. Did I wanna tell her the truth of what happened or do I wanna just lie my way out of it? I had to do something.

"Well... Dont remember what really but... I know there was a lot of killing in them... me getting killed, me killing whoever comes at me.... I just... is my brain trying to tell me something?"

"Certainly sounds like you're afraid honestly... same with me... I know I said I dont know what's scaring me but with you? Worlds changing a bit too fast for your liking. Wanna do everything you can to protect your family but you dont wanna go too crazy to where you're gonna get yourself killed in the process. You arent invincible. Neither am I. And you know... Mall doesnt sound too bad for a thing tomorrow... and if you're talking about the shop I'm thinking about.... I'm getting something new to play with arent I?"

"Maybe something we can both play with but hey... your choice.... Dash gets choice on lunch though considering I owe it to her after a stupid bet..." Yeah. She bet that she'd win against me in a racing game she bought. And here's the thing. I didnt know how to play this nor did I know the secret ways to finish races. She beat me by a minute. Told her she had choice of lunch next time we were together. She never said what the bet was gonna be for, so that's what we settled on.

"Alright. Sounds alright. You gonna bring the wife or we going alone?" I looked upstairs.

"Thinking we're gonna be alone on this. Twilight's bringing her and the rest of the family to the castle for a day, plus my mom is coming down from Clousdale to spend the night. You and Dash are welcome to come if you want. Sure my mom and Twilight wouldnt mind." She sighed.

"We'll come but if either of them give a fuss about us, I'm throwing you under the bus...."

"Fine with that. Now about my request?" She sighed.

"Expect a video by morning. Got something I need to do first."

"Well dont get yourself in trouble. I'm not gonna bail you out here."

"No promises but you're gonna like what I send. Now go to sleep. Not having you drive with your eyes closed. Later." She didnt even let me say goodnight. I just covered myself up and nodded off.

Though as I slept I started to dream. This started out normal. Gilda and Applejack on each arm wearing nothing but stockings and garterbelts with Daring at my feet wearing the same thing doing you know what... We were in what looked to be a private room at a strip club. No music though. Though something strange happened. My dream started glitching out like it was a video game. Both Applejack and Gilda faded and then Daring... she left the job half finished until... I was cuffed, chained and gagged. I knew this was a nightmare as soon as someone long dead reared her ugly head around.... Berry. She walked up to me, smug smile on her face wearing a leather outfit, tits and crotch in view. She shushed me as she mounted me and just started riding. I couldnt do anything. Couldnt break the cuffs or chains, couldnt call for help but I was freaking out. I could hear her moans and almost feel her cunt gripping me. Only thing that made me wake up was that she rode me faster and faster until she tipped the chair back and I fell. Only woke up on the floor with my alarm going off and I'm just wrapped in the blanket feeling soaked in my shorts. I grabbed my phone, shut the alarm off and got up holding the blanket around me as I went upstairs. When I got back to my room I saw Applejack getting ready herself. She was just in her pajamas at the closet trying to pick out what she wanted to wear for the day. I shut the door and she looked at me giving a smile. "Mornin' sugarcube! Sleep alright last night?" She asked. I gave a shrug laying down on the bed. "Ah... Take it you didnt sleep all too well..." I shook my head. "Need a change?" I nodded. "Alright. Gimme a sec to get everything ready. You just tell me what's on your mind."

I sighed as she started digging into the closet. "Applejack... you know I love you right?" I asked.

"Of course I do Ry. I stayed with you when shit was going down on the homestead, kept talking to you when Big Mac wasnt, even said yes to you asking me to marry you after you got into a shootout... Hell if those guards hadnt gotten us out when that shot in the bathroom was fired off I probably would've been hiding behind that bar... Hell I didnt even know I'd get to see you... thought you were the one who was shot for a minute..."

"Well think how I felt not knowing if you were gonna turn up dead at the table or something.... But that dream I had last night.. started out great.... Just went weird fast...." I watched as she brought over a fresh diaper and some wipes and powder.

"Well you know as long as you come back to me and give me some of that love, I aint gonna think twice about what you do..." She laid the items down and just started to change me but as she pulled back on the diaper she stopped before looking to me. I blushed hard knowing damn well what she was seeing. "And something tells me this dream was still good even if it was weird."

"...in a sense...."

"Who was it sugarcube? Gilda? Fluttershy?" I swallowed a bit.

"It was you, Gilda and Daring at first but... there was someone else.... and I'm not sure why she was even in that dream...." She hummed as she wiped me down.

"Something tells me this 'guest' in your dreams wasnt welcomed what so ever...." I nodded. "Who was it? I aint gonna be mad."

"....B-Berry...." Her eyes opened wide before giving me a confused look. "Yeah... I know.... I didnt want her anywhere near me but I couldnt do anything.... I was cuffed, chained and gagged... I couldnt push her off, couldnt tell her to stop...." She gave me a kiss on the cheek seeing me tear up.

"You're alright Ry.... it was just a bad dream... she's dead.... you know this.... You were the one who shot her dead."

"I know but... why the hell was she in my dreams....?"

"That's something to ask Luna.... Maybe you can call her later before we go to bed."

"Yeah... I might do that.... Also letting you know I'm heading to the mall with Gilda and Dash. Gilda wanted to get out of the house.... guess its the same here." She sighed as she powdered me down and padded me back up.

"Well alright but you be careful. At least try to be at the castle around dinner time. I'll pack your bags, make sure you have something fresh just in case.... Speaking of which you may need to stop by the shop and get some. Down to the last few right now and I dont know how long you're gonna be pissing yourself for. Rather it wouldnt be for long because I'm kinda wanting you back in bed... And maybe after that dream you had last night, maybe give ya something to hold to remind you what you got....." She blushed a bit and I blushed harder.

"AJ.... Anymore talk like that and this diaper is gonna have broken tapes and I'm gonna be on show if the girls come in.... Would rather not have that...." She sighed and helped me up. "Well get dressed and I'll send you on your way with a few in the car and I'll have one with me when you come to the castle." I gave her a kiss and started throwing some clothes on. Grabbed a teeshirt, jacket, pants and my sneakers. She hummed as we left the room together. Still nobody up but us.

"If anything, hit up Sugarcube corner for breakfast. I dont really feel like cooking anyways, Big Mac has his cereal and the girls got their toaster pastries." I gave a nod. "Alright you be careful now. Get on outta here.... Maybe bring me some of them Pretzels from the food court though before you come to the castle... baby's got me hungry for one of them." I sighed and hugged her giving her belly a rub.

"Well you tell that baby daddy's gonna be away and not to cause any trouble today."

"No promises there.... I'll see ya later sugarcube... Be good now." She broke the hug and watched at the door as I went and grabbed my keys and my phone before making my way to the car.

I drove for a bit. Nothing extremely interesting there but.... Something felt off about one of the cars around me. I was looking around at a light and saw a car that was familiar somehow. But I know you're asking 'why are you thinking that? There are cars that are the same out there. Color, make, model.' But that's the thing. Yes it would be the same but my eyes locked onto one car that was tripping the fuck out of me. One that basically made a turn right in front of me. Silver coupe, semi tinted windows but.... There were a few details I swear i saw. A small pink flower decal on the back window and a quick glance at the license plate that said 'B344IE'. Yeah. I swear I saw that. I just shook my head and grabbed my phone attaching it to the dash before unlocking it and starting to call Gilda with the speaker phone on. Just as I hit the call button the light turned green and I started driving again. The phone buzzed for a moment before I heard a click. "Dweeeeeeeb.... what do you want? I thought we were meeting at the mall later...." I heard Gilda say.

I huffed. "We will but right now I need you and Dash to meet me at Sugarcube Corner. Energy drinks for you two when you get there. On me." I said. "It's important. See you when you get there." Didnt give her another moment to talk before just hanging up. I even noticed her text message of the video she said she'd send. Just caught a glimpse at the next light. Oh yeah.... It was gonna be good if she was under a street light. Anyways I turned on the radio and just listened to some songs to get my head on straight. Though this early? Especially on a saturday? Talk shows. All the stations. Pop, rock, metal, even the alternative station. Didnt really take that long for me to get to Sugarcube Corner. Pulled up right in front and hopped out.

Inside I saw Mr Cake putting donuts into a case and Mrs. Cake feeding the twins with Pinkie at a side table. Mr. Cake wearing his usual. White button up, striped bow tie, matching hat and slacks. Mrs. Cake had just a striped blue dress on and Pinkie? Tight tee, shorts and high knee socks. Twins, in their footy pajamas still. I walked up and in, the bell ringing alerting them all. Pinkie set the twins food down before rushing over to me hugging me. "Ryder!" She said. "Here just in time for breakfast!" She took me over towards a table near where she and Mrs. Cake were feeding the twins. She sat me down and took her seat with her little impromptu family. "Mr. Cake will get you your usual. How are you feeling after being back from my family's home?" I sighed a bit leaning onto the table seeing the twins smiling faces.

"Well... Gotta say it was an experience.... Take it you're only asking because you heard something from your parents?" She nodded.

"Yep. My father sent a letter apologizing to you, even having Maud send you something as a little gift as well." I gave a small smile.

"Well... Guess I'll write a thank you letter once it gets here. But uh.... Can I have you join me, Dash and Gilda at our table when they get here? I gotta ask something of all of you." Pinkie looked at me worried as she fed Pound some food.

"Is everything okay? Do you need some time with Aunty Pinkie? Are they coming here to hurt you?" I huffed.

"No Pinkie, they're not coming to hurt me...." I leaned back in my seat. "Just.... Something happened last night and I'm just kinda... confused I guess..."

Mrs. Cake reached over and wiped her daughters mouth with a napkin. "To me, that sounds almost like trouble in bed...." She said. I blushed hard just as Mr Cake came over with a few chocolate twist donuts and a chocolate milk.

"I-It's not that Mrs. Cake... Its just... Well... have you ever thought about someone who has been out of your life so long that it just seems weird you're thinking about them in the first place?"

Mr. Cake sat down. "To be honest Ryder, I've had some of those thoughts early in our marriage." He said. "I had an ex that really made herself known at times...."

Mrs Cake laughed a bit as she grabbed her daughter from the other side of the table and pulled her up onto it. "She was just a NUTCASE!" She said. "She would always try to sabotage our dates whether it be by sending letters that were from 'each other' or trying to ruin dinners at restaraunts by tripping a waiter, pulling the fire alarm or even ordering stuff saying that we would pay for it. Drove the bills up but one night we told the manager of one restaraunt we were on a date and told them to watch out for her, provided a picture and everything. But he played along with her. She tried everything. Tripping our waiter, driving up the bill and everything. She was thwarted because the manager basically said it was her birthday, got the workers to bring attention to her when our food was brought out, then when ordering food saying Carrot would pay for it, he came over to us, told us what she ordered and we just played along. She ended up getting stuck with the bill and when she refused to pay she ended up in the back of a guard car. Came back a few dates later but what made her stop was him putting a ring on my finger." That's when Pinkie pulled Mrs. Cake close and whispered into her ear. The smile was wiped from her face within a minute. She looked back at me. "Oh uh.... So sorry Ryder I just... Pinkie just told me that your ex was a... bit of a psycho but in another sense and that she's no longer with us.... Correct?" I gave a nod. "Well... I'm not sure what to tell you there.... its strange yes but... I think you should take Pinkie with you when you go back out. Think she's a tad worried for you anyways...."

I sighed. "It's alright. Wasnt expecting for anyone to know but... If Pinkie wants to come with me, she's more than welcome." I said grabbing the bottle of chocolate milk and opened it. "Just hoping that Gilda is gonna bring her car and not Dash's bike... Dont know if everyones gonna fit into the car...."

Pinkie smiled brightly. "Oh oh! We can take my van! I cleaned out all the Balloons and party favors and even had to get rid of most of the candy in there because they went bad." She said. "You dont even have to worry about me playing any loud CDs. Blew out my speakers during the last party and fixing them is a biiiiiiiit expensive." She smiled nervously.

"As long as I get to sit in the front, we can take it. Just meet me in our usual booth and... maybe get a few energy drinks for them." I took out my wallet and handed her a few bits. She nodded and went to the counter. I just took my donuts and took em over to the corner booth just sitting down. She brought em over, went and helped Miss Cake take the twins back upstairs and come back down only to join me.

Not long after Dash and Gilda came in. Dash was wearing a blue leather wonderbolts jacket, jeans and matching blue sneakers. Wouldnt doubt she had a teeshirt Mama Spitfire gave her.... Gilda was just in her normal. Skinny jeans with a hole in the knee, Motorcycle boots, black leather jacket and a Metallicolt tee. One of their latest albums too. Coffin, shock chair, skeleton sitting in it. Gilda grabbed one of the energy drinks off the table and sat next to me while Dash sat next to Pinkie. "Alright Dweeb... The hell is so important that you have to call us this early?" She asked.

"Well... Minds been all over the place lately and last night was just a bit off the deep end... Nothing dark but.... It went weird...."

"Swear to god dweeb if its those dark thoughts again Dash and I wont hesitate to hold you down while Pinkie calls Twilight for transport to Canterlot."

Pinkie looked to her. "Again?" She asked.

I huffed and looked to Pinkie. "I'll explain later but that's not what I'm talking about." I said. I looked back at Gilda. "Glad to hear you have my back still but listen. Last night after I had talked to you I got to sleep but I had the weirdest dream.... Started out normal.... The usual horny dreams...."

Gilda chuckled a bit. "Me and the wife going at it with you?" She asked. I gave a nod. "Do tell more..."

"Well thats the thing... didnt last long... You guys disappeared and in your place came uh.... My ex...."

Dash and Gilda looked to each other a bit shocked and confused. Dash looked back at me. "What the hell? Why are you thinking of that bitch?" She asked. "She's dead and you're the one who put her six feet under."

"I know but I have NO clue why she was in my dreams and on the way over here I could SWEAR I saw her car."

Gilda grabbed me by the shoulders and looked me dead in the eye. "Ryder. She's DEAD." She snapped. "She's been dead for a while now. I'm not sure if you're having regrets killing her but she needed to die if she killed your parents and threatened to kill your wife."

Dash huffed throwing an arm over Pinkie and leaning onto her. "Well definitely a good day to go and chill with a mall visit." She said. "Sounds like you are PARANOID. Like seriously I havent seen you this caught up on something this confusing since you were still trying to find work."

"Seriously dweeb you're in more need of it than even we are! Swear after we're done with what ever we do at the mall I'm taking you back home, see if we cant get you to get some sleep because its seeming like you didnt get ANY last night."

I huffed. "Well you would know what time I was up until...." I replied before taking a bite of whatever I had left of my donuts. "...Did anyone even bother what time the mall opens?"

Pinkie grabbed at her pocket bringing her phone out. "There's a party supply store that's there I know opens in an hour...." She said. "Other stores should open around that time.... So... nine thirty?" I grabbed my phone and checked. Yep... Was getting close to eight thirty... about five till actually. "If we need to wait an hour we could plan out what we're gonna do for Ryder's new baby!"

Dash kinda giggled a bit. "Oh yeaaah! Ryder's having a kid. Woulda thought Big Mac would knock somepony up. Maybe even Pinks or Gilda getting knocked up by someone." She said getting up.

I huffed nudging Gilda out of the booth. She got up letting me get up and stretch my legs. "Well," I started. "I was thinking when she goes in to the hospital in a few months we can have someone go with her that isnt me just to know if its gonna be a colt or a filly. Then I guess Pinkie here could throw a little gender reveal party in here, Cakes can bake a cake with two different icings yet one color of the cake itself or maybe even do a balloon full of colored confetti, but for the love of Celestia.... No matches and no fireworks.... Dont need another 'gender reveal party gone bad'." Yeah... Shining tells me far off to the east of the Crystal Empire in the fields some numbskull got the great idea of using weapons grade explosives to let everyone know what your baby is gonna be.... Fucker caused a wildfire, burned down two lodges and campsites, injuring many, same with lost and unknown dead.

"Maybe see what your mother has? Could ask if she can do colored trails for a little performance."

Honestly we talked about that for a while. Got a lot of good ideas which I actually listed in my phone. There were some good ones including that wonderbolts trail thing with my mother but I feel she couldnt keep a secret with this considering she was so excited knowing she's getting grandchildren... Should even tell mom and dad too... I'll have to talk with Luna later. Had the simple cake idea listed, the wonderbolts thing and a few others.... one being an idea where I have to go into a dark room with flowers not knowing if one of em is a joke plant..... Writing it down with a big old NO on it. Anyways after we were done with our drinks and food we piled into Pinkie's van. I got shotgun considering I called it before Dash did and Pinkie told her she already said I could have it. Oh Dash wasnt happy but didnt give a flying fuck. I went and just relaxed in the front seat. Dash and Gilda had to get into the back. Neither minded.... mostly... As we drove towards the other end of town I couldnt help but just look at all the passing cars. Just made sure I wasnt going insane. Put my mind at ease a bit. Didnt take us but twenty minutes to get to the mall. Last I was here was.... I think it was when the house burned down and Celestia took me to get new clothes. Things changed. Looks like one of the big stores went out of business. There were some stores that were taken out with new ones put in their place. The shop where I bought my clothes was still here. We parked near there and we just split up. Me and Gilda went one way, Dash and Pinkie went the other. Gilda looked to me as we passed a local game shop. Wanted to duck in SO badly but I couldnt. No more space for my games... need an external hard drive. "So Dweeb...." She said. "What's really going on there? Seriously think you're seeing things..."

I huffed looking at a store for expecting mothers. "Gilda I am NOT lying! I know what I saw." I said. "When someone dies, their plate, destroyed unless it can go to another who cosigned and last I checked, her family had passed away before she got two shells to her name. No siblings, no other family, she was the last in her line.... "

"Well maybe you just saw something like it. Something close but not exact though your mind just fooled you into seeing that. Lets just take a deep breath and go find that shop with the toys you're so keen on buying for me.... Maybe you get to see me use it in the back of the van if you're lucky...." She put a hand in my pocket.... front... not back.... I was fast to move it before someone saw. I might like fooling around where we could get caught but when we we're out right in the smack dab middle of a stage getting ready to fuck like it was performance art? Nope. No way. I'd rather do it back seat of a car in an alley way rather than someplace actually busy. I sighed.

"Maybe. Lets get your toy, maybe later if you can come with us to the castle I might wanna have you diapered and in a dress. Up for that?" She sighed stretching.

"I guess so... Baby's little dresses have been hanging in the closet taking up dust... Havent worn one since..." I sighed and just turned a corner towards good smelling food from the food court.

"It's definitely been a while..." I looked around at a few shops. Some were abandoned, others just about to open. Some were opened and ready for customers. Kiosks were all closed too. At least some were.... others were just opening up. Lifting up the weighted curtains, the shutters and what not. Smiled at a few ponies who I made eye contact with. "I mean... as long as we have our own room, the girls are asleep and if AJ is okay with it... She's been moody lately and I know that's just mood swings because of the baby... And yes, we should get condoms just in case...."

"Yeah.... You might be getting a kid but that can just stay the HELL away from me.... Well... Unless you need a sitter and I'm not drunk...." We started towards a store that had chains in the windows, mannequins wearing pop culture tees and what not... This store even had a section for my favorite games too albeit with not so good designs.... This place had just about everything. Gag gifts, gags, sex toys and other accessories. I swear Gilda was like Scootaloo or Applebloom when I tell them they can pick out a toy. She made a b-line straight to the sex toys while I just looked at some of the other stuff. As I was looking at some drinkware I just had this feeling like I was being watched.... Not only by the security camera or the employees who were at the register but by some outside party. I checked out the door, nothing, same with through the windows and what not. I'm not sure what but something felt off. Its either I was being watched or I felt nervous because some of the staff know me and that I'm married yet i'm buying a sex toy for someone who I just fuck. Most likely the former. We didnt spend much time in the store. She found the toy she wanted and we paid for it and left. As we left the store, her black bag in hand, she looked to me. "You good dweeb? You seem a bit.... uh.... Whats the word.... Disturbed?" I looked over my shoulder behind us. Didnt see anyone following us but I could SWEAR someone was. She looked behind us as well and huffed before grabbing me and pushing me towards a little alcove with a water fountain. "There is NOBODY there Ryder! Chill! Just take a deep breath, get something to drink and when you're ready we can go find Dash."

"Gilda come on, w-w-we just need to keep moving." She grabbed me by the shoulders and pinned me to the wall.

"Ryder. Look at me. Your ex is dead. She's not coming back. She's not gonna hurt you. Are you padded right now?" I hesitated for a moment. "Ryder...." I nodded. "...Alright... Just relax... piss yourself... Deep breath and release...."

"But... I dont have a change...." I whispered blushing hard.

"Ryder.... I'll shell out the bits to go halves on a pack if you can get Pinkie to swing by the shop... just... relax...." I gave a huff knowing damn well if I tried to walk away she'd grab me and slam me against the wall... either that or drop my pants for everyone around to see. Some gave us a glance others just minded their own business but my heart was jumping right out of my chest still. Now I know what you're thinking. 'You've done this before! You've gone and pissed yourself in front of everyone before!' ....Mostly in front of family.... Mom, AJ, Scootaloo..... Princesses as well but those were different... It was either fear, overly full bladder or its because I trust them not to yell out to the public about how much of a baby who likes to piss his pants I am. Yeah.... Gilda has threatened to do it before when I pissed her off... Happened when I was attacked by changelings. Took a few days to myself, learned everything the third day before coming back home. Gilda and I went out for lunch, accidentally ordered the wrong thing, made me go and give it back to the clerk and get her the right thing, I did yet she made a big fucking deal about it and when I tried to correct her on it she threw that card out there. Yep... Threatened to yell out to guards and the town that I wear and wet my diapers. She calmed down that night when the Princess took her to the spa and out to get a new outfit as a little 'sorry you got molested by changelings'. But I was stuck unless I did what she asked. Though the only way I could do it was just pull her in and plant a kiss on her which she took, knowing what my brain was saying. I relaxed myself and before I knew it I was just pissing myself. Lasted about a minute or so before I finished and we were back on the way and nobody noticed a thing. Thankfully. Yet... We had to stop. Not because I felt like I was gonna leak. But because that abandoned store we saw entering? The gate was up about a few feet and I swear I saw someone on the other side. I looked to Gilda.

"Wait... guard senses tingling here. And I aint talking about a stiff soldier tingling...."

"You sure it's not that and you're just getting paranoid again?" I huffed.

"Trust me, guard feelings and paranoid feelings are honestly different sides there." I looked around for security but didnt see any. I looked back to Gilda. "Go to one of these nearby stores, ask them if one can call security to this place. I'll be waiting out front." She sighed and nodded before we broke off going our separate ways. I waited for a few minutes until Gilda came back. She told me she called for security and when they got here, I asked if I could take a look after flashing my badge. Told me I could but to be quick. Even gave me a flashlight to use since their electricity was cut. Gate was busted too since- surprise surprise - some idiot jammed something in there and they try to make the inside of this place a regular spot for patrols. Mall director should be getting a permit to work on it any day now.

Once inside I looked around. Empty racks, naked mannequins and dusty display cases remained in this otherwise mostly empty store. Escalator was in the dead center and not moving. It was unsettling and if I hadnt wet myself already, this probably would've done it. Only lights you could see were exit signs that arent directly connected to section power and what windows werent covered by plywood. First floor was clear. Even checked first level fitting rooms. Empty. Found nothing but clothes that were left over. Nothing that I'd even wanna take but I very well could ask about getting those mannequins to Rarity for a small fee.... Give her a little replacement for the ones that break because she rages in the middle of trying to get one of her outfits to look good. Seriously its a good thing she takes her rage out on the mannequins and not Sweetie.... She'd be having to stay with us for a while because Rarity would just HATE herself if she even laid a hand on Sweetie Belle in a fit of rage. Same with me and AJ.... Though if you hit our sisters, expect something from us.... unless you're their age... whatever. When I went upstairs it was pitch black and I felt like I was in a horror movie... Like anything could jump me at any minute. Shined the flashlight all over. Dust, cobwebs... hopefully not spider webs... on racks and shelving that was left over. I went forward until I was in what was left of the electronics and home machines. Nothing but cardboard and bent hangers. But that's when something sent a chill up my spine. "Ryder.... I'm sorry...." I heard a soft voice say to me... soft but... oh so fucking familiar and it scared the ever loving SHIT out of me... I'm one for aliens and apparent 'end-of-the-world' prophecies but ghosts? That's something I didnt really believe... well... until now... I waved my flashlight around and just looked for movement.

"Wh-Who's there?" I saw nothing but empty shelving.

"Dont you recognize my voice? The one you've loved for so long...."

"I recognize your voice but this has to be some trick... You're dead and I was the one who gave you the two tickets straight to hell!"

"Forgive me please.... my endless, tormented soul has had enough...."

"The hell I will!" I swear I kept turning around flashing that flashlight like a fucking maniac. Sounded like Berrie was right on top of me.

"Please.... Its the only way I can return.... My soul is stapled to this mortal plane...."

"FUCK OFF!" Oh I started running but things were thrown at me, shelving units moved blocking my way until I was forced in a corner. Oh I was freaking the fuck out. My flashlight started flickering before she appeared. She was dressed in what she died in. Skin tight jeans, trench coat, rain boots and her mane a bit of a mess. No holes but her eyes? Whited out. Completely. She approached and knelt down caressing my cheek. Temperature dropped drastically. Like I was sitting right in front of an AC unit in the snow.

"Ryder please.... You know you still love me...."

"NO! FUCK OFF LEAVE ME ALONE!" I took a few swings at her obviously to no avail. And right quickly she disappeared. I just sat there hugging myself the light illuminating the corner. I just sat there freaking out.

I felt like I was just sitting there forever before flashlights on the roof. "Ryder? Ryder! Ryder where are you?!" I heard Gilda call out.

I saw the lights point over my way. "Over there! The corner!" I heard a security guard say. I waited in my position for a bit before I saw Gilda vaulting the shelves before hugging me tight.

"God dweeb are you alright?" She looked me over and checked everything. Arms, legs, ears, wings... "Shit dude.... Wings are frizzing out! Are you good?"

I swallowed. "G-Get me out of here.... I need to go to the castle.... NOW" I said. She nodded and helped me up, handing the flashlight to the security guards who took it. We had to go out the doors to the abandoned store and wait for Pinkie and Dash out there. Security said they'd get the footage of what happened, see what I saw and what happened. Gilda told them to contact her if they find anything. Because they knew I couldnt pull those stupid shelves close on my own... or at least they didnt know I could.

When we got into the van I had to be put in the back with Gilda. Dash was back there as well while Pinkie drove. Dash held me up in the middle of the van floor. "What the FUCK happened?" She asked. "I'm trying on clothes with Pinkie and then I get a call from Gilda saying you went and tried going after a trespasser only to have you screaming and wet in a corner?"

"I... I saw her.... She... She's dead but I saw her.... I... I just... I dont understand...." Dash looked to Gilda.

"I havent seen him this scared for a while.... He's not even this visually upset unless something happened...."

Gilda huffed looking at her new toy. "He's been jumpy since we got this thing... Thinking someone is following us, swearing someone was in that empty store...." She said. "Found him in the corner with shelves protecting him.... Thing is we heard just one loud noise of those things being moved and we swore something collapsed so we know he couldnt have done that on his own." She looked up to the front. "Pinkie! Head to a diaper shop for him! He's almost soaked through!"

I felt the van turn a bit. "Okie dokie lokie!" She said. Gilda looked back to me.

"Alright... We're gonna go in, grab your diapers and change you.... Anything you want Dash to do while we get you changed?"

I swallowed a lump in my throat. "....L-L-Luna...." I said. Was all I could muster up from how frightened I was. When we got to the shop only me and Gilda went in. Paddy gave us a free 'sample' for me to change into then selling me a big pack. Didnt question it, didnt ask anything more, just got us in to change and get more. Not long after we got to the Castle and Gilda and a guard had to carry me in a medics cot because I was too scared to move.

Dash walked along side us. "Alright, your mother is still on her way, AJ is dealing with the girls, Luna is on her way as well to check what's going on with you." She said. "As for you, we're putting you in Twilight's safe room. Gonna have Gilda in there with you, you're gonna have some soothing music, lights dimmed and some oils to help you calm down. Do what ever, breathe deep and try to get yourself calmed. If you feel like you're gonna get sick there should be a bathroom in there and if you're not able to get there in time, just.... try to do it where its not gonna get in the way and you're not gonna step in it..."

Gilda glanced at me and huffed. "Why dont you just get a head start and breathe Ry?" She asked. I swallowed and just nodded before taking shakey breaths. "There we go..." She looked back to Dash. "Uh.... Once we're in there do you think you can bring us snacks or something?"

The guard carrying me in front cleared his throat. "We are able to bring food in yes but Princess Twilight has her own snack storage inside for long term stays inside." He said. "Once inside, I'll show you."

That walk felt long and just.... Frightening. I was just staring off into one direction... I was just thinking her face would just pop up into the doorways or she would just be standing down one of the halls, watching.... waiting... Dash checked her phone once or twice during that whole thing thing, even sent a few texts off. Didnt know if it was Luna or Twilight she was texting. Didnt really wanna know. When we got to the safe room Gilda and I were put inside. She had to hoist me up onto the bed inside. Room was about half the size of her room outside. Ham radio on a desk, small library inside, bed off to the side, bathroom connected with sound proofing panels all over the room. Cooler popped up from the floor at the other side of the room. Gilda just brought me over a tea and a small bag of chips and sat with me on the bed as Dash turned on another little radio making it play calming music and sounds of ocean waves. Gilda and I cuddled for a while after our snacks which I ate hesitantly. After a while Princess Luna arrived. I only knew once she opened up that saferoom door and came in only to kneel down at my side of the bed. She rested a hand on my shoulder. "Ryder.... I'm going to put you to sleep here and check what's going on in your mind...." She said softly as to not wake Gilda. "I need to ask however do you wish to just have a distraction or do you want me to bring someone along while I go over everything?"

I swallowed. "....L-Let me come with you.... Bring Gilda... Please...." I said. She nodded and I saw her horn glow and soon after I was asleep. Once asleep I met with her in a blank dreamscape. I was in armor. Full set of plated armor, leggings, boots chest plate and arms. No helmet. She sighed and took my hand before a door sprang up from the darkness in front of us.

"From what Dash and Applejack have told me you apparently experienced some kind of dream last night and saw something this morning reminding you of your dead ex. And apparently it had you scared into needing to be carried here... It's something that just seems so out of the ordinary for you... You're in love with Applejack, you married her and are having a kid... why the sudden thoughts?" I swallowed.

"...I dont know.... I just.... I had a dream where uh.... Gilda, AJ and uh... Daring were... giving a show and... she just showed up to finish the job... " I blushed hard. She sighed.

"Alright... That dream sounded normal until your ex showed up.... Let me go get Gilda real quick and we can begin." I nodded as she released my hand. I watched as she went through the door. I looked around in the dark making sure Berrie wasnt anywhere, tainting what was left of my sanity. She came back moments later with Gilda who ran up and hugged me. She was wearing some raider armor. Tattered leather jacket, metal signs and pieces as shoulder pauldrons, armor for the torso and some more for kneepads over her jeans and boots.

Gilda sighed breaking the hug. "Good... You're asleep.... That's good...." She said. She looked to Luna. "Princess I... I'm worried about this...." Luna huffed as the door went away.

"We're only here to check what's going on in Ryder's head... make sure he's not just seeing things. If he is I'm gonna wake you up and dig deeper. If not... I'm not really sure where we go from there...." She shuttered a bit before turning into the darkness. "Alright... First up... Ryder's dream from last night." Her horn glowed and things started changing around us. Poles sprang up from the ground and a stage rose underneath them, fully stocked bar just beyond that and a few speakers with a DJ booth straight on the other side and then where I sat. She looked back at me. "Alright Ryder. Walk me through what happened."

I nodded and broke away from Gilda before going over to the chair. "Well..." I started hesitantly. "...First I was here enjoying my little show with the mares in my life..." Just off to the side the dream Gilda, Applejack and Daring appeared, all wearing their lingerie.

Gilda walked over to herself, grabbed her own breasts and compared them to her own. "...I... My tits arent THAT big...." She said. "But uh.... Glad to see you think of me having some good sized ones.... I guess...." I blushed and sighed looking over to the otherside.

"Everything was fine and dandy with them doing their thing.... but... Then they all disappeared.... I was strapped down to the chair and gagged... Couldnt move, couldnt yell... couldnt do anything." A mannequin sat itself in the chair wearing exactly what I was.... And apparently it had a strapon attatched. "That's when she appeared and rode me like I was going at it with Applejack." Off to the otherside of the mares appeared Berrie. She was still wearing that skimpy leather outfit. "I just... I felt violated.... Didnt want her to touch me at all..."

Luna huffed as she made the mares and the mannequin dissolve into dust. "Huh.... Well I agree... Its still unpleasant getting grabbed, poked and prodded in your dreams against your own will.... Especially with everything you've been through with Changelings..." She said. She sat down in the chair. "Anything else you remember from that dream or is that it?"

"That's it..." She hummed.

"So... She just shows up uninvited to your.... show.... and forces herself upon you?" I nodded. "Alrighty then... Now... From what Dash told me you guys went to the mall. It was supposed to be peaceful yet along the way you said you saw something. What was it?"

"Her car... Berrie's car... License plate and all...." She got up and got right next to us before snapping her fingers and putting us in a bubble... Oh do NOT get me started on when I asked what happened if mom and dad didnt die. The environment immediately changed after that into the street we were on before we got to the mall. Few cars around us formed, dummies in the seat except for my car. I was just sitting in the front seat. We floated above the road before the scene around us played out. We saw cars moving until I saw the car that had the plate. Grabbed Luna's hand and pointed. "There." Everything paused and we floated down towards the car. Sure enough the plate and the window sticker matched what hers was. "This is it... Exactly what I saw...." Luna hummed as the bubble popped leaving us on the road staring at it.

Gilda gripped my hand and looked at me. "....This is what you saw?" She asked. I nodded. "Wow... Guess... Guess I owe you an apology...." I looked to Gilda.

"No need but.... You're gonna wanna... Hold me tight when we do the mall...."

Luna looked back at us after she inspected the empty drivers seat.... Strange. "What happened at the mall?" She asked. I swallowed.

"Just.... Get this over with... You'll see." She nodded and joined back with us. The environment around us changed again this time into that dark abandoned store. She used her magic and shot a ball of light at the wall where it stuck.

"Alright.... Tell me what happened here."

"I was downstairs.... Actually out in the mall and we were going to find Pinkie and Dash for lunch though my guard senses started telling me something... That there was someone in here. So I came in and started looking.... Security guards gave me the clear, gave me a flashlight and I went and started looking around in places to hide, even checked upstairs considering the doors entering from the outside were locked and boarded up... Though once I got up here...." I walked over to the side with Gilda close by. Luna followed hesitantly and the dream played out but in silence. We watched as I came up the stairs and looked around only to start freaking out, talking to the darkness before heading to the corner where the shelves suddenly moved by themselves. I could feel Gilda jump a bit before holding onto me. Luna just looked at everything shocked as the dream paused.

"That's... There is definitely something sinister going on here...." She hurried over to the corner and just looked in. We did too yet all we saw was me just cowering in the corner, the light flickering but nothing else. "Aha.... This explains why there's no driver in the car and nopony here... You're being haunted by your murderous ex. Tell me, did she say anything?"

"Sh-She.... She told me that.... she was wanting to be set free.... forgiven... But she's in hell... she's burning for all eternity! She doesnt deserve forgiveness for what she did.... I want her to suffer... suffer, burn and die... over and over and over again...."

"Now that is something strange because if i recall correctly she was burning, trapped in her own personal hell.... and you beat the hell out of her... Same with Scootaloo.... She shouldnt be able to manifest if she's already taken to her afterlife...." She looked to us. "We might need to take an extra trip here.... Are you willing to come with me and confront father?"

"If it means I dont have to see her again I'll go... and after last time I'll hold my tongue, let you do the talking..." She looked to Gilda.

"Gilda. I'm going to need you to wake up and leave the room... you look like you've seen enough.... I would also advise you to let Dash know what you've seen."

Gilda huffed. "...Princess... I'll do this but you make sure he doesnt come back with a demon up his ass." She said. Luna nodded and I gave Gilda a hug before she faded in my arms and the dream returned to a blank state. Luna looked to me and huffed.

"She doesnt know what demons have already attached themselves to you.... personal or otherwise.... Now come. Embrace and hide thine gaze.... and I will hold you to your promise of holding your tongue. You speak out of line once and you're dealing with what ever I and my sister agree upon.... Agreed?"

I sighed and walked over to her. "Agreed." I replied. "But please keep watch of your father.... He tries anything put him in check or I will... with your permission of course..."

"Now that I will agree on... Now come on." I nodded and hugged her burying my face into her waist. I heard things change around us before hearing the screams of the damned and the demonic chants. Words I couldnt speak but heard only as gibberish. I broke away and looked to Luna as we now sat in the middle of her fathers study. Book shelves around the room, two chairs in front of a fire place, a side table with a decanter of what I hoped was wine and the man himself sitting in one of the chairs, suit pants, smoking jacket and some nice shoes.... I'll give him that. We walked over slowly, me behind Luna and a tad nervous. "Father.... I need to have a word with you."

Hellfire looked at us as we came into light. Luna sat in the chair whilst I stood on the other side of her, away from him. Our eyes met and he shot a little smile. "Luna... General.... So good to have you here." He said. His voice just.... reverberated as if we were in a cave. "What is it do you need to talk with me about?"

"It has come to my attention that my General has been... encountering a spirit that has been... or at least should've been in your... 'care' ... A spirit sent to you is meant to suffer for all eternity... Not be forgiven or sent back to the realm between." He grabbed his decanter and poured his wine... Swirled it around in the light of the fire.

"I'm going to be honest... I didnt mean to set her free... There was a breakout from some of the other damned... They set her free, they were recaptured while she made a run for it.... surprisingly nimble despite the malnourishment and the countless beatings she's endured...." He glanced at me. "Tell me General.... Do you remember what she did in life for her to be that fast?"

Luna looked to me and gave a nod. I huffed. "She used to do a lot of sports.... Tennis, swim.... Anything to test her endurance...." I said.

"And what did she do to torment you.... because I do assume that's why you're here...."

"And you would be correct.... She's appeared in my dreams, on the road and even in an abandoned mall store, cornering me asking for forgiveness.... That bitch doesnt deserve forgiveness.... If I could draw her blood again I would just to make sure she stays down here...." He hummed as he sipped his drink.

"...If you will accept my advice I think that's a wonderful idea... Something you must do and you alone... no guards, no intervention from my daughters nor from the friends you hold dear... Come midnight, you return to where you found her spirit... Normally burning the place would help but considering this situation and a certain.... entity... you possess... you might be able to use her to your advantage...."

Luna looked back at her father with a quizzical look. "Entity...? You mean Schrivechnya?" She asked.

"Precisely my daughter. You see... She sought to stay on that mountain long ago after a cult in the caves tried to summon me for their bidding.... I sent Schrivechnya and... well... lets say there was nothing left of them.... but as she was summoned she couldnt return unless returned to me yet I choose not to have you return her to me..." He stood up. "...You will need all the help you can get...." And with that he started walking away. Luna stood and stared at her father while I stayed behind her... frightened actually.

"Father! What do you mean by that?" He didnt answer. Just went to the door and left us. Luna looked back at me. "Ryder. I'm waking you up. I'll find out what he's talking about if he says anything at all... Just dont be afraid of whatever is going on... Keep confidence and I'll find you after you're out of that saferoom...."

I nodded and watched as everything faded. When I woke up the room was now dimly lit, only lit by the lamp on the table with the ham radio. The oil diffuser was turned off and I was alone. I huffed and sat up grabbing my pants (which I assumed Gilda took off me to make sure I wasnt wet) and just looked straight ahead. "Schrivechnya..." I said. I waited a moment only to hear a flush from the bathroom. As I looked over I saw the dog walk out and over to me where she sat down looking at me, her glazed white eyes actually being somewhat of a comfort. "Well... You're toilet trained and that's good.... Just uh.... Hope you didnt leave anything for the Princess to find..." She barked a little. "Alright alright... but it seems we have a job to do later.... Seems daddy left you an escaped soul to find..." She licked her lips and growled a bit. "Yep.... Maybe I'll see about giving you a treat later when we're done... not sure what you want as a treat but... Hoping some peanut butter dog biscuits are good enough for you...." She barked again wagging her tail. "Good... Now hide until I call upon you again..." She barked once more before running back into the bathroom and disappearing. Even made sure she didnt make a mess that I'd get blamed for.

After that I left the safe room, and went and got changed out of my padding. Into some different clothes. Had to take the jacket stolen from the elites as well but I had to take logos off... Rarity replaced them with rank patches and such. Rank patches, Ponyville guard patches and some other approved decals that I had to run through Celestia who paid Rarity to destroy the elite patches. She didnt question it, she thought they were gawdy and... edgy to say the least and agreed to their destruction. I went and spent time with my mother, told Gilda what was going on and told her to come with me as well as requested a few guards to drive us there. Luna came to me during that time, talked with me alone telling me that all he could say was something was coming and events set it in motion. Didnt specify what, didnt specify how to stop it.... He strangely even said he respects my dislike for him and understands it but still welcomes me if I need to blow off steam but Luna made it clear to him that he is to not offer me anything unless it benefits me in someway if I do end up wanting to beat the everloving shit out of something or someone. As we got closer to the mall Gilda looked to me. "Ryder.... I..." She started. I huffed cutting her off.

"It's okay.... You didnt know...."

Luna rested a hand on my shoulder. "You are stable after that right?" She asked. I nodded. "If you have any nightmares about anything, Berrie, death, ANYTHING you call me straight away after you wake up. Understood?"

"Yes Princess."

"Good. Now what's going to happen is you're going in there alone. I've contacted the mall director and they've left a side door open and are guarding it just to make sure nobody sneaks in. We're giving you at least a half hour in there before I send Gilda in to drag you back out. If you succeed you should be out within that time.... If not, Gilda is coming in."

"Understood. I'll have this done as fast as I can."

Gilda shuttered a bit. "I swear when we get back to that castle, I want you in my bed and we do what ever... Dont think I can sleep without someone after the shit I saw earlier...." She said.

"And lets hope the wife allows me to get in there for a cuddle... She's been a bit grabby lately..."

From there we sat in silence until we got to the mall. Security was outside but the Princess and the guards made the security disperse as I went in Gilda just stayed in the truck. I was given a flashlight again, this one being a guard one. Heavy, bright LED... Very durable too just in case weather decides to fuck you over. I looked around where I was as I made my way to the escalator... Something about it being midnight and the mannequins make this even creepier. Felt like some of them were even staring at me. Wouldnt doubt they were. Saw display cases with nothing more than a dead rat in one.... Spider webs here and there too in a few that werent busted. I went back upstairs and went and walked around only to find a customer service desk. Registers were still there, some still open, others locked up tight... not that I tried to check anyways. I hopped up onto the counter and sat there looking around. Waiting. Only took a few minutes for the cold feeling to take over. The flashlight started flickering again too. "...Ryder... You need to make a choice...." I heard her say. "I deserve better than what I've been through... Why dont you see it that way?" I didnt reply. Just waited for her to show herself. And even though she hadnt appeared yet I could hear Schrivechnya growling. "Ryder please! I dont wish to suffer anymore! Forgive me, set me free and we can be together again...." I huffed.

"There are things that I can forgive... I can forgive stealing my stuff only to return it when I'm not looking... I can forgive borrowing my stuff and breaking it or losing it.... I can forgive even running away because it was my own damn fault. But once you take a life and you try to take others for the sake of love, that's unforgivable.... You got what you deserved... If you were brought back, full body and everything... I wouldnt hesitate to use slugs, explosive rounds and if I have to shove your head into a fucking wood chipper I would.... Go on, show yourself. Let me see your anguish... Manifest you fucking whore." Oh and that triggered her a bit. I was attacked and pinned to the countertop. She appeared and she was pissed.

"I AM NO WHORE! Unlike that mare you went and protected..."

"Oh sure you are!" My cocky ass said. "The difference between you and her is that I paid you... You pay whores for love, and I paid you with two shots.... I didnt pay her for anything. By the way.... You wanna meet my dog?" Oh this was enjoyable. The look on her face turned from angered to scared and before I knew it Schrivechnya came out of nowhere and tore her off of me. She screamed a bit as the dog bit at her arm not letting it go... "Oh look! She likes you! Schrivechnya! One by one... On my command..." I got up off the counter and snapped my fingers. She took off her arm leaving just a stump of flesh looking torn apart, that arm completely gone. "That's for my cousins bike tires...." I snapped again. There goes a leg. "That's for my new family's truck." I snapped again. Other leg. "That's for my mother." Another snap. Another arm. "That's for my father... And this.... a reminder for you that if I see you again, spirit or flesh... I wont hesitate again.... Now die and stay dead!" I snapped my fingers one last time and her head was clean off before her torso disappeared Schrivechnya looked to me and just panted, wagging her tail happy. "Good girl. Now why dont you go see Daddy for a treat? I think he misses you." She whimpered a little bit. "Dont worry. I aint giving you up. Just thinking he'd like to see you for a bit... Maybe congratulate you on a job well done better than what I can.... I can still give you a treat next time I can. Think he knows you better than I can. Just make sure you let me know when you're back but dont go scaring my sisters alright?" She let out a little yip and I just watched her go and run off before disappearing behind a pillar. I dusted myself off and picked up my flashlight before going downstairs. As I went towards the door I took a look at one of the mannequins and hummed. Then went straight to the doors. Dunno if it was the faceless, clothesless plastic looking pony or what had just happened but a chill went up my spine.

As I walked out I saw Gilda and Luna flying about with both guards watching the door, backs against the truck. They saluted me just as I motioned for a drink and sat down against the wall. One of them ducked in to the truck and came out with a can of juice. He tossed it to me and I just cracked it open and sipped from it. Didnt take long for Gilda to notice and land next to me kneeling down and hugging me. "RYDER!" She said sounding excited. I sighed hugging her being mindful of my drink.

Luna came down and landed next to me. "She got nervous waiting so I had to fly with her and keep her occupied." She said. "I take it things went well?"

I nodded sipping my drink awkwardly over Gilda's shoulder. "Yeah... She's gone.... Just.... Next time I need to blow off steam.... I think you know where I wanna go..." I said. She nodded giving a sigh. "Alright... I think we're gonna sit here for a bit... Calm down.... That was... that was definitely something I dont want to make a habit of...."

"And yet you touch the spirit world every time you do something stupid... either that or you miss mommy and daddy... Speaking of which.... I may have an opportunity soon for you to have another dinner. Maybe give your family a chance to know they're getting a grandfoal." I sighed looking up at the night sky.

"I think they'd like that. As long as it could probably be at home so they can see how well we're doing." She smiled and nodded. Anyways we sat there for about... I dont know fifteen minutes? Half hour? Gilda ended up passing out and needed to be carried back upstairs when we got back to the castle. Had to get her padded before anything because I didnt want her freaking out if she did wet herself. I still felt a bit uneasy about what Luna said though... about her father saying I'll need all the help I can get... Well... What ever it is, I hope I can stop it without killing myself.