Before we begin, I would like to thank Sorakun555 and Yuki Harima for giving me a big deal of help on this story.
I am way more worried about posting this than I should be...
Disclaimer: I do not own My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic. It belongs to The Hub, Hasbro, Studio B, and Lauren Faust. I do not own any of these characters in any way or how, nor do I claim ownership to the pony franchise. These characters are simply my toys.
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"Here we go again…"
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Crossroad
Chapter 1: Twilight Sky
“Now Mac… Ah know you’re big fer yer age, but ya gotta remember that since you are a lot stronger for such a young lad, ya gotta protect the ones ya care about with that strength! And don’t ya dare think of bullyin’ the weak with it!”
“Who am ah supposed to protect, Pa?”
“Well… I suppose that’s fer ya to decide.”
What was really worth protecting?
This thought crossed the mind of Big Macintosh on a whim as he found himself looking up at the cloud covered sky. It was too dark for most ponies to be outside at this time of night, while also too light for the stubborn stallion to admit it was time to gallop home before it became pitch black. The orange rays of light echoing down on him told him he had about twenty minutes at most before the moon would be his only guide.
The red stallion blinked his emerald green eyes as the quickly fading final rays of a dying evening began to disperse. He let out a small sigh, watching it vanish as suddenly as it appeared. He was quickly reminded of the bitter cold winds he had been running back and forth from the entire day, attempting to quickly sell off the remaining apples while also keeping enough rations in the rare case of emergency. He had only managed to get fifty bits for two barrels of apples; he could already tell Applejack would scold him sooner or later for the small change hung in the pouch wrapped around his horse collar.
His mind quickly wandered back to that conversation tucked firmly in the back of his mind, its voice loud and proud. Maybe it was the fact that nothing around him could distract him that the question kept popping up in his mind as of late. Even in a street with mares and stallions racing to get home before night fell upon them where there was plenty to look at for amusement, his mind refused to shake these simple words.
“Did you ever find the one you care enough to protect?”
For some reason, this specific thought popped into the large stallion’s mind. The more he thought about it, the more difficult it became to decipher whether it was a memory, or something he came up with by himself. Right now it seemed the only way to properly describe it was a thought, an idea, not yet reality.
Big Macintosh felt a shiver run down his spine as words began to grumble from his mouth. This one question had been nagging him more and more recently. At times he almost managed to convince himself that he was right in answering yes, that he had protected his family for years on end from hunger and the harsh seasons. He had done his fair share of helping them, of making sure they survived.
Although…
Big Macintosh took a moment to cease his thoughts as a loud breeze began to ruffle his mane. He let his mind wander for quite some time about this question, standing still on the path, looking out in the distance at the almost black sky, the first starts of the night beginning to appear.
Although… at other times, that question seemed nearly impossible to answer. It wasn’t exactly like it had just sprung up from nowhere. It might have just been a gradual build up over many years suddenly reaching a peak. The only way for him to properly put it into words was that lately he had been viewing a rainbow for quite some time. The rainbow itself was pretty enough, and a joy to look at… but it was missing a color. The worst part was that he couldn’t envision the color. It was as if the color didn’t exist yet still somehow belonged in that rainbow.
Another breeze began to blow on his face, the harsh winds ripped his eyes like thorns of a rose, forcing him to squeeze them shut as the stallion allowed only his memory to guide him. He could hear the familiar sound of winds whistling through the barren trees, the same it always did this time of year. It was always the same sounds, the same atmosphere...
It was as the sound that wasn’t the same as usual hit his ears. The sound itself was sharp, unexpected in this dead of the night as its waves rippled across the land, sudden enough to force the large stallion’s legs to seize up for a brief moment, yet quiet enough where it took him a moment to realize what the sound itself was.
A high-pitched scream echoed in the distance.
Big Macintosh, who had screeched to a halt when the sound had first entered his range of hearing, before acting on his panicked nerves, he noticed that the scream, while frightful, was not that of fright, but shock or surprise. It took a moment for the initial panic to leave him as he realized just how unlikely it was that somepony would be attacked around here, so close to Sweet Apple Acres.
The stallion found his eyes widening as he took a three-sixty around the area, ears twitching as he attempted to determine the location of the scream. Perhaps it was on pure instinct alone that his hooves left the familiar path after only a brief moment of hesitation into the unknown darkness that awaited him before he began galloping in the direction where the piercing cry had come from.
Big Macintosh struggled to see in the darkness that had now invaded the trees he was immersing himself into. His mind asked a million questions, should he get help, should he attempt to be wary in the rare case danger was indeed ahead. Even though his mind kept flinging these questions at him, his body only focused on one.
Where in Equestria was the owner of that cry?
It was just as Big Macintosh took yet another blind step in the darkness did he feel his own body begin tumbling over as his hoof only met air. His own throat let a similar scream of panic escape as the world began tumbling around him, spinning and whirling for what seemed like an eternity.
When the snow covered ground finally did meet his face, he found himself grunting in pain. He was starting to feel stupid for waddling around in the dark like a big dumb idiot. He grumbled to himself as he shakily got to his hooves before glancing behind him. He had fallen at least five or six feet on the small cliff. It was dangerous to be walking around here in the daytime, much less night.
Big Macintosh grumbled as he planned to find his way out of the forest that very moment simply to search for somepony to help him or at the very least a light source to illuminate two feet in front of him.
That was until a low-pitched, hardly noticeable sound to anypony not paying attention rang in his ears. Big Macintosh found himself shaking his head, positive it was the grunting of a stallion close by. It didn’t take him long to piece together the stallion had likely fallen down here himself, likely suffering a worse fate than being shaken up.
“Hello?” He called out, hoping for a quick reply for which he didn’t receive.
“Ya ain’t hurt, are ya?” The steed asked once more to the soft sound of grunting. His hooves began to move in the direction ever so slowly, not wanting to step on and crush the non-responding pony in the darkness.
A sickening smell of iron quickly filled Big Macintosh’s nose before he clamped a hoof over his face. His stomach began to feel nauseated as it twisted and turned in his belly. It took him less than five seconds to race to find the bleeding body, nearly crashing into it as he turned the corner.
What caught the emerald eyes of the stallion off the bat was the giant gash on the forehead of the tan colored stallion. It was bleeding exceptionally; the sight on its own was making the stallion weak in the legs. His eyes quickly scanned a tree near the upper half of the stallion, a line of red trailing down the bottom half. Perhaps his face crashed head first into the bark, slicing his forehead open.
“H-Hey, partner?” Big Macintosh let his voice stutter as he got down on his belly to get a closer inspection at face of the steed before him, pushing his bloody brown bangs from his face.
Big Macintosh’s eyes widened. His jaw dropped ever so slightly as he looked at the pale face of the pony before him. Only one name could fit him, only one voice rang in his mind, screaming the name.
“C…Caramel?”
Darkness filled the vision of the light blue stallion.
The dimness itself was a pretty safe place at the moment. It was a place where his mind could finally stop the deep pounding, a place where the screaming that still rang loud and clear in his ears dully died down to a simple hum. He could forget the aching pain in his wings, forget that he was ready to pass out, forget his belly kept rumbling in hunger even though he felt so sick.
Soarin slowly lowered his upper leg from his large eyes. He whimpered softly as he let his wings stretch out from under the bench his back was lying on. The noise of his squad team seemed very distant at this moment. It was almost like he was in the next room over as the echo filled chattering sounded like garble to him and nothing else.
But the stallion knew he wasn’t alone, no matter how much he wanted to be. It was almost hard to allow himself to sit up, grumbling as a few stray wings brushed against the uniform covering most of his body. He felt cramped, constricted. He wanted so very badly to have a room of his own, at least five feet of room without suffocating.
The pegasus quickly ran a hoof through his mane, which was sticking out in every which direction thanks to his various ups and downs for the past few hours. He closed his eyes once more, trying to keep the nausea down as his mind tried to convince him he was indeed still falling from three hundred feet above the ground, ready to smack down face first onto the hard, unforgiving earth bellow.
“Still getting sick over a little bit of flying, aren’t you?” The teasing voice hit Soarin’s erect ears in such a playful way that he didn’t even bother to turn around as a body landed on his back, leaning on him with all of its weight.
“Shut up, Rapidfire…” The pegasus hissed, attempting to shake off the stallion before a leg was swung around his neck, locking the grey steed into place as Soarin grumbled out a few more curses. “Not in the mood…”
“Aww, look who’s being an anal little asshole, how cute.” The words left the mouth of the stallion so easily that Soarin honestly had to question if he heard those words correctly. Then again it was indeed Rapidfire talking to him, not just any random Wonderbolt.
Soarin rolled his eyes as he slowly dragged the goggles from his face down around his neck, Rapidfire finally releasing him. He could sense the gray stallion was holding his tongue by the way he was shifting every few moments, knowing that his friend was indeed in a bad mood.
“Sooo…” Rapidfire said, turning his body as he began to swing his legs off the floor like a child would. “What’s biting you, dude? I know you’re hungry after shows and grumpy when you’re tired… But you’re giving off an “I’ll kill you if you bucking touch me” vibe.”
Soarin shrugged as he pulled the top of his uniform from his head, letting it hand like a hoodie on his back as he rubbed his temples with a spare hoof. “Just… a lot of things…” He murmured, more to himself. “Maybe… it’s that this tour thing is getting to me… moving every other day and all…” Soarin kept silent for several moments. “And I’m worried that Brae might not have been able to get into the hotel…”
“Ah…” Rapidfire said, adjusting his poufy white mane before crossing his upper legs, a smirk across his face as he stared at the vice-captain’s back. The older pegasus began to speak in a tone that on the surface did indeed seem quite serious. “I see, wanting to have passionate alone time with your little country lover who you haven’t seen in days!” The steed wrapped his arms around himself as his upper body began to wiggle. “After Celestia knows how many hours of teasing, your bodies will move against one another as he screams from the top of his lungs “Aaaaapleoosa” in perfe-”
Soarin at last turned his body, eyes narrowed in a glare at the steed behind him. He looked as if he might indeed hit the poorly comedic stallion if he didn’t shut his trap soon, for indeed many ponies were looking at them oddly at the moment.
The gray stallion cut his sentence short with an awkward giggle before lifting a hoof to clear his throat in embarrassment. “I mean… yeah, I guess I would be worried about my coltfriend too if we were in the same situation… if I liked colts…” His cheeks blushed ever so slightly, as if he realized just how into the scenario he had gotten.
“Yeah, whatever.” Soarin growled out as he struggled to move the rubber outfit to around his waist.
“I’m serious man!” Rapidfire grumbled, reaching out his hooves to help Soarin pull down the uniform. “I know that if I were either of you, I wouldn’t be able to handle being apart so much.”
“Not helping, featherbrain.” Soarin grumbled, closing his eyes as he began to shake his head.
“Sorry…” Rapidfire mumbled, clicking his hooves together as he waited for Soarin to respond further. However the longer he waited, the more and more the vice-captain seemed to zone out of the situation, as if his thoughts were far more important than anything at hoof. His undressing became slower and slower until he finally stopped all together, a leg still entangled in the rubber suit. The gray stallion finally decided to speak up again. “Dude… shouldn’t you be going home soon, Brae might have to stay up all night waiting for you…”
Soarin shrugged, seeming to come back to reality. He was silent for several moments, gnawing on his lower lip as his body swayed back and forth in place. He began to place his thoughts into words.
“I’m not really sure why… but I… I don’t want to go home all that badly…”
“W…What?” Rapidfire asked, cocking up a brow. As Soarin got off of the bench to leave, the gray pegasus kept close eye on him, a questioning look still on his face as he stared at the other walk away without another word, getting lost in the remaining crowd of Wonderbolts.
“What was that about?” Rapidfire questioned the empty space where the light blue pegasus had previously been seated.
Big Macintosh looked calm on the outside. The same board poker face he had always kept on his face remained plastered as usual. The only sign of movement he made after realizing just who this hurt stallion was… was to press his hoof gently on the gash against the pony’s tan forehead, just enough to stop the bleeding. To any bystander, he might just look like a pony helping a stranger.
A shiver began to travel down from the bottom of his neck to the tip of his orange tail. The red stallion may have been cold and collective on the outside, but his insides were screaming at him in excitement, fear, worry, desperation, any and every feeling under the blazing sun.
“Uh…” The sound left Big Mac’s mouth as he reached out yet another hoof, gently poking the tan pony’s soft and squishy cheek. “C-Caramel?” He said the name once again. It felt so bizarre to say that name once again. It was so extraterrestrial to his tongue after so long, not exactly unwelcoming… just… different.
As the stallion leaned in closer to get a closer look at the cut, he found himself wincing as a sharp pain dug into his hoof. He lifted his own hoof, watching intently as a single drop of blood began to soak up in his red coat, blending in almost perfectly. He glanced at the spot where he had leaned on, eyes finally somewhat adjusting to the thick darkness encasing the two.
The ground was wet, and reeked of a scent that only screamed in the red stallion’s mind as a type of alcohol for which he couldn’t pinpoint. He gently placed his hoof down once again, this time feeling for the thing that poked him.
His red hoof ran across something sharp and smooth, and also the feeling of a thin paper, most likely a paper bag. It took Big Macintosh only a moment to come to the conclusion that Caramel had been carrying a bag full of alcohol, and they had broken sometime when he fell.
The red stallion blinked several times, gnawing on the inside of his lip as his blank expression faded for a single moment, showing genuine concern for the tan pony.
“Didn’t ya move away years ago?” Big Macintosh mumbled to the unconscious pony who didn’t respond. “What are ya doin’ here?”
Yes… that was a good question. He could remember the first few weeks without his old best friend picture clear, how lost he felt without that part of his life anymore.
The unconscious body of Caramel simply grunted in reply. Big Mac stared down at it for several moments before shaking his head. “No sense keepin’ ya here.” He mumbled to the stallion, deciding it would be better to sort his thoughts in some kind of light. The void of silence that he was met with was the only thing that Big Macintosh took as permission to move the body as he moved his face forward, gently pushing the body with his muzzle to move him in a better position to hoist him up.
It did indeed take a few minutes of careful observing and whimpering’s of pain before the stallion was riding limp on his back. He must really have been knocked out cold if he didn’t wake up through his whining.
“Here we go…” Big Macintosh mumbled.
Soarin was in the middle of a rather long and loud yawn as he slowly trotted through the door. His eyes opened in a droop as he smacked his lips against one another, stretching his aching wings for a moment as the door slammed shut behind him.
“Sure is bucking cold…” He said out loud. The pegasus felt a shiver run down his spine as he looked around the small hotel room, wrapping wings around himself in an almost depressing attempt to give his tired body an ounce of warmth. It was the same things as usual, a bed for sleeping and a balcony. Things he would see again fifty miles down the road.
Soarin’s green eyes were soon drawn to the terrace, where the only light in the room derived from. The falling snow only seemed to come down harder and more violently from an observing prospective. It seemed harsh, absolutely unforgiving in every manor to even the toughest of ponies.
The sight was why his mouth twisted into a frown at the sight of a bright yellow body sitting dead in the middle of the storm. He cocked his head to the side as well as his brow in an upward direction. The pegasus flapped his wings in frustration as a groan escaped his throat, hooves beginning to trot forward.
As his hoof reached the handle of the glass door, the pegasus locked his eyes on the golden mane of the stallion sitting in the middle of the blizzard. He sighed as he slowly opened the door, letting his body fall forward, only half catching himself as he let his weight shift onto the back of the yellow pony.
“Hey… Brae…” The words left his mouth in a tired sigh, hearing the half-gasp emit from the mouth of his lover. He quickly began to wrap his hooves around the yellow body, hooking around to his chest like a belt, using the golden mane in his face as a pillow. “Celestia you’re cold…” He began to mumble. “Why didn’t you go in, dummy?”
The muscles in the body of the earth pony ever so slowly relaxed, in fact they seemed to lean back into the newly found warmth. As the pegasi’s body moved up and down in quick fashion, he could determine the other gave him a shrug.
“I thought you hated the cold?”
“Ah…” Braeburn suddenly spoke his first words so Soarin in what some ways felt like an eternity, and in other ways it felt all too soon. “Ah don’t know,” He said. “Ah suppose ah lost track of time, and didn’t realize it was so late…”
Soarin blinked several times before letting a small smirk onto his face that he knew Braeburn wouldn’t see. “Waiting for me?” He asked, voice seductive as his wings draped over the yellow pony’s body ever so slowly, making sure to caress the features he stroked over. Braeburn’s body tensed and loosened at once in the middle of a whimpering grunt that was anything but upset.
“No… but really… it’s cold as buck.” Soarin grumbled out, gripping Braeburn’s body tighter as if he thought he might absorb some amount of heat from it. His breath trickled down the yellow pony's neck, causing ripples of muscles to move in Braeburn's body.
“Ah know…” Braeburn mumbled, eyes staring at the sky. His voice seemed distant, lost in his own thoughts about the falling crystals from the sky. “But… Ah like ta see all the snow. We didn’t get much back in Appleloosa…”
“Yeah… I don’t remember much… so how was the train?” Soarin asked, quickly changing the subject to something less ice cold.
Braeburn finally turned his head, Soarin getting a good look at the side of his green eye that matched his own. It seemed… a tad emotionless, as if the chuckled they previously shared didn’t happen, and he had indeed been sitting here the entire day since he arrived.
“Long.” He finally muttered. “Long and… erm… borin’”
“I um… I see.” Soarin murmured, pressing his face against the back of Braeburn’s neck. He let out a partial sigh, mostly to blow the bits of mane out of his face. Bits of melted snow met his face as he nuzzled Braeburn’s mane. “I know we haven’t seen each other much…” He confessed “And it’s rough on your traveling for days without seeing me, but we’ll manage… we always do. We’ve gone through a lot of tours before.”
“Yeah…” Braeburn mumbled. “Ah know, ah know, ah really don’t need a lecture.”
“Then… stop looking bummed out, Brae.” Soarin mumbled, half-chuckling as an attempt to mask his plea as a joke. He tightened his grip on Braeburn the tiniest bit more, as if he were afraid the other would loosen from his hold.
Braeburn didn’t reply this time, just continued to stare into the whiteout. He seemed to stay quiet for an eternity before finally speaking once again. “Ah tried ta send another letter today.” He said. “Ah just told them ah was fine and all… and… I just…” he trailed off, being lost in thought once more.
Soarin blinked several times before nuzzling his muzzle against the back of Braeburn’s neck, breathing in an apply scent that continued to linger in his nose even after exhaling. “Really Brae,” He finally whined out. “Just give it up already, they didn’t even write back when we didn’t move for a month or two.” He sat his body up, shifting his weight onto his hind.
“Ah know… Ah know!” Braeburn snapped, body tightening against the wings still adorned over his body. “Ah just… ah wanna hear from them at least once, we didn’t exactly part on good terms…”
Soarin simply began to bit his lower lip in a quick moment of brief frustration that quickly faded. Honestly, the fact that he hardly saw this pony was enough stress on him. “Well… your folks are a little… um…”
“Soar,” Braeburn said, lifting a hoof to glide down his upper leg, smoothing out his ragged fur. “Ah know they aren’t happy with me, but ah was raised ta think family was important… ah can’t help it if ah worry ‘bout them.”
“Even if they don’t give two pegasus feathers about you?” Soarin asked, tightening his wings back to his spine, pressing them to his back. He asked the question with only a hint of anger, and even then it wasn't directed at anypony within earshot. Still... this time Braeburn didn’t reply, and just sat in the same position, lost in thought once more.
“Hey buddy?” Soarin spoke up, a single thought popping into his mind.
The pegasus forced himself to stare into Braeburn’s eyes as the yellow pony finally moved his sight from the wonderland of snow. “Yeah?” He asked, his large, tired eyes staring back into Soarin’s own. They seemed like they were quite possible to become lost in, despite how hard it became to stare at them for more than a brief glace.
“I… I um…” Soarin quickly diminished his thoughts by waving a hoof in front of his face, laughing awkwardly through his teeth. “I-It’s nothing. Look, why don’t we just go inside and get warmed up for bed?”
“A-Alright…” Braeburn said, his curiosity over what Soarin wanted to say seemed to diminish rather quickly, for without hesitation or fight he started walking toward the sliding door. The pegasus waited at least ten seconds after he walked through before letting himself breathe once more.
“Do you…” Soarin began to ask, knowing full well Braeburn was out of earshot. The pegasus looked down, dragging a hoof across the thin layer of snow that had managed to blow onto the balcony sitting in the air. He grit his teeth a brief moment before shoving a large layer of snow out of his path.
“Do you regret dating a celebrity?”
Big Macintosh found his own mind wandering back to the past. It wasn’t exactly like he had anything better to think about, what with a damaged, unconscious earth pony lying on the only wooden bench around. And thinking about Caramel somehow seemed more appealing than worrying about his sister throwing a fit once he got home, or even thinking about his promise to his father.
The red stallion turned his head to the side as he stared at the large cut on Caramel’s forehead. Luckily the cut itself wasn’t too bad, it only seemed to bleed so much since the wound itself was so far up. The only real damage were a few bruises and his passing out, the worst he would have would be a headache when he woke up.
The gentle breathing discharging from the tan pony seemed very rhythmic at this time. It was the only sound besides Big Macintosh’s own heavy breathing around, and in fact it seemed quite calming despite the unchilling, unnerving night encasing the two.
Big Macintosh quietly lifted a single hoof and placed it on the belly of the tan pony. He began to trace his hoof up and down in a calming manor, a slow and steady pattern that matched the speed of his breathing.
“Are ya really Caramel?” Big Macintosh found himself asking, a hint of disbelief in his tone. “Ya really that stupid colt ah found takin’ our grub?” A small smile spread across his face, breaking the ever-lasting poker face he held plastered on the surface. Caramel seemed so much bigger than before, still tiny compared to the red steed, but still.
The red stallion shifted his rump on the snow underneath him. The bench Caramel was lying on wasn’t much, but at least the light of the moon above them helped him see his friend more clearly. The memories flooding him of his best friend filled him with both joy and worry. Just how would he react to seeing his friend, he himself wasn't even sure.
Caramel’s body suddenly shifted abnormally, and his slow breathing took a quick gasp. Big Macintosh let his tired eyes fly open as he leaned down his face a few inches to look the at sleeping stallion’s face. “Cara?” He asked, calling the pony by nickname to show he meant no harm.
A flash of blue shown on Caramel’s face as he began to open his crystal eyes. Every part of his face looked as if it were slow to catch up to his eyes, for the features remained the same as his eyes began to glance around. The eyelids of the tan pony began to blink rapidly as he grunted in pain. Wh… What…” He murmured, staring straight at the sky. He seemed to be confused as to where he was at the moment.
His eyes shot to Big Mac, whose poker face had returned as he stared blankly at the stallion before him. The eyes suddenly shot open as the rest of the universe caught up with his vision. The tan stallion squirmed as he struggled to sit up too quickly, and therefore found himself tumbling off of the bench directly face first into the snow beneath him. His body seemed to hit the ground hard, for snow flew in every which direction as he began to scramble to get back to his hooves, splashing on Big Macintosh's legs the more he simply watched and stared as the scene unraveled.
“Ah… ah… partner?” Big Macintosh asked the question as his face contorted into an odd shape, trying to decipher Caramel’s sudden panic. It seemed oddly out of place from the sleeping, quiet, even somewhat cute way he looked while sleeping just thirty second prior.
“Where… where am I?” Caramel cried out in panic, obviously it was not directed at the red stallion, but more so himself. “What… W-What happened to the bag, I-I need to get home, I n-need t-t-too...” He trailed off as his head stared directly at the ground; his breathing began to panic as his hooves groped around for the bag he had lost. He appeared to act much like a dog who was chasing its own tail, running in circles without any hope of achieving what it wants to do.
The more Big Macintosh thought about it, the more that did sound like the Caramel he knew...
“It’s still in the woods…” Big Macintosh heard himself say without thinking. He quickly found himself holding his breath for a single moment as Caramel seemed to freeze, as if only now noticing that he indeed was not the only one in the area.
Caramel’s ears pressed to his scalp as he glanced up, eyes watering with the stress he was putting himself through. He looked at the red stallion, scanning him quietly for several moments, his jaw slightly open as he panted quietly.
“M…Mac?” Caramel suddenly asked, his body loosening slightly from worry as his eyes widened. His mind seemed to be taking a moment to take in the entire situation. His watering eyes blinked several times as the tan pony shuddered from the cold. He didn’t seem to calm down… but he didn’t seem to upset himself further either. “Is…. Is that you?”
Big Macintosh realized his mouth was slightly agape as he continued to stare at the somewhat strange earth pony before him. His mind tried to piece together just exactly what happened where chaos unfolded onto the quiet area which now seemed to be ringing from the panic attack his former friend held.
It was only as Caramel began to look worried, as if he feared Big Macintosh didn't recognize him after so many years, did the stallion realize he was indeed asked a question. A wheel began to turn as he thought and thought for what it was, knowing full well he had to say something, anything. Just as Caramel's face showed the first signs of looking depressed by his friend's lack of a greeting, did Big Macintosh blurt out the only thing he could think of.
“Eeyup.”
Braeburn found himself swallowing hard as he tightened his grip on Soarin’s body. His tired eyes would occasionally begin to shut, only for him to swing them open once more with a gasp of air entering his lungs. When this happened, he would begin to gently nuzzle the blue pegasi’s chest, fighting off the whimpering that was his mind begging him to go to sleep.
But sleep almost seemed out of the question right now. The yellow pony could only cling to Soarin’s sleeping body, listening to his quiet heartbeat. He felt like a small child holding onto a teddy bear for comfort from a nightmare, or at the very least a bit of comfort.
Nothing was the same in this place. The furniture, the building, the bed, nothing in this entire city was familiar to the country pony. It all seemed for foreign to him, as if he were imprisoned in another world with no way back to how things used to be. It was frightening, horrifying almost. The only thing remotely the same was the body he seemed to hold dearly, the wings encasing him like a blanket were comforting, the familiar heartbeat ringing in his ears could only be described as a childhood lullaby.
Soarin was the only familiar thing to Braeburn in this strange, loud, cold, dangerous world... losing him would be the same as losing his mind.
“Why don’t you just go to sleep?” Soarin mumbled.
Braeburn was silent for several moments before replying. “Ah waited for ya. And ah want to spend some time with ya… greet ya when ya came here, and talk ta ya some...” He mumbled as if his voice was trying desperately not to be heard. “But… the show lasted a lot longer than ah thought.”
“Did you at least sleep well on the train?” Soarin asked, cracking open an eye as his hoof ran down Braeburn’s spine. This time Braeburn didn’t reply, and a sigh came from Soarin’s lungs as he let his hoof rest on the earth pony’s back. He wanted to say something along the lines of "What am I going to do with you" however he managed to hold his silver tongue.
“Ya’ll leave again tomorrow… aren’t ya?” The earth pony asked, voice deprived of any and all emotion. He curled up tighter seeming to be holding his breath in the case a sniffle or even a whimper might escape his body.
“I… I suppose so.” Soarin admitted begrudgingly. “This tour has really been a drag, y’know that buddy?”
“Ah’ll say.” Braeburn chuckled, his laugh dry, devoid of any sense of humor. “Ah’m working my flank off just ta sleep in the same bed with ya once or twice a week!” His body gave a single shiver before quieting down as those words left his mouth.
Soarin was quiet for some time, chuckling back with some amount of emotion. “Are you saying you miss cuddling a cranky stallion every night? Most stallions hate it when I cuddle them like that.”
Braeburn shrugged. “Ah guess ah like it.” He confessed. “Makes it a lot warmer when it snows like this.”
Soarin chuckled. “And yet you still get all embarrassed about it in public.” Soarin rolled his eyes before nuzzling the top of Braeburn’s head. He felt Braeburn hold him tighter, causing a single ripple of guilt to spread over his body. His chuckle faded, feeling forced at the last breath.
“Can ya… can ya stay up and talk like this for a little while longer… ah don’t wanna sleep just yet.” Braeburn said. “Ah don’t wanna wait another week before seein’ ya ta talk… so can ya?” He sounded embarrassed, or maybe just nervous that Soarin would decline.
Soarin was silent for a while. He shrugged once as his hoof moved up and down in a steady pattern along the yellow fur of his lover. A sigh escaped his throat as he attempted to shake off his weary sense from the long night, staring at the ceiling in place of Braeburn as his belly began to tighten.
“Sure buddy… just a while longer.” He mumbled, briefly closing his weary eyes.
No, this is not related to Entangled Pathways… I want to make that clear so people stop asking me this…
Disclaimer: I do not own My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic. It belongs to The Hub, Hasbro, Studio B, and Lauren Faust. I do not own any of these characters in any way or how, nor do I claim ownership to the pony franchise. These characters are simply my toys.
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"It’s impossible to have perfection, no matter how much one deserves it.”
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Crossroad
Chapter 2: Pathways
Soarin let a sigh escape his body as he leaned his head on a free hoof. His face began to twist into a strange look of confusion as he stared at the yellow body lying next to him. He seemed to calm down just as fast as his spark of conversation rose, for his eyes remained shut and his chest slowly rose and shrank each passing second the pegasi’s eyes bored into him.
The wonderbolt suddenly smirked, letting out a soft chuckle from his lungs. “Oh Luna, I thought I was the one who was supposed to stay up as long as I could.” Soarin spoke as his smile quickly vanished into a blank stare at the unresponsive stallion. He quietly reached forward a hoof, swishing his lover’s bangs from his face. He let out a sigh as he shook his head slowly. His mind felt ruffled from the sheer amount of chattering Braeburn managed to do in half an hours’ time. Did he want to speak on behalf of every single fan of his or something?
“I’m sorry buddy…” He whispered as he found himself leaning in, pressing his lips lightly against the other’s forehead. He attempted to keep it quick, so not to disturb the other. As he pulled away, he began to gently stroke his hoof against the other’s cheek.
“I—I know that things have been a little strange between us.” Soarin mumbled to the sleeping stallion. “I know that you and me don’t see each other much either—but I want to make things better between us, alright?” The pegasus paused. “I—I want us to make this work—it could take a little while though. So can you try and hold on, buddy?”
Braeburn’s sleeping body remained unresponsive as he shifted slightly on the uncomfortable hotel mattress that dug into the pegasi’s wings.
The pegasus frowned before shaking his head as he reached down his hoof to the edge of the blanket around his lover’s belly as he began to drag it up to the yellow pony’s neck. He watched Braeburn’s face the entire time as he made a few small movements during this process. A small smirk, and ear twitch, and finally a content smile as the warmth encased his body.
Soarin blinked several times before quietly laying down his head on his upper leg. He silently closed his eyes, and hoped that he would be able to fall asleep.
Anything was better than the guilt of looking at his lover brought him… right?
“I’m s-sorry, I-I-I didn’t mean it, please, I-I’ll go!” The shaky voice of the mysterious tan pony echoed around throughout the east section of the apple orchard as he shouted his plea, begging for forgiveness. The shrill terror in his voice was one of true fear and guilt at what he had done.
Big Macintosh cocked his head, looking out from under the brown cowpony hat atop his head. He stared at the small colt trembling against the tree in front of him. The pony himself was, well, the only word to really describe him was small. He wasn’t exactly tiny, certainly bigger than a newborn foal, however the way he curled up his body against the tree made him seem to blend into the background of the situation, appearing even tinier than reality allowed. The leaves covering the ground in brown and orange colors seemed almost to camouflage the young colt.
The red stallion didn’t say a word as he took the first step with his not-yet-stallion but at the same time no-longer-colt hooves. He took notice of just how jumpy the colt was. It seemed that as he himself got closer, the more the tan pony seemed to shrink himself into a small ball. It was almost as if the simple thought to run didn’t cross his mind.
Big Macintosh heard several leaves crunch under his hooves as he slowed his hoofsteps. He finally caught a glimpse at the pony’s face. His dirty cheeks had several lines streaking down to his neck where tears had been falling moments before. This was all from a guess however, as the red colt could only get a side glance without the other craning his face as far away as possible. The face itself seemed unfamiliar, nopony from his school quite matched the description that the colt could remember.
Big Macintosh soon was next to the colt, he waited several moments before cautiously letting his hind fall to the ground. “Ya the one makin’ so much racket?” His raspy voice asked.
The other didn’t reply, simply let out a few sniffles. Big Macintosh waited a good thirty seconds before letting himself continue. “Me and my Pa were out here gatherin’ up the rest of the pickin’s fer the year.” He said. “And we heard this loud bangin’, and some yellin’. Ya really shouldn’t swear so much. So who are ya?”
The tan pony turned away from Big Macintosh. He was shivering as he grumbled out a few words that weren’t audible to anypony but him. The red colt quickly took notice of just how the other was positioned. His hooves were tucked into his chest so that Big Mac wasn’t able to see them no matter which direction he glanced at.
Big Mac began to reach out his own hoof slowly, either to calm the other or to see his hooves he seemed to desperate to hide, he wasn’t sure. However as he rested his hoof on the tan pony’s upper leg, he was greeted with a quick shudder, muscles tightening, and the struggling of the other to shake the red colt followed by whimpering and grumbling. He held his breath to hold in any sudden sobs that might escape from his throat if he was to be left in this state.
“Can ah see them?” Big Macintosh asked in the kindest voice he could muster.
The tan colt stayed silent for a good ten seconds as his body slowly calmed itself. He began mumbling to himself as his brown mane drooped over his eyes. Through the thin cracks in his mane where his large eyes were visible, Big Macintosh noticed that the spheres kept darting from his hooves to the red colt. He didn’t speak for a long time, simply murmured and whimpered in inaudible dialogue as Big Macintosh’s large eyes stared at him. “Just—just to look?” He mumbled. “You won’t touch them? Promise?”
Big Macintosh let a soft smile spread on his face as he shook his head. It took several extended moments before the tan colt slid his hooves out from the safety of his chest and held them out in front of him, hiding his eyes from the red colt.
The red colt didn’t say anything, nor did he attempt to touch the red, bruised hooves that were within his reach. They looked like they hurt an awful lot, too much to walk on at the moment at the very least. That explained why he hadn’t bolted…
“Ain’t as easy as it looks? Buckin’ ah mean.” Big Mac joked, only for a slight whimper to escape the other’s throat.
A quiet growling soon erupted from the pit of the tan colt’s belly. He quickly blushed, eyes watering the more he moved his hooves. Big Macintosh was silent for several moments before his smile widened before he reached up a free hoof, sliding the cowpony hat from his head and placing it into the tan colt’s hooves.
The pony glanced up at him in question, blue eyes still wet in a layer of tears. Big Macintosh held his hoof out to tell the other not to move his hooves. He quickly stood up on his two hind legs, leaning on the trunk of the tree as he used his hooves to feel around for several moments. He glanced up, noticing a bright and juicy looking gala apple right above the two.
Big Mac brought his hooves back from the bark for a brief moment before slamming his hooves into the bark, watching from the corner of his eye as the red apple fell and landed into the cowpony hat with perfect precision. He let a huge smile spread across his face at his own achievement of accuracy.
The other stared at the hat in a state of shock, hooves trembling before he shakily began using the back of his hooves to pick up the apple. He began bringing it to his lips quickly before digging his teeth deep into the juicy nectar. He didn’t seem to think it reasonable to slow down, even when he could hear the chuckling of the other at his hunger.
Big Macintosh got back down on his rump, staring at the other eat for several minutes, not rushing him in the slightest as he smiled kindly. The other paused for a brief moment from eating, apple halfway to his mouth before biting his lower lip for a brief moment in consideration.
“C-C-Caramel…” The other quickly stuttered out, looking at Big Macintosh directly for perhaps the first time of the day. His eyes were still red, but he had indeed stopped crying.
“My name is Caramel… and… thanks.”
Just how long was it that those large blue eyes continued to stare back at him? The deep pools that he became so easily lost in only stared back at him in shock and amazement. They didn’t move, didn’t blink, and just continued to stare at him the same way his green eyes stared back.
It had to have been about ten seconds in reality, but in the strange world that Big Macintosh found a childhood friend after so many years, time seemed to slow down. Seconds became minutes, which turned into hours all too quickly. Neither was able to make a single sound. Neither was willing to look away. It was as if the past was swallowing them up, forcing them to remember each other in such a vivid manor. They became lost in memories of yesterday as the seconds of today passed a decade a moment.
It seemed as if a bomb went off the moment Caramel’s eyes finally blinked, and his head turned away. Whatever distracted him snapped Big Macintosh out of his own strange trance as well.
“Ah… ah uh…” Big Macintosh began to force his mouth to move. He quickly realized he was blushing, for how long that had been going on he had no idea. He began to violently shake his head back and forth to clear his thoughts. Why was it suddenly so hard to do anything? Why was it so hard just to speak to a friend? “C-Caramel… ah….”
“I need to…” Caramel suddenly interrupted. The red stallion glanced up to the pony who was quickly hitting his two front hooves on the ground impatiently, snow kicking up in every which direction. “I gotta… I need to go… find the bag… no, that’d be too long. Go buy more? B-But I’m broke…”
“Caramel?” Big Macintosh called out the name of his friend, only to be ignored by the panicked stallion that was tripping and tumbling over every word he spoke. He watched Caramel quickly stagger in circles once more as he spoke to himself. This time he was much quieter, his thoughts seemed more organized and less jumpy.
“Right… just… go to the store and we can figure out what’s going to happen there…” Caramel quickly scrambled his hooves on the snow in order to face back on the road to Ponyville. Big Macintosh was silent for several moments before his mind processed just what the other was about to do. On instinct along he jumped forward, snagging the other’s tail with his hoof. A rather deep squeak hit his ears as the brown tail attempted to be yanked free from his grasp.
“B-B-Big Mac, I gotta go and…” Caramel quickly stuttered out his words, a pleading look on his face as he turned his head behind him to look at the pony holding him hostage at the moment. His eyes were zooming around the area as his breath quickened. His body was shivering from the cold air surrounding him, his body was shaking just to keep in the heat.
“Ya’ll are hurt. And ya look freezin’ as well” Big Macintosh stated in a simple and plain voice. He lifted his free hoof to point at the other’s forehead. “Took a nasty fall back there, and what if ya hurt yerself more than ah could tell, shouldn’t ya go and see a doctor or somethin’? Or at least go home… wherever that is now.”
“You don’t get it!” Caramel whined out, shaking his backside in an attempt to wiggle his tail free from the red stallion’s grasp. “I’m fine, I just need to go and…” He was silent for several moments before closing his eyes, digging his hooves in the ground, and pushing with all his might. Big Macintosh felt the soft tail slip from his grasp as a gasp of air escaped his mouth.
“Sorry!” Caramel cried, charging forward back into Ponyville. Big Macintosh felt his hoof move through the air for Caramel’s tail once again, as if his body hadn’t registered what his eyes were seeing. For such a skinny pony Caramel sure could run fast, that was for sure.
Big Macintosh felt his hooves move on instinct alone as he quickly galloped after his friend. He thought quickly about his family, and how worried they must be for him being gone so long. He could imagine Applejack pacing back and forth, just waiting to bicker at him. Applebloom and Granny smith would both be worrying since it was long past midnight at this point.
By some miracle, the red stallion managed to dismiss all of these thoughts as he forced his hooves to concentrate on trotting forward after the tan pony. He closed his eyes and lowered his head, charging forward blindly after his friend.
“It was stupid, I know.” Caramel quietly mumbled to himself. “I should have thought it through. It’s obvious they wouldn’t be open this time of night.” He let a sigh escape his throat as his hoof began to trace circles in the snow blanketing the side of the building. “I don’t even have any money, idiot.”
“Wish ya would have remembered that before ya took off.” Big Macintosh panted out, his warm breath causing miniature clouds to appear from thin air. He sat with his back pressed against the brick wall of the small market. His eyes were glanced up to the sky, however his orange main continued to stay curtained over his eyesight the longer he panted for air. He glanced past Caramel and down the hallway of an alley into the center of Ponyville. Just how far had they run together? “Ya… ya run a lot faster than ah remember.”
“You didn’t have to follow me…” Caramel mumbled, digging his hoof into the snowy ground. He let his rump shift on the ground for a few moments. “I was just getting some cider, no biggie… right?” His own conversation drifted from talking to himself rather than the red stallion next to him, and at some times he seemed as if he were talking to both.
Big Macintosh glanced at the other, wondering briefly if the stuff he smelled was really weak enough to be considered cider of any kind. He thought about asking this as his eyes scanned the face of the other, looking for tints of red or even a difference in a pony’s normal behavior. He didn’t seem to be drunk, which meant his behavior the entire night had been entirely natural.
These past few hours themselves had felt sort of surreal, even though the red stallion was more than positive he was awake and attentive. Running around all day only to have this chaos happen was just a little too strange for him to happen out of the blue. Wasn’t his entire life supposed to be him just working day to day not getting involved in anything too major?
Caramel’s body shivered a few times from the cold. Every few moments his eyes would begin to dart around, and his mind almost seemed to become lost before regaining the proper position in where he was and what he was doing.
“Was he… always this jumpy?” The stallion thought to himself.
“About a month or so…” Caramel finally spoke up, glancing at the other as the silence quickly shattered. Or to be more correct, the red chest of the other, as if he were afraid to look his former friend in the eye. “I… I um… I moved back into the old house about a month or so ago. Y’know, the same one back in the woods not too far from Sweet Apple Acers?” Caramel’s blue eyes began to drift down to the snow where his hoof was. As he began to twist and turn his hoof like a drill, he continued to speak. “I meant to go and visit you… or at least say “hi”… but no time ever really seemed like the right time… are you mad at me?” Those last five words seemed hesitant, full of anxiety.
Big Macintosh cocked up his brow. “Nope.” He answered blankly, shaking his head left to right quickly, his voice remaining flat. Just what kind of a question was that anyway?
“Really?” Caramel’s voice suddenly brightened up in an instant as he shot his head up. His eyes were wide with a mixture of shock and relief. “Not at all? Not even a little? I didn’t screw up?” His voice seemed happy with a hint of desperation for a hint of confirmation. The red stallion simply nodded, watching a strange relief wash over his friend’s face. “I-I’m… glad…” He murmured. “I’m… I’m so glad.”
“Gosh, it’s been so many years.” Big Macintosh said, brushing off the strange reactions from the tan pony as he lifted a hoof to rub the back of his head. He began to blush over his already red coat with embarrassment. Was it… normal to be this happy over a friend you hadn’t seen in years? “Ya likely have more important things than a childhood friend.”
Caramel didn’t respond with the same enthusiasm as before. His short-lived excitement seemed to falter for a moment and then slowly die out. He gave a weak smile as he looked into the eyes of the other for what must have been the second time in the entire night. “I… I guess.” He said, chuckling. “I mean… we moved so many times, it’s hard to find anything to find that’s that important.” The tan pony’s voice began to trail off near the end of his sentence. His eyes flickered to something as if he became distracted, and he continued to remain silent for several moments. “So um… how’s the family?”
Big Macintosh put a hoof to his chin for a brief moment. “Well… ah suppose AJ and Granny are fine. Apple Bloom really grew up in the past few years… the only real drastic thing is my cousin is a bit of a celebrity…”
“Which one?” Caramel asked, his voice straining to continue the conversation simply to forget the fact he was too late to buy any of the cider.
“Braeburn… ah don’t remember the details, but ah hear he’s travelin’ with a Wonderbolt.” Big Macintosh stopped, realizing he was actually nervous. It was strange, he never had to carry a conversation like this before. Wasn’t he the one who stayed in the background most of the time to let others deal with the situation? Was it always this hard to talk to friends?
Big Macintosh looked at the tan pony in the darkness who was sitting no more than five feet from his own body. He seemed… bigger than his memory served. Whenever the tan pony did indeed cross his mind, which was very rare, he still imagined a colt. He supposed he himself had grown greatly in the years as well, but he still found it very hard to imagine that weak colt grow into… this.
“Ya look… bigger…” Big Macintosh spoke his mind.
Caramel glanced at the red stallion with wide eyes. If his eyes weren’t playing tricks on him in the darkness of the night, he could swear the other was indeed blushing. “I-I guess s-so” The tan pony stuttered to get out, looking down at his hoof. He was silent for several moments, deep in thought as he examined himself. “I’m still a lot weaker than normal earth pony’s though…” He admitted with a sigh. “I could probably go head to head with a pegasus… but a lot of the doctors still say I’m weaker than most normal stallions my age. Smaller too… though I suppose most everypony looks smaller to you, huh Big Mac?”
Big Macintosh shrugged. The chilly air continued to run down his spine as he spoke up once more, attempting to forget the freezing weather and forget his warm toasty bed at home. “So… why did ya move back ta the house?”
Caramel blinked several times, and looked like he really had to think this time. He was quiet for a while before stating simply. “It was easier,” He paused for a brief moment to take in a breath “My Pa… he lost his job, and the house we had been living in too… so we just moved back into the abandoned house. It’s old and dirty, but we can still live in it… I suppose…”
“Must be rough.” Big Macintosh said.
“Oh… no… I’m really… g-grateful to him for taking care of me and putting up with me.” Caramel quickly spat out “I… I mean, I usually…” The tan pony trailed off once again, slowly his words died out in the manor of a fire down to the final burning bits. He quickly bit his lip and shook his head.
“Big Mac?” Caramel suddenly asked loud and clear, causing Big Macintosh to jump from the sheer shock.
Caramel’s lower jaw twitched a few times as he attempted to speak the words that seemed too difficult to get off his chest. He quickly trembled a moment in the cold before closing his eyes, taking a small breath. “Am—am I allowed visiting you some more, I mean—to catch up or something like that?” He asked sheepishly, looking down at the ground like it held the meaning of life.
“Ah… ah suppose. Ah mean, ah don’t see why not. It’s winter, so most of the work is down-time until spring… ya can stop by if ya want. Ah’m usually at home.”
Caramel let a small smile split across his face. “Really?” He asked. His tail twitched once, the way it did and the timing of when it happened, Big Macintosh expected it to start wagging to only further add resemblance to Caramel and Winona. “So—you won’t get mad?”
“C-Course not,” Big Macintosh said, his voice shocked by the fact that Caramel was even asking permission. “Ah—ah want ta catch up some place… warmer… maybe spend some time together.” He said these words on instinct. It was as if the moment they left his mouth did it truly and utterly hit him deep in the pit of his belly the truth about this entire night.
Big Macintosh really… really missed Caramel.
He missed their running and playing in the orchard, their naps in the barn in stacks of hay, the long afternoons that seemed to last an eternity and five minutes at the same moment. The days they got lost in their own fun filled his mind with bittersweet feelings that he had to force down simply to keep a straight face.
“Ah… ah’d really appreciate that, Caramel.” Big Macintosh said, forcing a bitter smile onto his face as he let his mind entangle him in nostalgic memories of days long gone.
“Y-Yeah…” Caramel said, giggling softly. Air blew out from his mouth and his ears stood erect as his face finally smiled a genuine smile. “Someplace warmer would be real nice, Mac… sometime soon, I hope."
“I wonder if what I did was right?”
Caramel felt his hooves move in front of one another on their own as his mind raced with questions about Big Macintosh. The pathway was dark, unwelcoming even. Despite it being early Winter with every leaf missing for months to come, the trees seemed to act like a tunnel of darkness leading to the center of the land where his house lay.
Both his body and mind felt light, sick, happy, depressed, and most of all, exhausted. Feelings from every direction seemed to be attacking him as he questioned himself further and further if what he said was right, if what he acted like was correct. If he acted normal…
But… he did agree to meet him. That itself seemed to at least be a positive sign despite every single doubt that was embedding deep into his thoughts.
“T-That’s right!” Caramel stuttered out, freezing in place a moment to stomp a hoof on the ground in victory. “I—I know he isn’t angry with me—and that’s a good thing, isn’t it?” The tan pony forced a smirk on his face as he looked ahead into the dark forest ahead. He chuckled to himself as his voice grew louder. “A-And, he even promised we can catch up, that’s great, right?” Although he asked the question to himself, he continued staring ahead at the pathway in front of him.
“This is a good thing,” The tan steed snapped to himself “I mean—I feel really happy because of it, don’t I?” Caramel took a shaky step forward as he continued to ramble on to the darkness around him, home seeming very far away.
“I mean—I’m happy! Really happy, I’m so ha…” His eyes suddenly stung. The tan pony quickly blinked several times as he lifted a hoof to his eyes, feeling the trail of a single freezing tear. He winced as his hoof came into contact with it, almost as if it had shocked him.
“W-What the,” The pony murmured. He was silent for several moments as he brought his hoof back to examine the thing that fell from his cheek. “W-Why am I—I’m happy—Aren’t I?” Upon further inspection he realized his hoof was indeed trembling.
The pony didn’t speak to himself any longer. He remained silent as he brought his hoof to the ground, digging it deep into the snow to cease the trembling. He quickly bit his lower lip as his mouth began to tremble in the same manor.
“No!” Caramel broke the silence, his entire body seemed to halt in fear. He began to dig his teeth into his lower lip, fighting back the urge to sniffle as he took a single step. He took another after a good ten seconds, this process repeated until his body was finally able to walk normally once more on the pathway to his home.
“I’m such an idiot.” The tan stallion hissed. “Why am—why am I…”
Soarin groaned out in simple agony as the thought occurred to him that he did indeed have to pry himself out of the uncomfortable bed eventually. He forced himself to keep his eyes closed just a while longer to delay the unavoidable. He whimpered and whined quietly as he tightened his grip on the pillow under his head. As he began to squirm in frustration at how much he wanted to sleep, he
The wonderbolt began to think it was rather odd that while the bed was lumpy and two small for a couple fully grown stallions the previous night, it suddenly began to feel something fit only for Princess Celestia. The mattress was softer than the comfiest cloud he had ever crashed into, the sheets smelled like apples, and the air simple room felt like it was the perfect temperature to snooze at.
“Y’know, if ya feel like nappin’ till nighttime, at least stop behavin’ like a baby.” Braeburn called from the other side of the hotel room, which in reality was not all that far away, only a two dozen feet or so from the bed at most. Soarin could hear Braeburn chuckle to himself quietly and then go on to mumble about how much of a child the pegasus was acting like.
The sky blue pegasus cracked open an eye and ceased his minor fit at the sound of his coltfriend’s voice. He had a blank expression as his vision cleared to reveal Braeburn seemingly near the small kitchen area of the hotel. He appeared to be working on something, cooking perhaps, the burners for the stove appeared to be on.
“Maybe I like being a baby.” Soarin grumbled out, feeling his bones ache and crack as he stretched his spine. He began to lightly kick his bottom legs against the bed to showcase his child-like behavior, still leaving the rest of his body at rest. He was silent for several moments as he stared at Braeburn’s backside, giving off a half grin as he enjoyed the view. “Whatcha making there?”
Braeburn looked as if he were turning something as he began to speak up. “Well, the train was sellin’ some apples, and ah thought ah could snag a few and fry em up fer us. Gala’s yer favorite, right?”
Soarin half sprang up from the bed at the mention of apples. He half glided with his outstretched wings to the back of Braeburn, glancing over the earth pony’s shoulders at the cinnamon covered apples lying in the frying pan. The pegasus licked his lips as he leaned against the other, who quickly supported his weight easily as he turned the apples some with the wooden spoon. “Soar, ya ain’t eatin’ till they cool down, ya know that, right?”
“I know, I know.” Soarin sighed as he wrapped his upper legs around the other who he was half riding. “But did I mention how much I love you? It’s a lot.”
“Good for you, but ya still aren’t getting’ a nibble till it’s ready and cooled.” Braeburn said, suppressing a blush as Soarin nuzzled the back of his neck with his nose. “Why don’t ya go back ta sleep and ah’ll wake ya when it’s ready?”
“You tempt me with apples and then won’t even let me cuddle you. You are one sick bastard.” Soarin whined. As he said these words his eyes quickly scanned Braeburn’s who turned to him. He chuckled out a few apologies and reminded him that he still had to wait.
He seemed just a little more there then yesterday. If not a little too normal than the Braeburn who begged to talk until he passed out from exhaustion. Soarin wasn’t positive if he should feel relived just yet, or continue to worry. He leaned his face on Braeburn’s shoulder, borrowing the side of his face in the other’s soft neck and his hoof began to stroke the yellow stallion’s golden mane.
“You alright buddy?” He asked quietly, just loud enough for the yellow pony to make out over the gentle sizzling of apples.
Braeburn’s body seemed to freeze for a single moment in time. It was a moment that likely took him off guard. It must have sent several questions through his mind at once. Soarin knew he didn’t phrase it normally, didn’t speak it casually. He closed his eyes a moment and squeezed Braeburn the tiniest bit tighter in that moment, hoping it would pass it’s eternity.
The yellow earth pony’s body tightened in that moment before releasing. He would have likely looked at Soarin if the pegasus wasn’t already half visible to him. He chuckled softly, although it seemed a tad forced. “Ya… ya only call me buddy like that when yer worried for me.”
“I’m always worried for you.” Soarin mumbled, closing his eyes a moment to take in the scent of the earth pony. He continued to rub his lover’s mane in silence as he awaited his answer.
“Ah—ah uh,” Braeburn quickly shook his head to clear his mind. “Ah’m fine, as fine as apples on a freshly grown tree!” He stated proudly. “Yer actin’ mighty weird Soar, sure ya don’t want a little more rest before goin’ to see the others? Spitfire stopped by to tell ya that yer in leavin’ in ‘bout three hours or so.”
“Yeah… I’m fine.” Soarin mumbled, detaching himself from the earth pony as he put a hoof to his temple. He plastered a fake smile on his face as he glanced at the apples once more. “Ah… ah think I’ll go back to bed for a little while. Wake me up when that grub is ready!”
“A-Alright.” Braeburn murmured out, turning his attention back to the food.
Soarin turned back to the bed, letting a single tremble overtake his body as he glanced out the balcony. The rising sun was supposed to bring a new day, wasn’t it? Why did it feel like he had just spent hours awake in these few moments? Why did his shoulders feel so heavy all of a sudden?
“I feel like this day should end already.” Soarin grumbled to himself.
Braeburn found himself blowing air out of his lips and watching it turn into a miniature cloud in front of him every few moments to distract him from the roaring sound of the crowd mixed in with the whistling of the trains in the distance. This mixed with his eyes locked on the train ticket in front of his eyes seemed just enough to keep him from going simply mad with the amount of noise around him. The worst part was it likely wasn’t as loud as his ears were convincing him it was.
The earth pony suppressed a whimper as cold wind began to beat at him, whipping his scarf around as well as his mane. He felt a hoof be pressed against his hat as Soarin gave out the whimper of disapproval he had forced himself to keep in. The pegasus wrapped his wings tightly around himself as well as slung his arm around the earth pony with a sigh. “Damn, it’s cold as buck…” He grumbled out. “When did you say that train got here?”
Braeburn shrugged. “Ten or so minutes, ah suppose.” He sighed, begrudgingly leaning against the other for warmth as he sat against the building wall, ignoring the one or two stray glances he knew he would receive. He let a giggle escape his throat as a wing soon slung around him as well, softly rubbing against his body in various places.
“I can’t decide if I’m looking forward to freezing to death, or passing out from exhaustion in about three hours.” Soarin said with a small smile on his face as he shook his head, glancing down at the earth pony at his side. “Which do you think sounds more appealing?”
“Passin’ out.” Braeburn grumbled. “Anything but staying so cold…” The yellow pony buried his face in the other’s side as he gripped the slip of paper tightly in his hoof. “If ah—ah could, ah think ah would much appreciate a fire to curl up by. That an option?”
“Pfft, I wish. But you’re the one wrapped up in a feathery blanket, stop complaining.” Soarin snorted. He began to grumble playfully as he felt Braeburn’s rough and worn vest rub against his feathers a small chuckle was audible to him in the mixture of the crowd. The pegasus slowly glanced up to the gray and white sky above, watching snowflakes come down one after another and land both on and near him. He began to miss spring, and even the chilly airs of autumn, compared to this.
“Try to send any letters today?” Soarin asked. The thought simply popped into his mind from seemingly nowhere. It hit him so hard that the words themselves spilled from his mouth before he could even think about it for more than a moment.
Braeburn suddenly shifted it a way that pulled on Soarin’s feathers, causing the pegasus to hiss in pain quietly. “No…” The earth pony mumbled quietly, as if he were ashamed in himself. “Ah—ah mean… not really… ah—ah mean ah just…”
Soarin suddenly felt a first of guilt jolt him in the belly as he began to wish he didn’t enter this conversation. Still, he continued. “What does, “not really” mean?” He asked, cocking up a brow in question as he glanced down at the other. Braeburn’s face was now hidden from the pegasus, concealed under his cowpony hat.
“I’m sorry…” Braeburn mumbled, the weight of his body lightening against the pegasi’s. He seemed like he was trembling. He was shaking just enough for Soarin’s sensitive feathers to sense, yet not enough for it to be instantly visible to the naked eye of a passerby. “Ah—Ah got up earlier than ya… and ah just… ah wasn’t even thinkin’ and ah’m… sorry.”
Soarin sighed, feeling Braeburn wince in guilt under his wing. He opened his mouth several times in an attempt to speak, yet somehow failed almost every time. It was as if the words were lost within him, almost within reach as they fell away the further he reached out. On his final attempt, he somehow managed to find his hidden voice somewhere in his lungs as he snagged the jumbled sentences.
“It’s okay.” He promised, rubbing his upper leg up and down the back of Braeburn’s body. He was greeted with a silence that lasted a lifetime as Braeburn seemed to attempt to simply get his thoughts together. He seemed to expect Soarin to yell at him, or judge him, or even push him away. All of these things crossed the mind of the pegasus, yet in the end it only made sense to not hurt his coltfriend.
“I know you’re still trying to sort everything out, and you miss your family and everything… and I’ve only gotten upset before because I care about you, and I’ve seen just how your folks treat you.” Soarin mumbled, pressing his hoof against Braeburn’s chest. He began to rub in soothing, gentle circles to calm him down. “I just think it’s unhealthy for you considering… everything you have going on besides that.”
“But… but ah…” Braeburn tried to get out before he was interrupted by the speedy pegasus who pressed his forehead against the golden mane of the other.
“They don’t care about you.” The wonderbolt stated, trying his best to keep his voice from making anything other than a light and caring tone, no matter how much it hurt him. “They freaked out the moment you mentioned coming and traveling with me, and cut you off the first chance they got.” He wanted to tell the truth despite the sniffling Braeburn was holding back. “I want to understand why you keep trying to get in contact with them, or hold some kind of bond… but it’s getting hard to understand… but I’ll try not to freak out this time, okay?
“Ah don’t know why ah do it either.” Braeburn admitted, his voice shaky as he sniffed a few times. He grew silent as he bit his lower lip, quietly grumbling for how upset he was becoming. “Ah want to stop sendin’ them, but ah just…”
The sky blue pegasus wasn't able to hear the rest as he began to hear the screeching halt of a train a dozen feet away. He let a sigh escape his throat as he pat Braeburn on the head, adjusting his hat with a single hoof. “That your train?”
Braeburn nodded slowly. He seemed to quietly mumble something that obviously wasn’t meant for the pegasi’s ears. Perhaps it was a few curses over having to leave, or maybe relief for some warmth.
The pegasus quickly let both his upper legs wrap around the yellow earth pony before nuzzling the top of his head. He tightened his grip the more he thought about the leaving the earth pony after upsetting him, he felt a mixture of guilt, and even worse, relief. He quickly kissed Braeburn’s forehead before slowly releasing him.
“S-See you in a few days.” He said, lifting his hooves to tighten Braeburn’s scarf as his wings slowly folded back onto his back. He began to slowly stroke his hoof down Braeburn’s chest before breathing in the scent of apples once more, likely for the final time in a few days.
Braeburn slowly shook his head, trying to clear his thoughts of the few previous moments that upset him. He looked almost as if he wanted to forget everything and turn onto auto-pilot. “Y-yeah… see ya.” He said.
Soarin slowly got to his hooves, helping Braeburn up with his leg as he began to chuckle. “This the part where we kiss passionately and pretend this is the end of the world as we know it?” He joked.
The earth pony forced a smirk. “A-Ah guess… but can we just say we love each other and move on?” His eyes seemed to be back to normal. At least as normal as the yellow stallion would allow himself to become at the moment while staying calm and collective.
Soarin let out a brief chuckle before shaking his head as the crowd began to pile into the opening doors of the train. He looked into Braeburn’s eyes once more, looking for a sign off difference from a moment ago once more.
“Love you, buddy.”
