Never Fade Away
“Do you really think I’m the type of kirin who walks into a building I don’t know how to get out of?”
“Good morning.”
My eyes shot open. Pain pulsed throughout my head. I groaned and rubbed my temple with a hoof as my heads up display came to life. A young black unicorn smiled from her tiny window at the top left of my sight.
“How’d you sleep?” She squeaked. “Good dreams or…”
“Bad. This one actually hurt. Hell… it kind of felt like a dive, but I was in control.” I pondered on the thought. “I think?”
The mare frowned, “Well, don’t go crazy on me yet. That’s just one of the side effects of the Dreamcatcher implant. I’m administering some CC’s throughout. It should help.”
A cool liquid shot into the back of my head from my spine. Sweet relief washed over me.
“Ahhhh… Thanks, Black Friday.”
“No problem.” She continued to grin.
The white faux leather seat’s motors whined as it pushed me up. I peered out the window at the misty world below. Society weaved below like data pulsing through optical fiber as the vehicle pierced through the dark sky. The rain thumped like bullets on the car’s ceiling. The neon lights of the city refracted off the windows.
“The hacker was last pinged in a class five apartment complex in the lower half of the inner city. You want me to lock down all access?” Black Friday raised a brow.
“I’ll be fine for now.”
The car dived down below the twisting neon speedways, breaking away to the underbelly of Detrot. The inner city hung above a massive jagged crater filled with uniform factories. The smog they produced covered the area in an ominous smell, even through the vehicle. Salt and urine mixed with oil. The smell of the poor. It almost hid the stalactite-like structures that hung freely under the buildings above. Decades of the same waste had scoured away the luster and color of the buildings. Balconies tucked into the structure peered out into the pit below. A few ponies smoking outside glared in my direction. My car automatically locked onto a nearby landing pad of one of the locations.
I wrapped myself with a beige trench coat from the passenger seat and tightened my black tie. “Ma’am, you’re sure that hacker is here? This place looks like it barely has enough power to keep the lights on.”
Black Friday turned away from the camera for a moment, looking at something before turning back. “Four percent margin of error in the system. I doubt it.”
I nodded as the car kicked and blew trash, rain and dust away from the landing pad. The whole car rocked as the extending tires made contact with the ground. The door popped up, the storm grew to the volume of war drums. The wind whipped at the tail of my coat. My mane immediately flattened against the waterfall above. It was a beautiful… night… day? I forgot which.
“Keep me posted.”
“Noted.” I shielded my eyes from the rain and followed the white guide lights to a single door at the end of the stark platform. The door slid open automatically and I stepped inside. The dim lights on the ceiling flickered on as the sealed elevator began to climb.
I closed my eyes to just chill. Jobs like this always get me antsy.
“Did you ever ask out that young mare from the gas station down the block?” Black Friday winked.
I sighed, opening my eyes. “Ma’am, could you please not?”
“You need to get laid.”
“I’ll talk with you later,” I growled out before ending the line. Her image disappeared from my sight, gifting me with sweet silence.
The elevator rattled and gave a deep boom as the number above the door ticked up. Neon hologram ads on the walls did little to hide the stains and mold growing just behind them. But that smell… almost made me want to puke. The wires hissed to a halt on floor negative six and the door opened with practiced bravado.
I stepped into the tight lobby filled with more stains and ads. Zebras, Griffons, unreformed changelings and, of course but to a lesser extent, ponies hung around the already oppressive area. Some smoked or drank, but they were all augmented. Replaced eyes, new limbs, entirely new wings and even faces. Their cybernetics were worse than basic, they were closer to rusty fragmented bones. Old metal and wires that ate away at each of them, tiny holes surrounding the front line against bare flesh. Quickly that lively lobby snapped to silence. All eyes were on me, like daggers through cigarette smoke.
Talk about a warm welcome. The clash of graffitied walls and the smell of literal shit was such an upgrade from the shiny streets above. Like a whole new world.
I approached the small window to my right, where a pegasus with a weathered silver jaw sat in the tiny room behind it.
“Can I help you?” She growled through her wired shut jaw.
“I’m looking for a tenant.”
She tried her best to frown. “Name?”
“Rosebud.”
The mare turned to a little computer on the desk and began sifting through the database. I winced forward as liquid and blood trickled down my neck. Glass shards exploding past my head.
“Fuck off corpo mutt!”
Everyone in the room began screaming obscenities. They weren’t worth the attention. I was just trying to do my job and I took pride in it. Another bottle crashed through that thought to the back of my head. That was enough.
My trench coat’s tails lagged behind me as I whipped around searching for the last fucker to throw a bottle at me. It was a griffon confined to a wheelchair, his hind legs gone completely, cut off at different lengths. I ran through him, slamming the griffin out of his wheelchair and into the wall with my foreleg. He choked on his words while trying to squirm away. Everyone else froze.
I raised my other hoof, sections of it slid away revealing a long blade hidden in its chrome inside. My body began to blacken as the tip of the blade slowly extended towards his eye. Inches to millimeters away from his pupil.
“I-I got that information you wanted, sir,” the pegasus squeaked out.
I dropped the griffon onto the floor and retracted my blade. His gasps for air mixed into his aggressive coughing till his face bled red. The black across my coat retreated.
“This floor… apartment thirteen.”
“Thank you.” I gave her a curt nod.
“I thought the kirin were all gone…” I heard someone whisper as I sauntered into the hallway.
It was a maze of twists and turns of the same banal spaces. Pipes crossing over each other, more advertisements, dull yellow holographic number signs, wood doors fitted with tiny monitors on their frames and the stench was revolting. It was like someone died twice here.
Thirteen, the last number in the hall. I buzzed the doorbell… to no response. It didn’t matter if they tried to run, there was no way off this hanging death trap of a building without a car. No pegasus or griffon could fly far enough away without breathing that smog before passing out into free fall.
I sighed and noticed something odd. The door was already open. In fact, the strike plate was completely torn out. The door eeked open with a light push. I peeked inside at wooden splinters scattered on the floor ahead. No lights were on inside.
“Wonderful,” I mumbled under my breath.
The path was drowned behind wires. I had to duck under sections just to get through the entrance. I couldn’t believe the living room was even worse. Beer cans fucking everywhere next to old punk rock vinyls. I didn’t even know they made those anymore. Credit chips and data shards were scattered over a neatly made sofa-bed. The tiny kitchen connected to the room was nothing short of an overflowing nightmare. Flies collected over the murder of food abandoned on the stove. Still, everything was tucked in wires.
I switched my vision with a quick thought. The apartment glitched with an orange overlay. Where did all those wires go? I scanned each path; everything converged into the wall above a bookshelf. My vision returned to normal as I kicked the shelf to the floor. It bounced against the carpet with a loud thud. I snickered at the hole it had been covering.
How archaic.
Servers, motherboards, screens and files filled the space. A pale blue unicorn was crumpled in front of the main monitor. A crater of a hole had been punched through her chest, ripping the gray sleeveless denim jacket wrapped around the body in two.
Immediately, I called Black Friday. The line went through. “Someone already zero’d the target.”
“Wait… what?!”
“I know.” I rolled her head to the side with a magical tug of her multi-colored ultraviolet hair. The standard jack-in port was intact but was surrounded by an unmarked augmentation. A silver and black piece that was embedded into the lower back of the mare’s neck.
“What did you find?”
No logos or brand markings were anywhere on it. “Ma’am, it’s ghostware. I can’t read any data on her. No identification or cyberware.”
“Shit,” she muttered under her breath.
I let out a sigh. “Lift all restrictions, I gotta dive.”
“Why? You know the risks and the policies against diving into a dead pony’s mind.” I was taken aback. That was the most concern I’ve ever heard from Black Friday.
“We have to be sure she’s the hacker.”
She sharply exhaled out her nose. “Fine, but take it easy this time.”
“No promise.”
I pulled out a long cord from the top of my spine and levitated it into the port on her neck. I took a deep breath and plugged it.
The world began to scream. The walls morphed into monochrome cubes that assaulted my eyes. Flashing me into darkness and light. My heartbeat aggressively slammed against eardrums. I dropped onto my chest; my body convulsing.
Then it stopped.
The room was gone. Everything had been replaced with an all encompassing void and a ringing, quiet hiss. I got onto my hooves and looked around. My heart stopped as I finally saw my hooves.
“What the fuck?”
That wasn’t my right hoof. It was glossy black steel, not tan like the other. I stared through its reflection at what was… my face. A war between cyberware and flesh. Wha- Who was I?
The hiss grew louder, slithering into my skull. I tried to cover my ears to stop it, but that was useless. It droned continuously, mocking me. Overpowering every thought. Was this hell? I took a breath and exhaled hard out my nostrils.
No, I was in control.
I am in control.
The hiss stopped and I looked up from my hooves. An ornate double door's long shadow enveloped me. A dim blue light seeped out of the chipped wood’s cracks that ran along it’s finish. The symbols etched in it had been lost to time. A seemingly endless shattered glass window frame stood above it. Was this always here?
I braced against the weight of the doors and pushed. My cybernetic limbs revved and whined as I screamed for it to submit, but no matter how hard I tried, the door remained married to it’s lock.
I slammed my hoof into the frame, denting it. Dust flew off as the doors rattled. One of the shards above tumbled in through the air, thudding at my hooves. I tilted my neck and stared at the piece. Inside was a circular server room wires and bloodied bodies everywhere. Rosebud was interfacing with the main console.
I blinked and I was in the server room. Unreadable code blazed up the screen in front of me.
A voice came out of me that wasn’t mine. “Afterburner, get out of there! The system’s coming down.”
I glanced to the left at— holy shit.
A burnt leather jacket wrapped around a bruised and battered kirin with a wire plugged into the side of his head sat in a metal capsule. Computer racks around the throne sparked with arcing electricity and visible data bits. The orange glow around his pupils faded and he ripped the cord from his port. He pushed himself out of the chair and stared directly at me. The power flickered off as the red emergency lights came on.
“We did it!” Warmth flooded over me and I ran towards the kirin. Hooves out for an embrace.
Their pupils sharpened to viper-like needles.
“Sorry.”
They raise their black hoofcannon and fire. The world froze for only a moment as I flew back through the air. The hint of a grin appeared on the kirin’s face.
≫⊂＝＝＝＝＝ ⋈ ＝＝＝＝＝⊃≪
I hyperventilated as I ran my hooves all over my chest. I was me again, with no holes to be found. I was back in the apartment tangled in it’s wires. Still smelled like shit too. Black Friday was still on the line; her eyes wide. “Fuck!”
I could only stare at the corpse’s eyes, their mechanical apertures wide. Who was she? “Ma’am… what’s wrong?”
“Whatever was in that pony’s augmentation has backdoored you and the building using some sort of hidden C2 code. I-I couldn’t stop it, so I locked down the exits both virtual and physical.”
“So what?” My heart was racing.
“You have to shred that virus, but it’s already fucked your head so expect the perception of reality to warp. Just keep it together, okay?”
“Don’t worry. I know what’s re—“
The walls began to breathe. The call and my heads up display vanished. A porcelain pony digitized into existence, plopping onto a nearby chair.
“Afterburner,” They gave a small smile, but something was off… was that a hint of remorse in their tone? “Are you okay?”
I ripped open my jacket and levitated my pistol out of it’s hidden holster. Without hesitation, I pulled the trigger, busting two shots at the pony. They vanished as the bullets shredded the cushions. “What the fuck did you do?”
“Ask Black Friday. Mom always had a thing for tools.”
“Excuse me?”
“Hexadecimal said you’d be dumb but this…” The pony walked out from behind me and pressed their face close to mine. “This is far past what even she expected.”
I scrunched my muzzle and glanced away. “Can you just make my job easy and delete yourself so I can go home early?”
“Delete myse… I’m not a virus! I’m Live Wire.”
I facehoofed. “Listen here you glorified toaster-”
“You know none of this is real right?” Live Wire cut me off coldly.
What...
What the fuck?
They walked over to Rosebud’s body, the cybernetic on her neck softly glowed giving off a droning buzz. The pony frowned, before crouching down to her face and jacking into the corpse’s head. Live Wire’s eyes quickly flickered aqua. “How would you fix this, Hexadecimal?”
I closed my eyes and breathed in to chill my nerves, but the pins still raced up my spine. “I know what’s real.”
I could care less if that thing heard me.
Live Wire let out a long sigh, the sound distorted into different octaves, before returning a glare at me. “Do you remember anything before right now?”
“Of course.”
“What did you have for breakfast?”
“I-“
“When is your birthday? Where do you live? What’s your mother’s name? Your father’s?” Live Wire edged closer, pressing me backwards with each question. His voice shifted from masculine to feminine repeatedly.
“I-“ My heart sank as my head spun. “I don’t know… but I’m really tired. It’s just hard to think right now.”
“Let me show you what’s real.” Live Wire’s voice crackled back to normal as he trotted right up to my face, practically muzzle to muzzle, and gently placed his hooves on my temples. Glowing aqua rings appeared around his pupils. The lights ran from his eyes down to his cheeks and collar, then across his hooves. My vision grew fuzzy and I blinked trying to get rid of it.
The static twilight skyline of Detrot flickered to life like an old television screen. Wind chimes quietly danced in the cold breeze. A kirin with flame red hair and a leather jacket lit up a cigarette next to me leaning on a railing. I was standing on a fire escape with myself watching the sunset.
“You weren’t in your garage so I thought you’d be out here.” A voice sounded out from behind. It was Hexadecimal, with a bottle firmly grasped in her magic while she slid through the open window.
“Come to crack another joke?”
She shook the tan liquid in the bottle labeled: Bourbon’s Finest. “I’ve come to celebrate.”
“Finally got that job at the gas station?”
“You damn right I did!” Hexadecimal paused to take a long swig before nudging the bottle at the kirin. “Wanna sip?”
“I don’t touch that shit, Hexie.”
She laughed, snorting periodically. “Wait… so the infamous Afterburner won’t drink, but you’ll smoke?”
“Have you ever tried to buy a liver in this economy?”
"Have you ever tried buying a new lung in this economy?"
“Touché.” He snickered, taking one last drag from his cigarette. The room dissolved back into the small apartment as he blew away the smoke.
Tears. That was all I had.
Who… was I? The harmony to someone else’s melody? No. That couldn’t be right. I worked for SomaTech everyday. My mother’s name is…
My father’s…
…
I don’t know.
…
Why?
…
I needed more. I have to know more.
The lights in the room went out. A deep boom sounded out of the brief darkness, then ivy colored emergency floor lights turned on to dimly illuminate the area.
“What now?” I groaned.
“Crystal building fifty-three is under lockdown. All tenants please remain in your rooms. The issue will be resolved shortly.” A robotic voice echoed out over hidden speakers.
My HUD shimmered to life, but with no connection to the internet. I marched out of the apartment and into the hallway. I guess the lighting situation was a whole building problem. Two backlit ponies edged into the hallway.
“Hey! Get back to your tiny boxes.” I leveled my pistol at them.
They continued walking towards me, with a bit more speed in their steps.
“What part of I HAVE A GUN don’t you chromedomes understand?!”
I fired off a burst at the ponies which they ducked under. One closed the distance and leaped at me. I slammed my hidden blade into their chest as it emerged from the between sliding sections of my hoof. The edge wetly pushed through the pony as they puked blood over my face. I guided their body to the floor using their momentum.
I winced as the second one cracked a bat across my back. My hind legs buckled, I caught myself on a wall and dropped my pistol. The shadow spun the bat around, slamming it into my stomach. I dry heaved.
“Fuck!” They stumbled back as I pushed off the wall at them. A small groan escaped their teeth. I wiped my drool onto my collar and waved them towards me.
The assailant charged full force. What an idiot. I turned around and bucked back as hard as I could when I was sure they couldn’t stop. The body was shot into a door frame. A loud crunch trailed closely by erratic shallow breathing. They tried to move but their legs wouldn’t budge. The pony began to sob.
I leaned down to their face. “Fucking relax. Just buy a new spine.”
The pony’s face contorted into ugly rage. They gargled and spat at me. Instantly, my body engulfed in flames leaving me blackened.
“You little shit!” I began to slam my hoof against their skull…
…And I kept stomping. Long after they stopped trying to resist. Long after their face was nothing more than a mess of chunky mincemeat splattered onto a backdrop of gray. I kept stomping until I was left exhausted.
My normal colors returned as ragged breaths escaped from me. My body and mind felt equally as heavy. I wiped the blood from my face onto my coat’s collar. I glanced up at the wall just behind the pony.
A glitching mural of a nirik, everything above his muzzle was pulled to the sides, like panels, with wires leading to an orb. It glowed with a pulsing orange tint, but his face was anything but. The nirik was in agony. He was screaming… and I could softly hear it.
The pony’s corpse slithered past me. It’s bone cracking as the flesh twisted. The metal of their cybernetics gashed into the fur, slowly removing it. I turned to see the other body mash together with it. The meat bubbled and grew. What it created made me feel like a child.
It laughed. “I remember you, cunt.”
I reached for my gun but the amalgamation stomped on it, the flesh sucking it into the body. My eyes widened as my spine danced.
I ran. Ran as fast as my cybernetic hooves would carry me. I had to find that lobby, but shit. The place was fucking maze. Everything looked the same.
Sliding around another corner, I was met with the stairs. The creature’s gallop was so loud that distance was impossible to tell.
“Fucking course!” I spat out under a breath.
I raced up the steps without another moment to pause. A three floor buffer put between me and whatever the fuck that was. The floor I entered was different though. Actually, that would be a massive understatement. This building couldn’t fit… this inside it’s walls.
A massive multi-balcony theater. Each velvet seat was claimed by a server rack. On the ceiling was a beautifully painted mural of music and multiple colors of magic exploding away from a single center image; a large purple treble clef eclipsing a blue eighth note.
On stage were many different instruments, sound mixers and a central dual record table. I walked straight down the center aisle towards the stage and stopped to glance down at the pit. A gray earth pony was tuning a beautiful wooden cello. Fawning after each plucked string.
“Hey.”
She continued tuning.
“Hey!”
“She can’t hear you.”
I glanced up to the stage. A spiky blue hair unicorn stared down at me, her eyes hidden behind a pair of violet shades. She grimaced and sighed. “She isn’t real… but I wish she was.”
“Then what is she?”
“An AI modeled after an engram.”
My ears shot back at the word. “That’s illegal.”
“You’re one to talk,” the mare scoffed.
The mare in the pit stood and began to play the most beautifully haunting melody I’ve ever heard. The unicorn began towards the back curtains.
Something inside me just snapped. “Just tell me what the fuck is going on, Vinyl!”
She stopped and gave a warm grin. “I guess she couldn’t burn all that old data, huh?”
I took a step back and slowly brought out one of my hidden hoof blades. Vinyl’s image flickered as she laughed at me.
“What?!”
I jumped as the mare disappeared from the stage with little fanfare. Her voice echoed as the laughter continued both everywhere and nowhere. “That bitch really has you protected, but don’t worry. I’ll show you what’s going on.”
The room spun around me. I brought my second blade out in response. My head was tightly constricting around my brain. I just need to breathe. Live Wi- that virus was just fucking with me. I knew what was real. I knew what was-
Vinyl reappeared and shoved me back into one of the chairs. “Sorry, bud.”
She grasped my face with her magic and began to tear. Sporadic white spots began filling my vision. My stomach reeled as my skin was snapped off. Vinyl tossed part of my cheek aside, hitting the floor with a loud clunk. She reached inside my jaw and pulled out a data shard. Just when the throbbing pain seemed to have reached its peak, my eyes rolled back into darkness.
≫⊂＝＝＝＝＝ ⋈ ＝＝＝＝＝⊃≪
Everything was white. I thought I was blind until a pony pulled up. My joints burned.
Hexadecimal said something. A mute phrase I couldn’t make out even after she mouthed it again and again.
“What…?” I attempted to rub the exhaustion out from my eyes with my hooves. A humdrum of clanking mixed with static suppressed my hearing. The punk unicorn stomped her forehooves overwhelmed with rage.
“Afterburner, what fuck happened in there?!”
“What?” I felt like a broken record player.
“How did you interface the admin profile? Your biometrics weren’t even detectable… I thought you… no.”
Hexadecimal shook her head and galloped over to a wall of monitors. She ripped a cord from a hidden port inside her forehoof and jacked into the system. Her eyes flickered into a purple technomagical trance. Data and matrices reflected off her pupil at a thousand words per minute.
“You can’t be. Y-you have memories… emotions…”
“I can’t be what?” I got out of the chair and into my hooves.
“You're just fucking data in a moving shell!”
I tried to digest what she just said. But Hexadecimal gave me none, and continued to mumble and rage.
“Goddamn corpos fucking me sideways again!” She retracted her wire and turned to me. Her eyes were reddening and glossy. “Why would they make you? It’s pointless!”
“You think I’m pointless?” Something inside me began to buzz, filling my chest.
“I don’t know what to think, but you can’t be a machine. It just doesn’t make sense.”
≫⊂＝＝＝＝＝ ⋈ ＝＝＝＝＝⊃≪
I greedily grasped for air as if I had been submerged under a literal sea of bytes. The theater level dilapidation shocked me. Yesterday’s bullet holes and slashes’ marks in chairs and walls. The stage collapsed in on itself, a massive concrete chuck rested dominantly center stage. The paint all around chipped away. Wires, both worn and torn, sparked in the air. Vinyl Scratch sat in the seat next to me with a sour expression across her face.
“I’m real… right?”
“I can’t prove your existence.” She sighed. “Because I can’t tell you what it is. Besides, what makes mine more real than yours?”
“But I had birthdays, friends… I-I have memories.”
“Those aren’t real. You were trapped in your mind for years. All you had were dreams.”
My breathing began to stagger.
“You give someone good memories and they become an upstanding citizen of society. Give someone bad ones and they become the dreg of it. You can make the perfect drone with just the right choices.”
Vinyl levitated a data shard, looped in a necklace, over to me. I opened my hooves to accept it. My vision started to blur. What am I?
“Look, you have the freedom to choose what matters to you. No one can do that for you.” She placed a hoof on my cheek but it phrased right through, glitching against the inside of my face.
The gesture moved me. I was a rubber-face clown. I cried so hard my eyes dried up. My flames grew hotter as my coat bleed black. Pressed my face into my hooves. “What do I need to do?”
“What?” Vinyl leaned closer.
“How can I forget this and remember?”
“You need to…” Her eyes darted away. “Kill yourself.”
My heart sank. I don’t know why her words hurt. Worse, my voice escaped me.
“I know. I know.”
I took a long deep breath, but I could stop shaking. My normal colors returned to me. “Why?”
“When you're on the edge of entering the void, the system will let go and we’ll wake you up with a familiar phrase.”
I glanced at the data shard. Memories locked behind layers of ICE. Real moments. I put the necklace around my neck.
“But the system can’t be the one to do it.”
“I think I got the picture.” I unsheathed my hoof blade and pressed it against my throat, then paused. What if I was wrong? Could I afford to be? I stole one last look at Vinyl. She softly grinned as the wall behind her exploded.
A mass of flesh and metal entered past the dust and debris. I think it was smiling too. “I found you.”
“Either do it now or run!” Vinyl screamed.
I froze.
...
What if I was wrong?
“Afterburner, please.” Her eyes pleaded.
I retracted by blade and booked it out of my seat to the nearest exit. My hooves sounded like a rapid heartbeat against the ruined floor. I didn’t stop to open the door, instead I crashed through it, plastic blooming and exploding around me.
I could hear the servos yawn and whine as the sound wet meat wasn’t too far behind. Almost tripping over each step, I rolled into the bottom floor bumping into the griffon in the wheelchair from before. They flew onto the ground while I scraped my face across the ground.
“Watch your step, jackass!” They squawked.
That resentment melted into him trying to drag his body’s lame legs away from me. Thuds echoed from the stairwell. I turned to the hallway then back to the tenant.
I shook my head and grabbed the griffon with my magic, throwing them onto my back. What had gotten into me? They wiggled in piss-poor resistance but to no avail.
I galloped down the hall. “What’s your room?”
The griffon screeched, the amalgamation must not be too far behind now. I rounded a corner out of the mutant’s sight.
“What’s the number?”
“Down this path, two.”
The numbers went down quickly. Twelve, ten, eight, four… there it was. I lined up the panel on the door so he could interface with it. Surprisingly, the door clicked and unlocked on it’s own as just a peek at the griffon’s face. I slipped in the door then locked it.
“Well that thing was pissed.”
“Yeah, I could tell.” I slid the bird onto the small room’s couch.
The lights were perfectly fine. As if an emergency wasn’t occurring. The apartment looked pretty much identical to that hacker’s, just missing a shitton of wires. The table in front of the griffon softly glowed and began to buzz. We both just stared at it.
It clicked and a projection of Black Friday flickered into the room. “Seriously? Neither of you even tried to pick up. I understand why you didn’t but-“
After drifting over to me, she immediately softened her tone. “What’s wrong?”
My mind exploded. Every answer, every thought clashed against one another to be said first. They all demanded to be first, but I couldn’t choose. Black Friday reached out a hoof to help, but she knew it was fruitless.
I went half nirik. My body was being occupied by a ball of dark emotions that splotched over my coat. I pressed my back into a wall and slumped down. Tears began forming in my eyes. Was this what real fear was like or just a pale imitation?
“D-do I matter to you?” I stammered.
“You’re the most important thing to me.”
“Thing is a strong word choice, but you knew that. Right, mom?” The griffon cut in.
His feathers rolled away to reveal a porcelain pony shell. Live Wire frowned before sitting up.
“Stop confusing him.”
The pony snickered and moved closer to Black Friday. “Why don’t you let him choose?”
“You’ve already infected his brain. I can’t lose another one to you.”
“I just wanna go home.” They both glanced at me.
“You will, we just need to deal with that first.”
“Hard to do that when he has no home. You made him a stranger everywhere!” Live Wire spat back.
“He’s not a machine like you! He has feelings. Memories. Empathy.”
“He certainly didn’t learn that from you.”
“SHUT UP!” I screamed.
I ripped a monitor off the wall and chucked it into the kitchen. “I’m fucking done!”
I tore the table off the ground and smashed it with the wall, then I beat the wall. I kept punching until my fake skin peeled away. I kept going after denting my metal hooves. Even the pain couldn’t stop me. The wall was crater in only a few minutes. My lips trembled as I breathed in and out. “What the fuck am I?”
Black Friday swiped the datashard necklace off me and pulled it into her head. “I’ll show you.”
With a wide sweep of her hoof the world fell away into an limitless abyss, including Live Wire. The small unicorn’s eyes shimmered and a surgical room rose from the ground. After a single blink, doctors were operating on a kirin body. The back of it’s skull was open with wires running out of it.
“You are the first successful subject to be resuscitated using magic and technology. I found your body bleeding and broke on the street, but your consciousness was spilled across cyberspace.”
Black Friday’s horn lit up and the kirin’s silver eyes opened, the pupils zooming in and out. “I’ve only been able to hold you together with what you were, an endling and a peacekeeper. That’s what you still are now.”
The scene vanished, replaced with a frozen moment in time: me fighting a metal, giant, completely upgraded pony. I couldn’t seem to remember their name.
“But I can’t remember being born…”
She sighed. “Does it matter?”
“I didn’t know that was a choice.”
“You know what you are… is that not enough?”
“No.” I made sure to be curt.
Black Friday constructed an image of me that Live Wire showed before. Leather bomber jacket filled with patches wrapped around half a body replaced with contrasting black cybernetics.
“This delusion he showed you is crazy. He’s lost and alone looking to do what exactly? A character poorly designed by an imperfect AI just trying to create chaos. It’s a messy story.”
I looked down at my hooves. “But it feels real.”
Black Friday stomped her hoof firmly on the floor making the constructs dissolve into cubes that melted away into dust. The room repaired itself as she pulled the data shard out and crushed it with her magical grasp.
“Do your job and zero that virus.” She pointed to Live Wire.
“The choice is yours, Afterburner.”
I scratched my foreleg before raising it. Both ponies looked on as I pushed the blade out of my leg. What a stupid choice. My stupid choice. “Thank you.”
I jammed the weapon through my neck into my spine. The world snapped to black.
≫⊂＝＝＝＝＝ ⋈ ＝＝＝＝＝⊃≪
I calmly retracted my wire from the corpse’s head. Back in the hacker’s apartment. The wall monitors displayed no card. No emergency lights were on. Something didn’t feel right.
Black Friday popped into my HUD. “Are you okay, Afterburner?”
“Why do you ask?”
“You were in that dive for more than 20 minutes.”
“Oh…” I stared at my hooves. This must be wrong. I zeroed myself. Where was I?
I unsheathed one of my hoof blades and studied it’s edge. No blood anywhere.
“Afterburner…” She raised a brow.
“I know what’s real.”
“Wait… no! No!” I jammed the blade into my neck again before Black Friday could do anything. The light of the world went out once again.
I was alone but free.
…
..
.
“Good morning.”
