Life With Diamond Tiara

The day of the Town Pageant came like Rainbow Dash performing a sonic rainboom. Diamond Tiara, Silver Spoon, Filthy Rich, and I, in my pink dress that I wanted to destroy, got in the limo. "PRANSUA!" Diamond Tiara called ahead, " Can you get me, and Silver a Cherry Shake?!" "Yes, Master Diamond." answered Pransua. Soon enough, he came with two Cherry Shakes. Boy, I wish I could have one. Luckily, Diamond Tiara didn't forget me over the pure excitement of the pageant. "Oh! I almost for got, Pransua!" said Diamond " Get a Cherry Shake with some Meow Mix on top. After all, it IS Chiffon's big day. That was the only decent thing Diamond had done. Diamond and Silver discussed the pageant routine, with me, and that was all that was said for the rest of the whole ride.

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As we walked up the stairs into the building where the pageant would be held, I saw a few cats I knew from the pound. I was lucky enough to have a short conversation with one that I knew very well: Abby. She was probably the nicest, funniest, cat I knew. "Hi, Abby! How's life been so far?" I said, trying to hold back the joy of meeting an old friend. I was lucky that she noticed me right away. "Oh, hey Chiffon! I'm doing GREAT! I live in a barn with this dog named Winona, who I thought was going to be dumb and slobbery, but she's not that bad, and-" Wait.... Barn? Winona? You must live with the Apple Family! That's too bad. It's unfortunate that you're living there with a bunch of apple farmers, when you could be living LUXURY with Diamond Tiara and Filthy Rich!" I said. By now, you probably know my evil scheme. You know, to switch lives with Abby so I don't have to live with a couple of snobs. If I wanted that, I would just travel to Springfield and live with Mr. Burns. But lets get back to the story. " You Know..." said Abby, a look of Mischief in her eyes, "The barn is a little shabby. Okay, I'll do it!" she exclaimed. "But when?" she asked, a hint of curiosity in her voice. "Ummmm.... Let's see how much pageants we can get through and once we get tired of it, we'll switch." I said gleefully. "Sounds like a plan!" she squeaked. Then she ran off. Typical Abby. Our conversation lasted about 2 or 3 minutes, and I was beginning to wonder what was holding Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon up. I turned over and saw Applebloom, Babs Seed, Scootaloo and Sweetie Belle. It looked like they were fighting with Diamond and Silver. I strained my ears to that direction. "Our cat is TOTALLY going to beat your shabby excuse for a feline in the competition!" Silver Spoon giggled. How dare she! How dare she just... Prance on up to the Cutie Mark Crusaders and just... just.... put me against my friend's owners! Well, she's a shabby excuse for a pony if  I have ever seen one. I felt like unsheathing my claws and releasing the fury, so I did. "OW!" Silver yelled "DIAMOND! Chiffon just... SCRATCHED ME!" Diamond gave me a mean look. "Then I guess we're just going to have to carry you to the pageant!" Diamond giggled. Oh Garsh.

                                                                When we got inside, The security guard asked us for our tickets. We gave them to him right away. Just then, the loudspeaker went on. "Attention, contestants! The Pageant will start in approximately 5 minutes!" Diamond, Filthy, and Silver RAN at the speed of light to the long line of contestants. I maybe a cat, but I can still add, count, and subtract. There were roughly 20 ponies and cats in front of us, mostly Mares and Colts, and 40 in back of us, mostly Fillies and Foals. Good. I didn't want to be first. That would be a drag. Then a light bulb popped up above my head. Maybe, if I run to the back, I'll have a better chance of winning. I'll study what the other cats do. If the majority of those cats do better than I think I have the ability to do, then I'll try my hardest to improve. If the majority of cats do horrible, I can save the day by wowing them with what I had originally practiced. Then I remember. Diamond is still holding me. Another Light bulb pops up. Remember how I expressed my anger and frustration at Silver Spoon, by scratching? Well, maybe, I could do the same thing To Diamond Tiara! They're practically the same people aren't they? So, I put my plan into action. Lucky for me, it worked! I could hear the sound of Diamond screeching, and it didn't take her long to start galloping. FAST. I ran as fast as my paws could take it. FINALLY, I got to the end. As Diamond Tiara finally caught up with me, I was startled to find that she wasn't gasping for breath. Instead, her face got red. "CHIFFON!" she shrieked. I could see the faces of some angry ponies staring at Diamond with uptight faces. "How DARE you lose our place! We could have been the 21st, but NO! Now we're 60th in line! What is the meaning of all this?" Now was my chance to explain. Being an animal, I couldn't speak, so I gave up. I just plopped down on the ground, knowing that Diamond would be furious if I did anything more, without having a way to explain. Silver Spoon trotted over to me. "Oh, you poor thing." she swooned. "DIAMOND, how could you do that to this  POOR, INNOCENT, cat?"  "Silver, what are you doing? He's in trouble now, can't you see that?" Diamond reasoned. Just then, Silver pulled something out of her saddle bag. It was a spoon. A silver spoon like the one on her cutie mark. She put what looked like meow mix on it, and gave it to me. That's when I realized something. I wanted Silver Spoon to be my owner, because she was sweet, and not as snobby or rich as Diamond Tiara was. Diamond Tiara was spoiled rotten, and I had a feeling she'd be better off with a chihuahua. But I didn't want to cause an ugly, friendship-breaking fight if I went with Silver.I guess Silver Spoon was feeling the same way. "BAD KITTY!" she said. "That's not yours!" Fine. I didn't want it anyway. Hmph.

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        Most of the cats were horrible. With only 10 being good. The cat with 10 from all 4 judges, the highest score so far, was Abby. I was next. I took a deep breath, and stood there, as they reviewed What My name was, Who Owned me, etc. Just waiting for them to say "Okay, everypony, let's see what chiffon can do!" It eventually came in about 10 minutes. "Remember what we practiced." Filthy hissed from the line. I swished my tale, did a flip in the air, and did my best paw wave to the crowd. They gave 3 gave me a ten but the other did something amazing. He gave me an 11. That's IMPOSSIBLE. There's no such thing. But then I remembered: Anything can happen in Ponyville. The Announcer, after 5 minutes of being dormant, announced the winners. "In third place... DEVON!" I didn't know who the heck she was, but I was glad she won third place, at least. "In second place.... Abby!" I was happy she won second place, I mean, that's just as good as first place. I wonder who was going to win that. "And in 1st place....." I was scared and excited at the same time. I was okay with winning, but not too much. I didn't want everypony up in my face. The announcer stopped the awkward silence, finally saying the name of the winner and it was: Me. Oh no.